Amy adjusted her seat back and peered around her husband to get a view of the clouds. They were on their way home, and she had mixed feelings about it. A small part of her was relieved that she would sleep in her own bed tonight and they would go back to their routines, but she would miss her dad's side of the family immensely.
It had been a tearful goodbye with individual and group hugs. She held her niece and nephews tightly, knowing they would grow so much before she saw them again. Her dad and siblings promised to keep in touch via texts and FaceTime, but it wasn't the same. Tears threatened to fall again, and she dabbed at her eyes with her sleeve.
Sheldon touched her hand. "You okay?"
"I'm fine," she sniffled. "I should probably use the restroom before the beverage cart gets to our row."
Leah obediently set down her book to stand up and let her out. Even with two restrooms on either side of the back of the plane, a short line had formed, and Amy tapped her foot impatiently. When it was finally her turn, she slipped into the tiny space. As she sat down, the tears flowed freely.
The visit had not gone perfectly, but there had been plenty of good times. Through her tears she smiled as images of her family sharing dinner, opening gifts, and frolicking in the snow played on a loop. It was wonderful to be part of a larger family. She enjoyed bonding with her siblings and watching Leah play with her cousins. If only they could experience it more often. If only the circumstances had been different.
An unexpected jolt of turbulence caused her to instinctively reach her hands out to steady herself.
"They sure don't leave people much room," she muttered to herself, as she noted she could simultaneously touch the door and the sink. She shook her head at the absurdity of it. Couldn't the manufacturers increase the size of these even a little?
She tried not to think about how her parents had somehow fit into such a confined space. How did they stand up together, let alone engage in amorous activities? She stood and spun around slowly, barely able to move without touching anything.
A knock sounded at the door, and she jumped. "Amy, are you okay? The cart is coming."
She opened the door a crack and peered at her husband. "I need another minute." He turned to leave, but she grabbed his hand and hauled him back. "Actually, I need your help."
"With what?"
"Just get in here."
He looked around wildly. "Amy!" He hissed. "What will people think?"
"Please," she begged.
"There's not enough room for both of us."
"There has to be." He tried to struggle out of her grasp. "Sheldon, please get in here before you make a scene."
He reluctantly stuffed himself into the space, barely able to close the door behind him. "What is going on?"
"I... I had to know how it was physically possible for my parents to... you know."
"Oh, dear Lord!" He murmured. "It's only been 12 hours. Your sexual appetite is insatiable."
"We don't have to actually do it. I just want to figure out how it was even possible." A tear trickled down her cheek.
"Amy, what's wrong? You're so emotional today. I know it's not your time of the month yet, and you can't be pregnant."
She decided to let his comment slide. "I need to know because... why did they have to..." Her voice trailed off as she sobbed against his chest.
Sheldon rested his head on hers and rubbed her back as best as he could. His back was pressed against the door, and her lower body was pressed up against the sink, yet they were so close to each other that it would have been impossible to slip a sheet of paper between them. "Why the tears?" He asked.
"I miss them already."
"I know you do." He kissed the top of her head. "But how does that explain why are we packed into an airplane bathroom?"
"Isn't it obvious? I shouldn't have to travel 3000 miles just see my dad. Had my parents actually had a relationship instead of selfishly giving into their sexual needs, I could have lived a normal, happy childhood with both my parents. My mother would have had more time for me, and maybe she wouldn't have been so harsh if she had gotten laid more regularly." She clenched her hands into his sleeves and sobbed harder, soaking through the front of his shirt.
"Amy!"
"We both know how the chemicals in the brain release endorphins with orgasm. How could that not relieve some of her... her crotchetiness?"
Sheldon ran his hands over her shoulders. "I know the situation is not ideal, and some aspects of your life may have been better..."
"More than just some," she sputtered. "I truly believe I would have had a happy childhood if they had talked afterward and actually gotten to know each other. They must have had chemistry, however briefly, or I wouldn't be here today. We would have been a real family. It's just not fair!" She screamed.
"Amy," he murmured into her hair in a soothing voice, "I know your emotions are running high, but please try to think logically."
She tried to back away but was trapped against the counter. "Logic!" She spat out, fists clenched at her sides. "There is more to life than logic! That's all you ever think about."
"Amy, you know that's not true. I'm not the robotic man I once was."
She sagged against him. "I know. I'm sorry for taking out my frustrations on you."
"I'm sorry too. I should have chosen my words more carefully. What I meant to say was the path you are on in life would not have happened if your childhood had been different. You may not have been as determined to follow your dreams as a scientist if your mom hadn't been so resistant to the idea of a female obtaining a doctorate degree."
"You're not helping."
He tipped her chin up and looked into her eyes. "Then think about us. Amy, had your parents been together, your life would have been so different that you and I probably never would have met. I'd still be a bachelor living in the Los Robles apartment, making Leonard's life a living hell."
"You would have found someone else," she sniffled.
"No. You are my only exception. I have never known anyone as intriguing as you. From the moment we met, you turned my world upside down. You were so patient and kind. Other than my family, no one else ever tried to get too close to me. Early on in our relationship, I felt like I didn't deserve you. I was such a pain in the A, but you loved me in spite of that."
She buried her head in his chest. "Oh, Sheldon."
"It's true. You saved me from the monster I had become."
"You were never a monster."
"You're upset, so let's just agree to disagree." He lifted his head and peered over her shoulder into the mirror. The curve of her hunched shoulders stared back at him sadly. "I know how rough your childhood was, but it made you who you are today - a brilliant scientist, the best wife any man could ever ask for, and a wonderful mother. Would you really want to change that?"
"No. I love our life together, but right now, I feel like I don't deserve you," she sobbed.
They stood clinging to each other wordlessly for several minutes. When her tears ran dry, she reached down and blindly groped for the toilet paper then leaned back slightly over the sink to blow her nose and dab at her eyes. "I'm going to wash up then get back out there. Thank you for... everything."
When he didn't respond, she looked up to find him staring behind her. "What?"
"The sink."
She furrowed her brow. "What about it?"
"That might be how it's done."
"How what's done?"
"How people engage in coitus in such a compact space. It would, at the very least, help with the floor space."
Before she knew what was happening, he squeezed his hands between her waist and the countertop and lifted her up. She watched curiously as he angled his body toward hers, titling his pelvis to and fro.
Without warning, another jolt of turbulence shook the plane, and she braced her hands on either side of the sink. Sheldon stumbled against her, his pants zipper connecting with her skirt a few inches below the waistline.
"I think you might be right," she agreed.
He lifted his eyes to hers, and by an unspoken agreement, their lips met in a gentle kiss. Amy cradled his face in her hands, feeling the barely-there stubble against her soft skin, as Sheldon threaded his fingers in her hair. More turbulence shook the plane, and they froze as an announcement blared over the loudspeaker asking passengers to return to their seats and fasten their seatbelts.
"Go on," she urged him. "I'm going to splash some water on my face. I'll be out soon."
"Okay." He kissed her quickly, fumbled for the door latch behind him, and returned to his seat.
Amy slid off the counter and spun around to stare at the mirror. Not even cold water would remove the blotchy red patches on her face, but it would have to do. She peeked out into the aisle, straightened her skirt, and held her head high as she returned to her seat.
xxx
Leah consulted her watch. Her parents had been gone a few minutes. She had seen her mom's tears and worried when her dad went to check on her and still hadn't returned. She briefly thought about going back there to make sure everything was okay, but her dad had asked her to order him a diet Coke if he hadn't returned before the beverage cart arrived.
She unbuckled her seatbelt and twisted around in her seat. Her dad wasn't even in the aisle. She figured he had decided to use the restroom too, though she knew he loathed to relieve himself on any moving vehicle. Maybe instead of worring, she could take advantage of this time alone to read the diary.
She reached under her seat and unzipped her backpack. Her hand dug to the bottom where the diary hid below other books and some snacks Grandma Annette had sent home with her. She glanced back to the restrooms again. Still no sign of her parents. It was still risky, knowing they could come out at any moment, but she was fairly confident she could pull it off without them knowing. She quickly flipped through the pages until she found what she was looking for.
November 22, 2018
I don't know why I was so nervous waiting for Dad to call. I had sent him an email at work this morning asking him to Skype me at 9 p.m. eastern. I had hoped it would give me enough time to get home and maybe scarf down a sandwich while not being too late for him. The 3-hour time zone difference makes it so difficult to connect during the week, and I didn't want to wait any longer.
The call came through right on time. He asked if I was alright because we normally just communicate through email, with the occasional FaceTime on weekends. I assured him everything was fine. Sheldon joined me on the couch and squeezed my hand as I gave Dad the news. He blinked rapidly, and we waited patiently as he fully absorbed the information. I was relieved when his face lit up.
He called Annette over, and she congratulated us. I still feel a little strange talking to her. Maybe if I had known her as a child, I'd be used to the fact that my dad had moved on from my mom. Who am I kidding? There was nothing to move on from. They never even dated. Until 22 months ago, he had no way to contact her even if he wanted to. I should be glad he got on with his life, and I am, but the little girl in me still longs for my parents to be together.
Leah jumped when a hand clasped her shoulder. "I'm back. Can you let me in?"
She quickly stuffed the diary into the seat pocket. Her eyes darted around nervously as her dad took his seat and sent her a tiny smile. He seemed preoccupied, and she breathed a sigh of relief. Her mom returned soon after, her eyes red rimmed. Normally she would have asked what was wrong, but she sensed her mom wasn't up to a discussion. Instead Leah leaned over the arm rest and lay her head against her shoulder, hoping to provide some comfort.
xxx
"I missed southern California's balmy temperature," Sheldon sighed happily, as they exited LAX and made their way to the taxis. He tossed their luggage in the trunk and informed the driver of their destination as the trio squeezed into the backseat.
Leah leaned forward to view the city lights. They didn't drive through this part of the Greater LA area very often, so it was almost like seeing it for the first time. It wasn't until they turned onto E Colorado Boulevard that she began to recognize the familiar sites of Pasadena - the pizza place they frequented, the coffee shop where her parents had met, a stationary store featuring a display of diaries in the window...
"We have to go back!" The little girl panicked.
"Monkey, we'll be back in Boston this summer."
"Not Boston, the airport."
Sheldon frowned. "Why on earth would we go back there?"
"I forgot a book on the plane."
"A school book? I know they're expensive, but we can afford to buy you a new one," Amy reassured her.
"It's not a school book."
"The same rule applies to any book. We'll just buy you a new one."
"This book is not something you can buy."
"Amazon and other sites sell out of print books. I'm sure we can find a copy," Sheldon soothed.
The little girl shook her head vehemently. "You don't understand."
They pulled into the driveway and paid the driver. Leah crossed her arms over her chest and refused to budge.
"Leah Marie Cooper, you need to get out of the car now so this poor man can get to his next customer," Amy advised.
"We have to go back," she whined, as Sheldon unbuckled her and carried her out of the vehicle. She squirmed in his arms, but he didn't let her down until the car was out of sight.
"Someone's crabby and ready for bed," he determined.
"No!"
"Leah! We taught you better than to talk back," Amy scolded.
"But the plane..."
"I'm sure it's already on the way to its next destination. Tomorrow we'll get you a replacement book," Sheldon promised as he unlocked the door.
Leah stood on the steps looking out into the night sky as her parents hauled the luggage in. The diary could be on its way back to Boston.
Why hadn't she shoved it back in her backpack instead of the seat pocket? Now someone would probably find it and read all about her mom's life. She sent a little prayer up to Meemaw Mary's God that the flight attendants found it first and brought it to the airport's lost and found, but even if they had, how would she retrieve it? Asking her parents to drive her to the airport without admitting exactly what she lost was out of the question.
She trudged into the house, removed her outerwear, and hung it neatly. She couldn't even look at her parents as she passed by. They were disappointed in her for throwing a fit and rightfully so. It was out of character, but she had panicked and hoped they would sense her urgency.
For the first time in her life, she went to bed without waiting for story time or being tucked in. She screwed her eyes shut and hoped sleep would come quickly. Maybe the extra rest would come with the bonus of finding a solution to her dilemma.