Chapter 36: Park Benches and Self Reflection
My POV
It had been a weird week, going through all the motions of a regular day in my morning routine. But for some reason, not apparent to me, things were about to get better; though they hadn't started out so peachy.
Flashback
"Just come to bed. It's late." Brian says, patting the vacant space next to him. We had been in my sister's old room. It could accommodate better for two than my room could. It must have been around 2AM. I was restless, pacing throughout the floral dominated room. "I won't be able to sleep. I'm wired." I say, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Okay. I just want you to be okay for tomorrow. Emotions will be running higher than normal." He says ominously, sitting up rubbing my back and whispering with soothing words. "Alright. Goodnight." I say, kissing him quickly and getting under the covers, still unable to sleep. Left with nothing but my thoughts until morning came
"Morning!" I say to no one, discovering that Brian isn't in bed. I get out of bed and stretch my hands over my head, my joints crackling like embers in a roaring fire.
"Hello?" I ask, walking through the room and then downstairs. "Brian?" "He's not here." My sister says, pouring cereal into a bowl and walking to the fridge to pour milk. "He left a note though." She says, grabbing a spoon and taking a bite of Cheerios.
I walk to the pot rack and unclip the note, sealed in a blue envelope. I begin to read it.
Gee,
You're gonna hate me, but this is for the best. I cheated on you. I've been seeing another girl. Her name's Julia. I started seeing her during that crazy time we were apart. I kept it going, she didn't mind the long distance thing. Enclosed is my ring. I don't feel right wearing it anymore. I love you, but I don't expect you to love me anymore. Hell, I hate me. And I hate that I did this to you. So if you're gonna hate me, you have every reason to. I'm sorry ~ B
"That arrogant motherfucker." I mumble, crumpling the paper up and tossing it over my shoulder. I quickly go upstairs and change into sweats. With my frizzy hair in a bun I rush back down the stairs, taking two at a time. "Are you okay?" My sister asks, arms folded over her chest, concern growing in her eyes. "I'll be fine. I just need to clear my head." I say, opening the door and bolting down the street, running as fast as my stocky legs can take me.
My sneakered feet squeak as I trample over the cold pavement, breathing faster as my lungs began to burn. I ran until I nearly collapsed, at the park 3 miles outside of my neighborhood. It becomes harder to breath as my vision is blurred by my silent sobbing. I stop at a park bench and start hyperventilating, my knees becoming weaker with every step. I suddenly hear myself speaking. "Can I talk to you?" I ask, tears clouding my vision. "Sure." Zig says turning, a wide smile plastered on his face that began to fade, fast. "Gigi, why are you crying?" He asks, rushing to my side. I mustered all the courage I could gather and began to speak once more. "Brian and I broke up. I mean, we were pretty much fighting every day and well, he doesn't understand." I say, rolling up my sleeves and wiping away my tears. His fingertips glide over the ridged scars on my arm. "Woah. I." I hadn't even noticed I was showing them off. It had been such an off morning. I mean, its not like I wanted him to see them, but he has a right to know right?
"Oh yeah, I'm a real winner. Go insecure me!" I say, tears welling up once more. "Come on, sit down. What's wrong?" He asks, digging a tissue from his pocket and handing it to me. I take a deep breath before beginning, my voice shaky. "He gets mad at me when I don't do things his way and has stopped caring. I feel like I'm back living with mom. Oh wait, she's dead." I say, throwing my hands in the air and trying to keep back tears."Come on. Lets get out of here." He says, standing and putting a consoling arm around my waist as we walk away from the park. Away from my fleeting thoughts and inconsolable crying.
Reality
I sit back in my bed, headphones in and music turned up all the way, blaring into my ears. I escape to a state of peace and serenity, my foot tapping to the rhythm of the music. "Hey. Can I come in?" Zig asks, knocking on the slightly open door to my room. I'd taken a shower and gotten into my fuzzy polka dot pants. "Sure." I say, taking my earbuds out and sitting cross-legged on my bed. "Can I join you." He asks, a smile playing on his lips. "Sure." I say, cracking my knuckles and making room for his tall frame.
"Are you gonna be okay?" He asks, furrowed brows and all. "I hope so. I've been through worse." I say, throwing my legs onto his lap and stretching out over my bed. "You're drifting space cadet, you gonna make it?" He asks, his smile growing. "I just need to get some sleep... can-can you stay with me?" I ask, a pout in the works. "I'm not going anywhere." He says, grabbing a nearby pillow and placing it under his head. I look into his soft green eyes, then down to my hand, quickly removing the ring Brian had given me. So long Brian Bierl, nice knowing ya.
So, hey guys! With finals just around the corner I have had zero time to do anything. I churned this out when I should have been studying (whoops). Anyway, This is the last chapter of this story. I will be doing a continuation, but in another story. Time for new beginnings, have a great day Degrassians