Birthday
I had to submit SOMETHING for the imaginary occasion.

Needless to say Squilliam was a little bit pissed.

He shouldn't have been, for it was December 19th, his 40th birthday (we are still set in 2016 here, for those still reading this). And birthdays are supposed to be happy occasions, right?
It wasn't as if Squill was stressed over turning 40 and all the stereotypes it entails such as suddenly becoming unattractive to his husband, goodness no.
And goodness no it wasn't that said husband wasn't going to give him a good round of birthday sex late that night; oh no, that was guaranteed.

It was just that Squidward and Victoria weren't even pretending to pretend that they'd forgotten his birthday and were planning a surprise party/cliché for later.

The conversation that morning had gone as follows:
"Mornin', Squiddy. Morning, Vicky."
"Hi, Squilli-dad. Look, we're making things."
"I can see that, honey. You know, today's a very special day for Daddy."
"I know, Daddy, it's—Ow."
"What special day, Squill? What are you talking about?"
"Only the one you haven't forgotten for the past few years."
"No, I have absolutely no idea that it is your birthday. Right, Vicky?"
"But Squiddy-Dad, we're making him pres---OW."
"Nope, no idea what you're talking about. We just happen to be down here making arts and crafts, is all. Nothing exciting here."

"…Are you two even trying anymore?" hissed the birthday 'man' before turning on his heel and storming out of the room.

So yeah, he was pretty angry at them for not, in his mind, even bothering to stick to the cliché.
However, there was one possibility that he hadn't counted on – and hadn't expected to.

A few hours later, this was proven the hard way. He entered the living room expecting a bunch of his friends to jump out at him yelling "Surprise" only to find his lover there looking dressed to go out.

"What the hell is this?" he demanded - nay, screamed. "Where's the surprise guests, the flashbacks, the gilded doorknobs?"

But there was a logical explanation: Squidward and Victoria's shoddy attempt at pretending to forget was actually an attempt to persuade him into thinking they'd remembered. In reality, the two of them really HAD forgotten that it was his birthday.
"I didn't want you to get upset," Squidward explained, "so we pretended that we were going to get you a surprise party to throw you off the scent, and knocked up a last minute reservation to that Fancy restaurant. Hope you don't mind."

The stilted apologies from the previously high-and-mighty cephalopod were rather awkward.
As always, though, the scenario ended on the lighter side: Squidward managed to point out that he needed 'punishment' that night – for the first time since forever.

The joys of roleplay when you're 40.