Heeeeyyy :D

I'm back again, as you can see. And I had a serious case of writer's block for a while, so that sucked. Anyway, let's start this chapter, shall we?

**Oh look, I still do not own Death Note. What a shame. Also, I make typos. And I am often too lazy to correct them, so if you hate reading stories with typos, you've been warned.

XxX

38. Casualties

I had never been drunk before, but I was quite sure I remembered everything when I woke up.

And I immediately wished that I could forget.

I was actually kind of surprised that I hadn't revealed some really important information to the girls from yesterday. But the most surprising thing of the day…

With my eyes still closed I brought my hands to my lips. I hadn't imagined it, had I? No, no, I was quite sure I hadn't. Ryuzaki had given me a kiss. A small one, yes, so maybe it was more his strange idea of payback. I mean, it would be silly to assume he had me in his arms and saw me and thought to himself that I looked adorable and he just couldn't help himself and—

'Miss Upson, I know you are awake, it's time to get up.'

My eyes shot open and I looked into Watari's face. As I sat up, slowly, I realised that it was unusually silent in the room. No Ryuzaki eating or typing.

I looked around. Ryuzaki wasn't there. And the suitcases were there, standing close to the door.

'We're leaving?' I asked.

Watari nodded. 'Indeed we are, I'm sorry I didn't wake you sooner, Ryuzaki thought it would be best to let you sleep.'

'Oh no, it's fine!' I told him, getting out of bed. I was still wearing my clothes, which was a plus. If Ryuzaki had actually changed me into my pyjamas, or even Watari, hell, I wouldn't be able to look into their eyes ever again. And I was also happy to know that I hadn't taken any clothes off myself. I wasn't sure what kind of drunk I would be.

'Are we leaving – like – right now?' I then asked, as I realised that everything must've been packed already. Including my hairbrush. And my toothbrush, probably.

Watari nodded. 'Ryuzaki is currently in the lobby.'

I nodded, too. 'Okay then. Let's go. May I ask why we're leaving now?'

Wrong. Watari's calm and friendly face fell a bit, but he tried to keep it together. But that expression was enough. Something happened. 'There have been… problems.'

Something was wrong, but I decided not to ask Watari. Ryuzaki would answer me if he felt like it. Which meant that he probably wouldn't answer me, but hey, I could always hope.

Ryuzaki was indeed in the lobby. That is to say, he stood in the corner, near the elevator, his hands in his pockets and he was staring at the hotel's entrance.

'What's wrong?' I asked before Watari could say anything.

Ryuzaki looked at me, then quickly at Watari. 'Nothing of extreme importance at the moment,' he then answered before grabbing my arm and pulling me to his side as he walked to the entrance of the hotel.

That's when I saw them.

Police. A lot of police. And more people. An ambulance, maybe? The café I had sat at with the girls from yesterday was completely surrounded. And as we left the hotel, I saw the poodles of blood and my eyes caught a glimpse of a hand with a familiar looking silver bracelet. One of the girls had had a silver bracelet.

And then Ryuzaki's hand was covering my eyes and turning my head away. 'Don't look.'

That confirmed my suspicions. 'Oh god,' I murmured. And I felt my eyes water up. Problems. Watari had said. Were all the girls dead?

I waited for Ryuzaki to lower his hand from my face a few miles away from the crime scene before I asked questions. 'We need to go back, we're witnesses, they would want us to testify what we saw, right? Oh god…' That bloody hand crept back into my brain and my imagination made the rest bloody bodies, cut open. My fault. Yes, it must be my fault.

Ryuzaki was still holding my arm and was naw caressing it to calm me down. I could see in his eyes that he was waiting for another panic attack. 'We can't go back and testify, Olivia, you know that. We need to leave.'

I was still too paralysed to go against him, so when he pulled me further away from the hotel, I followed without protest. My vision became blurry when my eyes started to tear up. 'Shit,' I said, but it didn't sound convincing. 'He found us.'

'Possibly,' Ryuzaki said, but the fact that he said it and the way he'd said it, told me he meant 'yes.'

XxX

'Yes, I know you busy taking care of the children, but that's why I called you.'

My eyes fluttered open, but closed after. Felt too heavy to keep open.

'No, no, don't do that. Go to the shelter… Yes, the private airplane is available for you... Ah, yes, I understand. Well, tell him that he should listen to my orders if he wishes to remain one of my successors… No, Matt is old enough, if he wishes to leave, you should let him.'

What was this conversation about, for Christ's sake?

'No, she's asleep, I've given her some tranquilizer… No, I won't stay, I'm just going to drop her off… No, Watari stays with you as well. This is something I can handle better alone.'

Alone?

I forced my eyes open. We were in a hotel room, a fancy one, so it seemed. Ryuzaki was standing, walking through the room as he spoke into the phone, sounding tired and even kind of worried. I was sitting in a big chair, and when I looked down, it looked quite fancy. I wasn't sure why he hadn't laid me down on a bed, but I decided not to question that part, because it didn't seem important.

'There's no way he can find that place. And, of course, he will be looking for me, not for you. He knows I won't be with you… No, I won't risk it, I will leave almost immediately.'

I tried to open my mouth and speak, but my mouth was dry and refused to move. Jesus Christ, just what had he given me?

'No, don't tell them anything. Not even Near and certainly not Matt. Just pretend like everything's normal… Yes, I get that, I'll find an excuse for her return.' Ryuzaki looked at me then and saw my eyes were open. He stared at me for a few seconds, after which he looked away and spoke into the phone again. 'Just prepare everything, I'll see you there… Yes, yes I know, I'll try.' His eyes suddenly widened. 'Excuse me? I-I mean, no, I… I'm sorry, I really need to go know… Yes, I understand. Thank you for your trouble.' He hung up the phone and looked back at me with a small sigh.

I tried to speak again, but my mouth still refused.

With a sigh, Ryuzaki walked over to me and grabbed something from the nearby tea table that I couldn't see. He lifted a glass of water to my face. 'You need to drink something, then you'll feel better.'

I managed to open my mouth a bit and Ryuzaki calmly gave me water. This would've made me nervous and kind of happy if I wasn't so worried.

Ryuzaki put down the glass of water again and I decided to give talking one more time. 'You poisoned me.'

'Drugged you, actually,' Ryuzaki corrected with no hint of remorse in his voice.

I rolled my eyes, which became easier. I also felt my hands and feet again, so I moved them a little while I said: 'You're dead.'

He looked back at me, completely confused. 'No, I am not,' he said, frowning.

I laughed and pulled myself up slowly, only to noticed that no, my body was not ready for that yet, and I sunk back down. I tried not to think about what I'd seen earlier, but I knew that was impossible. Still, I pretended I could forget it easily and asked: 'Was that Roger on the phone?'

I could tell from the look on his face that he didn't actually want me to know. Sucks for him, if he really hadn't wanted me to find out, he should've drugged me more. The bastard. 'Yes, it was,' he answered.

'And you are going to dump me and Watari and fight Beyond on your own?'

He opened his mouth, surprised, but I stopped him. 'Which is fine, if you are going to be stubborn and dump me once more, great, I've become used to it.' Big fat lie. 'But you can at least tell me where it is. And where are we?'

'Paris,' he answered.

I looked at him for a while, waiting for the moment he said 'just kidding', but that of course didn't come. 'Paris,' I repeated slowly.

'Yes.'

'As in France?'

'As in Texas, but if you want to go to France, I know a—'

'Stop, stop,' I said, shaking my head and holding my hand up before he started to hold a monologue about France. 'Why are we in Texas, Ryuzaki?'

He smiled, but it didn't seem sincere in the slightest. 'We are taking a different route.'

'To where, exactly?'

He looked at me with an expression that I didn't understand, like I'd made some joke that was really funny, but it was even funnier that I didn't get it. And then he answered, with that same odd smile on his face. 'France.'

XxX

We took two airplanes, one private and one not so private, but we landed in Berlin and took a train to a city in Belgium, after which we took another train to Paris. Then we grabbed a cab to another city and took a bus to a small town.

This all happened with Watari talking to me about absolutely nothing, about movies I liked or shows that I'd watched and then he went on to books when that subject started to bore me. I knew what he was doing. Ryuzaki had obviously instructed him to distract me so that I wouldn't bother Ryuzaki, who was constantly calling people, talking in French, English, Japanese and a language I didn't know. It was quite frustrating to witness how fluent he was in all of those.

I tried to listen sometimes. One in English, that went a little like this: 'Yes, I know you are on leave, that's why I am calling you.' And that turned into a discussion I couldn't follow because Watari wanted to know what my least favourite book was.

Another odd thing was that Ryuzaki changed phones all the time, giving Watari the used ones. I wasn't sure why, but they both didn't give me a chance to ask. I thought Ryuzaki would have his phones completely closed off, so that even the police couldn't catch hold of it.

The town we reached was so small that we were the only ones left in the bus when we got off. As soon as we did and the bus driver was gone, a red, old-looking car, came driving up to the bus stop.

It took we a while before I recognised the driver. 'Olivia!' Hannah said as she rolled the window down. 'Nice to see you again!' Even though it was already becoming dark, she was wearing sunglasses.

'Nice to see you again,' I sounded even more confused than I felt. Not that I was surprised. No, this was what I'd guessed from the information I overheard. Ryuzaki was evaluating the children, meaning that yes, Beyond Birthday knew where the orphanage was. I was probably right, he had been an orphan. So, had he gone crazy? It seemed like an environment where that could easily happen. Mello, Matt and Near all seemed kind of odd. And let's not forget about L. Was it really possible that Wammy's House had produced a serial killer?

I shivered, but no one noticed because everyone was already getting into the car. It took another moment, until we all sat down, until someone noticed.

'Are you okay, Olivia?' Hannah asked. 'You look a bit… pale.'

I looked at her through the mirror and gave her a small smile. 'I'm fine. Someone decided to drug me earlier, that's all.'

'Well, yes, I did,' Ryuzaki said, as if that wasn't already painfully obvious.

'I guessed so,' Hannah said, sounding slightly disapproving. 'Did Roger not tell you about the thing I told him?'

Vague, too vague to understand with the context I had.

'Hmm, he did give me the message,' Ryuzaki mused, looking out of the window. 'And I have decided to momentarily ignore your… opinion until a more convenient time, if you don't mind.'

'Of course, Ryuzaki,' she said, after which she sighed. 'You haven't told us how to address you while the kids are present.'

'Just call me Ryuzaki, I won't be there for long.' I felt like he wouldn't have said that if he hadn't known I'd heard him talk on the phone.

I met Hannah's eyes, who looked saw for some reason. She didn't speak, though. She simply looked away again and started the car.

'Did you prepare the things I asked for?' Ryuzaki asked after a while.

'Yes,' Hannah answered.

Another silence. Then Ryuzaki said: 'I would like to speak with you before I leave.'

Hannah nodded. 'Yes, sir.'

Then, suddenly, Ryuzaki looked at to me. Watari was sitting next to Hannah, while me and Ryuzaki were sitting on the backseat, still as far away from each other as the car allowed. 'And I would wish to speak to you, too, if you don't mind.'

I did mind, but not because of reasons he could think of. I nodded. 'Yes, si—Ryuzaki.'

His eyes narrowed slightly, or maybe that was just my imagination.

It started raining and Ryuzaki looked back out of the window. I decided to do the same. Only to notice, moments later, that Ryuzaki wasn't looking out of the window. In my window, I saw his face reflected, his face dark because of the dim light of the street lights. And he was staring at me.

I sighed and pretended not to notice. Decided to pretend that I wasn't just overthinking this. Pretending that Ryuzaki was actually interested in me.

XxX

When we stopped and got out, it was in the middle of nowhere. There weren't even any street lights here. And there was a building.

It looked like a combination between a farm and a gigantic mansion. Fancy, yet simple. The bricks seemed almost red and the windows where painted a dark green, with white curtains. It looked perfect, like something out of the Sound of Music or something. Almost fairy tale like. I bet it even had a big staircase on the inside.

Almost all the lights were out. Only some on the ground floor were still on, and one at the very top. I also saw a figure behind one of the windows downstairs, probably Roger.

'Let's get in, shall we?' Hannah said, grabbing me by my arm.

'But, the suitcases—' I began, but she interrupted me. 'The guys can handle it,' she said, sounding surprisingly bitter.

'What's wrong?' I asked, annoyed by the lack of context.

'Nothing, sweetheart,' she said, pulling we towards the house. 'I'm sometimes just blown away by the fact that even geniuses can be complete idiots sometimes.'

Before I had the chance to ask what she'd meant, Roger opened the door for us. The light formed a path between us and the doorway and it seemed like Hannah was eager to get inside, because she fastened her pace.

'Good to see you again, Miss Upson,' Roger said as he shook my hand. Something in his words made me shiver.

'Thank you, nice to see you again, too,' I replied, looking into the house. See, I was right! In the entrance hall, where I was standing now, was a gigantic stair, like the one you see in movies. Cinderella could walk down there every minute.

And the carpet was a red so vibrant that it made the room seem warm and inviting. I could already see the children running down this stairs in the morning. And I saw a pile of puzzle pieces in the corner of the room, next to the stairs. One of Near's hiding spots, I guessed.

'Are all the children here?' I asked.

Roger nodded. 'Even Matt decided to come along in the end.'

He thought I knew everything, that much was clear. Good. 'Oh? Didn't he want to at first?'

Roger nodded. 'Mello and some of the others didn't want to go, too, of course. Fleeing to the shelter house means that something big is going to happen, even the children know that.' He sighed, sounded tired. Roger always seemed sort of tired to me. Maybe he just wasn't good with children.

'Okay, Olivia!' Hannah shouted, grabbing my arm again. 'Let me show you to your room!' She pulled me with her before I could react.

But I wasn't stupid. As she pulled me up the stairs, I asked: 'Why are you trying to keep me and Ryuzaki separated?'

She didn't deny it, she wasn't stupid. She shrugged. 'I felt like Ryuzaki should know what it feels like when you walk away from him, for a change. It always seems to be the other way around. I wanted to show him how that is for you.'

I looked down at the floor. I knew it felt very different for me. Ryuzaki probably didn't even care.

Although. To kiss me, there had to be some level of attraction, right? And he stared at me, that was a fact. Still, that wasn't – couldn't – be the same feeling I had. It couldn't.

Hannah didn't notice my sudden mood change, instead, she walked up another stair with me behind her. The red carpet became blue at the highest floor and the lights were brighter, probably because no one was asleep at this floor.

'There is an attic, but it's quite narrow and the only way to get there is through a secret hole in the ceiling,' she told me as we walked through the hallway. 'Roger said that it would only be a matter of time before the children found it, so this floor is forbidden to them. So you have this floor to yourself.'

I froze. 'Seriously?' I asked. It was so… big.

Hannah just kept on walking. 'Well, yes. I mean, Ryuzaki has technically one half of this floor, but he won't be staying with us, so it's—'

'Hannah,' I interrupted her. 'Why am I here?'

She didn't seem comfortable with answering. 'All the children are here,' was her answer, which wasn't an answer at all.

'Hannah,' I pressed. 'I have the right to know.'

She sighed. 'You do, I know, I just think Ryuzaki should tell you this himself.' She looked troubled, but she did open her mouth again. 'The thing is…'

'Yes?'

'Well, we heard what happened. With the girls,' she said with some difficulty.

I shivered and I got goose bumps, but I tried to keep the mental picture out of my head. 'Yes. So?' I asked, not getting the point.

'Well, we already guessed who did it.'

'Yes.'

'And it seems to us that it's… a warning. For him,' she nodded to the stairs, probably referring to Ryuzaki downstairs.

I'd figured out that much. 'And? What kind of warning would justify excluding me from the case and going up against Beyond all by himself?' I crossed my arms to stop my hands from shaking.

'Well, Ryuzaki probably does not want you to know…' She sounded cornered now. It wasn't the real reason. She just really did not want to tell me.

'Hannah?' I said again, a bit nicer this time.

'Yes, I know, I know.' She took a deep breath. 'There was another message found at the crime scene.'

I frowned. 'Really? Another code?'

Hannah shook her head. 'No, no, nothing like that. The message was quite clear, actually.'

'Really?' That seemed odd.

She nodded. 'Yes, Be— he left a message on the girls arms. Two, actually. With black marker, writing on their arms like they were a piece of paper.' Now she was the one who shivered.

'What were the messages, Hannah?' I asked slowly, trying to sound calm while actually freaking out on the inside.

Hannah sighed again, closed her eyes for a short while before looking into my eyes while answering. 'The first message was "why isn't she dead yet?".'

I swallowed, but now my legs were shaking too, and I wasn't sure how to hide that. 'And the second one?'

Hannah pulled a face, then said the following words without looking at me: '"Careful, she could be next."'

XxX

DONE AND DONE (with this chapter)!

Vacation is almost over for me, NOOOOOO

Oh and also, there is a great chance I won't update next week, so be prepared for that. Maybe I will, that is the question, but maybe not. Sorry for the vague notice, but hey, at least now you can prepare yourself for anything, right?

XxX

AuroraStargazers: Hehe oops, not much romance here, but don't worry, it's definitely coming. And yes, I think so? I update every week and I usually finish a chapter on Sunday and I always try to finalise and update it before the week is over, so yes, Sunday is the day I update the most (this may change to Friday once school starts again).

Luna Latanya: I imagine her having a plastic fork and eating it straight from the box, but I indeed realise now that I didn't specify xD And I think BB is pretty smart, so I didn't want him to wait too long. I think he wouldn't wait around, for some reason. I think he would be really curious, too, if there was a woman pretending to be L all of the sudden.

XxX

Bye bye!