A/N: Thanks for all the wonderful reviews, they completely make my day. I really appreciate every single one :)

Thirty-Eight

Puck thought it was necessary to break while two guys crossed the road up ahead. Technically, he could've run them down. The light was yellow—jaywalking was a total crime—and he only had to slow down to follow the rules.

Still, murder was murder and not very badass unless he was a contracted ninja assassin. He'd totally have a samurai sword, Puck thought as he pushed on the break. No, nun-chucks. They were way more wicked because—

"Noah if you don't speed up, I'll skin you alive and castrate the rest," Rachel screeched from beside him, huffing and those evil eyes were back and glaring at him.

He swallowed. "Babe, the light's red now. Just calm down, okay?"

The loud gasping sound she was making was kind of scary and he was sort of worried she couldn't breath until she started hitting him.

Fuck.

"Don't you dare tell me to calm down, Noah Puckerman!" More hitting, he stepped on the gas when the light changed and thank God she fell back into her seat with a glare. "If you hadn't arrived late to pick me up this morning, we wouldn't be running late. Such a thing directly correlates with the speed in which you'd be expected to go, so this is entirely your fault."

That was kind of true.

Puck slept through the alarm he set on his phone. Stupid Schumacher was making them leave at like the crack of dawn. Apparently, his broke ass could only afford the matinee.

"Babe…" Puck started but a quick scary glare changed his mind, "Rach, I'll get us there I promise. Besides weren't you all against this whole thing anyway?"

Rachel scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest and totally pushing her boobs up, through in that animal sweater he couldn't really see much. "Of course, I am. The entire idea of viewing our competition, especially in regards to Vocal Adrenaline, is simply preposterous."

"Sure, Berry, whatever you say," he yawned—the coffee Rachel brought with breakfast wasn't helping his tiredness at all—before cutting his eyes back to her, his eyebrows jumping up and down. "It can't be that bad."

Rachel rolled her eyes, as expected. "Please, Noah, you're thrilled by anything that gives you a legitimate excuse to be absent from class for a day."

Well yeah. His new robo-mom made it impossible to ditch. Not that he really had anything to do. His two favourite things (sleeping and sex) had gone to shit lately and he could eat in class so there went the third. His life was just sucking all around actually, except for maybe Quinn and his kid. Apologizing actually felt good or whatever. She kind of freaked out but Quinn was confusing most of the time.

"Yeah," he nodded, his eyes casting over to hers with a wink, "my mom even thought I was lying when I gave her Schue's stupid slip to sign yesterday."

Again with the eye rolling, Puck was starting to think that she spent way too much time with Santana doing whatever they did. Santana was drunk all the time, so it was probably crying.

"Yes, I'm aware," she sighed before immediately straightening up when they pulled into the school parking lot with two minutes to spare—fuckin' ace! "She contacted me to question its validity."

He turned off his truck and Rachel flew out the doors, running to the retard kid bus Schue probably stole from the blind.

"Damn, a short bus," he grumbled and reluctantly followed after.

Puck briefly wondered if Hudson would even fit, then he saw him slobbering all over his Jewbro feet away. Sam and Mike were looking at him with weird looks on their faces, which meant he was probably being a jackass again.

"Noah," Rachel yelled suddenly before lunging for his hand to pull him to her quicker. "Could you please inform Finn that I am in fact not exaggerating when I say that you need me by your side at all times during the commission of long trips to assist in soothing your motion sickness?"

Oh so maybe Berry was being the jackass.

Still, he owed her.

Sighing, Puck grabbed his stomach and started nodding. "Oh yeah, dude. I totally blow chunks without her."

Berry turned around—her lips mouthing thank you—before dragging him to the very back of the bus. Puck guessed she didn't want Finn sitting behind her either. Mike and Sam quickly fell into the seats in front of them so Rachel was in the corner near the window by the time Finn came stumbling in. He glared and then sat next to Artie in the front.

Smiling, Rachel said, "I appreciate you marring your nefarious reputation for me."

"My pleasure, babe," he winked, smirking when she finally shifted to look up at him. "You can't avoid him forever, you know?"

She almost looked like she was pouting; it was kind of cute with her creepy sweater with some kind of dog on the front. Well, maybe, Puck wasn't too sure.

Rachel sighed. "I'm quite aware. I'm just hoping that in time he'll move on to another conquest for his urge for a rebound before he does something that deems our would-be friendship irreparable."

"Yeah, wouldn't hold my breath, babe," Puck laughed.

Rachel was glaring at him when Schue came in. He was talking but nobody was really paying attention, except for maybe his Jewbro.

Puck put his headphones in, Detroit Rock City blaring through them and finally fully drowning out Schuemaker's girly cries. Yeah, he should just really keep calling him Schue for short—totally easier.

He must've fell asleep because Rage Against the Machine definitely weren't Kiss and the bus was moving. Rachel was shaking his arm and he paused it just in time to catch, "Noah, we need to talk. I've been thinking a lot since your sudden release from incarceration and I feel like perhaps we need some space."

Puck wiped his face with his hands; he was still totally drained but that shiny look to her eyes made him think this was important. Sure, he was confused but for only a moment.

Smirking, his eyebrows went up and down. "If you want some time to put the moves on Quinn all you had to do was ask."

"Noah!" Rachel gasped, glancing frantically around and only calming down when she realized everyone around them was out cold. Still, he readied himself for a rant anyway and he was not disappointed. "Noah, that was highly inappropriate and a completely unfounded accusation. Don't you think Quinn has enough to deal with? Announcing such a thing near two of the biggest gossip hounds in the school is highly dangerous so—"

"So you actually got some, huh?" he said it lower this time.

He wasn't a complete asshole.

Still, it wasn't enough for his Jewbro—he should've expected.

"It's none of your business quite frankly and we are not conversing about it here any longer, Noah Puckerman," she stabbed his chest—like tiny tiny needles—and then after a few dozen pokes her hand fell back on her thigh. "My belief that we need time apart isn't because of Quinn, Noah."

Now Puck was confused and he really didn't like this idea. They were fine the way things were. She nagged him to do stuff and he pissed her off. Why the hell would she want to change that?

She looked serious though. Her eyes were nice and dark—not crazy and black—and her face was scrunched up like it always was when she was thinking.

Sighing, he said, "Why, babe? Everything seems fine to me."

"Admittedly, we could survive with things continuing as they are but I feel like we both deserve more than that," Rachel was looking at him to check if what she said made any sense—which it didn't—and then she sighed, "I feel as if my actions are enabling you, Noah. You do reckless things all the time and never feel the brunt of the consequences for them. The majority of the time, I do and that's quite alright but I believe that the entire situation these past couple of months could've been avoided if you had experienced them."

Puck didn't understand. He owned up to his mistakes or whatever by apologizing and his mom left him to rot in jail because of that damn party for the cash for Quinn. That wasn't enough?

He shook his head. "I still don't get what this has to do with me being friends with you."

"We'll always be friends, Noah," she said softly, reaching out to grip his arm before her hand fell away. "I'll still attend your football games and we can recommence bro's nights if you so choose. I suppose I just require some time for myself to determine who I am beyond your best friend."

Puck wasn't too sure what she was telling him still but he knew she needed him to let her do it. He wanted to say this was a chick thing—like he did with most of the stuff Rachel did that confused him—but it seemed pretty serious, not like the other chick stuff before. Still, he found himself nodding and a relieved smile appeared on her face.

"Sure, babe," he nodded, knowing if he didn't fake it she might do something crazy like cut him forever. "I get it."

Rachel was hugging him seconds later, looking up at him with bright eyes. "I was confident you would, Noah. You don't know how much this means to me."

She was right, Puck didn't but he was going to give it to her anyway. "Yeah, no problem, jewbabe."

"Oh," she quickly pulled back and out of his arms with a jolt, "I entirely forgot to remind you about the doctor's appointment. It's at four and I'm so excited to witness the determination of gender because I was reading…"

Gender?

Sure, Rachel told him Quinn wanted him to go but his kid was getting a gender?

It just happened, just like that?

Puck looked over at Rachel to see if he could still catch anything about what she read but she was already giggling softly as she typed something into her phone.

Puck suddenly felt sick.

Ironic.

Berry's obsession with that hot chick Alanis taught him all about that.