Chapter 35: The Insomniac and the Nagger Part 4

"So that's why you have to help me!" Yamanobe-sensei pleaded. "I need you guys to learn how to play this game!"

"Yamanobe-sensei, is this like last time when we helped you?" Himeko asked hesitantly.

Because the last time the geography teacher had approached Sket Dance for help, he had roped them into playing this inane ball game in hopes of attracting students into joining his Genesis club. The problem had been that were no students in their right mind who would ever consider joining.

Smocks had decided to break the news to the man, seeing that there had been no point in further encouraging his delusion, but she had only received a scolding from Bossun for her well-intentioned efforts. How unfair was that? But that hadn't meant that she had been in the wrong in the end. Ultimately, they had learned all the rules, had become bona fide players, and had exemplified their newly acquired skills in front of any passing students. It had been a humiliating experience.

"Well, sort of… But you're the only ones who I can ask!" Yamanobe-sensei exclaimed. "This time, it's a board game. Bossun-kun, you're good at things like this. And, Switch-kun, you like games, don't you?"

"Yes, I adore crappy games!" Switch typed.

"Okay, okay, back it up!" Bossun interjected. "I don't even know what game we're talking about here."

"Like I said, it's Hyperion!"

"Like I said, what is it!?"

In the midst of Yamanobe-sensei's lengthy explanation, the door slid open with a crash. Marching in as though he owned the place was Tsubaki.

"What the heck!" Bossun cried. "Who said that you can just walk in?"

"Silence," Tsubaki commanded. "I have no time to listen to your usual drivel. I require Kongo-san's presence in the student council room immediately." When his eyes landed on the teacher, he quickly executed a bow and politely said, "Hello, sensei."

"Hello, Tsubaki-kun."

"You don't get to decide that!" Bossun rose onto his feet, scowling at Tsubaki.

Tsubaki straightened up and matched Bossun's glare with his own. "Hmph. You dare defy orders from the student council?"

"Quit speaking as though you're some head poncho of this place!"

"Excuse me, but I happen to be speaking on the authority of the student council—in other words, the right of power granted to us by the principal, who, as you would call, is the head poncho."

"Shut up! Just—just because you got power by proxy doesn't mean you get to exert it!"

"What I just said implies that."

"Sh-shut up!"

"Um, what's going on?" Yamanobe-sensei inquired bemusedly.

"I-it's nothing, sensei," Himeko assured. She then turned towards Smocks and whispered, "I thought your session with the Vice-prez was at a later date."

Smocks thought so too. Unless she misheard Tsubaki or didn't read his recent notification of a schedule change, they weren't supposed to be meeting up today. Although, if they were, she wouldn't mind; anything to get out of the teacher's dumb game would be a relief even if it meant putting up with Tsubaki's nagging.

"You don't even do anything worthwhile. What issue would it be if I borrow her for today?" Tsubaki said exasperatedly.

"Hah, well, sucks for you! We happen to have a mission here, so buzz off!" Bossun retorted.

"I actually need the boys for this one, so it'd be okay if you take Smocks-kun," Yamanobe-sensei piped up.

"Wait, what?" Himeko frowned. "Why just the boys?"

"Ah, you see… For some reason, the game can only be played by men."

"Huh?"

"This is one of the two great mysteries of Hyperion," he said. "That isn't to be said that women cannot play, but, for some reason, they're unable to enjoy it in the slightest. Men, on the other hand, seem to take to it with remarkable enthusiasm."

"I'm convinced," Smocks said, standing up. "You guys have fun."

"What? Smocks!"

"Well, I'm not!" Himeko burst out. "I don't know what this crazy game is about, but I'm not gonna be left behind. I'm gonna play!"

"Oh my… Himeko-kun, just right now, you're brimming with such enthusiasm!"

"Let's get out of here," Smocks told Tsubaki, ushering him out.

"How's your arm, by the way?"

Smocks gave him a look. "You do realize that you ask me that every time we meet up, right?"

Tsubaki gave her a reproving frown. "Only because you refused to go to the hospital to get the checkup! Who knows what germs that knife could have been infested with? It's only a miracle that you didn't need to amputate your arm days after not getting yourself admitted."

"And I'm still not going." While the first hospital visit had been under confidentiality, the checkup required her parents' notice, which was something that Smocks was going to prevent from happening.

"Oh, what issue would it be if your parents are made aware?" he sighed.

"Do you know what's it like having strict parents?"

"Yes, my own parents are like that." Tsubaki paused and stared at the younger girl contemplatively. "Are you saying that your parents would be fretful?"

Of discovering that their daughter had been stabbed? Wouldn't any parent be? "In an overbearing manner? Yes."

"If that's the case, then I'll confront them and let them know that the incident was because of me. I'll take the blame."

Smocks always liked chivalry in a guy, but Tsubaki clearly wasn't getting it. "Sure, you can let them yell at you, but then they'll yell at me too for getting involved in the first place."

"Surely they'll come to an understanding that situations like the Spider's Association are largely uncommon. Not to mention that the danger was an oversight," he admitted a tad sheepishly.

If he was so certain that her parents would be that amenable, then Smocks doubted that his parents were as strict as hers. "Are you sure your parents are strict?"

"You want me to give you a list?" he countered drly.

Oh gosh. He had a list?

Even if she wanted him to, they already arrived. Smocks gave Tsubaki a shrug, who responded with an eyeroll. He opened the door and entered with a "I'm back."

"Heeey, Smocks," Agata greeted her as she followed after Tsubaki.

"Ugh," she greeted back.

Avoiding another of the president's jibes of reminding her of how she had boldly lied to his face about his sweet baby sister having a boyfriend, Smocks forced herself to interact with the closest person she could reach within seconds.

She was hoping to aim for Unyuu, but the first-year instead got stuck with Daisy. Their conversation went one-sided, obviously.

After Tsubaki returned with the needed papers, he had everyone sit in their respective spots. Smocks even had a seat reserved just for her despite not being an official member of the student council. The perks of being babysat by the vice-president, Smocks supposed.

"President, if you would," Tsubaki prompted.

"Right." Agata propped his elbows and loosely intertwined his fingers, mimicking a CEO at a conference table. "As you already know, we have another organization to bust. This time, these guys are running a drug dealership."

Just where do these people get their intel? Did Shinba go undercover again?

"What kind of drugs?" Unyuu asked.

"Nicotine," Agata said gravely.

"These students are smoking?" Smocks said aloud. "That's an issue?"

"Wh-what on earth are you talking about, Kongo-san?" Tsubaki said, appalled. "Of course, that's an issue! Students shouldn't get addicted to cigarettes, especially not at a young age!"

"It's just that…Sket Dance and I sometimes run into delinquents and they're usually smoking. I thought that, if they got away smoking for this long, then the student council just didn't deem it that big of a problem."

There was a moment of silence.

"Kongo-san, why didn't you report this kind of information to me in the first place?" Tsubaki cried out, slamming his hands on his desk. The papers flew up in the air.

She just said that she thought it wasn't a problem. Goodness, was Tsubaki always this poor in listening?

Agata laughed. "I see that our network isn't all that reliable."

"Hey, I try," Shinba protested.

"I know, man, but we obviously need to do better, which is why we have our sneaky mouse here to be our eyes and ears." With that said, Agata smirked at Smocks.

"I don't see what this has to do with Sempai trying to fix my sleeping habits," Smocks said. Or why he continued to drag her here at all.

"If you run yourself ragged, then you'd become tired enough to sleep at night."

"That's not really my intention," Tsubaki grumbled.

"Besides," Agata continued, "you're quiet, small, and unassuming enough to reach places that we wouldn't be able to. We need someone like you to do the council's espionage."

Smocks rubbed her arm. "If this is anything like the time when I got stabbed…"

"No, nothing of that sort. We'll deal with the violence. All you have to do is learn what you can and report back to home base."

While she was appeased by the idea of no longer being used as bait, she remained unwilling to go through it just yet. "What's in it for me?"

"Access to coffee maker in the teachers' lounge."

"I suppose I have no choice," Smocks surrendered.

Tsubaki gawked at Agata. "How is that supposed to help her sleep properly!?"

"I don't know how else to convince her to join her cause aside from taking advantage of her caffeine addiction," the president confessed with no shame. He shrugged. "Unless you know something that we don't?"

Tsubaki frowned and didn't say anything.

"Well, that's that."

Unknown to Smocks, Tsubaki considered using her parents against her. She had continuously voiced her displeasure of allowing her parents to know what had transpired. She had even mentioned how she didn't tell them about her joining Sket Dance, knowing that they wouldn't approve. He knew for certain that her parents were her weaknesses.

But Tsubaki kept his lips sealed. He knew that he could make Smocks compliant if he extorted her, but he wouldn't do that. It wouldn't be right to use the information that she had confided to him against her. After all, he was Tsubaki Sasuke, the vice-president of the student council and Smocks's responsible upperclassman. He was too chivalrous to sink that low.