Disclaimer: I own nothing.
"Alright, that's it, I've had enough. I'm on my way to you. It's nauseating and I'm sick of waiting for all these pointless call to go through..."
A harsh slap to my hand made me instantly growl at the dark-haired, green-eyed older guy I found I had to stop refering to as my Butler since he was now running the company. (Bastard still got to treat me like he used to though, which wasn't fair.) And I had no idea why I suddenly couldn't touch my dining utensils, or food, which caused me to glare at him.
"What?" I barked. Merida gets to eat, so why can't I? My steak was waving seductively at me and I was reminded that since that morning, I'd had a quick check-up with Pabbie, (who declared my wrist fine, but said he couldn't take it off until later after his other appointments,) I hadn't eaten anything all day. After that check-up, Merida made it her mission to go basically drag me back outside and go horseback riding with me and so we were out for the rest of the day.
Now said woman was greedily stuffing her 'gob' full of mashed potatoes and I found myself salivating.
When Olaf cleared his throat, I tore my eyes away from that hateful Scotswoman to glare back at him. "Alright, look. You and Gaston are both not allowed to eat anymore, until you smash this bullshit." Olaf gave me a particular stare that still effected me somewhat, before directing the same look to Gaston. The bigger man cleared his throat, but didn't say anything.
"Pabbie'll be here any minute and I want to eat before he takes my cast off." I was the first to speak. I heard Merida snort before giving out a pleased moan at what I was apparently missing out on. Damn you Merida.
"I don't think so, Lady Arendelle." Olaf fixed me with a reprimanding look and I shrunk a little more. Shit. I dared not look at Merida, if hearing her let out a stuffed chuckle made me flush a bit, seeing how she was looking at me would be a thousand times worse. She hadn't seen my and Olaf's relationship until then and now I knew I wouldn't hear the end of it.
"Olaf-" Gaston tried.
"No. You've been here for three days now and neither of you has said anything to the other." He should know not to bash my girlfriend. Still Olaf knew what buttons to push with me. Like, hell I'd give him total satisfaction though. He also knew I would do what he told me to, whether I liked it or not.
"Gaston..." I directed a sweet grin at him that was dripping venom with each word (Something I'd picked up from Elsa) "...I'm sorry you're the biggest asshole ever and that you didn't mean to accuse the love of my life of being a fucking gold digger just because you don't like her." I paused when he looked at me. "Because you were tired and hungry." I added with a sneer.
There was a hearty chuckle from Merida. "Well, that's harsh now, isn't it?" She then took a gulp of wine, not minding the curt look Olaf passed her that told her to hush, lest she be told to finish her food elsewhere.
"But that was a start and now the ice is broken. Pretty good. Gaston?" Olaf let out his own reserved chuckle but kept his face straight as he looked to said mutant of a man who slumped in his seat.
"Anna, I'm sorry that that particular day was the day my wife passed away." Gaston begrudgingly grumbled and I suddenly wanted to stab my hand with the steak knife. He's not serious! Immense guilt flooded me, along with anger as we all stared wide-eyed at him.
"Then why the fuck did you opt to spend the whole day with me if I did nothing but piss you the hell off?! Why come to Norway on that day anyway?"
"Anna-" Both Olaf and Merida said at the same time as I stood to my feet having utterly lost my appetite.
But, I completely took them off guard by scooting my chair back in as calmly as I could, regardless that my hands were shaking and that there was a lump beginning to form in my throat. "I really am sorry Gaston, I had no idea. Now if you'll excuse me-" I was relieved beyond belief when Pabbie came through the doors and I would have ran to him if I could have. goddammit, Anna. Even as I thought that, I was still torn about what he had implied about Elsa! He could have taken it out on ME and not her.
Running a frustrated hand through my hair, I nodded at Pabbie and let him lead me to one of the rooms across from the dinning hall.
"But no, I'm not a skeptic anymore. At last I see what all of this ridiculous hard work is for. The moisture in the air is begging for release and the memory of your stare is raining down on me..."
I sat patiently, not to mention quietly, while Pabbie worked his magic, all the while debating on calling Elsa or not. I was not expecting that whatsoever and I felt like an even bigger asshole than I'd accused Gaston of being. Guess this is what happens when there's no communication. I need that. But I didn't allow myself to tear myself up more than was necessary. It was as much my fault as it was his for not telling me. You're a mountain of a man and I know you aren't bulletproof, but jesus I'm just a kid! A kid who's is irrevocably in love with someone YOU pointed out to me.
I remembered that day in the park when he first told me that 'Home doesn't have to be a place. That it could be a person.' That weight I saw... was his loss of his own Home. I clenched my jaw. But the reason you don't like Elsa is something else entirely isn't it? As the answer became clear, I became a little confused, not knowing what to do or even how to bring it up with the stonewall of a man. You said you want me to 'show you the way,' make you believe there's hope for you'...then you...have to let me go...My eyes widened suddenly as it completely dawned on me.
"You're awful quiet, young Arendelle. Does it hurt?" Pabbie asked gently, looking at me with old blue eyes.
"No. It isn't my wrist that's hurt." I admitted. My heart is sore. My brain is working over time. I gave him a tired grin and finally gave in, pulling out my phone and deciding to put aside what I was thinking about for now. After what happened at the dinner table I couldn't just go back in there and spill it all, no, I needed a little more time. Maybe Elsa can help me out a little-
My thought was cut short when I felt a stiffness in my joints as I shifted to get my phone. I didn't remember the last time I rode a horse, I was pretty sore, but it was the good kind that let me know I did something. As I looked at my phone, my heart sank a little when I saw that it was a little too late to call her, so I settled for sending a 'goodnight' text and before I could put it away, it rang and I nearly jumped out of my seat in surprise. Limbs and ass screaming in protest. Ow...
"Stay still." Pabbie chided.
I gave him a pointed look, answering my phone while doing so.
"You think a 'text' is going to make me sleep better?" Elsa's voice was thick with sleep and it sounded so much more cute when she tried to sound upset.
"Sorry, kirsebæret mitt." I ended up smiling against my will, not caring if Pabbie saw it. Three days without speaking was a challenge. Such a challenge, that I had opted to leave my phone in my room when Merida basically forced me to change into my riding clothes. If that woman had practiced any of her own etiquette lessons, it was that a 'Lady should wear proper attire when going for a ride.' (Back then, she didn't care much for that sort of thing, but once Olaf accidentally caught a glimpse under her skirts when she blew past him on a horse...I'll just say: she changed her opinions after that talk with Olaf.)
"Long day?" She asked when I forgot to say something more.
"oh, sorry." I cleared my throat. "It was fine until I ended up sticking my foot in my mouth instead of eating dinner." I sighed, slumping into the chair and firmly ignoring the way my stomach grumbled its agitation with that event.
"You and Gaston haven't made up yet?" It sounded like she rolled on her side and I imagined her cuddling a pillow. Though, I didn't know if that was a good thing or not. To me, her voice slowly began to change into something else.
"Nobody insults my girlfriend and gets away with it." I stated stubbornly, still feeling mixed up about it. "Regardless, I believe we're both acting like children."
"So be the more mature one, Schatzi." I could tell she was smiling, but there was something off. Whatever it was wasn't calming me like it usually did. Something was wrong, but I figured I'd try to soothe her with the sound of my voice. Like she usually did for me, whether she knew it or not.
"Yeah, I snapped at him first, but I did apologize a little more sincerely afterwards." I chuckled. (Probably a little more forceful than necessary, but I was trying.) "I think I shocked all of them by excusing myself rather than scrambling out the door like a wounded animal."
"I wish I was there to give you a congratulatory kiss." She then sighed heavily. "Seriously, I'm really missing you right now, Anna." Sadness finally seeped into her words and I felt my stomach clench.
"What's wrong, Sweetheart?" I asked tenderly, forgetting that Pabbie was there altogether.
"Nothing, I-I just- " She paused, trying to keep the pain out of her voice to no avail. "I...had a dream about you and I woke up firmly believing you were going to be there when I turned over-" I sat straight up, hearing a shaky breath on the other line. Soreness forgotten as my heart tightened.
"Oh, Baby. No, Please don't cry." I tried to soothe, just then, Pabbie had finished and I stood to my feet before he could further examine my wrist. "Stay strong for me, Elsa. Can you do that?" I don't know what I'd do if you started crying right now!
"I-I'm sorry, I guess it just really hit me today that you weren't here." Now her voice was starting to thicken with emotion and I hated that I couldn't do anything about it. Get it together, Arendelle. Use those words that you say you aren't good with.
"I am there." I said firmly, having no real idea about what I was saying, but I needed to start somewhere. "My heart and soul are right there with you, kirsebæret mitt. No matter how far away I am from you, you have all of me." My feet brought me to the window and I looked out at the darkening sky outside with an intense longing that I'd never felt before. "I'm lonely too-" I fought the urge to let a tear slip down my face. "But everyday I'm away from you, I fall more and more in love with you." 'Are you writing a song?' I easily turned my subconsciousness away and continued. "Die Liebe wachst mit der Entfernung." I whispered. "Don't cry baby."
"A-Anna- goddammit I want you here!" Elsa sniffled, trying desperately to do as I said.
"Sshh. It's okay, Love." Bringing my eyes up to the celing, I let a few tears of my own fall. "I love you, Elsa. god, I love you and I miss you just as much as you miss me." I exhaled sharply.
"Then...then come back to me, Schatzie." Elsa's finally broke and more tears fell from my eyes as I leaned my forehead on the window pane.
"N-not yet, Darling. I'm not ready yet." I wiped my nose, feeling like I was getting run over by a train. "If I come back now, we could end up hurting each other again, understand? I'm not finished fixing myself."
"I don't care." She said through her teeth. "I need you here."
"Of course you care, Elsa." I whispered, now sniffling. "I made a promise to you and I intend to keep that promise. If I come back now, I wouldn't be able to touch you like you want me to. Like I want to be able to."
There was a long pause after that as I listened to her quietly crying. I was too, having felt like my heart was stopping. But I stayed firm. This is what needed to happen, my vision was about a potter and his clay. In order for him to make a perfect vessel, the clay needed to be molded, reshaped, and then it needed to go through the fire before it came out, ready to face the world. It hurt me to do this to her, to us, but that was the only way. We had something special, something more than love, something that would last forever and it scared me to think about it. I needed to accept that what we had would overcome anything. She needed to too.
Neither of us knew it would come to this when we first started, but now that it was here, we needed to work on it. We had taken it for granted the first time and it almost destroyed us. Like hell I'm going to let that happen again.
"I love you so much, Anna." Elsa whispered after awhile.
"I'll be home soon, my Love. I promise. Hang in there." I inhaled deeply, having the last of my tears leak from my eyes. "They say pain comes in the night, but joy comes in the morning. I don't know how true that is, but I love you too, Elsa. Remember that you have me right there with you and that whenever I sleep, I dream of you too." I licked my lips. "No matter how many miles are between us, there is nothing that'll get in the way of what we have. It's nothing more than miles and my love for you is not going to change."
"Neither is mine, Schatzie. I-I believe in you. I'll stand by you no matter what and I'll look forward to you keeping that promise." She finally seemed to have calmed. "I'll be waiting. We'll be waiting for you."
I smiled. "Sleep now, kirsebæret mitt. I'm right here." I bit my lip, but said what I was thinking. "I exist for you, Elsa. If you hadn't found me, I would have found you. This isn't going to be easy but..."
"It'll be worth it." Elsa finished and I could tell I'd squeezed Happy Tears from her beautiful eyes. "Oh, Schatzie, I love you."
"You'll be in my arms very soon and you can bet your sweet bottom that I won't let you go again." I repeated sternly. Mainly to comfort her futher than I already had. "I love you too, Liebling." With renewed strength, resolve, I straightened up and kept whispering sweet nothings to her until she finally fell back to sleep.
When I put my phone back in my pocket, I turned and found myself being enclosed in a hug. I only had a second to think about who it was when I felt the muscles of his chest flexed.
"I was wrong, Kid and I'm so very sorry." Gaston choked on a sob, which seemed to punch me in the gut all over again, and I returned his hug, gripping the back of his shirt.
"I'm sorry too. I-I didn't know- I don't know what you go through, Gaston, but all the same..." I looked up at him. "You need to let me grow up." Is what came out of my mouth, having recalled my earlier thoughts. "So I fell in love and like the idiot I was, I let it bite me back for teasing it, but that's going to happen, right? I let my emotions control me and that scared the shit out of both of us...but, I need to work on that. Elsa can help me with that." I sniffled when I felt his hand place itself on the top of my head. "You blame her for what I did to myself because you don't want to blame Me. I know you love me like your own kid...but I can't stay under your wings forever."
A chuckle left my throat. "This Cardinal needs to spread its own wings."
Gaston laughed too and lifted me further off the floor, burying his face in my neck as a few more tears slipped from his eyes. "I forgive you, you big lug." Again I bit my lip, but said anyway: "And I love you too."
"...We're cleverly, strategically, challenging our fright and insecurities, and never seem to want to leave..."
After he calmed, Merida brought me my plate of food and I'd realized that I rode horses all day, comforted my girlfriend and forgave my...mentor, all on an empty stomach. I think I deserve this steak! All the same, I wondered if I was closer to fulfilling my promise. Wait for me Elsa.
"Hypothetically if you were point A and theoretically if I was point B, we would be, we would be frantically melting into one massive point that could overcome anything..."
A/N: Song inspiration: Teleport A & B by The Spill Canvas
I own nothing.
(But I strongly suggest you give that song a listen...gave me chills.) ^^ thanks for reviews and all that!
'Die Liebe wachst mit der Entfernung' Absence makes the heart grow fonder.