Chapter 35

Martin's week was one of excruciating slowness filled with the usual ailments, emergencies and house calls. The episodes dealing with blood and his reaction to them were the only excitement. He drew blood whenever necessary. The butcher came in with a severe gash on his hand that bled profusely. He stopped the bleeding, stitched and treated it. A fisherman had the biggest hook Martin had ever seen embedded in his wrist, and when removed, blood spurted across his face and on his clothing. A little even went up his nose. He dealt with all of them and had no reaction at all. It was just blood. He was more convinced each time that his phobia was cured. He called Leslie to tell him about his experiences and reaction to them. Leslie was confident of Martin's success but wanted to continue their sessions just in case of a setback. And, he was sure that the board and Dr. Black would want Martin to continue until cleared by them to recommence surgery. He agreed that Martin should talk to his superiors about his progress and wish to become a surgeon again.

Louisa promised herself that she would remain calm and not talk about the phobia unless he brought it up - which he didn't. She crossed her fingers, made deals with the all mighty, and everything else she could think of to ensure that things would work out for Martin. And herself and James Henry. Their happiness was so wrapped up in Martin's. She couldn't imagine her life without him in it. She didn't want to imagine it!

Saturday finally arrived; Martin finished seeing patients and closed the surgery. He had drawn blood twice and treated a ragged, bloody tear that required several stitches on a surfer's leg. He felt at ease just as he had years ago while doing surgery. After a light lunch, he and Louisa loaded the Lexus with all the things that James Henry would need for his first real trip away from home. The only other times he had been in the car were to go to the doctor for his checkups. Martin performed his usual safety check on the car seat before strapping his son in it. He talked easily about Chris and Carol. He liked and respected her and they were comfortable in each other's company. Chris and he were firm friends and had been since they were in medical school together. They soon arrived and received a warm welcome. James Henry, a little unsure of these strangers and new surroundings, pressed close to his Father. Chris and Carol were eager to meet their friend's new baby but wisely kept their distance until he got accustomed to them. After chatting for a few minutes, Carol asked Louisa if she'd like to sit in the kitchen while she finished preparing dinner. The men could talk 'shop' until it was ready.

"Yes, I'd like that very much. Is there anything I can do to help? I'm Martin's trained assistant and have learned quite a bit about cooking from him." Louisa joked as they walked out of the lounge.

Carol giggled and said "And no doubt he's in his immaculate suit and tie even when he washes the dishes! But no thanks. The kids set the table for me after they ate their dinner and, basically, I just have to dish ours up. Well, actually you can help carry things to the table if you'd like." Carol was bustling around, handing bowls to Louisa and filling water glasses. "I cooked lamb chops and lots of fresh veggies. I know how to please Martin!"

"It smells wonderful! Here, let me take the water glasses to the table for you. Should I tell the men it's ready?" Louisa asked as she left the room.

"Yes, please. Chris is starving since he didn't have time to eat lunch today. Some days all he does is put out fires. I'm amazed that he can stay so calm through it all." Carol answered and carried the last of the dishes to the table.

Martin and Chris entered the dining room and Martin still had James Henry in his arms. "Mart, did you bring a carry all for him or should we make a pallet on the floor? Look! He just grinned at me. Hello, little tiger! Can Uncle Chris hold you for a moment?" Chris held James up so that they could look at each other's faces and the baby kicked and cooed in excitement. "Mart, Louisa – he's a fine baby. And strong! Look James, will you let your Auntie Carol hold you a moment?"

Carol eagerly took him in her arms and smiled and talked baby talk to him (Martin described it as ridiculous jabbering) and was rewarded with more grins and coos. He was fine until he saw his Daddy leave the room to get the new carry all. He stared at the door and started fussing so Louisa held him.

"Hush, James. Your Daddy will be right back. Hush now."

When Martin re-entered the dining room, James squealed with delight.

"My goodness! He's certainly a daddy's boy!" Carol exclaimed. This was wonderful! Their friend and his son obviously adored each other.

Martin put the seat on the floor between his and Louisa's chairs and placed James in it. As long as his parents were in sight, he was content and continued to kick and coo happily.

Chris carefully observed his friend. Martin hadn't given him any hints as to what they were to discuss. He looked calm and as happy as Martin was capable of looking, talked easily and seemed to enjoy the meal and the company. He knew that Martin was in counseling but had no information as to how it was going. If he knew his friend, it was bound to be interesting!

Dessert was a fruit tart that fit in with Martin's healthy eating regime. Martin gave Carol a nod of approval and Louisa verbally expressed her satisfaction with the meal. "It was wonderful! The lamb was perfectly cooked. Thank you for preparing it for us."

They all cleared the table over riding Carol's objections. "Martin and I share the chores at home and don't mind in the least helping you. If we all pitch in, we'll have more time together. So, let's work together and get it done." The men showed their agreement by their actions - one scraped, the other rinsed and Louisa loaded the dishwasher. Carol put away the leftovers and they finished quickly.

James Henry started to fret. It was his dinner time, too and he was letting Mommy know it! "I need to feed him. Is there a private place where I can go?"

Chris answered her "Yes, go to the lounge. Martin and I will go to my office and rejoin you later. Martin, shall we?"

Martin nodded and they left the room.

Louisa asked Carol "Do you mind if I feed him in the lounge? Or shall I go somewhere more private?"

"No, no. I don't mind at all. I nursed my boys, too, you know. Have you started him on cereal yet?" Carol replied as she helped Louisa get settled on the sofa.

"Why, no. His pediatrician said I shouldn't until he's six months old. Louisa was a little surprised at the question. "How old were your boys when you started feeding them cereal?"

"Things were different back then I guess. They were four weeks old and I made a thin mixture of my milk and rice cereal. They slept through the night after that. I fed them small portions three times a day, and a few weeks later, I started to add fruit and veggies. Then a little later, meat." Carol replied. "They did fine. I wonder why it changed."

"I don't know but I'm going to talk to our pediatrician about it. My milk won't be enough for much longer. He had been nursing just once a night for a couple of weeks but now he's waking up four and five times a night again. He's getting hungry more often and nurses longer. I'll talk to Martin, too. I bet he knows the whys and wherefores. He usually does!" She ended with a proud laugh.

They had a lot in common so found it easy to carry on a conversation. They were both teachers although Carol worked with special needs children. They were both married to doctors and both were the mother of sons. They were both sure that they were making a good friend.

Chris sat with his arms resting on the desk and Martin in a comfortable wing chair. "Ok, Mart. Tell me what you want to discuss with me." Chris bluntly started the conversation.

Martin leaned forward in his chair and, just as bluntly, answered. "I want to do surgery again."

Chris showed no reaction but, privately, he was cautious and delighted at the same time. He knew his friend well enough to know that the subject would never have come up unless Martin was sure about it. "Ok, tell me the rest of it."

Martin sounded confident, even forceful as he answered. "You know I'm going to counseling? Ok, I had a break through a few months ago – a long buried memory that involved my lovely mother and a dog. I can't describe how stressful it was to remember it. Leslie and I have talked about it and Louisa has been a tremendous support. He feels as I do – my phobia is cured but I should take things slowly. Once the memory was out and I talked about it, it no longer mattered to me. And, you can let your dog in now. I no longer think that I hate them or that they're full of diseases.

I've dealt with several blood issues including drawing blood and treating various wounds with no ill effects at all. I've even had it squirt up my nose! It's just blood." He looked eagerly at Chris, his expression confident. "I know I can't do surgery again right away; that I have to prove myself first. What do you think?"

"So you're telling me that your haemophobia is cured and you want to be a surgeon again. Correct?" Chris asked calmly.

"Yes, that's what I'm saying. I'm a surgeon. It's what I trained for, what I love doing and what I'm good at. So again, what do you think?" Martin asked again.

"What I think is, if you're really cured and can do surgery again, Imperial Hospital will celebrate your return! I'll be delighted that the best surgeon that I've ever known will be back in the operating room again." Chris smiled broadly as he replied.

Martin answered quickly. "London? No, I don't want to move back to London and uproot my family. I'm hoping that there's a place for me at the hospital in Truro. It's a very good hospital but their surgery department could use help."

Chris stood up and answered. "I think that the Truro hospital is unbelievably lucky. Before we go any further, I have to talk to the board and certainly the director of the hospital, Dr. Petronella Black, about it. Now you tell me, how can we convince them that you're ready to perform surgery again? If it were you making the decision, what would you want to hear? Give me some suggestions to take to the board. While you're thinking, I need to do something. Excuse me a moment, please."

Martin stood and walked to the window and formulated reasoned arguments as to why the hospital should give him a chance.

Chris walked back in with their dogs. They had rescued a mixed breed dog since they had last seen Martin. As usual, the dogs made a bee line for him. Instead of recoiling in disgust, he reached down and rubbed their heads. "Well hello. You're new aren't you? What's his name? Shadow, huh? And Freddie." He continued to pet them and then commanded "Sit." And they obeyed perfectly. "We've adopted the village mutt, Buddy. He has a house at the back entrance away from bad weather."

Chris watched and mentally celebrated for his friend. He had always felt that a house needed children and at least one dog to be complete. What Martin had missed because of his aversion to dogs!

Martin continued "Now, for the suggestions: I was made Chief of Surgery at the youngest age of anyone ever in all the London hospitals and supervised twelve to fifteen registrars. I performed over ten thousand surgeries without incident or failure. My papers have been published all over the world. I was consistently top of all the classes we took in med school and was the top surgeon before I was made Chief." He paused and looked at his shoes for a moment. "I'm uncomfortable saying these things. You already know all about me as does the board. The only person I don't know personally is Dr. Black. Tell them I could start by observing operations before I would actually do surgery. And, of course, support the other departments as I did when I was still in training for surgery. I'll do anything necessary to prove myself. Are all the things I said enough for you to talk to them? Chris, I'm absolutely confident about this and want to be a surgeon again. "

Chris looked at his friend and had complete faith in him. "Yes, it's enough. We have a board meeting a week from now. I'll send out an email informing the members that I want them to discuss this and I'll see if Dr. Black can attend. Good enough?"

Relieved, Martin just nodded. He wished he could express his emotions and tell Chris he was grateful that he believed in him and even more grateful that they were friends. He couldn't say what he felt so he offered his hand instead. They went back to the lounge to join their wives. Carol held James Henry while she and Louisa made plans to spend a day shopping in Truro.

Chris and Carol had always hoped that Martin would start playing the piano again. He had loved music and played beautifully. He never told them why he stopped but they felt that it had something to do with his first girl friend, Edith. Neither of them liked her. She was narcissistic and used Martin to get ahead. She would coax him into 'helping' to write her papers and made sure they were paired on any team projects and never failed to take the credit for their successes. She convinced him that they had many things in common besides medicine like music, lectures on Buddhism and the archeology of Great Britain, the study of art and cooking. As far as her claim of loving music, they were sure it was a load of tosh. The three of them spent free time playing together. Chris the cello, Carol the violin and Martin the piano. She couldn't hide her boredom from them when they played together in the flat that Martin and Chris shared but he didn't see it. He thought they were desperately in love and asked her to marry him. She laughed at him and informed him that her career was paramount with her and she couldn't waste any more time on a boy like him who mooned over her and forced her to do all the boring things that he was interested in. And his pathetic efforts playing the piano were the worst! Oh, she was glad that she was of help to him with his studies but she had a chance to go to Canada for an unbelievable opportunity so he was on his own. Martin never spoke of it, just withdrew from everything except his studies. Chris and Carol waited in vain for him to confide in them. He never touched a piano again and dismissed it as a childish pursuit. Thank goodness the women in the hospital wouldn't let him ignore them! He eventually took what was offered and his reputation grew as an expert and generous lover. Chris and Carol still played and had formed a small group that met weekly and were often invited to play at local events. They had a lovely baby grand in the lounge and continued to hope that Martin would be tempted to play it someday.

James Henry saw his father and, as usual, made happy baby noises, kicked his feet and waived his arms and grinned. Martin touched two fingers to his forehead and picked him up. James wiggled in delight. The piano was behind him so Martin sat on the closest seat which was the piano bench. Carol very casually asked "Louisa, do you think you'll find a piano teacher for James? I know new parents have all sorts of plans and half never happen but I feel that music is so important for a child's full development. Some of my pupils take music lessons and I find that they gain so much confidence in themselves when they're learning to play an instrument."

Louisa answered eagerly "Yes! I never had the opportunity to learn to play any instrument and have always regretted it. I wish one of us played the piano although we would have to find a place for it somewhere in the surgery. I definitely want that for James. How about you, Martin?"

Martin looked down at his son's face before he answered. James had dozed off, held closely and securely in his father's arms. "Yes, I do. I always found music to be very soothing and loved playing." He turned around to face the piano and opened the lid. "It's been a long time since I touched a piano. I'm not sure I remember…"

Louisa stood and took James from him. Martin softly played some chords. They could just make out what he was playing. Carol whispered to Louisa that it was Martin's favorite piece: Bizet's opera - Les Pecheurs de perles. He continued to play and seemed oblivious to everything around him. Louisa made a silent vow: there would be a piano in their home even if they had to put the sofa in storage! His concentration was broken when James Henry sneezed. He started and looked around the room. "I apologize. We were talking and I interrupted you, Louisa."

Carol stood behind him and, with her hands on his shoulders, kissed his cheek. "Don't apologize, Martin. That was lovely. I'll get my violin, Chris can get his cello and we'll play together, please?"

He touched the hand on his right shoulder to silently acknowledgment her request and stood up. "Not tonight. Louisa, don't you think it's time for us to go home? James needs to go to bed."