A/N: Thank you for the encouraging comments on the last chapter. This one has one of my favourite Robb/Ailsa moments so I hope you enjoy :)

Thanks: KelseyBl, everyone else who follows & anyone else who's reading :)

Struggle and Strength

I could hear the baby crying in the darkness and I tried to make my legs move so I could reach it but my feet felt like lead as I tried with all my strength to move. The cries were growing fainter and I managed to move a few steps as desperation filled my heart, I could barely hear the cries now. I snatched out my arms in the darkness but I could feel nothing. I could see nothing. I could hear nothing. I cried out and in the next second my eyes flew open and I realised that I was in my bed. "Ailsa?" I heard Robb ask sleepily, his hand coming to my cheek as I tried to control my breathing. He sighed heavily, his lips kissing my forehead gently; "it was a dream," he soothed, "just a dream." I grabbed him closer then, pulling his lips to mine, frustration building up in me as I felt the hesitation in the way he kissed me. I moved one hand to his laces and tried to undo them but his hand stilled mine in an instant; "Ailsa stop," he said gently, but firmly.

"Why?" I asked, stung at his rejection; "don't you want me?"

"Of course I want you … but not like this," he explained.

"But I need you," I whispered, tears filling my eyes again.

"I'm right here," he whispered back, pulling me against my chest.

"I wish I could stop feeling like this," I confessed after a moment and he kissed the top of my head.

"It will take time Ailsa … it has only been a few days," he soothed.

"Do you still love me?" I asked fearfully.

"Of course I still love you! Why would you even ask that?" he replied disbelievingly.

"I failed … I let you down," I whispered.

"You have never let me down, don't ever think that. What happened was an accident, it was not your fault do you understand me?" he said fiercely. I managed to nod my head, not trusting myself to speak as tears were falling from my eyes again. Robb's arms tightened around me and I felt him place another kiss atop my head and I let my eyes close, hoping that this time I would not dream.

It took a few more days before I felt that I had the strength to keep my emotions in check long enough for me to go to the nursery. I took a deep breath, steeling myself before I pushed open the door. "Mama!" Ned's bright voice sounded through the room and I felt myself smile as he came towards me, his arms outstretched. Robb had looked around at Ned's greeting and he caught my eye and smiled as I pulled my son up into my arms and planted a kiss on his forehead. He smiled widely at me and I held him against my chest, inhaling his perfect scent, thinking that I had been far too long without him. It wasn't long before he was squirming in my arms, desperate for his feet to be back on the floor so he could continue playing with his toys. I crossed over to where Robb was sitting with Alienna once I had put Ned down and he offered her up to me. "You have grown," I breathed as I held her in my arms, she smiled at me and I moved one hand to twist one of her golden curls around my fingers.

She smiled more widely and I noticed that a few more teeth were threatening to poke through her gums, Robb tugged on my skirts then and I looked at him. "Come here," he smiled and I did as he bid me, settling myself and Alienna down in his lap, his arms coming around us as she lay her golden head down against my chest. Robb and I watched Ned in silence for a while as Alienna slowly began drifting off to sleep in my arms. "What are you building Ned?" Robb asked once she was sound asleep. Ned looked up at his father's question and merely grinned widely before placing more blocks on his creation. "Is it Winterfell?" Robb persisted and I smiled as Ned shook his head. "What is it then?" Robb questioned and Ned said something nonsensical in return making me laugh lightly. "Can't say I've heard of it," Robb said with smile before turning his eyes to me. "What?" I asked him after a moment.

"It's been too long since I heard you laugh," he told me seriously.

"I should have come sooner," I said, "I should have known they'd make me feel better"

"And do you feel better?" he asked.

"I'll get there," I promised him and he nodded, leaning his head down against my shoulder.

I insisted on seeing Jaime the next day, Robb protested for the longest time but eventually he gave in to my demands but insisted on coming with me. I didn't mind too much and let him lead me down the steep steps, my hand clutching his arm tightly; he looked at me concernedly when we reached the bottom and I managed to smile slightly and nod at him. When we reached Jaime's cell I noticed that a proper bed had been put in there, it also looked like he had more furs and blankets as well as some candles for light. "Little Queen," his familiar greeting sounded after a moment as he swung his legs off the bed and came towards the bars. I tried to smile and he looked at me sceptically; "I came to thank you," I said quietly after a moment.

"You didn't have to … I know you have other things on your mind," he said, glancing warily at Robb.

"Yes," I agreed softly, stepping closer to him, "but you saved me … you didn't have to"

"I promised," he said simply and I reached my hand through the bars to take his.

"I will never forget what you did for me," I promised, not moving my eyes from his.

"I'm only sorry it wasn't enough," he said seriously.

"That wasn't your fault," I whispered, blinking rapidly as tears threatened to fall.

"No … but I am still sorry," he said.

"Thank you," I managed to smile as he squeezed my hand gently. Robb and I left in silence not long after, he didn't speak until we emerged in the courtyard; "I never believed he actually cared for you," he said disbelievingly and I looked up at him. "All this time," Robb continued, "all this time I thought he was playing a game, playing with you … but … he actually cares for you"

"You understand now?" I asked him softly and he looked down into my eyes.

"Yes," he replied; "I understand now."

I felt better after seeing Jaime and decided that I would go to dinner for the first time since my fall; I knew my absence would have been noticed but Robb assured me that no one knew the real reason I had stayed away. I was glad of it, I didn't want anyone else to know about my miscarriage, it was bad enough Osha and the Maester had to know, no one had known about my pregnancy and Robb and I had agreed that that was how it should stay. "Are you feeling better?" Lady Stark asked me as I sat down next to her.

"Yes," I smiled, "it was just a slight chill that's all … I feel much better now"

"I'm glad," she smiled back at me and I let myself relax in my chair. I didn't notice Robb come in right away as I was too busy laughing at a joke that Arya had told us; "let me guess … Gendry told you it?" I questioned, brushing tears of laughter from my cheeks as Robb dropped into his seat.

"How did you know?" Arya asked through her own laughter.

"Because of how crude it was no doubt!" Lady Stark said, trying to sound stern.

"Well what do you expect, he is from Fleabottom," Arya explained and I burst into another fit of laughter, turning away from her to try and calm myself. I felt Robb's hand take mine as I took a few deep breaths, managing to stop my giggles I finally turned to look at him. He smiled widely at me but I saw the underlying fear in his eyes and it sobered me at once. "What is it?" I asked him.

"I'm sorry," he said heavily, "I can't put the Lords off any longer"

"You're riding out again," I guessed.

"Next week," he confirmed and I managed to smile for him, squeezing his hand reassuringly.

"I hope you will not leave before Sansa arrives," Lady Stark said and Robb snapped his head to her.

"Sansa's coming?" he asked sharply.

"Yes," Lady Stark confirmed, "I was waiting until we were all together to tell you … her and Theon will arrive late next week if it goes to plan." Robb didn't say anything, his eyes merely searched for mine and I didn't need to ask to know why he was so aghast at the thought of her coming. I tightened my hand in his and nodded at his silent question of whether or not I was alright. "She will be growing big with child now," I commented to Lady Stark who nodded to me happily.

"Yes indeed … I cannot believe I will soon have another Grandchild," she smiled happily.

"You must be glad indeed," I said, smiling to her before reaching out to take a drink of wine.

I could feel Robb's eyes on me as I undressed that night and I knew he was worrying about me again, truly I was glad that Sansa and Theon were coming, they would be a welcome distraction indeed from Robb's departure. I pulled my night slip on and turned to walk towards him, he smiled at me as I pulled back the sheets and climbed into bed, snuggling against his chest at once and feeling his strong arms circle me. "Tell me something," he said quietly after a few moments of silence.

"What do you want me to tell you?" I asked.

"A story," he said after a minute.

"What kind of story?" I questioned, smiling against him.

"Tell me who you dreamed of marrying when you were a girl," he said after thinking for a while.

"A knight," I told him.

"Not a Lord?!" he asked in a scandalised tone and I couldn't help but laugh.

"No, a knight," I confirmed and I felt him run a hand through my hair.

"Handsome no doubt," he muttered.

"Very," I smiled, lifting my head to look at him.

"Won every tourney," he guessed and I nodded, smiling widely at the look on his face.

"Across the whole of Westeros," I elaborated, "and after he won the final one he dropped to his knees in front of my father and begged him for my hand, saying he could love no one but me and that he would surely die without me"

"He sounds dramatic," Robb commented and I laughed again.

"He was a knight, of course he was dramatic!" I said and it was Robb's turn to laugh.

"And what did your father say?" he asked.

"Yes of course … how could he ever refuse his little girl?" I replied.

"I think I may have that problem with Alienna," he sighed after a moment and I nodded my agreement.

"What about you?" I asked after a minute.

"What about me?" he replied.

"Who did you dream of marrying?" I questioned, lightly trailing my fingers across his chest.

"You," he told me and I shook my head.

"No! Before I came to Winterfell … who?" I insisted.

"I am telling you, I only ever dreamed of marrying you!" he said insistently and I frowned at him, unsure if he was telling me the truth; "honestly," he added, clearly seeing the doubt on my face.

"You never dreamed up a wife?" I asked.

"No," he said, shaking his head, "I knew I would be married one day being my father's heir but I never thought of it. Before you came to Winterfell all I thought about was beating my brothers at swordplay and archery," he continued and I smiled widely at him.

"And then I came," I said softly.

"And then you came," he agreed, stroking a lock of my hair behind my ears; "and I have been a terrible shot ever since"

"Don't be silly," I giggled.

"It's true!" he insisted, "Theon beats me at archery every time … if I was a bowman I would be cursing you. But luckily for you I always preferred the sword," he finished and I smiled at him.

"I am lucky indeed," I agreed with him, looking into his beautiful blue eyes for the longest time.

"You would not prefer your knight?" he asked teasingly.

"I was a foolish girl dreaming of a knight when I should have been dreaming of a King," I replied softly.

"And what King would this be?" Robb questioned, raising his eyebrows.

"You have not heard of him?" I replied, "He is strong and brave and has never lost in battle, the most handsome King in the North," I finished, pulling myself further up his chest.

"If I were your knight I would be worried about this King in the North," Robb said softly.

"With good reason," I whispered before leaning down and capturing his lips with mine.

He kissed me back softly but I could sense he was still hesitant and so I ran my hand across his jawline, deepening our kiss as I did so, letting my other hand trail down his chest. His own hands were around my waist, holding my body close to him but not wandering it as they usually would. When my hand brushed his laces I felt his muscles tense beneath me and he broke our kiss and looked me dead in the eyes. "Let me Robb," I breathed and he frowned slightly at me, I gazed back intently until the creases in his forehead smoothed away and I smiled, capturing his lips again and letting my hand slowly unthread his laces. He made no move to stop me this time although his hands stayed securely on my waist and I knew he was still not completely certain that we should be doing this. "Robb," I murmured against his lips; "I want you to make love to me," I told him softly and after a moment his hands finally wandered from their place on my waist to pull up the silk of my night slip.

I pulled myself astride him carefully, breaking our kiss so I could shift myself above him and lower myself onto the length of him. He breathed out deeply as I slid down him, his hands running up and down my legs for a moment before he pulled himself up to face me. I moved against him slowly as his hands came to my shoulders and slid down the straps of my night slip, his hands wandering gently across my breasts as I continued my movements, gasping as his touch made the fire inside me burn even brighter. He pulled me closer to him as our ending neared, our hot bodies melting so deliciously together, his lips at my neck as I cried out my final pleasure. His hands came to my hips, encouraging my movements for a few moments longer before he too groaned out his release against my shoulder. I tangled my hands in his hair as he kissed his way softly back towards my lips, moving his with mine softly for the longest time, our bodies still pressed tightly together. Finally he broke the kiss and looked so deeply into my eyes that I was certain he was staring right at my soul; "I love you," he told me after the longest time.

"And I love you," I replied, my eyes not moving from his.

Sansa and Theon arrived the day before Robb was due to leave, we stood in the courtyard waiting to greet them as the sound of hooves pierced the air. Robb's hand was tight around mine and I took a few steadying breaths as the small party clattered into view. Theon was off his horse in an instant, reaching up and helping Sansa from hers, his hands steadying her as her feet came to the ground. I watched as she smiled to him and took his arm before they walked towards us, stopping just short and dropping into a curtsey and a bow. Lady Stark was first forward to embrace Sansa, exclaiming about how well she looked, Robb dropped my hand so he could embrace first Theon and then his sister. I stepped forward last, like Robb embracing Theon first before moving to Sansa as Robb moved away from her. She certainly did look well and I held her tightly for a moment, before stepping back to look at her properly; her stomach was rounded and her cheeks flushed as she smiled at me. "You look so well," I told her honestly; "how are you feeling?"

"I feel well … it was so strange at first, being with child, but now … it is just the best feeling," she gushed and I caught Robb's eye for a moment and smiled reassuringly at him.

"Let's get you inside," Theon said, coming to her side and taking her hand.

"Yes," Lady Stark agreed, "you must be in need of a rest." Lady Stark led the way inside followed closely by Theon and Sansa, Robb and I moved last and he took my hand securely and slowed our pace so we were out of earshot. "Are you sure you're alright with this?" he asked me quietly.

"I'm fine Robb," I assured him.

"I know it can't be easy for you," he murmured.

"I lost our baby," I whispered, looking up to meet his eyes, "but that does not mean I cannot be happy for Sansa and Theon," I finished and he smiled at me.

"I sometimes forget how strong you are," he commented as we entered the keep.

"It's because I know I have you by my side," I told him with a smile.

We all lined up in the courtyard again the next afternoon to see Robb and his men safely away, Ned was even with us, holding tightly onto my skirts as Robb walked towards me for his blessing. He knelt at my feet and I placed my hand on his head at once; "do I go with your blessing my Queen?" he asked me and I managed to smile.

"I give you my blessing gladly your Grace," I replied as I always did before taking my hand away so he could rise to his feet again, "stay safe," I added in an undertone and he nodded.

"I love you," he whispered and it was my turn to nod.

"I love you too," I said softly and he smiled once more to me before turning away.

"Papa!" Ned shouted out, toddling towards Robb's retreating back before I could grab him back. Thankfully the Lords laughed as Robb turned in surprise and scooped him up into his arms; "you are a little too young for war," Robb told him lightly, kissing his forehead before walking back towards me. "You have to stay and take care of your mother for me alright?" Robb said with a smile and I felt myself smile as Ned nodded his head seriously. "Good," Robb said happily, passing Ned into my arms and smiling for us both, ruffling Ned's hair before again turning to walk to his horse. I placed a kiss of my own to the top of Ned's head as Robb pulled himself up and kicked his horse into motion. "Wave to Papa," I told Ned quietly as Robb turned his head to us. He did as I bid him and I saw Robb's face light up and I sent a smile of my own to him, nodding my head slightly before he rode under the gate and out of sight.

A/N: Hope you enjoyed that, I love writing the scenes with the children, especially as Ned has some words now!

Next chapter has a rather AU big event - just to prepare you all!