Chapter 34

No Longer Protected

The trip back to Moonlake Cottage for me was much more protected than it usually was. Moody had decided to come along for the ride and Tonks, as I had assumed, came with us. Now I knew what it was like to be watched. Either way, I was glad to be home. I hadn't been back to Moonlake Cottage for nearly a year. It looked the same as ever. The same welcoming smells, the same comfy furniture, the same sounds of the clock in the hallway. When the room came into view I saw Mad-Eye and Tonks standing in the sitting room. Lupin stepped out behind me a few moments later.

'You better go and unpack, Jen,' he said to me. He brushed down his robes and motioned the other two Order members into the kitchen. 'I'll call you when dinner's ready.'

The three older wizards walked out of the room. I knew what that was going to be about. Protection Spells and Harry and Merlin knows what else.

I bent down and let Gizmo out of his cage. He hooted happily at me then flew off and settled on his perch. Next I took his cage and my trunk and dragged them upstairs. My room was exactly the same when I left it. My bed was unmade; my books were scattered over my room and bookshelf; a few pairs of shoes dotted here and there; and my jewellery box was open. I don't remember opening it before I left.

Curious I went over to it. There lying on the side was my pendant. The sickle moon one Harry had given me. It was broken. The clip had been broken from the chain. I remember now. I broke it because I was angry with Harry. And I still couldn't do magic outside school for another month so I couldn't fix it. I touched my mother's necklace in guilt also feeling another beneath my hand. I pulled the chain out from under my shirt. It was the Black locket.

I stared it, remembering back to the day I stole it. Low thing for me but I had to get it. It was rightfully mine. I had a feeling one of the other Black members would eventually try and get it so I made a copy in case they tried to get it. I placed the identical copy lying about on the chest of drawers, not caring if it was found. The one bit of magic I did do outside school. I was just lucky I left there before the Ministry could send a letter through the Trace I had on me.

The Trace. In some ways it sort of felt like an invasion of privacy, being tracked by the Ministry through every bit of magic I did. In other ways, it was good because it upheld the Statute of Secrecy. Then again the Ministry is so cocked up at the moment what did it matter? The Muggles would soon know about us because of Voldemort and his hatred for them. Still, only one month left of it. Anyway, back to the necklace.

'I'll get Lupin to fix it later,' I said, putting it in my pocket. I looked round my room. 'But first,' I bent down and picked up a broken photo frame; I'd broken it last year, 'I better clean up and unpack or Lupin will murder me.'

After making my bed I put all my robes in the laundry basket for washing. Next I put all my textbooks on my bookshelf, picking up any other random books I'd left lying about and putting them back in their rightful places. Yeah, even though I'm a witch I don't get out of doing chores. The magic just helps it along a bit. Once I'd put my things away I took off the Black locket, a weighty feeling lifting off me, and picked up the broken picture frame with the necklace to take to Lupin to fix.

I came downstairs, looking for Lupin. I could hear voices in the kitchen. Quietly I approached the door to listen though I knew the moment Moody's eye saw me I'd be discovered. There were more people in there now. It sounded like Kingsley and Dedalus were here.

'… need to get Potter from Privet Drive safely,' I heard Kingsley say. 'The protection he's got vanishes the moment he turns seventeen.'

'But if we move him any day beforehand it could jeopardise it,' responded Tonks.

'And Black? Her protection's running out as well.'

What? What protection? This was news to me. What protection was I under?

'I know,' replied Lupin's voice. 'Tala … she never had this problem with her magic. But Jenna's developed a lot quicker than I anticipated and along with the spell Tala put on her as a baby, it means she might find it harder to control.'

'Does she even know what happened?' asked Tonks.

OK, now I was really freaked. What were they talking about?

'I suggest we pause for a moment as this conversation is no longer private.'

Through the perspex glass I saw Moody motion with his wand. I made a dash to go back upstairs but the door swung open and I was pulled inside. I glanced over my shoulder to see everyone looking at me, an unimpressed look on Lupin's tired face.

'Er … anyone thirsty?' I asked hesitantly.

'Surely by now I've taught you not to listen into other people's conversations,' said Lupin.

I turned and stood straight, facing them. I looked at each of them in turn.

'Well, when either my friends or myself are the subject of discussion,' I said carefully, 'I'd rather know what's going on after what happened the last time information was withheld.'

'This is not open for discussion,' growled Moody. 'Not now, at any rate.' He got up and took his walking cane. He strode past me to the door. 'We'll continue this when there aren't eavesdropping witches about.'

Kingsley and Dedalus also got up. They walked through the door from the dining room into the sitting room. A moment later I heard the familiar sounds of the emerald flames as they disappeared into them and Flooed away. Glancing back, I saw Tonks and Lupin share a look that plainly told me something was up.

'So what's this protection that's on me?' I asked. I could hear slight quaver in my voice. In truth I was scared at what I was going hear. More things about myself I didn't know? 'And what spell did Mum put on me.'

'Now is not the time,' said Lupin point blank. He turned away and flicked his wand at the larder. Some food and a pot came floating out and landed on the sideboard. 'It's soup for dinner. Dora, can you start peeling these vegetables?'

'Stop doing this!' I shouted all of a sudden. Lupin and Tonks both stopped, looking back at me. 'Tell me what's going on!' I demanded. 'What the hell is wrong with me? And don't give me that look, Lupin,' I added when Lupin put on the face he used when he was telling me off. 'Do you think I haven't worked out by now that something's wrong with me? That something's not the same as other witches?'

'Jenna, there is nothing wrong with you,' said Lupin firmly.

'Then what are you hiding from me?'

I stared between the two adults, daring them to try and stop me. I didn't care what the current situation between us was; I had to know what Lupin was hiding from me.

'I have dreams, terrifying dreams predicting people's deaths which I've been taken into. I've done magic without my wand I never meant to do. I can't transform any more, but then I go disappear into fire like a phoenix can at a mere whim. It's like I've lost a part of me. And if you know what it is, Lupin, then please, tell me.'

I watched Lupin carefully, trying to find any clue in his eyes as to what was wrong with me. He just looked back, his brown eyes fixed upon me, before he sighed and slumped down on to a stool. He ran his hand through his hair in exasperation.

'I was hoping it would never come to this,' he said quietly. 'That I'd never have to tell you.'

'Tell me what?' I asked desperately.

'Remus?' said Tonks gently. She placed a hand on his. He gripped it. I was becoming increasingly scared of what was going to be said. I could feel my body shake as I stood there waiting for an answer.

'Best start with the simple stuff,' he said eventually.

Lupin sat straight staring right at me.

'The dreams, the magic without your wand, the transforming. These are just magic that has been passed on to you from your mother. Tala used to have premonitions and children sometimes inherit magical qualities. Harry, for example, inherited James's talent on a broom. As for magic without your wand, that just means your magic is getting stronger and so you'll be able to use it without the need of a wand to direct it. Wandless magic, however, takes a lot more self control.

'Now as for the spell Tala put on you.' Here, Lupin's voice became more hesitant. 'That's a complicated story in itself, not all of which I can explain because I don't know all the details.

'Years ago …' began Lupin in a mutter like it was hurting him to recount it, 'Tala almost lost her life.'

'I know, Lestrange raped her,' I said but Lupin cut me off.

'No, this was different.' Lupin shuddered. It seemed to be tearing him up. 'It was on a mission for the Order and Tala was cornered by Bellatrix.' My heart skipped a beat. 'She was merciless, using every curse and hex Voldemort had taught her. In her view Tala wasn't worthy to be with a Black, even if he was blood traitor like Sirius was considered. Tala was left bleeding to death, slashed over her stomach by a terrible curse.' He sighed hiding his face in his hands. 'Only I knew and I wasn't there to help …'

'Knew what?' I asked though I was afraid to.

'That she was pregnant.'

I stifled a gasp, my body convulsing as Lupin said it. My legs suddenly turned to jelly. Tonks caught me as I started to fall over and helped me into a seat. I found it hard to breathe. My throat felt constricted as I tried to take in this information. It felt like someone had just dropped a weight in my stomach as I learnt this. I'd come so close to dying … before I was even born.

'She survived,' said Lupin. He must have seen my reaction because a moment later he was kneeling in front of me, his hand holding my face. 'She survived to marry and have you. If she hadn't you wouldn't be here.'

'Bellatrix is vicious though,' I said shakily. 'How could I have survived?'

'Because of Fawkes.'

'Fawkes? Professor Dumbledore's phoenix?' Lupin nodded.

'Dumbledore was with Sirius when they found her,' he explained. 'She'd lost too much blood for them to move her to St Mungo's so Dumbledore called Fawkes to him. The phoenix healed her, the tears closing the wound on Tala's stomach. They got her to St Mungo's straight after so she could have a Blood Replenishing potion.'

'Did anyone check to see if I was all right?'

'Sirius didn't know about you, Tala had refused to tell him. When I got to the hospital I instantly spoke to the Healer and told her Tala was pregnant. They did some tests and confirmed you were all right. Sirius was none the wiser.

'When you were born you were perfectly healthy.' Lupin took the seat in front of me. He held my hands in his and gripped them tightly. 'But Tala wasn't sure everything was all right because of what happened. Sirius told me before she died they'd had an argument about your safety. Tala tried and, much against Sirius's opinion, placed a Binding Spell on you to seal some of your magic until you were older.' Lupin turned over my right arm. On it lay four scars in the shape of two crosses. 'The Three Strikes.'

I stared at my arm as I took all this in. Lupin knew about them? But what were they? To my knowledge those crosses stood for Mum and Dad and James and Lily. People who I loved or loved me. These were from a spell?

'What does this spell do besides bind my magic?' I asked. 'What are its effects and why did I need it?'

'I don't know,' said Lupin heavily. 'Tala was sure that you were in danger and bound your magic until you were old enough to handle it. Then, I assume, she'd lift it but she never …' Lupin didn't finish the sentence. 'The spell itself,' he continued, 'I've researched it and it's very complicated. Tonks knows more about it though than I do.'

I looked behind me. My breathing still felt slightly constricted. I hadn't noticed Tonks' hand on my shoulder and the other stroking my hair. I didn't brush her away. Instead I watched her as I waited for an answer.

'The Three Strikes spell is only used when a person's magic can be a danger to them,' said Tonks. That didn't make me feel any better. 'It's dangerous itself because of the complications it can lead to so it's rarely used. It's a brutal spell.

'The person under the spell has three chances. Well, they get three strikes, hence the name. Unless the spell is removed first, the person can only lose three people they care about or care about them before their magic breaks free.'

'But I've lost four people who loved me or I loved,' I said quietly. 'James and Lily and ...' I bit my lip, 'Mum and Dad.'

'If it is a pair of people, parents for example, the strike is split in half, giving the person under the spell longer.'

'But why James and Lily?'

Lupin answered that one.

'You and Harry have a deep history with each other,' he told me. 'Sirius and Tala were his godparents while James and Lily were yours. When Tala died, Lily regularly babysat you when Sirius and James were busy for the Order until they went into hiding. You were like a second child to them as Harry was to your Mum and Dad.'

Wow, Harry and I went way back. I don't even remember it. It's not like he did either.

'So what are the consequences of this spell?' I asked Tonks, glancing at her.

'The person it's cast on gets too scared to love,' she said simply, 'in fear of losing them.'

I took a moment as I thought it through. Then I just got up and left the room. I slammed the kitchen door behind me, ignoring Lupin and Tonks calling my name, and went upstairs to my bedroom. I closed the door behind me and fell against it. I gasped and covered my mouth with my hand to try and stop myself crying. How could Mum do that to me? Bind my magic in case I became a danger because of what happened! What could possibly happen from being healed by Fawkes?

A while later, I didn't know how long it was, I heard my door open. I was lying on my bed staring at the wall thinking about what Mum did. How could she do that to me? I felt my bed depress behind me. A hand gently brushed back my hair.

'Are you all right?' I looked up. It was Tonks. She no longer had her vivid pink spiky hair but long brown waves. She was also slightly thinner but more ample in the chest department. Her punk Muggle clothes looked very odd on her now.

'You're in your natural form,' I mumbled.

'I thought it'd be easier for you to talk to me if I was un-morphed.' She stroked my hair again. I looked away. 'Jenna, I know I'm not your favourite person at the moment because of what happened between Remus and I. But I do care about you so if you want to talk, I'm right here.'

I thought for a moment then sat up.

'It's just hard to believe,' I mumbled, pulling my hair over my shoulder and fiddling with it. 'First … you and Lupin and now I'm apparently a danger to myself so Mum puts a spell on me which now really does makes me scared to love anyone in case I do lose control. I've got one strike left and –'

'Jen, listen to me,' said Tonks kindly. She brushed back my hair, running her hand over my cheek. 'You are a strong witch. I've never seen anyone be able to deal with the things you've been through. Even if the spell does break I know in my heart you will be able to control whatever power Tala bound. She had her reasons. She wanted to protect you like any mother would for her child.'

A smile started at the corners of my lips. I guess Mum just wanted to protect me. Like Lupin said, she probably would have removed the spell when she thought I was old enough. But it was the consequences that scared me most. I cared so much for everyone I knew, my friends, the Weasleys, Hermione. I'd do anything to help them if they needed it. But there were only three people I knew I couldn't lose; Tonks, Lupin and ... Harry.

'Do you really love him?' I asked moments later. I looked up at Tonks. I had to know something. 'Are you sure it's love you feel?'

Tonks smiled, a blush in her cheeks I could tell had nothing to do with her being a Metamorphmagus.

'I'm pretty sure it is,' she said. 'Every time I see Remus he makes my heart skip a beat. My pulse races, my legs turn to jelly, I get butterflies. I can't help but smile whenever I see him and I can't stop thinking about him when I don't. I've never felt like this for anyone. I'm pretty sure it's love.'

I bit my lip nervously.

'Does Lupin feel the same way?'

'I hope he does. I love your uncle and I think he feels something for me. But I can assure you, I don't want to come between you and Remus. I know you see him as a father because he's looked after you most your life and the last thing I want to do is appear as if I'm trying to replace your mother. I care about you and I wouldn't want to do anything to jeopardise our relationship.'

I looked at Tonks for a moment, then said, 'You're not replacing my Mum, Tonks. I just don't want Lupin getting hurt.'

'I know.'

We sat there for a moment before I leaned forward and hugged her. Tonks returned the hug. I held on to her tightly. It was nice knowing someone else cared about me. I may have had my doubts but I wasn't going to do anything to ruin this chance for Lupin. It had been a while to my knowledge since he'd last had someone. I just had to give Tonks a chance.

Unknown to Tonks though … she'd just told me what I'd dreaded.

Over the next week or so I tried my best to start getting along with Tonks seeing as she was at Moonlake quite often now. She and Lupin spent most of their time putting Protection Charms around the house or communicating with other members of the Order. As for me, I had more important things to do. I had just under a month before I became of age and I had to prepare myself. At the beginning of August was Bill and Fleur's wedding. After that who knew what I'd be doing with Ron, Hermione and Harry.

After convincing Lupin to place an Undetectable Extension Charm on my old school bag I returned to my room to pack. I put as many clothes into my bag first, folding them up at the bottom of the bag; after that I went to my bed and took my toy dragon and, carefully cutting into him, placed the Black locket inside him and put him inside my bag as well; after him were a few other personal things from my room including my slippers, the small amount of Felix I still had from the fight against the Death Eaters, my broom and my photo album. Next it was just a matter of taking the books from Lupin's library that would help us the most.

Creeping across the landing I headed for the banisters to see if Lupin was in the hallway. The coast was clear. I quickly went downstairs. Across from the kitchen door was another with the words "Lupin's office" written in the wood. Checking Lupin wasn't coming I quickly went inside and shut the door behind me. Knowing I had little time I searched Lupin's library for all the books I'd written down that I thought we'd need. Pulling them from the shelves I chucked them into my bag. With those gathered I hastily left the room and ran back upstairs to my room.

Once inside I closed the door and locked it so Lupin couldn't come in. I dropped my bag down on my bed and opened the lid. I reached into it and pulled out a book. Again and again I did this pulling out four more books, my arm sinking deeper into my bag each time. I think I had the right ones. Curses, Hexes and Jinxes of the Underground; Offence and Defence: Magical Strengths and Weaknesses; Practical Potions and Ingredients in the Muggle World; Dark Beasts and Darker Arts; and A Guide to Wandless Magic. I think these were the ones that would help us most. I put them back in my bag and hid them amongst my clothes. With those hidden I shoved my school books inside. Hermione would probably have thought of this as well but if she hadn't, we'd have my books. At least they're in a better state than Ron's.

'That should be enough,' I muttered to myself. I closed the lid and clipped it shut. I then picked it up and put it in my wardrobe. 'And still it's really light,' I added in surprise. Benefits of the spell I guess. Now I only had two things to sort out: my photo of Mum and Dad, and Harry's necklace.

Lupin had fixed both when I went downstairs on Saturday night for dinner. They were on the side as Tonks, now known as Dora, helped Lupin cook. I picked them up. I turned over the photo frame and pulled out the back. I then took out the photo. Mum and Dad smiled up at me and waved. Then Dad gave Mum a kiss and he winked at me, grinning. I carefully folded the photo and put it my pocket. After dinner I placed the necklace in my jewellery box and took out a second. The Key to my Heart. I clipped it round my neck and held it in front of me on its long chain. I knew the person who had already won that. I just hoped I lived long enough to give it to him.

Something quite surprising and shocking happened around the middle of July. I don't know what possessed her to do it, but then again she was always a bit out there, Dora proposed to Lupin and he accepted. They'd only been together for a few weeks. It was a small ceremony, I was a bridesmaid, but it just seemed strange. Lupin never did things this rashly. It wasn't like him. At the wedding I watched them carefully as they took their vows and as I thought, Lupin's voice was not as sure as he pretended. Now I wasn't sure at all if Lupin returned Dora's feelings. On the plus side though I met my cousin Andromeda and her husband Ted.

'She could only be Sirius's daughter,' said Andromeda certainly when Dora introduced us. 'I can see him shining through her smile.'

The Wednesday after the wedding I was transferred to The Burrow, joining Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Fred and George. It was pretty uncomfortable sharing with Ginny again. Every so often I received a look from her which to me clearly said I wasn't welcome here. However, she never said anything. Anyway, it appeared The Burrow had become the unofficial headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix seeing as there were so many Protection Charms on it when I arrived. And that Saturday night Harry was to be brought here too.

'The plan is,' growled Moody, 'to move Potter here avoiding as much trouble as possible.'

I was sat in the living room of The Burrow next to Ron and Hermione. This was the first Order meeting that we'd ever been allowed into. Moody at first had objected to Ginny and I being present seeing as we were still underage but when Kingsley pointed out what I'd said at the start of the holiday, Ginny and I were allowed to listen in.

'Mundungus, here,' continued Moody, stumping around the room, 'came up with the idea to use several decoys in case Voldemort's Death Eaters turn up. In this situation we are going to need seven volunteers, of age only,' he added as Ginny's hand shot up.

'Stupid age rule,' she muttered bitterly beside Hermione.

Ron, Hermione, Fred, George, Fleur and, against his will, Mundungus were chosen to be the fake Harrys. It was decided that Dedalus and Hestia were to go ahead to the Dursleys' house to move them out and at the same time they were Disapparated to their safe house, Harry was to leave Privet Drive for the last time with the guard. Hagrid, Lupin, Tonks, Bill, Kingsley, Moody and Mr Weasley were to be the guard, one Harry with each.

As they discussed all this I decided to leave the room. I quietly got up from my seat on the sofa next to Ron and returned to Ginny's room alone. I sat down on my mattress and took out my dragon. I held him tightly as I thought about Harry. I then pulled out my photo album and looked through it. All those pictures of me and Harry, of how we used to be. Why did it have to be so different now? In a matter of days we'd be leaving here to go Merlin knows where on the trail of these Horcruxes and –

I let out a sigh. It was pointless to hope and hopeless to dream …

Saturday night came sooner than I expected. At half past nine when the sun finally began to set the guard took off. I watched in the garden with Ginny and Mrs Weasley as the Thestrals and brooms and Dad's motorbike disappeared into the night sky. All I could hope was that they came back. I stood silently in the yard with the other two. I just stared into the sky.

'I'll go make us some tea,' said Mrs Weasley after a few minutes.

She bustled off inside leaving me and Ginny alone in the garden. I glanced at her from behind my hair to see she was watching me. I hastily looked back into the sky.

'I hope they get back all right,' I said. I didn't like the uncomfortable silence we were in.

'Me too,' replied Ginny.

We stood in silence a little longer. Behind us I could hear Mrs Weasley moving about in the kitchen preparing some tea and whatnot. I decided it would probably be better to go inside. I turned and headed for the kitchen door.

'Just so you know, Jenna,' said Ginny suddenly. I stopped and looked back at her. She was staring coldly back at me. 'You had your chance with him. Now it's my turn.'

'I don't know what you're talking about,' I said casually. However, I didn't move as I knew more was to come.

'I've seen the way you look at him,' said Ginny. 'The way you'd stare at him and looked away when you thought he'd noticed. Seen the glimmer of hope in your eyes. Harry may have broken up with me but I will always be his girlfriend. You can't change that.'

Anger burned in my heart as she said that.

'People change, Ginny,' I said slowly. 'None of us know how this fight will affect him. None of us even know if he will live. I'd say it's pretty confident of you to assume Harry will come back to you if he survives.'

'Harry loves me,' snapped Ginny. 'And I don't care what crap you say, Harry will still love me after this fight.'

I looked at her a moment longer, then said, 'You don't know the meaning of love.' Ginny stared at me angrily. I just shrugged and walked back inside. I looked back at her as Mrs Weasley handed me a cup of tea. Ginny had turned her back to me. I sighed and ran my hand through my hair. The sooner we left the better.

The wait for the guard to return with Harry was a long one. Half past eleven was when Ron and Tonks' Portkey was due back. We heard the pop of the Portkey arriving but when the three of us ran outside all there was on the ground was a rusty oilcan. Mrs Weasley let out a cry of shock as my heart skipped a beat. Where were Ron and Tonks? Had something happened? Our fears increased when the second Portkey appeared and neither Fred or Mr Weasley were there.

'Where are they?' I muttered worriedly. 'They should be back …'

I waited outside as Mrs Weasley ran inside to check her clock. There wasn't much use in that seeing as it always pointed to "danger" now. I heard it strike midnight. I jumped as another pop echoed in the garden. Spinning round I saw a large shadow getting up from the ground. It was Hagrid! That meant Harry, the real one, would be with him!

'Harry!' I shouted and sure enough, he looked up as Mrs Weasley and Ginny came running at my shout. Harry was instantly pulled into one of Mrs Weasley's hugs.

'Where are the others?' she cried as she let go. She was in a right state.

'What d'you mean?' panted Harry. 'Isn't anyone else back?

'No,' I said. 'No one. You're the first.'

'The Death Eaters were waiting for us,' said Harry. My heart skipped a beat. 'We were surrounded the moment we took off – they knew it was tonight – I don't know what happened to anyone else.'

My heart plummeted. This was what I feared, losing more of my family. I couldn't lose them, I couldn't lose Tonks or Lupin! I instantly turned away to try and get a grip on myself. I couldn't think like that. I knew in my heart of hearts that they were all right. They just had to be!

I returned to the house with Mrs Weasley and started to gather some medical supplies for the others in case there were injuries. There was bound to be. Ginny and Harry were still out in the garden. I watched them out of the window. Minutes later a fourth blue light appeared in the garden and my heart leapt as I saw Lupin appear. George, however, was injured. He was brought inside by Lupin and Harry. I gasped as I saw his face covered in blood; his ear had been severed off. I handed Mrs Weasley the potion box and she started to heal him. I then turned to go greet Lupin.

'Lupin!' I gasped as he suddenly grabbed Harry unceremoniously by the arm and dragged him into the kitchen.

'Oi!' shouted Hagrid. 'Let go of him! Let go of Harry!'

'What creature sat in the corner, the first time that Harry Potter entered my office at Hogwarts?' he asked angrily. I'd never seen him like this. He even shook Harry by the shirt. 'Answer me!'

'Lupin!' I shouted. 'Let go of him!'

'A – a Grindylow in a tank, wasn't it?'

Lupin released Harry as Hagrid roared, 'Wha' was tha' about?'

'I'm sorry, Harry, but I had to check,' said Lupin tersely. 'We've been betrayed. Voldemort knew that you were being moved tonight and the only people who could have told him were directly involved in the plan. You might have been an impostor.'

I let out a breath as Lupin said that. Him and his methods. Course, Hagrid didn't know why Lupin hadn't done the same to him to which the reply was, 'You're half-giant. The Polyjuice Potion is designed for human use only.' Fair enough.

I went back into the living room to help Mrs Weasley with George. From the kitchen I could hear Lupin give Harry the third degree about the fact he used Expelliarmus against a Death Eater because it was Stan Shunpike. He had a point though. Harry always used that spell as his first defence. He wouldn't kill an innocent person.

'So you think I should have killed Stan Shunpike?' Harry shouted angrily at him.

'Of course not,' said Lupin. I could tell he was restraining himself from really letting rip at Harry like he had at me before. 'But Death Eaters – frankly most people! – would have expected you to attack back! Expelliarmus is a useful spell, Harry, but the Death Eaters seem to think it is your signature move, and I urge you not to let it become so!'

'I won't blast people out of my way just because they're there,' said Harry. 'That's Voldemort's job.'

I didn't hear Lupin's reply as Hagrid just managed to get through the door at that moment but I knew it would have been a rather scathing one.

Over the next half an hour the rest of the groups returned, Hermione and Kingsley first, then Mr Weasley and Fred. And to our great relief George also stirred. It was typical of him that the first thing he said to Fred was a joke about his missing ear. I just shook my head, glad that he was all right. A little while after the last group, Ron and Tonks finally appeared. She instantly ran into Lupin's arms and explained what happened. As I watched I had an odd feeling in my bones … like I suddenly didn't belong in Lupin's life … It was really weird.

Bill and Fleur were the last to return on their Thestral. But there was no sign of Moody or Mundungus.

'Voldemort's curse hit Mad-Eye full in the face, he fell backwards off his broom and –' Bill said, 'there was nothing we could do, nothing, we had half a dozen of them on our own tail …'

I couldn't believe it. Moody was dead. But … he was always such a good fighter, a great mentor. Constant vigilance, that's what he always told us. And he was gone. I just couldn't believe it. None of us could.

'Here.' Bill had got out a bottle of Firewhisky and poured everyone a glass. He flicked his wand and each of us got a glass. He held his own up and then said, 'Mad-Eye.'

There was a chorus of, 'Mad-Eye.' and everyone drunk. I would have too, I just didn't like the idea of drinking Firewhisky. Didn't believe in drinking alcohol but I still raised my glass to the fallen warrior.

Within moments though Lupin changed the subject to find out what happened. Mundungus had fled and we knew someone had betrayed us to Voldemort. The question was, who? The only bonus was that Voldemort hadn't known about the seven Harrys and so had acted as Moody had predicted. Attacking the one with the strongest protector first.

'Yes, and zat eez all very good,' snapped Fleur, 'but still eet does not explain 'ow zey knew we were moving 'Arry tonight, does eet? Somebody must 'ave been careless. Somebody let slip ze date to an outsider. Eet eez ze only explanation for zem knowing ze date but not ze 'ole plan.'

Nobody dared to contradict Fleur but her insinuation seemed to have been taken to heart by Hagrid. I looked behind me to see him sitting in the corner hiccoughing with tears rolling into his beard. I knew he'd already been tricked by Voldemort once when we were in the first year for a dragon egg but it couldn't possibly have happened again? And by the sounds of his outburst Harry seemed to be thinking along the same lines as me.

'If someone made a mistake,' he said in a quieter tone than first used, 'let something slip, I know they didn't mean to do it. It's not their fault. We've got to trust each other. I trust all of you, I don't think Voldemort anyone in this room would ever sell me to Voldemort.'

After the silence that followed Harry's mini speech, Lupin excused himself to find Kingsley who'd left before Bill and Fleur had got back. Bill said that he'd go which instantly had me, Tonks and Fleur all asking where. They were going to recover Moody's body. Mrs Weasley too wanted them to wait but it was between them getting it first or the Death Eaters. They turned to leave but I followed Lupin into the kitchen.

'Lupin!' I called to stop him. He turned to look at me but I had nothing to say. After a few seconds though I said, 'Be careful, all right?' He just watched me for a moment longer before leaving.

When I returned to the sitting room I saw another argument in process, this time over Harry wanting to leave. I felt a twinge in my stomach as I worked out what it was about. Everyone was against him leaving seeing as we just risked our lives to get him. To change the subject Mrs Weasley asked where Hedwig was but Harry didn't respond. I think I knew what that meant.

'Wait 'til it gets out that yeh did it again, Harry,' Hagrid said next. 'Escaped him, fought him off when he was right on top of yeh!'

Harry, however, didn't believe he'd done anything. It was his wand. But as Hermione pointed out, how could his wand react without Harry's instructions? I watched as Harry rebuffed all the explanations people gave him and I could see that something was bothering him. It must have been his scar, it must be hurting again because moments later he strode out the house. Ron, Hermione and I looked at each other before following him.

We saw him walking over to the gate around the garden. I felt a surge of sympathy as I watched. He had to deal with so much and no one, not even Ginny, could see how much it hurt him. They knew it hurt but they didn't know the real extent of it. I could though because I'd known him so long and only I could identify with him because I too had lost my parents. As the three of us watched though Harry suddenly fell to the ground, gripping the fence.

'Harry!' gasped Hermione and I.

The three of us ran over to him. I caught his wrist as he started to fall while Ron grabbed his shoulders.

Voices … two of them in a dark room … one was Voldemort's, the other weak and frail … an old man sat in the corner of the room, cowering from Voldemort …

I let go of Harry's wrist and looked at him. He was still out of it, gripping the gate tightly while trying to keep standing. I'd just seen inside of Harry's head. I done this before, back in the fourth year. I'd seen what Harry had just seen, a man being tortured by Voldemort. And it was Ollivander, the wand maker. Once Harry had regained himself he confirmed that was what he'd seen.

'But it was supposed to have stopped!' cried Hermione. 'You scar – it wasn't supposed to do this any more! You mustn't let that connection open up again – Dumbledore wanted you to close your mind!' Harry didn't reply. 'Harry, he's taking over the Ministry and the newspapers and half the wizarding world! Don't let him inside your head too!'

'Hermione, lay off him!' I snapped, standing between them. 'He didn't mean to go inside Voldemort's head again, it was an accident.' I then looked at Harry. 'But she's right. You've got to close your mind, Harry, no matter how tempting it is to find out what he's up to. He's already used this against you once. You don't want it happening again.'

The shock of losing Moody hung over the house for the days that followed but we had little time to dwell on it as the arrangements for Bill and Fleur's wedding were more important and we were all kept busy. It was almost impossible for Harry, Ron, Hermione and I to get together to discuss what we were going to do as soon as Harry and I were of age. However, on that subject, Harry had a little shock for me.

'What?' I gasped. 'Harry, I thought we were in this together?'

'I can't let you come,' said Harry in a low voice to me. He'd managed to get me out of the house with him to hang some laundry up on Monday evening. 'You're not of age for another four days after the wedding and I can't wait that long. I need to get out of here as soon as possible.'

'Harry, I promised you that I'd stick with you,' I said, pegging up a sheet. 'You of all people know I tend to keep my promises!'

'Jenna, I can't risk you coming,' said Harry. 'The Trace on you will lead the Ministry to where we go and if Voldemort manages to take control before we leave, you'll give him our positions. I can't let you come because they'll be drawn to you and will hurt you first to get to me!'

'Then leave later! You're not going without me!'

'You're not coming and that's final!' snapped Harry. He strode angrily away leaving me with the rest of the washing. I watched as he walked off feeling completely betrayed. He hadn't wanted me to leave him and now he didn't want me to come.

'Bloody hypocrite,' I muttered to myself as I finished hanging the laundry.

There was now a tension present between me and Harry circulating around us. Harry knew I wanted to come and help him and I knew he wasn't going to let me and I was completely against it. He needed all the help he could get and by pushing me away, it was one less mind to help him. Eventually I reached a silence with him about being left behind and resigned myself to helping him prepare whenever Hermione and I had a free moment.

'And how did you manage to get away?' Harry asked us. We took a perch on his camp bed and I dragged out the books and my bag Hermione had hidden in Ron's wardrobe.

'Oh, Ron's mum forgot that she asked Ginny and me to change the sheets yesterday,' said Hermione. She instantly started going through the books she and I had collected together.

'And I'd already cleaned up the breakfast things,' I added.

While Hermione and I continued going through the things they'd need when they left, we discussed the death of Moody. It was pretty certain that he'd been killed though Lupin and Bill hadn't been able to recover a body. I still felt quite sad when I thought about it. Harry certainly went to far when he said the Death Eaters probably did the same to his body that they did to Mr Crouch's in the fourth year. Hermione burst into tears and, seeing as Harry was being very good at ignoring people's feelings at the moment, Ron instantly jumped to comfort her.

That was another thing. Over my few days at The Burrow before Harry got here I'd noticed a change in Ron and Hermione. Ron was being nice to her. He wasn't being as sarcastic as he usually had been. It was really strange. They still hadn't told each other how they felt but when I walked in on them having a private moment they just jumped apart and looked embarrassed. I thought it better not to ask. But still it was sweet to watch him comfort her about Moody even if I did feel like a third wheel next to them. Next moment though I was protecting myself from a copy of Monster Book of Monsters that Ron had just thrown from him after it got dropped on his foot.

'What with all those books anyway?' he asked, hoping up and down.

'Just trying to decide which ones to take with us,' replied Hermione. 'When we're looking for the Horcruxes.'

'Oh, of course,' said Ron sarcastically. 'I forgot we'll be hunting down Voldemort in a mobile library.'

Hermione laughed dryly while I said, 'No harm in having a few books with us if they're likely to help.' I shot Harry a look.

'Listen,' he said, ignoring my look. 'I know you said, after Dumbledore's funeral, that you wanted to come with me.'

'Here he goes,' said Ron to Hermione and I, rolling his eyes.

'As we knew he would,' said Hermione.

I said nothing, looking at a copy of A Beginners Guide to Transfiguration instead of giving Harry another bitter look.

'You know, I think I will take Hogwarts: A History. Even if we're not going back there, I don't think I'd feel right if I didn't have it with –'

'Listen!' shouted Harry.

'No, Harry, you listen,' said Hermione over him. 'We're coming with you. That was decided months ago – years really.'

'But –'

'Shut up,' said Ron.

'– are you sure you've thought this through?' asked Harry.

We all had, well, those of us who were going. Hermione had been packing with me for days whenever we could so that we were ready to leave in a moments notice if we had to and sneaking Moody's supply of Polyjuice Potion from under Mrs Weasley's nose. On top of that, Hermione had been working hard on some complex spells and had modified her parents memories so that it was like she didn't exist to them and Ron had created a doppelganger of himself using the ghoul in the attic so that anyone who came looking for him would think he's got Spattergroit. I, of course, had stolen books from Lupin's library and packed them in my bag in case of us needing to leave. If Harry thought we hadn't prepared for this then he was seriously wrong!

We sat in silence when Ron came back from showing Harry the ghoul in the attic. It was only broken by Hermione and mine's noise while we sorted the books. Noises from downstairs also started. Mrs Weasley was shouting at someone again.

'Ginny's probably left a speck of dust on a poxy napkin ring,' muttered Ron. 'I dunno why the Delacours have got to come two days before the wedding.'

The conversation then turned to what was going to happen when they left. I merely sat in silence and started to re-read my copy of Fantastic Beasts. I still couldn't believe Harry was making me stay behind. I bet he wouldn't even come back and get me when I was of age. I felt completely betrayed by him. He knew I could help and he tells me I'm to stay here and probably go back to Hogwarts as well.

'And once we get hold of it, how do you destroy a Horcrux?' asked Ron.

I looked up, interested. How do you destroy a Horcrux? Hermione had the answer. Once she'd explained how she got the answer that is. She'd "summoned" a book from Dumbledore's personal library and they come zooming to her.

'When I went upstairs to get my things, it – it just occurred to me that the more we knew about them, the better it would be … and I was alone in there … so I tried … and it worked. They flew straight in through the open window and I – I packed them.'

'Nice one, Hermione,' I said. 'Can't believe we never thought of that before. But wouldn't Dumbledore, if he was still alive, be angry that we took them. Surely he would have given them to us if he thought we needed them?'

'I can't believe Dumbledore would have been angry,' she said imploringly. 'It's not as though we're going to use the information to make a Horcrux, is it?'

'Can you hear us complaining?' said Ron.

She pulled out a large leather black book from our pile called Secrets of the Darkest Arts. Apparently it was a terrible book full of Dark magic. Hermione even thought it was the book Voldemort learned how to create Horcruxes from even though he asked Slughorn how it was done. With each Horcrux made your soul becomes more unstable and so making six must have been ridiculous according to what Hermione told us she'd read. There was a way to put the soul back together but it was very painful and only through remorse could it be done. Yeah, Voldemort was really going to start feeling sorry for all the people he'd killed.

'So does it say how to destroy Horcruxes in that book?' asked Harry.

'Yes,' said Hermione, turning the pages as if they were contaminated with something, 'because it warns Dark wizards how strong they have to make the enchantments on them. From all that I've read, what Harry did to Riddle's diary was one of the few really foolproof ways of destroying a Horcrux.'

'What, stabbing it with a Basilisk fang?' asked Harry.

'That's what it says,' I replied. I glanced at the page Hermione had turned to. 'Horcruxes have powerful magic protecting them so ordinary methods of destroying things like Reducto or Diffindo would merely bounce off them. They wouldn't even leave a scratch.'

'Oh, well, lucky we've got such a large supply of Basilisk fangs, then,' said Ron. 'I was wondering what we going to do with them.'

'It doesn't have to be a Basilisk fang,' said Hermione patiently. 'It has to be something so destructive that the Horcrux can't repair itself. Basilisk venom only has one antidote, and it's incredibly rare –'

'– phoenix tears,' said Harry.

'Exactly. Our problem is that there are very few substances as destructive as Basilisk venom, and they're all dangerous to carry around with you. That's a problem we're going to have to solve, though, because ripping, smashing or crushing a Horcrux won't do the trick. You've got to put it beyond magical repair.

That was all well and good but where were we going to get these things even if we do find the Horcruxes?

'But even if we wreck the thing it lives in,' continued Ron, 'why can't the bit of soul in it just go and live in something else?'

'Because a Horcrux is the complete opposite of a human being.' Ron and Harry didn't seem to understand so Hermione carried on. 'Look, if I picked up a sword right now, Ron, and ran you through with it, I wouldn't damage your soul at all.'

'Which would be a real comfort to me, I'm sure,' said Ron.

'It should be, actually,' I said, ignoring Harry's laughing. 'What Hermione's saying is that whatever happens to your body, your soul will survive, untouched.'

'But it's the other way round with a Horcrux,' said Hermione. 'The fragment of soul inside it depends on its container, its enchanted body, for survival. It can't exist without it.'

'Meaning when the case containing a Horcrux is destroyed, the soul is with it,' I finished.

So we had covered how to destroy a Horcrux but, as Ron pointed out, how could Ginny have still been possessed by the diary if the soul depended on it. Hermione answered that, telling us that Ginny was emotionally close to the diary having poured her heart into it. That was how Voldemort's soul was able to possess Ginny.

The silence that followed didn't last long as there was a resounding crash from downstairs. Minutes later Mrs Weasley, looking very dishevelled, was in the room and Harry was pointing his wand at her.

'I'm so sorry to break up this cosy little gathering,' she said. 'I'm sure you all need your rest … but there are wedding presents stacked in my room that need sorting out and I was under the impression that you had agreed to help.'

We had no choice but to end the conversation and Hermione and I left to sort out the presents. We had to sort them into piles of who they were for from whom and what size they were. I think that was unnecessary but Mrs Weasley seemed determined for us to keep talking to a minimum.

'So what's going to happen then?' I asked Hermione when Mrs Weasley had left. 'When you guys go gallivanting off who knows where.'

'What do you mean?' asked Hermione. 'Aren't you coming?'

'Harry's not letting me,' I said resignedly, 'and he won't leave later so that the Trace on me is broken.'

'Well we can come back and get you,' said Hermione. 'Or one of the Order members could escort you to where we'll be.'

'Harry won't do that, Hermione, you know that. He won't tell anyone where he's going or what he's doing and the last thing he's going to do is come back for me when it will put everyone in danger. I've got no chance of helping him when I promised I would.'

Hermione was silent for and we continued sorting the presents. Then, she said, 'Well then we'll arrange a place we can meet. You can Apparate, right?'

'Yeah, I got the basics,' I said. 'It won't be legal though.'

'That won't matter,' said Hermione. 'One of us can Apparate to an agreed point the day after your birthday so as to get you and then take you wherever we're hiding at the time.'

'But where?' I asked. 'The only place I decently know is London.'

'Then we'll choose somewhere in London where we can meet you. You can Apparate to that place the day after your birthday and we can get you. Then Harry can't complain and we won't be putting anyone else in danger.'

Hermione and I agreed that the two of us would meet up at Tottenham Court Road at eleven pm the day after my birthday so that she could take me to wherever they were hiding out at that time. With that decided we discussed quietly what things should be put in my bag in case we left anything behind while she put some of my things in her bag. The one thing I insisted that went with her was to be my toy dragon. I'd have my bag on me at all times which meant in the extreme case I was captured or something by the Death Eaters then the Blacks wouldn't be able to get their hands on the family locket. I wasn't going to give it up easily.

The following morning the Delacours arrived and were warmly greeted by Fleur and Mrs Weasley. I'd never met any other foreign wizards besides the ones who'd come to Hogwarts in the fourth year. Mr Delacour was a short, plump wizard with a small black beard whereas Mrs Delacour was as elegant as her two daughters, Fleur's little sister Gabrielle standing beside her. I watched them greet each other with the usual feeling of longing for a family of my own to do that with. I'd never really felt a mother's embrace before and I always longed to have my parents back. Lupin was a great substitute for them but lately I've just felt I didn't belong with him anymore, like I'd overstayed my welcome in his life.

The next day was Harry's birthday and his was officially of age. Lucky him. I got down to breakfast with Hermione and Ginny to see him already unwrapping his presents. I could see mine hidden behind the mess. I'd got him something I knew he'd like. It was a small photo album filled with copies of photos of the years we spent together before we knew about Hogwarts. Sort of a reminder of what we were like before we found out about the wizarding world. At this time of his life I thought a reminder of what things were like would be nice for him.

Hermione volunteered to pack his new things into her bag and I followed her back upstairs. Ron joined us and was still spluttering about the fact Hermione had said she needed to wait for the last of his pants from the wash. I just sniggered silently to myself at the horrified thought probably going through Ron's head. We went back downstairs when Hermione had packed his presents and Ron, for some reason, burst into Ginny's room.

The sight that met my eyes made my chest suddenly constrict and my stomach twist and I knew perfectly well why Ron had wanted to open Ginny's door for inside her room she and Harry were kissing. I gasped silently as I saw it. They sprang apart when they heard the door bang against the wall. The two of them stared at us but the moment Harry looked at me after Hermione and Ron, I walked away. I hurried back downstairs and out into the garden where I tried to get a grip on myself.

'You got over him,' I told myself. I was crouching on the ground behind the back of the house. 'You don't have feelings for him. What Tonks said didn't describe what you've felt for him. You want Noah …' As I said that, I stopped. I hadn't thought of Noah since school finished. I'd forgotten about my own ex-boyfriend the moment I left him. I stood up and ran my hands over my face. 'Why does it hurt so much?' I muttered to myself. 'Why does it have to be so hard now?'

I started when I heard voices coming from the other side of the garden and made a dash back indoors through the back door.

That evening was to be Harry's birthday dinner and I had determinedly avoided him for the rest of the day by hiding in the same place in the garden I'd hid in the previous Christmas holidays. I still hadn't gotten over the kiss and it kept replaying in my mind. I returned as the party was being set up and busied myself away from Harry by decorating the garden with small lanterns Mrs Weasley had lit. By seven o'clock people began arriving and I was pleased to see Lupin had come with Tonks. However, a message then came which seemed to change his mind about being there.

A Patronus in the form of a weasel came streaking over the sky and landed on the table. Sitting up on its hind legs, it began to speak using Mr Weasley's voice. So this was how the Order used them to communicate.

'Minister for Magic coming with me.' and it dissolved.

'We shouldn't be here,' said Lupin instantly. He walked over to me and grabbed my wrist. 'Harry – I'm sorry – I'll explain another time – come on, Jenna.'

'What? Why?' I asked as Lupin led me away and took Tonks' wrist as well. 'Why are leaving?'

I didn't get an answer. Instead I felt a pressure on my chest and darkness took over me as Lupin Apparated the three of us away. A few seconds later I felt the pressure release and I took a stumbled step back as my feet hit the floor. I still wasn't used to Apparating seeing as I only mastered it a couple months back and Side-Along with Lupin was even worse.

Regaining my bearings, I instantly said, 'What's the deal, Lupin? Why did we leave? It's Harry's party.'

'We're not welcome in places where the Minister is,' said Lupin bluntly and he walked off into the kitchen. I let out an annoyed breath and stalked off upstairs to my room.

The rest of the night I spent in there, watching the sun slowly recede behind the hills. I sat up on my bed with my back against the headboard fiddling with my Mum's necklace. The feather in it tickled my fingers and I thought absently of what Mum was like. She was kind and friendly and beautiful; liked practical jokes seeing as she was a Marauder; was a bright witch; and she loved animals and magical beasts …

My mind drifted back to what Lupin had told me about the spell Mum had put on me. She had done it because she thought something had happened due to Fawkes healing her while she was pregnant. What could have possibly happened from being healed by phoenix tears.

I suddenly leapt back off my bed as a bright red and gold light started beside me. Peering up from the other side of my bed I saw a flash of what I was sure was fire and gasped at what I saw. There hovering over my bed was a large, magnificent bird with the brightest red and gold plumage I'd ever seen. It flapped its wings gently up and down as it stayed level above my bed, its beady eyes watching me. He had a letter in his beak.

'Fawkes,' I breathed. Fawkes dropped a letter on my bed and let out a small caw as he looked at me. I got up and sat back down on my bed, picking up the letter. 'What's this?' I asked him.

A gift for you, said Fawkes. Again I jumped. I could hear a voice along with the gentle song of the phoenix. I really hated these surprises I got from being an Animagus. Use it well, concluded Fawkes and he disappeared in another flash of fire. I stared amazed at the place where Fawkes had just been before looking down at the letter. It was addressed to me in emerald ink. I turned it over cautiously and opened it. Inside was a piece of parchment, and six red and gold feathers. My eyes widened when I saw them.

'Phoenix feathers,' I breathed. I took one out the envelope and held in front of me. I ran my finger over the long feather. It was so soft and warm under my skin. 'But why?'

I placed the six feathers on to my bed and pulled out the letter. I unfolded it and looked at it.

'It's from Dumbledore!' I gasped. 'But how –?' I cut myself off. Knowing Dumbledore, he would have said questions later. So I read the letter.

Dear Miss Black

This is a letter I have written to you in the absence of placing you in my will as I refuse
the Ministry to have control over Fawkes until the reading of my will and the information I
am about to relay to you is of the utmost secrecy. Fawkes, I trust, will have delivered the
copy of my will (I have shortened it to the priorities so as not to bore you) to you the day
my will is read to Mr Potter, Mr Weasley and Miss Granger, and so you are reading it the
same time that Minister Scrimgeour reads out what the three persons above have
received.

Now time for the formalities. I, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, of sound mind
and body (besides my right arm, of course) hereby leave some of my personal
possessions to the following students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry: a
Mr Harry James Potter, Mr Ronald Bilius Weasley, Miss Hermione Jean Granger, and
Miss Jennifer May Black.

Even when he was dead, Dumbledore still managed to slip in a few jokes.

I skimmed the part of the letter which told me what Harry, Ron and Hermione had got. Ron had been left Dumbledore's Deluminator, whatever that was; Hermione had been given a book called the Tales of Beedle the Bard, a book I knew to contain the wizarding equivalent of Muggle fairytales; and Harry had been given the very first Snitch he'd ever caught in a Quidditch match, the one he'd almost swallowed. What strange things to leave us, I thought. I wonder what he's left me, though I had a vague idea what it was.

To Jennifer May Black, I leave six phoenix feathers to join the first that hangs on the
necklace of Tala Megan Lupin, given to her mother on her seventeenth birthday.

What? Instantly I took off my mother's necklace and looked at the feather. It wasn't a phoenix feather. It was way too small and a dappled white colour. A phoenix feather was about three times the length and bright gold and red, like the ones lying beside me on my bed. I turned back to the letter to see there was more writing and of a much more serious tone.

Unlike with the items I have bequeathed to Mr Potter, Mr Weasley and Miss Granger, it
is important that you understand from the start to why you have received this item.

Seventeen years ago, Miss Tala Megan Lupin was involved in an Order mission and
was left gravely injured. I accompanied her then boyfriend, Sirius Black, to her side
where we were unable to heal her as there was no evidence of what curse she had
been hit with. In desperation Mr Black begged me to call Fawkes to heal her. Though
reluctant, I did so as I too was not willing to let the young woman die.

Fawkes healed Miss Lupin and her life was spared. A little under six months later she
gave birth to a baby girl whom she had been pregnant with during the attack. Only a
week after the birth, Miss Lupin, now Mrs Black having married her then boyfriend, came
to me after receiving a disturbing premonition. The premonition, she recounted to me,
included the death of herself, the death of her friends, James and Lily Potter, and her
daughter, then aged seventeen, displaying magic which was not that of an ordinary
witch.

In the next few days it became evident that the baby possessed some magic belonging
to Fawkes. Setting the carpet alight by happily clapping her hands revealed that. Miss
Lupin return to me with the baby and news of another premonition. She had caught the
glimpse of a future fight where the above mentioned and herself were alive. For this
reason, I requested Miss Lupin to Bind the phoenix magic in her daughter for the time
being. But, as Miss Lupin predicted, she was killed before we could discuss the matter in
greater detail.

It became clear to me by the girl's fifth year that the Binding Spell placed on her was
starting to wear off. By her sixth year, it was more than evident but, of course,
unnoticeable to anyone who was not aware of her past. I knew it was time to act,
however, under her Uncle's instructions, I was not allowed to reveal to her the nature of
her magic.

I now advise you to be wary of the powers you possess and to use them as you see fit.
Through personal research I have determined that these powers were given to you for a
reason and, when they have been used for what they are intended for, they will leave
you so they will be limited. Choose carefully with how you use them but remember: for
some death is but another adventure.

Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore
Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

I just stared at the letter once I'd finished it. So it was Dumbledore who'd wanted to bind my magic. And evidently, in his eyes at least, for good reasons though what they were he hadn't revealed. He'd just told me to use them wisely. He didn't even tell me what bits of Fawkes' magic I had or what it was I could do or why he'd given me the feathers. All I could be sure about was that the magic was going to be released soon and then would eventually leave me. I picked up the feathers that lay beside me. I was meant to do something with these eventually. But what it was … I didn't know.

I was to return to The Burrow the next day. Least I was saved doing any duties before the wedding. It was to take place at one o'clock and that gave me the whole morning to get ready. Having learnt some tricks since the Yule Ball in the fourth year I didn't need to rely on Tonks to help me look right. For the wedding I had a dress to wear which Andromeda and Ted had actually bought for me. Their excuse was that they owed me seventeen years worth of presents seeing as they hadn't ever met me before. I felt really guilty about accepting it but they wouldn't take no for an answer and so I was left to get ready in my room while the rest of the Tonks' got ready elsewhere.

The dress itself was beautiful. Personally I would never have chosen it if I'd seen it. It was a long white dress which rested on my chest and zipped up at the back so it was quite tight fitting around the chest and waist, even giving me a bit of cleavage. As I put it on I had a feeling Tonks had been partly involved in choosing it. It had a halter-neck made from a red and gold ribbon, the colours blending into each other around my neck, and had another red and gold sash tied at the back around the waist.

I took a moment and looked at myself once I'd finished getting ready. I looked almost unrecognisable to myself. I'd loosely curled my hair with a Muggle method recommended in Witch Weekly for those underage so I had long black and red tresses weaving in out of each other, my bangs straight and crossing over my forehead and eyes; as for makeup I'd simply gone for a bit of mascara and red eye shadow; I wore my red earrings again Hermione had given me before and my owl feather necklace, the Key hidden under my dress. It just wasn't me but strangely enough I felt comfortable in it.

'I guess dresses and makeup aren't that bad,' I muttered, turning slightly to look at the back. The red and gold sash flowed nicely down the back of the dress. 'I guess I could start wearing skirts a little more seeing as Lupin had brought them for me. Start acting like a girl.' I snickered slightly at that. Well, I had packed some in case I wore out all my trousers.

I span round when I heard the door open. It was Lupin.

'You ready?' he asked. I nodded. Lupin smiled, the first I'd seen in a while, and came over to me. He gently took my hands and kissed my forehead. 'I've never seen you look so beautiful,' he told me. 'I'm so proud of you, Jenna. Now, let's get going.'

We joined Tonks, Andromeda and Ted downstairs in the living room. Tonks and Andromeda instantly started commenting on how beautiful I looked when they saw me. I have to admit, I did blush slightly at it. Taking Lupin's hand, I held it tightly and braced myself for the Disapparation from Moonlake cottage. A few moments later I felt the familiar pressure on me and saw nothing but darkness. I gripped Lupin's hand tightly as he pulled me onwards. Seconds later I opened my eyes to see The Burrow before me.

After being shown my seat I walked off to try and find the others. I saw Ron, Fred and George were all busy showing people to their seats so went off to find Hermione. She was in Ginny's room, luckily alone.

'Jenna, you look amazing!' gasped Hermione after she'd finished strangling me. She was wearing a long, floaty lilac dress and matching heels. 'You did this completely without me?'

'I'm not totally useless when it comes to dresses,' I said, a glare on my face but also a smile. 'You taught me well, master,' I added, doing a bow with my hands together in front of me.

'Oh, very funny,' said Hermione.

Our conversation was cut short when Mrs Weasley introduced us to Ron's Auntie Muriel who had wanted to see what we looked like. At first she seemed like a nice old lady of one hundred and whatever but she was very harsh. Hermione apparently had bad posture and skinny ankles. As for me, my hair was way too long and I was too thin. Tell me something I didn't know. We managed to excuse ourselves and left Muriel to Mrs Weasley. Hermione still had to finish helping the others and I was left free for a while so I returned to Ginny's room.

I found my bag hidden above her wardrobe where I'd left it before my unexpected exit yesterday. Half of me had thought she would have tossed it out but obviously she hadn't found it. Grabbing it I left her room and went up to Ron's room. Finding the bag that Hermione and I had been carefully packing, I carefully dug into it and pulled out my toy dragon. I checked my locket was still in it. It was. Hearing Mrs Weasley's voice shouting that it was time for everyone to take their seats, I stuffed it in my bag before putting my bag into Hermione's small purse. I thought it would be easier for me to leave without anything with me and Hermione would never notice my bag in there as well. Putting it back in its place I left the room.

I got to my seat in the marquee next to Hermione's just in time. I said my apologies and sat down with her, Ron, Fred, George and obviously another Weasley relative judging by the red hair. Looking round I noticed Harry wasn't there. Where is he? I thought to myself as Mr and Mrs Weasley walked up the aisle and took their seats at the front. Bill and Charlie then came down the aisle dressed in their smartest dress robes. I was happy to see Bill didn't look at all like he'd been savaged by Greyback. I smiled as I watched them standing at the front. Bill looked a bit like a nervous school boy.

When Fleur came down the aisle the Veela blood in her became evident to me as she seemed to glow in her wedding dress. It was a beautiful white dress with a embroidered corset and her silvery hair flowed elegantly down her back. Ginny and Gabrielle, the bridesmaids, followed her in golden dresses.

The smile on my face remained as I watched the ceremony and the vows. It just seemed so surreal that something this normal could still happen in the middle of this war. As the wizard directing the service said, 'You may now kiss the bride.' my gaze left them briefly as my mind wandered. One day … maybe I'd have this, getting married. Walking down the aisle and promising myself to one man for the rest of my life. But as I imagined it the man's face was clouded. I couldn't see who it was I would fall in love with. Reality then hit back as I thought I might not even live past this next year.

I stood as the chairs which we had been sitting on rose gracefully into the air as the canvas walls of the marquee vanished, so that we were standing underneath a canopy supported on golden poles. The sun was glowing brightly over the orchard casting a golden glow over them. Beneath our feet a golden pool spread to form a dance floor under the tent and the chairs grouped themselves on it around the white tables that had now appeared. The band took their place where Bill and Fleur had got married at the front and people began to mingle as the music started.

I made my way through the crowd off the dance floor table to watch. I wasn't really one for dancing. I merely watched as everyone had a good time thinking, I don't belong here. I felt like an outsider. I stood with my arms folded, gripping my elbows, over my chest looking at everyone. After a while I grabbed a bottle of Butterbeer before making my way inside for a break from the noise. I took refuge in Ron's room and stood by the window so I could still look into the garden. I sighed as the feeling of not belonging here deepened.

'Jenna?' I looked up to see a curly-haired redhead standing in the doorway to Ron's room. 'Are you all right?' he said, coming inside.

'Er, not meaning to be rude or anything,' I said, staring at him. 'But do I know you?'

'It's me, Harry,' said the boy. I looked at him closely until I realised I could see Harry through the face. 'Just been to the toilet and I saw you in here. Wondered why you weren't outside.'

'Wow, never really pictured you as a redhead,' I muttered.

'Me neither.'

'And, um, I needed something from my bag. That's why I'm in here.'

'Oh, right.'

We stood in silence for a moment before I turned back round to the window.

'Thanks for the birthday present, Jen,' said Harry. I glanced back at him. 'It was a great gift. Brings back old memories.' Harry stepped up behind me and put his arms round my waist. My heart raced slightly as he did so. 'It's strange to see how much we've changed.'

'Yeah,' I agreed. I turned round, breaking the grip Harry had on me. I didn't want to risk Ginny walking in on us. It was then I really did get a full look at Harry. He was wearing black dress robes with a black bowtie and, even though he was posing as a Weasley, I could see the real Harry through it. 'You look really smart, Harry,' I said hesitantly.

'So do you,' replied Harry. 'Well, I mean, you look beautiful.'

I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks and covered it by saying, 'So, um, I'm just going to – I'm going back outside. You coming?'

Harry nodded and we went back outside together. Luckily though, one of Ron's real cousins came and asked me to dance and I was separated from Harry before Ginny could see us which I was relieved about. However, when I looked back at him I saw a very familiar glare on his face about it.

It wasn't bad dancing with one of Ron's cousins until he tried some funny business and put his hand somewhere where it wasn't welcome. As soon as he did it I stepped back from him and slapped his face and said, 'You try that again and you'll be getting more than a slap.' I then stalked off.

After that I kept myself busy by hiding on a table of French girls Fleur knew. I had a Butterbeer with me and sipped it every so often, looking around carefully in case anymore guys tried anything with me. But then something happened which made my blood go cold.

I'd seen something charging through the slowly darkening sky. A silver light came speeding towards The Burrow and landed down on the centre of the dance floor. A gleaming Patronus formed in the shape of a lynx and stood stiffly on its four legs. I stared at it in mounting fear. Something must have happened. The lynx opened its mouth and from it came Kingsley's deep voice.

'The Ministry has fallen. Scrimgeour is dead. They are coming.'

It all happened so fast. In a moments notice the sky darkened above us and the garden was filled with the noise of people Apparating around The Burrow. Chaos started immediately as people started running to the boundaries of the garden to Disapparate. I got up from my seat and ran to try and find Harry or one of the others. It was now or never. We had to leave now! Around me the Death Eaters were starting to fight members of the Order.

'Harry!' I shouted. 'Harry, where are you!'

I stopped and looked round desperately for him. He had to be somewhere. I finally found him with Hermione running towards Ron.

'Harry, wait!' I shouted at him.

He looked round. I saw him reach his hand out but whether he was telling me to hurry up or stop, I didn't know or care. I had to get to him. But the moment I was within reaching distance of him he vanished into thin air with a crack. He was gone. I stopped, panicking as I tried to think what to do. I came to the conclusion I had to help defend The Burrow.

As I went to retrieve my wand hidden beneath my dress, something caught me around my ankles and I was flung to the ground amongst the chaos of the other witches and wizards running to the barriers to Disapparate. I scrabbled to get back to my feet. I suddenly felt my body convulse and tense. I screamed in pain and crumpled on the grass. It felt like was being stabbed repeatedly by white hot knives. Seconds later though it seemed like forever the spell was lifted and I was pulled to my feet.

'Hello, precious,' said a smooth, cruel voice. It was high and dripped in sarcasm, a phoney baby voice. I closed my eyes as my chin was forced upwards by the cruel point of Bellatrix's wand. 'My, don't you look all dressed up … Did we interrupt something?' I could feel her hand gripping my throat. 'Tell me, how's the werewolf?'

'His name is Lupin,' I said. I merely felt a pain shoot up my spine and I let out another scream, tears starting to fall from my eyes.

'LESTRANGE!'

I opened my eyes to see Lupin running towards me with his wand raised. Tonks was just behind.

'Put your shield around us.' I didn't respond. 'Do it!' demanded Bellatrix. Still I refused. In front Lupin was preparing to fire a spell at us. 'Do it or I'll kill him here and now!'

'Stupefy!'

Lupin shot a spell at Bellatrix as Bellatrix removed her wand from my chin.

'Avada –'

'NO!'

I raised my shield as Lupin's spell shot from his wand. The blue shield encircled me and Bellatrix before she could finish the curse. The red sparks hit against it and were rebounded on to what was left of the already destroyed canopy. I stood surrounded by it, shaking with my eyes closed, protecting me and Bellatrix. I opened my eyes a few moments later to see Lupin was all right. He and Tonks were in front of us. They had their wands raised pointing at her.

'There's a good cub,' said Bellatrix silkily. Her lips ran against my face as she spoke. I felt her hand caress my cheek before her wand dug into it again. 'Now let's see what the werewolf wants …'

'Give me Jenna, right now,' said Lupin calmly. I looked worriedly up at him. He was holding his hand out, his wand still raised in the other. 'Release my niece!'

Bellatrix didn't respond. She just smiled her manic smile at him.

'RELEASE HER!' bellowed Lupin.

'You really think you're in a position to demand anything of me?' asked Bellatrix coolly. Lupin glared at her. 'You see … I could not only kill your little cub here,' she ran her wand tip over my cheek, 'but I could easily kill you and your new wife as well.'

Bellatrix snapped her fingers. I heard footsteps come from behind. Out of the corner of my eye I saw two more Death Eaters approach. They stood either side of us and she ordered me to extend my shield to cover them as well. I had no choice but to follow.

'Now I suggest you lower your wand.' Lupin didn't. Neither did Tonks. Bellatrix removed her wand from my cheek and pressed it into my chest. Lupin started forwards slightly. 'Lower your wand, werewolf!'

Reluctantly Lupin lowered it. My nerves were increasing and I was shaking badly in Bellatrix's grip. It was never Voldemort I had really feared. It was Bellatrix, always her as I was always told I was like her. I looked helplessly back at Lupin as he threw his wand to the ground. However, he kept his other hand raised to reach for me.

'I'm unarmed,' he said. 'Now give Jenna to me.' Bellatrix laughed.

'Ooh, I don't know,' she giggled. 'She's a lovely bargaining tool …'

Tonks made forwards to get me but Lupin threw his arm out in front of her.

'Don't!' he said warningly. 'If you make a move, Lestrange will kill her.'

Bellatrix laughed again.

'Oh, you're a smart one, werewolf,' she said. 'If only you were smart enough to stay away from us Blacks.' Lupin's glare turned even darker. 'So here's your chance. I'll let you and your little wife go free, unharmed … and you leave the girl with me.'

'No deal,' said Lupin instantly. 'Jenna is my child, my family!'

'You're wicked, Bellatrix!' shouted Tonks. 'She's just a girl!'

'Perhaps you're not taking me seriously. I guess I should show you I mean what I say.'

My body started aching again right from my heart as Bellatrix used the Cruciatus Curse on me again. I writhed in Bellatrix's arms. I screamed unable to hold it in or fight it.

'Please!' I screamed. 'Make it stop! Please!'

'Stop it!' bellowed Lupin.

Bellatrix lifted the spell. I fell forwards being held up by her arm, my knees weak and shaking badly. I took deep breaths to try and calm myself.

'You have a choice, werewolf,' said Bellatrix. All signs of sarcasm were gone from her voice. 'Renounce your claim over this girl and leave her with me or I'll kill her.' I was pulled straight by my hair. Bellatrix pressed her face against mine and dug her wand into my chest. 'Here and now in front of you.'

I looked desperately at Lupin. He couldn't leave me with her. She'd kill me if he did. But at the same time if he tried to get me then he and Tonks would also die. It was a stalemate, a catch twenty-two. It was heads you win, tails I lose on both sides. But there had to be a way for Lupin to get me free. I watched him carefully. My whole body was shaking. He merely stared back, his brown eyes looking for a way to stop the situation but unable to find one.

'Lupin,' I breathed. I shook my head slightly, tears rolling down my cheeks as I realised what he was going to do. 'Please … don't …'

'I have no choice,' replied Lupin.

'No!' I shouted. I tried to break Bellatrix's grip but she merely tightened it. 'Lupin, please, you can't!'

He closed his eyes and looked away. Then, slowly, 'I, Remus John Lupin –'

'No – Lupin!'

'Remus, you can't!' gasped Tonks. 'She's just a child!'

'I, Remus John Lupin –' he repeated.

'Don't do this!' I begged him not to. 'Lupin, please –!'

'– hereby renounce –'

'No –!'

'– my claim over Jennifer May Black.' My heart felt like it had stopped the moment he said those words. I just stared at him, unable to believe what he was doing. He looked back helplessly and finished, 'I disown her.'

'No!' I screamed. I dropped my shield and fought against Bellatrix's grip. She kept her hold on me. 'No, Lupin, please!'

'There's a good doggy,' said Bellatrix. 'We're done here.'

'No!'

I pulled against Bellatrix in one last attempt to get away before darkness surrounded me. A pressure started on my chest and I took in a sharp breath. The Burrow spun and vanished in front of me as I was Apparated away, a large dark room appearing moments later.

AN: first chapter of Deathly Hallows posted, woo! well, hope you enjoyed and please leave a review and tell me what you think. oh, and just a reminder to check out my other oneshots and story and review them too. cheers! ;) BlAcKdAuGhTeR