Dedicated to: All the fans who waited far too long for an update ;)

Chapter 38

Life

Despite everything all I could think of as I ran through the forest was Renee…

Jacob's voice replayed over in my mind with each graceful leap that my human body alone would have tripped over itself long ago. All I could see was Jacob's smiling face in light of the dawn, the fervor shining from his eyes with a love unlike anything I have or will know. And I wondered how I would be able to say the words he had given me an hour before, when his deep warm voice soothed my nerves through the receiver of my cell.

I wondered how I could walk through the Cullen's doorway where only ghosts would inevitably greet me. And I wondered what Renee would have thought about me, Edward, Charlie and Sue, the truth I had never spoken aloud yet she, like Charlie, suspected.

The afternoon sun was warm on my back, keeping back the chill of the rain cascading around me. I could almost see the sleek lines of the home Esme had fashioned peeking through the trees. And in my mind, I saw my mother's face. For the first time in years, I thought of the human life I had been so willing to give up. Never again would I feel my mother's arms wrap around me, see her hazel eyes scrunch up mischievously, listen to her outrageous antics or feel her fingers run through my hair…

I felt a chill race up my spine with a sudden gust of wind nearby. For a moment, I caught a glimpse of wet golden hair and heart wrenching honey eyes before it disappeared into the trees. And then I was at their doorstep once more.

Emmett opened the door before my hand settled on the familiar knob and the next thing I knew, his arms were crushing me against his chest. "Hey little sis! What the hell are you doing out in this rain!"

Esme came up behind him with fresh towels and a soft sad smile. "Emmett, no swearing in front of ladies."

Emmett visibly cowed and ruffled his short cropped curly hair as he set me back on the floor and winked. "Sorry mom."

Esme wrapped the towels round me and said, "But he's right. Dear you shouldn't have been running outside in the rain like that. We can't have you getting a cold."

I smiled as my Vampire mother and brother ushered me up the steps. The dead weight that had filled the house brightened with their chatter. I had missed being the only "human" in the house after all.

After forcing me to change into an old set of Esme's clothes, the two Cullens set about quickly to business.

"What do you want for dinner Bella?" Esme's sweet voice crooned from the kitchen.

I shrugged, shoving my hands into the jeans pockets. "Doesn't matter."

"How does Italiano sound?"

I grinned at the mention of their favorite food to cook and replied, "Sounds great."

"Bella! Come 'ere! You have to check out the new system!" Emmett dragged me to his special place in front of the large flat screen and brand new game console set before it like a shrine. I listened as my brother went over all the new features this yet to be released system had as opposed to the last one.

And I let him shove the second controller in my hand. We lead human soldiers into combat that seemed like preschool compared to Vampire wars. But it made the light return to Emmett's eyes and made Esme hum as she cooked over the gas stove.

Carlisle came home soon after. I listened to he and Esme's hushed tones in the kitchen.

"How did it go, dear?"

"Sigh… The newspapers are saying Alice and Edward were in a car wreck and only close family attended the funeral. It's just as well. I don't know if I could have handled anything more public…"

"I found arrangements in Vermont today."

Silence followed, only interrupted by the gunfire and explosions from the screen…

Carlisle sounded weary. "Our old home…it has been nearly eighty years since we lived there last. And it was before Jasper and…it will be a good change. Have you told the children?"

"No."

I turned my head to the kitchen and faintly registered Emmett's agonizing howl beside me before his hands were round my waist tickling me mercilessly. "Damn Bella! How could you just let 'em slice you up like that baby?"

"Emmett!" Esme's tone was harsh and we both froze.

Carlisle retreated into his study and I murmured apologies at Emmett before telling him I needed to run upstairs.

I glanced towards Edward's room, hesitated before what had formerly been Jasper's and Alice's…

Rose and Emmett's room wasn't a place I had come to the last time the Cullens lived here, when I had just been Edward's human girlfriend. It felt strange to hover just in the open doorway, and I was unprepared for the sight I found upon entering.

A rocking chair had been placed amid the voluptuous furnishings of Rose and Em's bedroom. Next to it sat a tiny bassinet and nearby, an antique wooden chest with an elegantly scripted "R" on its lid. And in the rocking chair, the beautiful angel I had met years before and not understood, held the tiny babe in her arms. A delicate, pink and white blanket was wrapped snugly round the sleeping infant and she breathed deeply and evenly in the arms of the only mother she had known.

My heart broke.

Rose's eyes lifted to mine then, startled by my entrance, fear and acceptance all mixed in golden topaz. "Bella." Her full lips vainly searched for a smile.

I sat on the floor beside her, glanced at the large wooden chest and wondered how to say the words that were on my heart. "Rose…" I began.

Her gasp was barely audible, only to ears of her own kind. I met her eyes again and smiled.

"Jacob has been talking with the Council and the Pack today about Adeline. You see, no one knew about Anna, not even Embry's own family outside the Pack. In the end they left the decision to Jacob because he was Embry's best friend and he's their Chief…"

"It's okay Bella," Rose interrupted me then, unparalleled sorrow blurring her perfect angelic features. She moved an arm from Lina to touch the chest between us. "I—I knew I had no hope of keeping her. I know what she is, and I know the Volturi would kill her in an instant if they learned the truth."

Her eyes ignited with a terrifying fire. "I want Lina to be safe…" The fire softened as she looked at the baby. "I only wanted a family when I was human…a husband who loved me and children." She choked on tears that could not be shed, patted the chest. "Look inside Bella. I'm sorry I never shared this with you before…I've carted this everywhere the last eighty years since I stole it from my mother's house."

I blinked back tears. Inside there were turn-of-the-century magazine clippings and notes pasted all inside the lid. Two sections were filled with baby clothes and shoes and hats—a hope chest. Rosalie, the sister Edward had always told me was only ever filled with shallow and vain thoughtlessness…

"She's so perfect Bella. I—I feel like she really is mine. I don't know how…" Rose breathed deeply. "I want her to be safe. Promise me you'll watch over her Bella." Her eyes locked mine, hand reaching out to grasp painfully onto my own.

I smiled. "Rose,"

"Just promise me!"

"Rose!" Her grip loosened and I smiled. "You silly ass, can't you let me finish for once? I'm trying to tell you Jacob decided the safest place for Lina is with you!"

I didn't see her place Lina in the bassinet before she tackled me with the fiercest of hugs. She pulled away, smiling and embarrassed. Her laughter surprised me as much as her sobs. She pressed the back of her hand to her mouth as we stood together and turned to watch the still sleeping Adeline.

Rose shook her head, nervous laughter dying as she glanced up at me again. "I think I could kiss that wet dog for this."

My face twisted before I could stop and Rose grinned, suddenly composed and looking more like her old self save the glow to her eyes.

"Maybe I should leave that to you wolf girl."

Jasper found me outside just as a smiling Emmett, with his arm around Rose and their new baby, said goodbye.

I was crushed into his embrace, startled when he would not let me go. "Jasper?" I managed to whisper.

His grip loosened, a weary grin lining his haggard features as he stepped back. He kept his hands on my forearms. "Bella, I'm sorry for startling you…" He frowned and his hands fell to his side. He stumbled back slightly in the rain.

My hands took his again. I squeezed until he met my eye again. "Jazz…what is it?"

"I couldn't bear to look through her things, not until last night… Then I found this."

He pulled a thin piece of paper from the inside of his jacket and placed it in my hands. My name was written in her fluid, nervous scratch and I tucked it inside my own jacket pocket quickly before the rain soaked the precious letter through.

"There was one for me too—I, I didn't want to believe her when she started having the visions about her death. I was the one who decided we needed to stay back with you to try and lure the Eldest away. She didn't say anything to me then but that last night we loved—we loved a lifetimes worth."

My eyes fell to the ground, uncomfortable and pained thinking of the loss Jasper felt most of all. And the truth that I had never really forgiven Alice for what she had done years ago. Could I have changed any of it, if I had?

Jasper's arms were round me once again. "It's not your fault Bella, any more than it is mine. I need you to know that. And I hope you come with us wherever it is we go."

I looked up into his haunted golden eyes. "Are you staying with them, then?"

He nodded, smiled a smile I had seen him use only for Alice. "She threatened me if I didn't stay, but then didn't tell me why."

I grinned. "Sounds like Alice."

Jasper nodded, pulled away and glanced toward the lit home behind us. "Nothing will ever be the same for me. She was my reason, Bella, but not my life…"

"I'll see you soon Jazz."

Our eyes met and with a slight frown he replied, "Soon."

As I ran towards home I smiled as I thought of Renee, the mother I would never again know but in a way would live forever through me.

I thought of Anna, who had given her life for Adeline as Renee gave her life for mine.

And of Rosalie, her hatred for this cursed life turned into blessing when the dawn gave her a second chance to be a mother. For all the bitterness and malice had fallen away to reveal the inner beauty she had possessed all long.

And marveled that somehow, despite all of the pain and heartache and loss, even now life and beauty and love still managed to abound.

I had almost entered the clearing when he found me, and realized too late that my phone must have died over an hour ago.

Jacob's t-shirt and shorts were soaked through with the freezing rain. His smile shone through the twilight surrounding us.

I gasped as he lifted me from the earth with ease and clutched tightly, pressed till no space was left between us, his breath sweet and warm against my face.

His nose grazed my jaw, lips on my neck just over the sensitive teeth marked scar and then his forehead was pressed to mine. His racing heart calmed as he breathed, "You reek of leeches."

I planted my fist into his shoulder, frowned as his grin lit his face. His dark eyes flickered to meet mine as I said, "Not funny."

"How they take the news?"

I grinned remembering Rosalie's words and pressed my lips to his. A jolt of energy passed through my limbs and back. Jacob held me even tighter. I had to press my hands hard on his shoulders to break away for my sake as much as his. Our breath was heavy on the air, rain mixing with the sweet taste of his lips even now.

"That good huh?" He wagged his brows.

I laughed, savored in the heat that burned through the fabric of his tee shirt. "I think Rose won't be calling you a dog anymore."

"Why not? She's right you know…" He grabbed my ass so I was forced to wrap my legs round his waist. I gasped when he ground against me, so the breath was stolen from my lips. And then his lips were over mine. Slowly, he walked us into my backyard. He kept one hand steady on my hips and moved the other to tangle in my long chestnut hair. He planted me firmly upon the seat of his bike, only to press himself against my spread legs more firmly.

I pushed him away, struggled to kick him back with a grin. "Is that any way to treat a lady?"

Jake's grin was tainted by the lust thick in his obsidian gold flecked eyes. In my struggle I increased the friction between my jeans and his and felt the hardening bulge grow to meet me and press against my core through the rough fabric. "Hell yes."

I moaned when his lips found mine again. The rain faded to a light mist.

Lights from the police cruiser turning towards the drive made me pushed Jacob back frantically. In Charlie Swan's eyes I was still his baby girl, and if I wanted Jake's head to stay on his shoulders and spend the night with him without Charlie fearing for his future grandchildren, I needed to keep the P.D.A, PG.

Jake growled as I pulled away and glanced down to find the bulge in his pants strained and obvious. I twisted round in my seat quickly so that now me and Jake's bike hid what would have been an even more embarrassing situation.

I smiled as Charlie parked in the grass to let Jake have room to pull out, and stepped from the cruiser to meet us. "Hey kids." After sending a slight wave and warm grin for me, he cast Jake a suspicious glance. "So, ah, you kids have any plans tonight? I'm about to head out to La Push."

Jacob's voice was strained to my ears and surprisingly calm for Charlie's. "Sure, sure, I came to pick Bella up."

Charlie nodded as he stepped closer to the door, eyeing us over again. "Right…maybe you should get out of those wet clothes before heading over. Rain's still chilly." With another quick smile and nod he entered the house.

Jacob and I burst out laughing the moment the door shut.

His hands twisted my legs round so they were wrapped on either side of his waist again, the friction against my core nearly unbearable as his laughter died. "I think I like Charlie's plan. We don't need to get there too early ya know."

My eyes widened. "With Charlie in the house?!"

We blinked as Charlie came back out again, police jacket changed out for his navy parka, keys in hand and a tell tale grin etching its way into his face as he passed us by. "See you kids later. Be careful on that bike Bells."

Our eyes met. I smiled shyly.

Before Jacob could reach for me again I slipped from his grasp and darted quickly to the front door. Charlie's cruiser lights faded down the street and Jacob growled as he pounded after me. "Bella!"

I shouted as I heard him slam the door, raced towards the kitchen in the dark and waited for him to follow, only to slip just beyond his fingertips again as I pushed the door back on his face.

"OWW!" he yelled.

I reached the head of the stairs in a blur.

"Bella!" Jacob was laughing as he tore behind me.

I shrieked with delight as I shut and locked my bedroom door and began to search my closet for dry clothes. I shivered as I heard his fist pound on the hollow wood.

"You better open this door before I do something you'll regret! You have till the count of five Swan!"

"No!" I bit my lip as I managed to grab another pair of low ride jeans and plaid shirt. I yelped when the door burst open, panel cracking and wood creaking on its hinges as it slammed against the opposite wall. The wolf picture, framed on my wall, rattled in its glass as my very horny, very wet and very handsome werewolf stepped into the fading light seeping through my window.

Holding up my dry clothes like a shield, I stepped back as he stalked confidently forward, eyes raking my wet form hungrily.

"No, Jake! I have to change and then we need to go or you know we'll never make it tonight."

His white teeth flashed as he came closer. My back was against the window now. His grin widened and then he turned and flopped back on my unmade bed with a casual sigh.

"Jake! You're getting my sheets wet!"

He shrugged, arms crossing behind his head. "You said you had to change so I thought I'd wait. What's the matter Bells? Hope my being here doesn't bother you."

I glared at him, hands tightening on the material before throwing the clothes down beside my closed window and stepping to the foot of the bed. My fingers grasped the wet ends of my long sleeved shirt, peeled the fabric away as though it were a second skin and I let it fall carelessly to the floor. Jacob's grin faded, eyes dark, unreadable. Steeling my resolve, I let my hands grace the black lace of my bra, down the flat hardened plane of my stomach and slowly to undo the button of Esme's jeans. My hair covered my torso as I lowered to pull the wet fabric down. When I stood up, my eyes locked to the jean shorts barely containing his desire. His breath came in shallow gasps his hands lowered towards his jeans as I recognized the animal growing inside of him as he began to lightly rub himself.

I twisted my arms back to unclasp my bra and then he was undone. With a low groan that set fire deep inside of me Jacob stood and pulled his t-shirt away with little hindrance, revealing smooth muscled pectorals, arms, abdomen and tapered waist. One arm swept me up against him with ease and his mouth stole mine, tongue grazing my lips for entrance.

Fabric of my lace underwear grew wet as Jacobs hands brought my hips to grind hard against his and we both moaned as I realized how long it had been since I felt him inside of me, how loving Jacob was necessary to me as breathing.

Despite the intensity of his kisses, of the rhythm he had set before, Jacob laid me gently back upon my already damp bed sheets. Love shone through his eyes before he hovered over me.

I shivered against the cold my half dead body contained as he left a trail of hot kisses from my covered breasts and down my abdomen. I gasped as he spread my thighs and, keeping my legs still, lightly grazed his teeth and lips higher over my skin, his eyes never leaving mine. Resting back on his knees, his fingers pulled my underwear past my hips, caressed my legs as he removed first one foot and then the other.

And then his mouth was suddenly over my wet entrance, tongue tasting and licking. I moaned as his tongue moved against me and then his fingers were rubbing circles, tighter and faster, sliding inside. I writhed beneath him, grasped at him and growled when I caught sight of the wicked grin on his face.

Not fair.

With a strength that surprised him and me, I sat up against him and grasped desperately at the button to his shorts. Jacob groaned as my fingers brushed his hardness through the fabric of his jeans. And then he was helping me push them down to his knees, standing at the side of the bed to kick them off. His eyes grew wide when my hands grasped his ass and pulled him to me.

"Bella…" He breathed and moaned as my hand strayed to trace the hard line of his abdomen and down the thick muscle of his groin. Brushing against his length I kissed his hipbone instead, I felt him jerk as I ran my tongue down his length. I took him into my mouth as deeply as I could and sucked.

"Shit!" Jake hissed as he leaned into me and bucked. I took him further into my mouth, barely grazing my teeth against the soft flesh. Pressure made each movement pain and pleasure beyond anything I would compare for eternity.

And then his hands were about my waist, lifting me into the air as he shook, fighting for control as he brought the head of his cock to rub my entrance, shooting fire through my body.

Outside I could feel the moon filling. My vision flashed silver and the Werewolf blood in my heart surged as the animal filled me with fresh energy. I sat, pushed against him and grazed against his cock without allowing entrance. Jacob growled and threw me back upon the bed. He held my wrists down on either side of our bodies and then thrust deeply into me.

Our eyes locked, softened and filled with relief, passion and need.

He set the rhythm, lifted my ankle to his neck and we both hissed at the new angle. I cried out as I flowed round him. Jacob shuddered and a deep groan escaped his perfect lips as he quickly followed, thrusting deeper into me.

Our lips locked fiercely together. It was a dance we would do for eternity, for always and for a moment.

Silver and gold lights burst behind my closed lids, renewed energy filled both of us as we traced one another with kisses.

Life…

Disclaimer: S.M inc. lol Yeah she owns it, can she just sell the rights to Jacob's story?