Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling.
Therefore, I do not own the Harry Potter universe.
Dracula's Sidekick is mighty sorry Mistress Rowling for dabbling in your world. *Hits head against wall* BAD DRACULA'S SIDEKICK! BAD!
Chapter 37: Learning How to Be Silent
I stared despondently straight ahead, staring out the glass window in the infirmary as my thoughts continued in the same endless loop they'd been in for the past couple of weeks. Each time my thoughts started to stray off that path I'd forcibly do something to move them back onto it.
It had been three weeks since Alexandru was killed.
Three weeks since that ghastly murder.
I'd slept one week of it away under constant Dreamless Sleep; Madame Pomfrey and Dumbledore thought it was the best thing for me.
I'd had several constant visitors in the first couple of days… but they had started to drop off recently when they could see nothing was happening; that nothing was getting through.
I just didn't care anymore.
Sure I felt guilty that I couldn't give them what they were searching for. But if I did it would have only been a lie. I'd always been a terrible liar and if I tried they probably would have seen through it anyway. It wasn't my fault though that they didn't know how to deal with me.
I wasn't in the infirmary for physical injuries; the small cuts and knocks I had gotten were easily fixed. I was in there for internal injuries- ones they couldn't fix with potions or positive thinking. I scared them; they worried about what I would do if I didn't have someone around. I wasn't suicidal. I was just upset.
And mind bogglingly angry.
I hated them.
Hated them with every fiber of my being.
Not the Hogwarts staff or my friends no. It wasn't them. It was those Death Eater scumbags. I wanted them dead. I wanted all of them dead. I wanted their families to feel what I was feeling, though I doubted that they were as close with any kin as I was, or had been rather.
I was also severely pissed with the Ministry.
The bastards didn't believe one word that came from my mouth.
No matter how many times I told my story, no matter how many times I begged for them to believe me, no one did. They thought it was all made up; that I'd confused the situation as a way to escape from the pain. They didn't believe that we were attacked by Death Eaters. The bodies had disappeared before they had arrived.
They thought I was mad.
They didn't even set up a crime scene.
Alexandru's body was stuck in transit; the Ministry was holding it until they figured out what to put down on his death certificate, plus they had to validate his identity with the Romanian Ministry and then had to confirm it with several apprentices. My Grandparents even stepped in. Both managed to get themselves somehow to the Ministry and had ended up in a massive argument with the fellow in charge of the Deaths and Registrations office.
My grandmother was distressed that we couldn't give AV the proper funeral he deserved.
I found out from Dumbledore that what Alexandru had told me in his last moments was true; he had terminal cancer. He'd known the entire time he was training me that no treatment- muggle or Wizarding- could have helped him. The cancer was too far along. Dumbledore had said he would have had 5 months at the most before he would have died. That's why he had always been in pain, why he was so pre-occupied with his own death.
Poor Fawkes the phoenix was heartbroken. I didn't know what to do with him. Phoenix's were incredibly loyal creatures and I knew that it'd be hard to find him another owner. He seemed content to stay around the grounds though and quickly became won over by Dumbledore. Dumbledore was just as fascinated with him and I gladly bequeathed him Fawkes.
The door to the infirmary swung open and a whole chorus of raised voices suddenly barraged in on me. I turned my head to look, the numbness allowing a feeling of confusion to creep in. There was a large group of people fighting with Madame Pomfrey to be let in and she was doing everything she could to prevent them from entering. Some of their conversation reached me.
"Please Madame you have to let us in! This is of vital importance!" I heard Alice say, begging Madame Pomfrey. "NO." Madame Pomfrey declared firmly, "Absolutely not! I refuse to let in such a large group making such a large amount of noise. My patients need absolute silence!" She declared in a harsh hiss.
"But there's one patient who's currently going mad in it. She needs us to distract her from herself before she self-destructs," protested Jen. Steam seemed to pour from Madame Pomfrey's ears. "No! In case you all have forgotten, Miss MacKay rarely speaks to anyone. Including you. What makes you think she will speak to you now?" Madame Pomfrey declared, full of righteous anger.
"Because things have changed. What we're about to tell her is something she's been invested in for a long time." Will insisted and my curiosity sparked. It was the first burst of strong feeling I'd had in a while and I tilted my head to the side examining it for a moment; savoring it. The feeling of detachment was still there, as was the grief. But I could feel things; emotions were coming back to me.
They were faint, hidden from me. But they were there.
Suddenly Dumbledore's voice came in and from the look of him he'd just arrived on the scene. "What seems to be the problem here Madame Pomfrey?" He asked cheerfully, though his eyes were slightly wary. How I could tell at that distance was beyond me, but I did know. Madame Pomfrey looked slightly relieved to see Dumbledore.
"Headmaster" she said, her voice sounding grateful, "I was just trying to explain to the students that Miss MacKay is ill and I refuse to let her be disturbed. Such a large group at one time is bound to upset her." She said, fully expecting Dumbledore to back her up. Dumbledore shocked her and me with his next words.
"I disagree Madame. I sent the students here. In fact all of us, even I, are here to talk to Miss MacKay about a matter of a delicate nature and I think that now is the perfect time to discuss it with her." Dumbledore said, his voice calm yet carrying ultimate authority. Madame Pomfrey was shocked into silence. There was the shuffling of feet and I saw Dumbledore try to move around Madame Pomfrey before she blocked him.
"I'm sorry Headmaster I must insist-" She began but was cut off by Dumbledore. "No forgive me Madame, but this is a matter of urgency. I shall require complete privacy. No one enters or exits the infirmary until this conversation has ended. Oh, though do let in Professor Snape when he comes around shortly." Dumbledore said, striding purposefully past Madame Pomfrey, my friends trailing triumphantly after him.
They reached my bed quickly and immediately settled in around me, Dumbledore Conjuring chairs for everyone. I sat there, my eyes darting around at their faces confused. I felt myself begin to shrink in, like I always did in the company of others. My hands twisted the clean, white, stiff sheets anxiously and I fidgeted, feeling sloppy in my hospital issued bed clothes. I got sympathetic looks from everyone and it was quiet for a long time, no one wanting to speak first.
I hadn't spoken more than a 'yes' or a 'no thank you' in weeks and so to speak then frightened me. I bit my bottom lip and began to pray someone would start the conversation. Dumbledore eventually cracked seeing me become jumpy. "Good afternoon Miss MacKay. How are you feeling this evening?" he asked me.
I didn't know how to answer; what he wanted me to say. "Fine" I croaked, hardly recognizing my own voice. Every one of my friends flinched and I knew there must have been something wrong with my expression. I worked to try and make it look normal but I suspect I failed epically.
I tried to take my cue from Alice, who was sitting close by my left side; tried to learn from her expression how mine should look, but it seemed her blank expression and silence was a replica of mine. Everyone seemed keen to learn how to be silent from me.
I relaxed a bit. Not much, but at least we had moved now into familiar territory. I was okay with this awkwardness; I knew how situations like these went. I'd become an expert in them since that day. Nothing much was expected of me here. I only had to sit here and be silent while they tried to make a one sided conversation.
Dumbledore seemed to realize that I probably wouldn't say anything more until the end of the visit so he plowed on, getting to the gist of the matter. "I suppose you are wondering why we are all here?" He offered and I inclined my head slightly in agreement. He continued. "Well, I've been talking with your friends and we all agree that more action needs to be done and immediately to secure the Prophecy in a better place." He explained his voice soft.
I immediately stiffened, my whole body radiating tension as I felt something crack in my perfectly blank façade. Jen and Alice saw the utter terror in my eyes and immediately moved closer, Alice grabbing my hand and squeezing it with Jen placing her hand on top of Alice's. The doors suddenly swung open then banged shut; the noise had me leaping 20 feet in the air and a startled cry escaping from my mouth.
Snape was stalking towards us and he sent an apologetic look towards me before conjuring his own chair and sinking down into it. It was silent for a bit as I tried to calm my racing heart. I sucked in a deep breath and the fight or flight instinct slowly began to fade away. I slumped back into my pillows, suddenly exhausted. Snape cleared his throat and said calmly "Continue, please."
Nodding once Dumbledore began to speak again. "I feel the best place for us to hide it would be at the Ministry of Magic." Dumbledore said and Snape gave a snort, clearly showing his opinion on the idea. Dumbledore ignored him and continued. "Once there, it will be charmed so that only the person as to whom it's about may take it." Dumbledore explained.
Everyone fell quiet, waiting to see what my opinion was of that plan. I had to pause to think on it. Whether I liked the idea of the prophecy falling into Ministry hands or not was irrelevant, it was a smart idea. The protections it would have there would far outweigh the potential ones we could give it. It'd be away from human error and away from potential passersby stumbling across it.
But could I agree with it if I knew about what could potentially happen? J.K Rowling had made it all too clear in 'The Order of the Phoenix' what could happen in the future. Should I take active steps to prevent that?
Or did it need to happen?
Was it necessary for future success?
It was a hard decision and one I didn't really want to make. It wasn't my place. I wasn't a leader. I was a foot soldier. What gave me the right to make decisions like this?
I looked quickly around at Will, Colin, Ivy, Jen and Alice's faces. They'd all made their decision and their opinions, but from that quick cursory glance I couldn't tell what they had actually decided. I swallowed nervously and looked back at Dumbledore's expectant face. I sighed and it seemed too loud in the sudden silence.
Finally, I looked back at Dumbledore and nodded and his eyes sparked and he looked clearly happy with my decision. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jen and Ivy exchange disappointed glances; it was clear they had both decided they didn't want it to go to the Ministry. I briefly chanced a look at Snape and our eyes met. He seemed unhappy but resigned; he knew it was the right thing to do but clearly wasn't happy about it.
Dumbledore broke the silence again. "So now we just need to decide who shall deliver the Prophecy into Ministry custody." He said, serious. He looked pointedly around the circle of the Order. They all shifted nervously and it was clear none of them wanted to be the unfortunate bearer. I shifted in the hospital bed, wriggling a bit to get more comfortable.
That odd voice which often gave me wise bits of advice decided to speak up. Say something, it urged. I ignored it. Snape suddenly cleared his throat. "I'll do it." He declared, his expression determined. "No one will expect me to be carrying it. It will be the perfect ploy." He explained. Dumbledore didn't look sure and opened his mouth to protest when Will spoke up.
"But the Death Eaters are too close to you. As a spy people are going to look at you suspiciously for anything." Will said bravely, then seemed to nod to himself and looked straight at Dumbledore. "I'll do it." He said confidently. "You?" Snape sneered, looking outraged at the idea. "You'd misplace it before your journey began, idiot boy. You couldn't handle the responsibility." Snape jeered.
Will looked like he'd been slapped across the face. "Now wait a minute Professor-" Will began and suddenly the whole room burst into chaos, everyone yelling over top of each other. Everyone was shouting to get their opinion heard and accusations and insults were being traded at a million miles an hour.
It felt like a cheese grater was being dragged across my brain and I knew hexes would probably been thrown soon. I clutched my ears, trying to block out the noise and begging some noiseless and unknown deity to return the room back to the blissful silence I was used to, that I needed. They weren't listening to me and the shouting seemed to grow impossibly further in volume, everyone standing now as they bellowed at each other. Even Dumbledore was yelling.
Suddenly a burst of anger rolled through me, blazing hot. Grabbing my wand off my bedside table where it had sat untouched the whole time I'd been in the infirmary I cast a 'Sonorus' charm and pointed the tip of my wand to my throat. "WILL EVERYONE JUST SHUT UP!" I bellowed. The charm made sure my voice was heard above everyone else and everyone was so shocked by how loud it was and the fact I had just said more than one word that they immediately shut up.
I breathed a sigh of relief and canceled the spell, sitting my wand calmly on the covers of the bed. "Thank you." I said quietly, exhausted again. They all looked abashed, angry and somewhat baffled. Dumbledore just looked plain hopeful that I was better. "Sit down please." I urged when they just kept staring at me.
They all obeyed and I briefly wondered why. It's because you're a Queen now. As Dragon Keeper you've earned their respect, said the wise voice in my head, piping up again. I hated that voice and decided to ignore it again. I swallowed and looked around at their faces, then before I realized what I was doing, I was speaking again and when the words had exited my mouth I felt horrified at what I had just said.
"I'll do it." I said and I barely recognized my own voice. They all stared at me open mouthed now. Fuck, what have you done?! I yelled at myself in my head. But in the quiet that followed, I realized that I really did want to do it. I had to. I couldn't explain why, but I knew it was something I had to do.
"What?!" Alice chocked dismayed. I turned to Dumbledore and looked him straight in the eye, determined. "I said I'll do it. I want to. I want to finish what I started." I said, my voice cold but resolute. Dumbledore said nothing, just stared at me but I was sure I saw pride in his eyes. Suddenly Snape was on his feet.
"No! Absolutely not! You aren't well! Your decision has been clouded by grief and it's too dangerous for you out there!" He growled, and he looked as though he wanted to shake some sense into me. I turned and looked at him and I felt my blank face disappear for the first time. I didn't know what my expression was but it unnerved him.
"No." I said to him, forcibly. "I have to do this." I said determined. He went to say something more but I held up a hand and he quieted. "No please listen to me." I begged, closing my eyes and knowing what I was about to say wouldn't be received well but it had to be said. "I need this. I need to do something, anything. I'm going out of my mind. This is what Alexandru-" I said, swallowing sickly as I struggled to say his name around the lump in my throat "would have wanted. I need to protect my tribe." I said, confident.
Alice frowned and went to speak but I managed to speak before her. "You are my tribe. All of you. I consider you all family." I said and each one of them immediately swallowed their protests. They looked touched by the statement. "I was born for this. This is my purpose; to protect my family. I-I… I haven't been doing that. I've failed you all so far." I said, a small sob escaping as I hung my head.
They all began to protest but I held up a hand and they fell silent again. Sniffling and swiping at a tear which had escaped I looked up at them, my expression determined again. There was nothing that could change my mind and I think they could see that. "This is me trying to rectify my inaction." I said, clearing my throat.
Turning to Dumbledore I knew there was no going back now. "What's the plan?"
Holy Crumpet Muffins!
It was Hot!
Unbearably.
Unfathomably.
No words in the English or Romanian Dictionary were currently forming in my mind to aid me in finding a more suitable way to describe the heat. Hell, even Alice who made up half her words to suit her situation wouldn't be able to come up for a word on this heat.
How this heat was even possible in Mid-April astounded me. April in Australia was supposed to be cold!
I felt sort of like a traitor to my homeland. For months I had been longing for this sort of heat, praying for it to come to England. But my prayers had been evaded. Now, here I was, finally home for a few hours and I was wishing for the cold weather I so detested.
Augh! I was turning British!
I wiped away the thin sheen of sweat from my forehead, apologizing to the angry sun. Squinting, I covered my eyes with my hand and looked out over the shimmering and smoggy harbor. Even the water looked as if it was sweating. I didn't blame it. Al Gore was right; this shit was Global Warming!
Perhaps this was it! Perhaps 2012 was the end of the world. Death by heat wave. How creative. I certainly hadn't expected that end. Oh sure I had known I had 80-90% of being bumped off that day by a bunch of Death Eaters or hell, maybe the man I was waiting for would flip out and go on some mass murder streak or something.
Pulling my head back into the game I took a better look at my surroundings, trying to be a good little girl and be vigilant. Always on the lookout. Being prepared.
It pissed me off slightly that was the climate I now found myself in; constant danger. The Death Eaters who had slaughtered Alexandru were still out there, probably waiting for me to slip up and deliver myself into their hands like a sitting duck. That's what I felt like at that moment; dead meat.
Behind me, cars whined by furiously, blowing gusts of hot air on my back which only served to make the oppressive heat worse. A train rushed past, honking its horn obnoxiously as it devoured the tracks and swallowed them with metallic clinks. Tall buildings with company logos slapped on their tops rose up on either side of the bridge looking like a child had randomly placed them there. They were all competing to see who could get the highest.
Capitalism reigned supreme, even on a day like this.
How comforting.
The sounds of the city were suffocating, even here on the bridge where one was slightly removed from all the madness. A few tourists walked past me, cameras snapping every millisecond, jabbering away in their native tongues as they bounced around like two year olds. A few waved at me, happy to see a local 'authentic' Australian in their travels that day around the iconic city.
Sydney Harbor.
The ultimate tourist destination.
I mean yeah, sure, it was beautiful and a most welcome change from all the greens and browns which had consumed me in England, but it was a commonality. The excitement was sort of lost on me. Maybe because of my Australian heritage, and the fact that I had been in Sydney so many times it should be illegal, I was now exempt from the pandemonium associated with 'being' there. Sure I still felt some mild awe at the amazing ability of the human race to create a complete city from the ground from concrete, glass and metal but it seemed normal.
The situation though was anything but.
There were yachts and ferries and even the occasional touring boat leisurely floating around the famous bay. It looked so relaxing, the water so blue! I wished I could join them, leave behind the grief, the madness and the stress. But no, I had to stay here. I had to complete my mission.
I still couldn't figure out why I had volunteered to do this. Perhaps because I was so numb, the prospect of adrenaline and adventure lured me out of my black mind full of mourning. I wasn't sure though, my previous reasons and thought processes were either gone or not making sense any more.
The fact that this trade off was happening in the middle of the pedestrian walkway on the Harbor Bridge still bothered me. It was a little too conspicuous for my liking. Will and Jen hadn't liked it either. But everyone else insisted that it was so overt it was covert; it was too obvious, too simple. The Death Eaters would be expecting sneakier tactics and us to choose a more discrete place.
A nagging memory again pushed itself to the forefront of my mind and brought with it a familiar set of panicked thoughts.
You shouldn't be here. You should be back at school, safe within the school wards. Argued an annoying voice in my head. I desperately wanted to listen to it, but I had spent too much time, effort and worry on this plan already to just abandon it.
I can't. I argued back to the voice in my head. I made Dumbledore a promise I wouldn't let it fall into the wrong hands. I've got to hand it over to the Ministry. It's safer there. But that annoying voice wasn't giving up easily this time. It brought in something which made me sick to my stomach.
Remember Anna. Remember how Alina died. You're doing almost exactly the same thing she did. Get out now while you've still got a chance. Do you want your remains to end up scattered through some Sydney street? Another funeral for your family to deal with? It spat, trying to get me to see reason.
I felt the blood drain from my face and swallowed the bile which rose up my throat. Shit, the annoying voice in my head was right! I was on a noble crusade just like Alina; doing what I thought was necessary to save the ones I most cared about. Doing it alone. I had gotten the freaky letter like she had, and yet I was blindly walking into real danger without as much as a thought.
I was eighteen… like her. It was mid-April…
I looked down at my watch and wanted to burst into tears. Why hadn't I checked the date? Why hadn't I remembered?
The 14th of April 2012.
Alina was murdered by an unknown assailant who had been plaguing the tribe for a few weeks on the 14th of April 1822.
I was more desperate than ever to get out of there as soon I could. I flipped my red hair back over my shoulder anxiously. What in the Devil's name was taking him so long?
Footsteps reached me then, and they didn't sound like an average set of footsteps one would assume would be present on the bridge. I didn't have to look to know this was the man I was waiting for. Pulling down temporarily my mental barrier which prevented thoughts from bombarding me, I reached out and confirmed that yes; this was the man I was waiting for.
He stopped a few steps from me and followed my cue, leaning against the railing of the walkway and looked out at the sizzling city. "Nice day, is it not Minister?" I asked calmly, my face not betraying anything out of place. "Indeed," he replied promptly, his clipped British voice a welcome relief to my rambling manic thoughts. Silence descended for a few minutes as we waited for some unknown cue to signal it was safe to proceed.
"Do you have it?" The Minister asked, breaking the silence. His voice was strained, anxious. I turned my head slightly to look at the man I had only seen before in the papers. Cornelius Fudge, the Minister of Magic. No one at Hogwarts trusted him, making what I was about to do probably a horrid idea. But the Order's hands were bound. It needed to be placed somewhere with adequate defenses.
"Yes." I said, in the same calm voice I had greeted him with. He nodded absently, his eyes scanning the perimeter. He was clearly nervous without his usual entourage of Aurors and body guards. He was alone, in an effort to be inconspicuous. His guard was presently across the city, at a Wizarding Convention in Manly, trying to lead possible assailants on a goose chase. Hopefully our decoy had worked.
Reaching into the pocket of my denim cut off shorts, I pulled out a cloth bag, the bottom bulging with the round, ball-like object sitting safely in the bottom of the bag. He took the bag eagerly, quickly undoing the draw strings and peeking in the bag to see if the promised item was in there as negotiated. It was, and he smiled an odd sort of smile before he quickly tucked the bag into an inner pocket in his suit jacket.
The Minister had traded his robes for a clean pressed suit, in another effort to better fit in with the Muggles. The CBD was full of men and women in suits and once he melded into their crowd when he left the bridge, he would be virtually untraceable. I was wearing my usual muggle clothes, having never really changed my wardrobe when I entered the Wizarding world; my denim shorts and a loose fitting purple t-shirt made me look like an average, run of the mill teenager.
But it was done now. All over. The burden had been passed.
All we could do now was wait until the Minister reached the safety of the British Ministry and deposited the crystal ball to the Unspeakables in the Department of Mysteries. Only there when it would be placed on a shelf in a Labyrinth of other prophecies would it be deemed completely safe.
The Minister seemed to realize the urgency of his return to London, and snapped in to action. With no further words or acknowledgements he turned on his heel and walked back the way he came from, traveling towards the large Suncorp building in the distance. Disappearing into the shade of the trees, he quickly and effortlessly rejoined the small dots of commuters as they strolled busily through the city streets.
Waiting the agreed amount of time, it was then my turn to leave.
Tearing my eyes from the harbor and the little hub of life surrounding it, I turned in the opposite direction to the Minster and made my way across the bridge. I too easily slipped back into the crowds and became a wall flower in the cityscape, making my way through the streets towards my next intended goal.
Central Station.
Walking into one of the underground entrances, I made my way through the underground rabbit warren of walk ways until I reached a set of stairs leading up to the Platforms above the ground. The 'Country' Platforms stretched out in front of me, mainly sparse from crowds because of the hour of the day.
Platform 14 was blissfully vacant of a train and passengers. I walked down the concrete stretch, my gaze directed towards a little screen which told me I had 10 minutes to wait until the next train came. Good.
To any Muggles watching me, I was walking straight for a large metal Pylon. But to witches and wizards familiar with the sparse layout of the Australian Wizarding community, I was heading towards a back entrance of the Wizarding underground. There was a network of tunnels and portals which would allow me to journey to any Wizarding community across the world.
But I never reached the pole.
I was hit with a stunning curse before I even realized I was being followed.
My last thoughts before the blackness took me were simple really. I saw a flash of red spell light, and then realized the masked man was a Death Eater before I was out like a light. I didn't even have a chance to raise my wand.
Shit.
A/N: OHHHHHHHHH MY GOD! I have been waiting to post this chapter for what seems like ages. I wrote the last half almost a year ago and it's just been casually sitting there in my computer hard drive waiting to be unleashed on the world.
I know alot of people liked the Preface from way back in December 2010... here it is! It's come back to haunt you!
I hope now you know alot about Ileana and what object I was refering to way back then hopefully it makes alot of sense now.
What's going to happen to Ileana? Well, you're just going to have to wait now until the next chapter huh? Lucky I wrote that chapter months ago... *evil laugh*