Previously…

I finally feel like I can see the light at the end of the tunnel and I see us at the end as a family. I look into her eyes and somehow I know this is all going to work out and be ok. I had a dream the other night, I didn't tell her but it was a dream about us and we were on a beach somewhere and Gabriel was around 2.

He was on my hip as we walked hand and in hand through the waves of the ocean. We stopped to look at the sunset and I looked down in her arms was a beautiful little girl. She couldn't have been more than a few weeks old. She was beautiful just like her mother. I reached to caress her little cheek and my wedding band caught the light. It felt so real. I want it to be real and I'm going to keep it my secret for now because I have a feeling it wasn't a dream at all.

Bella's POV

It's been a week since the Jasper incident. Edward and I have discussed a lot of things and I feel like I've actually gotten closer to him. I have learned about his childhood and many things I didn't know. I've told him about mine the one I kept hidden for so long. There are no secrets between us anymore. I was waiting on Alec when I felt his presence I turned.

He leaned next to me on the balcony.

"You wanted to see me?" He said facing me.

"I want to see my parents." I said ready to move on with my life. It was time to go home and get back to the real world. He nodded and looked off.

"Have you spoken with Edward about Jasper being there?"

"No, actually I've done some thinking and I want Edward there. I don't think I need Jasper." I said with a shrug. I didn't miss the small smile that played on Alec's face.

He looked at me.

"A very wise decision, I am glad you have already started with boundaries. Bella you are very strong and you can do this with Edward by your side you can do anything." He said taking my hand.

I don't know what he meant about boundaries, but I could see the sincerity in his eyes. He patted my hand.

"It will be difficult and I am here if you need me, always. Your relationship with Jasper may be strained I can't say. You may feel fine with each other though your partners may not feel so."

"I can understand that." I said looking down sadly. I felt the guilt overcome me. Edward had every reason to be uncomfortable with the situation and so did Alice. I just hoped she didn't hate me when I got home.

"Bella, it needed to be done. It is over and now you are past it give Edward time the heart recovers but it isn't overnight. It could be days, months, even years."

He released my hand and walked to his desk.

"I have plane tickets for you to get you where you need to go. Arrangements have been made for you in Forks. I believe everything you need will be at your disposal."

I nodded and looked back up at him.

"Thank you Alec, you gave me my life back." I said honestly.

He winked, "Just a day at the office."

I laughed and hugged him tightly. He rubbed my back.

"Remember Bella, you can always call. I am always here for you and you must continue your therapy. It doesn't end here you have to continue to keep communication open. You can't bottle feelings inside. Under no circumstances are you to use Jasper as a therapist am I making myself clear?"

"Crystal." I smirked.

"Good." He chuckled. "I love the boy, but he has a heart the size of Texas and he wears it on his sleeve."

I turned to leave and he grabbed my arm.

"Bella if you need to talk I would prefer you call me or your therapist. It really is best you don't involve Jasper in any part of your life other than socially. He is just too close and if you or he push the envelope… I don't know that either of you at some point down the road wouldn't cross the line. He doesn't need to know anything about your therapy or personal issues. Don't let him."

I nodded but he didn't release my arm. The look in his eyes was serious.

"Bella I need your word on this. I've spoken with both you and him. I see things neither of you do and so I ask you again from a professional stand point. I am telling you simply do not involve him in any therapy, don't ask him any questions. Do not involve him in your personal life with Edward. Stick with a brother in law friendly relationship. It is the only safe way to maintain your relationship. There must be boundaries and you must set them and keep them strict."

"I can keep them. I just don't understand why you seem so upset about it. I don't feel that way wasn't that the point of the dinner?" I asked curious.

"The future changes many things Bella. Things grow in time don't let it do you understand? If you don't nurture it then it can't grow."

I suddenly understood the more communication I had with Jasper the closer we would become. The more chance it gave us of become emotionally attached and crossing a line we shouldn't. I didn't think we would but he was right that was what I say now. Who knows what could happen in the future. I didn't want to ever take that chance. I love Edward.

"I understand. I can do that." I said nodding. "I will set boundaries."

He smiled. "Good. Keep in mind they won't always be so easy to keep in place just don't let him tempt you into letting them down. You do it once then it's over."

I nodded.

"Good girl. If you have trouble with him call me, I'll snap his butt into shape."

I giggled at the thought and heard dada behind me and turned. Edward was standing with Gabriel on his hip. They are such a handsome pair. If I was a single woman walking through the store and I saw them I would be awestruck. I grinned.

"There are my two favorite men." I walked forward and kissed Gabe then Edward not expecting him to hold my head in place for a deeper kiss. I heard Alec chuckle behind me.

I pulled away and Edward winked. I smiled turning to Alec.

"So I guess this is goodbye."

"Yes, for now. Call me and keep in touch I want to know how everything goes." He smiled walking over to shake Edward's hand.

I nodded and ran up the stairs to pack but Edward had already done that for me. Seems he knew we were leaving today. He and Alec must have talked. I was so excited just to finally get out of here with my family. I had been glad to be here and feel better but I felt like a caged lion. The flight and drive to Forks wasn't too bad. Gabe seemed to be entertained looking out the window. He hadn't been out in a while either. I didn't get the same chills this time when we got closer.

Edward took my hand.

"Do you need Jasper here?" He asked quietly.

I knew how much it must hurt to ask me that. I met his eyes.

"I've decided to keep Jasper and me strictly a relative relationship. No therapy stuff, it's probably for the best. It seems when therapy gets involved too many emotions get involved and I don't want any confusion on anyone's part. I love you Edward and I'd give up anything for you. I know he loves Alice so why tempt fate?"

He looked shocked for a minute as then pulled me on his lap kissing me hard. I gasped glad the divider was up so the driver couldn't see us.

"Edward?" I moaned as his lips fell to my neck. I could feel he was overwhelmed with emotion, I knew he couldn't believe that I given up my relationship with Jasper for him. I don't know why. I was in love with him. I looked at Gabe who had drifted off thankfully as Edward hands slipped up my shirt.

"Edward what are you doing?" I whispered.

He met my eyes.

"I'm showing you how much you mean to me." He said huskily.

I looked around and raised an eyebrow.

"Ok, but in a limo on the way to Forks? I thought you wanted to…" I lost that train of thought when he tossed my shirt aside and his mouth fell to my chest. He doesn't fight fair at all.

"Edward….wait you said we were waiting and this isn't waiting…." I reminded him.

He moaned grabbing my face and kissing me hard.

"Bella, do you always talk so much?" He questioned not giving me time to answer. Needless to say that was all I said well…at least understandable words anyway besides his name for the next hour. I was mad at him and here he said he wanted to wait and he practically molested me in the limo!

We arrived at the house and I slid out shooting him and angry look. He smirked kissing me and grabbing Gabriel's seat. He walked up grabbing the keys from the envelope and opening the door. The driver set our bags inside and Edward turned smoothly handing him some money as if nothing happened. I waited until the door was shut and pushed his chest.

"You said we'd wait!"

"I did wait." He argued.

"Yeah until we were in the limo. Edward really." I huffed as I unbuckled Gabe. He chuckled behind me.

"Are you made because you enjoyed it or because you didn't think of it first?" He grinned lazily. Oh I swear that man! It was even worse that he looked so darn sexy doing it. I sat Gabe on the floor and passed him but he grabbed my waist pulling me close.

"I'm sorry love. I just needed to be close to you." He whispered against my ear lobe.

"Hugging is close." I spat.

He ran his nose up my earlobe.

"Not close enough." His voice was husky and it sent shivers down my spine. I closed my eyes and tried to focus. He truly was a mastermind at making me be naughty when I didn't want to.

"Ok well you could have pulled me in your lap." I managed. "That's closer." There I had a valid point.

He inhaled my hair deeply and bit my earlobe.

"I did pull you in my lap love and it was oh so close…mmmm." He purred. I gasped the little pervert. He was such a little pervert and I hated him for it cause damn him if I didn't like it. He was teasing me and having fun with it and he just made my point invalid.

"You were so warm Bella, so hot and I couldn't help myself. I had to feel you." He whispered.

Ok enough with the sex talk. I pulled away trying to calm my rapid heart and irregular breathing. I looked at Gabriel who was on the floor smiling at me. Too cute he's such a doll. I focused on him and walked back into the living room.

I heard Edward chuckle and I didn't even look at him. Naughty old…..I couldn't even think of a word for him right now. He sat beside me and sighed.

"So, I was thinking we could go out for dinner." He suggested.

I looked at him and smirked. I just love how he just changes subjects out of thin air.

"Got an appetite do we?" I could be sarcastic too you know.

He leaned on his knees.

"Not really, I was kind of thinking more along the lines of I would need it for later tonight." The flash in his eyes told me I was in trouble. I looked down and shook my head. I don't know what has gotten into him but whatever it is please don't stop anytime soon. Gabriel was holding onto my fingers and bouncing up and down and I chuckled at him.

"You are too precious my sweet boy." He laughed and continued to make funny noises as he bounced.

"We need to get diapers too love." Edward mentioned as he stood stretching. I watched him pass and looked back down at our son who was having a blast.

"Ok, there is a store in town. We should probably get him some cereal and baby food." I mentioned.

He shook his head taking out things to the room.

I didn't realize he was back until I looked up seeing him leaning on the wall watching us with a grin on his face. He met my eyes and looked down.

"We should probably head out."

"Ok." I agreed. "Let me change his diaper."

It wasn't long before we were at the grocery store. I picked out what I needed as we talked and joked happily.

"Hey, I'm going to get some chips." He said kissing my head and running off.

I looked at the little toys as Gabe reached for them and decided on one handing him a little giraffe. He immediately put it in his mouth as usual. I looked up and stood in shock as my mother stood before me. Her eyes big as she took a minute to register that it really was me after all of these years. I couldn't speak I just stood there staring. I didn't know what to say.

Edward walked back tossing the chips and a coke in the buggy.

"Ok love. Anything else you can think of? I grabbed a coke too." He asked kissing my head.

He noticed I wasn't moving and he looked at me oddly.

"Bella is everything allright?" He questioned and I felt his hand on my back.

"Bella is it really you?" My mother asked moving her basket closer, her face hopeful. Edward turned and looked at us both for a moment before realizing who she was. I felt him pull me closer to him and whisper.

"It's going to be fine love. It's why we're here remember?"

I bit my lip and nodded trying to find my voice.

"It's really me mom." It was a whisper but it was there.

She moved away from her basket to come over to me. I could tell she was afraid to touch me as the tears rolled down her face.

"Oh Bella I…when you left and you never called, I knew we had lost you and I wanted to go to you but Charlie said let you live your life. He didn't understand a mother's love. It's not so easily forgotten and I prayed every day you would one day return so we could talk. It hasn't been the same since you left. Charlie fell apart and I…I couldn't forgive myself for trying to act like it didn't matter when it did." She cried softly.

I felt Edward squeeze me and I looked down at Gabriel.

"It's why I'm here, to try and figure things out. I want to talk." I said looking back at her. She looked at Gabriel then to Edward. I knew what she was wondering, who was the baby.

"Is this your son?"

"Yes." I answered her. I wasn't going to lie to her.

Her hands covered her mouth and she cried harder. I hated to see her cry even after all of this time it broke my heart. I was barely holding myself together as it was. There were so many emotions going through me I can't even begin to describe them all.

"He's beautiful. What's his name?" She asked. I looked away to fight the tears that ripped at my heart and Edward stepped in for me.

"It's Gabriel, but we call him Gabe."

"It's a beautiful name." She said smiling. Edward lifted him from the seat.

"Would you like to hold him?" He asked her and I saw her eyes light up.

"I…If it's ok with Bella."

I nodded with a small smile and she took him. She looked so happy holding him. Edward slipped his arm back around me and pulled me close. I don't know what it was about him but he just knew what to do and say. I wouldn't have thought to do that but it was perfect. She talked to Gabriel gently and he smiled at her.

"Bella, would you come over tomorrow for lunch?" Renee questioned. I inhaled deeply and nodded. It was why I was here after all to get some questions answered and hopefully end this chapter of pain in my life. I didn't know what would happen after this I guess we would see.

She handed the baby back to Edward and smiled.

"Ok is noon alright? I can have a nice meal cooked and we can talk. You can bring your family and I'll ask Charlie to stay home."

I closed my eyes for a moment gathering strength.

"I think that's a great idea." I said after a moment.

She smiled.

"Good. So then, I'll see you tomorrow." She disappeared around to the next isle and I let out a breath I didn't realize I had been holding. Edward pulled me into his arms.

"You did wonderful sweetheart. Impressive and you will be wonderful tomorrow." He encouraged me.

I looked up at him.

"How do you know? I certainly don't."

He laughed.

"Bella….relax. Let's get out of here I'm starving."

We checked out and found small local place to eat. He patted my knee as I toyed with my food.

Bella, relax."

I smiled at him and took a bite of my hamburger. I was trying to relax. I just had so many things running through my mind. I couldn't help but wonder what tomorrow would bring. I know it doesn't help to dwell on it and I certainly wasn't trying to but what else could I do at this point? It had been so long and I had no answers. Not because they wouldn't give them, but because I wouldn't allow them to.

I hardly slept that night and I was up early drinking some coffee and looking out the window. I felt his warm arms around my waist.

"You were very restless last night." He said against my ear.

"I know… I'm sorry." I looked down. "I just couldn't sleep." I said in almost a whisper.

He rocked me gently.

"I love you Bella, more than you know. I'll be with you today and if anything doesn't feel right then we will leave. It's that simple." He forced me around in his arms.

"Look at me." He insisted. I looked up into his green eyes.

"You've been hurt enough. I won't let it happen anymore so if you want to leave at anytime today you just say so and we're gone."

I looked at his beautiful face and knew he was serious.

"You would do that?" I questioned.

He smiled gripping my face in his hands gently.

"I would do anything for you. Haven't you figured that out yet?" I inhaled softly and smiled as his lips descended onto mine. I relaxed into his arms and he pulled me close. I felt so safe. I knew we were just getting our trust back but it felt good to know he was with me on this. He is my life now.

When we arrived in their drive way I could feel my hands shaking and he rested his on mine.

"Bella, it's ok. I'm right here always." I met his eyes and bit my lip slipping out of the car. It wasn't long before he and Gabe were beside me. He took my hand and kissed my cheek.

"You ready?" I inhaled sharply.

"As ready as I will ever be I guess." I said beginning to walk towards my old house. It hadn't really changed a lot. I looked around remembering so many things about it. I shook my head to clear it and knocked on the door. My father opened it.

"Bell?"

I had not been called that in forever at least not in this way by him. I stood in shock. A huge grin came over his face and he opened the screen door and pulled me into his arms hugging me tightly.

"I missed you so much Bella. God how I missed my baby girl!" He said again and I heard his voice break, was he crying? I looked back and he was. My father was crying, he never cried….I didn't know what to say. He looked behind me and I turned.

"Oh, dad this is Edward and this is Gabriel."

He shook Edward's hand and looked stunned at Gabriel.

"He is your son?"

I nodded and he grinned, "I'm a grandpa? I mean Renee told me but to see him in the flesh…" He shook his head a new set of tears forming.

"He's beautiful Bell, you did good, you did so good." He moved to Gabriel touching him gently and Edward offered him to my father. He looked at me expectantly and I smiled.

"He's your grandson."

He took him from Edward and I can't deny the joy on his face or the warm feeling in my heart. As much as I had tried to burry my past it felt so good to see them again and have this moment with them. Edward moved to me and kissed my head whispering in my ear.

"You are one of the strongest people I know and I am proud of you."

I looked up through my tears and he kissed me gently. I couldn't help but smile, how did I ever find this man? He is like no one I have ever known. I would be an absolute fool to let him go. I better get my butt ship shape because he is worth anything I have to go through to keep him.

I heard my mother as she walked out of the kitchen.

"I thought I heard voices!" She hugged me then Edward.

"It's good to see you again."

He smiled as she then turned to see Charlie with the baby. She chuckled.

"Bella he used to do the same thing with you when you were little. I could never get him to put you down. I think it is why you and he were so close." She said and after a moment her smile faded and she cleared her throat and turned her attention to me.

"Are you hungry? I made roast."

I smiled.

"I am. I love your roast." I said returning her smile. It felt odd to be here yes, but it also felt like home at the same time. I was nervous but happy. I don't know to explain all of the emotions I felt at this point there were just too many.

I followed her to the kitchen and helped her finish setting up like old times. I tired to ignore the negative things that had happened and focus on the good. We ate and visited and it was actually nice. It was then it got awkward. I helped my mother clean the table and we went to the living room. Gabe sat on the floor playing and I bit the inside of my cheek feeling Edward reassuringly take my hand.

My dad looked up at me sadly.

"I know you didn't come here out of the blue Bella. What brings you by?"

I swallowed hard and inhaled. I could swear the air burned my throat. I kept reminding myself I was strong and I could do this. I knew why I was here and I knew he would ask too.

"I want to know what happened. I mean why you pushed Jake away? You loved him to death and then when I got pregnant all of a sudden you didn't want him around. Why?" I asked watching their faces.

My mother looked distressed and my father he sighed.

"Bella, we always liked Jacob. He was like my own son you know that. Billy was like my brother and it hurt to see you hurting when we pushed him away. It hurt for you to hate us and think it was all our idea."

"What are you saying?" I said confused.

My mother met my eyes her own full of tears.

"Billy didn't want Jake to leave the reservation and he knew you wanted to go to college. He also knew you wouldn't stay and Jake would follow you. He pretended he was behind you when actually he wasn't. He was the one who insisted you be separated. He left us looking like the bad guys, as much as it killed us your father had no choice Billy was his best friend and he begged him to do this."

I gasped in shock.

"How could you…" I stood shaking my head and then looking back at them.

"I loved him and I hated you for years….and it was never you!" I said loudly but not quite yelling.

My mother stood moving closer to me.

"Bella, your father has always felt guilty for the car wreck and Billy being in the wheelchair. He always felt like it should have been him. When Billy asked how could he refuse? We know it was wrong but how could we know what the end result would be? We never knew you would try and sneak off…had we known….Bella we just didn't know better."

I felt the tears falling and I could see my mother was crying also. I turned to my father who had his head in his hands. I moved to kneel beside him.

"Is this true dad?"

He moved his hands and I saw in his eyes it was. He hurt, the pain, the confusion. He looked at me in sorrow.

"Billy was beside himself when Jake got killed. We never expected anything like that Bella. We just wanted you two to have a happy future. He hoped you would move on and I tried to tell him you wouldn't. I knew the look in your eyes when you looked at Jake. I knew you would never just move on."

I felt as if my heart was going to drop to the floor. All of this new information and this pain I knew it would be painful but I had not expected any of this. I sat on the floor shaking my head. I felt Edward move behind me, his strong arms enveloping me and rocking me gently to make sure I knew he was there and I was loved.

I rested my face on his bicep a moment then looked back at my parents.

"The baby…my daughter."

My mother shook her head.

"I am so sorry Bella the hospital did everything they could. We said it was for the best because we didn't know what else to say. I came home and cried for days. We were trying to be strong for you, but we were actually looking forward to her birth as much as you were."

I felt the warm tears and closed my eyes leaning back on Edward. I felt his warm lips on my head.

"Do you need some fresh air?" He whispered into my ear. I shook my head no as he held me close. I just sat in the quiet of the moment enjoying the time in his arms. I felt Gabe on my legs and looked down to see his beautiful smile. He was such a joy. He had no idea about stress or problems. What I wouldn't give to remember what that was like.

I stroked his cheek and smiled at him.

"You are my angel." I whispered lifting him onto my lap. He laughed happily and continued to play with the block her was holding.

My father smiled.

"Bella tell us about your life and what we missed?"

I laughed.

"Oh well, it's been a mess to say the least. I made it through law school and I married a man named Hayden. I then took on a partner at the firm named Edward, whom I fell in love with." I winked at him.

They looked at each other then back at me curiously.

"Hayden wasn't the family man you see. I divorced Hayden and found Edward was someone I couldn't live without and well…little Gabe came along. We're planning on getting married in the future we just haven't set a date yet." I turned to Edward. "Is that close enough?"

"Cliff notes version, I'd say close enough." He answered with a smirk.

My parent's looked stunned and then my mom smiled.

"Well it's good enough for me I can tell by the way you look at each other there is something special between you two."

I shrugged winking at him.

"He has a little something special to him."

I stood handing Gabe to Edward.

"I'm going to go look at my old room." I said softly. He nodded gave me a look that I knew meant if you need me I'm here. I turned and my mom smiled.

"Go ahead, it's just like you left it."

I walked up the stairs feeling my heart pound faster as I finally made it to the door. I opened it and gripped the door for support. It was exactly the same as I left it. I walked in looking around my stuffed animals still sat on the bed, the bear that Jake had won me at the carnival in the middle. I looked at the pictures on my wall there were some of me, me and my family at different functions, and several of me and Jake.

I ran my fingers across the glass and turned looking around. I felt like I was being watched and turned to see my father.

"Your mom insisted we keep it the same just in case you ever came back." He said softly.

I smiled sadly and sat on the bed picking up the teddy bear and toying with it. He sat beside me and I could feel he was nervous. So was I when you consider I have not seen him in years. He looked around my small room.

"I hoped one day you would come back. I didn't want to be pushy and write to you. I knew until you were ready it would be falling on deaf ears." His voice sounded so unsure.

"Why didn't you tell me the truth?" I asked.

He sighed.

"Ah Bell, you were so young. I just couldn't. I know now it was wrong you always were older than you should be. You always could take more than most people, but I had given Billy my word and he kept reminding me of that."

"What about what you owed me? I was your daughter." I said harshly.

He shook his head, "I know."

I set the bear down and picked up a picture of Jake and me from my bedside.

"It doesn't….It doesn't matter now. It won't bring Jake back. It won't bring my daughter back. It won't change anything will it? It's all just a bunch of words." I stood and looked out the window.

"I would do anything to go back and change things, but I can't." He said honestly. I could hear the pain in his words.

"Bella I never meant for ay of those things to happen. I never wanted to lose my daughter and that is exactly what happened. Billy lost Jacob and I lost you." He said his voice breaking and I realized there was truth in his words. He had lost me because I had shut him and mom out of my life for years.

I turned to face him.

"I look in your mother's eyes every day and see the pain I caused." He said sadly, knowingly.

"I took you away from her, I made this all happen and I live with it daily." He finally broke down. I felt myself break down with him. I had not realized the gravity of it all. I had no idea he blamed this all on himself. He was thinking everyday that this was his entire fault and blaming himself. So many things were not what I thought they were.

I sat beside him and pulled him into my arms. It felt good to hug my father again. I had not hugged him since I was sixteen. It was an oddly reassuring feeling. We cried together for I don't even want to guess how long. It seemed like forever. My eyes were puffy and swollen. He didn't fare much better.

He released me and smiled sadly.

"I miss ya Bell."

"I miss you too dad." I said wiping my face.

He nodded not pushing it further than that. I stood slipping the photo in my purse.

"I should check on my boys." I said then knowing Edward was probably worried. He stood and followed me down. I found them having a blast. Gabe was playing pony on Edward's leg. He loved that game. My mom turned.

"Everything ok?" Her face turned to concern when she saw we had been crying.

"It's fine just remembering." I said before dad got a chance to respond. Edward watched my face as I sat beside him. I smiled at him.

"Well I hate to be a party pooper but Gabe will need his nap soon."

"Can you come again?" My mother asked standing.

I froze and felt Edward's hand touch my knee.

"I think so. It's just going to take time, but I think I'll come again." I said softly.

She smiled in understanding and hugged me.

I stood followed by them and walked to the door. I hugged my father goodbye and was out the door and in the car quickly. I just needed air and to digest what had happened and been said. I was feeling ok until the end and then I just needed to get out of there. It seemed like emotions were overwhelming me.

Arriving at the house Edward led me in and unbuckled Gabe who was asleep. He lifted my chin looking at me with concern in his eyes.

"I'm going to put him down, will you be ok?"

I nodded not trusting myself to speak. He kissed my head and took the baby heading to where his crib was setup.

I held it together until he left then took the picture out of my purse. We were happy in that picture, we had just found out I was pregnant. Jacob was on the swing and I was in his lap and we were smiling like the crazy teenagers we were having no idea what was ahead for us. I dropped to my knees the tears overflowing me like never before. It felt like everything had come together and collapsed on me at once. Is this what Alec had been waiting for?

God help me.

We're getting to the good stuff no worries she had to go through healing and all of that. It can't happen overnight you know. She did have a serious situation in her childhood. As far as Edward don't think he's forgiven Jasper just because he's so calm. He hasn't even seen him yet. He's just let it go temporarily. Lot's more to come :)