CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
PART THREE: END OF WEEK TWELVE
WEDNESDAY
24 DECEMBER, 2003
DAY FIVE WITHOUT TEDDY
It was after ten in the morning and they were in bed, having a lie-in. If it could be called a lie-in, considering she spent most of every day in bed. He'd taken the week off, using his holiday time, though of course, being the Minister for Magic, there was no real time off – he was still needed, and they could still reach him. But unless there was an emergency that required his presence, he was staying home.
"How are we supposed to have Christmas?" Andromeda asked Kingsley. "It won't be Christmas without him."
"I don't know."
He held her and stroked her hair and let her cry into his pajama shirt, as he had every morning since they'd lost custody of her grandson. She was barely functioning, but she wasn't drinking or getting high, and that had to count for something.
Dorcas was doing her best to be helpful, cooking the meals Andromeda had been teaching her, making sure her 'unofficially adoptive' mother ate at least once per day (more if she could manage it), and caring for the cat. She'd been the one to gather Teddy's favorite books and toys and clothes to send to Grimmauld Place with Kreacher on Saturday, while Andromeda and Kingsley were with Healer Smelthwick in the sitting room. She also took charge of the laundry, the shopping (not that there was much they needed to buy), and the cleaning. She was a little Andromeda.
Kingsley spent most of his time tending to Andromeda personally, holding her, carrying her into the shower and washing her hair, sometimes even spoon feeding her soup when she was too weak and despondent to eat. He and Dorcas, and sometimes Neville, shared quiet dinners together every night while Andromeda was asleep. Though she was not permitted to have potions in her possession for fear of overdose, Healer Smelthwick had recommended both Calming Draughts and Dreamless Sleep, which Kingsley administered as needed. He also read to her and encouraged her to get up and move every couple of hours, even if it was just to get a Coke from the kitchen or stretch her legs in the hall. Though it hadn't yet been a week, he was worried she'd atrophy if he let her do nothing but stay in bed hiding under the blankets, hating herself.
He'd never seen her so bad off.
And, frankly, he didn't know what to do.
Healer Smelthwick came on Saturday, returned on Monday, and was due back again today, even though it was Christmas Eve. When she arrived, it was nearly seven o'clock. She apologized for her tardiness, but the holidays were always a difficult and busy time at the facility. While most long-term patients wished they could be anywhere else, suicide attempts leading to emergency admittances of new patients were up.
Kingsley was alone in the living room. He'd been looking over Ministry paperwork that couldn't wait until after the holiday. Andromeda was asleep upstairs with Dorcas sitting by her bed, reading one of her textbooks.
"Could we speak privately, before waking her?" asked Healer Smelthwick. Kingsley said yes, of course, and invited her into the kitchen for tea. Dorcas had a stew simmering. All he had to do was pop bread in the oven at quarter-to eight.
"That smells delicious," said Adelaide as she added a lump of sugar to her tea. "Tell me, how have the last two days been?"
"The same," he answered. He went on to describe Andromeda's despondence, her unwillingness to care for herself, her inability to function at even the most basic level. Her never-ending tears, alternating with a state that seemed almost comatose.
"I think she's had a bit of a break," the Healer said sympathetically. "Honestly, I wouldn't be opposed to re-admitting her to the facility – I think she needs more help than outpatient services can provide – but I'm afraid doing so would negatively impact any appeal the two of you make, so I'm reluctant unless there is a chance she's going to hurt herself."
"We've kept watch over her, as you requested," he said quickly.
"I'm sure you have. And I hated to ask that you and Dorcas mind her like a child, but I don't feel she should be left alone at the time being. I haven't seen her in such a terrible state since she arrived in the facility at the end of April, though at that time she was still detoxing and much angrier. She might even be worse now. At least she had fire in her then."
"I remember," he said.
"And you know, I generally wouldn't discuss her condition with you, especially when she's not present, but I have… concerns."
"Concerns?"
"It's as if she's not all there, Kingsley." Adelaide gestured for him to sit at the table, then settled across from him. "I think the hearing itself was almost as damaging as the result. She was reminded of the last time she had to testify, which was traumatic, and the first time, after she was arrested and sent to Azkaban, a situation we never discuss, but I suspect affected her more than we realized. I didn't know any of that about Ted, nor did she tell me much about the time she was tortured, and I cannot understand how it never came up in one of our sessions. She must have purposely suppressed it or kept it from me so we wouldn't have to discuss, but talking about it on Friday brought it bubbling up to the surface. She's had to be strong all these years because of Teddy. Even when she was at her weakest, she was strong, and now, faced with the danger of losing him permanently, I worry she's giving up."
He drummed his fingers on the table, taking this all in. He'd tried to talk to her about Ted on Sunday, but she'd immediately shut him down and he hadn't wanted to push her.
"How do I help?"
"For now, continue to stay with her. Or have Dorcas stay with her. If she's alone in her bedroom or the shower, first make certain there's nothing there with which she can hurt herself. No razors or knives. No alcohol, obviously. No potions, except what you administer. I might even take her wand. I saw the little marks on her arm. She's been digging her fingernails into her skin. And I know she's been pulling out her hair again. I worry she'll do worse if given the opportunity. I know her sister used to burn herself; I don't want Andromeda getting the same idea."
"Narcissa isn't allowed here at the present."
"Is that for the best for Andromeda?" asked the Healer. "Or is that because you're still angry?"
"Both."
Healer Smelthwick sighed into her tea.
"You don't agree?"
"I honestly don't know. I've grown quite fond of Andromeda, as you're aware, and I want to see her surrounded by those who love her at this time, but I also share your concerns about Narcissa's actions as of late." She took a long sip of the hot liquid. "Between us, I wouldn't be opposed to having Narcissa returned to the facility either. She was one of my patients about three or four years ago. And knowing she not only indulged recently, but convinced her sister to do so with her, concerns me on several levels."
"I'd rather not talk about Narcissa."
Narcissa had tried to speak with Andromeda several times since learning the news about Teddy from Hermione (who heard it from Dorcas) but thus far Kingsley had refused to let her into the home, even closing their fireplace to the Floo Network to avoid sudden visits. The Healer had had to apparate to the nearest safe point and walk the rest of the way, as would any other potential visitor.
"About Teddy, then. Has she seen him?"
"No." Kingsley frowned. This angered him, too. "Potter says he thinks it's too soon. The boy needs to 'settle in' first. And then he wants visits to be supervised. He requested someone be Ministry-appointed, as if she's a danger to the boy." Kingsley clenched his fists too tightly around his mug. "I'm the bloody Minister for Magic and that boy wants to place one of my employees in my home to monitor interactions between my girlfriend and her own grandchild."
"How does that make you feel?"
"No need to discuss my feelings. I'm not your patient anymore," he said, more harshly than he meant to. She simply shook her head and sipped some more. He took several deep breaths to calm down before speaking again.
"I'm sorry. I appreciate everything you've done for both of us. I'm overtired and tense. I don't mean to take it out on you."
"If it helps you to snap at me, go right ahead," she said, without a hint of upset. "I can take it."
He half-smiled. She truly was an excellent Healer.
"I filed an appeal this morning, before Andromeda was awake. Dorcas was here, though, and knew I'd gone." He ran his index finger around the rim of his mug. "We'll get him back, somehow."
"Not like this, I'm afraid." Healer Smelthwick shook her head wearily. "Andromeda is in no fit state to raise him at the moment and I don't know that a successful appeal will be enough to turn her around. She was deeply wounded by the decision, not only because she lost him, but because it confirmed her greatest fear, one she harbored long before Teddy was in her care."
"That she's an unfit mother."
"Precisely."
"Do you think she's an unfit mother, Healer?" Kingsley met her eye.
Neither of them spotted Andromeda hovering in the doorway.
"I think one of the most incredible things she's ever done was to kiss Teddy on Friday and tell him he would love staying with the Potters. She smiled and spoke positively and acted as though it would be a great adventure. She didn't let him see how broken she was by the decision, which would have compounded his trauma. She was strong for him in a way that only a mother could be. I wish the partial Wizengamot had seen that."
"You think she can do it, then? Raise Teddy? You think we can do it?"
"As much as I'm fond of Andromeda personally, I wouldn't have testified that I thought he belonged with the two of you if I didn't genuinely believe it was the best thing for him. And I'll do whatever I can to help her through this so you can get him back."
"Thank you," said Andromeda softly. She was leaning against the door frame, still in the pajamas she'd put on after a shower the morning before. Her hair was a tangled mess and there were dark bags under her red, irritated eyes.
"Andromeda!" Kingsley hopped up to help her, as if she couldn't walk independently to the table. She waved him away and moved toward the end, with her Healer and her partner to either side of her.
"I told Dorcas to take a shower. Neville is coming for dinner and she looks awful. I promised her I'd come straight down here. I heard what you said." She tried to smile at Adelaide, but tears were already forming. "I didn't want Teddy to be afraid. That's why I told him they would take good care of him. I didn't want him to…"
"It's alright," Kingsley assured her. "You did the right thing."
"I've lost all of my children," she said quietly as she sat. "I aborted two, my sister murdered one, and, now, my last one has been taken away."
"Your last one is upstairs, in the shower," said Kingsley, standing behind her and giving her shoulders a squeeze (while ignoring that she said she'd aborted two, which was twice as many as she'd previously told him about). "And I promise we'll get Teddy back, even if we have to kidnap him and move to Australia."
"I don't think that will be necessary," said Healer Smelthwick with an eye-roll. "Now that you're awake, Andromeda, should we get started with your session?"
Andromeda nodded.
"I'm ready."
That night, after the Healer had gone and Andromeda had shed a few more tears than she thought she had left in her, they shared a quiet dinner with Dorcas and Neville.
"It's Christmas Eve," moped Andromeda, poking at her stew. "On Christmas Eve, I always perform for Teddy 'A Christmas Carol.'" Her nose twitched. She tugged at a few strands of her hair. "Oh, Neville, your grandmother – we invited her for dinner tomorrow, and I haven't… I didn't prepare. I make roast goose. It's the only time of year I do. Is your grandmother-?"
"My gran said if you want, she'll come cook. She doesn't want you to have to worry about it." Neville set down his water and glanced quickly at Dorcas before looking back at Andromeda. "Gran also says she thinks Harry's making a mistake. She says my aunt and uncle tried to take me after… my parents… you know. What happened. But she refused to let them."
Andromeda felt a surge of guilt, even though she was no more responsible for her sister's torture of the Longbottoms than she was her sister's murder of her daughter.
"It didn't go to the Wizengamot, but she fought with Aunt Mabel and Uncle Addams. Aunt Mable is my mum's older sister. They have kids around my age. Few years before me at Hogwarts. Aunt Mabel thought she would be a better mum for me than Gran, they had a massive row over it and didn't talk for a few years, but Gran said she knew then that she was the best parent for me and she knows now that you're the best for Teddy. She also thinks Harry means well, just like Aunt Mabel did, but he's all wrong about it."
"You were raised by your grandmother, Neville," said Kingsley slowly, as if this had just occurred to him. "You must know… there must be… Teddy has some… challenges. He's asked to call Andromeda 'mum' and wants me to be his father. He wants a brother. He has some anger issues."
He shrugged nonchalantly. "I was angry sometimes. Sad. I hated that I couldn't remember my parents before they were the way they are now. When I was six, I told my mum I wished she was normal. I… er…" Neville shifted in his seat and dropped his gaze. "I shouted it at her and she cried. I don't know if she knows who I am or if she knew what I'd said… what I meant… but I think I scared her with my shouting and she cried. I felt awful about it for weeks, but the next time I saw her she was just the same. Not really there. Handing me gum wrappers. I don't think she remembered."
"Neville and his gran visit them on Christmas every year at St. Mungo's," said Dorcas, reaching over to take his hand. "He asked me to go with them tomorrow afternoon. If that's… alright? May I go?"
"Of course," said Andromeda. "You can go wherever you'd like with Neville. You don't have to ask our permission."
"Oh." Dorcas and Neville exchanged a glance. "In that case, you wouldn't mind if we go to Paris for New Year's?"
"To Paris?" asked Andromeda as Kingsley said, "Excuse me?"
"To Paris," confirmed Neville. He smiled hopefully. "Dorcas has never been. I thought it might be fun. New Year's Eve and all that."
"All the way there and back in a day?" asked Kingsley.
Dorcas and Neville exchanged another glance. Andromeda chuckled.
"They want to go overnight, Kingsley. For New Year's Eve. As people do. Yes, Dorcas, you may go. Have fun."
"What?" asked Kingsley. "Overnight?"
"Oh, thank you!" Dorcas sprang from her seat to hug Andromeda, who smiled but shooed her back to her chair.
"Thank you," said Neville.
"What?" asked Kingsley again, as if he didn't quite get it. "Overnight? Absolutely not. She's eighteen!"
"They're already having sex, Kingsley, what does it matter if they do it or in Paris?"
His mouth gaped open. "They're already having sex?"
"Just twice," said Neville. Dorcas went pink.
"TWICE?" exclaimed Kingsley.
"As you said, she's eighteen," said Andromeda. "Of age. Of age, plus a year. She hasn't been a virgin for a long time. And it isn't as if we weren't doing the same at that age. By eighteen I was married and you – wasn't your Hogwarts girlfriend pregnant by her age?"
"That's precisely my point," said Kingsley. "Eighteen-years-olds have terrible judgment."
"Which is why we're so glad Neville is twenty-three and therefore beyond the age of terrible judgement!" Andromeda grinned. For the first time since they lost Teddy, she almost felt like herself again… and 'herself' enjoyed watching Kingsley fret over the well-being of their unofficial young 'daughter.'
"Don't know about that," grumbled Kingsley.
"What are you worried about?" pressed Andromeda. "He's not going to hurt her. He's not going to abandon her at the top of the Eiffel Tower. He's not going to-"
"When I was not much younger than he is, I impregnated my girlfriend, couldn't afford to marry her or provide for her, hardly got the chance to know my son, and then lost them both to murderers who wouldn't have targeted them if they weren't at her family's home that night. I couldn't care for them and I didn't protect them. They would both be alive if I hadn't-"
The teasing glint in Andromeda's eye was instantly replaced by one of deep empathy and understanding.
"If you hadn't gotten her pregnant, she still would have been killed while home with her family. She didn't die because you got her pregnant when you were too young to provide for her. She died because the You-Know-Who wanted her entire family dead."
"I'm not going to get Dorcas pregnant," said Neville softly, still holding her hand. "But if something happened and I did, I could afford to provide for her and the child – and, more importantly, we're not in danger now. There's no war. Voldemort is gone."
"There is always another threat lurking on the horizon. Peace is short-lived." Kingsley pressed his fingertips to his temples. "I couldn't save Brighton, I almost lost Andromeda in April, and I don't know what to do about Teddy. I know you mean well, Neville, but if you hurt Dorcas-"
"It's not up to you to save everyone, my love," said Andromeda, reaching across the table to gently brush her fingertips against his cheek. "Let the rest of us take on a bit of responsibility too, won't you?"
"I can protect myself, too, Kingsley," said Dorcas. "I'm learning Defensive spells. I've gotten very good with Protego. Neville, Hermione, and Draco help me practice. I'm going to Hogwarts soon. I'm going to be educated and hard-working and then I'll find a job and make sure I can provide for myself before I have any babies to care for. You don't have to worry about me."
"I can't promise not to hurt her," said Neville. "I've only had two girlfriends before and both times, when we broke up, it hurt." He paused. "Well, it hurt me. And Susan. I don't think Luna noticed. When I told her I thought we should see other people she said, 'Alright then. Living people or dead ones?' and I didn't know what to make of that."
"Luna, the blonde with the Nargles from the engagement party?" Kingsley asked his girlfriend.
Andromeda nodded.
"She was… interesting," he said. "You dated her?"
"Yes," said Neville. "We're still friends. And if Dorcas and I break up, I hope we'll be friends. But it will hurt. Likely. So I can't promise there won't be hurt."
Dorcas chewed her lip. Neville continued.
"But I can promise I'll never intentionally hurt her. I won't hit her or degrade her. I won't be unfaithful to her. I won't disrespect or embarrass her. I wouldn't get her pregnant then abandon her. I don't see how anyone can set out to hurt someone they've loved, even if they don't love them like that anymore."
Kingsley swore under his breath, thinking about the vicious things he'd recently said to Hestia, and the way she'd cried when she asked how he could hurt someone he once loved.
"It is not my intention to hurt you," he'd said.
But he knew, the truth was, he'd been purposely hurtful toward her – hateful, even – on multiple occasions since their summer indiscretion.
He sipped from his water glass. Thinking.
"Neville is still friends with Susan and Luna," reiterated Dorcas, looking at Kingsley as if desperate for his approval. "Isn't that nice? I've met Luna at Grimmauld Place and Malfoy Manor a few times, and we had lunch with Susan and her boyfriend, Terry, a few days ago. If he were the sort to hurt women, I don't think they would still be friends with him."
"Solid point," said Andromeda.
"It's reassuring to hear," said Kingsley. "Very well. You may go to Paris for New Year's Eve. But we expect her back by eleven at night on the first."
Both Neville and Dorcas thanked him, looking relieved, but Andromeda laughed. A real laugh. Her first real laugh in days.
"What's funny?" asked Kingsley.
"For a man who was adamant he didn't want to be a father, you've certainly settled quickly into the role. Tell me, Kingsley, if the boy wants to marry her someday, should he come 'round and ask your permission first?"
"Nonsense," said Kingsley, looking slightly put out. "That's archaic."
But Andromeda had a feeling he wouldn't mind being consulted.
During dessert, Kingsley suggested the four of them play Scrabble, which Andromeda suspected was more because he wanted to keep her distracted and active than because he really wanted to, but she said yes. The game was a good one – Neville made for a surprisingly formidable opponent – but she managed to pull off a win in the end. After this, Dorcas offered to clean up the kitchen and do dishes and Neville said he would help, so Andromeda and Kingsley moved to the sitting room sofa. They settled on either side, her cradling a cup of tea, him reaching for his book. But he'd only read two pages before setting it down on the table and looking her way.
"What?" she asked. She lowered the tea.
"Do you remember the first time I told you I love you?"
"This, again?" Sip.
"We were sitting here. You were holding Hope. Teddy was stretched out across us. They were sick. You'd just finished giving them a bath and changing out of your vomit-spotted clothes."
She rolled her eyes. "I'm sure I smelled lovely."
"I knew then." He didn't take his eyes off her. Her eyes met his.
"Knew what?"
"That I'd never love another woman in the same way. That I'd never before loved a woman in the same way."
"Please." She looked away, reaching for her mug.
She looked a mess tonight. Faded, torn jeans. Oversized Oxford t-shirt. Glasses perched on top of her head. Hair unbrushed.
He thought she was beautiful.
"I knew then that I wanted to marry you."
She stared into her tea. "Stop that."
"I love you."
"Stop."
"Marry me."
"Kingsley-" She set the mug down and turned her upper body to face him, but as it had so many times in the past, a familiar little voice interrupted.
"NANA!"
"Oh." Andromeda clutched her hands to her chest. "I must be losing what little sanity I have left. I hear Teddy."
"NANA!"
"I…" Kingsley's brow furrowed. "I hear him too!"
"NAAANAAA!" Someone pounded at the front door. "NANA, YOU HOME?"
"Teddy!" Both Andromeda and Kingsley leapt up from the couch and hurried into the hall, nearly colliding with Dorcas and Neville coming from the kitchen. Andromeda yanked the door open.
There was her little love, wearing his winter coat, open, over firetruck pajamas with the feet sewn in, his nose bright red with cheeks chapped from the cold. He wore no hat or mittens, and snowflakes had landed in his brown, curly hair.
"Hi, Nana," said Teddy. He held up his arms. In one hand, he held a wand. "Pick me up? I'm cold."
Kingsley glanced up just in time to see the Knight Bus disappear.
"My Teddy!" Andromeda gathered him into her arms and rushed him into the house, hugging him. "You're freezing! Let's get you in the bath, I'll do warming charms, we need to-"
"How did you get here?" asked Kingsley, even though he knew.
"For a stranded witch or wizard!" said Teddy. He handed Kingsley the wand. "I taked the bus before with Dorcas."
"I'm sorry!" said Dorcas quickly, as if this meant she'd done something wrong.
"Why aren't you at Grimmauld Place?" asked Kingsley, following Andromeda up the stairs. She hurried him up to the bathroom. Neville and Dorcas followed, and even Meow-meow joined the procession.
"It's Christmas Eve," said Teddy, as if it should have been obvious. He shivered. "Nana, I'm cold."
Andromeda started filling the tub with warm water – not too hot – and quickly performed wandless drying and warming spells on the little boy's pajamas. She took a towel to his wet hair and pressed a warm flannel to his ruddy cheeks.
"Whose wand is this?" asked Kingsley, holding it up. Teddy ignored him, snuggling closer to his kneeling grandmother, who was reaching one hand into the water to test it. "Young man, I asked-"
"Kingsley, stop interrogating him. We can talk when he's warm."
"The Potters will be in a panic when they discover he's gone," said Kingsley. "Do you reckon they'll check here first? What do you wager they'll accuse us of somehow stealing him from Grimmauld Place?"
"Wasn't at Grimmauld Place," said Teddy. "Harry had to go work and Ginny said she's too tired for me so they taked me to the Burrow. I got that wand from Freddy's aunt Floor."
"Floor?" asked Neville.
"Fleur," said Andromeda. "Right? With the long blonde hair?"
"Like this!" said Teddy, scrunching up his face. His hair went long, straight, and white-blond. He giggled and morphed back to normal. "I feel better now. Nana, I can sleep with you?"
"Let's get you in the bath." She unzipped the one-piece pajamas, slipped down his underpants, and helped him carefully into the tub.
"Were you supposed to be spending the night at the Burrow?" asked Kingsley, still trying to get a handle on the situation. Teddy nodded.
"They had a big party with all the kids and mums and dads 'cept Harry Potter because he had to go to work. All the kids had to go to bed at eight but Ginny said we could go back to Grimmauld Place after Harry got back to the Burrow. I could not sleep in the room with all the kids. I wanted my nana and the story of the three Christmas ghosts so I hided in the bathroom in the cupboard under the sink and when Floora taked her shower I stealed – I mean, I borrowed – her wand from her dress pocket and put on my coat and sneaked outside and put out my wand hand and taked the Knight Bus. Stan Shunpike letted me ride and gived me hot chocolate even though I had no Sickles. He said it's a Christmas present."
"I'm going to the Burrow," said Kingsley, turning.
"No, please!" Andromeda reached for the end of his robe. "Let Teddy stay the night here. We'll bring him back tomorrow."
"We can't let them worry all night. I'm going there now. And I'm going to ask how, in a house full of competent adults, they managed to lose a little boy in the middle of the night in the dark in the snow." Kingsley's face hardened into an expression of anger and bitterness. "We're 'unfit parents' but somehow we managed to never let the boy take the Knight Bus alone in his pajamas. He could have gotten hurt. He could have frostbite. Who knows what could have happened?"
"I'll come with you," said Neville. He hurried out after Kingsley.
"TELL THEM I DON'T WANNA GO BACK!" called Teddy from the tub. Neither Neville nor Kingsley replied. Moments later, the downstairs door creaked opened and slammed shut.
"Don't worry, Teddy," said Andromeda. She pressed the flannel to his cheeks again. "I won't let them take you back tonight. I promise."
"You can't promise that," whispered Dorcas. She knelt beside Andromeda on the floor. "What if they say he has to go back?"
"They can pry him out of my arms while he screams and sobs." She leaned over the edge of the tub to kiss his forehead. "Kingsley's right. He could have been hurt. Anyone could have been on that Knight Bus. What if someone had taken him? Or touched him? Or what if the bus hadn't come and he'd fallen into the snow and frozen to death? What if the wand backfired and left him in the same state as Frank and Alice?" The more Andromeda thought about it, the angrier she was, too. "And why did Ginny tell him he makes her 'too tired'? Why did Harry choose to work on Christmas Eve? There couldn't have been an emergency, Kingsley would have been contacted. Where was Molly when he was slipping out the door? Teddy!" She cupped his face in her hands. "Running away from the Burrow was very dangerous. You should never run away, do you understand? You could have died! If something had happened…" The tears she'd been shedding all week came back full-force. "If anything had happened to you, Teddy… if anything… I can't… my Teddy!"
Dorcas held Andromeda. Teddy folded his arms on the edge of the tub.
"I made you sad, Nana? I thought you'd be happy to see me!"
"I am happy to see you!" She wrapped her arms around him, not caring that she was getting all wet. "But it scares me to think of you lost or hurt. I love you, my Teddy."
"I'm not so cold now. Can I get out?"
She lifted him from the tub, hugging him to her again. Dorcas grabbed a towel and handed it to Andromeda, who wrapped him up and carried him to his bedroom to find new pajamas.
"How about these?" she asked. They had the feet sewn in, too, but these were green, with little penguins wearing red and gold printed scarves all over. They were supposed to have been a present – she bought him new pajamas to wear on Christmas Eve every year – but she couldn't bear to send them to Grimmauld Place with the rest of his things.
"I like the penguins," said Teddy as his nana zipped them. "You can tell me the story now?"
"What story?" asked Dorcas.
"Every year, I use magic and a few puppets Nymphadora made in art class as a child to tell Teddy the story of Ebenezer Scrooge and Tiny Tim."
"And the three ghosts!" Teddy wrapped his arms around Andromeda, who was still kneeling on the floor, facing him. "Past, Present, Future!"
"It's a Muggle tale called 'A Christmas Carol' by Charles Dickens," explained Andromeda. She stood and gathered Teddy into her arms. "Let's wait downstairs for Kingsley. If the Potters say you can stay, we'll do the story before bed, as always."
"I can stay," said Teddy definitely. "You promised!"
Dorcas shot Andromeda a sharp look. Andromeda looked pained.
"We'll see, Teddy."
Meanwhile, at the Burrow…
"No!" Ginny shot up from the table. The extended Weasley family, save for the youngest generation, was gathered around on chairs and benches and stools, drinking hot butterbeer and sharing sweet treats. "Teddy is upstairs, asleep, with all the other children!"
"Is he?" asked Kingsley. He held up Fleur's wand. "Or did he borrow this and take the Knight Bus by himself all the way back to Andromeda's? Did he knock at her door and surprise us? Was he wearing his coat and firetruck pajamas, no hat or mittens?" He tossed the wand on the table. Fleur reached for it.
"I… No!" Ginny looked from him to her mother and back. "He can't have."
"I'll look upstairs," said George. He apparated out of the kitchen. A moment later, he returned with a POP.
"Well?" asked Molly.
"He's gone," said George.
"He's gone," said Kingsley. "How long ago did he leave? For how long was he riding the Knight Bus? Long enough to drink the hot chocolate Stan Shunpike gave him."
"I have to go get him!" Ginny reached for her wand and Accioed her coat.
"Not right now," said Kingsley. "He's in the tub. His body temperature was dangerously low. We're lucky he did not yet show significant signs of frostbite." Kingsley didn't feel at all bad about laying it on thick, increasing her feelings of guilt. Neville, to his credit, didn't say a word.
"I… I'm sorry!" Ginny covered her face for a second, then dropped her hands, making a sound of frustration. "He's a difficult child. And this can't come at a worse time. James Sirius isn't sleeping through the night. I've never flown worse. And I've just learned we're expecting again. I'm exhausted!"
"You're expecting again?" asked Molly. Ginny nodded.
"You're exhausted," said Kingsley, without a hint of sympathy. "You lost him - and he could have died - because you're exhausted?"
"I'm sorry! But I can't do this! I told Harry I can't do this." Fire flashed in Ginny's eyes as guilt gave way to anger. "Yesterday, Teddy hit the baby. Hit him! James was sitting on the floor with his little half-moon pillow, the one that helps him keep his balance, when Teddy ran over and slapped him in the chest! Teddy won't go to bed when we say it's time, he won't shower or bathe alone, he won't eat the food I cook, and he won't stop saying awful words like 'filthy Mudblood' and 'fuck off.' I've told Harry I can't manage him. I can't! I said we should give him back. But he says this behavior is more evidence that Teddy needs to be with us because he says he must have picked this up at home. He thinks we're saving him from a childhood of neglect and abuse and how can I argue against that? But I'm not his mother! I can't be. I have my own child – and another coming – to worry about."
"Sounds like Teddy needs you," said Bill.
"You knew the boy was challenging before you took him," Charlie piped up.
"Harry's just trying to do right by him," added Ron.
"I know." Ginny sighed. "And I love Teddy. But I don't want to raise him. It hasn't even been a week and that boy is ruining my life!"
Everyone in the kitchen looked taken aback by this admission, especially Molly, Kingsley, and, just stepping into the doorway, Harry.
"Ginny?" asked Harry. "How could you say that? He's my godson. He needs us. He needs people to raise him, he needs a good home. He-"
"He had a home, he had people to raise him!" Ginny gestured toward Kingsley. She exhaled loudly. "Yesterday, after he hit James, I spanked him."
Harry's mouth gaped open.
"He cried, of course, and told me his nana never does that. He said she has a Time Away chair for when he's naughty. I reminded him I'd sent him to time out six times already that morning. He told my I'm the worst mummy ever. I think he's right. I thought I was a decent mother until we took him in. Now, I don't know if I can handle more than one child. I don't know if I can handle any child. What if James is like that when he's five? How will I manage? Teddy paints on the walls, he throws toys down the stairs, he gives Kreacher clothes, he tried to flush the fish, we had to hide all the Floo Powder, and I think he's been peeing in one of the potted plants."
"Sounds like he's pretty unhappy at Grimmauld Place," said Neville gently. "What does his Healer say about it?"
"Someone doesn't think he needs a Healer." Ginny glared at Harry. "Someone told her Teddy won't be seeing her anymore. Someone thinks he's also the 'Chosen One' when it comes to parenting."
"Ginny?" Harry was visibly wounded by her words. "I didn't know you were this unhappy."
"I don't want Teddy. I'm sorry, Harry, but it's the truth. I only went along with your petition for custody because I thought we would lose and that would be the end of it! The Partial Wizengamot would determine she was fit and you'd be satisfied. I thought you would go back to being his godfather and not want anything more. I didn't know she was going to go out and get pissed in a pub a week before the hearing! I didn't know one of my Beaters was going to Owl us photographic evidence that made her look like a slag! I didn't know he was going to confess to getting Hestia up the duff! I didn't know we were going to bloody win." She plopped back down in her chair.
"Lower your voice!" snapped Harry. "What if he hears you?"
"Teddy isn't here, Harry," said Molly. "He sneaked out tonight and took the Knight Bus, alone, to Andromeda's house. He's there now."
"What?!" Harry looked to Kingsley for confirmation. "Why didn't you bring him back?"
"Why didn't I – I wasn't the one who lost him, Potter!" Kingsley took a deep breath, determined to remain in control – especially as they had a large audience of Weasleys staring at them. "I gave you and Ginny the courtesy of coming here... I came to return to return Mrs. Weasley's wand." He nodded at Fleur, who glanced down at the wand in her hands. "At which time I informed your wife and her family that the boy was missing, as no one had noticed. When Neville and I departed, Andromeda and Dorcas had Teddy in the tub, trying to slowly warm him without shocking his system. I assume, by now, he's in pajamas, and I believe he would prefer to spend the night – Christmas Eve – at home with his family. If you insist upon continuing with… this… we shall return him to you tomorrow, and see you in front of the Wizengamot when our appeal is heard."
"Teddy hits, swears, and refuses to listen because these are the behaviors he has learned at home," said Harry. "If anything, these last five days have shown me how very much he needs a stable, safe, loving home. I expected the transition to be difficult, but-"
"Had you listened to the testimony of Healer Bonham, you would know that Teddy's behavioral and emotional issues primarily stem from a growing awareness of the circumstances surrounding his parents' deaths, the fear he will lose those close to him, and difficulty understanding why he doesn't have a mother or father while others kids do, as that is unfair – and fairness is a common concern at this age, when children are learning to share and beginning to develop an awareness of justice and inequality." Kingsley stared sternly down at the younger man. "Yes, our actions have caused the boy some difficulties, but he is neither abused nor neglected in our home."
"I had difficulties at that age too, mate," said Neville, moving closer to Harry. "Surprised you didn't. I told my gran I wanted 'real parents,' not my Mum and Dad, and asked if I could call her Mum around other kids so no one would know I didn't have one. She said no. She said I still have parents and should be proud of them, proud for everyone to know who they are and what they did." Neville shrugged. "I used to cry a lot. Have nightmares. Break my toys on purpose and tell Gran a ghoul did it. When I was eight, I ran away to live with Muggles. I said I'd had enough magic. That was right after Great-Uncle Algie almost accidentally drowned me. They used to worry I was a Squib."
"I know you were mistreated by your aunt and uncle and would have preferred to live with your godfather," said Percy. "But that doesn't mean it's the same for Teddy."
"Let the boy spend the night with his grandmother, at least," said George. "It's Christmas Eve."
"She is the only mother he's ever known," said Molly. "Even if she's not in the best state to raise him right now, what harm could one night do?"
"It's Christmas Eve," said Angelina emphatically, echoing her husband.
"He might even be asleep already," said Arthur. "No sense waking the little tyke."
"Take him back tomorrow," said Bill. "Bring him here for dinner. He can play with the other kids then. But we'll all be at our own homes in the morning. Maybe it's best if he is, too."
Harry searched the faces of the Weasleys and their spouses, who were all nodding. He was clearly outnumbered.
"Ginny?" he asked.
"I think you know how I feel," she said, almost apologetically.
He heaved a sigh.
"Very well. Tell Andromeda he may stay the night. But tomorrow…"
"Four-thirty," said Molly, smiling at Kingsley. "You're welcome to join us for dinner, too. All of you."
"One of us will drop him here at four-thirty," said Kingsley. "Thank you for the invitation, Molly, but we have guests coming for dinner."
"Oh!" Molly seemed surprised, but she quickly recovered. "Four-thirty, then. We look forward to seeing him then. Don't we, Ginny?"
Ginny sent her mother a withering glare, but she forced a half-smile onto her face and nodded. "Of course."
Kingsley reached out a hand. Harry shook it.
"Goodnight, then," said Kingsley, heading for the door.
"Goodnight," said Neville, following.
The extended Wealsey family called out their goodnights, too, and it was not long before Kingsley and Neville had returned to the Tonks home.
Andromeda was seated on the couch, cradling a warm, dry, pajama-clad Teddy in her arms like an overlarge baby. He was sucking his first two fingers.
"Well?"
"He can stay the night," said Kingsley. "We'll return him tomorrow afternoon."
"Oh, good!" Dorcas appeared at the bottom of the stairs, having just changed into her own pajamas. She hugged Neville.
"It's very late, Teddy," said Andromeda, hugging him tightly to her. "Do you want to sleep or should I tell you the story of Tiny-"
"Three ghosts!" shouted Teddy.
"Upstairs, then." She carried him. Kingsley turned to Neville and Dorcas.
"Care to join? It's an excellent performance."
The young couple smiled, held hands, and said "sure" in unison.
Andromeda, filled with extra vigor and more Christmas cheer than she'd thought she could possibly muster this year, sat Teddy in his bed, gathered her puppets, and drew her wand. She dimmed the lights and waved her wand. The shadow of a headstone appeared on Teddys's wall.
"'Marley was dead, to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that…'"
Neville gasped when the sinister grey puppet Jacob Marley made his appearance, clanging chains. Teddy applauded delightedly when the first of the three visiting ghosts, Christmas Past, arrived in her shimmery white robe. Kingsley lent his booming voice to jolly, giant Christmas Present. And Dorcas cried when grim, cloaked Christmas Future revealed the grave and crutch of Tiny Tim.
The special effects were impressive. Andromeda's acting perhaps even more so. And by the end, all four enraptured audience members felt as though they'd not been listening to a story, but watching live as Scrooge learned it was Christmas day, he hadn't missed it, and hurried to the Cratchit's.
Right on cue, Teddy gave the famous last line:
"God bless us, every one!"
Of course, after this, he was too excited to sleep (as he was every Christmas Eve) so Andromeda told him he could stay in her bed (as he also did every Christmas Eve). Neville and Dorcas said goodnight and slipped downstairs to 'talk' on the couch awhile. ("It's past eleven," whispered Kingsley. "Shouldn't he be going home?") Andromeda chuckled and carried Teddy to their room. She had him cover his eyes while she and Kingsley dressed for bed, not that she cared what he saw, and then they slid under the blankets together. A little family.
Teddy was asleep in seconds, his cheek to his nana's chest, his arm around her waist. Meow-meow curled up by their feet. Kingsley gently kissed Andromeda before using Nox to put out the lights. Andromeda stroked Teddy's soft hair. Kingsley stared up at the ceiling. They were quiet for several minutes. She thought he might even be asleep when she spoke softly.
"Do you still want to marry me, Kingsley?"
Kingsley turned onto his side to face her.
"As I told the Wizengamot, I would marry you tomorrow. Why?"
"I think that might be alright," she answered in a whisper. "To be married, I mean. Could you ask me?"
"You want-"
"Not now!" she said hurriedly, cutting him off. "But… sometime. If you wanted to, that is."
"Tomorrow at five?"
She giggled. "Let's not schedule it."
"Alright." He leaned over to kiss her once more. "I'll surprise you."
"Fine."
Teddy mumbled and shifted in his sleep. He was drooling onto Andromeda's chest, but she didn't care. She was just happy to have him home again.
For this one night.
A/N:
Happy Halloween! Thank you to everyone who shared their reactions to the last chapter(s) - Francesca, clarasnotlikely, hule, Banglabou, lilikaco, NazChick, KnowInsight, sassanech, zrose, and Francine Hibiscus. It was one of the hardest to write but also one of my favorites (once it was finished). I hope yo udon't hate Harry too much. He thinks he's doing the right thing... he's just wrong. More about Narcissa upcoming in Chapter 39, and yes, there will be a Part Four. This was originally supposed to be a very short fic, but I accidentally fell deep into it and just can't skip to the end (Draco & Hermione's wedding) without showing what happens first. I hope you'll stick with it! Thank you for reading everything thus far!
-AL