AN: Only a short one this time after my monster last chapter. Enjoy.
38 – Never Apologize… Unless…
Our return flight from England was quiet, having spoken more than I intended the night before, Ducky and I sat in relative silence for the duration of the flight. Not in a, "Oh god I can't believe I said all that, I am so embarrassed," silence but in a, "I am so relieved I got that off my chest and now am happy to sit with my friend in comfortable silence," silence. We chatted about inconsequential things such as the movies available to watch, an article in the inflight magazine that interested us, or how nice the stewardess's legs would look wrapped around my hips. OK so Ducky did hit me with his magazine after that comment (but I still noticed him checking out her legs and am pretty sure he was thinking the same thing).
We returned to work the next day and as soon as we arrived Gibbs was off to "grab some coffee" but in reality I know he was off to see Ducky to find out how I was. Judging by the dark storm cloud over his head when he came back, Ducky was true to his word and kept my deep dark secrets to himself.
I walked up to Gibbs desk and his head remained down pretending to look intently at his computer screen, "You know it was the strangest thing, Ducky was at the airport when I arrived. Decided he was going to have a spontaneous trip back to the UK."
"Did he now? Told me he wanted a couple of days but didn't say where he was going."
"Oh? 'Cause you know what's funny is that I kept wondering how did Ducky know which flight I was on? I mean he would have had to have found out that info to be able to book himself a seat. You wouldn't know anything about that would you Boss?"
"Can't say that I do, DiNozzo."
"Liar!" Gibbs head shot up expecting to have a very angry DiNozzo on his hands to deal with, but instead I stood before him grinning from ear to ear.
"Well maybe I might have helped him find out." Was Gibbs actually looking abashed?
"Hmm. Anyway, we had a very nice time, all things considered."
"Well, good. I'm glad to hear it." Now he was looking just a little to proud of himself.
Now came the angry face, "Don't you ever meddle in my personal life like that again, am I clear Jethro?"
Gibbs looked like he was about to burr up but something in my eyes made him stop. He knew I was serious. As much as I appreciated the sentiment, the invasion into my privacy was something I was not happy about. Instead he nodded and simply said, "Understood Tony."
"Thank you." I walked back to my desk and took a seat. "Oh by the way, I bought you a present but left it at home. How about I come over tonight and give it to you… I'll bring the beer?"
Gibbs grinned then, "Sure, I think I have a couple of steaks I can cook up."
That evening I arrived to the smell of beef sizzling over an open fire. We cracked our first beers and I gave him my little gift. It was a Big Ben wind up toy that moved on little feet and played 'God Save the Queen'. It was by far the tackiest gift I could find. We sat in what appeared to be companionable silence, but unlike my flight with Ducky I was trying desperately to come up with a way to start the conversation. Thankfully Gibbs did that himself. "So the funeral went well I hear."
"Yeah it did. I think Nana Jo would have liked it."
"Good, good. Ducky said your family was very nice."
"Yeah, they are good people. Of course I think Ducky may have been a bit biased by their accent."
"Did he tell any of his stories?"
"Oh. My. God. He was in heaven! Everyone just hung of his every word. I am pretty sure he could have gotten lucky with a few of my Nana's friends if he hadn't been so focused on me."
"So you guys talked?" And here it was. Where he wanted to be.
"Yeah we did. I hope you didn't get too angry at Ducky for not telling you anything. It's just that… I have a lot of … stuff and I just didn't want it made common knowledge. That's all."
Gibbs went to the fire and removed the steaks, placing them on a plate for each of us. I looked around for the cutlery but there was none. Gibbs went into the kitchen and handed me a knife and fork, "Rule 9 DiNozzo."
"I didn't think that applied to dinner at your house."
"It's 'never go anywhere without a knife', not 'never go anywhere without a knife unless it is to dinner at your boss's house'." I grinned at the little game we played.
"Right, won't happen again boss."
We ate for a while before Gibbs spoke again, "You know you can tell me anything Tony. It won't change my opinion of you."
"I know but you may regret having said that."
"And why's that?"
So I told him everything I had shared with Ducky, from my mother's death to my father's disapproval of me and my rebellious ways, I told him the reason I was expelled, the whole reason and not just the abbreviated version Ducky had heard. He heard about my screwed up gene pool and my fears of having to possibly face mental illness myself one day regardless of how remote the possibilities realistically were. I told him of my issues of being continually betrayed by those I trusted. Finally I said, "I'm sorry Gibbs. I know, I know, never apologize but I have to. I am sorry I locked you out. I know you were trying to help me and I just wasn't in a place where I could accept your help."
"Well, don't make that mistake again."
I couldn't help but grin, "I won't, I promise."
"Good. Talking about help, I imagine that plane ticket must have cost a pretty penny so if you need any money…" He stopped when I started choking on my beer.
He started slapping me on my back but when I was able to talk again I said, "Well thank you Boss, but I don't think that will be an issue. Firstly, Ducky paid for my ticket when he upgraded me to First Class."
"Really! I knew his mother had some money…"
"And also because… well it would appear I am about to inherit over two million dollars."
Gibbs beer halted halfway to his mouth. "You're kidding me!"
"Nope. Nana left a third of her estate to each of her kids and with Mom gone…"
"It goes to you." I nodded.
He drank up again. "Well next time how about you buy a decent present instead of that Big Ben piece of crap."