Ashurnasirpal II: The Neo-Assyrian tyrant who skinned his victims alive and nailed their flesh to the city gates...
(Ashurnasirpal II buries his khopesh into the neck of a Babylonian soldier before brutally tearing it out, leaving the man to quickly bleed out.)
vs.
Qin Shi Huang: Unifier of China who was so terrified of death, he sacrificed thousands in the search for the 'Elixir of Life."
(Qin Shi Huang watches coldly as his men dig a mass grave and toss several scholars and healers into it.)
WHO IS DEADLIEST?
To find out, we've assembled a team of world class fighters to test history's most lethal weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when two warriors go head to head.
No rules. No safety. No mercy. It's a duel to the death to decide who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!
Here in our elite fight club we have gathered doctors, scientists and weapons experts to test out the lethal arsenals wielded by each of our combatants to determine who would win a fight between warriors who never met in a face to face duel:
Ashurnasirpal II
Circa: 883 B.C.
Age: ?
Height: 5' 6"
Weight: 140 lbs.
Armor:
Iron Helmet
Iron Padded Lamellar
Wickerwork Shield
Qin Shi Huang
Circa: 213 B.C.
Age: 46
Height: 5' 6"
Weight: 140 lbs.
Armor:
Bronze Helmet
Leather Lamellar
Dun Shield
"The only way I can describe today's battle is 'Brutality vs. Insanity,' a battle between two of the most notorious rulers in ancient history," biomedical scientist Geoff Desmoulin started, "On one side you have Ashurnasirpal II, the Neo-Assyrian king who conquered more territory than any other Neo-Assyrian ruler, most famously Babylon.
"On the other hand, you have Qin Shi Huang, founder of the Qin Dynasty. He was able to function as a leader and is the reason why China is where it is today, but the guy was so fearful of death he became obsessed with immortality."
"Geoff when you look at these two individuals right away you are forced to look at their psychological health," trauma doctor Armand Dorian replied, "Ashurnasirpal operated with the same kind of obsession and ferocity similar to Hannibal's in his mission to conquer Rome, one which led him to butcher and torture the inhabitants of conquered cities before burning them to the ground, most famously skinning people alive and mutilating others in horrific fashion.
"Qin Shi Huang was so paranoid of death he would kill people just for seeing him. He obsessed over finding the fabled 'Elixir of Life' to the point he was willing to sacrifice a great number of his own people to achieve it. He had books burned and large numbers of scholars buried alive over this. He's f-cking nuts!"
"We also have to keep in mind he was known to ingest mercury pills, which would have left him in a manic state similar to that of Ivan the Terrible. You would never know what would follow and it was never good," Richard "Mack" Machowicz added.
"Well we won't know how this will turn out until we get ourselves some weapons data. Let's get to it," Geoff concluded.
Ascending to the throne in 883 B.C., Ashurnasirpal II wasted no time putting his already well-equipped fighting force and considerable resources to use in securing his kingdom, making it his mission to maintain order by any means necessary, most infamously putting down a rebellion in Babylon in which he horrifically tortured, maimed and murdered anybody who stood in his way.
"It was believed his cruelty came from a strong love for his nation and there was nothing he wouldn't do to maintain his foothold no matter how brutal," Mack concluded.
The brutal ruler carried an arsenal of Bronze Age weaponry that mutilated many a man in its wake:
Short Range: Khopesh
Mid-Range: Assyrian Spear
Long Range: Assyrian Composite Bow
Special Weapon: Assyrian Dagger
Execution Method: Flaying
But today, he goes up against an equally notorious overlord, one whose insanity became the stuff of legends.
Taking the throne in 247 B.C., Qin Shi Huang made it his destiny to unify all of China, which he would eventually accomplish in 221 when he was crowned emperor of all China. In spite of his ability to function as an effective leader early on in his reign, his paranoia of death would eventually grow to the point he would be taking various medications he believed would extend his life, including sending people all over to search for the fabled 'elixir of life.' Believing he was deceived by so-called 'healers,' he would order the burning of books and the live burials of scholars.
"He obsessed over death to the point he would build his famed Terracotta Army to serve him faithfully in the afterlife. The man is paranoid and he is manic. Those two factors combined together spell trouble for anybody who crosses his path," Mack concluded.
The ancient unifier comes equipped with a deadly arsenal which carved out China's borders:
Short Range: Sword of Goujian
Mid-Range: Ge
Long Range: Crossbow
Special Weapon: Chui
Execution Method: Buried Alive
When things got up close and personal, Qin Shi Huang came equipped with a legendary sword famed for its resistance to tarnishing, the Sword of Goujian.
"The Sword of Goujian is famous for how resistant its bronze blade was to tarnishing and still being incredibly sharp and ready for battle after centuries of being buried in the ruins of Chu. It was 21 inches long and just under 2 pounds in weight," weapons maker Dave Baker explained.
Hank stood with a replica of the sword in hand before a ballistic gel dummy outfitted in Ashurnasirpal II's armor.
"Alright Hank, we want to see a slash to the armor followed by a stab, and then a strike to the helmet. When you are ready!" Geoff called out.
Hank swung the sword at the iron padded lamellar, noticeably denting a few of the scales and nothing more. Rearing backwards he managed to stab through the iron layer for his second attack. He retracted the blade and brought it down on the helmet, leaving only a scratch.
Dr. Dorian made his way over to assess the damage, "With your first strike you are leaving a noticeable dent, yet there is no penetration." He then lifted the lamellar to observe the pressure patches underneath, "However, you generated 280 psi, that is enough to break a rib behind the armor. For your stab you did manage to get through and are getting him in the bottom of the heart, a perfect shot. With your shot to the helmet you only managed to generate 20 psi. You'll get him to feel it, possibly rattle him and that's it."
Following the Sword of Goujian's test the team reviews tapes of the Egyptian khopesh in action from the 'Ancient Egyptian Warrior vs. Han Dynasty Warrior' match, which was similar to the Assyrian's albeit slightly longer. The weapon has also been tested against the same kind of armor as worn by Qin Shi Huang. After viewing the tape our panelists come to their decision.
"I want to like the khopesh because of the numerous tricks it brings to the battle, but I'm really sold on the sword's durability and its greater length," Geoff started.
"I have to disagree and go with the khopesh on this one. Its unique design could allow the user to hook and disarm his foe in a way the Sword of Goujian can't," Dr. Dorian countered.
"I'm siding with the Sword of Goujian for this one. Its durability is what won me over. Coupled with the Dun shield, I think it would easily punch its way through Ashurnasirpal's wickerwork shield," Mack concluded.
In short range weapons, Qin Shi Huang takes the edge with the Sword of Goujian.
Coming up, an armor piercing spear takes on a bronze halberd in a showdown of mid-range weapons.
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The time has come for both warriors to bust out their mid-range arsenals. Up first will be Qin Shi Huang with the Ge.
"The ge, also known as the 'dagger axe,' was a signature weapon in Qin's army. It was noted for its reliability in any situation, whether it be for anti-infantry, anti-cavalry, or even anti-chariot use. It gets its nickname for its dagger-like axe head, in addition to a bronze spear tip on the end, making it very similar to a European halberd. It was 8 feet long and weighed 4 pounds," Dave explained.
"Some of these could be known to have 3 or more heads attached to the shaft," Hank explained as he held his customized Ge in hand.
To test out the Ge's killing capabilities, the team has set up a ballistic gel torso clad in the armor and helmet of Ashurnasirpal II, including an Assyrian wickerwork shield. He will have 15 seconds to hack and stab all three pieces of armor.
"On 3...2...1, attack!"
Hank slammed the polearm down onto the dummy's helmet, sinking the tip a few inches past the iron. Pulling it out he then thrusts it forward, stabbing right through the plated metal and into the gut beneath. Freeing the Ge again he slams the axe down onto the collarbone area, once again managing to penetrate and sending the blade in deeper than before. He then brings it down from his side and swings it around to tear into the wickerwork shield, violently ripping it away from the dummy before Geoff calls out "Time!"
Dr. Dorian makes his way over for his assessment, starting by removing the iron helmet, "Your first shot penetrates the helmet enough to get into the brain matter. This will not kill him immediately, but will eventually," he said before removing the iron plated mail and examining the bodily wounds, "Your gut shot also managed to pierce the armor and you are striking the small intestines, the spearhead's length alone being the primary cause behind this kill. Your strike to the collarbone area shattered it and also went deep enough to hit the aortic knob for a near instant kill. Your shot to the shield registered less than 15 psi, so no broken bones there, but the shield has been torn and is left worthless. All in all, your shots are either instant or near instant kills."
"Top that boyo," Hank chuckled to Jerry.
Answering the Ge's challenge is the Assyrian Spear.
"The Assyrian Spear is identical to the Egyptian's, but comes equipped with an iron head," Dave explained.
With a similar spear having been tested against similar armor before, the team reviews the tape of the mid-range weapons test from the 'Ancient Egyptian vs. Han Warrior' episode. It is then the panelists come to their decision.
"With the Ge you have more options and greater length, plus the capability of snatching an opponent's shield away from him, edge Ge," Geoff started.
"The Ge is an early halberd weapon that gives you multiple options. Multiple options equals more kills, edge Ge," Dr. Dorian seconded.
"Superior reach, more options, I agree with both of you on this. My edge goes to the Ge," Mack concluded.
In mid-range weapons, Qin Shi Huang takes the edge with the Ge.
Coming up, the battle goes to long range when a uniquely shaped bow takes on the Qin Dynasty's most reliable long range killer.
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The time has now come for both warriors to take aim with their long range killers. Up first will be Ashurnasirpal II with the Assyrian Composite Bow.
"The Assyrian's composite bow was somewhat unusual in appearance with its triangular shape and duck head-shaped nocks at each end. They used 37 ½ inch long cane arrows fitted with bronze heads," Dave explained.
Jerry stood at the outdoor range with an Assyrian bow in hand. Andy was also present with a very tall wickerwork shield positioned upright.
"The Assyrians were famed for using their bow in sieges. Their most common tactic was to have one soldier stand in position with their tall wickerwork shields and the other would fire from the relative safety behind it. It was both an effective and fearsome tactic that gave the Assyrians their prestige in the ancient world," Jerry explained.
To show off the bow's skills, a ballistic gel torso clad in Qin's armor has been placed 40 yards downrange. Jerry will be given one barbed arrow and two broadheaded ones to show off the bows accuracy and penetrative skills.
Jerry took his position behind the shield and readied the barbed arrow. He took aim and popped out, sending it flying into the target's throat. He then goes for the broadhead arrow and fires it into the leather surface, but it bounces off, leaving a small dent behind. Undeterred he readies his last arrow and again strikes the torso in a weaker part, but again it fails to penetrate.
Dr. Dorian makes his way over to assess the damage done, "Your barbed arrow struck this guy in one of the worst possible areas period. This is giving him the baddest possible tracheotomy known to man. You rip this arrow out and he's going to quickly bleed to death. Either way, he's a goner."
He then examined the lamellar closely before removing it, "Both of your arrows failed to achieve any serious penetration. Your first one bounces off, no kill, and your second strikes a weaker portion where it would only be enough to give him a small prick, again no kill."
Following the Assyrian's showing, the panel reviews tapes of the Crossbow's testing from the 'Ancient Egyptian vs. Han Warrior' battle, having been tested against armor similar to that of the Egyptian's. After careful consideration the panel comes to its decision.
"In spite of its failure to achieve any serious penetration on Qin's leather lamellar, I give my edge to the Assyrian Composite Bow for its faster reload time, lower fatigue rate and the firing technique incorporating the archer standing behind the shield," Geoff started.
"I agree. It was this same bow that made the Assyrians feared in siege warfare coupled with its deadly accuracy," Dr. Dorian seconded.
"I also take into consideration the 'arrow rain' tactic that can be carried out with this particular kind of bow, edge Assyrian Composite Bow," Mack concluded.
In long range weapons, Ashurnasirpal II takes the edge with the Assyrian Composite Bow.
Coming up, these two infamous rulers break out their trusted backup weapons when a stealthy sidearm dagger goes up against a skull smashing mace and then later, our experts examine each tyrant's infamous torture methods.
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The time has come for both warriors to unleash their special weapons. Up first will be Ashurnasirpal II with the Assyrian Dagger.
"The Assyrian dagger was similar to the Russian kindjal, albeit heavier and slightly longer. It was popular for its concealability and its great stabbing and slashing power. It was 18 inches long and weighed 3 pounds," Dave explained.
Jerry stood with the dagger in hand before a lone pig carcass.
"We want to see everything this dagger can do. We want to see a hack, a slash and a pierce. When you are ready," Geoff explained.
Jerry got into position.
"On 3...2...1, attack!"
Jerry swung the dagger downward into the pig's stomach, spilling a torrent of blood upon the floor. Pulling back he then brought the dagger over his head and stabbed the carcass in the center of its back in another gory spectacle before pulling out one last time and slashing into its throat.
"I don't need to second guess the outcome of your three strikes," Dr. Dorian said making his way over, "Your first strike disemboweled this guy for a rapid bleed out, followed by a direct stab to the heart for another instant kill and lastly, going deep enough for a near decapitation."
"But as it is with almost all daggers, this is another weapon where you have to get right up close to your enemy in order to use it effectively. My weapon offers greater length and it would be able to pulverize an enemy even through his armor," Hank replied.
Qin Shi Huang swings back with a miniature wrecking ball of his own, the Chui.
"The chui was a Chinese take on the mace. It consists of a heavy iron or bronze sphere on the end of a long handle with shapes that can either be shaped like garlic or melons. It was a strictly brute force weapon that required great strength to use. The one we have here is a 31 ½ inches and weighs nearly 4 ½ pounds," Dave explained.
Hank stood with the Chui at the ready before a gel torso outfitted in Ashurnasirpal's helmet and body armor, in addition to another wickerwork shield, to test the blunt force trauma it can inflict.
"Alright Hank, we want a strike to each piece of armor. On 3...2...1, smash 'em to pieces!"
Hank swung the mace in a swooping, overhead motion and bringing it down onto the shield, snapping off a large portion of it. He turned his attention to the iron helmet and raised the mace up high to slam it down onto the crown of the skull, smashing it inwards like a tin can. He then went for one final swing into the torso's chest, denting the iron plates and even breaking a few off.
"The readings for this bad boy are off the charts. According to the pressure sensors, the strike to the shield registered at over 300 psi, enough to shatter this man's arm. We also registered similar numbers to the helmet, enough to destroy the brain matter for an instant kill," Dr. Dorian remarked, observing the fake blood leaking out from beneath the helmet. He then studied the damage done to the iron padded lamellar before removing it, "For sure you are shattering this man's ribs and sternum in one swing and contusing any internal organs beneath, this will be another kill shot for you."
"But that is a very cumbersome weapon you are lugging around there and was not recommended for use in warfare due to its weight. You can take all the swings you want, but in the end you're gonna be out of breath and open to the quickness of the dagger," Jerry retorted.
Both special weapons have annihilated their targets, but where do our panelists stand?
"For me it's the Chui all the way. It may be one-dimensional, but anywhere it strikes it causes damage, even to an armored foe," Geoff started.
"I agree. The dagger can cause trauma, yet it's another weapon where you need to be right up and close to your enemy to get the job done, whereas the Chui offers some greater reach. Edge Chui," Mack seconded.
"I'm a bit iffy on the mace due to all the strength you have to put into using it, yet at the same time you will always feel the hit of a mace no matter where it connects, edge Chui," Dr. Dorian concluded.
In special weapons, Qin Shi Huang takes the edge with the Chui.
Coming up, two brutal methods of torture are profiled for the first time ever and then later, history is rewritten as two ancient tyrants clash in a duel to the death!
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To learn more about the barbarity exhibited by both ruthless tyrants, we must first examine their most infamous methods of torture, starting first with Qin Shi Huang and his live burials.
The panel has gathered outside where a ballistic gel dummy is in the midst of being buried.
"Qin is infamous for his burning of books and burying of scholars after he was deceived by various so-called 'healers' in his search for the fabled elixir of life," explained Deadliest Warrior historian Bruce Fury, "He would have a hole dug several feet deep, sometimes having multiple people buried in it."
"From my firsthand experience of dealing with suffocation, a person can hold their breath for so long, but then when you need to breathe you will get dirt in your lungs, your chest won't be able to expand, and you will also breathe more forcefully which will result in broken ribs. Once that happens you lose consciousness and then after 3 minutes you suffer oxygen deprivation, 6 minutes results in severe brain damage and finally death," Dr. Dorian explained.
"A very slow way to go and also a lot of psychological terror in regards to the fear many have of not just being buried alive, but death itself," Mack added.
"Indeed that is one of the worst ways to go, very frightening to think about," Geoff concluded before the panelists turned their attention to where another ballistic gel torso had been set up on a table.
"What can you tell us about Ashurnasirpal II's preferred method of torture?" Geoff asked Bruce.
"Ashurnasirpal II displayed a fanaticism and brutality that was common among the Assyrians, especially in his famed conquest of Babylon. One of his favorite torture methods was to place a prisoner on a table and slowly removing their skin, essentially 'flaying' them like a fish. During a campaign against the city of Tela, he was said to have built a pillar near the city gate and decorated it with the skin of revolting chiefs to make his example that would deter future rebellions," Bruce explained.
"A level of brutality and gruesomeness unlike any ever seen," Mack replied before looking over to the table, "And tell us why is this dummy's head tilted backwards?"
"He wanted to do whatever he could to make sure his victim stayed alive for as long as possible. To do so, he would have their head tilted backwards to make the blood rush there, which would keep them conscious as they were flayed alive," Bruce replied.
Jerry and Andy then proceeded to systematically flay the gel torso with period appropriate knives, removing the superficial layer of skin until nothing but the artificial muscles were exposed.
"My god...that is not for the faint of heart," Geoff commented.
"And as Bruce pointed out, he would be alive and in an ungodly amount of pain until he would slowly bleed to death," Dr. Dorian concluded.
Both methods of torture have shown their gruesome capabilities, but where do our panelists stand?
"Both are incredibly horrible ways to go. Ashurnasirpal's is slow and painful, Qin's is slower and more terrifying in my honest opinion. These were both strictly torture methods and neither was ever used on the battlefield so I'm calling this one even," Dr. Dorian concluded.
In torture methods, our warriors are even.
Coming up, our panel gauges the critical X-factors of these two vicious rulers and afterward, they will meet in battle for the very first time to see who is 'The Deadliest Warrior!'
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And now Mack will gauge the X-factors of each warrior.
"With both of these warriors we have to start out with psychological health. In spite of his paranoia, Qin could succeed as a leader in some instances. Ashurnasirpal on the other hand was brutal, but sane and managed to expand the Neo-Assyrian empire's borders to some of their greatest lengths. We gave him the edge with a 72 to Qin's 47."
"Up next we consider endurance and Ashurnasirpal takes the edge because he was in excellent physical condition whereas Qin was oftentimes too afraid to leave his own room. We gave him an 89 to Qin's 74."
"For physicality again Ashurnasirpal takes the edge as he was constantly on the move, whereas Qin wasn't all that active. Again he gets an 89 to Qin's 68."
"Metallurgy is considered and we gave the edge to Qin for his more reliable weapons. We gave him an 82 to Ashurnasirpal's 69."
"Leadership is factored in and again Ashurnasirpal takes the edge because he knew how to lead troops into battle, whereas Qin's mental illness could create a serious liability for both himself, his men and his subjects. We gave Ashurnasirpal a 78 to Qin's 64."
"Lastly we factor in brutality and while Qin was willing to sacrifice his own people in his quest for the elixir of life, Ashurnasirpal is the hands down winner. He flayed people alive, burned down cities, terrorized civilians, nobody was safe from his wrath. We gave him the highest possible rating with a 100 to Qin's 89."
Our scientists and weapons experts are done testing the results and the time has come to decide who will be the victor. To ensure the battle won't be decided by a single lucky blow, the battle will be simulated one thousand times in a duel to the death.
The battle will be fought in a 5-on-5 encounter featuring Ashurnasirpal II accompanied by 4 Assyrian warriors, all of whom will wear the same armor as him.
On the other side, Qin Shi Huang will be accompanied by 4 Qin Dynasty warriors, all of whom will also be wearing the same armor as him.
Who will prevail in a battle between two of the ancient world's most brutal rulers?
IN THE END THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!
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We find ourselves taken to southern China where Ashurnasirpal II and 4 of his most trusted warriors have arrived in the new land, seeking to broaden the borders of the Neo-Assyrian Empire. They are in the middle of a reconnaissance mission, the hilly terrain having forced them to abandon their chariots and continue on foot up a steep dirt hill.
Ashurnasirpal II: 5
The quintet eventually nears the summit when they hear a blood curdling shriek. They ready their weapons and take a defensive stance in front of their leader, but when nothing happens he orders them to stand down. Another shriek follows and he orders them forth.
Finally reaching the hilltop they find themselves on a flat plateau where 4 soldiers of the reigning Qin Dynasty are in the process of burying a group of men alive.
Overseeing the live burial is the emperor himself, Qin Shi Huang, watching stoically as the so-called 'healers' plead for their lives, only to have more dirt shoveled upon them for their efforts. They had provided him a false lead on where to locate the elixir that would grant him the immortality he so desperately sought and this was their punishment.
Qin Shi Huang: 5
Looking back to his men, the Assyrian king orders them to ready their bows and shields and they take their positions.
The clanking of metal makes enough noise and the Qin emperor looks over to see 5 strange-looking men in bronze armor positioning two very tall shields. He orders his men to stop what they are doing and they ready their crossbows in anticipation.
Ashurnasirpal II suddenly barks an order and his archers launch their arrows into the air, raining down upon the Qin warriors as they scramble for cover behind their shields. One of the Chinese warriors is too late and a barbed arrow punches through his left eye.
Ashurnasirpal II: 5 – Qin Shi Huang: 4
Qin shouts at his men to attack and they pull the triggers on their crossbows, yet the Assyrians are protected by their tall wickerwork shields. They immediately reach for extra bolts to reload their crossbows and when Ashurnasirpal notices how long it takes he orders his men to charge and they do so, raising their spears and sickle swords.
The emperor panics at the sight of the brazen charge and orders his men to meet them head on, raising their own weapons while he stays at a distance waiting for the battle to end.
The warriors meet in a clash of bronze as a Qin warrior impales an Assyrian through the stomach with his Ge's spike before pulling it out and bringing it down onto his collarbone, managing to pierce and tear through the blood vessels, ripping it out in a hasty manner that would leave the foreign warrior bleeding out quickly.
Ashurnasirpal II: 4 – Qin Shi Huang: 4
Elsewhere in the battle, an Assyrian manages to impale a Qin warrior who came charging at him with his Chui, the cumbersome weapon having proven difficult for the Chinese fighter to lift, his spear's tip punching the back of the man's leather lamellar.
Ashurnasirpal II: 4 – Qin Shi Huang: 3
The Ge carrying warrior raises his polearm to intercept an attack from a khopesh-wielding Assyrian, the foreign warrior's sickle-shaped blade catching the shaft and locking both men in a brief tug of war, but the Qin soldier brings his foot up and kicks the invader in the stomach and sends him staggering backwards before swinging the polearm's head into his gut. With the Assyrian left coughing up blood, the Chinese fighter raises the halberd-like weapon above his head and brings it down onto the Assyrian's, striking his iron helmet with enough force to penetrate and cause severe skull trauma.
Ashurnasirpal II: 3 – Qin Shi Huang: 3
The other Qin warrior finds himself double teamed by the other Assyrians, yet mounts a brave offense with his Chui. He manages to duck a swing from an Assyrian's khopesh and drives the mace into his gut to knock the wind out of him and leave him coughing up blood. The other Assyrian swings at him, but he too finds himself taken out of commission as the heavy iron sphere connects with his kneecap, leaving the man howling in pain before his face his obliterated by another strike.
Ashurnasirpal II: 2 – Qin Shi Huang: 3
The other Assyrian struggles back to his feet, his lifetime of training having toughened him to pain. It was unlike any other pain he had ever felt just to stand, yet his fierce pride and patriotism kept him clutching his khopesh and he shot it outward as the Qin warrior killed his comrade, bringing the sickle-shaped blade down onto the man's arm as he was left winded by his last attack, severing it just above the elbow.
The Qin warrior's dark eyes widened at the sight of his severed arm lying on the ground beneath him and he turned around to see the khopesh swinging at him, his head following suit in a torrent of blood.
Ashurnasirpal II: 2 – Qin Shi Huang: 2
His opponent slain the Assyrian warrior finally collapsed to his knees, succumbing to his internal injuries.
Ashurnasirpal II: 1 – Qin Shi Huang: 2
The last Qin warrior turns to meet the Assyrian king, who charges at him with his spear and attempts to stab the man, yet he brings his Ge up to parry the blow. He goes for another stab, but again his blow is intercepted and the Chinese soldier goes for a swing, but Ashurnasirpal is quicker and ducks underneath, but drops his spear in the process.
Reaching for his khopesh the Neo-Assyrian king dodges another attempted strike and swings his sickle sword again, burying the tip into the Chinese soldier's bicep and hitting the bone. The Qin warrior cried in pain and was forced to drop the Ge, his screams amplifying as Ashurnasirpal buried the tip in deeper and tore the blade downward along the man's forearm before it was yanked out and he was left gushing blood at a manic pace. The maniacal king swung the blade again and buried the tip into the Qin's face before tearing violently one last time.
Ashurnasirpal II: 1 – Qin Shi Huang: 1
All of his men defeated, Qin Shi Huang rises to his feet and draws his Sword of Goujian while Ashurnasirpal II stares at him with murderous intent in his eyes, fresh blood dripping from the blade of his khopesh.
With an animalistic roar the Assyrian king makes a sudden charge and swings his khopesh at the emperor's head, but he is blocked by the man's shield and struck in the midsection by a swing from the man's sword, but his body armor absorbs most of the blow. The Qin emperor goes for another swing and again connects, leaving a deep gash in Ashurnasirpal's right cheek that leaves a fresh torrent of blood running down his face and matting down his beard.
The warm, sticky sensation awakens the demon within him and all he can see is red as he charges the Qin emperor, swinging at him wildly in the hopes of hacking him to pieces, but Qin Shi Huang manages to block all of his blows with his sword and before smacking him hard with his shield and sending him falling flat on his back.
The khopesh jumps from his hands and the fallen king looks up to see Qin standing tall over him and bringing his sword down. He manages to roll out of the way at the last second and reaches into his side holster as the emperor recovers from his swing.
With another feral roar he leaps at the Chinese fighter and plunges his dagger into the man's side, hard enough to penetrate the leather surface and cause him to scream in pain and disbelief.
Hearing the emperor's screams was like music to Ashurnasirpal's ears and he continued to drive the dagger in further, twisting it harder as he saw the life draining from Huang's eyes. Eventually the Qin emperor passed out from the pain coupled with his blood loss and fell to the ground.
Pleased with his work, Ashurnasirpal reached down for his khopesh and raised it high above his head to finish the job. He brought the blade down to strike, only to stop himself at the last second as an evil thought suddenly crept into his mind.
With a dark smile crossing his features he prepared himself for what was to come next.
The scene goes black and a cacophony of blood curdling shrieks follow and we come to find Qin Shi Huang lying tied down to a table. He has been stripped naked and all the flesh is being flayed away from his body, exposing his muscles to the elements as Ashurnasirpal II stands over him kicking away at his withering body to make him scream some more. Blood is everywhere and the Assyrian king has gathered some of it into a goblet and drinks some of it down as his fallen opponent finally gives up the ghost.
The victorious king roars maniacally as he raises his blood-filled goblet into the air.
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Winner: Ashurnasirpal II
Ashurnasirpal II:
Khopesh: 120
Assyrian Spear: 146
Assyrian Composite Bow: 354
Assyrian Dagger: 22
Total: 642
Qin Shi Huang:
Sword of Goujian: 117
Ge: 168
Crossbow: 43
Chui: 30
Total: 358
"Ashurnasirpal II emerged victorious due to his dominance of the X-factors and the deadlier accuracy with his composite bow. Even though Qin had the more advanced weaponry of the two, his mental instability prevented him from effectively leading his troops into battle and that would ultimately turn the tide in his opponent's favor," Geoff concluded.
(Ashurnasirpal II trudges through the lowlands seeking to reclaim his chariot and regroup with his forces gathered on the outskirts. Strapped to his side is the Sword of Goujian, proof the Qin emperor has fallen. With this knowledge his men will be unstoppable and China will be his for the taking.)
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Next time on 'Deadliest Warrior' it's a battle of two of the Middle East's most brutal generals:
Saladin: The chivalrous Saracen leader who repelled Richard the Lionheart during the Third Crusade...
vs.
Timur the Lame: Turko-Mongol conqueror most infamous for his pyramids built from the skulls of conquered citizens.
Who will be...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR?
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Author's Note: And so concludes yet another installment of my 'Deadliest Warrior' story. Hope you all can really get behind the gore factor on this ending! WHOO HOO!
I got the idea to use Ashurnasirpal II from Harbingers of NEVEC's DW story where he has him (accidentally listed as Ashurbanipal rather than Ashurnasirpal II) taking on Nero. Obviously there's no Ashurbanipal II listed on Wikipedia or anywhere else online, so thankfully we got that cleared up so this could happen proper.
The inspiration for including Qin Shi Huang comes from DeadAliveManiac's story where he has him fighting against Caligula. Ashurnasirpal II from what I've read would be a more mentally competent opponent than the Roman madman, so obviously the outcome was different here.
Overall this made me think of the "Ivan the Terrible vs. Hernan Cortes" episode from the show where you have a guy on one side who is batshit crazy and on the other, a guy who is brutal, yet sane and calculating. As it was on there, the sane guy wins in the end. Just goes to show that while insanity CAN be cool, it's still not the best "method of approach" on the battlefield...
I'd also like to take the time to introduce a few more new battle ideas:
Jewish Zealot vs. Scottish Highlander (which may follow 'Navy SEAL vs. Spetsnaz')
British Regular vs. Swedish Carolean (I'd like to give a very special thanks to Zivon96 for pointing the Caroleans out to me. I had no idea who they were before he mentioned them and in the process he helped resolve my dilemma of not having a good enough opponent in mind for the British Regular, which again I credit "Assassin's Creed III" for in getting me obsessed with wanting to incorporate them into this story.)
Well I think that covers everything until next time so as always read and review! This is Metal Harbinger saying SPREAD THE SICKNESS, ONE MIND AT A TIME! \m/