Christian
I sit on the ground and lean my head against the wall.
As I listened to her sobs and her tell Jason how she feels about me, it makes me feel like a complete asshole. I am an asshole. I've locked myself away from everyone since the incident. I have been quiet and mostly stay in my office. The only person I'm around most is Ana and that's because she calms me down with my nightmares.
We have also taken time to write parts of the story, but I have to story. We have to stop a lot because it brings back memories of what happened in the woods. Jack reminded me of the pimp. The scars he caused, the beatings he brought on me with his henchmen, how he starved me. It was just like how the pimp treated me. Then how Alex was screaming for them to stop, just like my mom did before she was given her next fix. I was reliving everything all over again.
When I heard Ana's confession about her love for me, I felt my heart constrict. I thought she couldn't love. My mind flashes to what Alex said.
I broke up with her because I wanted more and she didn't.
How can she love me then? She tells Jason that it pissed her off when Leila kissed me. That brought a smile to my lips. I started to think it's because of what happened until she tells Jason that if she told me that I wouldn't believe her, that I would blame it on that. She knows me well.
I listened to everything she said and I frown. I've hurt her so many times. Yet, she's still stayed by my side. She's never left me. The thought of her leaving would break me more than I am now.
I keep myself hidden as the guys walk through the doors. I can't let them know that I was spying. I get up and walk into the kitchen. Ana notices me and she gives me a small smile.
I walk over to her and bring a hand to her cheek, wiping away a tear. I put my other hand on her hip.
"I'm so sorry." I tell her. She frowns.
"You didn't do anything wrong."
"Yes I did. I should have never yelled at you like that. I shouldn't have shut you out this whole time. Not any of you. I've treated you terribly and I'm so sorry." I sigh.
"You were tortured Christian. Jack almost killed you. Don't be sorry." I flinch at the name.
"That's not an excuse." I say pressing my forehead against hers. "Do you know how much you mean to me Ana?" she shakes her head. "I would do anything just to keep you here with me. If anything ever happened to you it would ruin me. You're more important to me than GEH." she chuckles.
"I highly doubt that." I give her a serious look. She looks at me shocked. "You're serious." she says.
I want this woman to be mine. No one else's. I want her to be the one to wake up beside me everyday not just because my nightmares but because we're actually each other's. I want her to be at to hold her hand and tell every reporter out there that this woman is mine. I want her to be the one who walks down the aisle wearing a beautiful white dress. I want this woman to be mine.
I run my hand through her hair and bring her lips to mine. Her hands run up my arms, wrapping around my neck. We haven't kissed or fucked since the incident. I just haven't wanted anyone near me and I knew Ana didn't mind because she knew it was the best for me. This feels so good though.
Her lips are so soft and I know it's because her tears. The tears I caused her. I wrap my arm around her waist. I kiss her softly and slowly. She wants to deepen it but I want to savor her, she's too damn amazing to rush with.
I pull away from her. She sighs, giving me a small smile. I pull her against me, and wrap my arms around her. The pain isn't as bad as I thought it'd be. I lay my head on hers and take a deep breath. She's mine and all the fuckers out there will know.
"I love you Anastasia." I whisper. She gasps. I pull away and see tears in her eyes. Her eyes are wide and her mouth is open.
"I thought-" she stutters. I pull her lips to mine.
"Just please say it." I whisper against her lips. She chokes on a sob.
"I love you too." she says kissing me hard, her tears falling against both of our cheeks with her grip tightening against my neck.
Anastasia
My goodbye was just a dream then. It will never be goodbye.
He told me he loved me. This is reality.