CHAPTER 38

~Sasuke~

"Never say that again. You don't belong here, and I don't want you to belong." I told her in a cold voice, guilt stabbing me when I saw her flinch, but I knew this would be the fastest way.

"Sas-" That's when we heard it, the ceiling was already starting to collapse, regardless of the small fire in here, reminding me that I didn't have that much time left with her and that she didn't have that much time left to escape either. I grabbed her face with my hands and turned it so she was starting at me. I crashed my mouth with hers with a big force, knocking the breath out of her. I kissed her roughly. The fear of not being able to see her even less kiss her again made me act that way, unthinking, careless, maybe even violent as strange and harsh as it sounded. Fire cursed through my veins like hot chakra, making my chest pound like crazy with life. I was already getting out of breath, but that didn't stop me. And it didn't stop her either, her hand –as well as mine- was clutching my hair, pulling me down as I pulled her to me.

I broke the kiss for a second, giving wide gasps. "Sakura…" I whispered, my voice husky, before kissing her again. This time I tried being more careful, so far she hadn't complained but as fierce as I was acting right now, I couldn't tell if I hurt her or not. It was extremely difficult, almost painful, trying to act consciously, to remember that I could hurt her, as intoxicated with her presence as I was right now. I brushed my mouth with hers more gently, slowly, making the moment last longer, trying to stretch it forever. Once, and again, and once more. I couldn't seem to stop saying her name as much as I couldn't stop kissing her. I knew that both things would be over very soon.

"Sakura." I whispered again, my head pressed to hers, breathing hard, eyes closed.

"Yo-You keep saying my name…why?" she asked in a shaky voice. I gave a low throaty chuckle because of this; I loved this type of reactions from her. Nostalgia hit me hard and I couldn't act strong anymore, not over something that was killing me from the inside. And I now knew exactly what it felt to crumble into pieces; it wasn't as metaphoric as it sounded.

"Don't leave…" I suddenly found myself begging. "Stay… please…"

"I'll stay." She promised in vain before reaching up to kiss me again. I knew I should stop her, this wasn't time to do this. My hands which were pressed on her face tightened slightly, pushing her away but my head kept going down, lowering, my mouth on hers again. I heard a crack of the wood again and I knew this had to end, now when I was still conscious of what I was doing and what was happening and what I had to do. I felt like I was taking away a piece of me as I pushed her away and looked down at her, memorizing her face.

"I'll miss you."

"No Sasuke-"

I let go of her and transported behind her. She looked around wildly, searching for me. I clenched my hand tightly, wishing there was another way to do this. I placed my chin on her shoulders, her hair –which looked more orange than pink with the fire- tickling my face, I felt her shiver.

"I'm sorry Sakura." I told her.

"Sasuk-"

I couldn't stay quiet; I couldn't afford having her away without her knowing this. The worst part was that I would probably never hear her response.

"I love you."

I heard her gasp while I straightened up and pulled my arm back, my eyes closing as if in pain, I could feel the pain in my neck, the one she would feel, even before I had placed it on her, and threw it, my fist cruelly connecting with her neck. She instantly went limp and I caught her, carrying her in my arms. I looked down at her face and felt self-hatred inside me.
"SUIGETSU! KARIN! JUUGO!" I yelled and ran to open the door; the smoke was already bothering, getting in the way to my lungs now that I needed more air to keep myself together. I opened the door, coughing and saw a tall figure above me.

"Going so soon, Sasuke-kun." I heard that bastard say in his disgusting voice. I kept on coughing and glared at him.

"Get out of the way!" I yelled at him, putting as much acid in each single word as possible, hoping it could somehow burn him alive; I would laugh out loud as he yelled in scorching pain… I needed a way to get reed of some feeling and this helped. "Why? I'm very comfortable here. Besides, maybe this is my chance to get my dear Sakura with her being unconscious and all." He said, staring down at my doing on her with a smirk.

I tsked. "Why do you want her?! Just leave her alone, and stop calling her "my dear Sakura", she is not yours." I yelled, my eyes going red.

"Oh, scary eyes. I might remind you that she's not yours either. I want her because you do, it's a little grudge I have against you for betraying me, and it's too bad she's going to have to be the one paying it, isn't Sasuke?"

I gaped and glared at him, wishing I could kill him with my eyes when I remember I could. I willed my eye to change to Mangekyo Sharingan and threw Amaterasu on him but missed. I might have tried again and again until I hit him, but that would drain me of energy, and she didn't have my time. "You won't touch her; I won't let you hurt her!" I said, my eye going back to normal.

"Who said I was going to ask for your permission?" He responded and smiled. He was about to walk forward when a voice came from behind him.

"Leave my nephew and the girl alone, Orochimaru."

We both fixed our eyes on the source of the voice, it was Madara.

"You're here because of me, so leave them."

"Oh, all right, they'll just have to wait till I finish with you." Orochimaru said and lunged forward. I walked the steps, coughing hard. They had already started fighting.

"I won't let you hurt Sasuke, Orochimaru. Nor Sakura just because of your disgusting grudges." I heard Madara say.

"Since when are you so protective, Madara? Just a while ago you wouldn't care less."

"Because I just realized I could have a family again!"

I stared at him, my eyes widely open. Was he serious? I remembered when I'd asked him to leave this, he had said he wouldn't, but he had never answered the family part. What made him change?

"Sasuke, get her out of here now. Get away and never come back." He yelled at me. I couldn't move, shock of having him act like family, like my uncle. It was baffling.

"Go!"

I shook my head and ran for it; I kept on hearing the other two yelling and fighting. But I knew I couldn't go back, I needed to get Sakura away. She was also coughing now; apparently the smoke had started affecting her as well. I looked worriedly down at her and bolted forward even faster, my chakra flames leaving burn marks where they licked the trees. The whole way I kept on thinking about Madara, -actually it was more a distraction so I wouldn't start feeling down again. How come he had acted like that? Was it just that? Acting? But that didn't explained why. That night when I'd talk to him about that, he had stayed very quiet when I had told him I didn't see him as my uncle or family. Maybe he did see me as family, the only one he had left. I looked behind me where he was. I'll let him know that I saw him as my uncle after all when I see him again.

When I finally arrived at the Village, it was dawn. The sky was a scale of colors, going from navy blue all the way to light golden. The Village was almost completely recovered now, not the way it had been some months ago when I came here. I walked the still familiar path and saw the benches along it. This was where I had left her that day 3 years ago. I had done exactly the same thing I had now. I knew it was a little too theatrical, but I didn't care. I walked to the bench and set her down gently, she was sleeping peacefully, except for the coughing fits that overwhelmed her every now and then. I had to go, I couldn't risk someone seeing me or more importantly, I couldn't afford her waking up. I was about to turn when I remembered she had her Akatsuki uniform on. Fortunately, only the jacket had the clouds pattern. I unzipped her jacket and placed it aside. The morning was chilly, so I took off mine, which was plain white, and put it on her, laying her back down again. I stood up and stared down at her. I knew I had to leave. I knew I couldn't see her again, ever. But it was too painful, unbearable. It was like not living with a vital organ, or not consuming a vital substance. I could get used to it, but the pain and need for it would always be there, unendurable.

However, I couldn't do anything about it. I could easily let her know where to see me again, but she'd run the risk of getting caught. And I was poison to the Village. I couldn't risk poisoning her as well, more than I already had. I kept staring at her when an idea came to me. I fumbled through my pockets and found a crumbled piece of paper; I extended it the best I could. I remembered a little trick I had learned while learning how to control fire techniques, I could let out a thin fire flame, not hot enough to actually burn the paper and I could use that to write the note. I hurried up, writing as fast as I could, and when finished, I folded it and placed it on my jacket's pocket. I looked at her for the last time, leaned down and gave her a kiss; finally I ran away without turning back, not even once. Because I knew that that would be enough to make me regret it all. I would regret the note, bringing her, but most important: I would regret leaving her.

Sometime late, I was in the forest. I didn't run, I couldn't find the strength inside me to run. I felt empty, but there was this anger inside me, anger against the world, that was slowly taking over the numbness of emptiness. Every step I took away from the Village Hidden in the Leaf felt like more weigh added to my martyrdom.

I ended up arriving to the hideout until 7a.m. Even from a distance I could spot smoke in the air and an almost disintegrated dust cloud. But it was all very quiet. Things were probably over now.

When I was in front of the hideout, I barely recognized it –which was amazingly baffling since most of it was underground. The steps that went down on the west entrance were black, warning that any pressure on them would turn them to ashes. I walked around to the origin of the smoke and found the others in a loose circle, staring at a figure on the floor. At the sound of my footsteps they turned to look at me, the three with an expression of loss and understanding for me. The first thing that made me understand what was going on was that Madara wasn't with them, staring down at the figure which I had thought –had hoped- was Orochimaru. I stopped cold where I was before my eyes incredulously traced the dead figure on the floor. I felt as if they were going to pop out of their sockets. Madara was laying, above a pool of blood on the ground, dead. For a moment the entire world seemed to tilt sideways for my eyes, smoke covering everything, and then I shook my head, trying to get a grip of myself.

"What happened? How was it possible that he killed him?" I asked in an angry voice, though I was afraid that it kind of sounded like I was choking.

"It was…astonishing. The way Orochimaru suddenly reacted…" Karin said, her eyes trying to focus, her mind seeing the battle again. I turned to Juugo.

"Madara was almost done with him, probably just a blow away and suddenly…"

"He made a strange jutsu, I've never seen anything like that."Continued Suigetsu. "He combined all the elements making continued attacks. Madara didn't have the chance to escape, let alone transport somewhere else. Sorry for not getting in Sasuke, maybe if we had-"

"No…I'm glad you didn't." I said absently.

I stared down at my uncle. He had sacrificed himself, he had helped me escape with Sakura, and he had protected us. And now he was dead. I felt my knees fail, and then the soil and rock sinking painfully in the skin of my knees and later the one in the palms of my hands. I saw from the corner of my eye how the three of them gave a step forward, their hands extended in front of them to help me.

I lifted one of my hands and hold it out at them, motioning then to stop.

"Just, give me a moment." I said, my eyes on the ground. I needed to find a way into my old self; I needed my usual coldness and calm to rule my mind. I searched my mind for it, and when I was sure I had it, I sighed and stood up, supporting on my knees. I walked to where Madara was and knelt beside him. His eye was still open and when I looked into it, darkness clouded my vision and I could now only see with my mind.

I somehow saw a replay of the battle, I was there, but things went through me, as if I was made of steam, a ghost. I saw the moment when Orochimaru killed Madara, screaming "Uncle!" for what seemed the first and last time. Somehow in Madara's eye, I could see he was happy, or smiling. Then, a cloud blurred my vision and I was now standing alone with Madara in the same clearing, the pool of blood still staining the ground eerily but he seemed unscratched.

"Hey Sasuke." He said.

"Wha-What's-"

"I left this message for you the moment I knew I would die. I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?! I'm the one who should do that! I was very unfair with you, and after what you did-"

"It was the least I could do for you. And you don't need to say sorry; I wasn't fair with you either."

I stared at him with sadness. "I need you to know that after all I did learn to think of you as my uncle."

"I'm glad to hear that. To tell you the truth, I didn't consider you my nephew at the beginning."

"How sweet." I muttered sarcastically.

"Whatever, this is getting mawkish and awkward, so, I'll get to the point. First of all, I'm sorry I couldn't kill Orochimaru. He'll probably go for Sakura now."

I snorted. "Like I'd allow that."

"Don't underestimate him." he warned reflexively, and I smiled, because this somehow reminded me of Mother when she'd scold me. "Anyway, I already sent a message to the rest of the members of Akatsuki, I told them to abandon this mess. I'll follow your advice and leave the world alone, Sasuke."

"Too bad you won't be following the other part of my advice." I said sympathetically.

His eyes smiled. "I did that too, I made you see me as family." And added more bitterly. "That ought to mean something."

I laughed.

"Ok, so when you see Zetsu, he'll explain what to do now, he's the second in command now. Oh, and I might add that I left you like the leader, in case Akatsuki continued together."

"Great, the business will stay in the family."

He chuckled.

"Well, I guess that's all. Goodby-"

"Wait! Aren't you gonna tell me a way to defeat Orochimaru, a secret jutsu of the family, something?"

"If I had known that I would've killed him myself. You've read too many books. You'll know that to do."

"Typical." I muttered.

"Farewell then." He said, the cloud around me thickened, erasing any visibility again before I came back to my senses.

Madara's eye was now closed and I could hear the others calling my name in worried voices. I stood up and stared down at him. Farewell to you too, uncle.

After we gave him a proper burial we found ourselves at the front of the now buried hideout, staring at it.

"What now?" Asked Suigetsu, the others eyes looking at me with the same question on them.

I felt myself sinking into waves of depression again, like mud, and I was just glad they hadn't asked about her.

I sighed, visualizing black aura coming out from my mouth, I'd heard that worked. But it didn't to me, so I guess it was just a myth. "We need to settle down somewhere else. We also need to talk with the other guys of Akatsuki as soon as possible. Madara send them a last message, but there are still some things we have to establish."

"Ok then, but where are we staying now?" Juugo asked, his expression thoughtful. "Well… there is one like 5 miles away, it's the closest one around here, perha-"

"No." I said. "We are going to stay in the one in the south, 8 miles away."

"But Sasuke, why? That's the closest one to th-"

"All right then." Suigetsu interrupted Karin when he saw a shadow cross my face. Of course I knew it was the closest to there, I didn't need to be reminded, I was well aware of it. Karin gave him a dark glare adding an "Hmph!" at the end, but she smiled sympathetically and apologetically at me when she caught my eyes.

"I guess we should go now then." Juugo hinted me. I sighed and looked down for a moment. I had to get past this wall now or otherwise I won't be able to accomplish anything.

I lifted my head, the mask on my face at full power." All right, let's go."

We started running, I could feel the others' thoughts on me and my attitude, but I wasn't paying close attention to that. I was very busy looking back at the remaining of the hideout, somewhat glad that we weren't staying there anymore. I would rather remember than half-live memories again.

Yeah, yeah, Madara turned out to be good after all -' sorry if it's strange, but I just couldn't leave him like the bad guy, I have a problem with leaving bad guys ._. sorry but I hope you like it and that you dont kill me for doing that XDD bye! plz review!:D 3