R&R

Total Drama © Fresh TV Inc. & Teletoon

Total Drama Redemption

Day Thirty Six (36)

A fifth week had gone by at Camp Suckitude.

If this was 'Divine Comedy', Total Drama Island would be the innermost circle of Inferno for sure.

Despite my best efforts, Trent had left the island, just like last time.

Okay, maybe they weren't my best efforts. I should have gone with Trent to the cabin.

But seriously, I thought Trent could handle himself. I had already looked after him for most of the day. My trust in him was misplaced.

Either way, if Trent saw Heather sitting on the dock, he would have approached the situation much more cautiously.

It's because he saw Lindsay there. That just threw him off his game. How was he supposed to know that he would get framed like this? No one did.

That's what made it all the more surprising. I somehow had to expect the unexpected. How does one prepare oneself for something that they don't see coming?

Heather is an evil genius. An evil genius that needs to leave before she causes any more chaos, as if what she had done already wasn't enough.

I was lying in bed thinking about all of these things. I got up, grabbed some new clothes and took a bath.

Entering the Cafeteria, I could see no one there except Chef.

"You wake up too damn late soldier!" Chef yelled. "When I was your age, I was in the army! We had to wake up at O-400 hours every day!"

"That's great to know." I stated flatly, getting my tray and sitting at the table.

I finished half of my food, threw the rest away and left.

"Surprise nutshot!"

Thwack! I felt a sudden pain in my unmentionables and fell to the ground.

"Izzy, what the hell was that for!?" I said in an abnormally high-pitched voice.

"Aw. Poor little Noah can't take a little kick to the balls?"

"I don't think most people can." I said, still clutching my groin area in pain.

"We'll just have to find out now won't we? I'm gonna do it to Duncan and see his reaction."

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

"Oh yeah? Well if I were you, I would just read my book and hurl insults at everyone."

"That's… actually a pretty good description of me."

"I know."

"So what do you think of Lindsay kissing Trent?" I asked her.

"Gwen was yelling at Lindsay in the cabins after the challenge."

"Tyler was doing the same to Trent."

"We decided to all vote for Trent. I knew there was something weird about him. He was just pretending to be normal and then WHAP!" She pounded her fist against her palm. "He kissed Lindsay! Like seriously, how could he do that!?"

"Something fishy is going on here."

"Sorry about that." She took a dead fish out of her skirt and tossed it away.

"Okay… I'm just gonna… go." I was about to leave when the loudspeaker sounded.

"Calling all teens! Head to the Confession Cam this instant!" Chris said.

What was this all about?

Why would Chris ask us to meet at the confessionals, of all places?

"I'm really sorry dude." Tyler said to me when I got there.

"Why?"

"I promised to train you every day so you could become the best fighter that there ever was."

"You did?"

"Yeah. But so much has happened in this place and I just couldn't find the time to teach you."

"No worries. Take as much time as you like." I said smiling.

"I knew you would understand." He patted me rather forcefully on the back. I wobbled a bit, but didn't face-plant.

"I see you're all here." Chris said.

"And why are we here?" Heather asked.

"Congratulations on making it to the final ten! Now it's time for mandatory confessionals!"

"Again?" Gwen asked. "We just did them after Eva left!"

"And now you're doing it again. The sooner you finish these, the sooner you can leave. So you better hurry."

Was he just going to keep making us confess after every damn challenge? What the heck?

Izzy told me that all the girls voted for Trent. Even if I had convinced all of the guys to vote for Heather, she still would have survived.

So I knew who voted for whom last night.

Bridgette – Trent

Duncan – Trent

Geoff – Trent

Gwen – Trent

Heather – Trent

Izzy – Trent

Leshawna – Trent

Lindsay - Trent

Noah - Heather

Trent – Heather

Tyler – Trent

Total: Trent (9); Heather (2)

Eliminated: Trent

At least Trent got NINE votes against him, it being his favorite number and all.

"Noah." Chris said, shaking me out of my thoughts. "Confession time!"

I opened the door to the Confession Cam.

Lindsay seriously needs to tone down on her use of perfume.

There was so much of it that the air was suffocating. Too much French Vanilla!

I coughed a bit, then wiped the air around me. I opened my mouth to speak.

"Trent, I'm sorry that you were voted off. I tried to convince the others that it wasn't your fault. I know you better than anyone here." I paused.

"Okay, maybe not Gwen, but I certainly know more about you than any of those Bass males. I know you wouldn't do something like that. I just hope Gwen realizes that."

Suddenly, Chris barged in. "Geez Noah, how sappy can you be?"

"What the heck? Were you listening to my confessional all this time?"

"Well… yeah. I'm the host. I was going to listen to it anyway."

"If you want something less sappy, how does 'Chris is a stupid moron who sucks major balls' sound?"

Chris grinned his plastic smile. "Much better." He said, closing the door on his way out.

"Can't a guy get a little privacy?" I asked before leaving myself.

Tyler was next. He screamed his head off in the confessional for a good ten minutes. Then the door opened.

"And what do you want!?" He asked, glaring at me.

"I want you to calm down." I said.

"I went into a little tirade about Trent."

"Little." I said, using finger-quotes.

"Sorry. I just got super-pissed at him. I didn't mean to yell at you. Do you want to go for a walk?"

"Meh. Alright."

We went for a little stroll in the woods. I heard the crunch of dried leaves under me.

"I never thought that I'd be doing this." I said.

"Doing what?"

"Walking along with a jock. Those guys used to seriously bug me back in high school."

"You know, I never really understood bookworms either. They barely lift a finger. How did you get through two years of high school anyway?" Tyler asked me.

"Two years!?" I said. "Ah yes, two years. I was friends with one of the toughest guys in school."

"How did you manage that?"

"Well he was getting low grades and instead of picking on me, he asked me for help. I tutored him and in exchange, he and his cronies would beat up anyone who I disapproved of."

"So you were like a gang leader. Pretty cool if you ask me."

"What? No! I had to stick really close to them for fear of getting beaten up. How is that cool?"

"Well when you put it that way…"

"I admit, most of the time, I was the one ticking them off. That's why I try to avoid large crowds and social gatherings."

"The jocks at my school tease me a bit, but they still let me go to all of their parties and stuff."

"Did I just hear someone say party!?" Geoff asked.

"Where did he come from?" Tyler asked me.

I shrugged. "No clue."

"My party-sense was tingling." He said. "Wait! I think I just heard Leshawna say it. Gotta go!" He zoomed off, leaving us in the dust.

"This place is getting freakier each day."

"Tell me about it."

"Anyway, I was kind of at the lower end of the pecking order. The other guys used to make fun of me because I was the only one without a girlfriend. Well who's laughing now!?"

"Them."

"Whatever. Lindsay is the hottest babe on the planet. Can't believe Trent would do that to her." He pounded his fists together. "When I get my hands on him-" His face turned red.

"Is that steam coming out of your ears?"

"Sorry. I guess Eva's not the only one with anger issues."

"Let's just hope she doesn't hear you say that." I muttered.

It had gotten darker.

"I think we should go back." Tyler said.

"I second that notion."

"What?"

"It means 'I agree'."

"Oh. You need to stop speaking so complexingly."

"I'm pretty sure that isn't a word."

"Of course it is. I need to take a piss."

"And you had to tell me that?"

"You're so full of yourself today, aren't you?"

"I try."

"Well how would you like it if I called you a dunderhead?"

"Gee. How insulting. Where did you learn such dirty words?" I asked sarcastically.

"Screw you Noah!" He went off to the bathroom and I went to the cabin.

Duncan was sitting impatiently on his bed with a knife in hand. He was tapping his foot.

"Whoa now! Don't go about killing anybody."

"Wouldn't dream of it." He said.

I wasn't tired, so I laid in my bed and read a book.

The day had been pretty unusual, but no weirder than the days before.

"How many times are you going to read that book anyway?" Duncan asked.

"Got anything better to do?"

"… Good point."

Tyler showed up a while later and started fiddling with his yo-yo.

"What took you so long?" Duncan asked.

"I had to go to the restroom." Tyler said. "What's the big deal anyway?"

"Now we just need Geoff." Duncan said.

"That's easy." Said Tyler. "Do you guys want to party?"

Immediately, a blur of pink ran in. "Did I just hear what I think I heard?" Geoff said.

"Now that we're all here, we can get to our order of business." Duncan said.

I put my book down and looked up from my book. Tyler dropped his yo-yo. Geoff was drinking soda.

"Geoff?"

"What? Oh, sorry." He put down the soda and we all listened to Duncan.

"Listen up boys, we're in trouble, okay? There are six chicks on the island and only four dudes."

"I know. Nice odds." Geoff said, earning a slap in the face from the punk.

"No dumbass! Bad odds! If I noticed it, chances are that sooner or later, they're going to notice it too. And when they do, they're going to pick us off one by one. We got to do something about it, or it's curtains for us all."

"It's not like they're exactly getting along." Tyler said. "Remember this morning?"

Apparently, Heather and Leshawna had gotten into a fight earlier in the day when they were in the girls' bathroom. And not just verbally, but physically.

And I had slept through the whole thing.

Damn me and my lazy tendencies!

"I don't know dudes." Geoff said, sighing. "Bridgette and I, we kind of hooked up. I don't feel right about joining an alliance without her."

"Let me tell you the truth about women." Duncan said. "They're all sisters, and when push comes to shove, they're gonna stick together. Haven't you ever seen a chick-flick before?"

"But that's a movie." I said.

"Look man, now's the time while they don't see it coming. While we have the element of surprise."

"I'm still not convinced." Geoff said.

"Guys, we have to unite and save our butts from elimination! Why can't anyone else see that?"

"I can see it." I said, then narrowed my eyes. "I just don't know if I can trust you."

"Because I'm a criminal?"

"No, because you're a Killer Bass member. You all are. How do I know that this isn't some ploy to kick me off?"

"Because it's not."

"Then why didn't you ask us this when Trent was around?"

"It didn't occur to me then, alright. Look, from now on, there are no more Killer Bass or Screaming Gophers. It's just Boys versus Girls. If we don't fight back, we're going down."

"Are you going to start bullying me if I don't join, like what you did to Harold?" I asked.

"Harold!? Oh yes, Harold. That boy was leaving all of his underwear lying around. He deserved it."

"Not sure if he deserved all of it."

"Okay, we may have gone a little overboard with him. Just promise you won't act like a dork and we won't hurt you. Why would I harm you anyway? I want you in our alliance."

"What alliance?" Tyler asked.

Duncan rubbed his forehead. "Look, I'll give you the night to think about it. Just remember that unless you want to leave this island, it would be very beneficial to join."

"I kind of do want to leave this island, but I still want that moola." Geoff said.

"Then I suggest you join." Duncan said, going to bed.

The decision that I had to make would greatly affect my strategy going forward.

Here's to hoping that I make the right choice.

No challenge in this one, but there will be next time.

Or will there? Dun dun dun…

Just kidding, it's hide-and-go-seek time!

6 Chicks: Leshawna, Izzy, Lindsay, Heather, Gwen, Bridgette,

4 Dudes: Duncan, Tyler, Geoff, Noah

Finished:Trent, Eva, Harold, Katie, DJ, Beth, Cody, Courtney, Sadie, Owen, Justin, Ezekiel