Chapter 35

With his heart filled with love and gratitude Sully silently stood watching his beautiful wife in the dim light coming from the oil-lamp beside her. It had been a quiet ride home from town. The autumn dark had already fallen, and Grace had kindly insisted on sending them dinner, a dinner though none of them had had the energy or the spirit to actually eat.

Brian had helped him with the horses and finishing the chores for the night before he'd settled down with a cup of tea and his notepad in front of the cozy fire in the living room.

Katie, exhausted from the day's events, had almost fallen asleep in the wagon on the way to the homestead, and he knew Michaela had tucked her in as soon as they got home. Creeping in her room to give his sleeping angel her usual goodnight kiss he had been surprised to find her old favorite story book lying on the small table next to her bed. The book was worn from all the nights Katie had wished to hear the same fairy-tale all over again as a young child, but he hadn't seen that book in years now. Bending down to give his precious girl a feather-light kiss, Sully was filled with gratitude towards his wife. It never ceased to amaze him how she always seemed to know how to make their daughter feel safe. All of their children. He would never forget witnessing her and the Cooper children forming a family so many years ago.

After making sure Katie was asleep Michaela had helped Colleen to settle in her old room and, by the look of it, tucked her in like a baby as well. Sully swallowed hard seeing how child-like his older daughter looked curled up under the warm covers in her old bed.

Carefully so as not to startle Colleen Sully gently knelt down beside Michaela, who exhaustedly had fallen asleep on the hard chair next to Colleen's bed.

"Michaela," he softly whispered, gently rubbing her knee.

"Hmmm?" Groggily Michaela tried to orientate herself as she unwillingly started to wake.

"It's late Michaela. Time for bed," Sully kindly explained, blowing out the lamp and concernedly offering Michaela help to stand.

With some effort Michaela stiffly made it to her feet, but instead of leaving the room she was frozen in place, watching her sleeping daughter. Feeling Sully's strong arms embracing her from behind, she relaxed and trustfully leaned her head back against his shoulder. Quietly they stood there closely together, treasuring having their daughter safely at home.

"She looks so fragile," Michaela hoarsely whispered, pulling Sully's arms tighter around her, shivering as if being cold.

"Yeah, but she is strong," Sully reassuringly whispered in her ear, placing a soft kiss on the area just below. "And she won't be alone, we'll do this together," he softly added.

Feeling his wife nod against his shoulder, Sully gently began to steer her out of the room.

In the hallway, Michaela instinctively started towards Katie's room but was stopped by Sully.

"Just came from there. She's sleeping like an angel," he said, really wishing his wife would get some rest.

Knowing what's in Sully's heart, Michaela gave him an apologizing smile. "I just need to take a peek," she explained.

"Okay, I ought to check the fire downstairs and make sure our room is warm enough as well. It's really cold tonight," Sully gave in, knowing when the battle was lost. After squeezing Michaela's hand lovingly he headed for the stairs.

Peeking in through a small gap between the door and its frame, Michaela could clearly see that Sully was right. Their daughter indeed looked like a sleeping angel, and Michaela felt her heart warm at the sight. "Always stay safe my angel," she whispered in the dark before quietly closing the door.

On the way back to the master bedroom Michaela noticed light still coming from under Brian's door. Softly she knocked there and waited for a "yeah" before pushing it open.

"I saw the light… You are working?" she nodded towards the notepad naturally balancing on Brian's lap.

"Yeah," Brian shrugged his shoulders as if trying to shield himself, but his pained expression told the truth as he looked up. "Miss Dorothy asked me to write Mr. Bray's obituary for the Gazette."

"I'm sure he would have liked that," Michaela wistfully said, unable to suppress a grimace as she stiffly sat down next to her son on his bed.

"She said it was important not to make him come out dull," Brian added, questioningly gazing at his mother.

Michaela sat quietly for a while, thinking of Loren and how to explain to the young man.

"Did you find Mr. Bray boring?" she finally asked, thoughtfully eyeing her son.

"No." Brian replied, looking like he didn't even understand the question. "Then just write from here," Michaela advised, gently putting her hand over his heart, "and it will be perfect."

Quietly Brian skimmed over what he had written only to tear out the sheet and crease it into a little ball. He felt confused by his mother's words but at the same time they made perfect sense, and suddenly he felt ready for the assignment.

"I didn't have any time to tell you before but I want you to know how proud you made me today," Michaela seriously continued.

"Proud?" Brian doubtfully looked at his mother. "I screwed up. I couldn't even think… I… "

"You gave Loren exactly what he wanted. What he needed. I know it wasn't easy, that nothing has been lately, but you have handled it so well." Michaela paused to wipe away a tear. "Sometimes I can't believe that you are all grown up… "

"I don't feel very grown…"

Michaela gave her son a warm, knowing smile. "I don't think no one ever does," she wisely said. "And I for one love when I get a glimpse of my special little boy," she added with a wink, making it impossible for Brian to resist smiling.

Turing serious again, Michaela picked up the paper ball Brian had thrown between them and held it tightly in her hand. "I don't have the right to tell you all about Loren's life – nor do I believe that you need to know everything. You knew Loren and loved him for who he truly was. That's a gift you have Brian. The gift to see what's in people's hearts. Loren appreciated that, and that's the way he would want it to stay." She paused as if trying to weight the paper in her hand. "But I want you to know that your story, the one Loren asked for today, saved him all those years ago."

Brian looked totally confused.

"Your innocent words did what the rest of us had been unable to do, they saved him from himself. You gave him a reason to live," Michaela explained, gently putting the paper ball back on the bed.

"Ma?" Brian looked at Michaela with love-filled eyes.

"Yes?" Wondering, Michaela held his gaze.

"I missed you so much…" Brian closed the distance between them and fell into his mother's welcoming arms.

"I'm so glad that you are home, Brian. I'm so glad," Michaela mumbled through her tears.

"You are still up," Michaela remorsefully stated, but yet felt her heart warm as she realized Sully was waiting for her. Cross-legged he sat on the soft rug in front of the cozy fire in their bedroom, the flickering light reflecting on the rough skin on his face as he turned to give her a welcoming smile.

"I'm sorry. Brian was still up and I…" she began to apologize, but was cut off as Sully lithely got on his feet.

"I know," he said, pulling her into a loving embrace. Feeling her sway in his arms he worryingly eyed her.

"I'm just tired, Sully," she attempted to reassure him, suddenly feeling just how exhausted she really was.

"We better get you to bed then," Sully suggested, trying hard to control his worry while leading his wife to the bed. Ever so gently he helped her out of her dress and into a comfortable nightgown before tucking her in. Quietly he just sat on the edge of the bed, watching her beginning to doze off the minute her head connected with the pillow.

"Sully?" She groggily murmured, her hand fumbling over the empty space next to her where he normally would have laid, bringing him back to reality. Quickly he rounded the bed, crept under the covers and pulled her close.

"I'm here, Michaela," he softly whispered, inhaling the familiar scent of her hair. Even though he could tell by her breathing that she was fast asleep now he felt a strong urge to express his heart.

"I love you Michaela," he hoarsely whispered in the dark.