Dark Waltz- Chapter 36

A/N: Here's the next chapter... I hope you enjoy it!

BPOV

I hated this new hearing. I didn't think any one else on earth knew just how much I hated this way of listening.

Muffled, distorted, echoing hearing that no one else had ever heard in their lives. It reminded me entirely of the way I heard things after being picked in the institute, after the Doctor had injected me with a new chemical.

"Boo?"

"Bell?"

The voices were calling me, but I was much too tired to respond. I was shocked at how well I'd reacted with Carlisle before, but thanks to my strenuous pen exercises, I was completely worn out.

"I thought you said she was awake," complained Emmett, his voice not far from me at all.

"Give her time, Emmett," scolded Carlisle. "She's exhausted."

The room fell silent, and I fought off sleep once again. I wanted to talk to my brother.

I didn't want him to worry, as Carlisle said everyone had done.

"Was she lucid?" demanded Alice's high voice, sounding quite insistent.

"Very," said Carlisle easily. "She was writing questions for me to answer."

"Come on, Boo," mumbled Emmett, his large hand engulfing my own as he held onto it gently.

Just like I had with Carlisle's hand, I squeezed back.

"She moved!" cried Emmett, the sudden volume making me cringe away in my mind.

He was very loud.

"Quiet," said Carlisle softly. "She's awake, I told you that. She's just sleeping now."

"Boo?"

Gently, much to his pleasure, I forced my fingers to curl around his, gripping as tightly as I could.

"Are you awake?"

Squeeze.

"Good," he said eagerly, just as I felt a weight on my pillow and gentle breathing in my ear.

He was sharing pillows with me, and I sort of liked that idea… it felt like I'd been sleeping forever, and I'd missed my brother.

"Are you really awake?" he prompted quietly.

I forced my eyes to crack open, slamming them shut again at the sight of the bright fluorescent lights in this nasty hospital.

I hated this place, but had no energy to protest. If Carlisle said it was safe, I believed him.

No matter what my heart tried to tell me.

"Hey there," said Emmett happily, watching as I cautiously peered from between my lashes, letting my eyes adjust to the light. "How's it going?"

I grunted.

"Don't speak," Carlisle reminded me. "Grab her that paper."

Alice appeared before me, smiling and teary as she placed the pen in my weakened hand.

I drew a smiley for Emmett, answering his question and earning me a laugh.

"Good to hear it," he said softly. "I've missed you."

I looked over at him, careful not to disturb the thing in my throat, watching him intently.

I want to go home.

He laughed indulgently.

"Take it one step at a time, Boo," he murmured. "You've still got some healing to do first."

I frowned and looked up at Alice, who was watching me with dazed eyes.

Where's Esme?

"Gone to the cafeteria with Jasper, Rosalie and Edward," said Alice gently. "She'll be glad to see you awake."

I looked down to my blankets anxiously, suddenly very worried about what Esme would think of me now that I'd caused so much trouble.

Esme hated trouble.

"Do you want me to call her?" asked Carlisle carefully, assessing my mood as best he could.

I shrugged, trying my best to ignore the tugging pain in my front.

Is she upset?

"She won't be now that you're awake and talking," said Carlisle easily. "She'll be very pleased."

Oh.

"She and the others were all in here earlier, while you were still asleep. It's eleven in the morning on the fourteenth. You slept right through the night last night," he said. "Rosalie was particularly miffed that she missed you."

Rosalie? Emmett noticed my confusion and laughed gently.

"Rose has no patience," he said easily. "She's been waiting for you to wake up so she can visit, and when you slept all morning she got a little antsy."

So I'd made Rosalie unhappy too.

"Don't you even," scolded Emmett sternly, watching me with accusing eyes. "Don't you feel badly about sleeping. Rose can just deal with it."

I flushed bright red and he smiled brightly once more, his hand coming up to touch the reddened flesh.

"I've missed that too," he said quietly. "It's been a sad week."

"When is she going to breathe on her own?" asked Alice suddenly, appearing on the other side of me.

"Eleazar might try today," he said carefully. "There's no guarantees, though. It all depends on how well she does without the help. She was trying to breathe on her own last night while she was sleeping."

"That's good, right?" asked Emmett eagerly, looking positively full of questions.

"It is," confirmed Carlisle. "It shows that her unconscious drive to breathe is there. It all depends on whether or not she'll be able to keep breathing once the tube is out."

I blanched, not liking the sound of this one little bit.

If I could breathe on my own? And if not, what then?

Would I suffocate?

"If it doesn't go well, Eleazar will just reintubate her and try again another day. I think you'll do fine," he said gently, smiling down at me.

I just watched him, not very placated.

"…don't know when," came a voice from the doorway, making all four of us glance over. "A few weeks at least. School can wait, I don't give a-"

Jasper's tall blonde frame came strolling through the doorway, stopping dead when he saw me watching him. His face broke into a wide grin as he stepped forward, leaving Carlisle to step out.

Only three at a time, I guessed.

"Hey there," he said gently, coming closer to the foot of my bed. He rested his hand on my foot and I squirmed, feeling very ticklish under my covers.

"Sorry," he said chuckling as he moved his hand away. "Good to see you awake."

I nodded briefly, wondering if it was possible for my face to catch fire… it felt so hot.

"Esme and Rose are on their way up too," he warned, looking at my brother and sister. "I'm sure they'll want to kick you out to come in."

Emmett laughed and shook his head, not daring to argue with either of them.

"Edward's outside," he informed me, watching me closely as I took in that bit of information.

…Edward.

I could have sworn I'd heard him crying more than once while I drifted in and out of sleep… no one else had been around but him, and he'd been very upset.

Him being sad had made me sad…

…and I wanted to see him.

"Alice?" asked Jasper gently, seeing me glance towards the door. "Do you want to come and grab a drink?"

"Not now-" she began, looking incredibly irritated as she watched her boyfriend. "Oh."

Alice suddenly looked very pleased and very secretive, earning her a small, slightly alarmed frown from me.

"Yeah sure," she said airily, glancing at Emmett. "You be nice to him."

Emmett said nothing, remaining stoically silent as Alice and Jasper joined hands.

"I'll be back soon Bell," she said gently, pulling away from Jasper to kiss my cheek. "Don't forget to make him use the sanitizer."

And with those strange instructions, Alice waved gently and left the room with Jasper, leaving the door ajar for the next visitor to come in.

When his bronze head poked around the corner, I felt my cheeks heat up as I tried my best to look somewhat presentable.

The breathing tube was making that very difficult.

"Hi," he said, taking a tentative step inside the room. I watched as he looked around, glancing over me and letting his eyes rest on Emmett, who looked silently haughty.

I waved back, encouraging him as best I could to come in.

"Are you feeling alright?" he asked, earning him a prompt nod.

I wouldn't tell him that I was groggy and drugged and that my front was sore.

I didn't want to upset him again.

"That's good," he said, sitting carefully on the chair. "I was in earlier."

My pen found my hand again and I wrote quickly.

I know.

"Right," he said, frowning carefully as he fell silent.

The clock ticked as Emmett observed pointedly, not even bothering to give Edward and I any semblance of privacy.

"I'm glad you're awake now," he said gently, taking my needled hand in his. His hand was very warm and very gentle as he held mine, warming up the chilly extremity.

He grinned crookedly, the sight of it making me almost giddy.

I loved that crooked smile of his, and based on what I'd heard while I was half asleep, he needed to smile a bit more.

"Do you know how to play crazy eights?" he asked suddenly, reaching into his pocket to pull out a worn pack of cards.

No.

"I'll teach you," he said eagerly. "It's fun."

"I don't think she's ready to play games yet," said Emmett tartly, watching Edward warily.

I want to. I'm bored, I wrote back, glaring angrily at my brother. You can show me, if you want.

Edward smiled triumphantly and dealt the cards to the two of us, leaving Emmett out so he could pout about it.

Emmett really didn't like it when Edward and I were together… I wondered why that was.

"Emmett, get out for a bit so Esme and I can come in," said a familiar voice, trailing in suddenly from the doorway. Emmett, Edward and I all glanced around to see Rosalie's tall frame standing in the doorway, looking positively rife with impatience.

"Hurry up," said Emmett grudgingly, his gaze softening as he looked at me. "I'll let everyone else have their turn with you before I come back, okay? If you need anything, just send your lapdog out to get me."

My lapdog?

"Shut up, Emmett," scowled Edward.

Edward the lapdog?

"Come on, come on, come on," said Rosalie quickly.

Emmett cracked a reluctant grin as he kissed my cheek and left the room, letting Rosalie and her mother trail in together.

"God, I'm glad you're up," she said happily.

I nodded briefly, turning my eyes from Rosalie to Esme, who was standing against the wall, observing the three of us.

Edward paused our game for a moment to let Esme and Rosalie have their time. He slid his chair back towards the wall, taking the table with him as he kept his gaze glued to me.

I hoped we weren't finished already. I was very bored here in this room and I rather liked that game he was teaching me.

…then, Edward winked at me.

He winked and I blushed beet red.

"Oh sweetheart," said Esme suddenly, rushing forward to embrace me gently. I expected her to hurt me, to brush up against my incision, but she kept herself far away from the cut and didn't even make me flinch.

I could only return the hug with one hand, since the other had a tube coming from it, but she seemed overwhelmed by that small action. I watched as she looked me over, tears threatening to fall as she tried to compose herself.

"I'm so very glad you're awake and alert," she said. "We've been incredibly worried for you."

I blushed and looked away, determined not to let Esme make me cry. I didn't want to make her even more upset… Esme didn't deserve to be sad.

"You'll be home in no time," said Esme gently. "Once Eleazar thinks you're well enough to be at home, he'll discharge you and you'll be able to come back to Forks…"

Esme spoke for a long moment about when she thought I'd be able to go home and what she planned to do once I was there. She planned to use the guest room on the main floor for me while I recovered and she planned on making sure I was always comfortable.

She wanted me to be happy, she said, and now that my heart was on the mend, she thought that's what I should focus on.

Being happy.

"Are you comfortable?" she asked suddenly, looking me over once more. "Do you need anything?"

No thank you.

"Are you absolutely sure, sweetheart? I don't want you to sit quietly while you're uncomfortable. Whatever it is, I can definitely try and get it for you-"

I'm fine, I wrote back, slightly alarmed by her insistence.

"If you're sure," she said gently, brushing the hair away from my face gently.

I nodded quickly, not liking the feeling the tube made when I did.

"I love you," she said gently.

Love you too, I wrote back, my cheeks red.

She beamed at me and kissed my forehead, stepping back to observe from the chair Emmett had left beside my bed.

"Are you sure you're alright?" asked Rose suddenly, sounding both uneasy and worried.

I nodded gently, trying my best to convey my comfort. I wasn't very uncomfortable, even if I wanted to get out of here.

I wanted to be home with my bed and my books and my house and my puppy.

I missed Jake more than anyone in this room could ever know. Now that I no longer missed my brother, sister and Edward, I could only miss my Jakey.

Poor puppy was probably worried sick… he always worried when I left him and he didn't know where I went. He had grown so used to being able to barge in on me whenever he wanted to get himself a pat on the head, I found myself wondering how he was using his time away from the family.

I hoped Marcus was taking good care of my baby.

… I was getting tired again, and I didn't like it. Gently, with my foot, I hooked one toe around the rolling table and pulled it closer, earning me a grin from Edward as we returned to our game.

I needed to stay awake for more than ten minutes at a time if I wanted to get better. Sleeping all the time only made me lazy.

"Are you sure?" he asked, picking up his cards again.

I nodded, determined to finish this new game he'd taught me… I was determined to win this new game he'd taught me.

"Crazy eights?" asked Rosalie amusedly, glancing at Esme. Esme watched the two of us with gentle eyes as Edward and I played our cards, both of us entranced.

I couldn't stop looking at him… it had been far too long since I'd seen him.

"Isabella?" asked a new voice, one from the doorway. I glanced over, irked by the distraction as a new nurse- not Marla- came in, smiling.

"I'm Amelia," she said gently. "I took over for Marla at seven this morning. Doctor Denali's coming in to see you in a moment," she warned. "I think he wants to try extubating you."

I stared at her, rather alarmed.

"It won't be too bad," she soothed. "You'll do just fine."

If I could have surgery to replace my heart, surely I could survive one measly tube removal?

"We've been weaning you off the ventilation since the sedation was removed, and last night you were trying to breathe on your own," she explained, repeating what Carlisle had already told me. "If it doesn't work out, you'll have a new tube put in place."

I nodded briefly, forcing down the sickening fear at the thought of the doctor pulling this tube out of me. Surely Doctor Dupont had done much worse?

"I'll have to ask you to leave," she said, directing her attention to Edward and Rosalie. "Mom can stay, but that's it."

"We'll be back, Bella," said Edward gently, sliding the table aside as he gave my hand a gentle squeeze. "Maybe you'll be able to talk when I get back."

I nodded, flushing red again as Rosalie offered me a gentle hug, trying her best not to disturb anything.

"You'll be fine," she said. "I'll go tell Emmett and the others what's going on."

I said a silent thank you to Rosalie, knowing that once this tube was out, I'd be able to say a real thank you.

Rosalie and Edward left the room together, neither one dawdling or procrastinating as I hoped they would. I didn't want to be left here with a doctor and his tube removal system, whatever that might be. I was very thankful for Esme, who took her place on the chair beside me while the nurse wheeled in a cart of equipment.

"Doctor Denali's just washing up," she said gently. "He'll be in any moment now."

I held Esme's hand tightly, not liking this idea one little bit.

I hated medicine and anything doctor's liked to do.

I absolutely hated it.

"Hello there, Bella," said Eleazar, walking in easily. He had gloves and a mask on this time as he stood next to the cart. Amelia the nurse and another person- a young man- came inside and watched as Eleazar opened a container on his cart.

"I'll need you to relax, alright?" he asked. "When I pull the tube out, I need you to cough."

Cough?

"If you have any issues at all with your breathing, your monitor will let us know and we'll get it under control before you know it."

He did this much too often if he was so cheery about it.

"This is Fredrick, my intern," he explained, "and you know Amelia. They're here to help."

I squeezed Esme's hand very hard, no longer as tired as I was before Eleazar had come into my room.

My new heart felt like it was going to leap right out of my chest.

I felt him removing the tape around my mouth before he instructed me to open my mouth. I did as I was told, and when he disconnected the machine part from the tube part, I felt myself breathing all by myself.

It wasn't that hard.

"Good," he said enthusiastically. "You're doing very well."

Yeah right.

When he began to tug on that tube, I thought I would throw up right then and there… it felt very strange and very uncomfortable as it came out, leaving me to choke and splutter behind it.

It hurt my incision to cough, but I did as I'd been instructed. Frederick the intern watched my machines carefully as Amelia handed Doctor Denali his supplies, helping him do whatever he needed done.

It was, I noted, a very long tube they'd had in my throat.

I didn't like looking at it, but found myself very pleased when it was gone.

"I'd keep off the talking for a while longer, since your throat might be a little sore," he said. "Tomorrow, we'll try you on some water and clear fluids to get you back up to a solid diet."

I wanted to eat, I decided, since my mouth tasted gross. I didn't like the taste of morning breath and plastic tubes.

With the tube gone, I was also able to stretch my neck, which was very stiff and sore.

"You did very well, sweetheart," said Esme gently, brushing my hair back once more. "Is your throat sore at all?"

"A little," I whispered gently, earning me a wide smile.

"We'll see what we can do about it," she said softly, keeping her hand on my hair. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," I said, relishing in the fact that I could speak without fear of pain. Only my neck bothered me now, from being so still and stiff for so long.

"Are you tired?" she asked gently, scooting her chair closer. "I can close the shades if you'd like to go back to sleep."

I hesitated, but Esme saw right through me.

"Go to sleep," she soothed gently, placing my foot back under my covers and tugging them up to my chest. "Rest and get better."

"'Kay," I said, letting her put the end of my bed into a more comfortable position for sleeping.

"Have a good sleep, sweetheart," she said gently, letting my eyes drift shut and my body relax.

Before Esme could say her next words, sleep took me and I was lost to the world.

A/N: I have the next chapter completed as well, so it should be out in a week. With summer already here and school done with (I graduated this past Thursday!) I have a lot more time on my hands to busy myself with writing.