Anime Character Humiliation Match ep 38

By Sailor Aries

Disclaimer: We do not own Slayers or Dragonball Z, however much we may like to. Xeria is a creation of Kelly/Arcanum, and Babbit is a creation of Sailor Aries, respectfully.

"What is that?" Babbit asked in a flat voice as Xeria opened a bubble envelope. Mysteriously, although there seemed to be no other living being in this universe, Xeria had received a package in the mail this morning. Babbit hadn't even known they had a mailbox.

"Sore wa himitsu desu!" Xeria chimed happily, pulling the object out of the envelope and proceeding to unwind the tissue paper from around it. Babbit rolled her eyes and turned away sullenly, although she was still curious as to what it was.

Xeria made a noise that sounded something like a squeal of happiness, so Babbit turned back curiously. Xeria was holding a game cartridge and waving it around happily.

Babbit said nothing, knowing full well that if she asked what it was, she would simply receive the same answer as before. So, she waited patiently as Xeria turned on the TV and inserted the cartridge into the Super Nintendo system.

"...Is... that...?" Babbit asked slowly as the game appeared on the screen. "...a Slayers game?"

Xeria didn't say anything; she simply ignored Babbit's question, selecting 'new game' from the menu.

"I didn't know they made one." Babbit said observantly.

"Probably because it never made it to the U.S." Xeria said thoughtfully.

"True; it is all in Japanese." Babbit commented. She watched as Xeria played for a bit, then became somewhat bored with it, since all the text was in a language Babbit was not entirely fluent in.Japanese

"So are we having a match today or what?" She asked, rolling her eyes upward.

"I dunno." Arcanum's voice replied. "Ask Aries-san."

"Aries-san?" Babbit repeated, again rolling her eyes.

There was no response.

"Aries-san." Babbit repeated.

Again, no response.

Babbit waited.

"...sorry about that!" Aries' voice replied, sounded a little breathless.

"What took so long?" Babbit asked.

"I was in the middle of a game!" Aries replied happily.

"Whatever, let's get this game rolling." Babbit said irritably.

At that, there was the usual blinding flash of light as the stands filled with people. It was quite easy to identify the Slayers and Dragonball Z cast, one on each side of the ring.

"How many more contestant combinations can you make from these two universes?" Babbit demanded, sounding aggravated.

"Well, you know, there are TONS of people who haven't fought here yet. Like Valgarv-san, for example." Xeria said cheerfully, waving to her Father in the stands. (Xelloss waved back, incidentally.)

Babbit glared darkly at Xeria, picking up her interview card as the contestants entered the ring.

From the Dragonball Z universe, Trunks from the Future entered.

"That outfit is much cooler than the GT Trunks'." Xeria observed, glancing from the Trunks in the ring to the Trunks in the stands.

From the Slayers universe, Gourry entered the ring. Upon entering, he turned back to the crowd and waved.

"You'd better win some prize money, Jellyfish brains!" Lina yelled from the stands.

"Ah, Aunt Lina has become a housewife, it appears." Xeria chuckled to herself, appearing beside Gourry.

"Ah, Xeria-chan" Gourry said with a smile. "It's nice to see you."

"And you, Uncle Gourry." Xeria said with a smile that looked undoubtedly sarcastic. "So, you're entering this match several years after your series has ended. Do you think that will affect your fighting ability?"

"Well, it depends on what kind of opponent I'm fighting." Gourry said with unusual thoughtfulness. "I may not be as fast as I used to be, but I think I've got a LOT more endurance than before."

"Aunt Lina will do that to you." Xeria said with a smile.

"Yeah" Gourry agreed, earning him a fireball from the stands. Xeria, naturally, dodged.

"By the way, you'll need this." Xeria said, tossing a familiar-looking artifact to Gourry.

"The Sword of Light!" He exclaimed happily, picking up his long-lost sword. "Thanks, Xeria-chan!"

Xeria shrugged and returned to the announcer's table.

Babbit approached Trunks. "So, Trunks Briefs." She paused, and almost snickered. "Is that your real name?"

"Uh... Yeah..." Trunks answered in an uncertain tone. "It always was before."

"Anyway, this says that you are rumored to be the only 'pretty' male in the Dragonball Z universe. How do you feel about that?"

"Well, that means I have a lot of fangirls..." He said, almost blushing while glancing away.

"I see." Babbit said, and left the arena. She returned to the announcer's table, where Xeria was sitting and waiting will the bell.

"Fight begin!" Xeria chimed, ringing the bell.

As Gourry reached for his sword, Trunks draw his faster than the eye could see, and zipped around behind Gourry, swinging downward. Gourry quickly drew his sword and blocked, pushing Trunks back. Trunks flipped through the air and landed on his feet, halfway across the ring from then examined his blade, which seemed to be crumbling from the force of Trunks' blow. Gourry allowed the blade to crumble off, then with an odd motion that could not quite be seen, caused the crumbled remains of the blade to separate from the hilt.

"Looks like you're out of weaponry." Trunks said in an almost smug manner.

"Takes after his father" Babbit observed, glancing up in the stands to Vegeta.

"Don't be so sure of that." Gourry said, returning the smug smirk. "Light, come forth!"

As these words escaped Gourry's mouth, the magical blade of the sword of light appeared, reminded Babbit vaguely of a light saber somehow.

Trunks and Gourry stood on opposite sides of the arena for a long moment, as the camera dramatically whipped around them and dramatic background music blared in the background.

"Turn it off already." Babbit said darkly at Xeria, who was standing by the stereo system. Xeria stuck her tongue out at Babbit in a clear "no way!" manner.

A vague rumbling noise began to emerge and seemed to grow closer.

"I have the feeling that isn't part of the background music?" Babbit asked in confusion, glancing at Xeria.

"I think not." Xeria said, turning her glance away from the ring.

Babbit followed Xeria's glance to the entrance of the arena, where a crowd of fangirls was quickly approaching.

It was quite a large herd of fangirls; many of them carried signs that said things like "I LOVE YOU, TRUNKS!", "YOU'RE MY HERO!", and some that simply said "TRUNKS", surrounded by big pink hearts.

(of course, there were also a good deal of signs that had rather risqué messages on them, most of which dealt with the "undergarment" nature of Trunks' name; however, for simplicity, none shall appear in this text.)

"I thought fangirls weren't allowed in this realm!" Babbit exclaimed in panic.

"I guess they broke in?" Xeria said musingly as the fangirls swarmed in, and continued to pour in through the entrance. The sheer number of them was almost awe-inspiring. They swept through the whole stadium, filling it. All those who had the capacity to fly ascended into the air to avoid being swept away by the fangirls.

However, Gourry could not fly, and so when the torrent of screaming, crazed females swept over him, he was knocked off his feet and carried out of the ring. The girls swarmed under Trunks, who was flying in the air. They chanted his name, their cries becoming more bloodthirsty by the moment.

"Winner, Trunks!" Xeria diagnosed.

"...are you so sure about that...?" Babbit asked, watching in amusement as the fangirls continued to shriek, climbing over each other in at attempt to reach their beloved Trunks. Trunks, of course, was in a state of sheer panic, which reflected on his face.

Xeria almost chuckled, and replied "Certainly."

The end