AN: I've been waiting for this for a long time.
Disclaimer:
I own nothing you recognise. This is all completely un-beta'd and totally fresh off the top of my brain!
James receives a text.
FUK U it reads. It's from 003.
His phone goes off again.
U FUK WAT DA FUK.
U FUKN FUK FUK U FUK.
Why, Bond replies.
U FUKN WNKR I HD 2G2 MEDCL U FUK.
Why, Bond replies.
Y DA FUK U HAV FIR ON WNDOW SILS?!
Why were you using the window sills.
I was tryn 2 say hi to bond niece.
Why didn't you just use the front door.
Y DA FUK U HAV FIR ON WNDOW SILS.
Front door.
BORING.
Did you honestly expect I would leave my niece unprotected?
FUK U FUKN FIRE.
Wasn't me, I did electric, 6 prob did fire.
UR BOTH DIKS FUK U I HD 2G2 MEDCL U FUK!
Use the front door like a regular person you prick.
FUK U.
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