Chapter 36 - Fade To Black

BPOV

The sun was streaming down. I could feel it warming my body all over, its heat radiating out from my face, down my arms and legs, and into my fingertips and toes. I had my eyes closed, and I felt content and peaceful. Edwards's fingertips ran delicately over my face, and I tried to open my eyes to look at him, but I couldn't. The sun was too bright, so I settled for just picturing his face in my mind; his eyes, his nose, and that wonderful crooked smile. Wherever we were I loved it, it was just the two of us what else did I need?

I smiled as I felt his lips press to mine, moving slowly across my jaw and then down my throat, my smiled turned into a scowl as I felt him pull away. I forced my eyes open and locked immediately onto Edward, smiling at him, but slowly, his face began to change. His wild, bronze, hair began to disappear and fade into a dirty blond colour, his dazzling green eyes began to turn into a shade of blue that sapped all the warmth I was feeling from the sun. I looked on in horror as Edwards face morphed into one that I never wanted to see again.

I was awoken from the dream-like experience and could feel my heart drumming in my chest, my hands were shaking and my breathing felt out of control. I felt disoriented, drowsy and my head was throbbing. I couldn't remember where I was, and I couldn't remember leaving the hotel with Edward, but we were on the move somewhere. In a car, I presumed and I tried to focus on the scene outside of the window. I could make out street lights whipping past the window and headlights of other cars approaching us from the opposite direction.

A wave of nausea washed over me and I tried to move my head, it was resting against the window and the vibrations were not helping the throbbing or the nausea. As soon as I moved an inch, the pain switched from a dull ache to absolute agony and I groaned and shut my eyes again, desperately trying to squeeze the pain away. I fought hard to remember why I was hurting this much, what I had done to myself this time and where was Edward taking me? But there was nothing. Still feeling the intense pain in my head I inhaled deeply through my nose and I was met with the smell of cigarettes and coffee. That smell triggered something inside my mind and I had a terrifying flashback.

Toilets…darkness...James

As soon as I realised I wasn't with Edward but with James I threw up violently, my head screaming as I moved forward. Immediately a fist connected with my cheek and my head hit the window, making the pain even worse than before.

"It's a new fucking car, Isabella," he growled and then I was struck again.

James was sitting beside me, driving me god knows where and I was alone with him. I felt my stomach spasm and before I could stop myself, I threw up again. He slammed on the brakes and brought us to a sudden stop. I couldn't have been wearing a seatbelt because I was lurched forward and my battered head took another hit on the dashboard. The pain was too much and I retched again, there was nothing left in my stomach now but it didn't stop him from roaring in anger. He released his seatbelt and climbed from the car. I was starting to feel my eyes growing heavy again and willed myself to sleep, anything to escape this nightmare, but the passenger door opened and he pulled me from the car by my hair, and threw me onto the floor. I curled up, and James stooped over me, pressing something cold and hard against my temple.

"Make a fucking sound and you're dead," he hissed and then turned his attention away from me and began to clean the vomit from the car.

I looked around, still dazed and confused but I had no idea where I was. I heard cars passing by but they were travelling too fast to hear me if I did attempt to scream. I started to gasp, my chest felt tight and tears were rolling uncontrollably down my face.

No, Bella. Stop. This is not the time for a panic attack, you need to keep calm and think. You have to get yourself out of this somehow.

I had never seen him like this before. James had always been intense, creepy, and of course he made my life a nightmare but he had never directed any violence towards me, only to other people who angered him. I didn't know what had changed inside him, but I didn't want to hang around to wait and see what he had planned for me. I needed a plan. I could forget running, I didn't trust my legs to even support me if I stood. There was no one around to call out to for help, so I began feeling around on the ground for some kind of weapon.

The cold, hard, blacktop had nothing; no stones, bottles, crushed cans, or even a handful of the sandy grit that usually hugs the edges of the road.

Shoes?

Yes, shoes were good. I reached down with one of my hands, but I soon realised he'd taken no chances and my wrists were bound with plastic tie wrap. It was strange, but as soon as I saw the wraps, I felt the pain. They were tight, too fucking tight, and they were cutting into my skin. I didn't have much room to manoeuvre my hands individually so I attempted to move them both down to grab a shoe. I hadn't moved them more than an inch or two before I saw a foot come into view and press down firmly on my arm.

"Don't even think about it, Isabella." James bent over and wiped my face with a towel, almost tenderly. "You look terrible. If we had more time, I promise I would get a doctor to look at your head, but it doesn't matter now."

He held out a bottle of water and when I refused to drink, he grabbed my face between one finger and thumb and squeezed my mouth open. I couldn't fight back enough to stop him and he poured the water straight into my mouth, I coughed and spluttered and spat it back out and he laughed.

"Do you think I want to kiss you with that shit in your mouth?" he snapped, and moved closer and brought his lips to mine.

"Don't fucking touch me!" I screamed as loud as I could, and he punched me so hard in the jaw that the force made me bite down on to my lip. I winced at the pain and immediately I could feel the blood oozing into my mouth and down my chin. The warm, metallic taste made my stomach tighten again and I fought the bile back down.

"Get up." He didn't wait for me to move; he simply hauled me up by the elbow and shoved me into the car.

As soon as he was back in the driver's seat he turned the engine on and sped away, the tyres squealing against the road as he drove.

"W..w...what do you want?" I cried.

James laughed darkly. "What do I want? Are you fucking kidding me, Iz? What the hell do you think I want? I want what I have always wanted, I want what is mine. I want you, always you, only you." He glanced over at me. "I know you didn't believe my letter, your boyfriend didn't either. If he had then it wouldn't have taken me as long to get to you. But don't you see, Isabella, nothing and no one can keep us apart. Your boyfriend can get people to follow you, your father can send people to find me but it won't work. I win every time."

"You won't win this time," I whispered. "Those people who were sent to follow me and find you are always close by. They will have seen you, James, and the police will be here soon."

"Are you sure about that?" He stopped the car abruptly again and was to my door quickly. "Come and take a look at this." He pulled me from the car and walked me around to the trunk. As it lifted, the light illuminated a lifeless body curled up in the most unnatural position. It was Harry, my father's friend, employee, and my minder. I choked back a scream and my knees gave way. James caught me in his arms and whispered in my ear, "Right about now I expect your boyfriend is running around the hotel trying to find you. If he pays a visit to the men's room, he'll find the other man, Felix I think his name is. You should know better than anyone, Isabella, no one can stop me."

I went limp and let him drag me back to the car. He'd killed two people, killed them because of me, to get to me. "Edward?" I choked, what would happen to him?

"I've been with you all the time, Isabella. It wasn't even me on that flight back to England. I found some desperate, homeless bum who had a similar look to me. I paid him to clean himself up and pretend to be me. I've been there for everything. I saw you together on Christmas Eve at Rockefeller Centre, I saw you flashing your fucking engagement ring at his house in the Hamptons, and I saw him announce his love for you out on the street when he was drunk. You should have known I wouldn't miss a second of your life. I can see you think you love him, but don't you realise that deep down it's me who has your heart and soul? I planned to kill him first, make you watch and suffer as I have, but I had to choose between you and him and you are the reason I am here after all. I couldn't risk you running again; I couldn't spend another two years without you."

He sighed and gripped the wheel of the car tightly, I saw we were approaching the entrance to a bridge and thought for a brief moment I might be presented with an opportunity to escape this or at least draw attention to my situation, bridges had toll booths, toll booths had people, people who could help me. I looked eagerly in front and then my heart sank, there were no toll booths. We were crossing the 59th St. Bridge, a toll free bridge. There would be no help, no escape. It was a strange feeling, but the fear which had been crippling me started to fade and was replaced by fury…blind, uncontrollable fury.

"I hate you. I fucking hate you," I spat.

He looked over at me and shook his head. He punched the steering wheel over and over and then swerved across two lanes to the side of the bridge. He paid no attention to the protests by the other motorists and parked up close to the barriers. He turned to face me and moved as close as he could.

"You need to fucking respect me. I have done nothing but love you for seven fucking years. Isabella, I cherished the ground you walked on and killed for you. How can you be so cold?" I felt my seat begin to recline and the doors locked. He clambered over me and pressed me back into the seat. "I'll show you how to fucking respect me, you bitch."

As soon as he was pressed on top of me I could feel his erection against my leg, it turned my stomach and I struggled against him as he forced his knees between my legs and pried them open, but he was too strong, I was too weak. There was nothing I could do to stop him, not physically at least. He pulled my dress up, ripping it in the process and I felt him begin to open his pants. He pinned me down by my shoulders and moved in to kiss me, when I turned my face away he landed on my ear and then hissed. "You will respect me and you'll fucking enjoy it."

I couldn't let him do this. I had to fight back somehow, so I did it with words. "Do what you want to me, I will probably enjoy it you're right, but only because I'll just close my eyes and pretend it's Edward." I kept my voice cold and determined. He looked up and his nostrils flared. "Although, I may have to imagine there's something with a bit more sustenance down there, I hate to tell you this but Edward is substantially better equipped than you." I immediately felt him soften between my legs and I braced myself for the anger he was about to unleash on me. I would take it, anything except having him inside me.

He began to hit me, my face, my stomach, chest and arms. But his movement was restricted in the car and it didn't have the desired effect. We were still being passed by cars on the bridge and he couldn't remove me from the car without being seen. Instead, he moved his hands to my throat and began to squeeze. It wasn't with enough force to kill me, it was just enough to torture me a little bit more and he smiled as he did it.

"I know what I have to do now, Isabella." He released his hold on my neck and ran his hands up to cup my face. "I have to send you back."

"Back where?" I croaked in confusion.

"Where you came from," he spoke softly and rested his head on mine. I recoiled at his action. That was something that Edward did, I felt a stab of pain as I thought about him. Was he okay, and would he be okay once James was done with me?

"Where? England?"

"No you silly girl. Hell." His eyes bore into me and the smile was still fixed on his face. He was evil, there was nothing wrong with him psychologically, he was just evil through and through.

"What? Get your hands off me." I ignored the pain from my head and struggled furiously against him, screaming as loud as I could, desperately trying to get someone's attention.

He continued to hold me down with his legs and held my head back against the headrest with his hand clamped firmly over my mouth. "Shut up and stop fighting this. I have to send you back, Isabella, you're a creation of the devil and he wants you to come home. Don't worry though, my love, I have a plan and we will go home together.

I was going to die...he was going to kill me. I closed my eyes and more tears escaped. I could beg him, plead with him, maybe even convince him I'd seen the light and did really love him. "James, please don't. I…I…love..."

"You love me? Let's see about that." He kissed me and let his tongue sweep across my lips. I tried to respond, tried to let him in but just the thought of his mouth on mine turned my muscles to stone and I cringed away from him. I couldn't even pretend to want him to save my own life. "I can see it in your eyes, Isabella, there's nothing you can hide from me. You still think you love him and I'm done trying to convince you otherwise. But know this, I will never let him have you, I told you before, you belonged to me and if I can't have you, no one can. Don't worry about Edward Cullen, he'll find someone else quickly enough. He can have anyone he wants and he sure as hell won't waste time mourning you."

He didn't move for a while, he just lay above me, pinning me into the chair, staring into my eyes. I didn't struggle, I needed to let him pass as much time as possible, in the vain hope that someone might stop and see if we were okay, or even just report the car to the police. I thought of Edward, just him and it gave me a sense of relief. At least if James was planning on killing us both now, Edward would be safe, that was the one saving grace in this fucked up nightmare.

The problem was I wasn't ready to lose him. The thought of never seeing him again took me back to the few days we were apart and the pain ripped through me again, taking my breath away. I had been given a chance to live like a normal person with the most amazing man and I was beyond thankful for that. I didn't even care that it was because of our relationship that James had found me and I was in this situation. If everything was to end now it didn't matter. I wouldn't change anything, at least if he was going to kill us both I knew Edward, Alice, Angela, and everyone else who I loved would be free of him too.

Then I heard it, the most beautiful sound in the world to me at that moment. I could hear sirens and James heard it too. He looked up and I saw the reflection of the flashing blue lights on the roof of the car. The dark night emphasized them and I began to scream and struggle again. James swore and leapt across to the driver's side, he went to turn the ignition and then he swore louder and started hitting the steering wheel again. Another set of flashing lights were approaching from the other side of the bridge. He did nothing to stop me screaming or struggling, so I banged against the window and continued to scream. I stopped abruptly when he began to laugh.

"It's too late, Isabella, I won't let you leave me again." He pulled out the gun and rammed it under my chin. I could see sweat beading on his brow and his hand was trembling. He held it there for just a few seconds before he roared loudly, "I can't do it, I can't fucking kill you like that, you're too beautiful, I want you just as you are now but I won't let them take you, Isabella, I will have to do it another way." he looked around and then smiled. There was a shift in his demeanour and I could see he had relaxed again. "Let's take a walk."

He climbed over the seat and pushed me out of the door first, I fell to the floor and saw the police car parked up close by, two uniformed officers emerging slowly from inside with the lights still flashing silently on the top of the car. I tried to move towards them but I was quickly brought to my feet and James' arm wrapped around my neck. His other hand held the gun firmly against my temple. At the sight of the gun the two police men drew their weapons and took cover behind the doors of the vehicle.

"Stay where you fucking are and tell that other car to back off. I'll shoot her. I swear to God I'll shoot her right here." He began to back us towards the railing and at that moment I realised exactly what he was planning to do.

As he stopped with his back pressed firmly against the railings, one of the police officers lowered his weapon and stood with his hands raised. "Sir, please." He slowly moved closer and held his hand up to stop the other car which was idling close by. "You don't want to do this. You don't want to hurt your girl, do you?"

"My girl? Try telling her that." James laughed and kept the gun pressed against me. The officer went to speak again but James cut him off sharply. "Shut your fucking mouth and get back."

I felt him slowly climb over the railing, somehow, keeping me pressed tightly against him. He was pulling on me, and I soon felt the cold of the metal against my back. If he jumped now I couldn't do anything, his grip was so tight around me he'd pull me over the railing with him.

I tried to struggle but it was useless. "Please help me," I begged the officer and he stepped forward again.

I saw through the wind shield of the other car, an officer talking on his radio. James never moved a muscle, never spoke to me or to the police. He was murmuring, singing and I recognised it at once.

"It's been so lonely without you here, like a bird without a song.

Nothing can stop these lonely tears from falling.

Tell me baby, where did I go wrong."

"Please, don't do this." My hands were still bound in front of me, I couldn't move them to get a grip on the barrier to at least try and prevent the fall. He didn't acknowledge me. He just continued to quietly sing his song to no one in particular.

I could hear the sounds of helicopter blades, whipping through the air and they grew louder and louder. James heard them too, and he stopped singing instantly.

"I told you to keep people away. Did you think I wouldn't do it? Did you think I wouldn't follow through? She's mine and I won't let her live without me." He leaned down and kissed my ear. "Don't be afraid, it will all be over quickly I promise. Just remember I love you and we will be together soon."

I saw the officer's face fall in horror at the same time as James' grip tightened on me. He fell backwards and I could feel him pulling the top of my body with him. The officer lunged forward to grab me but it was too late, my legs rose up and over the barrier and I began to fall. I did feel a snatch on my ankle but my forward motion was too great and it did nothing to stop me, the only thing it did do was slow me enough to rip me from James' hold. It was a strange experience and time seemed to stand still as I fell. It was utterly terrifying and I knew I needed to at least try and hit the water feet first. I tried to bring them down but with my hands fixed firmly in front of me it was difficult, I was still fighting when I heard the sound of something impacting the water below. Just a second later I felt my feet strike the surface and shooting, agonising pains shot upwards through my legs, the water enveloped me and the freezing temperature felt like I was being stabbed all over my body. By some god given miracle I was still conscious, but maybe that was worse, because now I was going to drown. I couldn't swim to the surface, I tried to kick my legs, but the battering my body had taken debilitated me and I couldn't even work out which direction the surface was. I struggled and struggled but I began to feel the darkness closing in, nothing I did made any difference. I wasn't getting out of this, James had always said he wouldn't let me live without him and he had finally achieved it. My lungs were screaming and my body took an involuntary breath in desperation, the icy water burned my throat, flooded my chest and sank me lower beneath the surface. I didn't want to die, not like this but I had no more fight left and as the darkness engulfed me I clung onto the thought of just one thing.

Edward.

A/N Because I hate leaving you wonderful people hanging, I am going to try and get the next chapter posted tonight…it may be a few hours before I get chance but I promise I will try!

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing.

Only four more chapters after this…

Katy

xxx