Bucky's POV
Looking over at the city with a sigh. Cities are burning riots are breaking out across the country. And Kyra's out there somewhere. I know I've got work to do. We've got bad guys to stop. The country to save. But without her by my side, it just doesn't seem as important.
"You ready to go Barnes?" Natalia interrupts my thoughts.
"As ready as I'll ever be I guess."
"Don't sound so excited." glaring blankly at the red head.
"I'm not excited. I shouldn't be here." tracing the edge of the shield, a heavy weight on my heart.. "This should be in Steve's hands, not mine." running my free hand through my hair, tugging slightly. I can feel her flinch. She cared for the punk too. Hell everyone did.
"We can only do what Steve would have wanted." her voice a lot more maternal than I ever remember
"I know." eyes unfocused as the list of responsibilities I've picked up spool through my mind. "And he'd want me to be protecting the country. The world. But he'd also want me with Kyra, he'd want her here with me. Shit I want her here with me."
"Last time I checked in you didn't want to find her."
"You were right."
"I know that." waltzing towards the jet with a smirk. "Get your head right Barnes. You've got time for a pity party after the mission."
"Compassion is not your strong suite Romanova."
"Stop whining." groaning I slump into the quinjet.
"I find it interesting that the first real mission I have you're here. Did Stark forget our agreement?"
"I'm here to fly you in, and back you up. That's it." she starts strapping into the cockpit. I hang back, gripping the support bar waiting for take off. " According to all documentation, you don't exist. Do you know the backlash Tony would face if your deal was made public?"
"Probably wouldn't be pretty."
"That's putting it mildly." Scoffing as she led us across New York. "What changed?"
"Hmm?"
"With Kee Kee, what changed?"
"I got scared. Scared that she wasn't actually safe. Called Fury, she's with him."
"Wait a minute." Natalia's voice dropping dangerously. "You had Fury's number the whole time and didn't contact her?" shuffling around without really answering. Luckily she can't hit me from the cockpit.
"I told you why."
"You gave me a bullshit excuse." rubbing the back of my neck sheepishly. Not really wanting to get into an argument with the Black Widow.
"You say tomato." with a scoff she starts mumbling in Russian.
"This conversation is not over." rolling my eyes but biting my tongue. I am going to need back up. Maybe she'll help me find Kyra.
"How do you play into this then?"
"Play into what?"
"This, how'd you get the clearance to help a multinational fugitive?"
"I'm the Black Widow. I do what I want." snorting at the arrogant smirk on her face. "besides, my little sister loves you." her voice softening drastically. We fall into a heavy silence till she touches the jet down.
Natalia moves to the back hatch, checking over her weapons. "I didn't know Captain America carried guns." Cocking the 44 in my hand glancing over my shoulder.
"Steve didn't carry guns. I always have. And considering the fact that I just painted a red white and blue target on my back, I'm probably going to need them more than ever."
"Fair enough." We were loaded, eyes closed trying to breath away the nerves. "You ready?" Glancing up at Natalia, her hand's on the hatch release. With a heavy sigh and a nod we took off running.
Kyra's POV
I've spent every waking moment monitoring satellite feed since I spoke to Frosty. Watching his every move. It hasn't been easy, but I know how he thinks, so that makes things easier. I was even able to throw a few Cap-Killers off his trail. I haven't felt this useful in ages. I almost forgot what it felt like.
He's flying with Tasha, somewhere. Seeing them together makes my heart clench. Nick has been sitting with me most of the time. Monitoring the news and riots and political bullshit sweeping across the nation. People are such fickle beings. It's a targeted attack on the nation. Taking down our society. Making America self destruct. I wish it were more difficult. The Skull is making it look so effortless. Then again fear does that to people. It's the most powerful weapon out there. Blinking back to focus, Bucky and Natasha are cutting through AIM soldiers like tissue paper. There's no audio, but I can see them falling, only imagine their cries. They should be crying. They're all going to pay.
"Kyra, calm down." Wanda's voice jolting me from my thoughts.
"I'm calm." replying evenly, hardly glancing from the screen.
"Uh huh, my command room says otherwise." glancing over at Nick, all of his books and papers are spread around the room. Looking around to find, i'm standing in the epicenter of the mess. His pointed glare does little to jar my nerves. Mumbling out a half sincere apology before turning back to the screen. Wanda slips her hand in mine, rubbing my knuckles soothingly.
Bucky moves across the screen with ease. There's hesitation each time he throws the shield, but he handles it well enough. Seeing the weapon fly around almost hurts. Because it's Steve's shield. Watching it ricochet off of the enemy with ease. For half a second I forget just where we are. And expect to see it attach to a familiar dark blue sleeve. That isn't the case though.
Even in the dark you can see the difference between Bucky's suit. The blue is brighter. Almost a scale like material. His build is different too. Maybe it's because I know his body inside and out. Hopefully the enemy can't tell. Masks are helpful that way. Watching each move, a blast shoots across the screen, a splatter leaving his leg. Quickly Buck dispatches the rest of the enemies, but I can hardly breath.
"He's hurt."
"Kyra he's fine" Nick's annoyance is hard to miss, but I don't really care.
"He's bleeding."
"Kyra. успокойся."
"Нет. Он нуждается во мне."
"Kyra, Natasha is there with him. He's fine."
"It shouldn't be her, it should be me."
"Kyra calm down."
"No. No I'm not calming down he got shot!"
"Ee's been shot plenty of times before. Ee is alive no?"
"Shut the hell up Maximoff." ignoring Nick as he ran his hands up and down his face. nodding to myself repeatedly. Fuck a cat and mouse game. Fuck Natasha. I need to be there.
"I'm going." Standing up with some difficulty. "His place is in Brooklyn right?"
"Kyra. I can't let you do that." Whipping around to snarl at the older man.
"Nick you can't fucking stop me." Baring my teeth in a feral fashion.
"Kee kee." sighing in exasperation. "You are 7.5 months pregnant."
"And the father of my child is hurt."
"Kyra calm down. Think of the baby."
"My baby is safe, his father is not."
"You really going to hit him with all this now?"
"He's distracted because of me. If he sees me he won't be so distracted."
"He has no idea he's going to be a father." Nick is standing tall above me. Scolding with every ounce of authority he has. "If you think that's not going to mess with his mind you're crazy." and he's right. Bucky has no clue. And that's my fault. He has no idea he's going to be a father. Because I haven't told him. He could have died tonight and would have never known. Tears pool from fear and guilt. There's no use in shaking them away. Turning towards Pietro determination taking over. Or is it desperation.
"Pietro. You're taking me to his apartment. You're doing it now."
"I do not vink vat is vise Kee Kee."
"I can't exactly call a cab now can I?"
"More stubborn then your father. I'll get you a damn car."
"Ve are coming vith you." Wanda speaking up finally.
"This is between me and James."
"You vill not do this alone." Looking from my concerned sister, smiling down at my son. Voice soft and sure, For the first time in ages.
"I'm not."
Bucky's POV
Not the most successful mission, but everyone was stopped. No one died. Natalia called in SHIELD and started to work on getting the information we'll need for our next step. I can't believe I got shot. Fucking rookie mistake. Natalia stitched me up well enough. But it cut me right across my thigh. It's going to take a couple days before I'll be back up and running. Hopefully the world doesn't end, I'm no good limping like a kicked dog. Shouldering my door open, throwing down my suit and shield in frustration. Switching on the lights to the apartment above my gym. Thank god it's an empty building in a shit neighborhood. Makes noise complaints irrelevant. Leaning against the kitchen counter kicking away my shoes, holding myself up with the metal arm. Too tired to support my own weight. The thing has it's moments of usefulness. I need to lay down for an hour or two. Limping passed my bedroom, towards the couch. The bed is too empty without Kyra. I can't sleep on the damn thing. At least strewn on the couch I'm able to get a bit of sleep. Groaning lowly as another twinge of pain shoots up my leg. Looking down at the bandage with distaste, leaning on the door frame. A shuffle of fabric on my couch catches my attention. They couldn't have found me already god dammit. Reaching for the gun under my belt slowly before flipping on the lights. Meeting big golden eyes, rimmed red and a pale tear stained round face. My lungs clench close as my hand tremors. Jaw hanging open, I can't have lost that much blood. I shouldn't be hallucinating.
"Uh...hey." she half waves while fidgeting in place. She's here…. A coffee table, couch, recliner and lamp are the only things separating me and the woman I love. Throwing that stupid shit out of the way in seconds I've got her back in my arms. Slamming my lips into hers. Pressing as hard as I can. Putting everything I have into the kiss. Because there isn't a thing in the world that I can say. Nothing is enough. She yanks me in closer half standing, half sitting. Fingers threaded in my hair, gripping to my head and neck to keep steady. Hands moving from her cheeks to the small of her back. Pulling her closer. Tears painting both of our faces. My lungs scream for air, but my heart doesn't care. I need her. And she's here. Finally she pushes me back slightly. Resting her forehead against mine. Eyes red and tears flowing freely. Panting her breath fans on my face. She has bags under her eyes, her cheeks are thin and flushed. But she's mine. You have to be mine. Drowning in her exhilarating scent, feeling her clammy skin against mine. My heart thunders in the silence, almost overpowering our ragged breathing. adrenaline pumping through my veins, crooked smile on my lips. An unknown source of confidence have my mouth moving before my brain can catch it.
"Marry me."
"What?" Her eyes widen staring straight into mine like a deer in headlights. Cursing silently at my stupidity. My own eyes wide, it's too late now though. Can't fucking think tonight can you Barnes?
"Marry me." my voice softer, more desperate. All of the confidence her lips provided vanishing the second she moves back.
"J-James." My stuttered name falling from her lips sounds perfect and disastrous all at once. Filled with fear. Her shock halting all thought process. My brain stopping, and my mouth moving a mile a minute.
"I wanted to do romantic, I wanted it to be perfect, but I can't wait another second." Her eyes were softening, glowing. Mine searching hers desperately. Begging. "I want you to be my wife. I want to spend every possible second of the rest of my life with you."
"Buck." It's hardly a whisper but I still hear her over the rushing of blood in my ears.
"Hold on hold on. I can at least do this part right." Gently pushing her back onto the couch. Taking her left hand, bending at the knee slowly. Till the stitches pull apart and my useless limb buckles. Collapsing down to the ground and knocking my elbow into my bruised ribs in one ungraceful movement..
"Bucky!" she kneels down with me in one movement. Cupping my face with her hands.
"Fuck, apparently not." Gasping in pain, Shaking her away, muttering softly. "course I fuck this up too. Dammit." groaning as I shift to lean on my good leg, struggling to support myself. "Kyra Odette Stark." Reaching forward with my human hand, pushing hair from her face, then pulling away. "If you marry me, we won't be safe. Ever." Her eyes are filled with so much at once. I can't read them. "Or normal. I can't be the husband you deserve. I can't be the man you deserve." running my hand through my sweat filled hair. Realizing just how horrible I smell. Too late now. "There will be fighting and late nights. Bruises, missions, and a lot of blood." hanging my head in shame.
"Yeah well what else is new?" her voice is soft, bitter almost.
"But I'll love you." glancing up through my lashes. Tears in my eyes. Confusion flashes across her face. And my brain stops functioning again. " I'll love you either way honestly. I couldn't stop if I tried." Shut up. "I love you with every breath." Stop talking. Let her say something. "Shit even Winter loves you." Don't bring him into this you moron. "You're my everything. I just." Jesus christ, what happen to smooth Barnes? This is pathetic! "Oh god I fucked this up." Burying my head in my hands cursing every ounce of my existence. Unable to meet her eyes. Unable to face the pending rejection. I can't. I can't loose her.
But you're going to you sick fuck. You're bleeding and smelly and you propose now? Now? of all times! You don't even know if she's still mad!
Gentle hands pull mine away, her face hovering close to my own, lips moving in for the kill. God please don't let this be a goodbye kiss. Cupping her neck closer, desperate for her touch and taste. If this is the last time, I need to memorize every sensation. Burn it into my memory so deep even HYDRA couldn't wipe it away. She pulls away again, a tear streaming down my face, eyes still closed. Unable to look. If I keep 'em closed maybe it'll go away? There's a heavy silence in the room. She doesn't move, and I'm pretty sure I can't. My leg is throbbing like it's on fire, the stitches are tearing away, it's going to be a son of a bitch to patch up. My heart's in my stomach and my stomach's in my throat and I'm choking on air terrified to move.
"You at least have a ring right?" Eyes snapping open at her perfect face, she's smirking at me. Smirking.
"W-what?"
"An engagement ring?" a smile painting on her swollen lips. Something distinctively her. "You got down on one knee. So I just assumed." gaping like an idiot and nodding quickly.
"L-l-left pocket." She moved her hands away from my face, but I can't bring myself to let her go. I don't know if I'll ever be able to. Her fingers dig into my thigh, shifting awkwardly, trying to make it easier for her to grab the box but not tear my wound open any more. She finally pulls it free. Moving back, resting on her knees before me. Slipping out of my grip. Panicking at the loss of contact I instinctively lean forward. She smiles up at me before flipping the box open. All of the color drains from her face, as her jaw falls open and my heart shatters.
"My mother's….." there's no smile on her lips, tears flow once more as the box trembles in her hands. "how?"
"Tony." swallowing hard, leaning away myself, dejected. " We made peace. He knows I'm the new Captain. Cleared HYDRA out of my head." Her eyes not moving from the velvet box in her hands. "He admitted he was wrong. And gave me his blessing to marry you..." Her wide golden eyes meet mine, lips parted and a new glow showing in them.
"Y-you asked for h-his blessing?"
"I'm from the forties doll." shrugging half heartedly. "It's the way we did things back then."
"And he said yes?" her voice somewhat desperate. For what I'm not sure.
"Yeah, I wouldn't lie to you babe." My heart hardly beats as I stare at the goddess who holds my heart in her hands. My happiness. Everything. She stares at the box, crying harder, shaking softly, before nodding softly. A choked laugh breaking the silence before she stares up at me, nodding faster. Gaping like a fish out of water, my body stops functioning. She said yes… She said yes?
"You gonna put the damn ring on me or not?" her voice snapping me out of my daze, laughing myself, taking the ring out,
"Yeah. Yeah." hands shaking, gently pushing it onto her left ring finger. The ring gets caught on her second knuckle. Eyes furrowed in confusion. She says yes and the damn ring doesn't fit?! "he said it was your size." glancing up desperately. How else can I fuck this up huh? God please don't take it back. A smile spreads across her face, she laughs. Laughs.
"Oh yeah Helen said my fingers were gonna be swollen. Here." taking her hands away to the back of her neck. A soft click can be heard as she pulls a metal chain out of her shirt. "Put it on here." Taking the end offered to me, cradling the necklace curiously. Tracing the rusted steel lettering.
"My tags?"
"Mmhmm"
"You kept them?" laughing again, as I slipped on the ring, a soft ting sounding as it hit my metal tags.
"Why wouldn't I Buck?"
"I- I don't know." Her hands pull my face to hers, as her lips move against mine something finally clicks. She isn't leaving me. She said yes. She really said yes. Pulling her in closer desperate for as much contact as possible. Overwhelmed with her and the hope she brings to every aspect of my life. Wait a second. "Wait Helen said?" eyes wide, pulling away in fear. "Are you sick?" Looking over her face, instinctively bringing her in as much as I can.
"No, no I'm not sick." laughing she wrapps her arms around my neck, straddling my waist, pressing my hand on her back, I pull her closer, but after an inch or so, something stops us. My head resting in her neck. Cautiously trying to pull her forward again. It's a pillow right? But the obstruction feels firm. It's under her shirt.
"Kyra." cautiously sitting back. "Darlin' I know no woman ever wants to be asked this, but have you gained weight?" an electric smile lights up her face. She takes my human hand, placing it on her firm stomach.
"As a matter of fact I have." Eyes widening in confusion before something starts to move. under her fucking shirt. Tearing it up over the bulge. Her milky skin stretched taught over a very pronounced bump. Tracing my hand over the lump, it moves again. She gently places her hands on mine. Looking up at her, she is absolutely glowing. Nodding softly.
"You're pregnant." staring back down at the moving bulge.
"Well we're pregnant." Her voice is soft and happy.
"H-How?"
"Well when a man loves a woman very much sometimes they-"
"Kyra I know how it happens" giggling softly at my outburst smiling brightly.
"Well you asked." staring back down at her stretched stomach in awe. "I went to Nick, to follow up on a lead. He called in Peit and Wanda to come take care of me." her voice soft and sweet. Grating my nerves at the thought of that Slovokian punk taking care of my girl instead of me. Tensing subconsciously, she shook off whatever thoughts moving in her head, eyes meeting mine again. "Anyway she felt him moving around in there. Nick called in Helen and sure enough, we've got a rambunctious little boy growing in there."
"It's a boy?" dazed and confused, ready and willing to believe anything she has to say.
"Yeah. I already picked his name. I don't think you'll mind it though."
"Steven Grant Barnes?" Smiling sadly at the thought of how Steve won't be here to meet our son.
"No." Looking up at her, confused. Her eyes look kind of nervous. "Grant Edward Walter Barnes."
"That's a mouth full." Not sure how to feel about that.
"You're one to talk, Buchanan." rolling my eyes at her sassy smirk.
"Ha ha." voice flat. Turning back to our growing son. Her hands trace my own in slow patterns.
"Besides. Boy is already a hand full. I want him named after the four men who have meant the most to me." tears prick at my eyes as her voice softens. "Because believe it or not, this little jitterbug of a baby means more." The bump, our son, starts moving all the more. All the air leaves the room as everything crashes down on me.
"I'm gonna be a father."
"You already are."
"We're going to be parents." a wide smile meeting her own.
"I know."
"Holy shit…" too many emotions moving through my brain at one to make sense of anything. Shit this morning I was the Winter Soldier. Now I'm Captain America, a fiancee and a father.
"So you aren't mad right?"
"Mad?" pulling away from her in disbelief. Staring hard as she timidly fiddles with the edge of her shirt.
"Yeah, I mean... we never really talked about kids."
"Cause I don't deserve them. I don't deserve this. You. Happiness." shaking away the tears that were pooling in my eyes. Cupping her face, pulling her in for a short sweet kiss. Cutting off the rebuttal she was forming. "I know. You believe in me. Trust me sweetheart I know. I think you're out of your head." smiling down at her worried expression as it shifted to a glare. "But I know." voice softening "For Christ's sake Kyra. You're giving me a son. You're agreeing to put up with my shit for the rest of our lives. Doll you're giving me everything." Closing my eyes, resting my forehead against hers. Just letting it all sink in. Elated. "You're fucking pregnat. I can't believe it. We're going to have a family." breathing out the words like a prayer before nuzzling closer. Absorbing as much of her scent as possible. Terrified but excited at the same time. Thinking over everything. The woman I love is going to marry me. And we're going to have a son. Feeling complete for the first time in what felt like years. It felt like years because you walked out on her. Color draining from my and body stiffening. "You're pregnant and I left you."
"Way to bring down the mood Buck." her playful voice stung more than the guilt. She's laughing it off, like it doesn't matter. Pulling away. Welcoming the self disgust with open arms. How can she always do this? Forgive me. Love me. What kind of a shit father walks out on his soon to be wife and child. "Hey. Hey don't James. Please don't." tears finally pouring down my face. Agony and guilt wracking my bones. Her tiny hands pull me closer brushing away my tears. eyes desperate.
"God how can you ever forgive me?" I ask in a small pathetic voice.
"The ring is a good start." smirking her trademark smirk. Looking through my eyelashes with miserable eyes, her face growing somber. "Making peace with Tony is even better." Voice dropping as she presses a soft kiss on my grimy forehead. Pulling away a fraction. "If you could not leave again, I'd appreciate it though." the fear in her voice is poorly masked by her attempt at humor. She shouldn't be joking about this anyway.
"Never again." Voice hard. She jolts from the intensity. I don't know why she's surprised. Does she really not know, how much I love her? "I'd rather die."
"Don't you dare do that James. Cause I'm pretty terrified right now and in desperate need of you wrapped around me."
"I'll hold you till the end of time, if you'll let me."
"That sounds like heaven." shifting her legs over my own, making sure to avoid pressure on my new wound. The coffee table supporting my back enough to keep my upper body from cramping. resting her head against my chest as we're splayed together on the ground. finally breathing again. Both of us staring down as our son moved around inside her.
"I love the name by the way." pushing my lips against her forehead. Trying to force through as much love as I possibly could.
"Me too." her smile lights up the world as we sit in silence. Just being together. Being close. Taking in all the contact we can. Both desperate and deprived. Humming our song softly to our son, her breathing starts to even out with my own and for a moment the world isn't ending anymore. There aren't fires burning down our city's. Riots demanding a twisted form of justice. No expectations. Just us. Just joy. Just love.
Hiiiiiii!
No ETA for the next chapter. This one isn't edited fully so sorry for any grammatical mistakes.
As always, let me know what you think!