EDITED

Catherine's POV

Sitting on the couch I continue to stare at the photo of Sara in my hands. I can no longer feel the tears pouring down my face, but I know they are there. His body against hers. His lips on hers. Anger sears through me. Grissom has some nerve, and to think I ever called him a friend. Then Sara…Sara, how could she do this to me? I thought we were being honest with each other. How could she not tell me what Grissom has been putting her through? I trusted her. I told her I loved her.

I knew… I knew that something like this would happen. I told Sara I loved her despite the protests of my mind and heart, because I do love her and I always will. Sometimes though, sometimes, I wonder if that love will be enough. I've wanted this for so long, but it seems like when we are together it is nothing but drama with brief periods of respite. Will things ever settle down? Do I really want them to?

My whole body aches with emotions. I wish I was numb. I wish I could crawl into a corner and wait for everything to pass.

My phone vibrates twice in my pocket before falling silent. Looking at it I find I have a new text from Lindsay. Opening it I read, Is Sara ok?

Hitting reply I write, What r u talking about?

I wait. After a few minutes my phone vibrates again. My eyes skim the message. She was standin outside when J & I left this mornin. That was two hours ago. Sara wouldn't still be there. Would she? Getting up I make my way into the kitchen and peer through the window over the sink. My eyes land on Sara. She is hugging herself tightly, and wearing a mixture of emotions on her face that include lost, confused, and defeated.

Walking to the front door I freeze with my hand on the doorknob. I rest my forehead against cool wood and try to pull myself together. All I succeed in doing though is creating more tears. Part of me doesn't want Sara to see me so vulnerable. But the other part of me wants her to see what she does to me. Wants her to see so that she will suffer for what she has done by refusing to talk to me.

Opening the door Sara jumps in surprise. We lock eyes. Tears are streaming down her face and I want to rush over to her. To hold her in my arms and comfort her, but I fight back the impulse. Instead I turn around and go back into the living room. I leave the door open for Sara to follow me when she feels like it.

I sit on the couch and wonder if I should have waited for Sara to come in. I wonder if she will run, or if she will have the strength to face me.

She has always had such a big heart. She has cared for everyone, and done everything she could for them for as long as can remember. That heart, the way that she gives anybody kindness without questions, how she is willing to love people unconditionally in her own way, is a big part of why I fell in love with her. I've always wished I could be like Sara, so kind, so strong, and after everything I have learned about her I wish that ten times more.

The front door closes and my heart skips a beat before I am filled with relief. We might have the chance to talk this out. To fix it.

For the first time I realize how far we have both come since this all started and I am proud of us. I am reassured that our love for one another will be enough even if times are rough.

Sara cautiously enters the room and takes a seat next to me. "What happened Sara?" I ask quietly.

"I don't know really… Grissom was giving me a hard time. He was standing close to me so I backed up, but he kept moving closer to me. The next thing I knew I was trapped and his lips were on mine. All I could think about was how you said you loved me, and how I had to get out of his arms. All I could hear were your heels clicking as you came closer…and then you walked in…"

"Why didn't you tell me what was going on?"

"I saw everything you were already dealing with and I didn't want to give you anymore to think about." She looks at me for the first time. Her gaze forces me to look away. I note her split knuckles the smeared blood on her arms.

Before I can say anything her lips crash into mine. Roughly I tangle my fingers in my hair and pull her closer. Her tongue enters my mouth and I tease it with my own. Her hands are traveling down my body. Brushing the underside of my breast. Running down my sides causing me to squirm.

She stands and yanks my shirt off. Grabbing my wrists she pulls me up and captures my lips in another bruising kiss. I begin to lead Sara toward the bedroom. I press myself into her and moan at the feeling of our bodies coming together. Sara lets go of my wrists involuntarily and I move my hands to her hips. I slide my fingers under her shirt and dig my nails into the soft flesh beneath fabric. A deep groan escapes Sara. She kisses my neck. Soon teeth scrape my skin and quickly Sara begins to add more pressure. I have no doubt there will be marks there tomorrow but I like it. I moan and lose myself in the sensation.

My mind doesn't know what to process the touches, or the moment, or the longing. I am partially brought back to reality when Sara slams me against the wall. She pins my wrist above my head. I turn my head to the side. Cool wood relieves my burning skin. I long to turn around and touch Sara but she has me trapped. Her teeth graze the back of my shoulders. I strain to see her. When our eyes lock a stream of heat rushes downward. Her eyes are black with desire.

Her lips meet mine. I explore her mouth. She bites my lip until she draws blood. I whimper at the new flavor mixed with Sara's salty tears, and the unique taste. She grinds into my ass. I don't recall losing my pants but I have. Again I am struggling to stay in the present. My senses are on over drive again.

Suddenly Sara is gone. I turn around and find her standing in the middle of the hallway watching me. Her eyes are filled with a mixture of lust and love. Slowly I move toward her. Adding an extra swing to my hips I notice her eyes flicker downward. I press our bodies together and move her so she backed is against the wall. I kiss down her neck and then move back up to her pulse point and suck on the exposed flesh I find there. With eager hands I remove her shirt. I leave a trail of bite marks down her neck and the closer I get to her fabric concealed breasts the harder I bite. Sara moans quietly in encouragement.

I begin to work on unbuttoning her pants. Sara has a hand in my hair and the other cups my ass. I get frustrated when I can't get her pants' button undone because I am becoming increasingly distracted by the circles Sara is tracing closer and closer to where I want her hands.

A low chuckle comes from Sara and she places her hands on top of mine and winks at me. She escapes from her place against the wall and walks toward the bedroom. I admire the way her hips sway as she walks and how great her ass looks in those jeans as I follow her. When she reaches my bedroom her pants drop and pool around her ankles before she steps out of them. My jaw drops and I freeze. Sara Sidle is wearing a thong and is giving me a great view of her tight, nicely toned ass.

She disappears into my room and I quickly try to calm myself down before walking into the room. Sara is sitting on the edge of the bed. Her bra is now somewhere on the floor. She looks at me with shyness. Her expression melts my heart and turns me on at the same time. "Do you know what you do to me Sara?" I ask. My voice is low and husky. Her dark pools twinkle.

Standing between her legs I gaze at her. I push her back so that she is lying on the bed. Dragging my nails down her sides she hisses as she arches her back. I hook my fingers around the string of Sara's thong and take the item off. Taking in the dark curls I allow my eyes to wander up creamy skin to light brown, erect nipples. Moving closer to Sara I groan when I feel her warm wetness against my lower stomach. It takes all my strength to not come at this sensation. I start to knead Sara's breasts. Her nipples strain against my hands. I can hear ragged breathing. I kiss and lick up her stomach.

Sara's hands snake around my back and unhook my bra. Stopping what I am doing I slowly slide each strap down my arms and then let the garment drop. I watch Sara whose eyes are transfixed on me. She lets out a quiet, "wow," under her breath and I smile before continuing my exploration of Sara's body.

I want to get under her skin. I want to make her tumble over the edge. I long for the connection between us. For the moment when we go from being two to becoming one. I need her to know just how special she is to me and exactly how much she means to me. "Cath."

I look up at Sara. She pulls herself up into the middle of the bed and pats the spot next to her. I crawl up to her and straddle her. She kisses me forcefully and flips us so that I am trapped beneath her. I rest my hands on her toned arms as she hovers over me. I can feel the muscles beneath my fingers twitching with the strain of holding her whole body up.

Sara's nipples brush over mine. My skin is on fire and between my legs is throbbing. Sara makes her way down my body. Her hands, tongue, and lips are now on my breasts. She pinches and twists my nipples roughly but at the same time gently.

Moving her mouth down my stomach she dips her tongue into my belly button. I moan out her name and she stops. Opening my eyes I gaze at her in confusion.

She returns to hovering over me. She pushes her leg against my core and I whimper at the sudden friction I have been longing for. I move my leg between hers and begin to grind against her leg. I know I can't hold back much longer.

I can feel Sara's swollen lips brush my leg. She is velvety and warm. She begins to move faster and adds more pressure to her movements. I match her pace as I rub against her leg. As I run my fingernails down her spine Sara emits a small moan.

Sara starts to shake and I let go. Intense pleasure washes over me. Arching into Sara I dig my nails into her back as I try to get as close to her as possible. I call out her name as she shakes silently above me and bites into my shoulder.

Sara collapses beside me and I turn to face her. She is breathing as heavily as am I. I kiss her passionately and she wraps her arms around me. She rests her forehead on mine. "I love you," I whisper to her between breaths.

"I love you too. I'm so sorry Cath."

I shake my head. "Don't apologize just promise that you will talk to me next time."

"I will," she replies quietly. I tuck her hair behind her ear and brush my lips against hers.

My eyelids are becoming heavy. I continue to gaze into Sara's eyes and watch as she struggles to keep of sleep too. She rolls onto her back and I snuggle into her side and rest my head on her chest. I listen to her breathing and wait for the rise and fall of her chest to lull me to sleep.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Opening my eyes I groan as afternoon light meets them. Glancing at the clock I know I should get up because Lindsay and Jay will be home soon. Sara is pressed against my back and my body instantly reacts to her touch. I realize that our clothes are left wherever we dropped them and I need to pick them up before the girls get home.

Being careful not to wake Sara I get out of bed and grab my robe. I go into the hallway and begin to pick up clothes.

When I am pretty sure I have everything I go back into the bedroom. I put all of our clothes in a pile and pick out fresh clothes before I go into the bathroom and turn on the shower.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I hear the bedroom door open as I finish brushing my teeth. When I walk into the room I find Lindsay frozen in place just inside the room. Her eyes are locked on Sara. I glance at Sara. She is lying on her back and covered from the waist down. Her nipples are hard as the cold room air bites at her skin. She has an arm thrown over her eyes and she is quietly snoring. A small smile creeps onto my face before I remember that Lindsay is in the room.

I turn my attention back to her at the same time she focuses on me. Our eyes lock and she blushes deeply before hurrying out of the room. "Shit," I mumble.

I move over to the bed and sit on the edge of it. I caress Sara's face. "Babe wake up." She groans and rolls so that her back is facing me. "Sara."

"Mmmm." I pull myself further onto the bed and lean over her so that I can see her face.

"Wake up."

"I don't want to," she says sleepily. I chuckle.

"I know you don't, but you have to. I think we might have just embarrassed Lindsay. Well maybe it was only me but…"

"What'd you do?"

"I caught her staring at you."

"So?"

"You're naked." Her hand darts out from under the covers and she runs it over her bare stomach.

"Shit."

"Get up."

"I will. Talk to her." I sigh and get up.

I close the door being me when I leave the room. Walking into the kitchen I find Lindsay searching through the cupboards for a snack. "There's ice cream in the freezer." I tell her.

She glances at me and then moves to the freezer and takes out the ice cream. I start the coffee machine and stand next to Lindsay who is leaning against the counter waiting for the ice cream to thaw. "Where's Jay?"

"Hanging out with friends somewhere," Lindsay says quietly. I can tell that she is in a bad mood.

"Oh. Who?"

"I don't know. Friends." I nod my head. "So you and Sara…"

"Yeah…ummm…" I have no clue what to say. How am I supposed to talk to my daughter about having sex with Sara.

"I didn't mean to stare. I was just surprised that's all."

"It's fine. I don't think Sara cares either."

"Good."

"Is everything alright?"

"Yeah, I just had a bad day."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really."

"Okay." I kiss Lindsay on the head before grabbing two mugs out of the cupboard. The room is silent as I prepare coffee and Lindsay scoops out her ice cream. Once she has put everything away Lindsay gets a spoon and leaves the room.

I sigh. That was the most awkward conversation that we've had in a long time. I know that Lindsay is holding back, but I don't know why and I don't know how to get her to talk to me.

I hear footsteps and Sara's arms snake around my waist. I turn in her arms and send her a small smile. I notice the marks on her neck, "You know Sara, and you really shouldn't let your girlfriend mark up your neck like that, because it is almost impossible to cover without making things obvious."

She raises and eyebrow, "I didn't have much of a choice." She smiles and kisses me. " I was thinking," She places another small kiss on my lips. "Why don't we both take the night off and go out to dinner?"

A grin spreads across my face, "I would love to."

TBC...