I do not own Twilight or its characters. Stephenie Meyer does.

April and Gabby, thank you for pre-reading, and Fran, thank you for editing. Any mistakes left are my own.

*Some may want tissues for this*

Ch. 34

EPOV

Monday was hell.

I had this uneasy feeling since I left Seattle yesterday without Bella. I missed her already. I went through the motions of going to classes but didn't really pay attention to anything that was said.

A loud clatter brought me out of my deep thoughts. I looked up to see that Emmett had arrived at our lunch table. As he set his tray down, his orange bounced and rolled off the edge.

Why couldn't he put his tray down like a normal person?

"Hey, where's the pixie?" Emmett asked as he pulled his chair close to the table with a loud screech.

"Alice is out sick today," Rose answered.

I perked up and became concerned. "She's sick? How sick?"

Rose shrugged. "I don't know ... fever and cough. My mom thinks she overdid it, working so hard."

"She shouldn't visit Bella while she's sick," I said worriedly. I prayed that Alice didn't infect Bella this past weekend.

"She's well aware of that," Jasper said curtly.

"This weekend we will all be going to the championship game anyway, so Alice should be fine by the next time we see Bella." Rose placated me.

I felt relieved by that. It also meant I would get Bella to myself this weekend. Not that I minded the others coming. I just enjoyed not having them around all the time.

"It should be televised again if you two want to watch. I figured you'll still be going up there," Emmett said with a small smile.

"I will. What you did was pretty cool by the way. Bella and I both want to thank you." I was still surprised at his plea during his interview.

"Every little bit counts, right? I can't take all the credit either. The Hales helped get that interview to other news stations around the U.S. I just hope there are matches for Bella and other kids like Riley." Emmett shrugged sheepishly.

"Oh yeah, before I forget." I retrieved the paper turkey from my backpack. "Riley made this for you."

Emmett's eyes lit up. "Really, that's pretty cool." He turned it over and chuckled at the inscription.

"How sweet." Rose smiled at it. "Speaking of forgetting…my mother and Esme want to start a toy drive at the school for the kids at the hospital, and they want us all to help."

"I'll help," I said.

"I will too, but there's no way I'm dressing up as an elf or as Santa like Mom wanted. That's where I draw the line," Jasper said.

"I'll be Santa. Sounds like fun. Jasper can be Rudolf." Emmet grinned.

"Fuck you." Jasper scowled.

"Uh-uh. That will just get you on my naughty list." Emmett snickered.

"This conversation is getting weird." I shook my head and rolled my eyes.

"So does it hurt?" Emmett asked.

"Does what hurt?" Jasper looked as confused as me.

"Getting your bone marrow tested," Emmett asked.

"I would imagine so. They take a needle and insert it into the bone to withdraw a sample," I answered.

"A needle? How big?" Emmett asked paling.

"I have no clue. You'd have to ask Bella," I answered him shortly, something seemed off.

"Don't any of you remember?" Emmett looked around the table.

"Why would…wait…are talking about donors being tested?" Jasper furrowed his eyebrows.

"Yeah." Emmett nodded.

"Didn't you get tested?" I asked incredulously.

"No, not yet," Emmett answered.

I blinked in confusion. What the hell? He asked others to get tested, but he hasn't done it himself.

"Why the hell not?" I snapped.

"My dad wouldn't let me. I don't turn eighteen until next week, so I had to wait. I'm going to as soon as I can." Emmett frowned.

My shoulders fell in defeat. "Sorry. I didn't know."

"Don't be. I was just as mad as you when he refused to sign off on it. He didn't want anything to interfere with me playing ball." Emmett shrugged.

"They just do a cheek swab to check if you can be a match. No needles involved," Rose explained.

"That's it? I can handle that." Emmett looked relieved.

"You do know there will be an operation involved if you are a match, right?" I asked.

Emmett cringed but nodded. "Yeah, I figured. But they knock you out for that, don't they?"

"If they don't, I'll be happy to lend a helping hand." Jasper smirked.

"Geeh, thanks," Emmett said dryly.

"I'm going to head to class early; I'll see you guys later." I had no appetite at the moment.

I collected my things and headed out of the cafeteria. The outside air was a sharp contrast to the warm cafeteria. I kept my head down to block the wind from hitting me full blast in the face.

"Edward, hold up," Jasper called from behind me.

I turned around to see him walking swiftly in my direction with his hands in his pockets.

"Fuck it's cold." He stopped in front of me.

"Yes, it is. What's up?" I wanted to get this over with quickly.

"Are you doing okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine," I answered, wondering why he was even asking.

Jasper arched an eyebrow. "I don't believe you."

"I'm fine," I insisted, becoming irritated. "If that's all." I turned to leave.

"Bella is worried about you. And from what I've seen lately I don't blame her." He stopped me short.

I whirled around. "You've been talking to Bella about me? I thought you didn't like psychoanalyzing people?"

"Not too long ago you called me out for my shitty attitude so now I'm returning the favor." Jasper ignored my outburst. "Since Bella has gotten sick, you've started to shut down, and when you're not doing that, you're snapping at people for ridiculous things like candy bars."

"I'm not…"

"You are." He cut me off. "You may not even realize you're doing it. Everyone handles stress and difficult situations differently. You were right about us being similar. We both get defensive and try to deflect when things go wrong."

He paused for a moment. "Someone like Bella…they worry about other people and try to help them, putting themselves on the back burner. So while she's sick and fighting for her life—she more concerned if you're okay—how you're handling it. And don't take this the wrong way, but right now she shouldn't be concerned about anyone but herself."

"I agree." I nodded in agreement.

I hated myself for making her worry about me. I crossed my arm and looked away from him.

"Then do something about it. You need to get yourself in a better place to help Bella. I'm not saying you haven't been a good boyfriend—I know you're doing your best to take care of her. However, letting things fester inside of you isn't good. If you need to vent, you know any of us will listen. I get you're probably scared for her—we all are," he said passionately.

"I'll try. I don't mean to take my frustrations out on anyone else. I just can't…I can't lose her again." I clenched my eyes shut.

I felt his hand squeeze my shoulder. The small gesture was comforting.

"She's a fighter. If anyone can make it she will," he said confidently.

RR

It was still early when I got to Physics class—the teacher wasn't even in the room yet. I pulled out my cell phone and called Dr. V.

"Dr. Volturi's office."

"Hi, this Edward Cullen. I was wondering if there was any way I could get an appointment today?"

"Let me see…the only appointment I have is for three-thirty," the receptionist said.

"I'll be there. Thank you."

I would have to skip last period, but it was only P.E. so I figured my mother would be okay with it. I called the house and was surprised when my father answered. I thought he had to work today.

"Son, aren't you suppose to be in class?" he asked.

"It's lunch period. I need a favor; can you call in an excuse for me from my last class. I need to go see Dr. V., but I would have to leave school early for his only appointment."

There are a few beats of silence on his end. "Did something happen?"

"No…yes…I just really need to see him before Friday," I confessed.

"All right. I'll make the call. Do you want your mother or me to go with you?" he asked.

I appreciated the offer, but this was something I had to do on my own. "Not this time."

"Okay, let us know if you change your mind," he told me.

I hung up and noticed I was no longer alone in the room. I grew nervous since cell phones weren't allowed in the classroom. Mr. Banner was quietly shuffling paperwork on his desk.

"I'm sorry, sir, it won't happen again," I apologized.

He looked up at me thoughtfully. "Class hasn't started, so I can excuse it."

"Thank you, sir."

He didn't say anything for a moment as he tapped the papers on the table. "How is Bella fairing?"

I was surprised that he asked me. "She's doing as well as can be expected, I suppose. She finished her first round of chemo last week and they let her out for the break. She's still in high spirits and is fighting."

"That's good to hear. Tell her we are looking forward to having her back with us soon." He smiled.

"I will," I promised.

RR

The next day, I was feeling better. Talking with Dr. V. helped a lot. He suggested some relaxing techniques I normally would have scoffed at. But I found that meditation actually helped to calm me.

I tried not to worry about the fact that I hadn't heard from Bella since Sunday. We had missed each other before since she tended to sleep at odd hours but I usually got a message back.

After school, we were all in my living room discussing the toy drive. Alice had returned to school looking pale and tired. I hopefully didn't offend her by trying to keep my distance. She was still coughing, and I didn't want to chance getting sick or bringing something to Bella.

Mom and Mrs. Hale were in the middle of an idea about awarding the class that brings the most toys with something like a pizza party when Dad arrived home. He stood in the doorway with a somber expression.

"Hi, dear, you're home early. Did something happen at work?" My mother looked concerned.

"Work was okay. I was hoping to catch everyone here; I have something to tell you all." He glanced around the room, his gaze stayed on mine longer than the others.

Suddenly a feeling of dread washed over me. Something was wrong, and I was scared of what he had to say.

"Dad…" I asked, practically begging him to spit it out already. And at the same time, I didn't want to hear it.

"Give me a second, son." He sat next to my mother and squeezed her hand.

"It's Bella, isn't it?" Rose asked, leaning into her mom, her eyes large with worry.

My dad nodded his head very slowly, and I swear my heart stopped for a few moments.

"Bella was admitted to the hospital very early Monday morning. She started feeling sick Sunday night and went downhill very fast. They diagnosed her with pneumonia and are keeping her isolated, so I'm afraid there will be no visits for a while. And before you argue about it, even her own parents are being kept out at the moment." He caught my eyes and gave me a sympathetic look.

"Is this my fault?" Alice looked ready to cry as she hugged her arms to her.

"No one is finger pointing. Bella's immune system is very low, due to her treatments. She could have picked it up from anyone without them knowing they were carrying something. It could have easily have been me since I work in a doctor's office or her own father who responds to emergency calls."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath like Dr. V. taught me. I started to count backward before I snapped at anyone.

"Bella wouldn't want you to blame yourself," Jasper told Alice, rubbing her back.

I opened my eyes. "He's right—she wouldn't."

Jasper shot me a grateful look as Alice managed a weak smile.

"How long will she be in isolation?" Rose asked.

My father looked wary. "There's no way of knowing yet."

"She will get better though, right?" Emmett sounded anxious.

"I can't make any promises, and I'm not going to sugar coat it. They caught it early; however, her body is already in a weakened state, so there is no way of knowing for sure," he explained.

The room was filled with a heavy silence and no one spoke. The girls were crying, and the guys were avoiding eye contact with everyone. I stood up quickly and started to make a hasty exit.

"Edward," my mother called after me.

"I need to be alone." I continued my way to the stairs.

Once I reached my room, I locked the door behind me, not wanting to be followed. I sat on the bed with my head in my hands, pressing my palms to my forehead, trying to release some of the tension.

Meow

I felt a small head bump into my hand. When I ignored her, Nessa only tried harder to catch my attention.

"What cat?" I dropped my hands to stare at her.

She rubbed against me and started purring. She headbutted my hand a few more times until I began to pet her. She curled up in my lap and seemed content. I felt my anxiety slowly melt away.

I had to believe that Bella would get through this.

This would only be a detour, but she was in the best place she could be at the moment for receiving help—I tried to reassure myself.

I repeated those thoughts in my head.

RR

The next few days were harder than I could imagine. Bella remained sick and in isolation—I felt helpless. I went to school and then came home and locked myself in my room—waiting for a phone call to tell me she was better.

On Thursday, Mom had enough of my sulking, and she kicked me out of the house to deliver a casserole to Chief Swan. When I pulled up to his house, it was dark except for the living room windows. The cruiser was in the driveway, so I was pretty sure he was home.

He answered the door looking tired and years older. "Edward, what can I do for you?"

"I have a casserole from my mother. It's still warm if you haven't eaten yet. Or you can save it, she sent reheating directions." I held up the tray.

"Between her and the Hales, I haven't had to order out or miss Bella's cooking too much. Please thank her for me." He took it from me.

It was then it occurred to me how alone Chief Swan must be. Everyone else had someone to lean on—I had my parents, and Mrs. Dwyer had her new husband.

Who did Chief Swan have?

"Could I come in and hang out for a bit? My mother pretty much shoved out the door earlier," I asked.

He arched one eyebrow. "What did you do?"

"Nothing. I think that was the problem, she had enough of my sulking around the house."

"Well come on in. There's a game on, have you eaten?" He stepped aside and gestured for me to enter.

"No, sir. But I wouldn't feel right eating what my mom sent over," I said.

"I have plenty, trust me. I don't think I can eat all of it myself," he said.

"Well, if you're sure, thank you." I followed him into the kitchen.

He pulled two plates out of the cabinet and opened the casserole.

"Has there been any changes?" I asked.

He frowned as he slid a plate towards me. "Not as much as I hoped. Her lungs sound clearer and her fever has gone down, but she still hasn't woken up."

"Are you going to the state championship game this weekend?" He dug into his food but didn't eat it yet.

"I was going to head to Seattle," I told him.

He gave me a sympathetic look. "Son, you know they won't let you see her."

"I know, but it will make me feel better being there," I insisted.

"Well suit yourself. Unless anything changes I'll be around here trying to keep busy. I can't sit in those infernal waiting rooms just doing nothing but staring at a clock. I just start thinking of everything that could go wrong," he said gruffly.

I felt more sympathy for the guy. "I know I can speak for both my parents if you want to join us for dinner anytime you're welcome to."

"I may take you up on that one night." He nodded. "How's the furball doing? I can't believe I miss the little ankle biter. My chair has been cold." His mustache twitched.

"She's doing well. I know I told Bella I'd take care of her but if you would like Nessa to come home, I can bring her back tomorrow," I offered.

He started to shake his head but stopped. "You know what, kid, that would be nice, it's too quiet around here."

After we finished our meal, I spent another half-hour with Chief Swan watching a game. When I got home my mother was sitting in the living room, reading a magazine.

"You were gone a long time," she commented.

"I spent some time with Chief Swan. He might come to dinner one night, I hope you don't mind," I told her.

"Of course, I don't." She stood up and came over hugged me.

"Mom." I squirmed.

"Oh hush, you're never too old for a hug from your mother. I'm glad you spent some time with Charlie. I hate he's all alone in that house," she said.

"I didn't even think about how he was handling it. That's why you sent me over, isn't?" I asked.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." She smirked.

A/N: Thoughts? Just to be clear, Alice wasn't knowingly sick around Bella when she was coming down with something, it may of not been her either. How about Charlie? What about the idea for a toy drive? In case anyone is worried because of the holiday, I will be updating like normal next Friday.

Thank you for all your love and reviews you have given my story.

Beta Note: Pay it Forward has a new blog, looking to highlight four stories a month. The first being, a newbie, someone who has never posted before, and is looking for help getting started and noticed. The second, from veteran writers, who are about to post a new story. The third from the vault. We're looking for readers to suggest and write a small review of a fic that is an oldie but goodie. The fourth a story low on reviews that could use a shout out.

Contact Frannie Walsh on FB for more details or to suggest a fic. You can find the blog here. Pifficsofthemonth dot blogspot dot com.