Disclaimer: I own neither Naruto nor Harry Potter.

Snow

Normally, I dislike lying, especially to Naruto. However, there are instances in which doing so is perfectly acceptable. This is one of those.

"I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about," I state, looking Naruto straight into the eyes. "How did you even come up with that?"

Naruto stands in front of me, arms crossed in front of him, glaring at me. "Who kissed you?!" he demands to know.

"Stop being troublesome," I order. "It's none of your business."

"Yes, 'cause you're my friend and I gotta protect you!" Naruto yells, pointing at me. "What do you have to say for yourself, young lady?!"

My jaw drops. "Did you seriously just 'young lady' me?" I ask incredulously.

"Who kissed you?!"

I groan and hide my face in my hands. Naruto's been at this for ten minutes while we wait for Sasuke to arrive. There's just no reasoning with him.

"…and Shikamaru said-"

"Damn it, shut up!" I snap, looking up. "If I need your help, I'll ask for it, but this is a private matter and none of your business. The same goes for Shikamaru."

At least now I know why my brother kept giving me those weird looks during dinner yesterday. I'm almost glad I get to leave the village for a mission. Hopefully, Shikamaru will have forgotten by the time I'm back.

Yeah. Very likely.

"Sasuke!" Naruto shouts. "Someone kissed Ri-chan! We gotta do something!"

I give Sasuke a desperate look that says 'Don't say anything!' which seems to amuse him greatly, not that Naruto notices, being too caught up in his idiotic mission of protecting me from the 'evil kissing fiend', as he called him.

"And what does Riko have to say about this, dobe?" the evil kissing fiend asks. I give him a grateful look.

"She's being stupid!" Naruto complains, flailing his arms around. He kind of looks like a demented chicken. "You gotta help watch her!"

My jaw drops for the second time that day. "You've got to be kidding me!" I exclaim. "Hell no!"

"Fine," Sasuke says, ignoring me.

"Don't go along with him!" I shriek. "Damn it, you assholes!"

"It's for your own good, Ri-chan!" Naruto argues. "Really!"

"And what's your excuse?" I ask Sasuke. He just smirks.

I'm pretty sure he just wants to annoy me. That, and he's smug about Naruto not even suspecting him.

"Tch," I growl. "We've got a mission. And because you guys suck, I'm not going to tell you what it is. You fuck up, see if I care."

Kakashi left leading our team to the port town where we're meeting the client to me. We'll be meeting him there. 'Practice for leading missions', he called it. I'm pretty sure that he's just being lazy.

He hasn't left us completely alone, though. Oh no. We have extra protection.

"Carry me!" Pakkun orders.

"You're a ninja dog. You can walk," I reply, scowling.

"Wow, someone got up on the wrong side of the basket…" Pakkun mutters.

"Hey, Pakkun!" Naruto greets the dog. "Ri-chan won't tell us where we're going!"

"We're going to watch a movie," I growl. "Now shut it."

I walk up to the guard booth at the village gate to notify the guards of our leaving.

"Hello, Kotetsu-san, Izumo-san," I greet. "Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke and Nara Riko, heading out." I hand them the slip of paper that has the Mission-ID, our destination and our signatures on it.

"First mission as a chunin!" Izumo exclaims with fake enthusiasm. "Excited?"

"I can hardly contain myself," I reply in a sarcastic tone while Kotetsu jots down the exact time of day on some form and then hands it to me to sign.

He grins at me. "Can we congratulate to something?" he asks mischievously.

I stare at him blankly. "My promotion?" I ask, signing my name.

"No, no!" Izumo waves that comment aside. "We heard Naruto finally confessed to you!"

My jaw drops again. "What?" I ask in a strangled voice.

"On the Hokage Monument no less. Who know that squirt could be so romantic… Now, you two, behave on the mission, alright?" Kotetsu answers. He waggles his eyebrows at me. "Don't get carried away!"

"But we aren't- Naruto didn't-" I sputter. "It's a misun-"

"Now get going, little Nara!" Kotetsu orders. "The mission calls!"

"Butbutbut-" I protest helplessly, flailing my arms around uselessly.

"Sorry, we'd chat more, but the next group wants to head out. See ya soon, good luck on your mission!" Izumo says and then turns to a jounin that is just now stepping up to the booth, the ninja of his group waiting in the background. I have no choice but to go.

"What's wrong?" Sasuke asks, studying my expression.

"Nothing!" I snap. "Everything is fine!"

I launch a few senbon at Naruto. It doesn't make me feel better.

"Oi! What was that for!"

"Nothing!" I hiss. "Let's go!"

Kami, am I glad to get out of the village.

We arrive at the town where we're meeting the client a few hours later. The trip was surprisingly eventless. It makes me kind of wary.

We find the cinema soon enough and Pakkun dismisses himself.

"Quick question," I announce. "Does anybody else find it weird that Kakashi-sensei got us tickets to a movie in a town hours away from Konoha? I mean, how did he even get these?" I wave the movie tickets around.

"Huh, now that you mention it..," Naruto muses. "But it's Kakashi-sensei!"

"Hn," Sasuke agrees.

"Right, just checking," I mutter.

"Why're we watching a movie right before we meet our client anyway?" Naruto asks. "Ri-chan?"

"Wouldn't you like to know," I state. "Now if you promised to back off about-"

"Never, dattebayo!"

"Then you'll have to wait," I finish. "Come on."

We enter the cinema, show our tickets and then go find our seats – Naruto wanted to watch the movie from the ceiling for training purposes, but Sasuke and I managed to convince him not to. It would have been really embarrassing if someone thought we had snuck in to watch without paying.

Soon, the movie starts.

I've been looking forward to this. I've never ever watched a movie in a cinema, only on the television in our living room. Soon, I find myself captivated by the movie. The actors are really good and the story is inspiring, if a little cheesy. Only the fighting scenes are a bit awkward for us ninja to watch. Still, it's a great movie. Now, if only Naruto would stop shouting encouragements and warnings at the characters on screen…

When we step out of the cinema and head to where Kakashi told me we would meet him, Naruto is raving on about Princess Fuun, the heroine of the movie. Incidentally, the actress that plays her character, Fujikaze Yukie, is the person we were hired to guard, not that Naruto knows that.

"Man, that was so great!" he chatters. "She was like 'I won't give up!' and then-"

"So if she kissed you, should I lock you up and have Sasuke guard you for your own good?" I ask.

"-and then Fuun was all awesome! I wonder if there are any princesses like her around," Naruto continues, not listening. "Any ninja would be proud to fight for her!"

"Dobe," Sasuke says evenly. "It was just a movie."

"So no one is going to acknowledge my words?" I ask incredulously. "You're just going to ignore me and my sound arguments against being guarded by you idiots?"

"This is the meeting place?" Sasuke asks.

I glare at him and Naruto. "No ramen and tomatoes for either of you. Unless there's a rabbit named Tomato, that one you can eat."

I might be a tad little unhappy with the rabbits after the Flash Ninjin Seven fiasco. It took me over an hour to fix the mess in my room.

"But Ri-chan!" Naruto protests.

"Unless you back off-"

"Never!"

"Dobe. Ri. Quiet," Sasuke orders and we instantly shut up, recognising his 'We're on a mission and trouble is near, you idiots' – voice.

I scan our surroundings. Damn Naruto for distracting me.

"What's wrong, bastard?" Naruto asks.

"That," I answer, pointing at the ground. It looks like a few dozen horses ran over it. Which makes no sense, this area should be deserted and most definitely free of horses. It's the centre of town, after all. I groan, rubbing my forehead. "Another adventure. Yay. Let's go investigate. Kakashi's probably not going to show up for another half hour anyway." Sasuke gives a jerky nod while Naruto enthusiastically runs over to the tracks and follows them into the city.

What could a herd of horses be doing in the middle of town? I ask myself as Sasuke and I follow Naruto.

It's pretty easy to find out where the horses went. While there are hardly any tracks left on the firm ground of the streets, knocked over carts and whispering people tell us exactly which path the horses took. I catch a few whispers from the surrounding people about a group of riders and stop to ask what happened.

"A group of riders in black armour was chasing a young woman! Knocked over my cart, too!" The man complains. "But that lady sure was a looker! Think I saw her in that movie, Princess Fuu or something."

"You mean Fuun?" I ask, frowning. Then my eyes widen in realisation and I run after my teammates with a "Thanks, Ojii-san!" thrown over my shoulder.

"Ruto! Sasuke!" I yell at them as I catch sight of them chasing after a group of riders. Naruto is already spamming out clones to catch them. 'Princess Fuun' is nowhere to be seen – she must have succeeded in her escape from her bodyguards, then. "Stop!"

"Eh?" Naruto protests. "But look what they did!" He sweeps out his arms at the chaos the riders left in their wake.

I ignore him and walk up to one of the riders, a brown-haired man with small round glasses. "My apologies, Asama-san. It appears there has been a misunderstanding." I turn to my teammates. "Guys, this is Asama Sandayuu-san, the client for our mission."

"Huh?" Naruto asks.

"You must be the Konoha ninja I hired, then. I'm impressed," Sandayuu states, studying the many clones and us. I wonder how he can see with those tiny glasses. Unless they are just for decoration?

I keep myself from flinching in surprise when Kakashi suddenly materialises directly behind me, putting his hand on my head. "That is correct. We were assigned the mission you commissioned. But perhaps we should discuss the details somewhere else?"

Sandayuu nods. "That might be for the best. Please follow me, I will take you to the director."

We follow Sandayuu as he leads us through the city to the film studios. The rest of the bodyguards left to further search for Fujikaze Yukie.

"Our mission is to escort and guard Fujikaze Yukie while the sequel to the movie we just watched is filmed in the Country of Snow," I explain to Naruto and Sasuke as we walk through the busy studio and approach an old man with an authoritative air who's talking to a blond guy carrying a megaphone. "She's the actress that plays Princess Fuun."

"That's right!" the blond says, apparently having caught the tail end of my explanation. "It's the first time we 're filming overseas. Fujikaze Yukie plays the most important role. Unfortunately, she's very much against traveling to the Country of Snow."

"I'm terribly sorry," Sandayuu apologises, bowing sadly. He glances at us and explains: "Yukie-sama has been trying to escape ever since she heard we were filming in Snow. I have yet to convince her of the necessity of cooperation."

"Necessity?" I ask curiously and just a tiny bit suspicious. Surely, a professional actress of Fujikaze Yukie's calibre wouldn't have a problem filming overseas? There might be something more going on.

Oh, who am I kidding? We're Team Seven. There's always something more going on.

"Yes. We will be filming at Snow Country's famous Rainbow Glaciers," the blond guy who has yet to introduce himself explains, pointing at a photo of said glaciers. "It was Sandayuu-sans recommendation to film there. It is said that in spring, the glaciers shine with seven colours, like a rainbow."

"That is nothing more than a myth," Kakashi interjects. "There is no spring in Snow Country."

"There's always winter there?" Naruto asks horrified.

"Snow Country is fairly far away…" Sasuke states.

"Don't worry," I say cheerfully. "I packed for you two." I pat my belt that once again hides a multitude of storage seals, just like the black bandages wrapped around my arms from wrist to elbows. My short white battle kimono with the Nara Clan symbol sewn on the back in grey – I wasn't in the mood for anything colourful, and I wanted to blend in with the snow in Snow Country – conceals a multitude of senbon and kunai, just like my light grey shorts. My kunai pouch is filled with explosive notes and also holds medical pills. Man, it feels good to be prepared.

"Kakashi-san, was it?" the old man – from his clothes and demeanor, I'm guessing he's the director – speaks up. "I heard you've been to Snow Country before."

"A long time ago," Kakashi answers, not saying anything further.

Curiouser and curiouser, I think.

Steps approach behind us. A hand leans casually on the back of my seat and I surreptitiously palm senbon beneath the wide sleeves of my kimono. I'm sure it's just a civilian, but being careful never hurt anybody. "I heard Snow Country is a poor nation," a man's voice says, and I turn around. The man that stands behind me aims a gleaming smile down at me and then at our group.

One might call him handsome, I suppose, and a lot of women probably go crazy over his smile, but not me. His grin may be gleaming, but I've seen better - Gai's and Lee's Good-Guy grins for one. And nothing in the world beats Naruto's sunshine-and-ramen grin.

"That's true," I tell the actor. "Their economy collapsed a few years ago with a change in regime. They do have very advanced technologies though," I reiterate what I researched after I heard where our mission was going.

"Hopefully, they'll have heaters!" one of two approaching actors jokes. "I don't really like the cold."

"You gonna run off like Yukie, then?" his friend retorts.

I narrow my eyes while the actors continue to rib each other good-naturedly. From the sounds of it, Yukie is a brat. Bugger.

"Yukie doesn't know the meaning of the words 'ambition' or 'motivation'," one of them explains for our benefit. "And she's really quite… helpless."

"But she was born to be an actress," the director cuts in. "She doesn't slack off when it comes to work. I don't care about an actor's private life," he says in a slightly scolding tone, looking at the three actors. "I won't complain as long as she's great in front of the camera." He pauses. "Come to think about it, she only started running away when it was announced that we'd be filming in Snow Country."

So Sandayuu wants us to escort an actress to a country she's vehemently against going to. To a location he suggested, and as her manager he's probably aware of whatever issue with Snow Country she has.

Not suspicious at all.

"Why only then?" Sasuke asks.

The director shrugs. "I wouldn't know. Anyways, please help find her. We're scheduled to leave tonight, and I'd like to have this mess sorted out by then."

We step outside the studio, Sandayuu in tow. "Ne, Kakashi-sensei, what should we do?" Naruto asks.

Kakashi looks at me.

"I'm not your errand girl!" I snap.

"Maa, Riko-chan, you need to practice your leadership skills." Kakashi eye-smiles at me in a very annoying way. "I've decided that you're leading this mission. I'm only an observer until things start getting out of control."

"It almost sounds like you expect them to," I say sarcastically. "Fine." I turn to Sandayuu. "Where does Yukie-san normally turn up after she runs away?"

Sandayuu shifts a little uncomfortably. "We have found her in bars once or twice before. My apologies for the inconvenience…"

I snort. "Don't worry about it. We picked our current Hokage up in a bar."

Sandayuu opens his mouth, then closes it. He's finally starting to look doubtful. I ignore him and turn to my team. "Naruto, make some clones and check the bars in town, please. And henge them, it might freak the townspeople out if dozens of you were running around."

"Sure, Ri-chan!" Seconds later, dozens of henge'd Naruto's run off into the streets.

Hmm. Maybe I should have specified that he shouldn't take the rooftop-route. Now the townspeople probably think they're being invaded by ninja… oh well, tomorrow, we'll be gone anyway.

It's a half hour later when Naruto finally calls out: "Found her!" and starts leading us through the streets into the poorer part of town until we finally reach a nameless rundown bar – definitely the shady kind, and not where any woman should be going by herself unless she knows some very effective self-defence. We enter cautiously.

Inside, it doesn't look any better. This is the kind of bar where people go to drown their sorrows. I wrinkle my nose at the unpleasant atmosphere and the smell of alcohol. Why anyone would willingly enter a place like this, I have no idea.

Fujikaze Yukie sits at the bar, a small cup in front of her, looking bleakly at a necklace hanging from her neck. She takes a sip from the cup and I narrow my eyes at her sluggish uncoordinated movements. She's definitely sloshed. I bet if we left her alone for another hour, she'd pass out and all we'd have to do was get her on the ship and leave town. She wouldn't be able to run again in the middle of the ocean, that's for sure. I'm almost about to suggest that plan of action when I see a man in a dark corner of the bar get up and drunkenly walk in Yukie's direction. Granted, she sits fairly close to the exit and anyone wanting to leave would have to pass her, but something tells me that this man's gaze, invisible under his cap, is focused on Yukie. Something about the man sends my senses tingling. I palm my senbon.

Naruto jumps inside, right to Yukie's side. "Finally found you, Princess Fuun!" he shouts. The man veers away from Yukie and walks closer to us. I follow him with my eyes, not letting him out of sight while listening with half an ear as Naruto berates our charge for getting drunk in a place like this. I

The man walks past us and out the door. I turn around to watch him leave. "Kakashi-sensei," I murmur. "Was that-?"

Was that an enemy or just my imagination?

He puts his hand on my shoulder. "Don't worry about it for now." I feel Sasuke stepping up next to me, a reassuring presence.

I nod jerkily, turning back to Yukie and Naruto when I hear Yukie's drunken, high-pitched laughter. "Actress? Great?" she mocks. "It's the worst job ever. You have to follow other people's scripts all the time and live in a world filled with lies!"

Kind of like a ninja, I think. But she chose her profession, just like us, so she shouldn't be complaining.

"Truly stupid," Yukie says disdainfully, staring into her cup, looking lost and lonely.

"Come on, let's get you home, Neechan," Naruto says gently, taking a step towards her.

Yukie abruptly turns to him, almost falling of her stool from the sudden movement. "You're annoying! Hurry up and disappear!" she yells.

"That's enough," I say coldly, stepping up to them, Sasuke right behind me. "Get yourself under control, Fujikaze-san."

The woman only gives me a scornful glance and turns back to her cup. I narrow my eyes. I doubt there's any reasoning with her at this point. And if she's mean to Naruto, well, it's her fault if I don't feel inclined to be gentle either.

"Yukie-sama!" Sandayuu pleads. "Our ship is departing soon! Please, we need to hurry!"

"It's okay…" Yukie says, and Sandayuu looks hopeful, not noticing the cruel undertone in her voice. "I'm not going to board," she continues, downing the rest of her sake.

"What are you saying?!" Sandayuu yells, a note of panic in his voice, and I decide I've had enough of Yukie's behaviour.

Our mission is to escort her to Snow Country. As long as there is no lasting and visible damage… I nudge Sasuke. "Do you mind?" I ask. He gives me a look that says 'are you stupid?' and taps Yukie's shoulder. She whirls around, probably with another scathing remark on her lips, but it dies out when she looks into Sasuke's sharingan eyes. Her eyes widen, then they go unfocused and slide shut. I catch her as she finally falls off her stool limply.

I expected someone, at least Naruto, to protest this treatment of her, but everyone just watches with sombre looks.

It leaves a bad taste in my mouth to start the mission this way. It seems like a bad omen.

"Right." I clear my throat. "Let's get her to the ship."

Two hours later and we're sailing. We deposited our charge in her room – being the lead actress, she gets the best room of course – and then helped the film crew get everything on board. It went quickly with the help of Naruto's clones. After that, everyone settled in for the night, with the exception of some members of the ship's crew and me – I volunteered for first watch since Naruto worked hard earlier and Sasuke used his sharingan while I only gave orders.

I'm pretty sure Kakashi is awake, too, but he's staying out of sight.

After doing a security sweep – everything calm and nice – I sit down at the very front of the ship, letting my feet dangle over the railing. I close my eyes and breathe in the salty ocean air, enjoying the breeze in my face as I listen to the sound of the three-master cut through the waves below me.

So much water. I open my eyes, taking in the moon- and starlit ocean. So beautiful.

It's at this moment I realise that I'm over my trauma. I want to jump onto the water and run next to the ship, I want to dive down and explore the depths of the sea, I want to make the water whirl and dance around me. I laugh quietly, happily. This mission might be troublesome, but for this moment alone, it's worth it.

The next morning, the three of us plus Kakashi watch as the film crew sets up cameras, painted backgrounds, spotlights, make-up tables and whatever else is necessary for whatever they have planned. Kami, I'd never want to work in this business. Way too troublesome for me.

"Now, Riko-chan, Naruto, I believe I should congratulate you two?" Kakashi muses, eye-smiling.

"No," I growl.

"Congratulate us?" Naruto asks, confused. "What're you talking about?"

"Nothing," I snap. "He's talking about nothing. And I'm sure he'll stop doing that right now!" I make a whip sound.

Kakashi flinches. I really need to learn the water whip.

"But Ri-chan-"

"So, let's talk about our roles in this mission," I cut him off. "Naruto, you get to protect Yukie."

"But I don't like her!" Naruto complains.

"Poor you," I answer. "Sasuke, you get to blast shit if we get attacked."

"Hn," Sasuke smirks.

"Not fair, dattebayo!"

"I get to kick ass and heal you idiots when you get injured," I continue, undeterred. "And Kakashi-sensei gets to swoop in and save the day when this mission goes to hell."

"Maa, Riko-chan, it almost sounds like you expect it to," Kakashi teases.

"I wonder why," I say sarcastically. "It certainly doesn't have anything to do with our client's suspicious behaviour."

"Eh?" Naruto asks.

"Anyways, folks, this is an A-ranked mission. We have yet to find out why exactly it was labelled an A and not B-ranked mission, so be on your guard. We don't know who the enemy is, but it's obvious there is one." I give them a serious look. "Something is going on here. It has something to do with Sandayuu, Yukie and Snow Country, and I'm pretty sure things will start going to hell soon, but I have full faith in our team. We can do this."

"Yatta!" Naruto cheers. "Of course we can! We're Team Seven!"

Sasuke smirks. Nice speech, his eyes say.

I roll my eyes at him.

"Well said, Riko-chan," Kakashi pats my shoulder awkwardly. Then he takes his book out and strolls away.

"So, team meeting over," I declare, clapping my hands. "Now, I know I promised I'd tell you about certain things once we got out of the village, but I'm sure you understand that we'll have to wait until we have a little more privacy than this." I gesture to the chaos of the movie set. "I promise I'll tell you as soon as I can."

I hold out my pinkie. Naruto immediately hooks his in. We look at Sasuke expectantly.

"No," Sasuke says. "Once is enough."

I roll my eyes at him. "Don't be such a stick-in-the-mud."

"Yeah, bastard! Pinkie swears are awesome!" Naruto agrees.

I grab Sasuke's hand and pull it to Naruto's and my joined hand. He tries to pull it back, but Naruto helps me. "Resistance is futile," I state. "Now pinkie swear."

Sasuke makes a very annoyed sound and very reluctantly hooks his finger in ours, glaring all the while.

"There, that wasn't so bad, was it?" I tell him brightly. He glowers at me. You're annoying, Ri.

And you're troublesome.

From somewhere inside the ship, a high pitched shriek sounds.

"Guess Yukie woke up," I deduce. "Do you guys think she's going to be mad?"

The door leading into the ships interior flies open and Yukie, barefoot and wearing pyjamas bursts through. "What is this?" she shrieks, staring in abject horror at the deck of the ship, the mast, the sails… she makes a distressed noise and sinks to her knees, looking miserable. Sandayuu comes out, puts his hand on her shoulder and speaks to her urgently. Then he helps her up and escorts her back inside.

"Oh yeah, definitely mad, once she gets over the shock," I state.

Yukie eventually came outside again, refusing to talk to anyone. She only listened to her instructions and then sat down at the make-up table where she's now looking into the mirror while her make-up and hair are being done.

Meanwhile, our team is watching. Naruto bounces up and down excitedly, commenting on everything he sees without really expecting an answer. I sit on the railing, bored already. Sasuke leans next to me, his mood somewhere between annoyed and bored, his dark eyes taking in everything.

I watch, mildly interested, as they start to shoot scenes from the movie. I'm actually impressed until Yukie interrupts a touching scene of her grieving over one of her fallen warriors so Sandayuu can put eye drops in her eyes because she is incapable of crying. Now, that would be excusable, but the way she is such a brat about it… I really can't stand her attitude.

The situation doesn't improve over the next few days. The novelty of watching the actors at work wore off after the first day and boredom took its place. Being cooped up on this ship with so many other people is getting on all of our nerves. Plus, Naruto is clingy and started glaring at any male that isn't part of the team if they even look like they want to talk to me.

It's kind of hilarious that the only one he seems to trust with me is Sasuke.

Sometimes, I run on the water next to the ship when I need to escape, and I relish the silent moments during the night when it feels like it's just me and the ocean. Kakashi occasionally joins me, but we don't really talk during those moments.

The weather grows colder. Much colder. Warm, light grey leggings and fingerless gloves are added to my outfit and my shinobi sandals get replaced by warm ninja boots, as do Naruto's and Sasuke's. It's still way too cold for me.

Naruto has no problem with the cold. Due to his incredible large chakra reserves, his temperature is always a few degrees higher than a regular person's. Sasuke's is, too, due to his fire and thunder nature. Kakashi is Kakashi.

I on the other hand… Ninja can use a technique to keep themselves warm, but it takes concentration and it wears on the reserves. Since I want to save my power for the mission, I limit myself to using it once every hour. In the meantime, I abuse Naruto as my human heater. The nights, I spend cuddling up to either him or Sasuke, depending on who isn't on patrol shift.

I can't even enjoy the nights anymore. They're way too cold.

This mission is starting to kind of suck.

A loud dismayed scream causes me to shoot up from the bed. The problem is, I was wrapped in Naruto's arms and a blanket and Sasuke's hand was on my wrist, so everyone wakes up and tries to jump out of bed, and we all get entangled and fall to the floor.

"Damn it, Ri," Sasuke mutters, shoving Naruto off him, who just mumbles something like: "Awhahuh?" and blinks owlishly. I groan and get up, rubbing my backside. Then I remember what woke me in the first place and hastily grab my cloak. "Didn't you hear the scream?" I ask.

"What scream, Ri-cha-haaahhh-n?" Naruto mumbles, interrupted by a huge yawn

"Director! It's terrible!" sounds from upstairs.

"That scream," I state. "Doesn't sound like anyone is dying, though. I'll go check the situation."

I arrive on deck, Sasuke right behind me – like me he slept in his clothes, unlike Naruto who was still looking for his clothes when we ran out the room - and instantly see the problem. A humongous iceberg is in the way of our ship. Ahead of us, the director and his assistant are discussing something. Unseen by them, Kakashi casually leans against the railing, reading his book.

I shiver in the cold morning air. Not that the daytime makes a significant difference in temperature around here, it's always cold. "Sasukeeee?" I whine. "I'm cold."

"Hn," Sasuke says dismissively. Deal with it.

"And you're cold, too. Heart of ice," I grumble. "As chunin and mission leader, I order you, lowly genin, to serve as my human source of warmth."

"Abusing authority already?" Sasuke asks, sounding faintly amused.

"Warmth. Sometime today," I order. He rolls his eyes – he's wearing his henge – and pulls me against him. Then he puts an arm around my shoulders. A moment later, I feel him use chakra and the air around us warms. I sigh blissfully and lean against him. "If I'd known you could do that with fire chakra, I'd have stuck with you and not Ruto from the start."

He snorts. "Don't get used to it."

"Yes, yes," I say insincerely, relaxing in the cocoon of warmth Sasuke made for us. I should probably scold him for wasting his chakra like this. But it's just so comfortable.

Kakashi lands in front of us, eye-smiling. "Maa, aren't you two cute together?" he asks.

Sasuke attempts to shove me away. It doesn't work. I've glued myself to him with chakra.

"What's going on, sensei?" I ask. "Aren't we going to sail around that iceberg?"

"The director wants to use the location," Kakashi explains.

I groan, scanning the iceberg. Snow drifts, icy ridges, snowy slopes. Millions of hiding places. "That thing is a security nightmare." I shoot a look up at Kakashi. "I've got a bad feeling about this. If there's going to be an ambush, it'll happen here."

Kakashi nods. "Be on your guard. I'm coming with you and handle any jounin level opponents."

"Got it."

Naruto, Sasuke, Kakashi and I have spread out around Yukie while everything is made ready for the shoot. It's even more of a security nightmare than I thought it would be. The place is impossible to overlook, we're not allowed to move freely because we could disturb the set and there are people everywhere, running around without a care for their safety.

Also, it's way too early and way too cold. I've abandoned my cloak so I can wear my sword on my back. I'm starting to regret that decision.

"Alright, we're going to roll!" someone shouts after the actor that plays Princess Fuun's antagonist Mao has reached his position on an icy ridge, accompanied by people that are now straightening his clothes and giving last-minute instructions. "Scene 36, cut 22! Action!"

I palm my senbon with one hand and shift my stance, ready to draw my sword with the other. If I were an enemy, I'd attack during the movie shoot.

Mao steps forward and laughs evilly at Princess Fuun and her supporters below him. "So you made it here, Princess Fuun!"

"You're… Mao!" Yukie /Princess Fuun exclaims. She and her supporters draw swords. More banter is exchanged between her and her antagonist.

I tense. My senses, honed by Zabuza's training, are tingling. Someone is watching us.

I sign a warning at my team. Naruto and Sasuke are behind me, so I can't see if they saw the warning, but I see Kakashi right his hitae-ate, signalling that he got it.

"None of your worthless men are a match for me!" villain-actor shouts, pointing at Yukie. The icy pillar behind him explodes.

I draw my sword in one fluid motion, making it glow with chakra. Then I leap forward, landing next to Kakashi in front of Yukie. I sense Naruto and Sasuke flank us, slightly behind. We're forming a protective half-circle around Yukie. "What're you doing?!" some idiot civilian who apparently hasn't noticed we're under attack shouts behind us.

"Civilians, back on the ship!" I order. "We're under attack."

The smoke from the explosion dissipates. A man stands there – bony and thin face, long lilac hair in a ponytail. He's wearing some sort of white-blue full body suit – an armour? On his shoulder, there's some sort of metal device where what looks like a yin-and-yang symbol is embedded.

The man crosses his arms and smirks arrogantly. "Welcome to the Country of Snow," he greets.

"You're-" Kakashi murmurs, sounding shocked.

A curvy woman, also wearing that weird suit in addition to a helmet appears on an ice pillar, pink pigtails sticking out of the helmet, her green eyes glittering cruelly. "Welcome back, Princess Koyuki. You did bring the Hexagonal Crystal, right?"

Koyuki? She can't mean- oh bugger, I think as I see Kakashi turn around to look at Yukie, eyes wide with realisation.

I turn to the left where a large man surges up from the snow. This one has purple hair, puffy lips and cruel dark eyes. He too is wearing that weird armour, the contraption with the yin-and-yang symbol on his chest. Some sort of metal gauntlet encases his lower left arm and hand. He laughs. "I've gotta hand it to you, Hatake Kakashi. This is the closest we could get to the princess."

"Oh boy," I drawl. "An ambush. I so did not see that coming."