Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended. Thanks as always go to my betas, U2Shay and Adt216, for their beta skills and to kejce for pre reading. U2Shay, thank you for talking me through all of the changes on this one.
A Road Less Traveled
Edward helped Jasper heave his duffel out of his trunk then shut it with a quick pull. Late afternoon was turning into twilight and the cooling air had set Jasper's teeth chattering. The wind suddenly picked up and a strong gust blew a length of Jasper's hair across his forehead. He pushed it away only to have it flop back against his skin. Realizing the effort was futile, Jasper stuffed his hands into his pockets and hunched his shoulders against the cold. The action brought a stab of pain up and down his arm reminding him that not everything had returned to the way it once was when he'd stepped back onto US soil.
For Jasper, being home could not take away the memories of the path that had brought him here. A tremor ran down his spine as he'd remembered the exhaustion and hunger of being lost in the German forest. The feeling of desperation was still there, just beneath his skin. He had barely made it out alive and that had been in the lush of summer. Fear prickled through him as he considered trying to find a way out in the dead of winter. It didn't take him long to realize that the outcome would have been much different. Another chill ran down Jasper's spine.
"Are you okay?" Edward called hefting one bag on his shoulder and grabbing a second in his hands.
Jasper turned toward his friend only to see the image of Vladimir's stunned eyes the moment after Demetri shot him.
"Jasper?" Edward called again.
Jasper shook the image from his mind. He was relieved to see the image didn't last long but it unnerved him, making him want to look around for ghosts in the shadows of the oncoming night.
"I'm fine," Jasper replied somewhat shakily. His voice couldn't seem to hold the conviction his mind was hoping he'd find.
Edward placed a gentle hand on Jasper's shoulder. Even the light touch made Jasper flinch against the pain.
"Sorry," Edward called out and instantly moved his hand away. He'd intended to be a comfort to Jasper, not cause him more pain.
"It's all right. It just smarts a little."
Jasper wasn't being forthright, but he didn't want to call further attention to what he perceived to be a weakness.
"Listen," Edward began. "I just wanted you to know that whatever Charlie says in there, deep down he's glad as hell that you're back."
"So he's Charlie to you too?" Jasper asked in disbelief.
Edward shrugged. "He's my father in law."
Though the realization had hit him earlier in the day, it was still hard for Jasper to comprehend the connection between his former commander Bella and now Edward. Jasper wasn't sure what would be worse, the third degree he received from Frank Brandon, Esquire or the marching orders Edward had undoubtedly received from Colonel Swan.
"Jasper," Edward began quietly, struggling with how to say what was on his mind. "I did the best I could for Alice while you were away. I know it wasn't enough." He sighed pushing his fingers through his wind blown hair. "But I did my best to keep my promise and take care of her. I just want to say—" Edward looked down as his voice cracked. "I don't think anything could make me happier right now than seeing you alive."
"I know you did, and I'm grateful for it, Edward."
A small piece of Jasper's old self leapt to the surface and he grinned at Edward as he made his witty reply.
"I once asked you if Bella had a twin or a cousin." Edward looked up and nodded remembering the conversation Jasper described. "Thank God Alice isn't a blood relative. I'd have a shit storm of a time asking the meanest SOB in ETOUSA for Alice's hand."
Edward laughed. "Guess that's why I never asked."
Both men laughed, breaking the heavy weight of moments earlier, and strode up the steps of the two story colonial. Charlie was in his front parlor, standing in front of a liquor cabinet. In the time it took Edward and Jasper to grab their bags and mount the steps, Charlie had three tumblers on the top of the cabinet and was filling each with a healthy ration of his best single malt scotch.
"Sit down," Charlie ordered without turning from his post at the liquor cabinet.
Edward and Jasper dropped their bags and followed the sound of Charlie's voice into the room. It was sparsely decorated save for the liquor cabinet, a worn leather chair and a small round table that looked oddly out of place with the other surroundings. Charlie brought the bottle of scotch and the glasses to the table then abruptly left the men standing in the room.
Jasper glanced over to Edward with a confused look on his face.
"Don't ask me," Edward replied as he took his seat across from Jasper's. "We never come in this room."
Moments later Charlie returned with a wooden folding chair which he set between the other two. He sat down, lifted his tumbler, clinked both Edward and Jasper's glasses, then proceeded to drain half of the amber liquid from his glass. Jasper thought he heard the colonel mumble something like, thank you, Ree-nie, before downing the second half of his drink.
Charlie looked up from his glass into the wide eyes of the men before him. The scotch burned as it made its way down; it was a welcome feeling after months if not years of cold. For seated at his beloved table was Jasper Whitlock, who for all intents and purposes was a walking miracle.
"I was a soda jerk as a kid," Charlie began unseating the silence and startling the men before him. "I was seventeen and working at a Walgreens when the prettiest girl I'd ever seen came walking through the front door. She was new in town. Her family had just moved into Galesburg a few weeks prior." A slow smile lit Charlie's weathered cheeks. "Renee had me the moment she smiled," Charlie added with a grin. "I proposed to her nearly a year later at this very table," he added rubbing a flat palm over the wood like someone who'd wiped it down thousands of times before. It took me two months to convince old man Crawford to let me have this table, but he finally gave in and I gave it to Renee for our first wedding anniversary. She died when Bella was seven and I swore I'd never sit here without her again."
Jasper spied Edward across the table's wooden top wondering what had changed Charlie's mind. Edward looked just as bewildered.
"Don't ask," Charlie began. "Just know that you're the first to sit at this table in a long, long time. Lift your glasses boys," Charlie said adding more amber liquid to each glass. "To the ones worth coming home to."
That was an easy drink to swallow, for both Edward and Jasper knew the power of having someone worth fighting for. With a light thud, Charlie brought his glass back down to the table. He brought his elbows up and leaned heavily on them, staring right into Jasper's eyes.
"Now, tell me what the hell happened. I don't want the pansy ass version you gave the Brandons this afternoon, either. I want the whole story, and don't feed me any of that cock and bull about shit being classified. You owe me the full briefing after the hell you put all of us through, not to mention what this did to Bella and Alice. Start talking."
Truthfully, Jasper wouldn't have had the guts to withholding information from the colonel. Active duty or not, he knew the power this man could wield. He'd seen it firsthand. So Jasper told his story. He began with the delay outside of Magdeburg and ended with the frustrating conversation he'd had with Master Sergeant Gray. Edward became paler the longer Jasper spoke. The description of Stephan's madness and the murder of the Pathfinders made him sick. Charlie, on the other hand, became eerily calm. The only visible reaction to Jasper's words was the occasional squint of his eye.
"The Master Sergeant got Demetri to London before I left, but I don't know if he'll be allowed to defect. He said there were no guarantees."
Tired from the weight of another confession, Jasper rubbed his forehead and closed his eyes for a moment hoping he'd have better luck sleeping tonight. He doubted it since the arms he wanted wrapped around him were two miles down the road.
"He won't let it go," Charlie said in a gruff voice, startling Jasper out of his trance.
Jasper opened his eyes to see the colonel sitting back in his chair, arms crossed over his chest. His eye was twitching again, as if a small band of strategists were coddled together formulating a plan behind his mind's eye.
"Gray may not have solid proof, but he won't sit on his ass either. I don't know if he'll be able to find this Stephan, but I can promise he'll do his damn best to get justice for the Pathfinders."
"But—" Jasper began.
"Don't ask how. Just know he believes you. If he didn't your Russian friend would be in the Gulags by now."
Jasper nodded. The colonel was undoubtedly right. Without Gray's influence, Demetri would be back with the Russians, classified as a traitor. He'd be marching toward his imprisonment or death. Jasper just hoped that the tenacity Colonel Swan described of Gray would ultimately land Demetri on this side of the pond.
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Again Jasper didn't sleep well. He was caught up between the time difference and the restlessness of his mind. He tossed and turned, floating between nightmares as he slept and the pain in his shoulder when he lay awake. Although he'd only been with her for a day, he sorely missed Alice. By the time five am rolled around Jasper cleaned himself up and made his way downstairs. He wasn't sure if anyone would be up yet, but at least if he was dressed and ready, he'd be one step closer to being reunited with Alice.
By the time Jasper hit the bottom step and turned the corner, he could tell he wasn't the only one awake. The scent of freshly brewed coffee wafted around his head, beckoning him toward the kitchen like a moth to a flame.
"Coffee?" Colonel Swan grunted from behind his cup.
"Yes, please, sir."
Jasper watched as the colonel tilted his head in the direction of a pot on the stove. Jasper didn't bother to ask for cream or sugar, like most soldiers, he took it both black and strong.
"You're up early," Jasper heard the colonel remark from behind yesterday's Baltimore Sun.
"It's not really early in London, sir."
A sound very much like a snort was the only response Jasper heard. He sat at the table across from the colonel. Silence stretched and Jasper kicked himself for not waking Edward before coming downstairs. A minute later Jasper heard the crumple of the colonel's newspaper and saw his weathered face emerge from behind it.
"The time change isn't what's keeping you awake."
The colonel's statement was so matter of fact that Jasper hardly imagined refuting it. The tone of his voice was confident, experienced and perhaps even a little resigned. All Jasper could do was shake his head no in response.
"They don't leave you," the colonel began with a quiet voice. "The ghosts are always there, but their call grows quieter as time passes."
Again the silence stretched between the two men.
"What are you searching for, Whitlock?"
Jasper looked up, his blue eyes were searching for a suitable answer. Within that stare Charlie saw a familiar pain.
"Peace," Jasper finally replied.
There were plenty of ways to take that response. Peace in the world was one, but what Jasper was searching for was peace within himself. He was looking for a way to make peace with the ghosts and quiet his mind to the war he'd left behind.
The colonel seemed to stifle a laugh, though he wasn't laughing at Jasper. Charlie had his own ghosts and plenty of them.
"When you figure that one out, let me know. In the meantime, you need to find a way to get it out. If you don't, it will eat you alive."
Get it out? Jasper thought condescendingly. Get out the fear, the sadness, the anger? He didn't know how.
Charlie watched Jasper puzzle over his words. Jasper's elbows were on the table, with one palm closed over the other fist. A shiny gold band glinted on the third finger of Jasper's left hand. Charlie lifted his newspaper back into position and offered one final bit of advice from behind the newsprint.
"That girl of yours is stronger than you think."
"I know, sir, and I'm damn lucky she is."
Charlie grunted from behind the sports section and reached out for his cooling cup of coffee. After a healthy gulp he set it down back on the table. His fingers drifted over the smooth surface and his thoughts turned to Bella's mother. He'd been damn lucky once too. He only hoped Jasper would heed his advice.
"Treat her right, Whitlock."
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Alice bounded off the steps of her front porch ignoring the cold and her lack of coat to get into Jasper's arms faster. Her smile shone brightly as she flew into his arms. Jasper stifled the groan the pain in his shoulder caused as he pulled her in tight and met her lips with his own. By the time Jasper released Alice from his kiss, Edward had disappeared into the house.
"What a welcome," he hummed. "Good morning, sweetheart."
A trickle of delight rippled over Alice's shoulders. It wasn't only the cold that made her shiver; it was her husband's touch and his warm breath against her cheek.
"Good morning," she beamed. "Are you hungry?"
Jasper nodded shyly and stroked Alice's cheek with the tip of his finger. He was still stunned by the knowledge that she was really his. It showed in the way he carefully lifted his hands to cradle her face.
"I missed you," he whispered.
Alice couldn't prevent the wetness from welling in her eyes.
"I missed you too," she replied lifting up on her tip toes to give Jasper another kiss. A second shiver ran through Alice and Jasper wrapped his good arm protectively around her shoulders to keep her warm. "My parent's are here to see us off. Come on, let's get you inside."
An hour later, after a hearty breakfast, Jasper helped Edward load the last of Alice's bags into her car. Jasper shivered. It wasn't from cold weather or the stern look of warning he'd received from Alice's father when they departed moments earlier. It was from the unnerving sense of deja vu passing over him.
"It feels like we've done this before doesn't it," Edward mused feeling the haunt of a similar goodbye that passed between them the year before.
Jasper lifted his head from Alice's trunk to see the expression on Edward's face. He smiled softly but there was a tinge of sadness visible in the crinkle of his eyes.
"We have," Jasper teased. "Only this time, we're not searching anymore. We've both been lucky enough to find what we were looking for," Jasper smiled and tilted his head back toward the house.
Edward nodded as the aforementioned blessings came down Alice's steps. Bella held RJ while Alice carried Serena. Both children donned their winter bunting to keep out the cold. Jasper placed a gentle kiss on the top of his namesake's head.
"I'll tell you all about the trouble I got into as a boy, later," he promised. "But for now, be good for your ma."
He then turned to Serena who was cradled in Alice's arms.
"My lady." He bowed like a knight before a princess, before pressing his lips to her chubby paw. "All the stories talk about fairy godmothers and magic and ponies, but what you really need is a godfather who will both spoil you rotten with sweets and keep the boys away with a long shot rifle."
Bella and Alice laughed while Edward muttered amen.
Alice leaned over and kissed Serena on the cheek. "I'll miss you," she whispered with a hug.
Bella handed RJ to Edward and wrapped her arms around Alice and her daughter.
"We'll see you soon. There's going to be a wedding right?" Bella teased. "We'll another one anyway," she added with a bit of sarcasm.
Alice flushed, but Bella's words had done the trick and lightened the somber mood that settled over the couples. After a few more hugs and promises to see each other soon, Alice watched through tear filled eyes as the Masens backed down her driveway. She followed them with a frantic wave goodbye before their car finally disappeared.
"Are you ready?" Jasper asked, holding out his hand to her.
A huge smile graced Alice's face. "Never been more," she answered.
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"One room for the night" Jasper said a bit nervously rocking on his heels with his hands behind his back.
"Just one night?" the clerk confirmed suspiciously.
"Yes, just the one night."
Alice did her best to stifle the laugh that was threatening from her lips.
The elderly hotel clerk eyed Jasper wearily, taking in his flushed appearance, rumpled khaki shirt and the blushing girl standing behind him. Alice couldn't help it, at this point she had to look down or break into laughter at her young husband's nerves. It had been a long day on the road and if Alice wasn't so ready for a hot shower she would have let Jasper flounder a little longer. After all, if she'd been the hotel's manager, she would have questioned the propriety of the couple before her too.
Alice leaned over Jasper's shoulder, being sure she spoke loud enough for the manager to hear.
"I can't wait until we get to Texas. I'm so excited to tell your folks about the baby. Your mama will be so excited to hear another little Whitlock is on the way."
Jasper turned to Alice, looking at her like she'd grown a second head. Alice ignored his confused look and leaned conspiratorially in the direction of the manager.
"We've been so thrilled with the news but this morning sickness is awful. Honestly I have no idea why they call it that, it can kick off at any time. One moment I'm fine and the next, half of my dinner is all over the floor." Alice lowered her voice a little as she stepped closer to the registration desk. "We've just had a full meal at the diner down the road and I'm just hoping I can keep it down tonight." Alice grimaced, placing a light hand over her stomach. "Do you think you'll have our room ready soon?"
To emphasize her point, Alice purposely removed the glove of her wedding band clad left hand and lifted it to her mouth trying to appear a little green around the gills.
"Yes, ma'am," the clerk quickly replied. "And I'll personally ensure we have extra towels sent up to your room. Robbie!"
The manager snapped his fingers to summon the bellboy for their bags.
"Room 209, for Mr. and Mrs. Whitlock," he said, handing over the key to Jasper. "Congratulations, and have a pleasant stay."
Alice led a very confused Jasper by the hand over to the stairs. Together they followed the bellboy up to their room. Their wedding had been fast but he knew Alice wouldn't have signs of expecting that quickly.
"Alice, why—" Jasper began.
"Because I prefer sleeping in a bed rather than in the back of my car."
"That doesn't make any sense, of course we weren't going to sleep in your car."
"I assure you, we would have. The manager seemed to consider your nerves as an indication of our marriage status, or lack there of."
Jasper's eyes went wide. "You mean he thought—"
Jasper didn't even finish his sentence. He turned on his heel and began marching back down to the old goat. He'd be damned if he'd let a man think untoward thoughts about his wife.
"Jasper," Alice soothed, catching him by the arm of his coat. "Please don't. I'm tired and it's not worth it. I've lived a lot of my life not caring what people thought of me. Trust me when I say that I've survived despite their unkind thoughts. I'm stronger for it."
"What he was thinking of you was disgusting. He should be kicked in the teeth for it."
"The only kicking I intend for you to do, is kicking off your shoes and climbing into bed with me. Wouldn't you rather do that?"
Alice punctuated her words by lightly tracing the gloved fingertips of her right hand over Jasper's lips. One eyebrow and one flaccid appendage lifted in response and all thoughts of the night manager suddenly vanished from Jasper's mind.
"I'm in so much trouble," Jasper said thickly, acknowledging his wife's power over his mind and body.
Alice laughed and turned back in the direction of their waiting bellboy. "You're not at the moment, but you will be if you don't join me soon."
Being bad is starting to sound awfully good, Jasper mused.
The bellboy barely had time to shut the door before Jasper had Alice in his arms. His lips found hers then moved swiftly to her neck and collar bone. With trembling fingers he undid the buttons of her coat, pulled off her final leather glove and began to work the buttons of her blouse. One by one the buttons disappeared beneath the silk opening his beautiful wife further to him. Alice's hands lifted to Jasper's hair sifting and gently tugging until his mouth left her neck and rejoined her lips. His chest rose with heavy breaths in excitement and anticipation. Gone was the shy boy from a few nights back. Jasper was feeling both confident and eager.
The zipper slipped down the back of her skirt. The loosened garment slid from Alice's hips and over her silky stockings. Unable to be as patient, Alice kicked off her shoes and tugged Jasper toward the bed by his belt loops. More clothing found its way onto the floor until the only scrap item covering anything on Jasper was his socks. Alice too found herself in a healthy state of undress. Only in her stockings and garter belt had yet to find their way to the floor. Her tongue encircled his as her fingertips danced along the planes of his naked chest. Jasper pulled her flush to him eliciting a groan from his new wife.
Alice felt her face became hot with embarrassment as she realized the sounds were coming from her. She wondered how she'd gone from being a quiet schoolmarm to a wanton woman overcome with lust for this man. Alice raked her teeth over her lower lip and looked up at Jasper with a mix of desire and apprehension.
Jasper froze with his chest heaving and his body aching for her touch.
"What's wrong?"
"I…" Alice began and then stopped. She took a deep breath to settle her nerves and then started again. "I want…I want to take a shower."
"Oh," Jasper said as he stepped back to release her. "Okay," he added wondering why Alice would want to stop when a moment ago it seemed nothing would stop them. Perhaps after a long day of travel she needed to feel refreshed before she would feel comfortable being amorous. Jasper tried to temper his disappointment with patience. He turned to find her bag so he could place it on the bed for her.
Alice caught him by the wrist. His very apparent excitement had not faded.
"I don't want to shower alone, Jasper."
If Alice were being honest she'd have to admit that she'd been thinking a lot about not showering alone. In fact not showering alone had been on her mind all day. She figured that not showering alone and standing upright would allow Jasper to take the lead even with his bad shoulder. And despite the power he'd given her on their wedding night, Alice was all for this new position that not showering alone would allow.
It took Jasper another half second to realize what Alice was implying. Her face was now red and her teeth were leaving a white impression in her lower lip.
"You mean, in the shower?"
All Alice could do was nod or hope the ground would open up and swallow her whole for her brazenness.
Jasper's face went from one of disappointment to surprise to evil glee in about two seconds flat. The lustful look in his eyes gave Alice the confidence she needed. She reached out and stroked him, eliciting a suppressed moan from her husband. He barely had the composure to grab her by the wrist and pull her into the bathroom.
Alice had no idea that her thoughts would soon mirror the ones Jasper had in the hall outside their room. She hung onto his good shoulder for dear life as water poured over them both. Steam rose from the room fogging the glass while her fingers sought purchase on a towel rack. Her breaths came heavily as she and Jasper learned a whole new way to enjoy a shower. Alice trembled in Jasper's arms and the parting smirk on her face matched her somewhat wicked thoughts.
Being bad is starting to sound very, very good.
Alice stepped out of the still steaming bathroom to find Jasper sitting up in bed. The sated feeling of their first joint shower was still fresh on her body and in her mind. She gazed lovingly at her husband who had one hand in his hair and the other rattling a pen between his teeth. On the bed sat a copy of the King James Bible, covered with a nearly blank sheet of stationary. Only two words graced the top of the page, Dear Alec.
"Are you stuck?" Alice prodded as she slipped off her night robe and crawled under the covers.
"I think you have to have more than two words to be considered stuck. I'm more like frozen."
"I can thaw you out," Alice offered as she traced his writing arm with a feather light touch.
"You already did. Are you interested in a second go around?"
"I—I didn't mean it like that," Alice answered with a crimson hue floating on her cheeks. "I meant I could thaw you out of your writer's block, but we could again…if you'd like."
Jasper ran his nose along Alice's chin, settling it behind her ear. She smelled sweet and fresh from their shower. It wouldn't be difficult for Jasper to distract himself from the task at hand.
"I'd love to get lost in you again, but I fear I'm only putting off the inevitable."
Alice moved to the middle of the bed and sat with her back against the headboard. She gently pulled on Jasper's shoulders, positioning his back to her front. Her fingers through his freshly showered hair, tracing the wet curls that were currently more brown than blond. A content moan escaped Jasper's lips as her free hand massaged his neck and bad shoulder. They were both tired but Alice had a feeling that they wouldn't get much sleep if Jasper didn't get his thoughts off his mind and onto that paper.
"What are you thinking?" Alice asked.
Jasper hesitated for a moment then sighed. "Have you ever been caught by your mama with your hand in her cookie jar just before supper?"
"What me?" Alice replied, feigning innocence. "I was perfect. I never stole sweets before suppertime. That was all my rotten little sister's doing…right before she told on me."
Jasper laughed. "I'm being serious."
"So am I," Alice teased indignantly. "That little tattletale was rotten to the core."
Jasper sniggered then took in a deep breath. He seemed to need more air in his lungs to lighten the weight resting on his chest.
"Right before I left for Berlin, Alec gave me some orders. He outranked me and basically gave me some marching orders before he left for home. They were his words to live by, if you will. The thing is, Alice, when I was captured, it was because I hadn't listened to a single one. I ignored every order, every reasonable command he gave me and you and I both paid a heavy price for it."
Jasper's words, though seemingly forthright, didn't make sense. In Alice's mind there had to be more to the story.
"I don't really understand. Why didn't you obey them?"
"I got separated from my troop and I heard an American calling out for help. I ignored the basic rules of warfare when I went to help him. I went off alone; I left my back open to anyone within earshot. Worst of all I laid down my weapon before I understood the situation."
"You tried to help someone in need, Jasper. That's who you are. That's the man I fell in love with. Please stop beating yourself up for being a good man."
"Being a good man nearly got me killed and in the end, it didn't make a bit of difference."
Alice waited patiently while Jasper summoned the courage to finish.
"He died right beneath my fingertips. His name was Bobby Tanner. He was a Pathfinder who had tried to escape the Russians."
Alice wrapped her arms around Jasper, hugging him tight and pressing her cheek to his.
"Of course it made a difference, Jasper. You were with a man when he took his final breaths. He didn't die alone because you were there. It is a noble thing to ease someone else's suffering and put their life before your own. If the circumstances had been different, I would have wanted no less for you. I know Tanner's family will take some comfort in knowing that someone was with him at the very end."
A long silence blanketed the room as Alice struggled with how to make Jasper see himself as she saw him. It frustrated her to see him look so self deprecating and right then and there vowed to help him through his pain. For tonight there was little more she could do than encourage Jasper to finish his letter and hope it would help him begin to lay his ghosts to rest.
"I'm sure Alec will be upset that you went through hell to get home, but like everyone who loves you, we're all just happy to see you alive, Jasper. You don't have to tell Alec everything in one letter," she said while pressing her lips pressed tenderly to his temple. "Just let him know you made it home. The rest can come later."
Jasper nodded and kissed Alice softly. He urged her to get some rest and said he would follow shortly. Alice was about to argue when she recognized the pleading look displayed on Jasper's face. He wanted to do this alone. Alice kissed him softly and placed a gentle hand upon his cheek.
"I'm here if you need me," she whispered.
"I know, sweetheart," he sighed. "Thank you."
With Alice safely tucked in beside him, Jasper picked up his pen and prepared to keep at least one promise he'd made to his friend.
November 24, 1945
Dear Alec,
My letter may reach you a few days past Thanksgiving, but I assure you that my tardiness could not be avoided. I made it back to the States just two days ago and my first stop was Easton. That, my friend, should bring a smile to your face. It sure as heck did mine.
I hope you, Jane, and your boys had a happy Thanksgiving and that you're as fat and happy as any man of your advanced age should be. It would certainly do me good to see you with a punch belly, a smoking pipe and a faithful retriever at your feet.
So, where to begin? Well, you know as well as I do that I was expected to be home sometime in September. I didn't make it. In fact, it's purely by the grace of God I'm here at all. I can practically feel your frustration and worry through this paper, so I guess now is as good a time as any for my confession. The truth of it is that I didn't abide by your parting orders. Not only did I not stay with my unit and cover my rear, but I went out into the open alone. The ramification of one split second decision was both swift and severe. I'm sure you're eager to give me an earful, but please save the swift kick you're aiming at my backside for later. For now, just know that I'm alive. It's more than I deserve and more than I can say for many others.
I have little doubt, Alec, that you would have been screaming my name and cursing me as I ran into harm's way. Just as I have little doubt that you would have been following right along behind me covering my tail. Perhaps, my return might have been a lot quicker if you had. Perhaps you would have met the same fate as some others whose paths I crossed in my effort to evade capture, but you weren't and for that I am grateful.
I've been thinking about VE Day and the night we lit the fire in the common. I now have more than a few names to add to the list of poor souls taken well before their time. Alice tells me to be happy that I'm not one of them, but my mind can't seem to let go. It curses me with the sense that somehow I could have done more, been stronger, faster, braver…better. I can see now why you didn't want to talk about your time in Africa. The ghosts are hard to set free.
I'm heading home to see my folks. We should arrive in Nickel Creek in about a week. I know they're aching to see me. They'd gotten word that I didn't make it and had a hard time of it these last few months. I hope to make it up to them, though I'm not exactly sure how.
The bright spot in all of this is the new addition to my family and the light of my life, Mary Alice Brandon Whitlock. We were married the same night I came home. Now before you question my honor, just know that I did not force my lady into the bonds of marriage. I stood there like a deer in headlights and nodded yes when she asked me to marry her. Ahh Alec, I can feel your grin from across the country. Yes, she's a pistol and the perfect woman for me. You can stop patting yourself on the back for catching onto that fact well before I did. Instead, I'll be happy to share a draft or two with you at my wedding. You see, I extracted a promise from Alice to allow me to marry her again before God, family, and friends. Only Bella and Edward know of our elopement so far and I'm dreading the coming lonely nights in my childhood bed. As I write, I'm shaking my head wondering how you ever left your Jane to go off to war.
I hope your transition from fighting the war back to civilian life has been an easy one, though somehow I doubt that it has. I pray you've managed well. Deep down, I pray that not only for you, Jane, and your boys but also selfishly for me. Knowing you've managed all right will give me some hope for myself. Don't let your head swell when you read this, but I've always looked up to you. I could use my friend and his seasoned words of wisdom to help see me through right now.
I'll leave you with a happy thought. I met Colonel Swan in Easton. (Not to say that is my happy thought.) It turns out he lived in the same town as Alice and had known her for many years. It's more than a coincidence, but I'll fill you in on why later. For now just picture our steadfast colonel ready to breathe fire, chew up and spit out young soldiers, kowtowing to my five foot tall Mrs. and his one year old grandbaby who by the way calls him papaw. I have to say, Alec, after witnessing that, I know I've now seen everything.
I'll write again once the date for the wedding is set. I sincerely hope to see you there.
All the best to you and yours, my friend,
Jasper
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The dust of their weeklong travel had settled into every conceivable crevice of Alice's car. By the time they'd reached Jackson, Tennessee, they seemed to be carrying an awful lot of each little town's dusty roads with them. Although the dirt was an annoyance, it did little to distract from the views. Each sunrise and sunset was a sight to behold. Jasper took in each one as if it was an oasis for his lost soul. In a sense it had been. Familiar and unfamiliar sights made him smile. Everything from the sleek shine of new Buicks, Hudsons, and Studebakers to the cheerful whistle of a gas attendant made him happy to be home. Attendants pumped gallons of gas instead of liters of petrol and once more dollars made purchases while pounds were something you gained after a hearty meal. Jasper was sure he'd put back at least five of the ones he'd lost while abroad. They ate chicken and biscuits in Jackson and sliced pork barbecue, baked beans, and slaw in Arkansas. He spared no expense when it came to dining or purchasing anything pleasing to Alice's eye for he felt rich in love and in money with Alice on his arm and the last two years of his GI salary in his pocket. Though he'd have to watch pennies more closely once they settled, he took each day for the gift that it was and tried to enjoy it to the fullest. That was the only thing Alice had asked of him, and he was doing his level best to honor that request.
Each time she laughed at one of his lame jokes or flashed a secret smile in his direction, his heart nearly jumped out of his chest. It was a week of discovery and their own private honeymoon as they traveled the country together. That's not to say all of their talks went smoothly. On the seventh day of their trip, somewhere between, Little Rock and Texarkana, Alice felt the need to voice an apology. Her simple statement kicked off an argument neither of them could have anticipated.
"Jasper, I wanted to say that I'm sorry for the way my father treated you."
Jasper turned his head curiously from the open road, wondering exactly she was apologizing for; he felt no ill will toward Mr. Brandon.
Alice sighed. She was still embarrassed about the way her father cross-examined him, and in her own dining room no less.
"He shouldn't have been so rough on you about your intentions."
Jasper laughed at the way the word intentions, came out of Alice's mouth. It was as if the word was as horribly old fashioned as the idea of her father was trading her to Jasper for five sheep and a small dowry.
"He was just doing his job, Alice," Jasper soothed.
"His job?"
She knew Jasper was trying to let her father off the hook so as not hurt her feelings but in Alice's opinion, her father's display was both infuriating and rude.
"Yes, his job. It's his job as your father to be sure you're well taken care of."
Alice's mouth puckered at the idea that she needed to be taken care of. She'd been doing it on her own for several years and quite successfully at that.
"I respect my father. I know he loves me. In turn he should respect that I would not choose a man who wasn't a worthy and honorable person."
"I took no offense to his questions, Alice. He was only looking out for you."
"I took offense to them. I'm not eighteen years old, Jasper I'm a grown woman. Wasn't the fact that you were my choice good enough?"
"Of course that's important, but there's something inherent in a man that drives him to protect—"
"Jasper Whitlock, if you say the delicacies of a female, I'm going to throttle you," she replied curtly, growing more frustrated by the minute.
"If you're asking me to deny that I'd protect you in the same manner then I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to only punch my good arm."
"Don't you see? That's exactly what I'm trying to tell you. I don't need protection! I'm perfectly capable of choosing a man for myself. And I can assure you I wouldn't aim for your arm," Alice challenged. "I'd aim for your head because right now you're being infuriating!"
"And you're being pig headed," Jasper shot back. "Alice, if we're lucky enough to be blessed with girls, I will most certainly expect their future beaus to ask me for their hand in marriage. If they're not man enough to look me in the eye and ask, then they're not man enough to take my daughter's hand."
"Oh, they'd be your daughters. Yours, not ours?"
"No!"
"What? No?" she barked accusingly.
"I mean, yes. They'd be our daughters. Argh! Fine if you want them to ask us both, Alice, then they can ask us both."
"Fine."
"Fine."
The couple fell silent for a moment. Hearts racing, blood pumping in the aftermath of their first quarrel. The irony of the fact that they were arguing over imaginary future daughters and future beaus was lost on both of them. To Alice, Jasper was stuck somewhere in the early 1900s. To Jasper, Alice was denying a man the right as husband to look after her. (Even if she could already look after herself.)
By the time they'd stopped for supper the silence between them had stretched for over an hour. Both felt uncomfortable but steadfast in their beliefs. Jasper turned in his seat to face his wife who was purposefully ignoring him by looking out her window.
"Alice, can you see why protecting my children and the love of my life would be more important to me than anything else?"
"Yes, if you can see why I want to walk beside you through life and not behind you. Don't take on more than you need to alone, respect me enough to let me share the load."
And suddenly they were talking about more than phantom future offspring. Jasper weighed Alice's words for a few moments before letting out a heavy breath that sounded more like an exhale of defeat.
"Don't sell your house," he finally whispered looking down at his hands.
"What?"
"If you want me to share the load then I'm asking you to not sell your house."
"I don't understand. The extra money could help us start our new life. And although Cindy doesn't need the money right now, I'm sure her half would help with child rearing when the time came. Collin is still just starting out as a reporter."
Alice looked over at Jasper who had his head hung low and his eyes shut.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Here you are opening up to me like I asked, and I'm already shutting you down. I have a lot to learn too," she said, stroking back the hair that had fallen into his eyes. "Tell me why you don't want me to sell it."
"Because I don't know if we'll be able to make it with me as a rancher. The work is hard and I don't know if my arm will ever be the same."
Alice's heart broke as she watched Jasper's face crumble with the weight of his confession. She quickly moved to him and wrapped her arms around him.
"Jasper, it will be okay. You said yourself it will just take time."
"I know what I said, Alice. I'm just not sure that it's true."
"Your father and Sam will help. I know it."
Jasper looked up from Alice's shoulder and in his eyes she could see a longing to be whole. He didn't want to have to depend on anyone. It was a need she herself understood all too well.
"I won't sell the house," she promised with a reassuring shake of her head. "Maybe we could rent it for the year and see what happens?"
Jasper nodded and let out a breath of relief.
"Thank you for understanding," he whispered. "I love you."
"I love you too," she answered without missing a beat. "Thank you for letting me into your mind as well as your heart. It means more to me than you could ever know."
Jasper's lips found Alice's and they soon discovered that making up was the best part of having a fight.
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The morning of the final day of their drive was filled with a nervous energy. Jasper couldn't keep from imagining the look on his parents' faces, while Alice fidgeted in her seat hoping she'd make a good impression on her in-laws. Mae Whitlock had been very gracious in her response to Alice's letter of introduction last month, but things were certainly different now. Alice hoped she'd be seen as good enough in his family's eyes. Suddenly Alice had a whole new appreciation for Jasper's turn before her father's firing squad.
Jasper chanced a look at his wife as he made the final turn down the dirt road that led to his family's farm. Alice was beautifully flushed from the Texas heat and yet the manner in which she fidgeted let him know she was nervous.
"It will be fine," he soothed. "They're going to love you. My ma will be overjoyed and my pa will ask me what I did to hornswoggle you into being at my side."
Alice smiled a little as the car rolled slowly along the dirt drive and up to the house. Jasper shut off the ignition and grinned in excitement. Once more he was startled by the nervous look on Alice's face. Impetuously he reached over, took her by the back of the neck and kissed her…hard. By the time he let up they were both breathing a bit hard and suddenly Alice's flushed face had nothing to do with her nerves.
"I love you," he said determinedly, making sure she felt his love all the way down to her toes. "Come on, let's go."
Jasper hopped out of the car and ran around to Alice's side. He was lifting her hand to help her out when the front porch door swung open and an anxious looking gray haired woman stepped out. She was drying her hands with a dish towel and raised her eyes toward Alice's sedan parked along her drive. A second later realization lit her face, erasing the wrinkles of worry that lined her face and replacing them with the brightest smile she'd worn in two years.
"Sam! SAM, HE'S HERE!" Mae shouted.
The chickens in the yard clucked furiously at the old woman as she tore off the steps. She hit Jasper full on and wrapped him in the tightest hug she could muster. Jasper did his best not to wince in pain for he would not allow himself to bring this woman any more worry over him. Not if he could ever help it. Mae was crying and laughing, shouting at him for making her worry and kissing his cheeks all over. Her eyes were bleary with tears, but her smile held a joy Jasper thought he'd never see on his mother's face again. His father, Sam, came hobbling off the steps to meet them, choked with emotion. Jasper heard him crying, "My boy, my boy is home."
Alice could only watch with her gloved hand covering her mouth. She was trying desperately to hold back her emotions as she watched Jasper's father wrap his arms around his boy. She'd never expected to witness such emotions between a father and a son. After a few minutes of watching Sam embracing Jasper, she knew she'd been right about Sam Whitlock all along. He was a man who truly loved his son. Alice looked away feeling embarrassed to be intruding on such an intimate moment. She clasped her hands together realizing that she was trembling with emotion herself.
After a few more moments to enjoy his reunion, Jasper released his father and turned back to Alice. He stretched out his hand to her and a huge smile appeared upon his face when she took it. With an incredible feeling of pride he turned back to his tearful parents.
"Mom, Dad, I'd like you to meet the love of my life. This is my Alice."
A/N: Thanks for following along with this story. I'll see you next week. ;)
If you get a moment me know what you think,
-FirstBlush
The Long Way Home Historical Research and Reference Guide: Chapter 37 A Road Less Traveled
Story reference: Charlie describes meeting Bella's mother Renee in Illinois at a Walgreens where he worked as a Soda Jerk.
Historical Significance: A soda jerk is the name given to
Source: http:/www(dot)walgreens(dot)com/marketing/about/history/hist3(dot)jsp
http:/en(dot)wikipedia(dot)org/wiki/Soda_jerk
Story reference: Jasper describes eating chicken and biscuits in Jackson and pork BBQ in Little Rock
Historical Significance: Web research wasn't much help in finding local fare for AK, so I turned to this interesting page on presidential food favorites for help.
Source: http:/www(dot)foodtimeline(dot)org/presidents(dot)html#clinton
Story reference: Jasper describes seeing shiny new American cars on the road during their drive to Texas, including Buicks and Hudsons.
Historical Significance: Postwar car production began as early as spring 1945 and continued to pick up as American manufacturing turned from military needs back to consumer goods.
Source: http:/www(dot)(dot)au/car_spotters_guide_usa_1946(dot)htm