Hi everyone! Again, I am sorry for the break I took! I only got inspired two days ago and managed to type this up...I feel like this is really bad so I am sorry but I tried improving it as best as I could! :D Please enjoy!

Chapter 38

"Agh!"

It was dark, as it has been for the entire time he had been here. Holding onto the wall with the tips of his fingers, Nowaki felt cold sweat shimmer down his back.

"Stop! Please!"

Nowaki choked, trying to accommodate for the pain that coursed throughout his whole body.

"A-ah," Nowaki inhaled sharply through his mouth as he felt himself being further torn, "P-please let go of me! I'll do any-AGH-thing you w-want,"Nowaki pleaded, his breathing uneven as he got pounded from behind.

One man was set on fucking the raven, while the other had his dick out, jerking off to the scenario.

Nowaki's face was flushed, with tears slowly streaming down his cheeks.

'They just came in... didn't say anything...and-' Nowaki's body shuddered out of pain as another thrust was delivered.

"Ooh we're not letting you go just yet, big guy," the man behind him grunted, smacking Nowaki's bare back.

The tall man hissed, shutting his eyes, and trying to shut his mind to the atrocities being done to his body.

'It's alright... just deal with it... he'll be done soon. You've endured worse,' Nowaki thought.

This had been a regular occurrence ever since Nowaki had arrived at Kanou's residence. Siting in the dark, day after day, fed minimally and fucked regularly. Sometimes it was Kanou, but most of the time it was other men. Nothing he wasn't accustomed to...just a more vigorous process.

"Please, please let go of me!" Nowaki screamed out, pounding his fist on the wall.

"Shut the fuck you slut, shut up or I'll fucking cut you," the abusive man seethed, pounding harder into Nowaki.

The dark-haired man looked up into the darkness, his tired eyes closing tightly as he prayed. He couldn't do anything else. He had nowhere to turn to. Nowhere to run. Nothing to live for but his love, who he missed so miserably and dearly.

Nowaki finally felt the man stiffen up, and in a second, he felt hot essence shooting up into his ass.

Nowaki froze, and finally, when the other let go of him, slid down to the floor. That's exactly when the other pervert had finished, and hot semen hit his face.

"Hah, what a whore. So worn-out and used," the fucker spit on Nowaki, mixing the sperm and saliva.

The two men, with one last laugh at Nowaki, left the room. For a brief second, Nowaki saw light as the door to his cell was opened, and then it was shut once more.

Nowaki gather himself on the floor once again, rubbing his cuff-chapped wrists. He had been briefly released for the purpose of his fucking. It wouldn't be a long time until Kanou came down and chained him again.

Nowaki had long understood: nobody was coming to rescue him. It was pointless. Pointless to scream. Pointless to beg.

'Pointless to live anymore...'

Nowaki's cobalt eyes widened at his own frightful thoughts.

'No...Hiro-san... I have to get back to you. I want to see you...but I can't. My love, I want to be with you...how are you? How is Miyagi treating you...or are you back at that asshole's place?'

The black-haired man grabbed his now-not-so-thick hair in his hands.

"Fuck!" Nowaki screamed, as he shifted a bit and felt intense pain in his back.

He was starving. His skin was a dull color, his face thin, his whole body a skeleton. Nowaki looked himself over and suddenly felt the past clashing upon him. The feelings that he felt inside so long ago, had repressed so successfully until now, had suddenly came crashing down upon him. His body, his appearance, his condition...they all were promptly catching up to him.

'I hate you...so stupid...so worthless...you were supposed to protect him...but you've been thinking only about yourself...you were his only protector and here you are... thinking of yourself... stupid...ugly...disgusting... just look at yourself... you'd think he'd want someone like you? All whored out?' Nowaki clenched his fists, breathing in and out heavily through his nose.

'These thoughts are selfish...Hiro-san has it so much worse.. and here I am.. pitying myself. What a fucking loser,' the slave reprimanded himself, shutting his eyes.

Suddenly, the door creaked open, and Kanou came into the room. The tall, masculine owner stood proud in front of his crouching slave. He approached Nowaki, with a look of victory in his eyes.

"I brought you some food. Eat up." Kanou set aside a bowl.

Kanou looked into Nowaki's eyes and smirked, "How're you liking your new home? I heard you stirred up some trouble with Akihiko. He was pretty lenient with you, wouldn't you say?"

After a pause, Kanou bent down to Nowaki's ear and whispered in a conniving manner, "Well don't expect that from me. Pull some shit with me and I'll make you regret it," Kanou smirked, his breath enveloping Nowaki's hot ear.

The man exited the room, leaving his slave stunned and trembling. With shaking hands, he picked up his meal, taking a sip of the liquid. Automatically, the poor man gagged, spitting it out. His master had given him semen in a bowl as a meal.

'Fucking bastard,' Nowaki thought heatedly.

His stomach growled. The man hadn't eatten in days.

Scrunching his face in disgust, Nowaki took the plate, throwing it across the pitch-black room, hearing it shatter against the wall. Surprised at his free hands, Nowaki gathered himself again, and slept, once again pursued by his devilish nightmares.

Hot water dripped down his body. It felt so nice after days of just sitting in his cell. The brunet lathered his hair breathing in the sweet smell of shampoo. He felt his whole body melt at the feeling of water streaming down his body, washing away all the filth of the chamber, as well as his inner demons. As Misaki's lathered hands traveled down his body,Misaki suddenly stopped at his stomach. His brows furrowed, and his green eyes shut. He felt a small firm bump form on his belly.

'Is this really true? What...what do I do if I really am...ugh it's unthinkable!'

Misaki's thoughts suddenly went back to a conversation that his parents had once had with him.

'Misaki...you're different. You...well...'

'I think what your mother is trying to tell you is that you're..the best way to put it is, I guess,...half male and half female.'

'How?! What are you talking about?'

'I know Misaki, I know this is hard to take in. But you have to understand...' Misaki's father said-

'You're different. You musn't tell anyone, Misaki. They will laugh at you...would you want that? You're...messed up and-'

'Ayame! What are you saying! He will have a normal life..I will make sure of it!'

Misaki opened his eyes, feeling a wetness of his own start streaming down his cheeks. They had really sold him...they had traded him in here.

'Had mother ever even wanted me? No...of course she did! I was her only son...she...she just sold me here for financial reasons...' the teen tried so hard to make up an excuse for his own cruel mother, but no matter how much he tried, he couldn't come up with one.

'You were right...aren't you happy?!'

"Now you have me, you have me..." Misaki lowered his head, "and my heart..."

'And yet I can't help but hate you... hate you and love you...how could this possibly ever work?'

Misaki turned off the shower, which had started to get cooler. He stood there, rubbing his arms, as shivers ran up and down his bony spine. Dressing himself in the clothes which turned into rags, Misaki exited the shower room. Standing next to the door, he debated going back to his room. He couldn't stand the thought of locking himself up in that cell again. However, he feared the never-ending darkness of the corridor. Finally, with a heavy sign, Misaki slid himself down against the door,gathering his wet head in his hands.

'When is this going to end?'

"Misaki, would you pass me my cigarettes?"

The brunet looked annoyed and rolled his eyes, "why don't you get them by yourself?" he mummbled

"Because if you come over here then I could just bend you over the couch and fuck you," Akihiko answered his boyfriend, smirking to himself as he read the newspaper in front of him.

Almost being able to feel the blush on Misaki's face, the man tilted his head back and pouted at Misaki, "please, my love?"

"Ugh," Misaki groaned, grabbing the coffee mug in defeat.

Cautiously, the teen brought it up to his boyfriend, who eyed him artfully from the couch.

"Here," Misaki set it on the table, and was about to dash away, if not for the older man.

The silver-haired man had grabbed Misaki's wrist, bringing him on top of himself.

Misaki tensed up for a moment, but then his face melted into a warm smile, "Why do you do this to me so early in the morning?"

He bent down, until his lips were centimeters apart from Usami's, "You know I can't resist you," the brunet whispered, a gleam in his eyes, bringing his lips close to Usami's.

Akihiko's eyes slowly fluttered open.

"Shit," he muttered, his sleep-dazed mind figuring out that his dream wasn't a reality.

"Shit."

"Fuck," Akihiko sat up in bed, gathering his head into his hands.

He felt his heart pang in his chest. He still felt the warmness and sweetness of Misaki's breath on his lips.

"Why... why can't it be like this?" Akihiko whispered bitterly, shutting his eyes.

'I'll never have you...will I?'