[+]
Scene 38: An Xmas to Remember
or
"Oh! One True Love"
There were no trees to be spared in the Ruins, and certainly no evergreens. It was therefore necessary to be resourceful for Xmas. Toriel owned an artificial Xmas tree that Celine had conceived of and helped her build. She had taken it out to be decorated in those years when she had a child, but for the long spaces between, she normally left it stowed away. Sometimes the small monsters used it for their own purposes, however. At this point, they were indeed in that habit, and Toriel was loathe to reclaim her tree if it meant denying them something to decorate. "We have no child to entertain," she said. "We can keep Xmas in our hearts without need for a tree to look upon."
Alphys hadn't been ready to accept that, however. She had a laboratory to work with! She knew she could create a new artificial tree, so she set to work. Soon, though, she realized that the plans she'd come up with were too grand for their modest home, so she decided to give her giant tree to the monsters of New Home in exchange for Toriel's smaller one. And then she decided to turn her efforts toward making new and better fake foliage for the tree… and various other structural improvements.
Sans actually got into the holiday spirit and managed to churn out a prodigious number of painted ornaments, though no one ever saw him do any more than lazily stroke a paintbrush over them in between sentences. His paint was probably dry half the time, yet Sans' bin of ornaments kept getting fuller and fuller. Meanwhile, Toriel broke out her oldest, best recipes for Xmas cookies and started churning them out by the fourscore, delivering them to town with unstoppable determination, as if someone might be averse to her delivering sparkly sugar cookies to the populace.
The pile of gifts beneath the tree remained modest at first, mainly because the three residents decided that they would limit themselves to one gift each per person, lest that aspect of the holiday too get out of control. But Napstablook visited often enough to be worthy of gifts, and the spiders started leaving gifts on the doorstep, so gifts for them became warranted as well. Soon, the one thing that kept the growing collection from lofting the tree off the ground entirely was the fact that Alphys's largest gift was one she worked on in secret, the one she called Project X. She kept it at the back of the Home warehouse she used for her laboratory, behind a sliding wall marked "PROJECT X: DON'T COME IN!" She'd thought of calling it "TOTALLY NOT SECRET PROJECT" to deflect suspicion, but decided in the end that transparency about non-transparency was the best policy.
The X in the project's name stood for the unknown, of course. Mettaton had revealed on broadcast TV that Alphys had a crush on the unknown, which in a sense was true. And it also reflected the project's secret status. But the X really stood for something else entirely—Xmas. And what did the X in Xmas stand for? Traditionally, according to the garbage that washed down from the surface, it was said to stand for Xristos, or Christ, one of the most important figures in human history, who supposedly gave himself to humankind in order to erase their sins. And that sounded really nice to Alphys, who wouldn't mind one bit having her sins erased. But monsters didn't have a Christ. All they had were the likes of Asgore… and this year, for the first time, they didn't even have him anymore. So monsters liked to pretend that the X stood for other things—things that might matter to their own lives. Things like xanthum gum and xylophones, but especially xenia. Xenia was the concept of welcoming anyone into one's home who needed it, even a stranger. It was the idea that anyone deserved hospitality just for being themselves, not for any special reason. It was an ideal that monsters tried to practice during the Xmas season, and Alphys admired it. She'd never been brave enough to let a stranger sleep in her home. She was nervous even inviting friends over! But Toriel's home was full of xenia, and Alphys was proud to live there and be part of it. She told herself that Project X was carried out in the spirit of xenia, even if it was the reverse of what one might expect. Sure, she wanted to impress Toriel. But beyond that, Alphys wanted to be xenial, for once in her life.
When Xmas morning arrived at last, the family of three had a swift breakfast of sweet potato bread and reindeer moss before going out to walk the streets of Home. Whistles chirped and bells rang from various places so that there was never a dearth of sound. The small monsters hurried hither and thither, celebrating and being cordial to one another in their diverse ways. The Vegetoids were feeding their greens freely to anyone who passed by. The Migosps were shuffling sideways through the streets, noodling their arms in merry dance. The Froggits, in their language of croaks, expounded on matters of philosophy as they hopped lackadaisically about. And everyone was conspicuously refraining from picking on the Looxes.
Toriel, Alphys and Sans volunteered their time and strength at a Migospel church near the heart of town. They were cheered on as they used their physical strength, magic and ingenuity to refurbish the sanctuary while small monsters helped on the periphery. Then the steeple bell rang, signifying noon, and everyone went outdoors for the great unexpected luncheon. The tradition for the great unexpected luncheon was that no food would be provided but that which monsters chose to bring, unannounced, out of the goodness of their hearts. They would all express surprise at finding tables set out, and would quietly slip their contributions onto said tables, reasoning that if they were all there anyway, they might as well have lunch. Everyone would be delightedly surprised by everyone else's contribution and presence, so that it seemed like a potluck born from sheer serendipity. Toriel brought pie, of course. She just happened to have a sack with her containing no fewer than fifteen fresh pies, which she brought out one by one to Alphys's increasing amazement. How had she managed to keep them hot? She'd ask later, but for now she knew it would be a faux pas.
When the 'unexpected' banquet was done, most monsters returned to their homes, but a surprising number chose to return to Toriel's house. That morning it had just been the three of them, but by two in the afternoon the house was packed. Various random objects were brought out from storage to serve as tiny chairs. There were Whimsuns watching from the rafters and Parsniks roasting gently at the fireplace. The talkative rock from the catacombs did her best to provide extra seating (and conversation). Spiders went about spinning a glimmering web: MERRY XMAS, it said. They then arrayed themselves in a decorative oval around these words, letting the web serve as a resting place for the proceedings.
The Froggits performed a traditional frog song to which all present listened reverently. They then led the whole assemblage in chorus through several more carols of good will and historical figures. Following this, gifts were given. Blooky showed up to little fanfare and quietly told everyone (after a few failed tries to get their attention) that they had a gift from Shyren for the whole party—this was a CD containing a concert performed by Shyren and her amalgamated sister, in duet. Most of it was quiet humming, for which everyone had to be especially silent, but there were a few parts with weirder sounds that might have come from Lemon Bread's constant companions, or perhaps from banging on bottles or pots. At the end of the final track, following twenty seconds of total silence, was Shyren's tiny voice, saying in a whisper: "Merry Xmas." To which Lemon Bread exclaimed, in a dozen jovial voices, "You did it!" And then the album ended and the party erupted in applause and laughter.
Sans's gift to Alphys was that he'd secretly brought back her entire comic and manga collection from her lab, instead of the three or four books at a time he'd been pretending to manage. Alphys hugged him, not at all upset to be deceived or to be given something she already owned. Her gift to him was a thick, natty rug for his room, complete with trapdoor triggers he could set to make things mysteriously disappear and reappear elsewhere. Toriel had sewn Sans a new outfit, including a visored cap with a picture of Papyrus's face on it. (He proceeded to proudly wear it backwards.) He gave Toriel a packet of seeds he'd gathered from every corner of the Underground. They weren't marked or sorted in any way, but he said it would be a better surprise that way. Toriel hugged him too, lifting him off the ground, and said she did not doubt it would make for many interesting gardens.
A Whimsalot clattered its helmet and asked, through gestures, what Toriel and Alphys were giving to each other. Toriel cleared her throat and stood with some embarrassment. "I am afraid that my gift to Alphys will not be a public one. I will give it to her later, once everyone has gone home."
The monsters exchanged looks. "oh… i know how it is," said Napstablook. "when your gift is so bad you don't want anyone else to see it… even the person you're giving it to, only you kind of have to let them see it…"
Alphys leapt in. "W-w-well I don't care if Toriel's gift is embarrassing! B-because my gift for her is a little embarrassing too. It's not even really… a gift for her! It's just… well, it's not here, either. We'll have to go to my lab!"
Toriel clasped her hands together in excitement. "Is everyone invited?"
"Uh, s-sure! Everyone can come see."
"Then let us go to the lab!" announced Toriel, holding open the door for Alphys so that she could lead the way.
It was a long walk to the old warehouse. Not everyone made it, but most of the small monsters bore up and endured the trek, even if the mood did fall from jovial to solemn along the way. No one was speaking by the time they got there, a parade of expectant beings on the most important day of their calendar.
Alphys led them in past half-built shunt- and series-wound motors, past burbling cooling mechanisms and whirling wheels drawing wire from aluminum rod. She was happy to show off everything she'd been working on, but the real excitement was behind that sliding wall. Back when she'd begun her quest to rebuild civilization in the boondocks, her goal had been bringing electricity to everyone—once they had a power grid, they could start thinking about rebuilding the city the way it once was, or better. But ever since her chat with Sans had led her to the spider's bake sale, she'd had a new goal. A shiny, concrete goal… not that concrete was shiny, but… it was something definite she could work toward with real emotional impact. And she was so nervous about how it would be received that she'd decided the previous night to just disable her nervousness circuits and go nerveless for a while. …It hadn't worked very well.
"Everyone… Toriel… um… I, um… well, this is embarrassing. I rehearsed so many different versions of this speech that I forgot which one I decided to go with. Aheheh!"
Toriel placed her hand on Alphys's shoulder. "It is all right. Simply explain what you have done!"
Somehow, Toriel always cut to the pith of a situation. "Well… all right. I've been working for nearly a year on your gift, Tori… and, um… well, I hope you like it!" She struggled to keep her hands from shaking as she pulled the cord that raised the wall.
Instantly there was a chittering among the spiders, scattered though they were throughout the crowd. They moved forward and separated themselves from the other monsters so that they could see more clearly… not that everyone wasn't stirring with excitement at the sight of the shiny silver vehicle.
"ooohh… is it a dragster?" asked Napstablook.
Sans laughed. "al, did you give tori a new car? that's so cliche it's funny. but where's she supposed to drive it?"
Toriel stood with her fingers framing her mouth in amazement. "I am not… I am not really the driving sort!" she exclaimed. "Is this really for me?"
Alphys grinned her biggest grin for her moment of triumph. "No! It's not for you!"
The beauty in Toriel's confusion as she smiled to Alphys—it was one of those expressions that make knowing other people worthwhile, even for the staunchest introvert. Only someone like Tori could pull off beautiful confusion. "Then who is it for?"
Alphys leapt in excitement. "It's for the spiders! They've been separated from their cousins in Hotland for who knows how long… and they c-can't get back together because of the cold weather in Snowdin… and they only have so many snowshoes and overcoats… so they've been… they've been holding bake sales for ages to raise money for a… for a heated limousine… so they can all be reunited… so I decided to… I decided…"
"i'll be damned," said Sans. "you built one."
"I… I BUILT one!" Alphys laughed a giddy laugh, releasing the stomach bugs of a hundred stressful days slaving over sparking cables and camshafts and brake pumps, all the while unsure if she could do it. "It's built with fine, touch-sensitive controls so spiders can drive… and by my calculations, there's enough room in it for the entire Ruins clan!" She faced the spiders and recalled Arachnamate's final words to her. "You can… you can go home," she told them.
The chittering grew so intense Alphys was afraid. The Whimsuns scattered and the Vegetoids started cackling. The host of spiders poured right onto Alphys and past her, crawling up the sides of the limousine, pouring through cracks in the gaskets, feeling its surface with their hairy feet, smothering it with appraisal. Alphys collapsed to a fetal position as the spiders covered her, but as they passed by, she gathered her courage and stood up, nervously watching. She watched as the spiders fiddled with the controls, adjusting the rear view mirrors and turning the steering wheel. A bracing sound abruptly filled the lab—WHOM WHOMM. Everybody cringed: they'd found the horn.
Alphys turned to Toriel, fearing her reaction, and found her with one hand curled tightly at her solar plexus, the other pressed against it, her mouth gaping in astonishment and her ears actually up—the first time Alphys had ever seen them that way. A whisper of uncontrolled laughter sounded quietly from her. She turned her wide eyes upon Alphys.
"I cannot believe it," she said simply. "I just cannot believe it. After all these centuries."
Alphys hurried to her and stood tall, afraid to hug her, afraid to offer her hands.
The car's headlights flashed on and off. "But… but in what sense is this my gift?" Toriel asked, flabbergasted.
"Well, it's, uh…" Alphys's prepared explanation eluded her. "It's not, really… I mean, it is, but… I mean, it's technically yours, and you get to give it to the spiders… I just, um…" She scratched her head, bashful as anything. "I just wanted to give you something that would amaze you, and I… and I didn't think anything would make you feel really, really good unless it was… for someone else… and I know that it doesn't make any sense, and I… I kind of cheated you out of an Xmas gift because now, not only do you not get a real gift from me, but you're going to lose the spiders… these friends you've had for as long as you've been here… they're probably going to go home, and they'll be gone, and you'll miss them… and the Ruins will be that much more empty… so if you're mad at me, I… I can understand… and um… but… I'm hoping that maybe…"
She wasn't able to finish; Toriel swept her up in a deluxe hug, the sort that carries one literally and figuratively to another place. "Alphys! This is…" Sobs actually kept her from speaking unimpeded. ":…the best gift… bar none… that I have ever been given… and I am blown away… I do not know what to say…" Alphys felt herself erratically spun around as Toriel took uncalculated steps this way and that.
"Just… just say thank you!" Alphys squealed, trying to hug back. "And that'll… that'll make me so happy!"
Toriel placed Alphys on the ground and clasped her hands before her chin, laughing. "THANK you!" she exulted. Then she gestured to the spiders, who now swarmed all without and within the silver luxury car. "Spiders of the Ruins… you have been my most faithful friends over the many scores of years I have dwelt here… and I will miss you sorely… But I wish you to be reunited with your kin, and with your queen, and I give you…" Her voice caught, and she had to swallow before continuing. "I give you this limousine, that you may travel the snowy wastes, without reservation. It is yours." She wiped her eyes and repeated: "It is yours. I only ask that, now and then, a small few of you will visit me. I would like… I would like to keep sending letters to my friends on the outside! And I do appreciate the newspapers you occasionally bring."
A smattering of tiny voices chittered, and the spiders on the windows of the car formed themselves into words: "WE WILL ALWAYS BE YOUR FRIENDS."
Toriel sniffled and raised a hand to still her trembling jaw. Alphys was glad to see she wasn't the only one who did that now and then. Even the serenest of the serene could occasionally be thrown off balance. And Alphys had made it happen! Alphys was the reason Toriel looked the way she did right now. It was like she'd met a swan and taught her how to open her wings.
All the small monsters were cheering. Alphys had her payment. All the afternoons of labor. All the setbacks and frustrations and tedious tasks. They'd all been worth it. She was paid back in full now. She had the memory of a lifetime, and it was right now, all around her.
The car's ignition started, jarring her back to her senses. "Uh! W-w-wait! I, uh… I need to show you how it works!" She ran over to the car and scrabbled at the window.
It lowered itself for her as the spiders welcomed her in.
The level of hubbub barely sank for an hour. Alphys showed the spiders all the ins and outs of the car—and it seemed she never had to explain things more than once, because if one spider didn't remember or understand her explanations, dozens of others did. And that let her go into detail. So she described every aspect of the limousine she'd built from scratch, using what she now knew was magic to augment her science, making the process easier and smoother for her than it would be for almost anyone else, and she was proud of that fact. Anyone else might have taken a century to make this gift, and it had taken her only ten months. Did that make Alphys any less proud? It was right for her to use her gifts where they were most useful, wasn't it? But to be fair, this was kind of off the scale—Alphys had never been this proud, not even when she'd made Royal Scientist—so her judgment might not be entirely reliable just now.
She gave the spiders her spare cell phone so they could keep touch on the road. All the denizens of the Ruins went to see them off. Getting the limo down Toriel's back steps and through her basement was a little tricky—Alphys hadn't gotten around to building an accordion-based spring-walker for it—but with the help of the Whimsalots and their quest-inspired strength, they managed it with minimal property damage. The spiders waved a few dozen of themselves out the window in a giant chain as the car drove off through the snowy wastes. Alphys felt a hand on her shoulder as they watched it go. She turned back; it was Sans.
He shifted his attention from the vanishing car to her. "hey. you know what?"
Alphys trembled. "No—what?"
He took a breath before he spoke. "i think there's light in my life again."
This overwhelmed Alphys. "Really?"
His smile changed subtly. Had it gotten more heartfelt? "yeah. took long enough, didn't it?"
Overcoming her nerves, she threw herself around Sans. The small monsters applauded their hug.
They called several times. But their calls always sounded like a big rustling blanket made of wool, and their texts were mostly made of eight-eyed emoticons, so communication was tricky. Eventually they reported making it to the edge of Waterfall, where, so far as Alphys and Toriel could decipher, they found a place to park under a cascade of endless falling rocks. In a panic, Alphys texted back that that sounded like the worst possible place to park, but they assured her that somehow the rocks never did any damage, and they were off to rejoin the Hotland clan! Everyone waited nervously in Toriel's house, drinking tea and playing checkers by Froggit rules, until a joyous Brrrrrrrriing cut the air and Toriel picked up her phone. Caller: MUFFET.
The two laughed and giggled for a good five minutes before saying much of anything intelligible. Then Toriel put Muffet on speakerphone, and they replayed Alphys's big reveal and discussed every aspect of the car, and Muffet described the familial reunions she was witnessing, and the comparisons of web spinning techniques that had developed, and the exchanging of family histories… and after half an hour, she abruptly said, "Ut! I'll be right over, dearie," and hung up the phone.
Everyone gaped at each other. Did she really mean…?
That was dusk. Well into the evening, Muffet showed up at the purple door wearing her best finery, a dress that seemed to be covered with gleaming eyes, open on the left side and sleeping on the right. She lifted Alphys with five arms at once and gave her a strange kiss that somehow left a flavor after it was done. Behind her, scuttling gracefully… oh! Oh, how wonderful! It was Arachnamate! With terrifying speed, the amalgamate lifted Alphys in at least a hundred silky arms. It kissed her and kissed her and kissed her until she was laughing the laugh of the ticklish.
"Doctor. I am so pleased to see you.
I am so pleased to see you. Was
am so pleased to see you. Was it
so pleased to see you. Was it really
pleased to see you. Was it really my
to see you. Was it really my kindness
see you. Was it really my kindness that
you. Was it really my kindness that saved
Was it really my kindness that saved you?"
"Yes!" Alphys squealed. "Yes, just by trying to keep me safe! Even though I r-r-rejected you. You still planted a seed of hope. And I can… I can never repay you!"
The giant white spider lowered her ever so gently to the floor, attending to where her feet were. It bowed deeply, filaments splaying everywhere.
"it really my kindness that saved you? Then
really my kindness that saved you? Then you
my kindness that saved you? Then you will
kindness that saved you? Then you will forever
that saved you? Then you will forever be
saved you? Then you will forever be my
you? Then you will forever be my greatest
* ABSORBED *
Then you will forever be my greatest fount
you will forever be my greatest fount of
will forever be my greatest fount of pride."
Alphys giggled and rubbed the amorphous head. Toriel stepped forward to offer her own heartfelt thanks to the amalgamate. Then the whole carload of spiders skittered out into the catacombs, and Muffet got her first look at where her distant kin had been living for so long. The limousine had been stuffed to the gills; even more spiders had come back than had left that afternoon. They scampered all over the ancient puzzles and spun new celebratory heritage webs meant to last a month, and talked in their spider language and swung from the ceiling and ate and drank and danced, and then everyone crammed back into Toriel's house for one last rendition of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Xmas" around the tree, with everyone holding hands, wings, pedipalps or whatever was available to hold. Then came the hugs and goodbyes, and those were an event in themselves.
It wasn't until midnight that the assemblage of spiders finally packed themselves back into the heated limo to head homeward, promising to visit en masse again soon, and the small monsters finished their revelry and went wearily on their way, and Blooky disappeared when no one was looking, and the talkative rock chatted up a storm before finally taking a hint and rolling off, and Sans yawned wearily and retired to bed.
Alphys was still trembling on the inside even as she slipped on her nightcap. She was ready to give bed the old college try, but at the edge of the hallway she was halted by an oddly urgent utterance: "Wait, doctor."
She looked back. Toriel stood in the foyer, looking strangely vulnerable.
"Wh—what is it?"
"Do not be afraid! It is just that… Xmas is nearly over, and I have not yet given you your gift! I know it is late, but… I feel it would be better not to wait until tomorrow."
Alphys tingled. She'd forgotten entirely that Toriel still owed her a gift. Not that she needed a gift—the happiness she'd been drenched with all day had been like gifts a hundred times over, and she felt like the queen of the world—but any gift from Toriel would have to be meaningful, wouldn't it? And why had she wanted to wait for everyone to go home? "Oh! Um, yes! That's right… what was it that you were going to, um, give me?" She tapped her hands together nervously.
Toriel, oddly, seemed no less nervous. "I th—I think it would be best for us to go to one of our bedrooms for the presentation of this gift. Which would you prefer?"
Oh gosh. What was this, even? "Um… I get to see mine all the time, so… yours?"
"As you like!" Toriel led the way to her own room. She gestured a hand toward the bed, and Alphys sat there obediently. Then Toriel closed the door and stood in the middle of the room. It looked like she was having a hard time composing herself.
"Wh-what is it?" asked Alphys, now concerned. "Are you worried I won't like your gift? Tori, you don't need to worry about that—even if you didn't get me anything at all, I wouldn't be disappointed, I've had the most amazing day—"
"Alphys," said Toriel.
Alphys was silent.
"I am sorry… this is difficult for me. I did not… I did not expect it to be so difficult."
"It's okay, Tori!"
She took a breath, though it didn't seem to calm her much. "You must understand, Alphys… I was faced with a quandary when it came to selecting a gift for you. You are an amazing woman with the ability to create nearly anything you can envision, and to envision nearly anything you desire! Ever since you arrived in the Ruins, you have been making things, and making things, and the Ruins are so much richer for it… but what could I possibly offer that you could not create for yourself? I could sew you a new outfit, true, but I have been sewing clothes for you regardless, and as such that did not seem sufficiently… special."
Alphys let her feet press against the edge of the mattress and leaned forward. "I'm—I'm sure I would have loved it anyway!"
"But you deserve something special, doctor!" She paused to collect herself. "Doubly so, after your tremendous surprise today! I asked myself: is there anything I possess that she could not provide for herself? Anything that I would not freely share with her, Xmas or not? At first I could think of nothing." Her voice broke. "Do you—do you perceive my problem?"
Alphys swallowed. "Yes! Yes, I guess I… I guess I am a little hard to shop for when there aren't any stores, huh?"
"Precisely!" agreed Toriel. "But then… I realized that I do possess something you desire. Something that you have been asking for, explicitly or not, for almost your entire time here with me. It is very much in my power to provide, and… and while I do not understand why, I know that it would make you happy." Her ears twitched. "And I cannot very well deny you the gift you most desire. Not on Xmas. Especially not now."
Alphys leaned forward even further until just the tip of her tail was keeping her from falling off the bed. "…Yes?"
Toriel took one last breath. "You have, on numerous occasions, expressed an interest in my bare form. I cannot fathom what fascinates you so about my knees and shoulders, but if that is what you desire… I will bare myself for you. I will remove my robe, and my underclothes, and I will stand before you uncovered. It is not something I have ever done for anyone but my husband, but…" Her eyes pled. "Would this please you, Alphys?"
Alphys leapt off the bed, euphoric, having barely dared to hope. "Oh! Oh my god. Yes! Please. Please, Tori. You don't know what this means to me."
The woolly queen smiled and wiped away a tear. "Then I give myself to you, Alphys. Or at least, the sight of me. That is my gift. And it is a true gift, in that it is yours to keep. Even after I am dressed again, this gift will still be yours. As such, you have the right to ask me, at any time, to undress for you. There is no limitation on your use of this gift. I will do my best to bear it patiently, and kindly… and I will even permit you to touch me, if that is what you desire."
Alphys shook with emotion. "Oh Tori!" She reached out for the purple robe, then withdrew her hands, feeling foolish. Her own gift was put to shame by this. Alphys had given Toriel nothing, nothing at all, and this… this…!"
Toriel drew a shaky breath. "Would you like me to disrobe in your sight, or would you prefer to turn away?"
Alphys could tell Toriel was trying to be strong. She could see this was difficult for her. So difficult. But she was doing it. She was doing it, for Alphys… just for her… "Oh, Tori. You don't have to do this. I just love that… I just love you're willing to! If it hurts you, I don't want you to do it." She fell to her knees and pawed at the robe. "I just think you're so beautiful…"
Toriel laughed the most painful laugh, dipping her head. "This is what I mean. This is preposterous. I am not beautiful. But I will not allow you to shame me, doctor. I will undress for you."
"Well, th-then… I'd like to watch," Alphys said meekly. "I'd like to see. You can… do it in front of me."
Toriel nodded solemnly. "Very well." She paused for a second, then reached to unbutton her robe at the back of the neck.
As gracefully as one can remove a pullover garment, she pulled it up and off… and Alphys was stunned. It was like how Alphys imagined it must feel to see the sun, suddenly, from behind a cloud, or through a window—so much light it could hurt the eyes if you weren't careful. Alphys wanted to see the sun someday, but this… it couldn't be better than this, could it? So much whiteness, so much perfection, all at once…
Toriel put a hand on her undershirt. "Are you pleased so far, doctor?" She'd managed to let a little amusement into her voice.
"Y-y-y-y-yes!" stammered Alphys, staring up. "Um… can you… ta… take off the rest of it, please?"
Toriel gave a resigned little smile. She pulled off her undershirt, then her white panties, and placed them over a chair. Then she stood before Alphys in the nude. A body that was physiologically forty-six and physically forty-nine hundred years old… yet it seemed ageless, ageless, no trace of age anywhere. Pure white. Pure, soft, loving wool. Perfect shapes. Perfect movement. There wasn't much to contemplate, not in words or symbols. That was what perfection did—it made your brain speechless. Alphys's brain was hardly ever speechless. This was just perfection, and it was as simple as that.
"Doctor! I am afraid you will start drooling!"
"Uh-h-h…" She forced herself back to the realm of the cognizant, the realm of sapience. "I'm… I'm really enjoying this… um… sorry if I'm not very talkative right now… you're just… um… stunning!"
Toriel's ears curled in bashfully. She blushed just slightly, so subtly the pink was barely visible, but it was there. Alphys soaked it in. "Can you… um, go down on your knees? I want to… I want to feel your face, if that's all right."
Toriel complacently lowered herself, one knee at a time. Alphys peered at her blushing face, then felt the wool covering it. It was so delicate. So light, yet full enough that the whiteness was unbreaking—a rose tint was just showing through, but nothing was breaking. She rubbed her own cheek against Toriel's cheek. She hugged her around the chest. She rested her head on her shoulder.
"Are you happy, Alphys?" murmured Toriel.
"You have no idea," Alphys replied. In truth, even she had no idea how happy she was. Like her pride, right now it was off the charts.
"Merry Xmas, my friend," the boss monster whispered.
"Merry Xmas," cooed Alphys. She slid down Toriel's body in a helical path and found herself confronted with her tail. Oh. That tail! That perky, flare-tipped, secret little tail! She wouldn't have been sure Toriel even had one, except that she'd occasionally mentioned sitting on it oddly or having had it pulled by one of her children. It was too small to do much of anything—Alphys wasn't even sure what it was good for—but she didn't need to ask right now. Right now, she just wanted to look at it. And… and to stroke it, maybe? Oh god, yes—before she knew it, Alphys was stroking Toriel's tail.
"Are you trying to get me excited?" accused Toriel.
"N-no! I'm just…" Alphys lowered her voice humbly. "I'm just really enjoying you, that's all."
The large white calves flexed, their contours as perfect as ever. "It is mystifying to me how this weary old body can give such pleasure to someone so virile and young!"
Alphys cuddled the small of Toriel's back. "It's mystifying to me how you don't see your own beauty!"
A fluffy hand settled on Alphys's own back. "Perhaps I am simply too used to it! Or perhaps your feelings toward me are singular. But I will say this. You have convinced me—at long last, doctor—that your physical affection for me is not a joke."
"Of course it's not a joke! I love you! Body, mind and soul." Alphys wanted to whimper it, to cry out loud, to plead. She rubbed the firm wool before her. "I just wish… I just wish you could be mine, and I… and I could be yours. But this… this is so close, and I'm so happy… I really appreciate this gift, Tori." She sat back, contentedly taking in the tremendous beauty of the snow-white form before her, gently stroking the tender tail…
And time could have stopped like that. But then Toriel stood up.
"Wh… what is it, Tori? Did I… did I hurt you?"
The boss monster shook her head. Her eyes were closed.
"What's wrong?" asked Alphys, starting to worry.
Toriel breathed quietly and shook her head again. "I have been unfair to you," she said. "You have truly loved me, and I have brushed it aside as if it were a joke." She peered through ovaline eyes at Alphys. "That poem that you wrote about me... it was not in jest, was it? You meant every word."
Alphys nodded fearfully.
Toriel was still for several moments. "I think I would like to go for a walk," she said at last.
Alphys clambered to her feet. "I can go with you!"
"Alone," said Toriel.
"Oh," said Alphys, her spirits sinking. Was it over so soon? Hadn't Toriel said the gift had no limits?
"I will not go far," said Toriel. She paused, then strode from the room, leaving the door open as she went. Alphys peeked out and saw her her hurry through the foyer and out the front door.
She didn't dare follow, and she didn't dare sleep.
The yard was cold—as cold as it ever got. It was winter on the surface, a fact that leaked through the mountain despite all the rock it was made of, and the mistral was fierce and low. Toriel walked naked through the yard, feet crunching dead leaves, hearing only one thing in her mind:
She is not yours. Be still, fluttering heart, be still. You belong to the Asgore who once was. She is not yours. True, she is an amazing catch, but she is not yours. You belong to the Asgore who once was. Be still, my fluttering heart—she is not yours! And you are not hers! You belong to the Asgore who once was! You belong to… belong to…
Toriel's forehead was on the tree. Her body was slumped, and her head was against the wood of the old tree. She was weary, but she was ready to cast aside her weariness like a worn blanket. She cried without sobs. Why was this so painful? Why was there pain? In the midst of greatest happiness, pain!
Hello, Tori. It's always a pleasure to see you.
She gasped, barely aware if she was awake or dreaming. But she spoke. How could she not?
Hello, Asgore. Did you know, in the past, I have spoken to the 'Asgore who once was', to distinguish between you and the Asgore who now is. But now, I suppose it is all one, is it not? Either way, I am speaking to someone beyond this world.
It's true. My burden is over. And I'm not sure whether to be upset that I failed, or relieved. But it is over, one way or another.
You would never have wanted war! Toriel cried. The Asgore I knew would never have moved toward war as an objective! Not truly.
Not truly. But there was the appearance to keep up, Tori. There was hope to be fostered.
Hope that was rancid with hatred and the desire for vengeance.
Yes. It was rancid hope. It was so much less than what hope could be. But we lived on it, Tori. We lived on it. We haven't yet perished from the earth.
Oh, Asgore! Toriel sobbed. She could feel the bark of the rotten tree giving way beneath her arms, but her attention wasn't there at present.
Do you have hope, Tori? How are you getting along these days?
I…? I… I am happy, Gorey. I am surprised to say so. I had been lonely for so long that I had forgotten how to be happy… but despite everything, somehow, it has come back to me. It has been forced upon me. I have…
…Have you met someone, Tori?
She wet the bark with her tears. I have! I never expected it… I never could have foreseen the way it would happen…
Do you like him? Is he… as strapping as me?
She looked up, finding the humor in it. It is a she, actually. And she is hunched and tubby. She could perhaps not even lift your trident. But she is… she is my light.
Deep laughter vibrated through Toriel. Tori. You never fail to amaze me. Can you be happy with this person?
I don't know! I belong to you! All that is good in me… all that is pure, or worthy, or beautiful… is yours as well. It all stems from my union with you! I do not… I do not know how to love alone.
You don't?
No, Gorey. I have no idea how to love alone. I can never… be my best, without you.
Well. Then the solution is simple. I'll simply have to love along with you.
Realization flooded through Toriel. It was like a wind over a sheer white rock, a sideways cleansing rain. Can you do that? Will you always be with me?
Don't you think I already am, Tori? Why else would you be talking with me now?
But… but how can I love her, if I belong to you?
We are one, Tori. We belong to ourselves… but that doesn't mean we can't give ourselves to someone else. Someone we think is worthy.
But I belong with you, Asgore!
Then I'll be with you. We can love this person together. Do you think I'd like her?
Toriel smiled bitterly. After you changed… you knew her. You did like her then, I think. The scientist? Doctor Alphys?
Astonished laughter rode the chill of the mistral's underbelly. Dr. Alphys? Gaster's successor? Oh, Tori! You fell in love with the lizard girl?
She touched her own heart, feeling its tenderness. Not yet. But I wish to! I dearly wish to love her.
…Do you really think she's worthy of our love?
…Yes. I do. I absolutely do.
Then let's love her. I wouldn't have guessed Alphys, Tori. Not in a hundred guesses. But I trust you. I trust you more than I trust myself. If you say she's worthy of our love… then by all means, let's love her.
Really? Are you certain, Asgore?
I release you, Toriel. You are no longer mine. I will always be with you, but I release you. You're free to love whomever you please.
Gorey… She reached out, and her hand was tickled by crumbled pieces of blowing leaves.
I release you. I've missed you, Tori.
And I… I have never stopped missing you. Not once.
I'm not really here, of course. I'm gone now. But I'll always be with you.
We shall love her together. You and I.
I wish I could stay. You have no idea…
Gorey…
…how much I want to ask if you'd like a cup of tea…
Oh, Gorey.
She felt the wind tearing against her temples. She raised her head. A piece of Asgore's forehead in the carving on the old tree had crumbled away at her touch. She stood up. It did not bother her. The carving would all wear away, in time, but he would remain. As he was. As he always was.
Always.
She found her senses and stumbled inside from the chill. For a while she rested on the floor of the foyer, regaining heat and sensibility.
"Tori?" Alphys was at the entrance to the hall, looking worried.
"I am all right, Alphys. It is fine. It will all be fine."
That did not keep Alphys from hurrying to her, of course. That was as it should be. She rested on hands and knees in the doctor's embrace. So unlike Asgore's, yet so urgent and so real.
"Alphys, I am sorry for worrying you. You have been very patient. I know how many times you have held back, since that day you asked to see my arms, and realized that you had upset me."
"I'm so sorry for that, Toriel. I got carried away. You know I get carried away sometimes."
Yes. She did. And that was, in truth, a very attractive feature. "It is all right. Because I forgive you, and with the exception of a certain chalk drawing, you have been very restrained and thoughtful since then. You have been so very patient with this silly old woman." She laughed, coughing up traces of leaf dust as she did.
Alphys fetched her a glass of water. "Here, Tori."
She rose to a kneeling position, conscious of her nudity, and drank. "Thank you! Do you know, Alphys? I am glad that you are enjoying my Xmas gift. It is the most precious gift I have ever given, with the exception of when I gave myself to Asgore at my wedding. Yet I feel that after your amazing gift to me… and given how very good you have been over the seasons… that I owe you another gift. I feel that it is meet. I feel that you have earned it many times over. And I can only apologize for how long it has taken me to give."
Alphys looked so pale in the dim light. "But… but what is it?" she asked, mystified.
Toriel smiled as broadly as she could ever remember, even though her face was still tinged by tears. "I will love you," she said simply. "I will do my very, honest best, to love you."
Alphys gasped. "Oh, Tori!" Even in the darkness, Toriel could see the end of her tail curl.
"And I do not mean as one loves a neighbor, or a friend. I will love you as you deserve to be loved. As a lover. As a sweet, true, beautiful lover."
Alphys squealed. She did no less than squeal aloud in pure glee. No words, it seemed, could mark this moment for her. But then she dashed to Toriel and started caressing her, her head against Toriel's belly. "Do you mean it? Can you really… are you really able? I mean… you don't find me ugly?"
"No, not at all, Alphys! Not at all. In fact, from now on, I will be doing my best to find you beautiful! I suspect it will be easier than you think!"
She looked up hopefully. "Will you… will you write poems about me?"
The last of the chill in Toriel's heart melted. "I will!" she decided. "That is a challenge, but I will be glad to take it up!"
"I can't believe it!" squealed the lizard, squeezing her harder. "I get to see you naked, plus make you speechless with happiness, p-plus I get to be your girlfriend… all in the same day?!"
Toriel rocked Alphys gently in the darkness. "Not so loud, my sweet thing! You will wake up Sans!"
"nah, you don't have to worry about that," said Sans from the living room doorway, one slipper against the frame. "i'm a sound sleeper."
"Oh my God! Sans!" exclaimed Alphys.
Toriel's hands moved to cover her breasts. So this was how her Xmas was to end. Kneeling naked on the floor in the dark in front of both her housemates. And to think, just a year ago, she had expected to be lonely for all her remaining years. The turns that life takes…
"don't worry, tori. i'm not looking. i found a really interesting crack in the ceiling to check out."
"Sans, have you been eavesdropping?" Toriel demanded.
"i was fetching a little midnight snack." He held up a piece of leftover pie. "then i heard alphys make a noise i assume was happy. so you two are really a couple now, huh? no more holding back?"
Alphys squeezed Toriel's side. "I g-guess so! I'm so excited."
"Yes," Toriel replied. "I had to commune with Asgore in order to let myself make this decision… but we are lovers now, and we will share in everything."
"So that's why you ran out the door," marveled Alphys. "You had to talk to Asgore!"
Toriel planted a kiss on the reptile's forehead. "I am glad we decided to build the shrines. On this occasion, they were just what I needed."
"And he… and he's okay with me? I mean.. I know you didn't really talk to Asgore… but the… the version of him you talked to… he doesn't mind you loving me?"
"My dear Alphys, he is here, loving you along with me! He has turned all his energies to it, as have I. Together, we will surely succeed!"
"Oh boy," Alphys murmured, shocked.
Toriel leaned further against her companion and buried her in a deep, woolly hug. Knowing that her body was cold, she released fire magic into her belly and chest and arms, letting them warm Alphys through the chill. "After all," she teased. "Did you not say that you would like to be the filling in a sandwich between myself and Asgore?"
Alphys laughed and squealed and kicked her feet. "Yes! Yes, I did!"
"Well then, in a manner of speaking, you have your wish. I love you, Royal Scientist Alphys. There is nothing holding me back any longer."
"well, guess my work here is done," said Sans, who now stood at the front door. "i'll go ahead and make myself scarce. glad you two finally got together. i'll come back for my stuff later."
Toriel looked up fiercely at him. "Sans, you are not going anywhere," she commanded.
He paused, his hand on the knob. "you sure?"
Alphys, too, untucked herself from Toriel's embrace and called to him. "I don't want you to leave, Sans! We're such a good family. Can't you… can't you stay?"
"heh. i was only joking. 'course i'm staying. i wouldn't miss this for all the ketchup in grillby's fridge." He wandered around to the hallway. "i'll be hitting the hay now. congrats, you two."
"Good night, Sans."
"Good night!"
They stayed together, somewhat tangled, after he had disappeared into his room. Alphys looked wonderingly at Toriel. "Do you really think he was joking?"
"I cannot say, Alphys. I think there are times when even Sans is not aware whether he is joking until events play themselves out."
Alphys laughed. "Like quantum superposition! He was only joking if we wanted him to be!"
Toriel laughed and poked a finger into Alphys's belly, evincing a shocked squeal. "Precisely. I relish how you are able to inject scientific ideas into even the most intimate moments!"
Alphys blushed and looked sheepish. "Um, I… I guess I…"
"That is one of the many things I will grow to love about you. Would you like to come to bed with me, doctor?"
"B-bed? With.. with you?" The scaled tail slapped the floor. "Seriously?"
Toriel smiled. "Is there any reason we should still sleep alone?"
"Oh my gosh… no! There—there isn't! Oh my gosh, Tori! We're going to sleep together!"
"Nothing would delight me more. The only question remaining is: Would you like me to carry you over the threshold?"
Alphys grinned and took a moment mustering an answer. "If—if you would! I love being carried by you."
Toriel climbed ceremoniously to her feet and hoisted Alphys up to her naked bosom. "I believe we can safely say that this has been the best Xmas ever, can we not?"
Alphys's laughter shook even Toriel's belly. "Yes! I think it's even… I think this was the best day of my life!"
Toriel walked toward the hallway. "It is not quite over yet, my dear one."
Alphys laughed with sheer excitement. They paused at the bedroom door.
"My wish for us, doctor," said Toriel, "is that the year to come will be equally merry."
"Yes!" shouted Alphys, hugging tight. "Let's… let's make it merry!"
Toriel bestowed one last kiss, the gentlest yet, on her burden's head. Then she walked easily into her bedroom, carrying Alphys, and shut the door behind them.
It was a new beginning.
AND NOW YOUR GIFT:
A HOLIDAY BONUS SONG
Tori, You're Beautiful
(To "Baby, It's Cold Outside" by Frank Loesser)
T: I do not understand…
A: (Tori, you're beautiful!)
T: But why hold my hand?
A: (Tori, you're beautiful!)
T: And why do you speak
A: (I really like your physique.)
T: This way to me?
A: (It fits your personality!)
T: I am only a pathetic widow.
A: (You're the greatest person I know.)
T: I could not save a single child.
A: (I know that you've been drowning in grief.)
T: Their bodies are not even buried!
A: (But that's all right-they're easily carried!)
T: I cannot reach them while exiled!
A: (But now their graves should bring you relief.)
T: My clothing is frumpy.
A: (But Tori, you're wonderful.)
T: My belly is lumpy.
A: (Tori, you're wonderful!)
T: I wish you would stop
A: (It really is true)
T: This strange charade.
A: (I really AM in love with you!)
T: I failed in my role as mother.
A: (I wish that you were my lover...)
T: I failed in my role as wife.
A: (Because you're the brightest thing in my life!)
T: And so, I cannot believe...
A: (I mean it truly:)
T: That I am beautiful!
A: (Tori, you're beautiful!)
[instrumental break]
T: Are we singing a duet?
A: We sure are!
T: But Alphys… you are young and ambitious… there are so many more exciting people you should be singing duets with!
A: B-but I don't want them, Toriel! I only want you!
[end break]
A: You're gentle and wise...
T: (But I am not beautiful.)
A: And look at those thighs!
T: (I am not beautiful!)
A: I love how your ears
T: (But never in all my years)
A: Droop down your chest.
T: (Have I met someone with your zest!)
A: Your figure is really nifty!
T: (My measurements are triple-50!)
A: And that's what I call perfection!
T: (I do not have a visible waist.)
A: You're built like a Doric column...
T: (I'm only good for looking solemn.)
A: And I love every single section!
T: (My body is the color of paste.)
A: Your wool is so pure!
T: (Still, I am not beautiful.)
A: You're sweet and demure!
T: (How could I be beautiful?!)
A: Your horns are points in
T: (You really are genuine!)
A: A sacred crown.
T: (Oh, Alphys, you could blow me down!)
A: For me you'll always be a royal.
T: (You really are bizarrely loyal…)
A: You'll always be my perfect queen
T: (And yet I think I see what you mean!)
A: I'll always love you!
T: (Oh goodness, it's true!)
A: Because Tori, you're beautiful!
T: (I really am beautiful!)
[Sans leans in on trombone]:
A-doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-waaa…
A/N: I wrote this around Christmastime, so my holiday spirit was raging at full blast. I cried multiple times when I wrote it and again when I revised it. I hope you did too!
Oh, and if you don't count the bonus song, it's still shorter than Chapter 16, which I intended to be the longest chapter. So… let's not count the bonus song? Then again, if anyone wants to record themselves and a friend singing the bonus song, that would be amazing!
Can you find the contractions? There's one in Toriel's thought-speech and one in her lyrics! ;)
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