Chapter 38

Poor Wand'ring One

I don't own The Pirates of Penzance. But if I did, that would be awesome. Oh, and if you're going to listen to it, youtube Helen Donaldson's version because she is a beast.

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Dustin could probably wait for Cam to start prodding, whenever he was done mentally evaluating or doing whatever he had silently been doing, pondering, thinking, using that genius of his to silently take Dustin apart bit-by-bit to find the piece that was broken. He could wait but he was just… a little tired of waiting. Because this conversation was going to end up in the same place, that was no question. At the end of the day Dustin would be unmasked as not only a liar, but as weak and all that...sorrow that he had worked up earlier over a Cam that wasn't even his came back with a vengeance, this time just deserved.

That didn't mean he had to meet the other's eyes however, he just…couldn't.

He leaned heavily against Cam's chest, the tech carefully combing his fingers through the brunette's curly hair in a soothing fashion, making the yellow ranger feel worse than he already had.

No, that was it, no more pity. It was talking time.

Cam deserved that much.

"I'm afraid of water."

He didn't try to soften the blow or make excuses or slide it in gently, he just said it, said the thing that had weighed him down for months now, the thing that was slowly killing him inside.

Cam stilled but didn't say anything, probably waiting for Dustin to resort to his normal self and start babbling out the reasons and his fears and his concerns in an unorganized mess but he just…it wasn't in him. There wasn't any way to justify it, and even if there was he didn't deserve it because that didn't change the fact he had lied to Cam. And he had lied, that whole, "withholding super big important things from the people you care about" thing totally counted as lying, you couldn't even try to slip that past anyone. It was just how it went.

His throat constricted and he took a shuddering breath, trying to hold it together until he was finished. He swallowed quickly, blinking back the heat in his eyes.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," he whispered, voice cracking near the end, and then he pulled away. If he stayed Cam would feel obligated to comfort him, and he shouldn't, right now he deserved to feel angry and yell-y and Dustin deserved to be curled up in a corner where no one could see him. He would probably have to leave first, because it was very hard to yell at someone who was already crying. Unless you were absolutely heartless, but despite what others might think that wasn't Cam.

A hand wrapped around his elbow to pull him back but he shook it off, pressing his hands against his eyes to stop premature leaking.

"I'll come back," he promised, sounding oh-so assured in his barely audible voice, "after I-" and since the rest of that sentence was "go and cry somewhere" the first whimper broke through and he had to take several deep breaths before he could continue.

Somewhere beyond the safety of his hands Cam was moving, maybe in front of him, and then the tech's hands were back, one against his waist while the other sought out his shoulder.

"Dustin," he couldn't tell how the other sounded because he was just barely listening, "- talk to me."

He shook his head, not that he couldn't talk (well, right now he kind've couldn't) but he had to go and come back so they could be on even ground and this would be a lot easier if Cam could just see that. He tried to say it but all he could manage was a gasp and Cam was back, arms around him, firmly pulling Dustin's head against his chest and he tried to tell him that this wasn't right, to ask him why and…

He was so weak.

He couldn't fight it, even if Cam didn't know he was supposed to be angry yet; he didn't even bother trying to pull away again because it had hurt so much the first time. And Cam, stupid Cam just kept running his fingers through his hair, murmuring words that blended together while Dustin gave in and released his first sob, burrowing into the green ranger as though he had never tried to leave. He should be better than this.

But he just wasn't.

Eventually Cam led them somewhere, Dustin didn't really know or care, all he could do was follow. They halted gently, Cam taking away one of his arms for a moment and coming back with…a towel. A big, warm, somehow still dry towel because of course Cam would have emergency towels and of course he would share them because he was stupidly thoughtful and kind and caring and smart and-

It hurt, knowing that he failed someone so great this badly.

He didn't deserve Cam; no one did, but him least of all. He pulled the towel tight around him, using it as an excuse to pull away (and it hurt less because he knew he deserved it, knew it was necessary) and began to dry off as best he could. It was all so logical. He was afraid of water, he got wet, therefore the first thing to do was stop that "water" business from happening. Dry em' up real good. He pulled the rough material over his head, rubbing it a little harder than necessary. He needed to regroup.

The towel dropped down to his shoulders and he finally risked a look at Cam, his first since his…breakdown began.

He was still wet, dripping slightly, clothes clinging to him (he had a towel but he was too focused on Dustin to use it). His eyes were worried. Worried and concerned and probably confused and Dustin pressed the heel of hand against his right eye hard because he did not need to start that back up again.

"I'm sorry," he whispered again, voice gravely. "I should have-" his throat cut in, angry, and he snapped his mouth shut, and took deep centering breaths, focusing on the floor. A cup filled with water snuck into his vision what must have been a few minutes later and he accepted gingerly, taking a grateful gulp. He downed the rest of it quickly and wiped the back of his mouth, one hand firmly keeping the towel wrapped around his shoulders while the other placed the cup back on the counter, avoiding Cam's eyes for the second time.

It was like one of the world's worst games.

"This shouldn't be a problem," he exclaimed when the silence became too much, "I should be better than this, I should be stronger-" he trailed off again, fists clenched in the rough fabric of the towel. He had said this to himself a million times, over and over again, why couldn't he say it now? Why couldn't he just get the stupid words out of his mouth?

Cam's hands were back, warm and grasping the sides of his face, turning his head to meet the unyielding, caring gaze. Cam tipped his forehead against Dustin's, dropping one of his hands so that he could wrap it around his waist. The words dried up in the yellow ranger's mouth, taken back by the…concern…ferocity (only Cam could manage both) and he wondered if it was finally yelling time.

Except it turned out that it wasn't.

"Fear," Cam began in the same soft, confident tone that he used when explaining something to Dustin, effectively enrapturing him, "is illogical."

The words "No, duh" popped into mind but Cam continued before he could even think about voicing them.

"It is an emotional response, and like all emotional responses it is difficult, if not impossible to put rhyme or reason to." He halted to tilt his head, gently rubbing his thumb across Dustin's cheek. "I have a great deal of experience in agonizing over…emotional matters that were simply beyond my control."

A fondness passed through the other's eyes and despite the guilt Dustin should be feeling warmth flitted around inside him. Cam smiled knowingly, but wasn't finished.

"Fear is unavoidable," he explained, and the sadness overcame that tiny little reverie. Cam's grip tightened, because he knew, because he always knew. He refused to let Dustin's eyes wander and firmly grabbed his chin, tilting his head up. "It is how we approach it that makes the difference."

And he wanted to cry again, because how he had approached his fear so far sucked, but Cam wouldn't have it. He closed the distance between them, gifting Dustin with a reassuring kiss that thoroughly rocked the mechanic's world.

When he pulled back he was smiling again, arms locked around Dustin's waist.

"I assume," he said, head tilted in his "I am deducing many great things up in here" way that made Dustin feel giggly inside, "that you chose to…withhold this out of shame?"

Dustin winced, rubbing awkwardly at of his face at the blunt truth of it all. He nodded quickly, plucking at his lip. "I thought I was failing you guys."

Well, he was, but he knew that was the last thing Cam wanted to hear. But the green ranger had physic mind-reading abilities and figured out the unspoken part of his sentence anyway, frowning and eyes insistent as he leaned in close.

"You did not," he assured, so confident and resolute that Dustin forgot how to breathe for a moment…again.

That was becoming an awfully nasty habit of his.

"I…" he trailed off, wanting desperately to say something but unsure of exactly what. He had been so sure this was going to end in anger and yelling and maybe even break-up that he hadn't thought out how to take on any alternative. His plan had simply been to get over his stupid fear and then forget about it forever. This Cam being awesome thing was leaving him with real unsure footing.

So Cam, being Cam, went ahead and filled in the rest of his sentence with a kiss (because that was always the best way to emphasize your point) and Dustin sighed into it, finally giving into the maybe-happy vibe of this unorthodox confession.

He was all for where this was going.

"…though I must confess," Cam muttered as he pulled away, leaving a pouting Dustin, "when exactly...?"

Dustin nodded, knowing where he was going. "Toxipod's island. Blake paralyzed me and hurled me into the ocean."

He cringed as the memory flashed back, though Cam simply being present made it a lot better. At least, reminded him he wasn't alone.

Cam frowned, mind occupied with memory lane (which would be nice but there was better things to be doing right now).

"The pool party?" He asked, brows furrowed, and Dustin cut back in, shrugging.

"That's where I figured it out."

To think if he had just avoided pools forever he would have been fine.

And the ocean.

And his bathtub.

And rebelling cyber replicants that liked to take control of sprinkler systems.

See, if he had just avoided all those he probably would have been golden.

Cam probably had more questions (well, he always had questions, but like…never mind) but Dustin was tired and wet and getting kind of impatient so he decided to put his boyfriend's scientific brain to work and focus on one of their past experiments. Dustin had asked the green ranger if you really could kiss something better. They had done a lot of testing, but Cam said that the more data they had, the more accurate they could be.

So he would answer all those fear-related questions later; right now he wanted to do some major data gathering.

Smiling, Dustin ditched the towel around his shoulders and grabbed onto Cam's collar, pulling him forward into a rough kiss.

Things weren't perfect, he was still afraid, he had still lied, but now Cam knew the truth and the world hadn't ended so he figured the least he could do was take a moment to enjoy the day and not wallow completely in despair.

If he really wanted to he could do that later, but now…

Now it was time to "experiment".

You just never knew how exciting science could be until you really got hands-on.

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Be careful what you wish for was a stupid turn of phrase. If a person really had some deep hidden desire that they obsessed over they probably would have spent a great deal of time thinking about the implementation of their perfect wish. Seriously, if it was always on their minds they had to have at least put a little thought into the ramifications, both good and bad, that were bound to occur when they finally got their "wish" granted.

And as much as Hunter would like to think he was good at logic and planning and that his years of ninja training were enough to prepare him for anything and that he really had been expecting some kind of strong emotional response, he honestly couldn't say that any of that had prepared him for this particular response.

Which was also stupid, in the way that having theory and watching it get destroyed by reality was stupid. Or maybe that was just his bitterness talking.

Well, it wasn't like his minimal whining was going to help with the matter at hand, but still, ninja angst.

It was like regular angst, but with ninjas.

Which despite his complete submersion into the culture and repeated exposure to the point that the bizarrely abnormal had become run-of-the-mill, was still a lot of fun to joke about.

But that was also not the point.

"So…" Hunter began steadily, once Shane had ceased his laughing (it wasn't that funny), "what I'm getting from this," and what everyone should be getting from this if they weren't so busy taking interest in butterflies and cyber duplicants and not dating people, "is that you and Cam are experiencing some relationship problems."

He could tell by the growing frown on Shane's face that he probably could have worded that in a more delicate way that would have better appeased the leader's manliness, but that was an awful lot of effort and so far being anything but blunt and direct really didn't work for any of these people so Hunter put on his "just suck it up" face and decided to continue before the other ranger could think of complaining about it and pull them off track again.

"I'm also going to go ahead and assume," and he already knew this because the forced hang-outs were not done on a whim, "that this probably started immediately after he and Dustin began dating."

And yep, they were now in full-fledged frowny-world. At least Shane had stopped glaring; it wasn't like Hunter's the one who started this.

Okay, in a way he kinda did with the whole making-out-with-Dustin thing, but how was he supposed to know that was going to be so poorly received?

Shane nodded absently, running a hand through his hair and releasing a sorrowful sigh, which was outstandingly expressive for him, before giving Hunter a sad look. The look in his eyes was a familiar one, and it confirmed two things. One, that Shane didn't know what he did to earn the cold shoulder from Cam and two, that he wanted to do something about it, but wasn't sure if it would make it worse by doing so. He probably thought in some bizarre way that this null-contact thing was exactly what Cam wanted and the very act of confronting him about it would like…show his disrespect…or something.

Uh, who is he kidding, Hunter had no idea why Shane hadn't just grown a pair and confronted Cam about it. It would have been faster and probably a lot less stressful. Then again, it would have also probably been a good way to disrupt how the team functioned, at least for a little bit, so Hunter supposed he kind've understood why Shane was being all noble and self-sacrificing. Unless the problem would only get worse with time, in which case he was only being stupid.

But, you know, one thing at a time.

Shane cleared his throat suddenly, breaking Hunter out of his reverie.

"I don't know what I did," he murmured, plucking at the material of his shorts, and uh, this is what he must have sounded like that one time he complained to Sensei Omino after Blake refused to talk to him for a week. It turned out he had accidentally broken one of his…he couldn't even remember what it was now, but eventually he had gotten sick of it and forced Blake into a headlock until he started talking again.

Maybe Shane should try that.

There was another desolate sigh, and Hunter forced himself back on track, reevaluating his goals for this particular chat.

Goal number one, make Shane feel better.

The goal was pretty broad in itself, vague, but doable. All he had to do was let Shane unwind, or cut loose, or just talk it out, or do whatever he needed to do to feel better about it. Hunter thought about it and studied intently, rubbing his chin as Shane stared dejectedly at his shoes, seemingly dead to the world. Okay, so they were done shouting. Apparently that earlier outburst was as much unloading as Hunter was going to get today, which meant he had to work a little harder.

What did Shane need?

Did he need to talk it out? Work through it? Retrace his past steps to find out what went wrong?

Hunter stared at him some more, as though the answer would suddenly write itself across Shane's face.

If only.

When the miserable silence continued he opted for some minor prodding before they went to the more drastic measure of hunting Cam down and sitting on him until he explained himself.

"Can you think of anything you might have done-"

And apparently that was enough to start him up again because Shane was on his feet in an instant, hands running through his hair wildly.

"That's just it, I've been thinking about it and I can't-" he cut off, partly from frustration and partly from having to glare at the coffee table for having the audacity to come in the way of his shins. "I was taking care of him!" He exclaimed, negotiating the offending table and making it to the safety of the window, something that probably couldn't hurt him. "I made sure he ate, I made sure he was rested, I made sure he bathed…" and pointing out that treating another person like a pet was probably not the best way to win them over wasn't going to win him any points so Hunter kindly kept that to himself, "I even slept with him so he could-"

"Wait," Hunter interrupted, holding up a warning hand as he pinched the bridge of his nose, "I think I'm beginning to see what the problem is."

It was probably the sex thing.

Hunter wasn't surprised that Shane hadn't thought that the friends-with-benefits thing would turn out badly, but he was allowed to insult him for the next week for not thinking that that ending and Cam's silence had nothing to do with each other. He didn't even want to try to fathom what the dark-skinned teen's end game had been…unless his goal was to get Cam to loosen up, in which case, he failed considerably. The question of exactly how consensual their meet up had been also came to mind, but he pushed it aside for later, because, you know, one thing at a time.

At least that answered the question of Shane's sexuality. And to think, he had been playing so hard to get.

"So," he asked, rubbing the side of his head exasperatedly, "when did the sex start?"

Not that it was entirely relevant but he honestly wanted to know how big a man whore Cam was turning out to be. Sleeping with Shane, making googly eyes at Dustin, flirting with Hunter, it was a good thing Blake was so blatant with his attraction to Tori or he probably would have been pulled into this mess.

Oddly enough, and despite the fact that he and Shane had a silent agreement to be frank with each other, the red ranger's reaction was incredibly odd, with lots of flailing and falling and wild staring. They both blinked in confusion, clearly missing whatever the other was having issue with.

Shane opened and shut his mouth a couple of times, flat-out gaping before he remembered how to use his vocal cords again.

"What?" he asked, indignant, and Hunter rolled his eyes, unimpressed. "What are you talking about?"

Hunter cocked his head sideways, attempting to discern the motive behind Shane's odd reaction.

"The sex," he reiterated, slow and plain so the other wouldn't get confused. He swore talking to Shane was like talking to a puppy sometimes, you had to be extra nice and patient with them just so you could get them to stop peeing on things. And since he was feeling extra generous he went ahead and retraced his mental connections for him. "I'm pretty sure that's what 'I slept with him' translates to, unless of course, you meant you literally slept by him, but even you're not…" and the words kind've dried up in his mouth because holy hell, that was exactly what Shane meant, and then Hunter had to fight off the very tempting urge to throw his soda at his still in-training ranger-puppy.

It didn't help that Shane was still reeling from the sex comment, but Hunter refused to feel any guilt over the damage because he had brought that down on himself.

Okay, maybe there was a little bit of guilt there so Hunter threw out an attempt to distract Shane from his woes.

"You couldn't think of a better way to phrase that?"

Luckily it worked and Shane was glaring at him in no time, picking himself back off of the floor.

"I thought it was obvious," he groused, brushing off some imaginary dust, "I already told you I'm not gay."

Hunter's fingers twitched and he silently evaluated the pros and cons of throwing the soda. Of course Shane wasn't gay, he only let Dustin hang all over him and slept with Cam and never looked at other girls because he was totally a nice guy.

The worst part of that sentence was that it was entirely plausible despite Hunter's doubts. Still, that was a battle for another day.

Right now they were still on the let's-make-Shane-feel-happy train.

"Whatever," Hunter replied, waving a hand vaguely so they could focus on the more important stuff. "How exactly did you come to this…arrangement?"

Because there was no other word for it, he bet Cam even made up flow charts and diagrams and a schedule or something, or worse, Shane did it for him.

This team was so weird.

Shane took a moment to think of it as he settled back onto the couch, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

"I went to check up on him once and found him passed out over his keyboard so I picked him up and took him to his room so he could get some quality sleep." He paused for a moment, eyes staring off at something into the distance, "When I laid him down he wouldn't let go of my shirt, and when I tried to make him let go…" he trailed off, eyes saddening. "He asked me to stay, in his sleep." He turned to look at Hunter, stupidly caring and strong. "He was so lonely Hunter, I just-"

"Couldn't leave him like that?" Hunter offered, trying not to wince at the cliché. It was unavoidable though, Shane was a walking Boy Scout stereotype. It was like the world had overcompensated for all of Lothor's evil by finding as much excess good there could possibly be and stuffing it all into the red ranger, giving him his rainbow glitter charm. It was sickening. Necessary, but gross.

Hunter made a mental note to never get on the other ranger's "to help" list.

Shane nodded, smile in place as though he could read Hunter's thoughts, and the crimson ranger moved on. "And then you kept coming back, whether he wanted it or not?"

Because that was what Shane would do.

"Yeah," he murmured, leaning back.

"But now he has Dustin, so he doesn't need you anymore."

A sadder, more hushed, "Yeah."

Hunter looked at him closely, sensing the defeat. "Do you miss it?"

From what he could tell Shane liked feeling needed and this here, this was the epitome of need. Though beyond that selfish pretense, there was actually a deeper loss. Real mourning over a broken relationship made whatever Shane gained from this experience worthless because at the end of the day, he really cared about Cam. And now not only did Cam no longer need him, apparently he didn't want him either. Or perhaps it was just the opposite, and he wanted him a little too much. Either way that was a conversation he and Cam were going to have to have later.

Meanwhile, outside his head, Shane had started back up again.

"I miss talking to him," he admitted, slowly rubbing the side of his face. "It may have taken awhile, but Cam is my friend."

Though you thought he was your brother, Hunter silently added, achingly familiar with a family in mourning.

Shane laughed suddenly, smirking at Hunter sideways. "I can't believe you thought I was having sex with him."

I can't believe you didn't have sex with him.

It would have made a lot more sense.

Hunter shrugged instead, tilting his head cockily, "It seemed like a reasonable conclusion to draw."

More laughter, "Only because your mind's in the gutter."

Hunter frowned again, tossing another wadded up napkin in the other's direction. He wasn't entirely offended, it seemed the sex shark branding was unavoidable at this point (despite the fact that Cam totally had him beat) so he refused to let it bother him. Besides, it seemed to lift Shane's spirits so he took what he could get. Further progress on this front would be halted until he spoke with Cam, so until then he would have to settle for providing Shane with a happy distraction.

Hunter still wasn't entirely sure why, but it felt right, so he didn't worry over it too much.

It was what friends do, right?

Right.

The fact that this would still trouble him for days to come was also something he shouldn't worry about.

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Endnotes:

In which Cam is declared a man whore, Dustin faces the music, and Hunter's a little o_O.

Yeah…I don't know what happened with Hunter this week but he was a blast to write.

A rainbow full of thank you's to my wonderful reviewers! Feel the squee RAWR, feel it! I can only hope that Hunter instigated the best of flailings this chapter! And even attempting to get other people to read this inspires the utmost lurve. Seriously, LURVE, thank you so much! ValkyrieNyght I'm not going to lie after your awesome review I was almost a little afraid to write this chapter for fear that it wouldn't hold up but y'alls reviews got me to push through. Yes, eventually I'll be doing a Shane/Cam scene but it's probably going to farther down the line after the Hunter/Cam scene and the Dustin/Shane scene, but it will happen. And Rogue, this one's for you buddy…

I got to thinking this "this or that" thing was…limiting. Truth is I like both concepts of (Hunter/Shane, Cam/Dustin) and (Shane/Dustin/Cam) and while I lean towards the first one because of plausibility and the fact that everyone gets a happily ever after, I did lay all the ground work for the later pairing. And because Rogue fought for it so passionately, and I have the time, and I'm kind've sick of scrapping at least half of my ideas, I figured, why not just do both?

So I give you, "Any Moment B". This "B" version is going to stick with the Shane/Dustin/Cam pairing. It will be a completely different story, separate from this one, and it will pick up after the events of this "Any Moment's" chapter 36. So now you can pick your side. Or just do both, it's really up to you. I'll be putting it up shortly after I post this chapter.

I figured as long as I don't get confused it shouldn't be a problem.

In other news the next episode coming up is "I love Lothor" which means we be bringing on the love potions! Since possibilities are endless I was wondering what opinions you guys had. Who should get zapped? Who should they "love"?

Any feedback is appreciated.

Until next time.