Credit to inccorectmacgyvercbsquotes over on tumblr for the first two lines of this fic.
"Why do you have to be you all the time?"
"You think it's easy?"
"Well, what's so hard about sitting there and yelling at me every time I try to do something?"
"Mac, look me in the eyes and tell me you think it's easy to be me."
"I think it's easy to be you, Jack. There. You happy now? Actually, don't answer that. I'm not done talking. All you ever do is act like you care, and then the second I mess up, you're jumping down my throat. In what world is that hard?"
"Look, kid, just because you're angry that you messed up doesn't mean-"
"Doesn't mean what? Doesn't mean that I can't make mistakes?"
"All I'm saying is- Bozer, what's you do that for?"
"Every town you guys play Call of Duty it gets too heated. I'm not sitting in the kitchen and listening to you guys fight anymore."
"...Can he do that?"
"He's your friend, man. And he gets scary when he's angry. I'm not fighting with him."
"Fair enough."