Over the next few weeks, after a lot more discussion, Grace helped Agatha find a permanent place to stay. She gave in to a small apartment. While a single room would be more practical, the pressure of a houseful of people wasn't worth it. If Grace was willing to help, for now anyway, she would take it to keep up with this trend of independence. The rent wasn't too much more. The place could hardly be considered an apartment. It was a large room, a kitchenette, a bathroom, and a walk-in closet that could be converted into a bedroom if needed. However, Agatha chose to rough it on the sofa bed for a while as she got settled. Before purchasing new furniture she wanted to be sure to save up enough to cover rent for at least a month should anything happen to her job. There were no indications of such an event as of now, but she didn't need to learn the lesson of how things can change overnight ever again.
Her schedule wasn't consistent which, oddly enough, worked out as more of a blessing than a curse. Routine wasn't working out for her as it allowed her to expect when her cravings would be strong. Despite the fact all was going seemingly well in her life, the desire for a drink quietly grew stronger and stronger. She hadn't the faintest idea why. Grace came around once a week or so, speaking on the phone a couple of times in between. They'd had a recent argument over something that'd happened their years before, both remembering some situation differently than the other. By now it was water under the bridge. She'd become friendly with a handful of regulars at the diner so she wasn't lonely. Compared to her time at the orphanage, she couldn't remember a time she'd been this social. Everything else was going okay, too. Things could always be better, but after how she lived her life the past 10 years, she was doing fine.
Work had its up and downs, naturally. Rude customers were a given now and again, as well as customers who refused to pay. They were a bigger problem than anyone else. At first, Agatha sympathized. As time went on, she started noticing that a handful of these people were repeat offenders. They wore different clothes and hid their faces as much as they could. Thanks to her years with Rooster, she was able to quickly re-learn the mannerisms. Confrontation was never pretty but keeping the joint a place business rather than a charity gave her points with Andy. According to him, she was the first to stand up to these people. The other waitresses silently gave up their own pay to cover the losses. Perhaps being the one to call them out wasn't the greatest thing she could do for her appearance but in the long run it seemed to have benefits. Her resentment toward these people could be considered hypocritical given her past, however, she can honestly say she never pulled a stunt like this. And with the nearest soup kitchen around the block there wasn't any need. When it came down to it, she knew at least most of them had enough change tucked away in their pockets, they just wanted to spare the cost of a meal. At another time she might have thought this clever. Now being on the other end, she opened her eyes.
So with all the reassurances and progression she'd made… why couldn't she stop staring at that glass bottle?
September came around which kept Grace plenty busy as she got Annie started with school. While this didn't have an outright effect on Agatha, hearing stories of Annie's excitement and seeing Grace reciprocate only reminded her that she was the reason the child never received even a half-proper education. It reminded her she wasn't any better than those people who tried to get free meals or got their laughs from making lewd comments about her. She was capable and hurting people. Could she really pretend otherwise?
As if she wasn't struggling enough with her inner conflict, having a new customer come in and recognizing her from the papers back in July didn't help.
"You're that dame… I dunno the name. Not the one who went to jail. The oth'a one." He laughed, almost tauntingly.
"Clearly," Agatha said as she went about clearing nearest table from the bar where the rugged man sat.
"Come on," he said, "I don't mean nothin' by it. It ain't every day you meet someone who been in the papes."
Agatha shrugged, walking past the man and into the kitchen to clear away a stack of dirty plates. From there she could hear the man retelling the story to a couple of the other guys sitting around. One of them recalled the story while the other seemed completely lost. Though it wasn't her job this time of day, Agatha stayed as long as she could at the sink, scrubbing the dishes so hard they might have cracked. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't block out the man's words. He carried on and on as though he'd been the one to rescue Annie in some heroic feat. And when he got towards the end, saying 'that waiter girl' best be counting her blessings, she snapped.
Marching back into the dining area, Agatha approached the man, eyes never breaking their intense stare.
"What, did you write the article?"
The man looked amused. "Naw."
"You know the kid?"
"Nope."
"Then what's got you so hooked? Hell, I betcha no one who was actually there remembered every detail like you seem to have. You get your jollies from other people's nightmares?"
"Look who's talkin'," the man chortled, "the lady who sent them cops on a goose chase."
"So what if I did? At least I've done something exciting in my lifetime, not readin' about it in the newspaper. Who memorizes those stories? How pathetic."
Amusement left the man's eyes as he adjusted himself in his seat. "You're callin' me pathetic? I ain't kidnappin' kiddos for a lousy buck."
"You wouldn't have the brains to do it."
The others in the room grew quiet.
"Ah, yeah?"
"What right do you have to come in here and start airing my dirty laundry to all these people? It happened months ago, I ain't where I was then. You got that?"
"Ain't airing no dirty laundry if them peoples already seen it."
"I'm not denying what I did. Ask me any question and I'll answer with the truth."
"Then what're you yappin' for?"
"Because you came in here and started talkin' about me like I'm the scum of the earth. Like I'm some dumb kid not worth the dust in your filthy pockets. Might'a been true once but not now. I ain't taking any crap from some loser who's got nothin' better to do than retell old news."
"'Ey, 'ey… you gotta familia'ize yourself with them rich folks lives. Never know when youse gotta knows these things. How's you ever gonna make it to the top?"
"The top of what?" Agatha laughed. "The sausage on your plate has more potential in this world than you ever will."
"Agatha…"
Agatha stiffened at the sound of Andy's voice coming from behind her. Slowly, she turned around, waiting for him to continue.
"What is going on here? People come here to enjoy a meal, not be insulted."
"It's okay, mister," the man said raising a hand in the air. "Can't expect nothin' more from them hardened crim'nals."
Whipping around again, Agatha yelled, "That's it!" Her hand balled into a fist, she took a mighty swing at the man, watching him fall to the floor after the impact.
The satisfaction in herself was short-lived, however. Seconds later she felt another man's firm grip on her arms while Andy and the rest of the patrons circled the man on the ground. Coming out of what she could only describe as a semi-conscious blackout, she became painfully aware of what she'd done.
Turning her head to look at whoever kept her in his hold, she saw a mix of anger and concern. She then looked at Andy as he helped the man she'd stuck to his feet.
"I am so sorry, sir," Andy said to the man he'd never address so formally had it not been for what transpired. "I will get you some ice right away."
The man rubbed his jaw, clearly stunned by Agatha's strength.
Agatha tried to speak — tried to apologize for the sake of her job. But she couldn't form the words. Despite the regret she now felt, she couldn't give this man a pass. Her whole life had been filled with people like him. Now, for whatever reason, she was bothered by the hurtful words. And yet, her reaction only proved those words true. In a single second, she alienated everybody in the room. The regulars, the newcomers, and her boss. She'd been given a chance and she blew it. Why did she expect otherwise?
Andy returned with the ice. After apologizing several more times, offering a few free meals, and making sure the man was stabilized, his furious gaze found its way to Agatha. She hadn't moved an inch since being pulled back. It wasn't until now she wondered why the other man hadn't let go seeing as she didn't put up a struggle.
"What do you have to say for yourself?"
Agatha shut her eyes for a brief moment. Say it now, she told herself. Say it now and say it sincere if you want a prayer. But her mouth remained closed as she looked into the cold stare before her. Half a minute passed and she knew she wouldn't be free until she uttered the words everyone wanted to here. The rugged man himself cast his eyes upon her after some time, dumbfounded by her silence.
So Agatha did all she knew she could do. With one great yank of her arms, she set herself loose. Now with a sudden rush of emotion, she forced herself to choke out one statement before running out the door.
"I quit."