The English Paper : A "Hobbit" FanFic.

*Disclaimer on all LOTR/Hobbit material belonging to Tolkien and movie lines from Peter Jackson*

XXXVII: Look After You

A/N: I highly reccommend listening to "Look After You" by The Fray while reading this chapter.

Pippa watched as Kili wiped up the last stain of blood on arm and she smiled watching him treat her arm like it was the Arkenstone. He had been there from the beginning. The boy she sat next to at Bilbo's house, the boy she bantered with in the Shire, the boy who was afraid to tell her how he felt, the boy who fell in love with the good parts and the bad parts that made her, and the boy who was her first love and her last one. To lose him would mean losing every good thing about her.

She wanted to say something. She had the urge to tell him everything she had felt for him just incase; however that only made it worse. Her eyes burned a little at the thought of never being able to hold him and never laughing.

"If I," she began but her voice trailed off. Kili looked up and set down the cloth he used to clean the blood. He set his hand on her knee and his dark brown twinkled with concern as his full attention rested on her.

"What is it Pippa?" he asked gently. Pippa bit her bottom lip and she tucked his hair behind his ear, the move he had always done to her. He took her hand in his and her heart grew heavy, the tears begining to come.

"If I don't, if...if I never see you again after today, there's something I want you to know," Pippa trembled. Kili nodded and assured," You can tell me anything, Pippa. You know that." Pippa shook her head and lowered her head as a tear landed on Kili's hand. He lifted her chin and whispered," Come with me."

He stood up and lifted her up as well and led away from the others. They ended up at the camp site the company had been staying at and the voices from the others could no longer be heard. Pippa and Kili felt themeselves become the only people in the world.

"What's troubling you Pippa?" Kili asked as the palm of his hand rested on her cheek. Pippa looked up at him and conjured up every sane part of her to tell him.

"I want you to know that no matter what happens after today, whether you live or die, I love you. I love you so much. You are always going to be the best thing that's ever come into my life and I know that you deserve so much better than me, but I love you for loving me. I'm sorry for every fight and for almost ruining us in Mirkwood and I'm sorry I almost couldn't tell you. I am terrified that I'm going to lose the only thing that makes sense in my life. I can't live without you, Kili, but if I have to, as much as it will kill me, I will always love you."

Kili stroked her cheek with his hand and his face grew weak. His mouth trembled and he pressed his forehead to hers. He closed his eyes for a moment then kissed the tip of her nose and pulled back. A small smile formed on his face.

"Do you remember the very first night at Mr. Baggin's house?" Kili asked. Pippa smiled nodding.

"Do you remember when you thought I had someone back home?" She nodded.

"Do you remember I told you we had to share a horse?" She nodded, giving a laugh.

"Do you remember that night in Rivendell?" She nodded, rolling her eyes and laughing at the memory.

"Do you remember Goblintown when I promised you that I wouldn't let anything hurt you?" She nodded.

"Do you remember that night at Beorn's house with the camp fire?" She nodded.

"Do you remember Laketown?" She nodded. Kili smiled and said," Don't ever let anyone tell you I deserve better than you. Without you, this journey wouldn't have a meant a thing to me. The moment you woke up at Bilbo's house, I knew I had to get close to you. You were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. You bring out the best in me and we have our differences but those differences are what I love the most. If anything happens to me, I will always look after you no matter where you are Pippa. Don't think of the worst that could come out of this though. Think of the life we will build when it's over. Think of growing old together and think of our foul-mouthed, micschevious children. Think of our life when it's over."

His arms grasped her body and pulled her to him, holding her tightly. He buried his face in the crook of neck and he heard Pippa whisper," I wish we could just runaway from this."

He felt his chest grow heavier and his grip tightened. "I wish we could as well," he told her. "But I can't leave Fili and Thorin."

"And I won't stop you from protecting them," she told him. He looked back at her and pressed his lips on hers, the both of them taking in the final moments they would have alone. He prayed to live to continue these moments as did she.

He let go and told her," If you want to fight in this battle, Fili and I agreed with our uncle you would have to stand on the rock above to shoot orcs with the arrow. That way, you can run when it gets bad and you won't be in too much danger."

Pippa smiled at Kili's attempt of letting her be in the battle. She nodded and replied," You're putting trust in me in the battle."

"I always trusted you," he admitted. He leaned in for a kiss and pulled back for a moment as he lowered the both of them down to the ground. He pulled her to his chest as her legs swept off his. She smiled and rested her head in the crook of his neck.

"Uncle is starting to gather everyone," Fili announced. Kili and Pippa looked up and Fili noticed the tears in their eyes. He regretted his announcement and added," I hate this."

Kili and Pippa stood up and Pippa hugged Fili as Fili held onto her. Kili hugged the both of them and Fili excused himself.

Kili and Pippa walked back hand in hand and Kili told her," Just remember that once this is all over, you and I will live in love and peace."