Chapter Thirty-Seven: You Have My Heart, You Are My Love

Ashland, Wisconsin, October 1921

Carlisle

Ashland's general hospital – St. Joseph's – was a four storey, red brick building, with an imposing red tower nearby. The very first thing one would view of the hospital, was the Lord's cross at the very top of the tower, and every time my eyes fell upon that beautiful symbol of sacrifice and love, I'd close my eyes and raise a thankful prayer to the Lord above. Although I had experienced the long bout of loneliness, when it was easy to fall into the pit of self-pity, I knew deep down that no matter how alone I may be, my life was never empty. My work at the hospital was proof enough of that. However, now that I had a son and a loving fiancée – my heart swam with such glee at the mere thought of Esme Anne Platt being my fiancée – it was obvious to anyone that my life was positively brimming with love and joy. I had never once felt quite so full. I thought of the cross then, as I walked the quiet wooden halls of the old building, and I was momentarily saddened that I'd not be able to see it from the small window in my office on the very top floor. There was a beautiful side to faith, one that the faithless may struggle to see, of the true and sincere love between the Lord and His children. Although I felt Him always, my days were filled with stray moments that His presence was almost tangible by my side. Strangely, those moments had been more frequent when Esme was also by my side. Perhaps it was the happiness that made this so, perhaps I could feel His love more when I could feel hers, or perhaps that was His way of telling me He'd sent her to my side, that I had done the right thing by changing her – or as she'd put it, by saving her life. I'd like to think that was true. Although my father – the priest – would have disapproved strongly of my marrying a woman who knew no faith, my Father – the Lord – gave His blessing, I knew. For it was plain as day to anyone who met her, although Esme knew no faith herself, she was one of the Lord's finer creations. It was her who cemented my faith in the fact that as vampires we retained a soul, because it was impossible that she should not have one. Edward too, for that matter. I knew Esme's soul, and I loved it more than I thought possible. They truly were the three things that made my life full. Esme, Edward, and the Heavenly Father, all the rest was just the garnishing on top. I could live a full and happy life if I were not practising medicine, but truly and fervently hoped I would never have to experience that.

I climbed another flight of wooden stairs, and gazed at another length of white wall, as I made my way to my office. I admired the colour of the sky outside when I reached the third floor, and was able to look out the window once again. The world had kept on turning, as promised, and the first hints of the morning twilight were lightening the horizon. I checked my watch, it was six o'clock, one more hour and then I'd be leaving for home. I sighed, the emergency room was quiet, and I had a pile of paperwork to work my way through, yet I'd rather be home with Esme. What was that woman doing to me? I grinned at the thought of the happiness she'd brought into my life. My smile, however, quickly faded as I meandered into hearing range of a particular conversation I never fancied hearing.

"You know I think it's just a ruse," Ruby chirped flippantly, "I don't think she's real. It's probably just made up by some lady who he turned down."

I heard another woman – undoubtedly Mable – sigh heavily, before she replied in a very wary tone, "So it didn't go well with Jimmy last night?" Papers ruffled as I imagined Ruby – blonde hair and brown eyed, with a few too many buttons on her uniform undone – shooting daggers at the older woman's uninterested expression.

"It went just fine with Jimmy, thank you very much."

"But you're still hung up over Doctor Cullen, aren't you Ruby?" Mable's voice had an edge to it that I had never heard before. I tried not to listen to their voices as I approached – which was an unfortunately inevitable thing if I were to get this paper work done – but the muted noise from all other directions was too quiet to drown out the women's voices. Fighting against my vehement desire to turn around and walk the other way, I carried down along the corridor, gazing out at the dark sky.

Ruby sighed wistfully, "Who isn't?"

"Well, I'm not," the older woman replied matter-of-factly, "I know when the game is over. Doctor Cullen has a sweetheart and I'm keeping my nose out of it."

"Oh Mable," Ruby sighed exasperatedly, "You give up too quickly." She paused and considered Mable's words for a moment, "I'm not complaining though, it means less competition for me."

Mable laughed sarcastically, "Yes, as if you ever saw me as a threat, Ruby."

I had to stifle a grin at Ruby's words, if only she had met Esme, then she'd really see the reason my heart had been irreversibly taken by such a sweet soul. I took a deep breath as I reached the end of the corridor, and willed myself to face the inevitable task of walking passed them. It was, perhaps, one of the most unpleasant aspects of my job. Nurses.

I was met by two sets of bulging eyes when I had mastered the confidence to turn the corner, and then quickly afterwards, the surprised eyes turned into two different smiles. One was flirtatious, and the other was welcoming, unsurprisingly, I returned the latter.

"Doctor Cullen!" Ruby exclaimed gleefully, as she righted herself out of her leaning pose against the wall, and tried miserably to make it look as though she was being productive.

"Doctor Cullen," Mable nodded afterward, still smiling warmly. It was not in my nature to ignore such smiles, so my welcoming grin in return, stayed upon my face.

"Ladies," I murmured politely with a slight nod, "How are we?"

Ruby beamed, and blinked a few times, jutting one hip out to the side, "All the better for seeing you!" She spoke in a high-pitched voice that hurt my over sensitive vampire ears.

Mable shot her a disapproving glance, and then turned back to me, her expression was almost apologetic, "Well thank you, Doctor. And yourself?"

"I am very well thank you," I murmured, not once stopping since I'd rounded the corner. I managed to get perhaps a foot passed them before Ruby jumped out and grabbed my arm.

"Doctor Cullen?"

I pursed my lips at the contact, and she let go. Raising my eyebrows I met her eyes, "Yes?"

Her heartbeat accelerated at my gaze, and I mentally chided myself for being so careless. Eye contact with a vampire could induce one of two things, fear – which I was never very good at accomplishing, or fascination – which I always seemed to manage. I blinked quickly, breaking her gaze, and fixed my eyes upon her nose. It was not nearly as adorable as Esme's.

"Have you heard of the new club that opened up in Duluth the other week? I can't stop thinking about how nice it would be to go dancing there one day!" She asked wistfully.

I smiled noncommittally, "If dancing is something one likes, then I'm sure it would, I can't say I'm much of a dancer myself. The ball was a little too much for me the other month. I think I've had enough dancing for the remainder of the decade."

Mable chuckled, "I know what you mean."

I gave her a smile, I had observed Mable's two left feet at the dinner weeks back. I could imagine her distaste for dancing would be quite strong; mine however, was just the opposite. I was merely very selective of my partner – I could think of only one woman I would ever love to dance with.

"Oh, that's a shame," Ruby sighed moving back to the nurse's station and gathering her papers, "I thought it would have been fun to go as a group. My sweetheart and I, your sweetheart and you. No matter. Perhaps I'll see if Doctor Gregson and his wife like to dance."

I smiled and nodded, moving to turn away, but Ruby stopped me again, "I say, Doctor Cullen, my lady friends and I gather once a month for luncheon in town, and I was wondering if perhaps you could pass on my invitation to your Anna? Us ladies are positively dying to meet her." Ruby was a fantastic actress, but my heightened senses could see the malice hidden deep in her eyes. I knew very well that the female population of Ashland was dying to meet Esme – or Anna, as they so thought she was called – but I also knew that Ruby most certainly did not want my sweetheart at her luncheon. She merely wanted me to admit that I had a sweetheart, not that the fact would in anyway halt her advances. I hoped Esme wasn't to attached to the idea of seeing Ashland by day, I feared her presence would attract too much attention, and there was the matter of her being supposedly dead. There would be a great deal of trouble if someone were to recognise her. We would have to go somewhere else, no matter, Washburn was close enough, and it was smaller, so the thirst would bother her less.

I gave Ruby a tight smile, merely professional, I hoped she understood my body language, "Thank you for your offer, Nurse Simmons, however, Miss Masen is unwell and as much as I think a luncheon would cheer her up, she's truly not fit enough to be out of the house, and I doubt Mr. Masen would agree to accompany her to such a do, even if she were not as ill as she is at the moment. I'll pass on your sentiments to her."

After recovering from her momentary nose disjointment, Ruby smiled and took my rejection graciously, "Thank you, Doctor Cullen. I hope she finds herself in good health again very soon."

I gave her a small nod before I turned around, silently thanking the Good Lord in Heaven that she had done the same. My thanks were, however, quite premature, for mere moments later, when I had not managed to get very far away at all, I was interrupted by a small scream, the sound of papers flying everywhere, and the nasty smack of a body landing on wood. I turned around to see Ruby lying on the floor. This was a particular ploy I had seen many nurses employ over the years. If you could not get a man to be gentlemanly to you on his own merits, you must then force him to do so. Part of my mind contrasted Esme to Ruby, how her personality was so much more desirable, she possessed strength of spirit that never saw her throwing herself on the floor for attention.

Doing my obligatory gentlemanly duties, I rushed over to Ruby and helped her up. She blushed at the contact, and tried to catch my eye, but I made it exceptionally obvious that I was helping her in a strictly professional manner, "Are you all right, nurse?"

I let her go as soon as she was standing on two feet once more, and she nodded, then laughed in what must have been intended as an alluring way. If only she knew the way to my heart would have been with a witty comment, like Esme would have made.

"Oh yes, I'm just clumsy." She blushed, and I ignored the extra heat in the air, and the increased potency of her blood. It was just as mouth-watering as any other human's, but after a quarter of a millennia, I was accustomed to denying my thirst.

"Did you trip?" I wondered, examining the floor behind her.

"Yes, on thin air it seems." She giggled, trying to reach out for my arm as she pretended to steady herself.

I caught Mable's disapproving glance, and gave her a knowing smile.

"Perhaps you should stay away from the dancing circuit then, nurse. Just until your equilibrium is restored to normal, these things happen. Have you experienced a fever lately? Sore ears?"

"Uh, no?" Her brow furrowed, my questioning was throwing her off her prepared design of how to woo Carlisle Cullen.

"Hmmm, perhaps it was just a moment of clumsiness then, I have work to do, but I can find another doctor to look over you, if you would like?"

Ruby's demeanour finally frosted over, sensing my detachment, "No, thank you. I am fine."

I stepped back and nodded, "Very well then, do be more careful nurse. Those incident reports are awfully long to fill out." Giving them both a farewell smile, I left, trying my best to avoid my escape appearing too desperate and rushed.

"He didn't buy that for a second," I heard Mable whisper to Ruby, who huffed.

"If I see this Anna Masen, she better watch out. She'll trip on the sidewalk and break her pretty little nose if I had my way." Ruby snarled, and I fought the urge to growl, which was a natural reaction to ones mate being threatened, even though Esme was in no danger at all.

"You think Doctor Cullen would change his mind about her if she had a broken nose? You are aware that noses heal, aren't you? Because if you aren't, I may have to report you."

I sighed and hurried down the corridor, round the corner and up the stairs, so I was far enough away to avoid the remainder of their conversation. It was a great relief when I found myself alone in my office. I relaxed in my chair and pulled out the papers I needed to finish, quickly forgetting the nurses downstairs, in favour of filling my mind with medicine and my family. Never had my mind known a place so filled with peace. When the clock chimed seven o'clock, and the morning twilight was in full swing, I ducked out of my office and dashed down to the ground floor, mercifully missing more of my colleagues. I sent a prayer of gratitude to the Lord when my eyes fell on the tall cross, and jumped in my car with excitement bubbling in my veins, making it a hard task to move slow.

I quickly navigated my way out of the center of Ashland town, away from the giant redbrick building, and depressed the gas pedal lower when my tyres hit the rural roads leading to our small house. As I drove, I became intoxicated by the fait remainders of her scent that whirled around the car from the night before, and the passenger seat suddenly became noticeably empty. I couldn't help but picture her beside me, perched on the edge of the seat, looking around wide-eyed as she devoured the sunrise drenched landscape with her hungry eyes. The morning light was rising in yellows, pinks, and whites, behind the ever-present cloud cover. The gravel road beneath the tyres crunched in protest of the pressure as the Wisconsin winds blew through the golden trees. I could almost hear her soft voice whisper something wondrous about beauty. I tried to press the pedal down further, but it was down as far as it would go. As I drove impatiently my mind wondered back to the events of last night. I chuckled to myself, as I thought of my sitting on the couch in the early evening, trying to decide how I would ask her for her hand. I had pictured her standing by the shore of the small lake with the cove, as I whispered to her poetic promises of my undying love, but the thought had made me feel somewhat self-conscious. I'd then pictured the pair of us in the old church she'd found in the forest, her wearing one of her finer dresses, me in one of my finer shirts, together underneath the leafy canopy, her standing, me on one knee, ring in my fingers. I'd not decided on how I would ask her as I sat on the floor of her bedroom with my heart aching at her sadness. When she had clambered onto the floor in the most endearing way possible, the words had poured out of my heart in unstoppable waves. I couldn't help it, I needed to ask her, and then she said yes. The feeling of her accidently overbalancing me and her body lying atop mine as she clung to me for dear life, sobbing into my chest as though I could help her breathe was one of the best feelings I'd ever experienced. Truthfully, I had no reason to want anything about my proposal to be any different. Yet, some part of my mind was still annoyed that I didn't give her the romance I had planned. My darling little apple would have never asked for anything more, but she deserved to have everything. The impatience grew once more at the slow speed of the car, naturally, running would have been quicker, and it was a remarkably tempting idea to park the car on the side of the road and run, but I resisted said temptation in favour of propriety. I could almost see Esme's grin, and hear her quiet giggle teasing me.

Suddenly, the amount of graded potentials firing in my brain became enough to cross the threshold and my neurons fired. I knew exactly what to do for my little apple.

I quickly slowed the car and pulled over to the side of the road, hoping fervently that I was not in either of their hearing ranges, and slipped out of the car. I let the trees envelop me as I tried to find my bearings. I was not overly familiar with my distant neighbours property, but I did happen upon one gem in December of last year, when I came a little too close to my neighbour's house. The old man had an enormous property (I was unsure if even he knew the full size of it), and one very ferocious guard dog. I had made the mistake of meeting the poor guard dog on that fateful December day that I ran a little too close for comfort, and immediately his growls turned to whimpers, and he's not been the same since. I had only ever met our neighbour once, when he came into the hospital for treatment on his leg after he had suffered a fall, the poor man was nearly blind, and he was rapidly approaching eighty. It was truly miraculous he'd lasted that long. For that reason, I felt safe trespassing on his property, I was fairly certain he would not notice the few things that I had planned to steal.

Edward and Esme had never ventured into the forest on the right hand side of our driveway, instead always favouring to go straight out the back door, or to the right, so I was fairly certain they were oblivious to the hidden gem I had found there. I held my breath in hope that I was not too late to miss the harvest season. From the limited books that I had read I knew apples were reading for picking from August to October, but I fretted that the October apples would merely be the odds and ends.

Yes, my neighbour's hidden gem was a giant apple tree; I chided myself for not considering it before. Apples were the perfect solution.

The trees began to thin as the towering giant came into view. It sat in a small clearing, filled with rotting and bruised fruits. In a matter of seconds I had whipped around and cleared all the bad fruit away. I scaled the trunk and scoured the tree for the eleven most perfect apples that I could find. The tree was large and spacious inside, a maze of think branches and leaves that were still holding on to their green colour, and everywhere I looked an orb of red caught my eye. It did not take long for me to find the large fruits that I so desired, so I turned and ran back to the car at full speed, my arms brimming with ripe, red apples. I could almost hear Edward's laughter at the sight of his father dashing through the forest with stolen apples that he could never eat. He would either find this touching, or hilarious.

I carefully placed the fruits in the backseat, being careful not to bruise their delicate flesh, and clambered into the front seat, more excited now that I had been before. I depressed the accelerator to the floor once more and sped off down the gravel road toward our wooden home. I knew Edward could hear me before I could hear the piano, but I waited until the wheels turned onto the driveway before I informed him of my plan. I showed him the apple tree, and the route to get there, as well as the imagined visual that I had concocted of how this would look. I just need a short time to get it all prepared in the garage. Would you keep her busy for me? Give me a nod or a shake of your head when I get inside, but don't let her notice… She always notices. I heard him chuckle and I knew he was agreeing that she was observant, but of course, most vampires were.

I sped down the driveway and parked the car safely in the garage, not bothering to shut the door. Eagerly making my way toward the house, I couldn't help but let my excitement influence my speed. There were very few feelings that truly compared to that of coming home to a house filled with people who love you, after spending hundreds of years alone. I turned the doorhandle and slipped through the open door in one fluid motion, and there she was, walking down from the washroom, wearing her pink and white spring dress, which had – how did she describe it? 'A light, two-tiered lace trimmed overdress, with a long shawl collar and kimono sleeves, and a lace waist band over a darker slip-like dress,' she'd laughed and said, 'The catalogue called it dainty and becoming.' I had then called it beautiful, and kissed her head. It was especially beautiful when coupled with her ripped pink curtain as a hair ribbon, and her tiny shoe-less feet as she wore it now. She beamed at me as I gazed at her, positively awestruck.

"Hello," she murmured, failing to stifle a small giggle, the light caught the newest addition to her person, my ring, and my awestruck expression turned to one of glee, "How was your shift?" She wondered.

I opened my arms for her to walk into and she gladly did, "It was good, thank you, but I found I missed you terribly."

She reached up and took the hat off my head, putting it on the small table by the door, and then brushed the fallen hair out of my eyes, her expression was filled with tender joy and love, "I missed you too."

Edward sighed from the other room, causing Esme to giggle, she reached up on her tiptoes to quickly give me the softest kiss, like butterfly wings, before she pulled back and helped me take off my scarf. It was a strange – yet unbelievably welcome – new experience, having a woman welcome me home in such a way. Never before had Esme welcomed me home like this, like a wife welcomes her husband. The novelty feeling was something that I would very much like to experience for the rest of my days. Before I could sweep her in my arms and kiss her again, Edward appeared in the doorway. Esme placed my scarf with the gloves on the table, and as she did so, Edward gave me an infinitesimal nod. I beamed.

"I think that's a great idea, Carlisle." Edward murmured, and excited glint coming into his eyes.

Knowing this was how I'd get time to myself in the garage, I played along, "You do?"

He nodded, and looked to Esme, "Carlisle was just admiring your painting, and my piano, and he wondered how well either of us could do at the other's hobby. I think my painting skills for the small scale might be better than my painting skills for the large scale."

Esme and I both chuckled; remembering the one time Edward had painted the grass white.

"So what do you say, my lovely mother? Will you teach me to paint?" He wondered, his eyes so bright with excitement, I knew she'd have a hard time saying no.

She raised an eyebrow, "Now?"

He nodded, grinning, and she turned to look at me. I could see the longing in her eyes, I knew she wanted to spend time by my side, and I could see the question there too, would I be partaking in her painting lesson?

"I think it's a good idea, love," I tucked away the wayward tendril of her hair that I so dearly loved, "I have a few odd jobs that need doing in the garage, so would you mind if I pop out and quickly do them? Perhaps after we could light a fire and have a family day?"

She smiled, and nodded, I knew she wasn't overly thrilled with letting me go soon after I had come home, just as I was not overly thrilled either, but it was for a good cause, and she adored spending time with Edward.

"All right," she murmured, and turned to grin at Edward, "Perhaps you should put some old clothes on, darling. You do have a habit of getting things everywhere."

He chuckled, and dashed up the stairs, "Good idea."

Her lips pulled up into a lopsided smiled, "Perhaps I should too."

I laughed, "If you're going to be anywhere near him when he has paint, I would definitely recommended it. This dress is far too lovely let him stain."

She beamed up at me, and I ducked my head for another kiss, this time a much longer one, before remembering our son was in the house and listening. I shooed her up the stairs chuckling as she giggled, and made my way through the living room and into the study. I dug out a box of spare candles that I kept in case of emergency, and headed for the garage.

"I'll be back in soon," I murmured, exiting out the kitchen door. I bolted for the garage.

Half of me was excited to begin my preparation; the other half was impatient to get back to Esme. I tried my best to ignore the latter half, but it was a great struggle. If we were to find a balance in our lives, I knew we'd have to do it the hard way, by taking our time away from one another, and not constantly needing to be by the other's side. I ducked into the large shed we used as a garage, and manoeuvred passed the car to the small workbenches that lined the left wall of the building. The very last workbench, closest to the back wall of the garage was where I stored some ancient tools. I placed the candles on top of the worktop and retrieved the apples from the car. I placed them on top of a hay bail that lay near the corner. It was a lone group of hay bails, far away from those that dominated the back right corner of the garage, but near enough that the whole floor was coated in a thin layer of hay. Esme's mice squeaked quietly from their spot in the pile of hay across the room, and I smiled to myself at her unparalleled love. It was then that I turned the opposite way, and my eyes fell on another reminder of a different unparalleled love. If I said a prayer of gratitude every time that my eyes fell upon the cross at the top of the hospital's tower, then I said two when my eyes fell upon my father's wooden cross. Esme was yet to find it – or perhaps she had found it, and thought she better not ask – sitting in the very corner of the garage, underneath a small window that often shined heavenly light on the old wood. My father had carved it before my birth, and it was the only reminder of my human life that I allowed myself to carry with me. I wasn't entirely sure why, but I couldn't bring myself to let it go. I remembered my childhood days, bending before the cross where it hung in the vicarage and praying. I remembered that I prayed for peace for my father, constant peace, not just the fleeting peace he found when he carved. Perhaps that was why I carried the cross around, perhaps it reminded me of peace. It was always peaceful in the vicarage when I prayed, for the small church was empty side the Lord and I. That was how I liked it. I bent down on my knees in the hay before the cross and closed my eyes slowly, opening my mind fully to the Lord as I gave Him more thanks for my life. I had spent a very long time trying not to feel unhappy with the life I'd been given, after my transformation, but when the initial decades had passed I had begun to feel a strange sense of gratitude that I could not quite put my finger on. It irked my naturally curious personality, why did I feel grateful for being damned?

I mentioned this to Esme once, just in passing, and she had smiled, giving me the words I didn't know that I had waited centuries to hear, "It's because deep down you know that the Lord is telling you that you're not damned. You were given eternity to bring good to the world. That's why." She had stated it so simply, as though it was the most obvious thing to her.

For a person who knew no faith, she understood the Lord remarkably well. I think their common ground was in the way they loved unparalleled amounts.

Adding a millionth thank you for Esme and Edward, I murmured the familiar Amen and straightened myself. I reached for the draw on the end workbench. There were many specialised carving tools I took from my father's home once he'd passed, but I had not used them in a great long time. Carving never brought me the peace that it brought him; I found my peace in the pages of books. He'd taught me how to shape wood from a young age, however, and the skill was second nature to me. Mind you, I would not be requiring much skill today, so I reached for a simple knife before I closed the door, tucking the tools away once more. I moved back to the hay bails and took a seat, reaching for the first apple with a wide smiled upon my face.

I didn't quite factor in the juice of the apples… So I wasn't prepared to get as sticky as I did while I removed the core of the fruit and carved the small figures out of the red flesh. I was going to reek of fruit for days.

No matter, all in the name of love.

Once the apples were done I placed them in the box with the candles and snuck out of the garage. I could hear Esme and Edward laughing inside, a sound that made my heart fly. I slipped into the forest, hopefully unnoticed by Esme, and ran as fast as I could back to the apple tree. I happened a small creek on my way, which thankfully allowed me to remove the horrible sticky juice off of my marble skin, but it still didn't do away with the smell. I hoped Esme liked the smell of apples. I chuckled to myself at the thought, and then resumed my run to the tree.

Once there, I scaled it another time, and lined the apples up on a thick and mostly horizontal branch, before I placed a candle in the middle of each, and lit them with a match. The shade that the leaves cast on the inner space of the tree meant that the fire lit up perfectly, I just hoped the fire wouldn't end up lighting up the whole tree. That would be a mess to try and explain. Carlisle Cullen's first ever romantic gesture earns him a reputation as town pyromaniac and apple tree hater. Edward would never let me live it down.

Once I had arranged the first ten apples, I lit and hid the eleventh in a safe place for when Esme arrived – which I hoped would be before the candles went out. Edward knew to lead Esme to the tree only a short while after I had left the garage; I trusted he'd stick to the plan. Grinning to myself, I jumped out of the tree and hid the box in the surrounding forest before finally taking a seat.

I leaned up against the trunk and waited. Before long I heard the beautifully familiar footsteps flying through the forest. Ah, good. Edward kept to the plan. I listened intently to her as she approached. She missed every fourth step, my heart soared higher; she was doing her skipping-like-run. She was happy. I heard her sniff the air and I imagined her smile as she caught a whiff of my cinnamon and pear scent mixed with the freshly cut apples. Her brow would have furrowed at that last scent. I chuckled to myself quietly and I heard her speed increase. It didn't take long for my eyes to catch her pink and white dress lithely flying through the forest - she must have changed back into it, she knew it was my favourite - her caramel hair was falling out of its bun, her golden eyes were wide with glee and her lips was beaming.

"Carlisle!" She exclaimed as she reached the clearing.

"Hello, my darling," I replied casually, and gestured for her to join me.

Her eyes filled with longing at the idea, "Edward was waiting for me, I…" she trailed off, I could see understanding flood her features before she narrowed her eyes, "He's not waiting for me, is he?"

I shook my head.

"This is a set-up?" She wondered.

I nodded.

She giggled and shook her head at our antics, before dashing to my side and sliding down the trunk. She looked up to the tree above in wonder, "What is this place?"

"Our neighbour's apple tree." I murmured, transfixed by her beauty.

She shot me a grin, "It didn't even occur to me that we had neighbours. Do they know we're here?"

I shook my head, and she laughed, "You're trespassing, Doctor."

Grinning, I leaned in and whispered conspiratorially, "So are you, little apple."

She shook her head, "No I'm not. This is where I belong, with my fellow apples." She winked.

I laughed freely and wrapped my arm around her shoulder, and she lay her head on mine, before she sighed, my laughter sobered and I looked at her quizzically, "I feel a little silly for thinking that Edward truly wanted to learn to paint."

I felt guilty for deceiving her, especially while she was struggling so with her newborn emotions, "I'm sure he did. You know Edward, he's like me. We'll try anything."

She looked up and grinned wryly, "I think the word 'everything' is loosely applied there. I doubt you'd try to eat an apple."

I shrugged, "Well..."

She eyed me suspiciously, "Don't tell me you've tried an apple?"

I pursed my lips humorously, "I was intrigued."

Her bubbling laughter filled the small clearing, as she shook her head, "Oh, Carlisle. You really are like nothing else."

"This is a good thing, I hope."

"The very best," she grinned, tilting her chin up in her unspoken request for a kiss. I willingly obliged. I was fairly certain that I would never grow accustomed to kissing my darling Esme. As much as I enjoyed the feeling of her lips on mine, I equally relished in the knowledge that she enjoyed it all the same. I had worried, during my time in Volterra, should I have one day found a mate, that perhaps I would not be skilled at any kind of intimacy. Opening ones self up to another being was an unbelievably daunting thing after so long alone, yet with Esme, it was natural. Her presence calmed my soul.

Pulling away, she looked up at me curiously, "So why do you happen to be sitting underneath an apple tree? I would consider that you were channelling your inner Isaac Newton, but you don't have a book."

I raised an eyebrow teasingly; "I don't recall Mr. Newton having a book with him underneath his apple tree."

She smirked, "Oh, really? And am I hearing this from an eyewitness?"

I laughed, "Oh, very funny. Edward has been trying to convince you that I was the one who truly uncovered the secrets of gravity, hasn't he?"

"And Sir Isaac stole your idea, yes." She smiled fondly as I imagined her picturing Edward's face, "He would have made such a good lawyer, that boy. I swear, he could convince anyone that black is blue."

"And he'd take pleasure in that too."

She giggled, "I can't say I don't want him to. I like to see him happy."

"As do I. How did your painting lesson go, by the way?"

"Oh, quiet well, thank you. Edward wasn't much a fan of blending, so I think he's more inclined to paint like Picasso would have after a few pints."

I chuckled gleefully at her dry humour, never quite expecting it. She merely watched me with an amused glint in her eyes.

"I believe it is you, my darling," I pecked her nose, "Who is like nothing else."

She smiled and cuddled in closer to my side, "If you are not being Newton, what brings you to the apple tree? I assume you've been up it, you smell an awful lot like apple juice."

"I may have got a little on me," I replied warily, to which she giggled.

"You're sure you didn't go for a swim in it?"

My laughter joined in with hers, "I very nearly did. I didn't quite expect them to be so juicy."

She eyed me curiously, "What were you doing to get the juice all over you?"

I raised an eyebrow in challenge, "Would you like to see?"

She nodded eagerly, so I stood up and pulled her with me, "It's up there," I murmured pointing to the trees, "Shall we?"

She laughed somewhat self-consciously, "You'd better go first."

I glanced at her curiously, and understood immediately as she gestured to her dress. Nodding, I scaled the tree, quietly thankful that I had indeed gone first. The tree wasn't on fire. Good. I quickly grabbed the apple that I had stored behind a particularly thick branch, and hid it behind my back.

"Uh, Carlisle?" Esme wondered as she claimed.

"Love?"

"Why can I smell burning apples?" She sounded rather worried.

I chuckled, "You'll see." I knew my cryptic reply was sure to get her curiosity raging like a wildfire.

I watched her intently as she made her way into the center of the apple tree, her eyes betrayed the interest that I had hoped for, but I did not provide any answers, I merely smiled. When she came to a halt in front of me, she eyed my hidden hands suspiciously.

"Carlisle," she warned with a smile, in an endearing tone I was certain she must have used on her cutest naughty students, "What are you hiding?"

I gave her my best innocent look, which was effectively ruined by the large grin I could not wipe off of my face, and shook my head, before nodding to the scene in front of us that she had missed.

Curiously, she looked around, and I took a great amount of pleasure from the small breath I heard escape her lips, and the sight of her doe eyes widening. She was silent for a moment, as she gazed ahead, and I grinned, proud of my handiwork.

She stared at the ten de-cored apples with candle-lit letters cut out of them, as I pulled the eleventh apple from behind my back. She didn't turn around to see what the final once said; her attention was too focussed on the two words that she saw.

"Esme Cullen," she whispered reading the fruit. The sound of her name mixed with mine on her tongue welcomed back the addictive feeling of my stomach lurching and my chest exploding.

She whirled around, with her hand on her heart and her wide eyes a liquid pool of love and surprise.

"Oh, Carlisle, I..." She trailed off as her eyes fell down to the apple in my hands that made her new name into a question.

I smiled at her awed face, "So what do you think? How does that sound?"

Her free hand flew up to her cheek as she slowly raised her head to meet my gaze, I could almost see the tears that would have been in her eyes, once upon a time.

"I think it sounds like a dream come true," she whispered, her voice barely audible in her emotion.

I beamed, "Me too."

She laughed at the memory of my proposal.

"I know I already asked you, and it seems a little mawkish to be asking you twice, but I had really wanted to do something special when I asked for your hand. Last night... I just couldn't wait any longer, I couldn't help myself," I let out a self-conscious laugh, "Then I thought to myself, you deserve both the proposal borne out of true emotion, and that borne from a fairytale."

Her smile was dazzling, "You spoil me!"

I grinned and nodded, "That's part of the agreement." I laughed, and let my eyes melt into hers, "When I first bought your ring, I thought about lining the sides of the cove with candles and reciting poetry, I even had one picked out, then I thought that was a little too over the top, so I considered taking you to our little church, and asking you traditionally, down on one knee, ring in my hands, heart on my sleeve. Then it dawned on me as I drove home, I knew exactly what to do for my little apple, I'd give her her Newton. I'd tell her that she doesn't have to stop falling, because I would never stop catching her. I'd tell her that I would be her savoir when gravity pulled her down, if that's what she wanted." I gingerly lowered myself down onto one knee, holding up the apple to her, "And then I'd ask her if she'd take the foolish wise man who wouldn't recite poetry to her by the lake, or traditionally ask her for her hand in a beautiful place, a man who could never take her out to dinner, or watch her hair turn grey, but a man who could love her with every inch of his being for the remainder of their shared eternity.

"See, I love you with everything that I have, and the one thing in this world that can make me truly happy is to see you happy. Esme, if you want adventures, and trees to climb, little lake coves, and birds to watch, if you want books and rooms to paint, or fires to sit in front of, it's yours. If you wanted to spend your day's waist deep in mud, then that's how I'll spend mine, if you want to swim to Europe and climb Mount Everest, or bathe in the Red Sea, I'll take you. I'd eat an apple if you'd ask me to, truly. But I know you love me enough not to ask that of me."

She laughed, and looked at me adoringly.

"Truly, my love, I will give you everything. But there are somethings, above all that I want to you to have. I want you to have a house that you can make a home, two men who adore you and are nothing without you, to love you unconditionally as your family, but more than that, I want to give you my name. So wherever you go, whenever we are, you will always know how much I love you."

She was quiet for a moment, as her chin began to tremble. "All those things are lovely," she murmured, "And they do make me happy, but do you know the one thing that makes me the happiest?"

I cocked my head to the side, preparing to assure her that I would find it straight away and bring it back to her, so she surprised me a little when she smiled and said, "You."

I beamed back at her once more, "And I am yours forever, my love. Right until the end of time, and even still then."

A sob escaped her throat as she beamed down at me, "Oh, Carlisle!"

"So, Mrs. Cullen doesn't seem like a half bad name?"

"It sounds like the very best name I could ever imagine, you have my yes again. Of course. Of course!" She shuddered with joy as I rose and scooped her up in my arms, spinning her around on the thin branch that supported us. She sobbed delicately in my arms, as she held me tight. And I got drunk on the idea of her becoming my wife.

Forever had never sounded so sweet as it did with her by my side, and I knew, no matter what we may have to face, no matter how uncertain or frightening this life may get, I would always have the safety and security of the one luxury that I would never believe I'd been lucky enough to receive. A woman whose soul was as pure as gold, as sweet as a summer's breeze, and as wild at Mother Earth herself. My soon-to-be wife. My soulmate. My mate. My Esme.

She pulled back quickly, "You're really not going to recite a poem?" She teased in a whisper.

I merely laughed and let the poetry of my lips against hers, speak everything that needed to be said.

A.N. Hi again! Thanks for all your lovely reviews! I'm glad most of you seemed to like the proposal (Sorry to those of you who didn't - I lost a few followers and favourites after that chapter :( Whoops!) So for those of you who wanted something a little more textbook romance, I had this one planned. As you may have noticed I'm not used to writing textbook romance, so it was interesting to try the whole candle romance thing, it wasn't the easiest for me, I re-wrote this a few times because some parts were just too cheesy for me. Even still now...LOL.

There was just one part of the chapter, which I'm planning on exploring later that I wanted to mention - When Carlisle comes home and Esme seems upset that he's going back out again, I don't think this is what always happens. All the other Cullen couples seem like they can't stand to be away from one another frequently, but Esme and Carlisle are away from each other so much while he works. I have heard a lot of people say that they think that Esme resents Carlisle for this in one way or another, and I know Esme is often portrayed as a very needy and dependent person, but I think she's the exact opposite. She was preparing to be a single mother, and being a single mother takes some intense strength and I think she is a very independent person, and of course she and Carlisle have a very selfless love, but I think they have such a relationship where they can be away from each other. This doesn't mean they love each other any more or any less than any of the other couples, whom I believe have the same strength of love (but I am a little biased toward the Dr and his Mrs) but merely that they have a different kind of love. In the Twilight novels they have an insanely strong bond, and they're very secure in that bond (which you would be after so long together). So what I really wanted to say, was that moment is purely because their relationship is so new and forever is such a strange concept to Esme, who is so young, she just wants to be with Carlisle. She is not afraid of being alone, she's naturally a very self-secure person in many respects, which may be currently effected still by Charles' emotional abuse. I just felt like I needed to make that known, you may disagree, but hey, difference is what makes our world beautiful!

Again, thanks for you reviews, favourites and follows, you guys are awesome!

Much love x