Chapter Thirty-Eight: A Little Closer

Esme's talk with Bella didn't seem to have the effect I had hoped for. It had been three days since then and she was holed-up in her room. Jasper told me that her emotions were all over the place, but he thought that might a good thing, at least compared to her previous monotone sadness.

My eyes always seemed to drift to the clock. Every second was more dire than the last. Aro never really specified when he was going send his guards to check on us. Edward was the only other one who knew about the situation, but we never spoke about it. A part of me wanted to tell Bella about the situation, but I knew that I'd just be pushing her into something she didn't want again, pressuring her into a relationship.

Ryan, Edward, and Alice all tried to talk to Bella, but she just told them to go away and that she was thinking. She hadn't even called her stock broker.

A week passed and I was dying from not having seen her in so long. I felt like a love sick puppy as I walked toward her room, but I needed to see her. I knocked on the door and I could hear her shuffling around inside her room.

Bella opened the door. She was dressed in yoga pants and a loose tee, similar to what she used to work out in on a cold day when she was human… I pushed that thought aside.

"Hello Bella."

"Hey Carlisle. What do you need?"

"I just really wanted to see you." I felt awkward and like a teenage boy saying that, but it was the truth. She looked down at her hands and then back to me.

"You should come in." She said, startling me. I nodded mutely and followed her. Her room was dark, only a desk lamp and the covered window illuminating it. Bella grabbed my hand and it felt so damn good just to touch her again. "Can we…" She hesitated.

"Can we what?" I prompted her when she didn't continue and I tried not to get my hopes up.

"Can we just snuggle?" She asked and a bolt of happiness went through me.

"We can do whatever you want to." I smiled at her, trying to be charming and for some reason my thoughts went back to how she used to blush and be so confident, making me feel guilty all over again, but I hid the emotion well.

Bella pulled me onto the bed and I wrapped my arms around her as we laid down. She put her head on my shoulder and her scent engulfed me. I could feel her fingers grip my shirt as I buried my nose in her hair. I've wished so many times to be in bed with her, holding her.

We laid like that from what could have been anywhere between a minute and a day before she spoke again.

"I love you." She whispered.

"I love you too."

"But… I hate, I hate how I'm only happy when I'm around you." I tried not to show my mixture of sadness and happiness. As depressing as that was it gave me a little thrill knowing how much I meant to her. "I don't want my happiness to hinge on the presence of someone, even if that someone is you." I didn't know what to tell her.

"I'm sorry?" I said a few minutes later.

"Don't be." She nuzzled against me and my heart soared.

What do you think of this scene? Did they make progress?