Bishi Pile Challenge: Challenge response to Conspiracy, Shadows Minor to Wind, Anger Word count: 1,991
Series: Friends 37/??
Author: Karina
Pairings: Duo + Zechs
Ratings: M 15+ In Australia Rated in the event of bad language and violence.
Archive: Under the name kt at Gundam Wing Universe at /
Gundam Wing Diaries www.gundam-wing-diaries./gw/Karina/gwKarina.htm
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or the characters. That's the way it is.
Warnings: Not a death fic despite how it starts.
Many thanks to Katie for betaing Friends.
Character Challenge Quatre, Duo and Zechs
Chapter 37
It was a problem, not knowing exactly how much he could say without alarming the man he knew was alert and watchful to the happenings beyond his tent.
Zechs would be at his most dangerous, trapped as he was with a weakened body and unknown allies blocking any escape he might have attempted. They were allies, not enemies, but what did Zechs Marquise really know of the three who had arrived in the waning hours of the blizzard? For that matter, what did Zechs know about the man who had saved his life, Duo mused?
They had never really met before this enforced occupation of the cabin. Duo, to be honest, had not really cared to know the man beneath the legend that was Milliardo Peacecraft. Aside from a brief radio contact during the battle against the Barton factionists, there had been a brief head nod after the battle and Marquise had vanished thereafter. No, he did not know Marquise at all, either as Peacecraft or Marquise and Duo was honest with himself; he was still trying to come up with a satisfactory answer to the question of why he was here.
Why was he in this desolate wind swept cabin in the middle of the Sanc mountain ranges, chasing a man he did not even know?
/I'm such a dumb bastard./
A by product of living on the streets was that he could not claim himself to have ever been a trusting soul. When you had nothing you jealously guarded what little you could claim, and unless you were invited you did not interfere with anything, or anyone, that did not belong to you. On the streets, especially in the gangs of L2, you learned to keep your hands to yourself, your valued possessions close or hidden safely away, and your friends at a safe distance.
Solo was an exception to the rule, but the Duo of then had been too young; the Duo of now had a better understanding of life's truths. He considered himself uncommonly blessed to have had more than one.
Why had he come out here? He felt that he had somehow placed a claim on the man; a claim he did not begin to understand… but might have something to do with what was best not spoken. Like Quatre.
Quatre was someone he could not keep at a safe distance. Of all the Gundam pilots Quatre was the closest to him, as close perhaps as Solo had permitted himself to get with one of his kids. There had always been a guarded distance in his life; a safe zone to protect him from what he knew must come. Loss. Death. Betrayal for something as simple and important as a crust of bread.
Quatre knew where that fine line was and not to step over it. He was just eerie that way. Trowa was not as close to Duo as he was to his lover, which was entirely to be expected, but he seemed to understand well enough how Duo needed space. In fact, Duo was astonished Trowa accepted his constantly invading the lovers space.
It would be Quatre's doing, of course. Quatre always knew just what to say, when to say it and how to say it without suffering retribution from the darkness that lurked; from the Shinigami within Duo. Quatre, the pacifist business man, had his own Shinigami and could see it well enough in others. He had the unnerving ability he termed his 'Space Heart' and Duo knew from past experience that Space Heart was real, not imagined. It was as real as Duo's own 'feelings' were real.
Quatre was better able to deal with his version of that extra sense and Duo hoped, one day, to understand his own vague feelings, with Quatre's aid.
Now there was Zechs, or Milliardo, though he seemed not to favour that name. Zechs was different too and Duo recognized that Zechs understood what was different about himself, but Duo also understood that, unlike Quatre, Zechs was far from comfortable with others knowing he was not normal. It was, in fact, dangerous for others to know the Peacecraft Prince was what Quatre insisted on calling 'Gifted'.
/How much could I tell Trowa? How much is safe? Zechs didn't so much as grunt when I warned Tro to watch his back. Really, what can I say? It must be pretty obvious to all of them that something is wrong about this whole deal./
None of them were dumb. They were all intelligent, trained to be observant and competent at their work. Yuy and Chang had brains even if they were both constantly anal about being 'normal' and 'fitting in' and being a 'productive member of society'.
What he wanted to do was crawl into the tent, zip up the flap and nestle down in that warm sleeping bag. If he did that he could pull that big blonde teddy bear, who made a great hot water bottle, down with him and, for a time at least, Duo could forget the outside world existed. The down side of course was the dreams. After so many disruptions to his night he was sure to dream. His thoughts of conspiracies were disturbing enough to unsettle him at a subconscious level and guarantee a return to nightmare.
/I might not be lucky enough to be woken out of it so early into the dream. That reminds me; the dream. It wasn't the same. There was something different about it. And Zechs… he was in it. I know he was there, not a part of the horror, but he was there, in it. I can't front him with witnesses to overhear us. They would only get confused and angry, and it would degenerate into a slanging match as it has so many times before when they haven't understood their input was not only not welcome, but not needed. Now that they have shown up I might not get the chance to front Zechs about it. Damn. He has information I want. He knows about those sorts of dreams and I need to know how to stop them. But I need to know about the shit he is in too, and I'm sure he's not going to want to tell me about that. I have to get them to settle down for the night so I can go to bed. If we keep our voices down I might be able to get something out of him./
Zechs had to be different in much the same way as he and Quatre were different from most people. The man might be sitting propped up in the tent behind and to one side of him, but Duo could feel a dark and brooding presence behind him. It needed explaining. While whatever it was Zechs could do was different to Quatre's space heart and was incredibly different from his own vague feelings of needing to be somewhere and doing something specific, and that drove him relentlessly on occasion, Duo was sure it was somehow the same.
Getting Zechs to talk about it instead of simply glare at him in stubborn silence would not be easy. Suspecting was not enough and getting confirmation would be difficult. If he did get the man to admit to an extra sensory ability, perhaps even explain what he could do; if not how he could do it, what then?
/I need to talk to Quatre. He knows about my 'feelings' and he's not laughed about them. I didn't tell him about what I sometimes feel, but he knew. He must have been watching me, right from that time we sheltered in Arabia. You can't hide much from Quatre. I wonder what he would do, what he would think, if he had some alone time with Zechs?/
But to tell Quatre what little he knew would place his friend at risk. Just his coming out into the mountains after Marquise had placed them all at risk.
He could almost feel a hand resting a millimetre off his shoulder. There was a hand, hovering just that fractional bit from his shoulder. It was there, he could feel it. But there was no one standing behind him, no one looming over him. No one physical, at least.
How did he do it, this phantom presence?
Duo wanted to shrug his shoulders, to free himself of the presence standing so close, but he dared not. Not with Trowa watching him. Quatre's lover was tolerant of his wilder moments, but Yuy and Chang were on the other side of that open doorway and they certainly would not understand or ignore eccentric seeming behaviour. They would not understand that he was not imagining things; that he did not speak just to attract their attention. It would only make them more determined to step in and guide him into making a 'decent' life.
Settle down, get a job, be normal. That was their 'decent' life.
What the fuck was normal anyway?
They made him so angry some days. They thought he needed to be just like them, to have what they had; do what they did with their Preventer protocols and their 'look at me, I am normal' obsession.
He knew how desperately they wanted to be just another person, to be normal, to fit in with the new world order. If you did not see the world in the same shades of grey, then you were in need of guidance. It was a very black and white world to some people, but Duo chose to think of himself as special. He took pride in being an individual.
Not abnormal or deviant or weird.
Duo could feel, see and taste the colours of the world.
"I suspect much is not as it seems."
Trowa's voice shattered his thoughts and thrust him back into the pantry, back into his solid body. While he could still feel that looming presence behind him it was not so vivid now; not so vibrant.
"What's Quatre up to?"
"Hopefully he would be in bed, which is where I long to be." Trowa turned the camera over in his hands. "This… this is not what I expected to find."
"Yeah." Duo's eyes flicked back to the tent. "Sure as hell wasn't what I expected to find."
"I owe Mr. Maxwell my life."
The quiet voice seemed to rumble from the rock surrounding them and Duo suppressed a shiver. There was something dangerous, not so much in the voice, but in the air. With a shiver tracing the length of his spine, Duo thought the voice might have been coming from the Shadow looming over him.
"Yeah. I guess you do." Trowa set the camera beside him. "I'll make a copy of this when I get back to the helo."
"You should have waited until morning, Tro. It would have been safer."
"Undoubtedly, but we fly when we are ordered to. Given our orders we should be on our way back to the helicopter now, but I am not inclined to go out in that wind again." He grinned. "You know the weather is bad when the other two are not inclined to venture out."
In the tent Zechs listened, eyes closed, his attention focused within. He could almost touch Duo and he suspected the younger man could feel his presence, though he would fail to understand the implications. For the moment it was safer no one suspect what he could do.
Barton was far less abrasive than Chang had proven to be and Duo was more comfortable with him. He was quieter, more prone to contemplation and too easily underestimated. He had been the infiltrator, the chameleon who infiltrated Oz and Barton's organization. Zechs knew he was one to be watched as he would not act quickly, nor recklessly. This one would observe and plan and act only when he was certain of the need.
End
Karina Robertson 2008