I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
It's 2 a.m. and I'm cursing your name
I'm so in love that I acted insane
And that's the way I loved you
It's a roller coaster kind of rush
I never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you
That's the way I loved you – Taylor Swift
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HUGE thank you to Rain-It-Shall for beta-ing!
Also, thank you to everyone who has pimped this story, added me as a fav author, fav story, and put me on your alerts. I'm stunned and amazed that my little crossover story that could has done this well, and you all mean the world to me.
And a HUGE thank you to everyone who has reviewed! I tried to respond to all of you, but I know was being wonky there for awhile and if you couldn't review, I apologize – I appreciate the effort : )
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After leaving Renesmee at home with the rest of her family, Jacob still felt uneasy. It all seemed too good to be true really – she knew about the imprint, and from what he could tell, she was actually happy about it. She had seemed a little upset that he hadn't told her the truth all these years, but he would at least be able to bring up his agreement with Edward.
Oh, don't drag Edward into this, Seth whined.
Jacob swore at him in his mind, annoyed at his pack mate for choosing Edward's side so quickly. You would take his side, wouldn't you, Seth? He thought.
Seth shrugged and kept his nose to the ground. They weren't having much luck tracking Damon, and any hopes of finding him and 'taking care of it' as Jacob referred to it, were pretty much gone. He knew that Stefan didn't want them to kill his only brother, but if it was up to Jacob, he would hunt him down and tear him limb from limb, no questions asked. Anything that threatened Nessie was something he took personally.
God damn it, I wanted to get to him before he had a chance to go to those Italian bloodsuckers! Jacob fumed.
I was too, man. I had a feeling we weren't going to catch him.
Why? Jacob huffed. They had split up their efforts, with Jacob and Seth pairing up to scour the mountainside closest to the Denali home. He hopped up onto a tall rock, scanning the scenery for anything that looked out of place. So far, nothing.
This reminds me of that Victoria chick from way back. Remember her? It was like she knew where we were going to be before we got there. And then she just ran…and taunted us…god she was awful, Seth grumbled. He looked up at Jacob on the boulder and twitched his tail in an annoyed fashion.
Jacob fumed inwardly, annoyed to have Victoria brought up. It reminded him of a time in his life that he had tried so incredibly hard to forget. Remembering the childish way he fought for Bella's affections made him sick now. He couldn't help but hope that any more questions Nessie would have about his sick fascination with her mother so long ago would be directed at Bella, not him.
She wasn't even alive yet, Jake. You can't blame yourself. You had no idea, Seth reasoned with him as they patrolled.
That doesn't' make it go away, Seth.
I know, but…you shouldn't blame yourself for it. It was so long ago…you were in a different place then.
I realize that, but that doesn't make it any less twisted.
I'm sure you just liked Bella so much because subconsciously you knew that she would give you Nessie someday.
That's pretty sick.
No one said imprinting was pretty.
Yeah well…I loved Bells cuz she was Bells. That's all there was too it. I mistook friendship love for real love, Jacob said. In his mind, he remembered the feelings he had towards Bella, then multiplied them times a million to show Seth what he felt for his imprint.
See? Nothing to worry about. Just explain that to her…
Did someone make you the pack's voice of reason while I was gone? Cuz you sure love to dish out advice. Unsolicited.
I'm just trying to help.
Sorry Seth. I just want to find this stupid leech and end him. If we find him today…it's over. You've got my back, right?
Always, Seth replied. The two wolves ran side by side for several miles, their noses to the ground and eyes scanning the scenery around them.
He's not out there. He's already gone, I can tell.
How do you know?
I can just feel it. He wouldn't make this easy for us. I knew he wouldn't, Jacob said.
Figures. Well, what should we do? Seth asked.
I don't know…I just want to go home and see Ness. That stupid leech had better stay away from her…she's picked me, she made her choice…
Stefan?
Yeah. I dunno, I still feel like…what if she does still have feelings for him? They were pretty close when I was at school…I'm afraid…
Don't be, Jake. She's your girl now, and everything will be alright.
You're awfully optimistic.
Aren't I always?
My luck is just never that good.
Then don't be a dumbass and screw it up.
Me? Screw something up? Never, he laughed.
Well, I'm just saying, you have a tendency to screw up a good thing. Just relax and let things happen naturally.
You know a lot about imprinting for a pup, Jacob teased.
Shut up, Jake, I'm not a pup anymore. I'm almost as old as you. Now listen. If you go back there and act all jealous and crap like you ALWAYS do, you'll just chase her away again. Don't be a jackass, Jake. Don't screw this up again.
Seth, it's a lot easier to criticize from the outside, you know?
Seth thought a moment. I guess, but…the great ones never have it easy.
The great ones, what?
Romances. Romeo and Juliet, Tristan and Isolde…even The Little Mermaid-
Seth!
Okay, okay, that one was a stretch. Sorry. But…none of them had it particularly easy. But if it was easy, would they have gotten books written for them? Or Disney movies?
I hate you.
Whatever. You know I'm right. The great ones never have it easy, Jake. If they did then…they wouldn't really be that great.
Jacob had to hand it to Seth – he knew his younger pack mate was right.
Don't give up now, Jake. You can be your own worst enemy sometimes is all I'm saying.
I guess you're right, Jacob mumbled, turning to trot down the mountainside. Seth ambled behind him, still sniffing around.
Just take it easy. She chose you, just like you wanted. And you're right…she was close with Stefan, so it's not going to be easy for her to just let him go, especially with him hanging around all the time. But have a little faith in her that she'll do the right thing.
You're right Seth. As much as I HATE to admit it, you're definitely right.
I know, right? Seth laughed. Jacob swiped at him with his paw, and Seth ducked out of the way quickly with a laugh.
I sure hope you're right, Seth…
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Renesmee stood in the doorway, her jaw hanging open. There, in front of her, were two women that were Nahuel's sisters. They had human eyes, beating hearts, yet their slightly bronzed skin still shone in the afternoon sunlight. One of them was much more than the other.
"Renesmee?" Nahuel prompted, looking at her strangely. She blinked quickly, trying to clear her mind and remember her manners, but she was in so much shock she could barely speak. It was one thing to hear stories about Nahuel's sisters, but it was quite another to meet two of them face to face.
They're just like me, she thought in awe.
"Please, welcome…come in!" Alice finally chirped, edging Renesmee out of the way. Renesmee laughed, giving her aunt a 'really?' look, but moved to the side so that the three of them could come inside the Denali home.
"It's really good to see you. I'm glad you guys were able to come! How fortunate that you were around!" Alice said excitedly, eying the two strangers. "I caught a vision of them running around in…where were you? Somewhere warm…"
"I believe we were somewhere in Montana when you called," he replied.
Alice giggled, her tinkling laughter echoing in the large entryway of the Denali home. "Yes, well...I was just lucky you had that phone on you! I called him as soon as I could to get him up here."
Nahuel laughed, flashing his bright, white teeth. His tan skin glowed, even through his 'human' clothes. Nahuel usually donned the least amount of clothing Renesmee had ever seen on a human, but now he wore jeans, a black t-shirt, and a zip up sweatshirt over that. His sisters each had on jeans, but their shirts were too big and dirty looking. All three of them were barefoot, standing in the foyer of the room.
"We uh…had to dress in whatever we could find along the way," he said softly, following her eyes. Alice stepped forward, beaming. Renesmee still stood shocked in doorway, staring openly at the two women in front of her. She was absolutely fascinated. She had never in her life imagined that she would actually have a chance to see Nahuel's sisters, even though he had spoken of them on many of his visits. He described them as lofty, hard to find, and distant creatures who rarely trusted anyone. To have them standing in front of her now amazed her completely.
"We'd be happy to help you any way we can. I'm just so glad you're all here! Now can we meet your sisters, Nahuel?"
Nahuel smiled at Alice's forwardness, grinning ear to ear. "Yes, Alice," he laughed. "This," he said, motioning to the first woman, "Is Isadora. She is from Chile, and we found each other not long after I returned home from Forks the first time," he said.
Isadora stepped forward giving them a small wave. She was small, about Bella's size, with wild, curly, light brown hair that hung in tiny ringlets all around her face. They shone with pretty golden blonde highlights from time spent in the sun, and although she had pale skin, it was somehow subtly bronzed, unlike Renesmee's pale white skin. She had soft brown eyes, almost like her own, that were set in her round, perfect face.
"Hello," she said, giving them an awkward smile. Nahuel beamed at her reassuringly, and she stepped back to let her other sister be welcomed.
Renesmee had gotten several short visits from Nahuel over the years, and was relieved to see that each time she saw him he was a much happier person than the time before. It had taken awhile, but he had slowly recovered from his long depression.
"And this is my newest sister…I've just found her six weeks ago. This is Estrella," he said.
He motioned her forward, and the tall, almost gangly looking girl stepped closer. She appeared to be about seventeen or eighteen, while Isadora looked somewhat older, possibly in her twenties.
Estrella must not be full grown, Renesmee thought.
Estrella stood tall, probably around 5'10, with long arms and legs that reminded Renesmee of a gazelle. Her light brown hair was almost the same color as Isadora's, only hers was bleached blonde from the sun in the front near her face, and hung halfway down her back. She had a funny shaped but cute little nose, full, wide lips, and a pair of the most beautiful sea-green eyes Renesmee had ever seen. They were absolutely piercing.
"Hi," Renesmee said, holding out a hand to her. The girl looked utterly confused and lost, standing there, her eyes darting around the room. Estrella looked down at Renesmee's hand blankly, her eyes moving back up to meet hers.
Estrella gave her a weak smile, but did nothing.
"Okay," Renesmee mumbled, putting her hand down. Nahuel chuckled quietly, patting Renesmee on the elbow.
"Forgive Estrella. She grew up in a rural village in southern Brazil…she doesn't speak English yet, dear Renesmee," he assured her, his own accent somewhat heavy.
"Oh, I'm sorry!" Renesmee replied out of habit. The exotic looking half vampire just looked back at her with a lost expression.
She looks like a foreign model, Renesmee thought wistfully. This girl was maybe even prettier than Rosalie – and that was truly beautiful.
"Can we teach her?" Alice asked excitedly, clasping her hands together. Renesmee smiled to herself as she was sure Alice was ecstatic to have a chance at a fresh slate when it came to someone.
"She knows only one word," Nahuel replied. "Blood."
At the mention of the word, Estrella's eyes lit up and she grinned. "Blood," she repeated, her accent thick and foreign sounding. Alice giggled, and Renesmee joined her.
"Can you teach her...Engl-ish?" Isadora spoke up. "Mine is bad t-to," she finished shakily. Alice rushed forward, grabbing both Isadora and Estrella's hands.
"We'll teach you!" she assured them both with an infectious smile. Alice rattled off something in a language that sounded like Spanish, but was more guttural and had more syllables; Renesmee guessed a version of Portuguese. Isadora gave her a shy nod, but Estrella beamed proudly, her white teeth sparkling.
Renesmee spent the next few hours getting caught up with her friend Nahuel, while Estrella and Isadora were introduced to some human food by Alice in the kitchen.
Estrella shook her head violently after tasting some cheese. "No. Blood," she insisted firmly, crossing her long arms over her chest. She frowned for a second, but her face broke into a smile that quickly spread over her entire face. She laughed at herself, looking at her sister Isadora who was eating an orange next to her.
Renesmee was only half listening to Nahuel as he spoke of life in the deep, South American jungle. She was just so fascinated to meet two other women that were exactly like her. Did they have the same fears as she did? Did they feel like they didn't belong anywhere as well? Did they often feel like freaks?
Alice caught her eye and smiled, and Renesmee mimicked the gesture. Alice always knew how to help.
"So you like my sisters?" Nahuel joked, elbowing her where she sat at the kitchen table. Renesmee giggled, nodding.
"I do. I wish Jacob was here. I want him to meet them because we've spent my whole life just thinking I was this freak…"
"I'm sure your Jacob did not think you were a freak," Nahuel reminded her gently. Renesmee gave him a crooked smile.
"Well, no, I guess he didn't. But I always did, Nahuel. You know how it is to be like us – we don't fit anywhere."
Nahuel watched her with his expressive eyes, taking in her forlorn expression and sad smile. "This has really been bothering you, hasn't it?" he asked.
She nodded, looking over at Estrella who was sniffing at some cereal Alice was offering her.
"They're both really beautiful," she told him quietly. He looked at his two half-sisters, nodding eagerly.
"They are. But…their lives haven't been fair. Isadora had it a little easier, growing up with her aunt…but she had to learn early on what she was and what she could and couldn't do. She's had a very hard life. But Estrella…I just…I shudder to think…"
"What happened to her?" Renesmee asked, her interest piqued. She felt bad talking about the poor girl when she was standing right there, but couldn't resist- she knew Estrella couldn't understand what they were talking about anyway.
"Well, I've been on the hunt for my father for years," he began. "Well, I found Estrella six weeks ago when I was traveling up through Brazil. I'm not certain that she's my sister for sure, but the facts are all there. She thinks she's about eight-years-old, but she cannot be certain…she's spent most of her life alone."
"Alone?" Renesmee asked her eyes wide.
"Yes. She lived in a tiny jungle village far, far, away from any civilization, and her people were afraid of her from the start. They called her the devil child for growing so fast and for killing her mother. She tried for years to live as a normal human girl, but didn't understand her thirst. She isn't venomous either, so when she did bite people she didn't kill them. However…that still didn't make her very popular."
"What did she do after that?"
"She thinks when she was about four she moved into the jungle outside of the village. They all knew something wasn't right with her, but she is a smart girl and knew to hide her speed and talents…but…her skin…"
"She shimmers like me?"
Nahuel shook his head. "Sadly, no. She sparkles almost as much as a real vampire. She cannot be in the sunlight around humans."
Renesmee looked over at the tall girl, instantly saddened for her. "Oh, that's so sad…"
"Yes, well…she survived most of her life on jungle fruit and things like that until I taught her how to hunt animals. How she never attacked an animal in wild thirst is beyond me. She likes it, and she doesn't feel scared that she's going to be tempted anymore. Estrella is a great person, inside and out."
"Is she gifted like me?" Renesmee asked hopefully. Nahuel laughed, patting her hand.
"No, Renesmee, only you are the gifted half breed. We are just normal hybrids."
She snorted at him, crossing her arms. "That's a bit of an oxymoron, isn't it?"
Nahuel was about to answer her when the search party that was out hunting for Damon returned through the back doors, Edward leading the way, followed by an irritated Emmett, Garrett, and Jasper.
"Nothing?" Alice asked, flitting to Jasper's side. He shook his head silently as the rest of the family came from their places around the house to welcome everyone home from their depressing search.
Renesmee looked down at her lap as the rest of her vampire family began to congregate in the great room. Looking at the snow and mud spattered on their clothes, a nearly paralyzing wave of guilt washed over her. She knew they had been out looking for Damon, and it was all because of her that they had been out searching in the bleak Alaskan wilderness.
Renesmee hugged her parents tightly, looking up at them as they embraced her. "I'm so sorry. This is all my fault," she added, looking at everyone once they were all gathered in the great room.
Edward touched her cheek, giving her a weak smile. "We'll fix this, Renesmee."
She nodded, her cheeks burning as she felt the eyes of her family on her. "Yes, but it was my silly behavior and mistakes that led us here in the first place. Can you ever forgive me?" she asked, looking around the room with hopeful eyes.
Everyone nodded sadly in silent agreement, and she felt a little better. "I'm so sorry for what I've put everyone through these past few weeks. I know…things are bad, and they're all my fault."
"That's very mature of you, Renesmee," Edward said. "But you are right – your behavior did start much of this. I'm glad you've learned from your experience though."
She nodded sadly, but kept her chin up. There was no looking back now, and she couldn't fix what was in the past. She could only hope to do her best to not disappoint everyone she loved in the future.
While the rest of the family gave them some space, Renesmee and her parents went back into the kitchen where Nahuel and his sisters were still waiting.
"Did we come at a bad time?" Nahuel asked, his eyes darting in the direction of the Great Room. Edward smiled, embracing the bronzed man.
"You couldn't have come at a better time, old friend," he replied. "I know Renesmee is glad to have you here to talk to."
After everyone had met Estrella and Isadora, Renesmee glanced outside to look for Jacob and the rest of the pack, who had still not returned.
"Jacob is assigning patrol routes for the night shifts," Edward replied, hearing her thoughts. She nodded, looking eagerly out the windows.
I missed him, she thought. Now that things are better…I want to be with him all the time…
Edward's eyes flicked up to meet hers and she shrunk down into her chair slightly. I'm sorry, Dad, she thought to him. I figured out about…this imprinting thing on my run home. Why didn't you ever tell me?
Edward motioned to her, and together they darted up to Eleazar's private office.
She stood in front of the windows looking out over the lawn, spying Jacob in human form, talking to a half circle of wolves around him. They were deciding who would run what route and when during the nights and days until they heard back from Damon. And she knew that they would.
"Please try not to worry about that," Edward said gently. She looked at her father and smiled. He had always wanted to protect her from everything evil and dangerous in life, and just because she was full grown that certainly hadn't changed.
"You're right, it hasn't," he said, answering her thought. She blushed, looking down to trace her finger along the edge of Eleazar's mahogany desk.
"You know, you could have told me about Jacob imprinting on me," she said, her voice soft but firm. She was still upset that no one had told her what was going on, yet she knew that anger was not the way to prove her point. Yelling and throwing a bit of a tantrum was what she would have done a year ago. Not anymore.
Edward crossed his arms, leaning against the window frame. "You have grown up. You're completely right," he mused, giving her a crooked smile. "Although I wouldn't blame you in the least for being upset with me," he admitted.
"I'm not upset, Dad. I just wish…I just wish it would have been done differently is all. He obviously had imprinted on me…awhile ago."
"At birth."
"He did?" she asked, her eyes wide. She hadn't guessed it had been that early – she needed to talk to Jacob about the details of the imprint thing right away. "Yes, and…no one even gave me a chance to handle it."
"Could you have?"
She shrugged, glancing back out the window. "I don't know…"
Edward sighed, squeezing her elbow. "You know, I've lived over a century and I still have so much to learn."
She sighed, looking up into his perfect golden eyes. "Dad, I just…I'm trying to take responsibility for everything now and be a grown up like I'm supposed to. And I'm sorry for everything…it was stupid to run off with Damon, it was even stupider to abuse Stefan's feelings, and-"
He held up a white hand to her. "Renesmee, these are all mistakes a normal eighteen-year-old could make."
"Dad, you and I both know that I'm seven."
"True, but I consider a human adult to be eighteen. However, I know that even though a normal person turns eighteen doesn't mean that they automatically have the thoughts, feelings, sense of responsibility that a normal adult does. I realize that that can take time," he replied.
She nodded. "You get it," she quietly fumed. "Now I just need everyone else to."
"They'll understand eventually. You're practically one of a kind, Renesmee. You'll figure things out."
"Sometimes I feel like I never will," she said sadly, still tracing the edge of Eleazar's desk. "There should be a manual on how to do things."
Edward smiled wryly. "Ah yes, that one. 'How to raise your hybrid daughter'...mmm, yes, I hear it was a best seller."
"Dad," she pleaded. "I just…I'm trying. I'm trying to make up for everything that I've done wrong."
"I understand that. I respect that, as well."
"Which brings me back to Jacob."
"Ah, yes, Jacob."
Renesmee listened patiently as her father described to her the circumstances around Jacob imprinting on her – it was a huge taboo at the time, and something that Edward and Bella didn't fully understand much less have an idea how to explain to her. Therefore, they had decided to wait until she was seven to do so. Then, when the kiss in the woods had happened with Jacob and they had left for Denali, there hadn't been much time for them to explain much of anything. They had even doubted the power of the imprint bond when Stefan had appeared in her life.
She was still a bit irritated at her parents for not telling her about it, but her need to be mature and deal with the news as an adult would stifle her longing for reproach.
They returned back to the kitchen where Jacob and his pack were filing in to eat something.
"You make food?" Isadora stuttered in broken English to Carmen, who was heating up the oven.
"Yes, I cook for all these lobos!" Carmen laughed, tossing her long, dark hair over her shoulder. Jacob trotted into the kitchen at the mention of food, followed by Collin, who skidded to a halt in the doorway. His eyes widened, scanning the crowd of Renesmee, Carmen, the pack, Nahuel, Isadora, and finally, Estrella.
Renesmee watched in complete wonder as his jaw dropped open slightly, his face going slack. His dark brown eyes widened as he took in the sight of her, leaning against the counter in her dirty jeans and t-shirt.
One by one, everyone in the kitchen seemed to stop talking as Collin stared at Estrella, who was still standing against the counter, her eyes darting around the room. Isadora had taken a slightly defensive stance behind Carmen, who was stirring a huge pot of pasta on the stove with little interest. She, like everyone else, was staring at the scene going on right in front of them.
A chorus of chuckles and whispers rose up between the wolf pack boys. "Oh shit," Embry snorted, laughing into his hand.
"Oh…my…god…" Brady laughed. Seth just looked between the two of them, a look of shock on his face, and Jacob just smiled knowingly while nodding his head.
"Did I miss something?" Renesmee asked suddenly, and every eye in the room shot to meet hers. Every eye except for Collin, who was staring straight at Estrella.
"Collin, you alright man?" Jacob asked cautiously, putting his hand on Collin's bare shoulder.
Collin jumped, breaking his eye contact with Estrella. "What?"
"Are you alright?" Jacob repeated, eyeing Estrella nervously. Renesmee watched as Collin stared at her again while Estrella calmly walked up him, her own eyes full of wonder and exhilaration. She stopped about two feet from him, her eyes almost even with his, and smiled. Collin's eyes widened even more as he let out a shaky breath, and then he inhaled slowly as he stared at her.
She turned her head and frowned slightly at him almost expectantly as she stood in front of him, and when he did nothing, she looked over at Nahuel and Isadora. Collin continued to stare at her, his expression was a mixture of awe and excitement, until Estrella opened her mouth.
"Blood?"
Collin closed his mouth as Estrella looked at Nahuel expectantly, jutting out her chin and her pouty pink lips.
"She wants to hunt," Nahuel said slowly. "I should probably take her. She's gotten used to feeding now, and doesn't care as much for human food," he explained slowly, his eyes darting to Collin.
"Who….what…" Collin gasped, suddenly shaking his head and looking around the room. He looked like he had just been woken up unexpectedly from a deep, peaceful sleep. Renesmee looked at Jacob in question; what had just happened? One second Collin looked like he was in love, and then the next…he looked completely horrified.
"Come, Estrella," Nahuel urged her gently. "We'll go find some squirrels for you," he added. She looked like she recognized the word, and left eagerly with him, casting Collin one last questioning glance.
The boys all exhaled in speechless shock as they looked at a still frozen Collin.
"I gotta….I…I'll…be…somewhere else," he muttered, bolting from the room.
Jacob watched as Collin disappeared from the kitchen, amused looks on their faces. She stood up quickly, darting to Jacob's side. "What happened?" she asked him frantically. "One minute he was fine, the next he…he…"
Jacob smiled calmly at her as his pack mates continued to make fun of Collin's face and laugh amongst themselves behind him.
"Collin just…imprinted on that half breed," Jacob replied calmly, giving Renesmee an amused smile. He crossed his arms over his bare chest, waiting to see what she would say.
Renesmee gaped at him for a second, taking that all in. So…was that what Jacob had done to her?
He seemed to read her mind for a moment, and he gave her another pleased smile.
"Understand better now?"
She nodded, looking at the place where Collin had just stood. Now more than ever she wanted more details on imprinting.
He seemed to read her thoughts again as he watched her take it all in. "Let me grab a quick bite to eat, and then we'll go somewhere and I'll explain. Okay?" he asked, eying the spaghetti Carmen was placing on the island for the boys. Pasta was easy for her because it was relatively difficult to cook wrong. The boys dug in, and Renesmee nodded at Jacob who quickly grabbed a plate.
After dinner, they headed up to her bedroom with a few stern looks from Edward, but with little resistance. They sat on her bed, facing each other as she waited to hear Jacob explain everything.
She crossed her legs and put her hands in her lap, waiting patiently. "Well?" she finally asked.
He frowned, his black eyebrows pushing together in the middle of his tan face. "Well, what?" he asked.
Renesmee huffed, throwing her pale hands into the air. "Explain everything! Imprinting, the deal with my parents, the last seven years, whatever the HELL just happened to Collin down there! Just…ulgh, everything!" she demanded.
Jacob raised on eyebrow and shook his head. "Are you done now?"
She clicked her tongue in an annoyed fashion, then settled down. "I guess. Spill. What happened to Collin?"
Jacob took a deep breath, looked down at the bedspread nervously, and sighed. "He imprinted on…whoever that was."
"Estrella."
"Right. Well, he imprinted on her."
"So….they're like…in love?"
Jacob shook his head. "No, Ness, not really. That just means that they're soul mates - made for each other. He's her perfect match. Quileute's believe that our spirits are made for one other person, and one person only. Like fate."
"So wait….he didn't pick her?"
Jacob winced, then shook his head. "No, he didn't. But that doesn't mean anything!" he added quickly. "Imprinting is about getting to know the subject of whoever it is and winning them over by being whatever they need you to be, like I said earlier…"
"So…is that what you did to me?"
Jacob looked a little uncomfortable, but shrugged his shoulders. "Well, it was a bit different than that. Honestly…Just…Ness, promise you won't get upset with me, okay?"
She nodded, taking a deep breath. Whatever he wasn't telling her yet didn't look like good news. At all.
"When I imprinted on you, I had originally come to the house to….k-kill you."
Her eyes widened so large that for a moment it felt like they would sail out of her sockets. "You…you what?"
"Ness, remember what I said. We didn't know what you were. So I…I was going to take care of you. I thought you were a monster that killed my best friend and…I didn't understand what you would be. When I saw you I…"
"You imprinted on me," she said slowly. Her mind raced as she strained to remember those first few hours of her life. They were slightly blurrier than the rest of her life, but these memories became clearer and clearer as she grew. She had a select few that she could play back with complete recall: the first time she saw her parents; her first feeding with Rose; being measured by Carlisle, playing in the bathtub with Esme…and seeing Jacob for the first time.
"How had I not noticed that before?" she asked, her voice just above a whisper. She was deep in thought as she mulled over the time he had seen her over Rosalie's shoulder, just barely an hour old.
"I don't know…I was hoping you'd forget really…"
"No, Jake, I don't want to forget!" She gasped, grabbing his hands in hers. She squeezed them tightly, her eyes still wide as she thought. "You wanted to kill me…That's messed up…." She whispered in disbelief. She looked sideways at Jacob, still coming to grips with the fact that the wanted to actually kill her. The person who was her other half, her best friend, her soul mate…had wanted to kill her at first. Her mind raced as it put everything together.
"So…you imprinted on me as a baby?" she asked skeptically, her nose crinkled up.
"Well…it's not the same way Collin imprinted on her. It's a bit different with smaller…people," he added awkwardly.
Renesmee made a face at him and tried to keep all the details straight. "So…you imprinted on me as a baby, but not like Collin did?"
Jacob sighed and ran his hands through his hair in frustration.
"How do I even begin to explain this…"
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
Jacob sighed as he and Renesmee walked back down the steps into the Great Room. He hoped that he had explained imprinting and what had happened to Renesmee thoroughly enough, but how could be possibly even begin to explain something that odd and complicated? There was no way. He could simply hope that he had done the best he could.
His nostrils flared as he walked down the steps behind her. Looking up, an annoyed look crossed his face when he spotted Stefan in the corner of the Great Room, gazing out the tall glass windows where Damon had been just a short time ago.
When they got to the bottom of the steps, he watched Renesmee's face change when she spied him, and his thoughts instantaneously grew dark. She was sad for him, that much was clear. Personally, he still wanted to rip the fucker to shreds, but that wasn't up to him. He knew that would hurt Renesmee, and he wasn't willing to do that in order to get even with a stupid bloodsucker.
Renesmee turned and looked up at him, almost asking for silent permission. He gave her a short nod, trying his best to keep his expression casual as Stefan turned around and looked at them. He watched as his imprint practically floated up to the vampire in the corner of the room, wrapping an arm around his waist. She laid her copper head on his shoulder, releasing a small sigh. Stefan glanced at Jacob blankly, and Jacob did the same.
An hour ago, he had been sure that Renesmee had picked him. Now, looking at something like this…he wasn't so sure. He watched for a moment from the bottom of the steps. Renesmee stroked Stefan's arm, but it wasn't anything…flirty. It was more…comforting. But how could it not be? Anytime she touched Jacob he was instantly calmer. Feelings of jealousy and vile rose up in his chest, and he had to swallow a few times to make them go away.
At that moment, he just wanted Stefan to go away – period.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
They stood together in front of the tall windows, gazing out at the sunset as it dipped below the tree line. The sun's last rays of day made the fresh snow that covered the backyard glitter.
Renesmee looked up at Stefan, squeezing his arm. "Are you alright?" she murmured after a few more silent moments. He tore his green and golden eyes away from the shimmering lawn, thinking for a moment. His gaze met hers, and he shrugged.
"I guess I have to be."
"They won't kill him, Stefan. They won't kill your brother. We can work this out and…and maybe he could be good again."
Stefan laughed bitterly, his voice low. "Damon upsets me, but he doesn't surprise me. I never expected him to return peacefully."
"He might. We don't' know that," she pointed out.
Stefan sighed, pulling her closer to his side. "Renesmee, one of the things that I love about you is your ability to always see the good in things. And people."
Renesmee stared out the back windows. One of the things that he loves about me? As in…he loves me? Oh god, this is so bad…
Trying to ignore his words, she took a deep breath. "Stefan, things could still work out and be okay. I know Damon is…well, Damon, but…maybe he can learn to be good again. If anyone could help him, it would be you."
Stefan stared out at the lawn, not blinking. "I used to think I was good, but…now I'm not so sure."
"Why do you say that? Why would you say such a thing? Of course you're good."
Stefan was silent for a moment. "Not good enough, apparently."
Renesmee's stomach sank a little as she realized that Stefan wasn't just unhappy about Damon. He was upset about her, too.
She thought for a moment, pressing her lips together as his gaze shifted back to the lawn. She loosened her grip on his arm, pulling away to look at him.
"You're plenty good. I don't deserve you, much less your friendship."
Stefan shuddered slightly at the word 'friendship' and she heard him swallow.
"You deserve far more than what I can give you."
"Stefan…"
"No," he said firmly. He fell silent again, his fingertips gripping her side as she leaned against him.
"Do you hate me?" She asked thoughtfully.
He blinked, his long eyelashes dashing across the tops of his pale cheeks. He slowly sighed and shook his head.
"No, Renesmee, I don't. I…I wanted to, but…I can't hate what I love the most," he replied gently, turning to look at her.
She felt her heart fall to her feet.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
She stared at herself in the mirror, hating what she saw. She saw a life-ruining, selfish being that had been completely careless with the emotions of a very fragile being.
I hate myself, she thought, turning her head to the side. What she had done to Stefan would not go away, no matter how she looked at it. Sure, she and Jacob were somewhat happy now that they were getting their feelings sorted out, but at what cost? She had nearly killed Stefan emotionally with her choice.
If I hadn't acted like an immature little deviant in the first place, none of this would have happened. How could I have been so careless? I used him…and now instead of just me being hurt, we're both miserable, she thought.
The image of a forlorn looking Stefan standing in front of the windows in the great room, blankly staring off into space had made her heart break in sadness. How could she have been so cruel to use him like that? She would give anything to be able to go back and do the past few months over again with the knowledge she had now.
But I suppose that's part of growing up…realizing that mistakes have consequences...and in my case…big ones, she thought.
The steam from the running shower eventually clouded the mirror across from her too much to see. She peeled off her clothes and stepped in, hoping that the warm jets would help her ease her jumbled mind.
Things would be good now if she wouldn't have been such an immature monster when arriving in Denali. Had she acted like she wanted to now, she would have been able to be with Jake and possibly even have Stefan as a friend had she not used him. She felt her body sliding down the white tiles to curl up on the shower floor. Drawing her knees up to her chest, she sat there in the steaming water to try to sort out her thoughts and calm the dull ache that had began to pound in her chest.
Before she knew what was happening, tears had begun to form in her eyes, threatening to spill over. The picture in her mind of Jacob on one side, Stefan on the other, made her sob. The feeling of breaking someone's heart was almost as bad as having her heart broken, and boy did she know how that felt. Her actions with Stefan had been merciless, and now she had to pay the price for them. Squeezing her eyes shut, the hot liquid ran down her cheeks, meshing with the streams of water.
When would everything be okay again?
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
*whew*
Well I hope you enjoyed meeting the hybrids! I won't go into too much detail about them in this story because I want to focus on Renesmee and Jake, but I did want to show Collin imprinting on Estrella so that Renesmee could see what happens when a wolf imprints. That said, I've already gotten questions about what happens on the imprintee's side of things when she is imprinted on – honestly, I don't know that SM ever goes into that. I wanted to show that Estrella was drawn to Collin, even though HE imprinted on HER.
While we're on the topic of Estrella, her name is pronounced 'Es-tray-ya' for those of you who don't speak Spanish. Translated, it means 'star' which I thought was fitting for a beautiful hybrid : )
IMPORTANT! A few chapters ago, I asked who you thought the spinoff star would be for Untouchable. A few of you guessed right: Collin. I have a short story planned out and partially written for Collin and Estrella, but I just wanted to see if people would read it. There are only ten chapters and they are MUCH shorter than Untouchable – it's just a short little story about a wolf that tries to avoid his imprint and what happens with those two. If you would like to read it, let me know. I have most of it written, but I am on the fence about posting it or not, as I realize Collin is a bit of a secondary character. The fic is from Collin's POV, and starts off when Jacob summons the pack up to Alaska to help with Damon. I had written it just for fun, but I will post it if I think people are interested. Please let me know if you would like to hear more about these two!
That said, review!
