I just want to start the chapter off with a SMUT WARNING because it gets bad (or good, depending on your viewpoint). I'm blushing while I post this. I'm going to put two line breaks before/after so if you wanna skip feel free.

Anyway, now that that's taken care of, here is your part two. Remember that I am working on my Jem personality, so bare with me please. Also, I'm sorry there's so much going on. Like I said before all of this got way out of hand and so many things wanted to be revealed at once and stories needed to be told, so yeah.

Sorry if it sucks. Lemme know either way, I love to get your reviews :D

Chapter 38 How to Get Rid of Skeletons pt 2:

Jem POV:

"You made it out after all." I said to a wide eyed Tessa who'd just walked into the kitchen. She was dressed in a long black and red dress made from varying amounts of lace and velvet, her rich brown hair spilling over her shoulders in ringlets.

"Oh, um yes. Camille convinced me. I didn't realize she was planning on coming here. And she's my ride so I'm kind of stuck." She stood awkwardly in the doorway, biting her thumbnail, looking like she wanted to be anywhere other than here.

"You used to date Will, right?" Based on Magnus's statement and her reluctance it didn't take a genius to put two and two together.

"Yes." Her teeth worried at her bottom lip.

"There's no need to look so nervous, I don't bite." She looked so upset I didn't want to just leave her there so I motioned to one of the empty wooden chairs for her to sit down.

"Can I get you something to drink? There's...everything you could imagine."

"I'll just have a glass of water, thank you." She took a seat and I poured us each a glass of water and sat down across from her, handing over her drink.

We sat in silence while Batman came in, grabbed three beers, and walked back out.

"I should-" I began, meaning to make my way back to Alec and Will and out of this awkward kitchen since she didn't seem in the mood to talk.

"Is he happy?" Tessa spoke at the same time as me and her out of the blue question halted my words. She blushed at her own forwardness.

I thought about how to answer that before I spoke again, not wanting to upset her, but not wanting to lie either. From what little Will had told me about his relationship with the girl, I could assume that he wasn't when they were together.

"Generally, yes. So far as I know." It seemed like a diplomatic enough answer.

She took a deep breath before replying.

"That's good. He deserves to be happy."

She looked down at her glass for such a long pause that I thought maybe I should get up and leave, but finally she spoke again.

"How long have you two... I'm sorry I'm being nosy." She chastised herself, shaking her head.

"It's fine. We've been dating for about a month now." Was that really it? It seemed like so much longer.

"Oh, good luck then. I hope you're a patient man Jem...?"

"Carstairs. And what is that supposed to mean?" Her depressing tone was turning bitter and as much as I didn't want her to be upset, I would rather it to hearing her speak cruelly about Will.

I should go back in the living room.

"I didn't mean for that to sound so horrid, I just mean that Will takes patience sometimes. He's...been through a lot and I know at times it was like pulling teeth trying to get him to open up just a little."

That wasn't the Will I knew; at least not entirely. Maybe my policy of not prying made him more comfortable than feeling like he was being forced to share. Or perhaps he just wasn't comfortable talking to her. Either way, there didn't seem to be an honest reply to her statement that wouldn't hurt her feelings so I sidestepped.

"Why are you telling me this? Not that I don't appreciate the warning, it's just a little strange isn't it?"

She blushed and looked back down at her hands.

"Magnus said he hasn't really been with anyone else since we broke up and I just... We weren't good for each other… emotionally, Will and I, but I still care about him. He was my best friend before we started going out and now we don't even talk. I guess I'm just hoping that maybe you can repair the damage our relationship caused, since he won't let me do it."

I had no idea what to say to that. Will would not ok with this conversation, but I couldn't just get up and leave now.

It would be a lot easier if I knew the whole story though, and Will's side of it.

"I'm sorry, this is not the time or place for this conversation. I didn't mean to-"

"No it's fine, I just really don't know what to say. What is it that you think needs fixing?" I shouldn't have asked. As soon as it came out of my mouth I wanted to take it back. It wasn't my business and if Will wanted me to know any of this he would tell me.

"I don't know- look I shouldn't have said anything."

"Said anything about what?" Will's less than happy voice rang from the doorway.

Fuck.

"Tessa was just warning me of how terribly you snore after you've been drinking. I'm contemplating making you sleep on the terrace." I lied, smiling while I stood and walked over to him.

His face told me he didn't buy it for an instant, but he let it drop nonetheless.

"Lovely. Well I'm sorry to steal away your new companion, but Jem and I are headed out." He told her brusquely.

Tessa stood up, but didn't come any closer.

"Don't let me ruin your night, let me go get Camille and we'll leave, we shouldn't even be here anyway."

"No, it's fine. I have to get up early anyway. You should stay. Go hang out with your friends." Will instructed, almost toneless.

Since when is noon having to get up early?

The silence that stretched on was painfully awkward and I desperately wanted to get out of there.

"I'll go grab our jackets." I suggested, trying to walk past Will out the door. He grabbed my hand and squeezed tightly, not letting me go without him.

"Goodbye Tess." Will turned to go and I offered a weak smile to a very shocked and sad looking Tessa before following after.

Will left the house without going back to his room, walking purposefully in the direction of my apartment without bothering to look behind him to verify that I was even following. I gave him a few moments to cool off (both figuratively and literally as it couldn't possibly have been more than forty five degrees out) before falling in to pace next to him, letting our shoulders brush together. He practically jumped at the contact.

"Are you planning on talking to me again or shall we continue this brooding, storming-off-in-silence-routine for the next twenty minutes?"

"What makes you think I would start talking to you again once we reached your apartment building?"

"Nothing. It just wouldn't be storming off anymore. It would be brooding-teeth-brushing-in-silence and brooding-snuggling-in-silence..."

I trailed off at Will's eye rolling glare.

"I would not be snuggling you while brooding." He said seriously, though I caught the flash of a smile as he turned his head away quickly.

I forcibly removed his hand from his pocket and held it in mine.

"Do you want to talk about what happened back there?" I risked asking. I wasn't entirely sure his explanation would be something I wanted to hear, but it needed to be talked about. Whatever he was feeling over her needed to be addressed.

"Are you going to tell me what she was really apologizing for when I walked in?"

"Possibly. I really don't enjoy being in the middle of peoples affairs." This is exactly why I shouldn't have sat down and talked to her. Where was the line between keeping a confidence and hiding things from my boyfriend?

"Then maybe you shouldn't go around consorting with ex-girlfriends." He replied with a bit too much sass for my liking.

"I did nothing of the sort. I was getting something to drink and she came in, what was I supposed to do? Yell at her to leave?" I was growing exasperated.

"Yes."

"William." I said flatly.

"Fine, no. But you could have left. You don't need to be talking to her."

"Excuse me? When did you start deciding who I talk to?" I stopped walking and forced Will to look at me. I get that he was upset, but that was going a bit far.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. Can we not do this right now?"

"What is it that we're doing?"

Will rubbed his forehead and took a deep breath before replying. Hopefully considering his words more carefully than before.

"James, I don't want to fight with you because of this, but I'm really not in a mood to deal with what just happened. Can we please just let it go for now?" His eyes were absolutely heartbreaking, but luckily for me living with Alec for three years had inoculated me against big blue eyes and avoidance issues. (And apparently made me a magnet to them.)

"No Will. I'm sorry, but no. Whatever it is that you need to deal with needs to be dealt with now or it's going to fester. I care about you, but I didn't sign on to be a part of some convoluted love triangle. If you want to turn around and go back to her then go, but you need to make up your mind."

Throughout my statement Will's expression went from pained to disappointed to sheepish to completely confounded.

"What are you talking about, I need to make up my mind? My mind was never unmade. I don't want to get back together with Tessa."

I hadn't realized until that moment how much I was hoping for that answer. A month ago I was telling his to see other people and encouraging him not to commit, I've been telling myself not to get attached on a daily basis. Somewhere along the line I must've stopped listening.

"Well if you're not still in love with her then what the hell is going on with you?" I was so confused about what had happened back there.

And screw Tessa's suggestion of patience. I needed answers. Now.

Will laughed harshly.

"You can't still be in love with someone you never loved in the first place." He closed his eyes. "I don't even know where to begin. What did she tell you?"

"How about you just start from the beginning and I'll chime in where necessary."

"Here, on a cold sidewalk in the middle of the night? Can we at least go to your apartment and talk about it there?"

"No." I took his hand and walked to the park bench at the edge of the sidewalk that was a few feet in front of us and took a seat, motioning for him to do the same.

He sighed irritated, but sat down.

"Go on." I encouraged, wrapping my arms around myself to keep warm.

"Fine. Tess and I met when I was about eighteen; she was a friend of a friend and we got along great, mostly because we were, are, so alike. We were both dating people on and off and never really single at the same time, but all of our friends, hell even her parents and my aunt and uncle, kept saying how perfect we were for each other and how we should be dating. So after a couple of years when we were finally both available we decided to give it a shot. And it ended up being a horrible, horrible mistake."

He sounded like he was going to end there, so I encouraged him to go on.

"Why?"

"It just ruined everything. And it was so stupid to even try. We knew what each other were like in relationships. I'd seen her be jealous and controlling and at the same time be withdrawn and closed off and she'd seen me be the exact same way. But we tried anyway. And at first it went alright, mostly because we both lied a lot. I tried to hide all of those qualities that I knew would drive her crazy and so did she. After a few months though she finally started acting like herself again and seemed to be genuinely happy with me and it killed me that I didn't feel the same way so I kept lying." He stared up at the sky and rubbed his hands together for warmth.

"And then a year went by and her parents and my aunt and uncle had started having dinners together and we'd all done Christmas and everyone kept saying how beautiful our children would be and I just couldn't bring myself to end it and disappoint everyone, so I didn't. And I know I was horrible to her. There would be days that I ignored her calls and texts because I was too sick of myself to lie anymore; I'd pick up extra shifts at work just so I didn't have to see her. I even got Magnus to get her the job at his store so that she'd be busier and have less time for me." He looked absolutely disgusted at the memory; at himself.

"And he helped you with this?"

"Begrudgingly. He kept telling me to be honest with her and end it, but he doesn't understand the power of parental pressure. Or familial pressure, rather, in my case. I got really depressed the last six months of our relationship and she took it really hard. So did Magnus, which is why he was so freaked out by what happened between us; He didn't want me getting back to that place."

Will was silent for a moment and I remembered how defensive Magnus was at the restaurant and the things he'd said about Will going through some rough times.

"What happened then?" I encouraged, resting my hand on his leg.

I wasn't angry anymore now that it was obvious he hadn't been thinking about getting back together with her, and I felt really sorry for both of them that they had to go through an experience like that.

"Eventually I couldn't deal with the lies anymore and the morning after being forced into a dinner with her parents during which wedding colors were discussed, I packed up all of my things that had found their way to her apartment, left her a note explaining everything as best I could, and left. That was April and tonight was probably the most we've spoken since."

He covered his face with his hands.

"And that's why I haven't brought it up. Because I was selfish and horrible and don't deserve and second chance at finding love. I don't deserve you."

I pulled his hands away from his face and hugged him, not know what else to say or do. So much had changed in a month; I still knew that it would be better for him to find someone else, but now it was getting more difficult to want to make him. He made me selfish and I didn't want to stop. I wanted to be there for him, to make everything alright.

He held me tightly, as if he thought he wouldn't get the chance again if he let go, and I searched my brain for something to say to make him feel better.

"I think you hate yourself for this more than she does." I told him honestly.

"That's impossible."

"She wants you to be happy. I don't know what you told her you ended it, but she acts like she blames herself and- as your boyfriend I'm not too thrilled to say this- but as someone who cares about you I'm telling you, she does too. You need to talk to her." He sucked in a sharp breath. "Not tonight; you've been drinking and are emotional and I really don't want to walk back against the wind, but soon. You need to clear the air."

He pulled back enough so that he could see my face, but still held on to me tightly.

"I talked to you, isn't that enough?" He asked with a questioning smile.

"No." I didn't see things boding well for our future if he didn't move passed this soon.

He huffed.

"Fine. I promise I will get this straightened out soon."

"Before Thanksgiving."

"Really that early? I was thinking more along the lines of St. Patrick's Day..."

I pinched his arm until he agreed that yes, it would be settled before Thanksgiving.

"Has anyone ever told you, you should go into counselling?" He asked, rubbing his sore arm.

"All the time. Earlier this week in fact."

"I don't mean because you're a good listener. I just think you're sadistic enough to enjoy torturing your patients with shock therapy."

I pinched him again which led to a very immature five minutes involving a lot of tickling. Eventually we called truce.

"Listen," He said once we'd calmed down, "if you don't want me to come over tonight, I'd understand."

"Stop talking nonsense."

"I'm serious James."

"If I didn't want you to come home with me I wouldn't have spent the last god knows how long on this bench quite literally freezing my ass of. If you don't want to though you can let me know." I said more seriously. "I'm fairly certain we'll never have to deal with overly eager family members and talk of how beautiful our children would be, but still, I don't want you to ever feel like you have to stay with me for any reason. If you're not happy I don't want you to pretend for me."

"First off, I couldn't pretend if I tried because I'm almost one hundred percent certain you're telepathic-Christmas shopping is going to be difficult this year..." he joked, getting back to his usual self. "And second of all, when are you going to stop trying to make me break up with you? Seriously, it's getting old."

"When you finally come to your senses and realize I'm not worth your time."

"So never then?"

For the second time tonight I thought about how strange it was that a month ago that statement would have made me groan and I would have fought it; now it was what I was hoping to hear. I still thought Will was making a horrible mistake choosing to waste his time with me, but that was his choice and I was more than happy to reap the benefits of it. Now that I had him I couldn't imagine how awful it would be without him, and I didn't want to find out any time soon.

The wind picked up and sent a chill down my spine.

"I really wish you would have let me grab our jackets. I'm freezing."

"Come here." Will pulled me closer to him and wrapped his arms around me. "I'm truly sorry about tonight, I should have talked to you about all of this stuff ages ago; I should have talked to Tess about it ages ago, for that matter."

"Everyone has skeletons. Besides, it's not as if I've ever asked."

"I just didn't want you to think badly of me. I mean, you've only ever know the perfect, lifesaving, amazing lover William Herondale, I didn't want to introduce you to the lying jerk who breaks up with someone through a note version." He said laughing a little. There was my snarky Will back.

"I'm sorry, when did I meet that first one and where did he go?" I joked, earning a nip on my neck. "I don't need you to be perfect, I just need you to be you. I need you to be honest. That's all I ask."

I leaned up and met his lips with me, melting into the contact, which heated up quickly.

"You have no idea how much I care about you." Will whispered against my hair once he'd pulled away for air.

"More than is wise. But then, who I am to talk?" I added, more to myself than to him. I'm not even sure he heard me, he was whispering something in welsh. I assumed it was welsh; that or gibberish, they sounded very similar sometimes. I didn't recognize any of the words, but I could guess the general sentiment by the way his voice sounded and his hands held me.

"Everything I want to say to you in English right now is ridiculously clichéd or cheesy or woefully inadequate." He murmured before switching back to welsh.

I smiled, closing my eyes and concentrating only on him and the moment, for once taking my own advice and letting whatever was happening happen.

"Wǒ ài nǐ." I heard the words before I registered that they had come from my mouth. I went rigid with shock at my admission.

When had all of this happened? When had my feelings deepened so dramatically? I would have thought I might have known how I felt before I admitted it to him, but apparently not. For a moment I considered blaming it on the high emotions of the evening and Alec putting ideas of love in my head, but there was no point in lying to myself.

"James what's wrong?" Will, who obviously had no idea what I'd just said, must have noticed my change in demeanor because he stopped kissing my neck and looked at me, concerned.

We sat like that for a moment, staring into each other's eyes without speaking until that little skeptical, guarded part of my mind that had been growing smaller by the day completely vanished.

"Nothing, everything's perfect." I pulled him back to me, kissing him with more emotion than I knew I had, and was pleasantly surprised when it was equally matched. His arms held me tightly against his body and my fingers knit in his soft hair, holding his mouth against mine in urgency.

We might've stayed like that all night had we not been interrupted by a lot of lewd remarks from what appeared to be a group of drunk freshmen headed home.

We were both startled out of our romantic state and decided that it was probably best if we continued our journey back to my apartment.

"What?" I asked after catching Will staring at me for the fifth time with a giant smile plastered on his face.

"Nothing." He shrugged, but didn't cut it out.

"Will you're being weird."

"Looking at my boyfriend is weird?" He countered.

"Staring without reason is, yes."

"It's not without reason. I like looking at you. Especially in the moonlight."

I rolled my eyes, but smiled despite myself.

"You should live closer." He grumbled, wrapping his arm around my waist.

"Sick of walking already?" It'd only been a couple of minutes.

"No, sick of not having you in my arms."

"Well technically I'm in one of your arms..." I mused.

"You know what I meant." The fingers that were stroking my hip bone made sure I knew exactly what he meant.

"You really need to work on this patience thing." I chastised, teasingly running my hand over his chest.

"Or maybe you should work on being less enticing."

"Me enticing, I think you're mistaken." I untucked the side of his shirt and warmed my freezing hand on his hot body.

"You're trying to kill me." He said, pulling my hand away and walking faster to put distance between him and my teasing hands.

I behaved for a few minutes, long enough to earn my hand holding privileges back, then started testing to waters.

"I'm cold." I moped, nudging my shoulder against his.

"That sucks."

"Wiiiiillllll. It's your fault, the least you can do is put your arm around me." I whined. The guilt trip worked. Will let go of my hand and put his arm around my shoulders, rubbing his hand up and down my arm.

I put my arm around his back and snuggled against him, resting my head against his shoulder. After a minute or two of this I upped the ante, letting my free hand find its way up his shirt again, my fingertips tracing the outlines of his muscles.

His breath hitched.

I leaned up and kissed his jaw down to his neck (not an easy task while walking, but I managed it well enough), and felt his swallow hard.

"You're a horrible person." He told me, unwrapping his arm from my shoulders.

"Hey, I thought you were going to warm me up." I whispered in his ear before grazing my teeth across his earlobe (an act that I know he finds irresistible).

I looked ahead and noticed we were nearly home, so I let my hand slide down the front of his pants on its way to his deep front pocket.

"If you don't stop I will be forced to throw you against the next wall we walk past and take you until you scream my name." Will growled, grabbing my wrist and pulling it away.

…I really shouldn't have found that as erotic as I did…

"You're bluffing." I scoffed, heart racing just the idea of it. There was no way Will would make good on that threat though.

"Test me at your own risk." He warned, letting go of me and smiling. I wasn't sure if he could tell what those ideas were doing to me, but his expression had most certainly changed; his eyes were darkened with lust and challenge and his smile was hungry, but he did nothing more than continue walking forward.

We walked in silence until we reached my building, I was still too caught up thinking to start any kind of a decent conversation. .

Will opened the door for me and I decided to take him up on his warning, just in case...

"Such a gentleman." I whispered close to his ear once he'd walked through as well. I ran my hands over his chest and nibbled his earlobe. I felt him sigh and his arm reach out for something, then I heard the click of a door handle.

He pushed me away and looked me in the eye sternly.

"I warned you."

The sound, I soon discovered, was of the door to the storage closet on the wall next to us opening, apparently left unlocked by a careless maintenance worker.

I was unceremoniously pushed into it, followed by Will who clicked the light on before closing the door and locking it.

He pushed me against the door roughly, threading his fingers in my hair, yanking hard, forcing my lips to his.

Will's mouth was hot and eager, his tongue explored without its usual careful and calculated movements and his teeth grazed my bottom lip more harshly than normal, making me moan loudly into our kiss.

After a moment he pulled away, breathing heavily. His sapphire eyes searched my own as he spoke.

"You still have a chance to repent. Admit you were wrong, apologize, and we can go upstairs to your soft mattress. No more punishment." He was asking permission to continue, giving me a chance to call it off and end this now.

It was sweet and appreciated, but I didn't want to stop.

"I'm not apologizing, and I still don't believe you'll do it." I goaded, moaning in pleasure when his fingers tightened around my hair again.

"So be it."

This night is just full of surprises. I thought as his teeth sunk into my neck. The hand that wasn't tangled in my hair moved to my belt, quickly undoing it along with the button of my trousers.

His fingers felt like ice wrapping around me, but they quickly warmed up. There was none of his usual gentle teasing and playful touches; this was urgent and passionate and it felt like pure bliss.

His position against my leg let me know just how extraordinarily hard he was getting from this and reached down, dying to touch him.

His hand left my hair and grabbed my wrist, slamming it with controlled pressure against the door next to my head.

"When I want you to touch me I'll make you, understand?" The tone of his voice was nearly enough to make me cum by itself.

Fuck he was so perfect.

I nodded my head, not trusting myself to speak, and he let go of my hand, all the while still stroking me with the perfect mixture of delicacy and roughness.

He waited until he had me gasping, on the edge of release, before taking his hand away and pushing me to my knees. I wanted to complain about him not finishing the job, but my mouth was quickly employed otherwise.

Will's fingers found my scalp again and he guided my mouth to the speed and angle he wanted, watching me intently the entire time. I brought my hands to his waist for better control and moaned around him while he slide in and out of my mouth. I loved the way he tasted, the way he felt against my tongue… I ached to be touching my own throbbing erection, too turned on by what was happening.

Will tugged at my hair, forcing me to stop and pulling me to my feet. He kissed me passionately while forcing my boxers down, then turned me around and carefully pressed me up against the door.

"By the angels you are beautiful," he spoke against my ear. He had his hand around my throat in a way that only applied pressure if I leaned forward a little, giving me control while still feeling like I was being controlled. My back was flush against his chest and I could feel his warmth in spite of the fact that we still had our shirts on.

The fingers of his other hand dipped into my mouth one by one. I sucked on them, swirling my tongue around them in a way that had Will stifling his moans against my shoulder. Once thoroughly slicked, the fingers moved lower, pressing against my entrance while Will's mouth licked and bit at the back of my sensitive neck.

I would no doubt be covered in bruised tomorrow.

I pressed against the hand at my neck while his finger, now fingers, worked me, picking up speed while somehow still remaining to feel careful.

"Please Will," I begged, needing to feel more of him inside me.

"Please what?" He whispered calmly in my ear while his fingers relentlessly tortured me.

"Ple..Please fuck me." I couldn't take much more of this.

His chuckle was pure delight as his fingers withdrew and the hand that was around my throat moved to cover my mouth.

My body was shocked into crying out with the pain that rippled through me when he entered, not taking his time like usual. At least he was somewhat slick from my saliva and precum though and I had no time to dwell on that pain, because he immediately started moving with slow, deep thrusts and the initial discomfort quickly turned into blinding pleasure.

His hand moved from my mouth down to my hip, holding me steady as his pace picked up. His mouth licked and bit at my flesh in between moaning my name and various Welsh curse words.

I bit my lip in an attempt to keep quiet, but it was useless. He felt too good.

Will's movements were losing their fluidity, his thrusts forceful and demanding. We were both moaning loudly now and if I had had the ability to think about anything else I surely would have been worried someone would hear. As it was, all my mind could focus on was how unbelievably amazing he felt and how much I wanted to feel him cum.

I told him that last part after one of the hands leaving finger shaped bruises on my hips dipped down between my legs and began pumping in unison with him thrusts, driving me crazy.

The words had barely left my mouth when I felt his release and let myself get lost in the blinding ecstasy.

Will's POV:

Walking upstairs my mind finally started to come back into reality, immediately replaying and analyzing the events of the evening. My first thoughts were to whether I had been too rough with Jem; I honestly couldn't say how hard I had bit or grabbed or done anything for that matter, my mind had been too caught up in the complete bliss of it all. He hadn't complained though, so that was a promising sign.

And there was no doubt in my mind as to whether he'd enjoyed it.

I wouldn't have expected him to be into anything rougher than our usual sex, but he'd proven me wrong when I'd accidently bitten him harder than I'd intended to when he first came over.

God was that only earlier tonight?

It felt like a lifetime ago, so much had happened since.

I'd told Jem about my parents, and he'd accepted it.

I'd told Jem about Tess, and he'd accepted it.

I'd told Jem I loved him, and he hadn't understood a word of it because I'd been rambling in Welsh and it had just sort of popped out.

But I meant it.

This was what I processed while we took a hot shower, while we got ready for bed. It was what was consuming my thoughts when we climbed into bed and Jem turned to face me, reaching out and putting his arm around my waist. I moved closer and put my arm around him, holding him tightly to me.

We lay like this in silence for a long time, long enough that I thought he'd fallen asleep.

"I love you James Carstairs." I breathed, barely over a whisper, not wanting it to wake up. I'd been positive he was asleep, but I immediately felt his lips move against my skin and his hot breath as he replied.

"I love you too."