Over hill, over dale,
Thorough bush, thorough briar,
Over park, over pale,
Thorough flood, thorough fire,
I do wander everywhere,
Swifter than the moon's sphere;
And I serve the fairy queen,
To dew her orbs upon the green.
The cowslips tall her pensioners be;
In their gold coats, spots you see;
Those be rubies, fairy favours,
In their freckles live our savours.
I must go seek some dew-drops here,
And hang a pearl in every cowslip's ear.
Farewell, thou lob of spirits, I'll be gone;
My queen and all her elves come here anon!
[„A Midsummer Night's Dream", Fairy Scene I - William Shakespeare]
Stella was working late the night they had a movie date, forcing them to cancel their initial plans. Scully wasn't fussed about not going to the movies; the weather was gorgeous and she enjoyed strolling through the busy streets of London, walking to their favorite Italian restaurant.
Somehow they hadn't been able to find a movie they both liked and she had half-heartedly agreed to something that she wasn't particularly interested in. Now that she had had a bit of time on her hands she had come up with an idea. Her heart was pounding, her hands trembling slightly with excitement after what she had done and she couldn't wipe the smile of her face. She felt lighter and liberated, wondering what Stella would say.
She watched her own reflection in the window facades while she walked by. It might take a bit of time to get used to it but she didn't regret the decision. It was almost 7.30pm by the time she arrived at the restaurant. It looked like most tables were occupied and her heart dropped for a moment, thinking that it would have been smarter to make a reservation. To her great joy an overly friendly waiter showed her to a table that was partially hidden by the blooming bushes of peonies, far off from the busy activities on the patio in front of the restaurant.
Scully took her seat, facing the direction she had just come from, ordered a glass of white wine and some water. She checked her phone while she waited, tucking a few strands of hair behind her ear. She couldn't help but smile, thinking that it felt so much better. She had not just had her hair chopped off, it felt like she had also cut off something that she had been carrying around for too long.
She barely remembered the time in her life when she had worn her hair this short and, although it wasn't exactly new, it felt like it.
She thanked the waiter, asking him to show Stella the way as soon as she arrived. She recognized the waiter from all their previous visits though not by any chance could she recall his name. Scully was lost in thoughts, lulled in by distant chatter and the sound of cars passing somewhere in the distance; it almost sounded like the sound of the sea if you allowed your imagination to trick you.
She heard laughter and the clatter of cutlery on plates, people coming and going. Scully tried to listen closely, maybe she would be able to make out Stella when she arrived. She smelled something that resembled pizza and it made her realize that she was starving, wondering what she would like for dessert. She couldn't help but laugh at herself since she hadn't even thought about dinner. She almost knew the entire menu by heart; every time they ate here she would spend minutes browsing the menu but ended up ordering the same dish over and over again. Stella always laughed at her until she grew slightly frustrated when Scully needed ages while she was hungry; they both knew that she would pick the same thing in the end.
Scully sipped her wine, trying not to finish it before Stella got here, absent-mindedly picking at the bread that the waiter had left on the table. She wasn't sure how long it took but all of a sudden the distinct sound of high heels on the pavement caught her attention and a few seconds later she heard Stella's voice, asking for their table.
Scully looked up when Stella came into view, her face lighting up when she saw her. She looked stressed, annoyed by having to work so late while she wasn't working on an active case, but it seemed to vanish the second she laid eyes on Dana. If Scully wasn't mistaken she stopped dead in her tracks for a second, the look on her face a mixture of surprise and astonishment.
Scully felt her cheeks blush a little, biting her lip while she waited for Stella. She looked up and smiled when Stella stopped beside her, dropping her bag on the floor between their chairs.
„Oh my God," Stella whispered, smiling.
„Do you like it?"
„Yes," Stella said with a smile, unable to take her eyes off Dana. She sat down in the chair to her left, not wanting to sit opposite her for now.
Stella touched the loose ends of her silky hair that was now a lot shorter than it had been this morning, barely reaching her shoulders. She leaned in for a gentle kiss, lingering a little longer when she felt the warmth of Dana; she tasted the wine on her lips and smiled into the kiss.
„Wow… you… um… You're so beautiful," Stella whispered, still amazed.
„Thank you," Scully said, quietly playing with the stem of her wine glass.
She wanted to say something smarter but found herself at a loss of words. The adoration she saw on Stella's face, mixed with unaltered joy, touched her deeply and she was more grateful than ever that they weren't sitting in the darkness of a movie theatre now.
Stella touched Dana's cheek and leaned back in her chair.
„Do you like it?" Stella asked and reached for Dana's glass, finishing the rest of her wine.
„Yes," Scully said softly and leaned her head on her hand. „It feels nice."
„I'm glad you're happy with it," Stella said and motioned for the waiter to bring them some more wine.
„How was work?"
Stella sighed, desperate to kick off her shoes but she felt like she couldn't do that here although they were pretty much on their own.
„Don't ask," Stella said. „It's a mess."
„Wanna talk about it?"
„Not now," Stella said with a smile. „Maybe later, I'd rather hear what you've been up to."
„Other than having my hair cut?"
„That's obvious," Stella said and smiled.
„Nothing out of the ordinary happened at work," Scully said. „I finished my shift at the hospital and then held a lecture at university. It felt like there were ten students present at most."
„I can imagine," Stella laughed. „The weather is too nice to be inside."
„Or at the cinema," Scully suggested.
„Yeah, that wasn't a smart idea," Stella said. „Maybe we should save that for the winter."
Their conversation was interrupted by the waiter, serving them their drinks and handing them each the menu. Stella reached for her glass and leaned back in her chair.
„Chin chin," she said and toasted to Dana; she chuckled and sipped her drink. „Do you know what you would like to eat?"
„Good one," Scully said and laughed; she bit her thumbnail while she scanned the menu, trying to figure out what she'd like.
„I think I'd like salmon and pasta," Stella said while Scully was more interested in dessert because she was craving something sweet.
„That sounds lovely."
The dinner was calm and they both felt relaxed after a long day at work. Scully didn't mention that she wasn't particularly happy with her jobs any longer, thinking that it was a topic fit for another time.
She had enjoyed both of her jobs, grateful to have something that made her feel secure and happy but it had been rather tiring lately. The main reason was that traveling between Oxford and London always took up a lot of time that she'd rather be spending with Stella, it would be easier if she permanently worked in London but she hadn't been able to figure that out yet.
During the course of their dinner Stella talked about her job and that she was supposed to work on active cases in the near future. She had paid the price for the Belfast disaster and it was time to leave that behind and move forward. While Stella was actually excited, Scully had an uneasy feeling that came along with it but she didn't want to voice her concerns.
Stella also mentioned working at university. Given her experience and her mostly immaculate career she certainly had a lot of knowledge to pass on and Scully loved the thought of Stella holding lectures at university more than picking up criminals on the streets of London.
The wine flowed freely and Scully finally got her Tiramisu for dessert, gladly sharing it with Stella; she didn't know about Stella but she felt a little tipsy when they walked home about three hours later.
It was early when Scully opened her eyes on a Sunday morning. The daylight fell through the blinds but it seemed quiet and peaceful. To her surprise it was only five o'clock but she felt wide awake.
She didn't want to wake Stella, trying to remain quiet while she tried to make up her mind. Scully leaned back, sinking into her warm pillow and closed her eyes. There were only so many things she could do at the crack of dawn without creating tremendous noise in an otherwise quiet and peaceful flat.
She allowed her thoughts to wander until she remembered that it was Sunday and there was something that used to be an inherent part of her childhood, and most of her adult life. After her mother's passing, and everything she had been put through, she had neglected that tradition.
She had never had time to go to church, finding one excuse after another to avoid attending service but nonetheless ended up in that little church shortly after finding out about her child's death and it had somehow opened her eyes, reminding her of something familiar that had once given her a great amount of assurance and safety. It was something that she had missed without realizing it; it had nothing to do with Stella or anyone else in her life. She knew that this was her own personal thing and she'd have to do it all on her own.
Scully sighed, thinking that she had been manipulating herself on purpose; maybe she thought that she didn't deserve to go to church any longer after everything she had done; maybe a part of her thought that it wasn't her place any longer.
She turned on her side, quietly watching Stella in her sleep. They had never actually talked about things like that and for some reason she had always pictured Stella as someone who didn't go to church but she might be doing her wrong.
While she leaned back she thought of that tiny church that had given her shelter when she had needed it most. She wanted to go back and attend the service and maybe she would feel a little more at ease with herself after that, making herself believe that she hadn't given up on everything she had grown up with. She dozed off a little, lingering somewhere between being asleep and awake. By the time the clock showed seven she couldn't stand it any longer and slipped out of bed, trying not to wake Stella. She tiptoed into the kitchen to make coffee, opening all windows to let the cool morning breeze in while the kitchen started smelling of freshly brewed coffee.
She couldn't help herself, reaching for her hair every time she caught a glimpse of herself somewhere, thinking that it had been the right decision. The look on Stella's face, when she had first surprised her with that new look, had most definitely been worth it.
They had barely made it through the front door, leaving the kitchen between while they had stumbled to the bedroom without taking their hands off each other. Scully smiled at the memory, quietly taking her favorite cup out of the cupboard.
The moment they walked in Stella kicked off her heels and groaned when her feet touched the floor.
„Oh God," Stella laughed and sat down on the counter, propping her feet up against the chair. She usually didn't sit on it but she was feeling cheeky tonight, watching Dana grab a bottle of water from the fridge.
„You want some?" she offered after taking a swig herself.
„Yes, please," Stella said and reached for the bottle.
Dana stood in front of her and Stella finished the water before she put it aside. She cupped Dana's face with both hands, regarding her quietly for a few seconds.
Seeing her with such short hair was still an unusual sight; it seemed to change her entire appearance and Stella couldn't love it more.
„You are so beautiful," Stella whispered and Scully stepped between her legs; Stella hooked them behind Dana and laughed against her lips.
„Stop it," Scully whispered and put her arms around Stella.
„Are you blushing, Dr. Scully?"
„Yes, I think I am," Scully pulled her in for a kiss that slowly turned into something more demanding; Scully's hands wandered to the buttons of her blouse, undoing them one by one.
Stella tilted her head back, exposing her neck when Dana kissed her warm skin, tasting salty and sweet. The blouse slipped off her shoulders and Stella hummed at the touch of Dana's lips, slowly reaching the swell of her breasts. Stella tangled her hands in Dana's hair, keeping her close while she pushed the cups of her bra down and teased her nipples with her tongue.
How easy it would be to make this quick, right here and right now but Stella had a better idea. She summoned all her strength, ignoring her damp panties and aching clit, pulling Dana away from her breasts.
„Not here," she breathed between kisses and slid off the counter, right into Dana's arms.
„Better?" Scully whispered against her lips, gently pushing her against the wall. Stella laughed when she wiggled out of her skirt, making quick work of Dana's clothes while she still had her hands free. She felt hot and flushed, a fine layer of sweat already covering her mostly naked skin.
„Almost," Stella breathed and reached behind her back to unclasp her own bra. She tossed it aside and guided Dana into the bedroom, gently pushing her until the back of her knees reached the bed.
Stella kneeled in front of her, never taking her eyes away from Dana while she reached for her panties, slowly peeling them off her body. Scully leaned down, capturing her swollen lips in a desperate kiss.
„Lay down on your side," Stella whispered and smiled, leaving Scully to wonder what she was up to.
She did as she was told, laying on her side and waited. Stella sat beside her, slowly french kissing with her hands running up and down the curves of her body. Stella's lips descended slowly, leaving a trail of kisses in her wake and Scully started to get an idea of where this was heading. She bit her lip with a grin on her face and looked at Stella.
Without another word she parted her legs, one knee bent on the mattress, the other propped up, giving Stella perfect access to her throbbing clit and before she knew it she was lazily eating her out with Stella doing just the same. She had to admit that laying on her side while they did so was a lot more comfortable than being on top of her and she savored every moment of it. She sucked Stella's swollen clit, her angle giving her perfect access to finger her just as comfortably, hitting the right spots. She felt Stella moan against her pussy, the low vibrations making her all tingly. She almost forgot what she was doing when Stella's touch made her toes curl, her arousal running down the insides of her thighs.
It was driving her crazy and it didn't take long for her to come hard and fast with Stella following not long after. They rolled on their backs besides each other, Stella's head at the other end of the bed, quietly trying to catch their breaths.
After a while Scully felt the sweat dry on her skin, dying to get into the shower. She crawled on top of Stella and kissed her, faintly tasting herself on Stella's lips.
„Let's get into the shower," Scully suggested and Stella nodded, slowly following her into the bathroom.
„Why are you awake already?" Stella yawned while she scuffed into the kitchen.
„I just couldn't sleep any longer. Why did you get out of bed? I tried to let you sleep in a bit longer."
„I smelled coffee," Stella said with a tired smile.
Scully closed the windows when the sun rose before she poured Stella a fresh cup of coffee, joining her on the sofa. She put Stella's feet in her lap and handed her the cup.
The next few minutes passed in pleasant silence, both sipping their drinks. Scully's thumb was absent-mindedly caressing the soft skin around Stella's left ankle; she was still tired but too restless to go back to sleep so she thought she might as well give up.
„What would you like to do today?" Stella asked, wondering what she normally used to do on Sundays.
She barely remembered it, thinking that she had probably spent all day catching up on paperwork or trying to solve a case and now that this wasn't happening she had all the time in the world to do other things.
Scully shrugged before she answered.
„I was thinking of going to church later," Scully said quietly and looked at Stella.
„Oh ok," Stella said with a hint of surprise because she really hadn't expected that.
„Will you come with me?" Scully asked carefully as if she was afraid of being rejected.
„Of course," Stella said without a second thought; it was out of question not to. She had never actually gone to church nor had she been raised in a religious way but she would definitely join Dana.
„I mean, you don't have to," Scully said. „If you don't want to. It's okay, I really don't mind going on my own."
„Don't be silly," Stella said and sat up. „I'll come with you, I know it means a lot to you."
„I just don't want you to agree something that you really have no use for."
„I've never given it much thought," Stella admitted. „It has never been a part of my life."
„Do you believe in God?"
„Does it matter?"
Scully laughed.
„No, but I was just wondering. We never talked about that."
„It's a good question," Stella said and thought about her answer.
„You don't have to answer," Scully said and emptied her cup.
„It's ok. I'm just trying to find the right words," Stella said. I don't actually believe in God… I think. I never had anything to do with religious matters, it wasn't part of my upbringing and, to be honest, it's hard to believe in something I can't see."
„I think I get that," Scully said, remembering that she had had that conversation with Mulder at least a hundred times before.
„I'm always amazed by your faith and how you believe so strongly," Stella said. „Don't get me wrong but you seem to rely on your medicine and your profession and… you work with scientific facts."
„Believe me, I've questioned my faith many times before," Scully said. „But I was raised to believe in it and it took a lot to let go and to doubt it after everything I had been put through."
„With all the terrible things we've seen over the years, with all the horrible deaths I've witnessed I sometimes find it hard to believe in something good and at the same time it calms me to believe that there is something out there… something to look up to."
Stella took a deep breathe, still attempting to explain what she actually believed in.
„I like the thought of… something," Stella said. „It seems hard for me to believe in an actual God or a person but I like the thought of believing in something, whatever that may be. It's soothing somehow."
„I used to rely on facts to do my job, just like you do," Scully explained. „But I never had a reason to question my beliefs, at least not until I started working with Mulder."
„Isn't it hard to hold on to something you can't see when everything seems to go wrong in your life?"
„Yes," Scully whispered, a sudden rush of sadness seizing her heart. „But I like to believe that everything happens for a reason, as challenging as that may be," she said and turned her head; she smiled at Stella and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.
„That's something I can live with," Stella said and Scully put her cup aside, pushing Stella back to hover above her. She kissed her once and put her head on Stella's shoulder.
„So, do I have to dress up?"
„You can wear whatever you like," Scully said and laughed.
„Isn't it all fancy dress?"
„No," Scully chuckled. „Well, unless you like the rest of the church-goers to frown at you. It's all a matter of respect to be dressed appropriately and for me it was never an option no to, especially not with my parents."
„That sounds very… strict."
„Or catholic," Scully laughed.
„I'll find something appropriate," Stella said. „But can we please have breakfast before we leave?"
„I like that," Scully said and helped Stella off the couch to make breakfast.
It was almost noon by the time they stepped out of that small church, various people pouring out onto the pavement in front of it. The sun was blazing already and there was not a single cloud in the sky.
Scully took a deep breath, feeling a little calmer than before. It wasn't exactly what she was used to from her time in DC but in the end it served its purpose and she was happy with it. She wasn't sure whether she would come back every Sunday but she might visit every now and then and reassure herself, establish some sort of routine in their daily lives.
„How did you even find this place?" Stella asked and took Dana's hand. „I've lived her for such a long time and I never noticed."
„I came across the church earlier this summer," Scully said and looked at her feet for a moment. „After you told me about William. I walked through the park and it was raining. I was tired and I didn't pay attention to where I was going and then I ended up here."
She smiled at Stella; she didn't want to cloud their morning with painful memories.
„I walked in and just sat there for a while, waiting for the tears to stop and I promised myself I'd come back at some point."
„I'm glad I joined you," Stella said and they started walking away from the church.
„So," Scully said. „How was it?"
„Well, I almost expected to burst into flames when I walked in but I survived."
Scully laughed and shook her head.
„It wasn't that bad," Stella said honestly. „But I'm not sure I'll be able to wrap my head around it."
„That's okay," Scully said. „You want to go for a walk in the park?"
„Yes, I'd love that."
A few minutes later they sat in the shade of a giant oak tree; Stella leaned against the trunk with Dana's head nestled in her lap. She played with a strand of her hair and smiled.
There was a gentle breeze surrounding them and Scully watched a few kids playing soccer in the distance. Slowly the park was filling with families who came out of their homes to enjoy the gorgeous weather as long as it lasted. It might as well start raining in a few hours and if Scully wasn't mistaken there was supposed to be a thunderstorm later.
With no cloud in sight and nothing to worry about at the moment they were just two people among many others, having a nice time in the park.
„Dana, did you ever think about going back to Washington?" Stella asked, her left hand gently tickling her scalp.
„You mean for good? Or for a vacation?"
„Just for a visit," Stella said.
„It never occurred to me before," she admitted. „Not until Charlie mentioned it after your party."
„Did he?"
„When we met for lunch the day after," Scully explained. „I think he mentioned going home at some point. It surprised me because he seemed to be the last person I'd ever see going back there."
„Didn't he leave at a very young age?"
„Yes, that's why I was surprised."
„Maybe it'll do him good or it'll help to put an end to whatever is troubling him."
„I wish I knew," Scully said softly.
„What about you then?"
„I think it would be nice to go back. Just for a couple of days, my childhood home is still there and it is still ours."
„Did you have a nice childhood?"
„It wasn't always easy but it wasn't terrible either," Scully said and took a deep breath. „We moved around a lot until we finally settled outside of Washington DC. I have fond memories of my childhood as well as terrible ones."
She already knew about Stella's childhood and that far too many things had gone wrong so she chose not to ask further questions until Stella was ready to talk.
„I don't think I would like to move back to the US," Scully said. „I like it here in England. We moved around a lot when I was young and it was hard to feel at home somewhere so I was happy to find my place. I'm afraid that, if I leave England, I won't feel at home in Washington either."
„I understand that," Stella said.
„The thing is," Scully said and sat up, leaning against the trunk beside Stella. „I don't want to leave because I feel pretty much at home here and I have everything I need."
She leaned in and kissed Stella, her thumb gently brushing over her cheek. Scully looked in her eyes, thinking that she saw unshed tears glistening in them for a brief moment.
„Dana," Stella said softly, biting her lip.
She felt a little taken off guard by the confession that wasn't new because she had heard it before and yet it somehow stirred something inside of her. She still had something on her mind and, whenever she didn't doubt it, she was simply too nervous to utter the words that would most certainly change both of their lives forever and she was hoping it would be for the better.
„What is it?" Scully asked and smiled.
How easy would it be to ask her now, she thought and remembered that she didn't bring the ring. Maybe she'd wait until their anniversary in September. They weren't official back then but the day they had first met was the night it all started to change. It was still almost four weeks away and Stella thought she wouldn't be able to hold on until then but she had not yet come up with a better plan.
„I was just thinking of the very first time I kissed you," Stella whispered against her lips and leaned in for a kiss.
„I'll never forget that," Scully whispered between chaste kisses and smiled.
They stayed in the park for a little while longer, just enjoying each other's company until it was time to go home and prepare lunch. It'd be a quiet afternoon and by the time the distant sound of thunder disturbed the silence Scully was laying on the bed, reading a book for the very first time in what felt like years while Stella was replying to emails from work.
She had a never ending, constantly growing pile of books that she intended to read and most of them have been left untouched, gathering a fine layer of dust while they had been neglected.
For some reason she had always been busy or considered herself too restless to actually sit down and read a book but tonight she did. What she had picked up was the bittersweet and tragic love story of two childhood friends, Ronit and Esti, who had grown up in an Orthodox Jewish community in Hendon, not too far from where they were actually living.
Scully had felt drawn to it right from the start, finding herself unable to put it down. She lost herself in the book while the hours passed by and was confronted with a variety of emotions, ranging from anger and affection to longing and sadness.
She didn't know how their story would end but at some point she chose to take a break as her eyes grew tired. She left the book behind, still feeling strangely bothered by what she had just read and the injustice she felt, to make a cup of tea and sit with Stella.
She didn't know how the book would end but she certainly had an idea of what their future would look like.