A/N: Only one more chapter after this I promise! It just got too long again! I was seriously not planning to write the honeymoon scene into this story. I was going to stop at the wedding or fade to black Breaking Dawn style, but a reader graciously helped me… thus you have to wait for one more chapter.

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer made up the names and some of the phrases like crooked grin, existence, and she also had the idea for Bella to trip a lot.

Chapter 35 - Arrested Development

The rest of the week before the wedding went by in a blur. I was relieved that Edward was there to help us pack, start moving thing into the house, oversee the furniture deliveries, and take care of those kinds of details. He and Alice had nightly meetings and went over checklists to make sure we weren't forgetting anything. I was not usually a passive person, which made me realize just how much I loved and trusted Edward. Most of my friends would have guessed that I would wear the pants in a relationship, but I took charge by letting him believe he was in control. In reality, the second I doubted him, I would have taken over. Fortunately I agreed with most of his decisions and was too in love to care about the rest of them.

Edward and the guys left on Thursday morning to go to the lake house. Some of the rentals were arriving, and Emmett had planed Edward's bachelor party for that night. The rest of us would arrive on Friday, and the wedding would be on Saturday afternoon. After I told Edward goodbye, Alice, Rosalie, and I went to pick up our dresses.

On our way to the dress botique, I got a call from Jacob. I reluctantly answered, "Hi Jake."

"Bella, Daphne just told me you're getting married in two days. I can't believe this. I didn't know it was that serious."

I wasn't sure where exactly this conversation was going to go, but if he suggested I was being abused again, I didn't have the patience to ignore it. "Yes Jake, I'm getting married. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, but a lot has happened in a short amount of time."

"Tell that dog to leave you alone," Rosalie shouted from the front seat.

"Shhhh," I gave her a death look.

"Are you sure about him Belly? You know I could make you happy. I at least deserve a chance to prove myself to you after everything we've been through."

Leave me alone dog.

"Jacob," I sighed. "You had plenty of chances, and you can't make me happy. Someone's already done that completely."

"As long as you're really happy, I guess can live with that. I wish things could have been different with us."

"Tell him what a good kisser Edward is," Alice interjected.

"Stop it you two," I said as I held my hand over the receiver.

Jacob, when you kissed me I almost threw up. When Edward kisses me I want to give it up.

"You know, I think everything happened just the way I needed it to. If you hadn't been the biggest jerk in the history of the entire universe, then I wouldn't have been ready for Edward."

"Glad I could help," Jacob chuckled.

"Just don't ever treat anyone like that again," I warned.

"I learned my lesson. Hey why didn't you invite me to the wedding? I thought we were friends again."

"We might be friends, but Edward hasn't exactly warmed up to you yet. I don't want any blood spilled on my big day. I hope you understand."

"Sure sure. I guess I better go. Bye Belly."

"STOP CALLING ME BELLY! BYE!" I hung up the phone. "And you two shut up and stop laughing at me."

We got our dresses, and all the other details seemed to have come together. This was way less stressful than some of my other friends' weddings had been in the past. I realized that if you have a lot of money, you can hire people to take care of a lot of the small things like making center pieces and decorating. I was also lucky to have a highly qualified wedding planner as my best friend.

Our last night at the rent house was bitter sweet. I could not be more excited about the path my life had taken, but I also had so many memories here with Alice. She was a true friend, a kindred spirit, the kind that of friend that is more like family and lasts forever. I was so happy that Alice had Jasper. It would have put a damper on my happiness if she hadn't found her perfect match as well, and I couldn't imagine anyone better for her than Jasper. He was the perfect calm to balance her hyper activity, and she had the right amount of optimism to save him from his melancholy. Plus they were insanely cute together.

We spent the night laughing and telling Rosalie our favorite crazy stories like the time Alice convinced me to go through a toll booth with just our bras on. We told her about how our room was over a walkway in college, so we would sit and throw twizzlers at people walking to class when we were bored.

We had barely gone to sleep, when my phone started ringing. I didn't recognize the number, but I worried that something was wrong since it was three in the morning.

"Hello?" I answered groggily.

"Bella, its Edward. I need you to wake up, and listen to me."

I sat straight up in bed my heart suddenly beating a million miles a minute, "What's wrong?"

"Emmett, Jasper, and I are in the county jail by the lake house. I need you to leave early in the morning and come pick us up when they open."

"Edward, that is not funny. I swear if you are drunk dialing me…."

"I'm not drunk, and this is not a joke Bella. I wish it were."

"What? You are really in jail! No. This can't be true. We are supposed to get married in two days, and you are in jail! What did Emmett do?"

"Everything will be fine. Emmett will not be in the wedding, because I plan on killing him, but they are going to let us out in the morning. We don't have a car though, and I don't want to call Carlisle. Please just be here early, and I'll explain what happened then."

"Edward, you know how hard it is to get Alice and Rosalie ready in the morning. Plus we still have to load the car and…."

"Bella, your fiancé is in jail. Emmett and Jasper are in jail. I hope you can convince them to put on their make up in the car for the sake of the men you love," he reasoned.

"I don't know. My dad always told me that sometimes love has to be tough."

"Bella, this is not the time to joke around," he growled.

"Ok ok we'll be there. Are you ok? Don't drop the soap whatever you do."

"We're fine. I have to go. The guard is giving me the evil eye."

"Ok, try and get some rest. I love you."

"I love you Bella, and I'm sorry about all this."

You can make it up to me Saturday night.

I couldn't go back to sleep after that. Scenarios were running wild through my mind. Edward promised they wouldn't have strippers, but what if Emmett hired hookers instead? What if they got into a bar fight? Edward would have a black eye in our pictures. Maybe they got arrested for being too hot. Lord knows it should be a crime to look as good as those three.

It was only about four hours after we'd gone to bed when I tried to wake up Alice and Rosalie.

"Alice wake up. We have to leave earlier to pick up the guys," I shook her shoulder.

"What! It's only five a.m. We don't need to get up till at least nine Bella," she whined.

"Alice the boys got arrested last night. We have to go pick them up from jail."

"What?!?!" Alice screeched and jumped out of bed. "Are they ok? Is Jasper hurt? What have they done to my baby?"

"Alice calm down. I don't know what happened, but Edward promised me that everything is fine."

We tried to wake up Rosalie. When she started to stir, I told her about the guys' little problem. "Not again!" she moaned and rolled over in the bed.

"Rose get up. We have to go get them." Alice shook her again.

"Let them suffer. He should have learned his lesson by now," she said unmoving.

"Please Rosalie, I'm getting married tomorrow and my fiancé is in lock up."

"Ok ok." She climbed out of bed looking much less beautiful than normal.

I love this side of you Rose!

She and Alice got ready, and Rosalie grumbled the entire time. I couldn't quite make out what she was saying, but every once in a while I heard an 'idiot,' 'moron,' or 'I'm never getting married' escape her lips.

We drug ourselves into my Rover, and settled in for the ride. "So Rosalie, I take it this has happened before?" I asked.

"Our last year of college, he got arrested for indecent exposure when he mooned a bunch of girls leaving their dorm. He still can't drive in Idaho because of all his unpaid speeding tickets, and last year he got arrested for a DUI. He wasn't drinking, but thought he would be funny and trip during the sobriety test. I can't imagine having children with that dumb ass."

Alice and I both giggled, but Rosalie was not amused. "Come on Rosalie, you know all the stupid things he does are part of the reason you love him so much," I tried to reason.

"I know. I just wish he would grow up sometimes," she sighed.

"Edward told me he's a genius when it comes to the business. He credits Emmett with a lot of their top projects."

"Yeah yeah, and he so is damn sexy," she started to melt. "When he touches me I can't even remember my name sometimes. The things that man can do with his…"

"Stop!" Alice and I yelled and both held our hands over our ears. "That's enough!"

We got to the jail about an hour later than we'd hoped to and found three moping hotties sitting outside on the steps. Jasper looked stoic, Edward looked annoyed, and Emmett was leaning his head against the building, with his mouth hanging open, snoring. When I stopped the car, Alice jumped out and launched herself at Jasper. She jumped into his arms and attacked his face with kisses. Rosalie walked up to Emmett and smacked him in the head. He woke up and rubbed the spot where she hit him. I walked slowly over to Edward. He wrapped me in a hug and said quietly in my ear, "You're a sight for sore eyes. Thank you for coming."

"I can't believe I'm picking you up from jail the day before our wedding," I sighed and squeezed him tightly.

When we were all loaded into the car, I broke the silence, "You guys better tell us what happened." Everyone turned to look at Emmett.

"Oh of course, everyone just assumes it was me who did it," Emmett rolled his eyes.

"Emmett!" The five of us scolded.

"Alright alright. Edward didn't want to do anything fun for his bachelor party, so I thought we would have some good ol' boy bonding out in the country. I was feeling a little inspired after your party Bells," he looked at Rose and winked. I swear her face turned red. "Anyway we went out in the middle of nowhere and built a campfire. We were playing some country tunes, talkin', throwing back some brewskies, and cooking some dogs on the open flame. How was I supposed to know there was a burn ban, and we were in danger of starting a forest fire? The next thing I knew a deputy showed up and arrested us."

"Emmett we were hardly arrested for having a campfire," Jasper rolled his eyes. "Genius over here wouldn't stop calling the officer bro and trying to get him to join us so we could keep the fire going. He offered him a beer, and that's when things started to get ugly."

"I stepped in front of Emmett and started to apologize to the officer. Emmett said something about our new buddy not being mad and gave the officer a butt slap like he'd just made a touch down," Edward pinched the bridge of his nose at the memory.

"Yeah, the jerk slammed me to the ground and put hand cuffs on me," Emmett complained. "He said something about sexual assault charges and threw me in the back of his car."

"I tried again to apologize and told him about your wedding, when the officer said he'd had enough and arrested us too for attempted arson," Jasper explained.

"I was the only one smart enough to call chief Masen with my one phone call." Emmett said proudly. "He talked the sheriff into dropping the charges and just keeping us overnight."

"Yeah, you're a real genius," Edward said sarcastically.

"So let me get this straight," I interrupted. "You got arrested for slapping an officer on the butt after offering him a beer to bribe him into letting you continue your male bonding around a campfire?"

"Yep, that pretty much sums it up," Jasper replied.

Alice, Emmett, and I burst out laughing. Jasper crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Emmett. Edward focused on driving but didn't look amused, and Rosalie looked out the window angrily before finally starting to giggle with us.

I grabbed Edward's hand and he glanced over at me. "Edward please forgive Emmett. We don't want anything to ruin the next two days, and he's your best man. Plus just think what a great story you have to tell. Please Edward," I pleaded and made a pouty face.

"Yeah Eddie come on. Now we're even for the time you… Dang I can't think of anything," Emmett tried to convince him.

"I'll forgive him on one condition," Edward replied to me. "He can't talk for the rest of the ride to the house."

Emmett started to say something, but Rosalie slapped her hand over his mouth holding it closed. Edward pulled my hand up to his lips and kissed it smiling at me from the corner of his eye.

The rest of the day was a blur of preparations, welcoming our families as they arrived, and trying to steal time away with my Edward. Thankfully my mom and Elizabeth seemed to hit it off. They both kept spontaneously crying. Edward was very attentive to his mom, which I found completely adorable. I stared at him with wonder as he wrapped her in his arms and brushed the tears off his face. I didn't know how I could possibly be so lucky.

After everything was as ready as it could be, the rehearsal was over, and dinner was eaten, Edward and I snuck away to go on a walk.

"Are you ready for this Bella?" Edward said wrapping one arm around my waist.

"I'm ready to rumble! How about you Gunner? Cold feet?"

"I'm wearing extra socks just in case," he joked. "I've never been more ready for anything. Carlisle is still giving me a hard time about doing this all so fast, but I still don't see any reason there was to wait."

"I know. My friends had lots of questions about that at my party. I couldn't bear the thought of having to be apart from you though, and I didn't want to keep living in sin," I gave him a wink. "I still think this is a dream I'm going to wake up from."

"I honestly just didn't think I could wait much longer to be with you," he stopped walking and touched our foreheads together.

"You've been with me almost every day," I thought I was stating the obvious. "That was a rough two weeks though, my cell phone bill…"

"No I mean to be with you," he gave me a look that made me understand exactly what he was talking about.

"I uh, I – I'm nervous," I admitted blushing.

But even more curious.

"Just trust me Bella. Nothing could be more right than you and I together."

I looked into his eyes and didn't see any fear or reservations, only love and confidence. "Ok," I whispered.

Edward started to kiss me, and it was like the first day we met all over again. My legs turned to mush, and Edward had to support my weight to keep me upright.

"St-stop," I breathed. "No more practicing tonight. You need to go hang out with the guys and I need to be with Alice and Rosalie."

Edward sighed but conceded to my demands. He walked me to the door of the house where we girls were staying with Carlisle and Esme and gave me one more kiss. "Goodnight Mrs. Cullen."

"Goodnight," I leaned against the doorframe and watched him walk away.

Tomorrow I get to you see naked. Tomorrow tomorrow I love ya tomorrow…. Oh you get to see me naked too. Crap.

I found Alice, Rosalie, and Esme all in one of the bedrooms talking. They smiled when I walked in, and I sank down on one of the beds and sighed. "Edward is so dreamy," I gushed over dramatically.

"Good Lord, you should get married tonight so we don't have to listen to this anymore," Alice rolled her eyes.

"Whatever. You are just as bad calling Jasper 'baby' and talking about how sexy he is all the time," I countered.

"So do you have any questions about tomorrow night dear?" Esme asked.

I gave her a horrified look and quickly answered, "Uh uh."

"You don't have to worry about a thing dear. You just let him do all the work, while you lay back and enjoy it," she suggested.

"Esme! You're like a mother to Edward. He would be horrified if he knew what you were saying to me," I exclaimed.

"Whatever you do try and enjoy it," Alice warned. "Remember Andrea's friend who waited till her honeymoon, hated sex, and has refused to sleep with her husband again ever since? It's been what – eight months now?"

"Don't scare her Alice. It's going to hurt a little bit, but no pain no gain Bella. Sex with the right person is the most incredible thing you'll ever experience," Rosalie assured me.

"Amen!" Esme chimed in.

We all looked at her and laughed.

Will Edward still love me if I hate it? What if he hates it?

"We probably won't even get that far. Edward will probably throw up when he sees my cellulite."

"Trust me Bella, once he sees your boobs he's not going to notice any cellulite," explained Rosalie.

"So true so true," Esme said shaking her head back and forth with a knowing smile. We all laughed again. "Girls I may be old enough to be your mother, but you can ask my husband, he is very satisfied."

"Oh my gosh!" I screamed and buried my head in a pillow. We laughed and talked into the early morning hours. I felt honored that Edward had said I remind him of Esme. When I finally fell asleep, I dreamed of walking down the aisle naked wearing only a veil and Edward holding his hand over his eyes and asking if he could peek yet.

A/N: I'm seriously not updating with the lemon unless I get enough reviews. Yes…that's a threat. Some stories take months to update. The longest I've gone is a few days. You owe me.