My notes: Glad you like the previous chapter. :) What can you expect from this - Lorelai understood about Rory; Jess and Rory arrived in Stars Hollow; dramatic conversation; is the old Jess's back? Enjoy reading! :)

Story: Four years after Philadelphia, Rory and Jess meet again. (In my story that night ended different. Keep that in mind.)This time in Stars Hollow for Luke and Lorelai's wedding. Each of them keep a secret. Secret, that can change a life.

Chapter 38 Promises

When Lorelai came to pick them up in the next morning she saw Jess sitting on his bed, fully dressed and watching sleeping Rory. Something in his eyes frightening her. They looked so sad and so desperate. Something happened. Lorelai could felt that.

'Jess?' she called him quietly.

There was no reaction at first. Lorelai thought that he was not heard her, but suddenly Jess turned at her direction.

'She's sleeping.' He said. 'She hasn't slept well last night.'

Lorelai closed to him.

'Why? What happened?'

Jess inhaled slowly as he is fighting with the words.

'We were at the gynaecologist yesterday.' Lorelai noticed how he grabbed the sheets in his fists. She put one calming hand on his shoulder. Jess continued. 'She felt pain and there was a bleeding. She almost lost the baby…'

'Oh, my…'

'The baby is okay now, but her condition is very delicate.' Jess released the sheets from his fists and ran fingers through his hair. 'She had nightmares almost all night and I couldn't help her!'

'Jess…' Lorelai did not know what to say.

'It breaks my heart.' Jess whispered and Lorelai trembled of his voice. Jess really changed. His 'old version' never would have dared to say something like this. It was too personal. Now, Lorelai could feel his pain. He could not hide it. 'It breaks my heart that I can't help her!' he repeated loudly.

'Jess, you have to be strong now.' Lorelai said with calming voice. She knew his fears. She passed through it four years ago. 'Rory needs you right now!'

Jess looked her.

'I am here! I am here and I am not going anywhere. Just wish she could've told me…'

'You know Rory, you know her probably better than anyone. Are you sure that she could have told you?'

Suddenly Jess smiled. Sad smile, but still...

'I doubt it!' he said and looked at Rory's bed. 'She wouldn't tell me, because she knows what my reaction it would be.'

Lorelai nodded with agreement.

'I told her yesterday, that if it's necessary I can run through one procedure and there won't be more kids, but she freaked out.'

Lorelai almost laughed.

'You seriously told her that?'

'Yeah…' Jess blushed.

'Jess she is happy for that baby.' Lorelai looked him with softness in her eyes. 'I know that you care about her, but you have to understand that there is not such thing as motherly love.'

His smile faded.

'I already know… Yesterday, as they tried to save the baby, she cried. Those words nailed into my brain. She was ready for everything, but I… I'm not sure if I am ready to loose her…' Jess looked again to Rory. 'I know I am a selfish and probably that makes me a bad person but… '

'Jess no…' Lorelai rubbed his back, touched by his words. 'You are not bad person now! Probably you were before, but now I can see you changed. You are not selfish if you love my daughter so strong that you cannot imagine losing her. Love is not selfish feeling!'

Jess smiled again.

'Can I quote you in my book?'

Lorelai smiled him back.

'If you mention my name of course you can…'

Jess stood up and went to Rory. Doctor Straus was here earlier this morning with the ultrasound. She checked again baby's heartbeats with the belt. Even make a diagram on it. She told Jess how to protect Rory and not to put any pressure on her stomach. She gave him prescription and her phone number. They settled appointment for the next week.

Doctor Smith also came. He checked his results and told him that his recovery runs well, even better than he expected. Jess was glad for that. Now he could turn his attention to Rory. Doctor Smith told him for the possible migraine and reassured him that this would be normal and there is nothing to worry about.

Jess heard Lorelai followed him. He didn't look back.

'I think that we'll need a little help with Annie.' He said without turning back. 'First it was me, now is her mother. I don't want to traumatize her again.'

'You are right.' Lorelai said. 'You can count on me and Luke about that. Just call me if you need.'

Jess nodded and took Rory's hand. In that moment, her eyes opened.

'Hey…' her eyes shined against his. 'Is it time?' she said throaty.

'Yeah…' Jess smiled at her so intimate that Lorelai felt herself like a voyeur. She coughed and Rory looked her.

'Mom? Are you here for long?'

'Nope, just arrived.' She lied and tried to smile. 'C'mon, we have to go! One little girl is waiting for you to come home!'

'Okay…' Rory pulled out the blanket and tried to sit, but suddenly frowned. 'How are we going to do this? They won't let us get out of here without a wheelchair…'

Jess smiled and lifted her up. She felt comfortable in his arms.

'I talk with Doctor Smith. We walk out of here like this.' He said and opened the door. Lorelai followed them with the luggage.

They stopped to one pharmacy in a way home. Lorelai went shopping. She left them on the back seat. Jess sat and Rory lay with her head on his lap.

'I am scared Jess…' she whispered until her mother was gone.

'I know.' He said and ran calming fingers through her hair. 'But I'm here and you can count on me!' Jess tried to sound strong enough. Tried to put his fears aside.

'You are scared too…' she whispered again. 'You can't hide that from me. I know you better than anyone does.'

'I am scared for you.' He said finally released his fears. 'If something happened to you I don't think that I can live longer…'

Jess heard her sobbed.

'I know that feeling.' She said and reached to his hand. Their fingers touched and united.

'You don't need to cry.' Jess said after awhile and kissed her hand. 'You don't need to do anything except to rest. I take care for the other things.'

'But you're not fully recovered…'

'I am enough to watch over you!' he interrupted her with firm voice. 'Now, you'll take all of your pills and you'll listen to me. No arguing and no stress!'

'I listen, Captain!' she tried to joke, but he frowned.

'I'm not joking! You'll listen or I personal bind you to the bed!'

Rory inhaled and yawned. She was not strong enough for arguing with him. She never was.

'Did you hear me?' he said with the same firm voice.

'Yes, I did and don't worry about.'

'But I am!'

'I know…' she said and squeezed his hand. 'And I am going to listen. Everything for the baby…'

'…and for you…' he almost whispered.

Meanwhile, Lorelai called Luke and explained to him what the situation was. He said that he closed the diner and waited them home.

They arrived just for the dinner.

'Mommy! Daddy!' Annie ran to them as they stepped out from the car.

Jess grabbed her and lifted her up through the air.

'My big girl!' He said and kissed her hair. 'How are you?'

Annie giggled.

'I'm fine daddy!' she said and cuddled to him. 'Grandpa Luke said that mommy needs us now.' She said so serious and made Jess smile. 'He said that she is thin and we have to take care for her. I will.' She finished and looked him closely. 'You will too?'

Jess felt so much love in that moment. He was so proud of her.

'I will too.' Then he winked at his daughter. 'We'll make mommy eat, you'll see.'

Annie giggled once again and when Jess took her down on the ground, she went strait at Rory, who still sat in the car.

'Hey, mommy!' she hugged her carefully. Grandpa Luke told her to be careful with her mother's belly and she did.

'Hi, honey!' Rory hugged her daughter and slowly inhaled her sweet childish scent. 'I love you!' she said and saw how Annie's face shined.

'I love you too, mommy!' Annie giggled and ran back in the house.

Jess went to Rory and lifted her.

'Are you ready for this?' he whispered.

Rory nodded and cuddled into him.

'Yes, I am.'

'Well then…' Jess smiled softly. 'Welcome home!' they entered in the house, followed by Lorelai and Luke.

It was Friday and everybody sat on the table. Everybody laughed and tried to act like usual, just for Annie. They didn't want to put that pressure on her. She had to be happy with her parents in home like every normal kid.

Jess watched Rory and her desperate attempts to eat. She really tried, but after her third bit, she pushed the plate away from her. Jess frowned and Luke noticed that.

'Annie, what do you think if we go upstairs to unpack mommy and daddy's luggage? Granny may come with us! It would be fun, don't you think?' he said and caught Lorelai's eyes. She nodded with understanding and the trio disappeared through the stairs.

'You have to eat…' Jess said with low voice.

'I can't! It makes me sick!' Rory frowned and put one hand on her mouth.

'You have to eat or I'll make you eat!' he tried to gained his temper, but his eyes glowed.

'Jess I really can't!'

'But you really have!' Jess felt the first symptoms of the migraine. He touched his forehead and frowned from the pain.

'What's wrong?' Rory sounded concerned.

'Nothing!' he snapped. Jess knew that he would not talk to her like that, but his patience was already off limits. 'I'm fine and I would be more than fine if you eat your freaking meal'

'Jess!'

'What? I'm having a migraine, okay! You happy now?' he rose his voice a little. 'Now eat!'

'I can't!'

'You must!'

'Jess…' she pleaded.

'No 'Jess' me! You have to eat and that is period! You are a way too thin that you must be. You have no strength in your body, just because you have not appetite! Moreover, you are giving me migraine because of your stubbornness! '

'I'm not stubborn!' now she sound offended. 'I just can't eat… Maybe tomorrow?'

'No, no tomorrow! Today! Tomorrow you'll have your morning sickness and we'll be at the same point!'

'Don't stress me! It's not good for the baby!' her temper rose too.

'You're driving me crazy! I'm not stressing you! I just want you to eat! Is it too hard? Jeez!'

'Yes it is!'

Jess put hands on his eyes and tried to calm. When he looked at her, his face was blank. No emotions on it.

'Okay then, I'll make sure that we won't pass through this again!'

'What are you talking about?'

'We won't have any more children!'

'What?' she screamed. 'Are you crazy?'

'No, I'm not!' his face still was with blank expression. 'If you were asked me, Annie is more than enough.'

'Jess!' Rory put her hand on her stomach protectively. 'Don't talk like that!'

'If I only knew that you'll pass through this… I am not sure that I am into it! I am not sure that I would be ever, so…'

'You can't be serious!'

'But I am, in fact, I'll make a call tomorrow!'

'Give me the damn meal!' Rory pouted and reached one hand to him. 'I'll eat!'

'If you think that is the way to…'

'I said, give me the meal! I'll eat if you promise not to make that stupid procedure!'

Jess passed her one small plate with boiled potatoes and smiled when she started to eat. When she ate the whole meal, she shot him a look and suddenly laughed.

'You tricked me!'

Jess smirked.

'But you ate, didn't you!'

'You have to promise not to do this again!'

Jess stood up and went to her. He knelt and put his hand on her belly. His eyes shined against hers.

'I love our children, Rory! I always will, but I love you first and I'm not making any promises, which could threat you! If you promise that you take care for yourself, I'll do anything you want!'

Rory smiled and caressed his hair.

'I promise!' she leaned and kissed him.