I'm Marc Pardo, Do I Know You? Chapter 38 Just Desserts, a janet evanovich fanfic

Chapter 38—Just Desserts

I think that passion and love and pain are all bearable,

and they go to make love beautiful.

It was late afternoon by the time Marc pulled off the Interstate and took a side road northeast toward Lake Erie. The countryside was sparsely populated until they came upon a little town called Vermilion-On-The-Lake. Driving through town, they approached a large rustic lodge with Lake Erie as its backdrop.

Marc pulled up to the lodge's front entryway and stopped the car. He swiftly exited and came around to Steph's side and opened her door. Holding out his hand, he helped her out and grabbed their luggage, then led her into the lodge.

He asked the young girl behind the reception desk for their best room and, after much giggling and fluttering of eyelashes, she booked them into the Presidential Suite. Climbing the widely spaced stairs to the top, Marc and Steph realized their room was the only one on that floor. Their lodging for the night turned out to be a magnificent set of rooms decorated in deep blues and greens. The décor complemented the stunning views of the lake and surrounding woods that could be seen through the double bay windows of the sitting area. There was a big stone fireplace set in the wall between the living room and the bedroom. Decorative andirons were artfully arranged with logs and kindling and required just a match to light a blazing fire.

Marc carried their bags into the next room and deposited them on the padded bench at the end of the bed. The spacious bedroom was tastefully appointed with dark wood furniture and continued the blue and green theme in its bed linens and draperies, but there was no avoiding the massive four-poster bed that dominated the room.

Steph stepped through the French doors into the bedroom and her eyes grew big as she took in the king-sized bed. This was really going to happen. After all she'd been through this past year, after all the ups and downs, she and Ranger… well, she and Marc… were finally going to be together. Their second time together, or was it actually their first, since Marc didn't remember their first time?

She sat on the edge of the bed and held out her hand to Marc, feeling the need for a closer connection. They'd revealed so much to each other earlier that her head was spinning a little. She knew they still had many things to discuss. Ranger had always been so closed off and there was so much she didn't know about him, that dealing with Marc's openness and his requests for such personal information about himself was difficult. But the fact that he wanted her close to him, physically and emotionally, was such a welcome relief, she knew she would endure any amount of discomfort she felt about opening up about herself.

Marc moved to stand in front of her and pulled her up against him. "Is the room satisfactory?"

"Are you kidding? It's gorgeous," Steph said, and then looked coyly up at him through her lashes, "And the bed's quite comfortable."

"Good to know." Marc planted a quick kiss on Steph's lips and then reached for her hand. "Let's take a walk so we can stretch our legs and then grab some dinner," he said.

"What? Need some liquid courage before…" Steph glanced at the bed and grinned, in her own inimitable way testing Marc.

In an instant she was flat on her back and being pressed into the soft mattress by the very hard body of a great smelling Marc Pardo. The dark intense look in his eyes sent a thrill through her, but it was a different, hungrier look than the one she was accustomed to seeing in Ranger's eyes. She began to have second thoughts.

"Wait… I'm a little hungry…" Steph stammered, as she felt his warm lips plant a trail of kisses from the back of her ear, down her neck to her décolletage. His lips turned up into a smile against her bare skin as she wavered.

"So am I," Marc uttered as his lips worked their way slowly southward.

Beginning to hyperventilate, Steph squirmed under Marc's body, but that just elicited a groan from him as her hips rolled under him. "Maybe we're rushing things?" she squeaked.

"Stephanie, you do realize how long I've waited for this?"

"Just as long as I have," was her reply. "But… I do better on a full stomach."

His southward migration stopped and he dropped his forehead lightly on her ribs. Then, as quickly as it started, it stopped. He raised his head and saw her wide open eyes. Now was not the right time.

He rose to his feet and pulled her up against him. "Walk first, then food, and then… you and me… in this bed. And I have to warn you, I give great… bed." Two could play at the teasing game.

"Pretty sure of yourself for an amnesiac," Steph quipped, unable to resist pulling the tiger's tail, figuratively speaking.

"I am so going to make you eat those words," Marc challenged, following that with, "among other things."

Another thrill ran down Steph's spine. She tucked her head into his chest to hide her flushed cheeks and then dashed into the bathroom.

A few minutes later, they were strolling hand in hand down the path from the lodge to the lake. They walked along the beach watching the late afternoon sun's rays light up the lake and the waves gently lap onto the sandy shore. It was a peaceful setting and no one else was enjoying the balmy evening down by the lake. They had the tranquil scene all to themselves.

"You may be right," Marc said, out of the blue.

"Huh?" Real swift comeback there, Steph, focus.

"About rushing things." Marc glanced sideways at her, trying to gauge her mood.

She realized what he was referring to and quickly countered, "No! No, that was just a momentary panic and I am starving. I'll be better after I get some food in my stomach. And dessert. I could really go for some dessert." She smiled to herself. "You probably don't remember, but you love dessert, too. The sweeter, the better."

"Right," he said, shaking his head. "Nice try, mejillas dulces."

"What did you just call me?" she asked, scrunching her forehead up.

"Sweet cheeks." He leaned over and gave her a noisy kiss on each of her cheeks. "Okay. Dinner with dessert it is then."

He stopped walking and pulled her back up against his chest, spoon fashion. They were facing west so they could watch the sunset. From one of the nearby cottages they could hear the strains of music filtering down to the lake. It was a familiar song and Marc began humming along with it as he nuzzled Steph's neck.

I know just how to whisper

And I know just how to cry

I know just where to find the answers

And I know just how to lie

I know just how to fake it

And I know just how to scheme

I know just when to face the truth

And then I know just when to dream

"Are you going to serenade me again?" she asked, her voice low and sexy.

"Not tonight. Did Ranger ever serenade you?" He stopped nuzzling to listen to her response.

She shook her head and then tilted it, exposing more of her neck, subtly inviting his sensual advances. He didn't hesitate to take her up on her 'offer.'

And I know just where to touch you

And I know just what to prove

I know when to pull you closer

And I know when to let you loose

Marc's hands had been on her hips and he slid them across her stomach, pulling her closer. She folded her hands on top of his. They began to sway a little to the music. The lyrics could just barely be discerned.

And I know the night is fading

And I know the time's gonna fly

And I'm never gonna tell you

Everything I gotta tell you

But I know I gotta give it a try

Marc didn't change position, but he started to speak, his breath hot on her neck. "I'll understand if you want to wait awhile. You were expecting to get Ranger back, and you got me." Steph froze, a confused look crossing her face.

And I know the roads to riches

And I know the ways to fame

I know all the rules

And I know how to break 'em

And I always know the name of the game

"I don't understand. You're still you, you're still the man I love. It's me that's the stranger to you," she responded.

But I don't know how to leave you

And I'll never let you fall

And I don't know how you do it

Making love out of nothing at all

He stopped swaying and assured her, "Steph, the way I feel about you now, as Marc Pardo, convinces me that I will always love you, but you fell in love with Ranger Mañoso, not me. You don't really know me. And as the song says, how do you make love out of nothing at all. Maybe we should take things slow and get to know one another as we are now."

The sun's rays were almost gone, but one shaft of light hit them and the auburn highlights in Steph's mass of curls lit up like a burning ember. He buried his nose in her hair inhaling her scent. Dios, how he wanted her!

Every time I see you all the rays of the sun

Are streaming through the waves in your hair

And every star in the sky is taking aim at your eyes

Like a spotlight

His heart was pounding as he thought about what he was saying to her and the way it could very well backfire on him. The thought of losing this 'tesoro brillante' he just found, this 'shining treasure' he held in his arms, sent a cold chill through him.

The beating of my heart is a drum and it's lost

And it's looking for a rhythm like you

You can take the darkness from the pit of the night

And turn into a beacon burning endlessly bright

Not quite understanding what he was saying, Steph pulled away from him. Then she spun around and looked him in the eyes. "That's what you think I'm doing? Making love out of nothing?" Her hands flew up and down and up again as she spoke.

Her voice was getting louder. "What about our connection? What about the feeling I get every time I see you, every time I hear your voice, every time you touch me? I know there's some part of you that remembers me. You called out to me that day, when you were falling… I heard you. That was Ranger calling to me… that was you!" She stood before him, arms slowly dropping to her side, her chest heaving with emotion.

Marc narrowed his brows in concentration, trying to remember that pivotal moment when he thought he was going to die and then saw Stephanie for the first time. "I don't remember saying your name. I didn't know your name then."

"It wasn't my name you cried, it was…" Steph shook her head and looked away.

Marc lightly grasped her upper arms. "What? What was it?"

She looked down at their feet sunk into the sand and shook her head again. She so desperately wanted him to say it, for him to remember. It wouldn't be the same if he only said it because she expected it, wanted it, no… she needed to hear him call her that again.

His hands were still on her arms and he gently rubbed them up and down. He could feel their mutual pull towards each other; there was no denying they had a connection. But there was still so much they didn't know about one another. And he didn't want Stephanie to expect him to be the man she fell in love with and then be disappointed.

"I've learned a little about the man I used to be and he was impressive. But I'm not that man, not anymore. And, I may never be him again. It's been a year since the explosion and I haven't regained any of my memories."

His hands stilled and she could feel his grip on her arms tighten. "I don't know what I'm going back to in Trenton, or what I have to offer you…" he paused until their eyes met, "But know this, whoever I am, whatever I have, I offer it to you, Querida."

I've gotta follow it 'cause everything I know

Well it's nothing till I give it to you

Steph felt a lump forming in her throat. She'd waited years for him to say that to her, to offer some sort of commitment and here he was, doing just that. Steph reached up and placed both her hands on the sides of his face. Her eyes were filling with tears and her heart was filling with so much emotion it almost hurt.

"That's more than Ranger ever offered me, until that last day, and you offer it now, not really knowing me at all." She blinked hard squeezing the tears out so she could see his brown eyes clearly. "I accept."

Steph rose up on the balls of her feet and leaned toward Marc. He met her halfway, their mouths crashing into one another, their arms encircling each other. The kiss went on and on, as their tongues touched, searched, explored. Their hands were doing the same with their bodies, as if they were touching each other for the first time – which in some ways, they were.

I can make the runner stumble

I can make the final block

And I can make every tackle at the sound of the whistle

I can make all the stadiums rock

I can make tonight forever

Or I can make it disappear by the dawn

I can make you every promise that has ever been made

I can make all your demons be gone

But I'm never gonna make it without you

Do you really want to see me crawl

And I'm never gonna make it like you do

Making love out of nothing at all

The final chorus of the song was winding down, the sun had set and darkness was upon them. And still they were locked in a firm embrace, savoring an endless kiss.

Making love, Out of nothing at all

Even breaking apart took forever. They went from kissing to embracing, cheek to cheek. When they pulled a little ways apart, they touched foreheads and breathed in each other's breath. As they finally made their way up the beach to the walkway, Marc's arm was around Steph's shoulders and her arm was tightly clasped around his waist, her head tucked against his shoulder. There were overhead lights above the walkway and spaced at regular intervals were a long row of beach cottages.

Finally, Steph spoke, "Marc, I know you say you don't remember anything from your past, but if you remember me even a little, doesn't it mean everything's still in there, just blocked somehow? There must be a specialist that studies these things. A doctor you can consult with? Or are you saying you don't want to get your memories back?"

He didn't say anything for several hundred yards as they continued strolling. It was the first time she'd seen him hesitate. When he did speak, what he said surprised her. "I've lived so long now without knowing who I was, that I think of the person I used to be as a stranger. I have to admit, on some level it feels like I'd be killing me if, all of a sudden, I could remember myself as Ranger. And Steph, I have to be honest. There are some things about Ranger Mañoso that I don't know if I like."

Steph's eyes got big and her hand tightened its grip around his waist. "Like what?" she asked.

Marc rubbed his hand along his jaw, feeling the stubble rough against his palm. "He's not close to anyone. By your own words, he kept you at a distance and even discarded you by telling you to go back to Joe. He doesn't seem to be close to his family. And his daughter! He stepped up financially, but he doesn't even know his own flesh and blood. Maybe it's because I've felt lost and have been searching for so long, but I don't want to live like that, isolated and alone." The vehemence in his voice was palpable.

"But that isn't all there is to you, to Ranger. He… you are fiercely loyal to your friends and family. You've come to my rescue so many times, and I don't just mean saving me from my stupid blunders, though you have moved heaven and earth to save my life more than once. You've been there for me when I needed a shoulder to cry on, when I needed a car, a job, a place to stay." Trying to lighten the mood, she joked, "You even braved eating dinner with my family. Now, that's a true friend."

He listened intently to her recite his 'good' deeds and knew she wouldn't have fallen in love with a bad man, but there were other reasons for his reluctance. "A man that closed off must have some deep dark secret he is trying to hide or bury… painful or shameful things. Do I want to remember that? I've read about all the horrendous missions I went on and, I could read between the lines. I must have seen and done things no one would want to remember. Maybe it's a blessing I lost my memory?"

"I don't believe that. I know there were things you had to do as an Army Ranger and as a government agent that were awful, but you did them to protect us, to protect America. I'm proud of you for all that you did. I know you carried a lot on your shoulders, but each of those missions shaped the man you are, the man I came to respect and to love."

"That was the man I was," Marc spat out. "I told you, I'm not him any more."

"It isn't that black and white, Marc. It doesn't have to be one way or the other— one person or the other. You're still you. Ranger is still within you. I see it in so many ways. Taking control and getting off the plane so we could have more time together is a classic Ranger move. The rental car, the Porsche? That is exactly the car Ranger would have picked right down to the color. But even if you got your memory back, it would be tempered by all you've experienced and felt over the last year. You wouldn't lose you, the man you've become. People grow, they evolve. This is no different."

"What about us?" His voice got lower and slower the more her impassioned voice rose.

"We will grow and evolve, too. With each other. I see changes in you, but… they are changes I like. I want to get to know you, as you are now and as you will be in the future, whatever the future holds, memory or no memory. And… I don't want to take things slow."

Marc stared at Stephanie just for a moment before he pulled her to him, his head lowering until their lips met. With a slight shifting, their bodies moved into alignment with each other until there wasn't any space left between them. They couldn't get enough of each other, kissing and caressing until their passion threatened to overwhelm them. The moon had risen and traveled quite a distance before they finally broke apart.

With the sun gone, the temperature had dropped considerably and a cold breeze was blowing off the lake. Neither of the lovers were dressed for the chillier weather. Without Marc's arms around her, Steph no longer shared his body heat. She shivered and then her stomach rumbled not once but twice. As much as he wanted to continue kissing his woman, Marc took a deep breath and said, "We need to get you indoors and get some food in that empty belly of yours."

They stopped for dinner at a small burger joint they passed on their way back to the lodge. Marc wanted to hold out for something with a more varied menu, but Steph had been smelling the aroma of burgers and French fries as they walked and her stomach was complaining loudly.

He'd never seen anyone enjoy their food more than Stephanie. Her moans and groans were nearly orgasmic. Marc couldn't wait to get her back to their room, but his plans were put on temporary hold. For dessert, she ordered a chocolate milkshake, and then just before they left, she ordered a fried Snickers bar to go.

He had no idea how she could eat like that and still be so trim. She'd confided to him earlier she hated to exercise. At least there was one form of exercise they could share that very night. He had no doubt tonight was going to be one he would never forget and he'd make sure it was one Stephanie would want to repeat over and over again. He couldn't believe they'd only made love once before. That was another thing he didn't like about his past life. He intended to change that, starting tonight. Putting his arm around her shoulders to keep her warm, he picked up the pace as they neared the lodge.

Marc unlocked the door to their room and entered first, moving swiftly through the rooms before returning to Stephanie. He locked the door behind them, but not before hanging the 'Do Not Disturb' sign on the outside doorknob.

As Marc started the fire in the fireplace, Steph saw a decanted bottle of wine on the counter of the wet bar. Two wine glasses were lined up next to it along with a silver tray containing a dozen chocolate covered strawberries drizzled with white icing. Another Ranger move. She glanced down at the little white bag holding her fried Snickers bar and then looked back at the strawberries. She was unconsciously chewing on her lower lip.

Marc was suddenly standing behind her, his arms snaking around her waist and his head perched on her shoulder. "You can have both, you don't have to choose."

"I can't choose. I want both of you," she cried and spun, flinging her arms around his neck, as if holding on for dear life.

"I take it we're not talking about sweets," he said softly. He picked her up and settled them both on the couch near the crackling fireplace. Holding her on his lap, he rubbed small circles along the small of her back as she cried into his shoulder.

"Querida, getting my memories back won't change anything. I'll love you either way, nothing is going to change that. And weren't you the one who just told me that whatever happens, we'll grow and evolve together?"

Steph sniffled and wiped her wet cheeks and runny nose on the back of her sleeve. She croaked hoarsely, "I'm a mess. My mind is bouncing all over the place. Are you sure you can still love a mixed up, screwed up, blubbering fool like me?"

"Sí, te amo," he whispered, continuing to stroke her back. "From where I sit, you're no fool. You're a successful, and beautiful, Federal agent who always gets her man and solves the case. And you are a fiercely loyal friend, to quote someone I respect. I couldn't be prouder of you, Querida. I think we both are feeling a little uneasy about the future. Everything I've heard and read about my 'earlier' self is that he was perceived as larger than life. I get the impression he cultivated that image on purpose. I guess living the kind of dangerous, even violent life he did made such a reputation necessary."

Steph nodded. "Ranger was definitely a badass and everyone knew it. And it was not just a bluff; he could back up his words with instant action. It is one of the reasons he was so successful. No one wanted to cross him."

"Steph, I have to be honest. If I don't regain my memory, I don't know if I can live that same kind of life, if I want to live like that."

"Well, your government contract is over, so you don't have to do that anymore. It might mean you'd have a lot to learn about running RangeMan, but Tank can help you with that. Marc, that company is your baby. You put everything into it. You…Ranger ran a tight ship and you were in control of every aspect. Your employees respond well to your strong leadership. Anything less may not sit well with them."

The fire crackled and popped as they both sat on the couch, holding one another. Minutes went by and neither spoke, content to be in each other's arms. But their minds were hashing and rehashing the events and conversations of the day.

Finally, Marc spoke up, "I've given a lot of thought to this, and as soon as we get back to Trenton, I'd like to see a specialist. Someone who can tell me if there's any possibility of getting my memory back. I don't know if we're talking surgery or therapy or… acupuncture, but I have to give it my best effort."

"Alright. That way we'll know, one way or the other." She moved her head until her ear was directly over his heart and the steady beat soothed her.

He continued, "Now that my name has been officially cleared and I don't have to worry about foreign agents trying to kill me, I need to see about 'coming back from the dead.' Since my employees know me as Ranger Mañoso, I want to keep it that way, but you… I would like it if you would call me Carlos."

Stephanie raised her head and studied his face. He was beautiful. She stroked his brow and then his cheek. He had strong cheekbones, a straight nose and full lips. His eyes and his smile were his best features, though all of him was near perfect. Running her fingers through his hair, she realized she missed the longer length, a little.

"Carlos…" she said, as if trying it on for size. "It seems so personal. So intimate. I like it. Carlos it is, then." She leaned in and kissed his full lips lightly and leaned back again.

"Querida, as long as you're by my side, I can handle any outcome. I know I'll land on my feet, whatever comes. Are you with me?"

For an answer, Steph put her arms around his neck and kissed him with all the love and passion she felt in her heart and soul.

Wine and strawberries forgotten, Carlos stood up with Stephanie in his arms and strode into the bedroom.

AN: Song is 'Making Love Out Of Nothing At All' by Air Supply. And yes, Steph eventually got to eat her dessert. And so did Carlos.