CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

I don't really think I had a clear picture of what it would be like to put on a wedding in less than a week. Granted Edward said he had been working on preparations for a while but it didn't really hit me until the next day.

I walked down the stairs the morning after our romantic food tasting to a very enthusiastic house full of people. Breakfast was being made while every person seemed to talk of nothing but wedding. I didn't realize as I stood in the doorway to the kitchen that the daunting crowd that awaited me was just about to grow.

"Mommy, I finally get to wear my princess dress." Gracie was the first to spot me and announced my presence to the room.

"I know. Exciting right?" I took her hand.

"Oh good, you're up. So Edward is spreading some nasty rumor of Chicken Cordon Bleu. I just have to say if that's true, you know I bloat." Rosalie started.

"Have you decided what you were going to do with your hair? I know you said no veil but really Bella. A girl only gets to wear a veil once in her life." My mother said.

"Babe, Emily is flying in and should be here in the next couple hours." Edward said.

"Hey, the important question is… when is the bachelor party?" Emmett slapped Edward hard on the back.

"Yeah, when is the bachelorette party?"

"You have to have a bachelorette party, I can watch the girls."

"Are you still going to go with roses? I have allergies"

"Mommy, when can I put on my princess dress?"

Overwhelmed didn't even cover it.

"Someone's at the door. Someone's at the door." Gracie jumped up and down at the door bell ringing.

"Embry, can you get that?" Edward yelled over all the commotion.

The questions kept coming and I hadn't even answered a one of them.

"WE'RE HERE! Let's get this party started." Jacqueline started screaming.

She was with Angela, Ben, Marcus and Emma and Ian.

"Weren't you just so surprised? I'm so happy for you." Jacqueline squeezed me.

"That was a rather dreadful flight. I needed to take a sedative." I could hear Marcus say.

"So back to this bachelorette party." Rosalie picked right back up and all the sudden there were more voices. More questions. So much noise.

"Do you think I will still look good in my dress, I think I gained three pounds since I last tried it on?"

"Bella, what about the centerpieces?"

"Baby, we still have to go and meet with the reverend but I think we can wait until Emily gets here. What did you think about with the courtyard? Did you want the ceremony there or the reception? I know it's' your favorite spot in the castle." Edward asked while he kept a firm grasp around my waist.

"I think…I think…" Everyone suddenly halted their questions to hear what I was about to say. "I need to potty."

I jumped up and quickly left command center. I couldn't take anymore. I would go pee. Well, fake pee but at least that could buy me a couple of sane minutes. Maybe if I go fake poop that could buy me a couple of hours…

Suddenly diarrhea never looked so good.

I locked myself in Edward's and my bathroom and I don't know what possessed me but I made a spot for myself in the bathtub. I wanted to take a bath but I knew that was out of the question because there was so much to do in so little time.

Centerpieces?

Dresses?

Veils?

It was all so overwhelming.

"Bella?" Angela called out to me. "Are you okay?"

"I'll be fine." I muttered.

I heard a key go into the door and a second later she opened the once locked bathroom door.

"How did you get a key?" I asked.

"I know that Edward keeps a key on the top of the door frames. He's always done that." Angela said climbing into the bathtub with me.

Edward had learned early on in our relationship that I like to lock myself away. He didn't value privacy the way most people had.

"Wow, you've come a long way, Swan." Angela looked over to me. "Still sitting in bathtubs trying to escape your problems."

"Creature of habit." I replied.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"So many questions that I don't have any answers to. Veils. Parties. Reverends and courtyards." I sighed.

"Well, just take one at a time and remember this is about what you and Edward want. You don't need to think about anyone else."

"You're my maid of honor can't this be about what you and Edward want? I think it falls in line with your duties…"

"Nice try." Angela rolled her eyes.

"I think I want to stay here in this bathtub until it's over. There's scary people out there." I rested my head on Angela's shoulder.

"I think there's scary people in here. Did you just hear yourself? You want to spend your wedding week in a bathtub."

We both laughed.

"I miss you." I said.

"I know. Me too. Guess we both really did have to grow up." She sighed.

"Is everything okay in here?" Edward pushed the door open slowly.

"Does it look like everything's okay? Your fiancé is in a bathtub, fully dressed and hiding?" Angela snapped. "Cullen, you have a job to do. When you see the circus downstairs start to become overwhelming it's your job to get all the animals back into their cages." Angela shook a foreboding finger at him and he immediately looked scared of Angela. Which I don't blame him.

"Okay." Edward agreed quickly.

Angela pulled herself out of my bathtub and left us.

"So…are you going to come out now or should I join you?" Edward asked.

I looked out the window that overlooked my lake.

"Can't I just stay in here for a little while longer?" I sighed.

"Okay." Edward replied and then he climbed in to join me.

We didn't say anything to each other. We both just sat in an empty bathtub that overlooked a peaceful lake with the clock on our wedding ticking down.

The next time I walked down the stairs to breakfast, I had Edward holding one hand and this time it was a much different experience. Everyone was sitting at our massive dining room table passing along food as we came to join them.

There were no overwhelming questions. Just friends and family sitting together, happily enjoying a meal.

Before Emily and before any talks of reverends, Marcus managed to steal me away first.

"Hands off. There will be no wedding if there is no wedding dress. So I suggest you all go find someone else to pester for the time being." Marcus snapped and then he took my hand and pulled me upstairs.

I have to say I think I should make Marcus my new maid of honor. The looks on everyone's face…

"Thank you. You have no idea how much I love you right now." I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well if you've lost any more weight since last I measured you, I may not offer the same praise."

Marcus locked us in and told Edward that if he went anywhere near the bedroom he would personally castrate Edward, himself.

Marcus placed the dress over my head and down the long heavy ball gown went. He started to do me up in the back while I played with the layers of chiffon.

"Well it looks like it fits properly. Happy that I didn't take it in too much. You've gained weight." He stated.

"Blame Edward and his mandatory two thousand calorie diet." I grumbled.

"Good for Edward. You don't look so sickly any longer." Marcus walked over to the garment bag and started to unzip another small compartment.

"And at the request of your mother because she is right, you only do get to wear a veil just once in your life." He said and then pulled out a beautiful flowy veil that had little crystals sewed into it.

He placed it on my head.

"Oh Marcus. You…you truly out did yourself." I gushed.

"Thanks to you, I have been thinking of doing a wedding collection. I have so many ideas."

I turned to him and took his hands in mine. "Thank you, Marcus. I am honored."

"Stop with the tears. I can't afford to melt." Marcus fanned his face and then pulled away embarrassed to show emotion.

I skipped down the stairs happy that I could cross at least one thing off my list.

"One down, fifty billion to go." I announced.

"Not fifty billion, babe." Edward rolled his eyes. "Emily's here. She's just getting settled and then she will be right over."

"Okay, lay it on me, what's next?" I readied myself.

"Calm down, Bella. We are going to get through this. I promise."

"We better and just so you know, you better have one kickass honeymoon planned."

Edward smiled at my grumpy disposition. "Yes, ma'am." He came in and laid a sweet kiss right next to my ear. "Oh and baby, for what I have planned…you might need to take an additional week off just to recover."

It took a moment for me to grasp just what he was saying and I'm sure my face was quite the picture. Confusion slowly morphing into a nice crimson blush.

Oh my!

With Emily finally here and Emma; I managed to start feeling a lot more confident about our prospects of actually pulling this off. I had no idea that Edward was able to get so much done without me knowing. Really it was just loose ends.

I flopped down on the couch in the family room exhausted from the day while some of our guests readied dinner.

"Can we finally talk bachelorette party?" Jacqueline asked dramatically.

"Guys, I just don't want one. I really don't see the need for one." I sighed.

Sad as it may be, I really didn't want to have to spend the night away from Edward and I will say right now part of me didn't want him to spend the night away from me because knowing Emmett, Edward's bachelor party I just knew was going to include strippers. Call me old-fashioned but I didn't want to picture Edward surrounded by strippers or prostitutes depending on what route Emmett took.

"Swan, you're not going to ruin this wedding for me." Rosalie growled.

"You guys can go out. In fact, please go out!" I encouraged.

"Come on, B. Party hard." Embry cheered.

"Bella, stop being such a wet blanket. Edward's going to go out and have fun." Emmett called from the kitchen.

"Actually Emmett, if Bella doesn't want a bachelorette party then I don't want a bachelor party." Edward declared.

"What the fuck?" Emmett yelled.

"Emmett, there are children upstairs." Rosalie reprimanded him.

"Bella, you can't be serious. You're ruining everyone's fun." Emmett whined.

"I'm not ruining anything. You all want to go out and get drunk and party, be my guest. I don't understand why you need me to do that." I defended.

"If she doesn't want one, she doesn't have to have a party." Edward stated.

"Thank you." I looked to Edward and offered up my gratefulness that he was behind me.

"You guys are the worst couple ever." Jacqueline pouted.

"Once again I would just like to point out that everyone still can go out and party. You can get drunk, get freaky, and have an orgy. I'm not stopping you." I announced to the whole room. "In fact, please go. Go now. I have more important things to think on."

I got up from the couch and walked out the back door. It was so much more quieter out here. I walked down the grass to the boat dock where Edward's yacht was still stationed. Even after all this time, I was still scared to go on that boat without the proper supervision.

So much time had passed since I was last here. So many things had happened. It almost felt surreal.

"Hey Bells…wanna talk?"

"Not particularly, Jacob." I sighed looking out over the water.

Jacob plopped down on the dock, leaning his back up against the post. I walked to the other side and mirrored him.

"Wonder how cold the water is." He said.

"Colder than one would think, trust me." I replied thinking back to the time I fell from this very spot.

"Hmmm….I was just thinking of going in…"

"Are you out of your mind? You'll freeze."

The air was cold but not freezing cold but I also knew that the lake wasn't attached to any kind of heater and I sincerely hoped Jacob was joking.

"Well, you only live once. What the hell." He said and then started taking off his shirt.

"Jacob, stop it. I don't need you sick right before the wedding."

"You could talk to me. That may keep me from doing something stupid."

I rolled my eyes, "Why do you care? Why does anyone care whether or not I have a bachelorette party?"

"I…am more curious of your reasons why you're so against it."

I crossed my arms and stared into the rippling water.

Jacob sighed and stood up. He started unbuttoning his pants.

"If you get sick and can't come to the wedding, don't blame me, best man." I huffed.

"You can say that but I know you'll feel guilty." Jacob replied. He was stripped down to his boxers and I know he must have been cold. I mean it had to be sixty degrees out here. He sat back on the dock and dangled his legs out over the side.

"Holy shit that's cold." He gasped.

"Yeah, dumbass." I shook my head at his stupidity.

"Guess I better get to it." He baited.

"Guess you better." I didn't think he would do it but Jacob looked at me one last time and then pushed off from the dock and landed in the water. Water lightly splashing up on me.

"Fuck! Fuck this is cold."

"Would you get out of the water? You made your point." I yelled.

"Can't. Not until…you tell me…" His teeth were chattering.

"Damn it Jacob. Just get out!" I demanded.

"Tell me."

"There are a couple of reasons. You want me to write you a fucking essay?" I snapped.

"No, but I would really appreciate it if you could hurry on up." He was treading water and shaking. I should have left him out there but damn my conscience.

"Damn you, Jacob." I growled. "I…just…don't want to be out partying knowing that Edward is probably having his junk all rubbed up on by some stupid slut. I didn't tell him to not have a party but do you really think I will be able to go anywhere and not constantly think what will go on with my fiancé. I'd rather sit at home in a nice hot bath and fret about it."

"So if I were to promise that Edward's junk would remain ungrinded upon or untouched, you would consider going to a bachelorette party."

"I don't know…there's…something else that has been kind of bothering me. I don't want to tell Edward because I don't want him to worry but then last time I was in Lake Bracciano and I got the brilliant idea of partying into my head…something happened with a certain unsavory resident. I don't know why but it kind of bothers me knowing that there may be a chance that I could run into him while here partying in his stomping ground. It…kinda maybe feel a little unsafe…"

Jacob stopped treading and swan over to the dock. He hoisted himself back up on the dock and started to reach for his shirt.

"God, you're an idiot." I chastised him.

"I'm the idiot? You're the one who wants to ruin everyone's fun because you actually think that Edward would ever touch another woman who wasn't you or wasn't for work purposes."

"Everyone can still go party…"

"Bella, there here for you. The girls are here for you and the guys want to take Edward out. It's tradition. People have flown thousands of miles from their home because they want to celebrate this whole experience with you. I have no idea who this is that has you worried, apparently I was left out of the brief on that one…but I can promise you that Edward would never allow you to go out if he felt it would be unsafe. We will make sure that everything is safe. Just…let them all have their party."

"Fine." I sighed. "I will go and get drunk and end up in some scandalous Italian fountain situation where I'll be sure to smile big and pretty for the cameras." I gave him my best cheesy smile.

"That's my girl."

We started to walk back up toward the house. Jacob shivering the whole way.

"So…what's this about an unsavory citizen?" Jacob poked.

"Just some guy I dated when I first got here. He…turned out to be quite a jerk."

We walked into the house and everyone took in Jacob's appearance, I couldn't help but mess with them.

"That's right, I'll throw anyone in the lake who tries to go against my wedding wishes from now on. Are we clear?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Stop it, Bella." Jacob brushed off, rolling his eyes. "She finally agreed to a party!"

There may have been screams for joy as Jacob left to go and get changed.

"What changed your mind?" Edward asked.

"Uh…Jacob can be persuasive…unfortunately." I cringed. "I have a feeling he may want to talk with you."

"Dinner's ready." Emmett called.

Edward seemed distracted but we walked to the buffet line that was all set up.

"I hope you agreed for the right reasons. I don't want you doing anything you don't want to do." Edward whispered into my ear as we stood in line for food.

"We…compromised."

Edward let it drop for now but I noticed his absence as well as some other Tria Fata member's absences after dinner. I sat down in the living room to play UNO with the girls and some of our house guests.

"I am so happy that I finally got Jackson down to sleep. I swear that plane ride screwed up his sleep patterns." Alice flopped down onto the couch. She looked positively exhausted.

"If you ever need someone to take over duty, I'd be happy to help." My mom replied.

"Thanks Renee!"

"So…bachelorette party?" Rosalie started.

"No wedding talk while we play UNO!" Gracie demanded.

I kissed her on the head, "I love you!" My five-year old managed to put people in place for me.

"Mommy, come on. I want to play." She whined pushing me off her.

"Becky, you start." Savannah said.

It was nice to spend a couple of hours away from weddingdom. I knew it wouldn't last long but the whole point of this vacation was so that we could all have fun and relax. I wanted Savannah and Gracie to at least have fun.

"Okay everybody, listen up." Emmett came back into the room with Jacob and Edward.

"We have decided something about the upcoming bachelors…etts…parties."

"This is a no wedding talking area. We are trying to play UNO." Gracie stood up and gave her best serious face.

"Gracie, give Emmett the floor. You can go back to playing UNO in a minute." Embry replied.

Gracie sat back down and folded her little arms over her chest and scowled.

"Go on." Jacqueline pressed.

"We are going to throw a co bachelor and bachelorette party." Emmett declared.

"What?" Rosalie yelled.

"No." Jacqueline complained.

"Why?" Angela cried.

"Ladies, this is for the best. Calm yourself." Emmett barked.

"Hey, don't you tell me to calm myself, Emmett McCarty." Rosalie looked pissed. "We don't want a coed party. There is a reason why the damn parties are to remain separate."

"We can't have fun with you guys around." Jacqueline argued.

"I move to veto the motion." Rosalie ordered.

"Rosalie, I want to speak to you, now." I had seen that look in Emmett's eyes before and suddenly I was a tad worried for my friend.

Rosalie held her head up high and gracefully exited the room with Emmett.

"Stay strong, girl." Jacqueline yelled after her.

Edward came over to me. "You didn't have to do that." I said softly.

"I wanted to. Jacob told me about your concerns and…I second them. I won't be able to have a good night wondering where and what will be going on with you."

"Do you think we're going to ruin our friends' night?" I asked.

"Somehow…I think they'll suffer through just fine."

And he was right. The party was planned for Wednesday night and by then a lot more of our friends and family had flown into Italy. Emmett rented out a dance club in Rome for the night and with the amount of alcohol, sweating, dancing and frolicking going on. Our friends did not miss us for even a moment.

In fact Edward and I laughed about it for years after that our friends never even noticed that Edward and I managed to sneak away for a couple of hours and go and have a toast to our last couple nights officially as single people.

I may have had two drinks and a couple of appetizers, when Edward hatched his wicked plan.

"Come on, don't trip." Edward laughed and I giggled as he took my hand and we snuck out through the kitchen of the night club through the ally way. There were loads of paparazzi out front but a bus boy was kind enough to sneak us out the back and arrange for a taxi to pick us up.

"Where are we going?" I asked excited for the first time.

"Anywhere we want." Edward leaned forward, "Could you take us to a really good restaurant?"

The driver took off and we both laughed ourselves silly at the thought of all our friends faces when they realized that we had left.

The driver took us to this small cute little restaurant with only a couple of patrons inside. The owners where dear to us and more than hospitable.

"To my beautiful fiancé. My wife and my life." Edward raised a glass of champagne up and we toasted.

"To my husband…he never gave up on me and there will never be anyone I can ever love more the he." I replied.

We kissed and then spent the meal in happy conversation. We may have had a couple of bottles of wine… so by the time we decided to return back to the party being thrown in honor of our arrivederci to single hood, we may have been a tad tipsy.

You see Edward and I weren't sad to be saying goodbye to single hood. We wouldn't miss a thing from our single days. I had found the man I wanted to be with for the rest of my life when I was just twenty-two. He unfortunately had to wait till he was almost forty.

I was lucky. I didn't have to wait for years and years while plowing through relationship after relationship and wonder if I could eventually settle for someone. Edward unfortunately had to wait and go through relationship after relationship but in a way I was envious of that. Not because I wanted to go and date more men but because I wanted to know that I earned Edward with my patience. I had it far too easy. Didn't seem fair.

"Thank you, Michael. You're the best." Edward said slyly handing the busboy a bill while we scooted through the kitchen to get back to our party.

"Ready to face the inquisition?" I giggled.

"Maybe we should just stay in the kitchen and get smashed here." Edward laughed.

"Come on, Cullen. Time to face the music." I pulled Edward through the doors and right back out into the loud crazy party.

We started to walk back to our table and said our hello's when we passed people.

"Was the line for the bathroom long?" Rosalie said from where she sat upon Emmett's lap.

"Uh…yeah…really, really long when you have to drunk pee." I sang loudly.

"Wow Bella, what have you been drinking tonight?" Alice asked.

"I don't know but I'll have what she's having." Edward barked out a laugh and our friends looked at us like we were crazy.

"Let's go and find some more." I pulled Edward with me and our tipsy asses went off in search for more alcohol.

"They didn't know." I yelled.

"Shhhh." Edward shushed me. "They can still hear us."

He covered my mouth and we both looked back at the table where our friends sat. Each one of their faces was full of confusion. We turned back away from them and busted up laughing.

I'm not sure how we managed to make it home that night but Emmett loves to retell the story stating that Edward and I, the moment we were put into the SUV, started to rip each other's clothes off. He said that if it wasn't for him, we would have never made it to our wedding night having kept the celibate pact.

As it was Emmett and Jacob put Edward upstairs in his room for the night and the women threw an impromptu slumber party for me downstairs. Unfortunately, I just didn't have youth on my side anymore and sleeping on the ground wasn't as comfortable as it once was when I was a child. I had to spend a good part of my next day in the spa with Edward which was just fine for mine and Edward's hangover.

I'm too old for this shit.

AN: Thank you for reading and reviewing!