Chapter 38

Louise knocked at the door before opening it and letting herself in. "Hello! Anybody home?" she called as she advanced towards the parlor.

"Louise!" a voice promptly greeted her enthusiastically.

Christine, Lou thought in disappointment. She had come in the hope of talking to Rachel in private. In the last few days she had come to the conclusion that her friend was in a worse mood that she had initially thought, and she was sure that the reason behind her glumness was Christine. Lou would have liked to talk to Rachel before, but with her own problems with Kid, she hadn't had the time or the chance.

"And who's the most beautiful girl in Rock Creek?" Christine exclaimed as she reached out and took Alice from Lou's arms.

Louise sat down on the sofa while Christine took a seat across from her. "Isn't Rachel around?"

"She's putting her laundry away in her bedroom," Christine replied with a smile as she kept her attention focused on the fidgeting toddler on her lap.

Louise looked at her with curiosity. "You seem to be in very high spirits today," she remarked breezily.

Christine lifted her eyes to Louise and smiled. "I am," she stated self-assuredly. "Moving here has been the best decision I've ever made. I already feel much better."

"I'm glad," Lou said sincerely. "We're happy to have you here with us. Kid was very worried about you… we all were, but it's good to see you looking so well."

"You know something, Louise? I think I made a terrible mistake marrying Malcolm. I guess he loved me his own way, but I don't think it was the kind of love you and your husband share."

"Christine, every couple is different," Lou replied. "Kid and I ain't the best example. We've had big problems too."

"Yes, but you stayed together to solve those problems."

"We're still learning," Lou replied in a small voice. "It's not easy."

"But you're such an inspiration," Christine insisted. "What happened between me and Malcolm was a real eye-opener. I was blinded by other things and I failed to value what I had before my very nose. If I'm not too late now, I think I can start mending my past mistakes."

Lou frowned, wondering if her words referred to Paul indirectly. "What do you mean by that, Chris?"

The answer never came since steps resounded in the staircase and Rachel appeared. "Lou, what a nice surprise!" she greeted Louise warmly. "What brings you to my humble home at this time of the day?"

"I came to see you," Lou replied. "It's been a while since we last had one of our conversations… you know, with all the hustle I've had at home."

"Let me make some tea then," Rachel offered, but before she scurried away into the kitchen, Christine spoke up.

"Don't bother to make any for me, Rachel. Paul is picking me up in a few minutes to take me to see Mrs. Rogers about that job."

Rachel stiffened as she heard Christine mention Paul. "All right then," she said stiffly and headed for the kitchen.

It hadn't gone unnoticed by Lou the way Rachel had reacted to Christine's words and she was now positive about the source of the problem. Lou didn't know how things between Paul and Christine were. Kid had told her that he had seen them together in town a few times, but Lou imagined that Paul was simply helping Christine in the hard times she was going through. It would be too crazy for Christine to resume her old romance with Paul when not even a month had gone by since she had left her husband. Technically, Christine was still a married woman, and Lou couldn't think that Paul would get involved with her in the present circumstances. Yet, Lou also knew that Paul had been very much in love with her, and Christine was the kind of woman that couldn't live an independent life without a man by her side, regardless whether it was a family member like Kid had been for many years or a man sharing her bed.

"Louise," Christine whispered as she scooted closer on the sofa. When she was sure she had Lou's complete attention, she said, "I think something's not right with Rachel. She's been acting kind of strange lately."

Lou threw a quick glimpse at the kitchen door to see if it was safe to talk. It was shut and their voices wouldn't reach Rachel. "Yes, I know," Louise simply said.

"You've noticed too?" Christine asked in a surprised tone and Lou nodded. "What do you think is the matter with her?" the blonde woman asked again.

"I… I don't know," Louise lied. "Have you talked to her about it, Chris?"

"Yes, I asked her but she says she's fine," Christine replied in a soft voice. "Maybe you should have a word with her, Louise. You've been friends with her much longer than I have and she might feel more comfortable sharing whatever worries her with you."

Louise nodded again. "That's what I'm here for."

Rachel came back to the parlor a few minutes later bringing the tea, and a plate of gingerbread cookies she had baked the day before. As she was serving the hot brew for Lou and herself, they heard the sound of a wagon stopping outside. "That must be Paul," Christine announced as she rose and went to the window. "Yeah, that's him," she added when she had a look outside. She passed Alice to her mother and said, "I have to leave you now."

Christine walked to the mirror and stood there, checking her blonde hair was in a perfect condition. Meanwhile, from her sitting position on the sofa, Rachel watched her attentively. Christine was truly a beautiful woman. She had a nice build, gorgeous green eyes and perfectly smooth cream skin. She was clearly the type of woman men usually fancied. In a way, Rachel thought that Christine had a certain resemblance to her as they both shared some common features and their personalities were kind of similar. This likeness made her wonder if Paul had found a substitute for Christine in her during these months. Naturally, she couldn't replace the original in all senses, and in comparison Rachel felt she was at the losing end. Christine was younger, her beauty was more stunning and she had something in her that enchanted anybody who met her.

"Ladies, wish me luck," Christine said as she walked to the door. "I hope Mrs. Rogers likes me and lets me work for her."

Lou and Rachel bid the woman goodbye and when the sound of the door closing stopped echoing in the silent room, the women turned their attention to their tea without saying a word. It was Rachel who, after a few minutes, broke the silence that had settled in the room after Christine had gone. "So, Lou, tell me. How are things between you and Kid?"

"Well… we're surviving," Louise replied in a casual manner.

"Does Charlie still visit you?" Rachel asked again.

"Oh God yes," Lou answered in a bitter tone. "I still can't understand why. He spends almost all the time playing with Joseph as if he were just a little boy. I sometimes think my son is the reason he drops by instead of his own daughter. Kid's being very understanding but I'm not so much. He unnerves me."

"That's understandable," Rachel said.

"But please let's not talk about me and … Charlie," Lou added, swerving the direction of the conversation drastically. "What about you, Rachel?"

"Me?" the blonde woman echoed innocently.

"Rachel, I'm not a fool. I know there's something troubling you and I'm your friend. Is it Paul?" Rachel stared at Louise for a few seconds, debating with herself whether she could express what tortured her soul lately, and she finally nodded.

"Louise, I don't like the way I'm feeling lately. I've always had a very free relationship with men. I never had problems in finding the right company when I felt in the mood. I know I haven't acted well and broke some hearts… even consciously. Sometimes using men made me feel powerful but now…"

"Now what?"

"The wheel has turned and I'm the one down. I'm suffering the same treatment I inflicted on others like poor Percy Winslow," Rachel explained in a bitter tone.

"Rachel, do you mean you…"

"Yes, I'm in love with Paul," the blonde woman stated in a desperate tone before Lou completed her question. "I love him, but he's in love with somebody else!"

"Have you talked to him?"

Rachel shook her head. "There's no need. I know. He hasn't approached me in two weeks… since Christine got here."

"But haven't you asked him why? You deserve an explanation."

"Louise, we never had a commitment to each other. From the beginning we agreed that whenever one of us wanted to end it, we wouldn't force an awkward moment and that's what's happening. Christine is free now and he's always been in love with her."

"I know that," Lou replied. "But I still think you should talk to him. Maybe you're jumping to the wrong conclusions. Do you really believe he and Christine are together? You should know. She lives in your house and I think she's still struggling with the failure in her marriage."

"Maybe they're not together in that sense, but they will be. I'm sure he has hopes that something will eventually lead her to him. So that's why he's stopped seeing me. He thinks that it wouldn't look very promising to Christine's eyes if he's doing it with me when he plans to woo her," Rachel said, not caring about sounding rude and coarse. She was too hurt and she knew she could talk to Lou about anything in any terms because she wouldn't judge her or feel shocked. "I didn't know this could hurt me so much."

"It does when it's true love," Lou replied knowingly and stretching her arm to Rachel, she squeezed her hand. "I still think you should talk to him."

Rachel gave her a wry smile. "I'll think about it then."

Paul drove the wagon back to the way station with a very smiling Christine sitting next to him. As he had guessed, Mrs. Rogers had been very pleased with Christine and hadn't hesitated to give her the job. "I'm so glad everything turned out to be as I expected. It was time I struck luck for a change."

"I don't know if I would call that luck," Paul joked. "Just wait until you meet the Rogers' children and give me your opinion then. Those children are a handful."

"My Matt is sometimes difficult too and when he gets together with his cousin and Buck's daughter, they're terrible," Christine replied with a smile. "I don't mind hard work and I love children. Hopefully, with this pay I will be able to get myself a place of my own to live. Rachel's been awfully kind to me, but I don't want to outstay my welcome." At Rachel's name being mentioned Paul turned serious, a change that Christine didn't notice, and she continued, "Paul, I need to thank you for being such a good friend all these weeks."

"Don't mention it," he replied breezily.

"Oh yes. I need to say it," Christine insisted and in a daring motion, she brushed her hand over the length of his arm in a soft caress. Paul stared at her in stunned silence, not expecting her actions at all. Christine batted her eyelids flirtingly and with a big smile she leaned over and whispered in his ear in a husky voice, "You know, I'm so sorry I let you escape. But there's a saying. Better late than never."

Paul stopped the wagon and shifted on the seat to her. Christine stared at him with big eyes and Paul couldn't avoid feeling flushed and bothered. She was so beautiful that any logical thoughts disappeared from his mind, and he couldn't look back. He knew her traits by heart from all the times he had beheld her: when she slept by his side, when she laughed at his silly jokes, when she listened to his words, when she was happy, when she sad, when she was angry. She was always beautiful no matter what, simply breathtaking.

Christine smiled enticingly as Paul stared at her. She knew what was on his mind right now, but he wouldn't take the first step, so if something was going to happen, she'd have to take the matter in her hands. So she leaned over closer and touched his lips with hers softly. Her mouth moved over his still one expertly, silently asking for access to his realm, and once over the surprise, Paul reacted, opening his lips to meet her demanding kiss. But suddenly, as he kissed her, something snapped inside him. This felt different from what he remembered; he didn't feel the thrill and the excitement he used to when they were together. All this seemed empty of all meaning and strangely in the fog of his mind, the image of Rachel popped up, which managed to make his sleepy heart beat faster as his lips continued kissing another woman. Realizing that this was wrong, Paul clasped his hands around Christine's forearms and gently pulled away. Christine stared at him with a confusion expression and Paul said, "I'm sorry, Chris, but I can't do this."

"If you're worried about me being married, you shouldn't. I'm as good as a single woman, I signed the divorce papers this morning," Christine explained as her fingers played with the buttons of his shirt.

"Christine, is this your way to get even with your husband?"

The woman lifted her eyes to him. "Of course not!" she exclaimed quickly, but on noticing his fixed, no-nonsense eyes, she softened the tone. "Well, maybe there's a little of that, but Paul, I've also realized that we're the best together and I think I love you."

Paul shook his head, hating what he was going to do. Even though Christine had hurt him in the past, he didn't like to cause a similar heartache to her. "This can't happen, Chris, because I don't feel the same anymore," Paul said, and the moment the words were out of his mouth, he felt a massive sensation of liberation in his soul. "And … there's somebody else."

"Who?" she asked in clear disbelief.

"Rachel," he whispered sheepishly.

"Oh…" Christine let out clumsily as the truth dawned on her. Rachel had been acting weirdly around her and now she could understand the reason of her mood.

"In any case, our story is over too. I think she got bored already," Paul continued. "We kind of agreed to simply enjoy each other's company, but you know me. I'm a hopeless weakling and once again I've lost my silly heart to her even though she doesn't care about me."

"Rachel is a good woman," Christine admitted even though her pride felt hurt. "Paul, I think you're wrong about her. I can't believe she's not so involved in that relationship as you are. Her behavior makes me think otherwise."

"She hasn't talked to me in weeks. We… we used to meet every night in my rooms, but she hasn't shown up once lately," Paul explained awkwardly. "And I've noticed that she never lets herself to stay alone with me. She's clearly avoiding me."

"That doesn't mean anything," Christine insisted. "I'm a woman and I understand these things better than you, Paul. And sometimes we women can be a bit complicated."

"Only a bit?" Paul joked, his mouth twitching into a crooked grin.

"Paul, if you love her, go after her. Don't give up."

"I don't know, Chris. I don't want to make a fool of myself once again. I also have my pride."

"Oh please, don't let what happened between us chicken you out. Rachel can't be as stupid as I was. Tell me. What do you want from her?"

"I want to be her only man, wake up next to her every morning and grow old next to her," he stated, another surge of relief coursing over his body. Other than just a few words with Kid, he hadn't told anybody about Rachel and much less what his real feelings were. Talking about this to Christine made him feel much better.

"You mean you want to marry her?" Christine asked, obviously surprised by Paul's strong feelings, and she had to admit to herself that she was hurt and jealous. Paul nodded to her question and telling herself not to be bothered by this, Christine smiled brightly. "Paul, let's work as a team and let me help you. Please. This is an important moment in a woman's life and I won't let you blow it. You're going to propose to Rachel at the right moment and it will be a proposal she will never forget. Just trust me."