Chapter Thirty-Eight

Misgivings

Right at the crack of dawn, Francis and Ben arrived at the Ministry and hurried straight into Thomas Craw's office after receiving the matching notes stating:

Holding your wife hostage against her will. If you do not appear within my office before breakfast to retrieve her, I shall be forced to make her sign a statement waiving all rights in naming your unborn child over to me and without veto privileges. Don't tempt me to prove just how serious I am… T. Craw

In fact, as the two of them arrived in the doorway, Thomas already had pulled out the notebook on Craw family lineage and was reading the most ghastly of name choices off to the two women who sat quite somberly in front of his desk.

"Bah, I thought I told Hastings to take his time," Thomas complained disappointedly, while Alex and Alicia got up in relief and hugged their husbands.

"Actually we would have been here sooner had we not stopped to drop Janus off at Corey's," Francis said. "What on earth have they been doing?"

"Ah, fancy you mentioning that," Thomas said, pulling out a list while both of the girls grimaced. "Unauthorized Entry into a secured Ministry vault…well, perhaps not quite so secure…" Thomas grunted, the two women glancing at each other ruefully. "Twenty-eight counts of attempting to cast a spell within a Ministry vault, three counts of actually succeeding in casting a spell in a Ministry vault," Alicia covered her face. "Breaking and entering in a cabinet stored in a Ministry vault, and Espionage without prior authorization. To which, I agreed to release them from all charges if they agreed to a complete and unconditional surrender. To which, they agreed, but don't ask them what the terms were. I put a curse on them so they wouldn't be tempted to tell anyone."

"Did he really?" Ben asked nervously.

"Yep," Alex said somberly, while Thomas had a look of grim satisfaction on his face.

"Well, we'd better be getting back, I've a class to teach in an hour," Francis sighed. "Are they released, sir?"

"No, but you can take them out of my sight for now," Thomas decided and waved them away. The four of them left then, the two men giving their wives sideways glances curiously, but not even Alex seemed much inclined to talk for a while after that. But Thomas pressed his fingertips together where he sat at his desk, contemplating his next move for a moment before adding Alex and Alicia's surrenders to his special family collection, glancing through the others curiously with a frown when he realized he was still missing one.

Jennifer wandered down the back stairs so intent on the library that she finally noticed something strange with the stairs. She had barely taken a couple steps down them when she suddenly heard the sound of singing and found herself on the second floor landing. She blinked, stared up the stairs and down them again, wondering how exactly she had done that. But it was as she was standing there trying to figure it out that the choir broke into a new song; the most beautiful melody she had ever heard in her life.

Immediately distracted and wishing she could hear the words from where she was, Jennifer wandered off to find out where they were practicing at and found herself soon standing in the doors of the service room just as they finished the song.

"Well done, well done, I noticed you all remembered to use your choir voices this time, that's very important…" Sally said, the choir gazing at her with dubious expressions. But as she turned, she noticed Jennifer standing in the doorway and smiled warmly. "Ah, Professor Craw! Need anything?"

"Oh…no, I just stopped to listen. What was that last tune, Professor Scribe? It's beautiful! I've never heard anything like it before," Jennifer said, the entire choir staring at her with bewildered expressions.

"Hogwarts Forever, Headmaster," Sally said with an enigmatic smile, while Jennifer stared at her with amazement. "Care to hear it again?"

"Oh yes, please," Jennifer said eagerly.

"All right everyone, pick your tunes…and choir voices, now, don't forget that, we have an audience, after all," Sally said. The same melody that Jennifer had heard from the stairwell pierced the air with pure, true notes. Even if the words were more than a little corny, the harmony more than made up for it as each student's voice seemed to complement the other right up to the finish. Sally smiled at them approvingly, turning to Jennifer. "How did it sound, Headmaster?"

"Perfect, absolutely perfect," Jennifer said, and Sally beamed at her. "Keep up the good work."

"Thank you, Professor," Sally smiled turning back around and ignoring the fact the choir was looking at Professor Craw as if she were quite mad. Jennifer turned around with a smile to see Hermione standing there with some paperwork.

"Sorry, didn't want to bother you, but I'm ready to head out for the evening," Hermione explained.

"Have a good time, then," Jennifer smiled. "Doesn't the choir sound wonderful this year?"

"Oh that, well, I'll have to tell you when they get to the next song, I suppose," Hermione shrugged, Jennifer gazing at her thoughtfully. "Most Deputy Headmasters don't hear that song sound as anything but a mess, you know, although I did hear Minerva say she began to hear the melody after she retired. But generally speaking, and if you're saying what I think you're saying, only Headmasters earn the right to hear it. So if you're hearing it, it means you've got your headmaster powers now."

"Wait a minute, does that mean Severus can't hear it anymore?" Jennifer asked worriedly.

"I have no idea," Hermione shrugged. "Maybe he can, considering Minerva heard it after she left the school, but I wouldn't take any bets on it." Jennifer's face fell, listening to the choir's next song a moment and then shaking her head.

"I hope so. I really hope so," Jennifer murmured. "Because if I just accidentally took that away from him, I really don't want it," she admitted before wandering down the hall.

Severus tossed and turned for a bit before finally getting comfortable enough to sleep, staring at the window that stayed obstinately closed. For some reason it reminded him of his time in New York in that noisy old room above Kingler's Café, when he was spending most of his time wondering if Jennifer would ever be whole again. And yet now he found he was wondering the same thing about himself. At this point, Obliviation would almost be a blessing, he thought dryly. Perhaps then he would be able to get away from that nagging feeling that he wasn't where he was supposed to be so he could finally feel like he could chose where he wanted to be. Why was it that the more he sought closure to his old life, the less capable he found himself of moving on? Why was it even after weeks of being away from the school, he still felt as if he hadn't gained back one ounce of the control he had lost?

His unconscious mind desperately sought refuge from his uneasy thoughts, but it was inevitable that they would seep further in and invade his dream…a dream that started out almost pleasant. He was in the hot water springs in the caverns beneath Villahexa, although how Jennifer finally managed to talk him down there, he wasn't quite certain. It was, however, definitely Jennifer by his side, but with her hair up like she wore it now and gazing lovingly at him over the top of her rose spectacles. Then he blinked, realizing quite suddenly that was all she was wearing.

"What are we doing here?" Severus heard himself ask.

"Well, it was your idea, you know," Jennifer grinned at him mischievously, putting her arms around him. "When have I ever been able to say no to you?"

"Oh, please, someone spare me from the submissive kitten act," said Samira, as Severus turned in surprise to see her on the other side of him. "Honestly, Severus, haven't you weaned yourself from that thing yet? Why don't you boot her out of here so we can have some real fun," she purred.

"Um…"

"Please don't send me away, Severus," Jennifer murmured, her green eyes turning so haunted and lonely that another surge of guilt went through him. Samira stared at her with open disgust. "I really do just want you be happy, whatever that takes. I will go, I suppose, if that is your wish, but if I have to share you to keep from losing you, I will."

"Share?" Samira said indignantly. "I do not share."

"Actually, I'm rather intrigued by this whole sharing concept, really…" Severus put in.

"Oh, no you don't! I've had enough of the docile dove, and you should have had enough too. Twenty some odd years of that sort of woman would put anyone off," Samira said, while Jennifer just frowned and held tightly onto Severus. "Don't you think it's time to move on and experience something new?"

"I did leave, didn't I, Samira?" Severus said.

"Then what is she still doing here?" Samira demanded.

"Because I love him, Samira," Jennifer said firmly. "And that is a concept you are incapable of understanding, now or ever. You only see him as someone to own, to take advantage of, and to satisfy your lusts on."

"The attraction is hardly one sided, dear girl," Samira tsked at her.

"That may be," Jennifer said quietly. "But it's going to take a lot more than a broken heart to get me out of his mind, Samira, and nothing is going to keep me from loving him no matter how much he hurts me. I'm staying."

"You know, I think the real problem here has to do with the fact that you have me, but she doesn't have anyone else to play with, Severus," Samira said with a thin, wicked smile on her face. "But don't worry, that can be remedied easily enough."

"Exactly what do you mean by that?" Severus frowned at her.

"Simply that dear Jennifer probably needs a boyfriend of her own. Someone who appreciates both her defiance as well as her sensitive nature and knows how to excite them…or at least take advantage of them…actually, come to think of it, it might take more than one boyfriend," Samira mused with feigned innocence. "How about dozens of boyfriends? No, no, no, hundreds ought to do it," she decided. But as Severus stared at Samira's smug grin trying to figure out what she was talking about, a multitude of strange dark shadows formed behind them, moving oddly in the flicker of the candlelight.

"Severus?" Jennifer said unsurely, glancing around her. Suddenly she screamed as the shadows closed in and she was ripped away from him, the shadows completely swarming over her as a curious crack of light appeared in the air and she was pulled in.

"Where's Jennifer?" Severus demanded, chilled by her screams as she disappeared.

"Don't worry, Severus, she'll be well taken care of," Samira said with a lilting voice as she closed in on him. "Besides, now that she's out of the way, you're about to get the better end of the deal." Samira kissed him, demanding his full attention, and Severus quickly gave in, almost immediately forgetting what had just occurred, no longer caring about anything but what they were doing. He was completely unaware that somewhere in another part of his head, a part of him was shouting at the top of his lungs, begging him to stop. A battle ensued, a battle that the dream Severus was blissfully unaware of as he finally gave in to Samira's desires, until sanity finally took hold and Severus forced himself awake, sweat pouring off his face from the horror of the nightmare.

"No…no…I'd never do that to her. I'd never leave her in danger like that! What was I thinking?" Severus said out loud, trying to push out the memory of what had happened after that point out of his mind. "It was just a nightmare. If it had been someone else's influence, I'd have sensed it," he murmured, and then felt sick to his stomach that such a dream could have come from him.

He lay down and closed his eyes again, trying to clear his mind, but something kept nagging him, something that wouldn't go away. Whatever else in the dream had been wrong, the fact that Jennifer was being put in danger by what was going on in his life somehow rang true. In fact, he couldn't shake the feeling that something terrible was going to happen to her, and whatever it was, he wasn't going to be in a position to stop it.

When Severus came downstairs the next day to grab his paper and check his post, he stopped short halfway to the bar, for at the far end nearest the door sat Thomas Craw with a cup of coffee he had yet to touch. Instead Thomas had been busy murmuring quietly to Rosmerta, who was leaning over the bar intent on the conversation, matching his quiet voice. Immediately, Rosmerta broke off the conversation and pretended Thomas wasn't even there, ignoring to questioning look on Severus' face when she dropped off his newspaper and post and slipped out of the room to finish getting ready to open.

"I see you're out early today," Severus said quietly.

"If that obnoxiously obvious statement is your attempt in striking up a conversation with me, you are wasting your breath, Snape. I'm not in the mood," Thomas said curtly.

"Then why are you here, if not to talk?" Severus asked.

"The world doesn't revolve around you, Snape, at least not anymore. And what I do is none of your business," Thomas said.

"I simply wanted to ask you how Jennifer was doing," Severus said. Thomas slowly turned and stared at him for a moment before taking out his wand, and immediately Severus dropped behind the bar out of sight. Unconcernedly, Thomas put his wand on the bar in front of his coffee.

"Let's get one thing straight right now, Snape," Thomas said, downing enough of the coffee that it would fill back up again. "The only thing keeping you alive right now is the fact that my grandchildren would suffer from your death. But I swear to you, if there ever came a point that they suffer more by your living, you will die by my hand; I don't care how powerful the world thinks you are. All I see is a pathetic old man who has wasted his entire life from boyhood up until now feeling sorry for himself, and at the expense of everything else. You've brooded over every negative event that's happened to you, even the ones that you and you alone were responsible for, and you've lashed out at every single person that was remotely connected to those events whether or not they truly had anything to do with them. At the same time, you have done nothing but take anything positive going for you completely and repulsively for granted; your job, your friends…what little you have of those; your health, your family, and most of all my daughter. You are sixty-three years old, man, no matter how young you look! Grow up!" Thomas growled, downing the coffee and getting up, grabbing his wand and keeping it in hand. "I'll see you later, Rosmerta. You'll know where I'll be if you need me…especially for something like an eviction notice or something, I could really enjoy that…" Thomas decided.

"Take care, Thomas," Rosmerta said, walking to the door to let him out.

Severus sighed, grabbed his post and paper and went back upstairs, tossing them on the table before tying up his hair and grabbing a coat and his wallet. Descartes let out an inquisitive caw, and Severus went over and opened the lid of his fish barrel.

"I'm just going to Corey's, feel free to stay here," Severus told the bird, who contentedly perched himself on the barrel, apparently glad he didn't have to go anywhere.

Without saying a word to Rosmerta, Severus slipped out of the Three Brooms and strode down the street with his hands in his pockets. But as he got near Corey's, he turned the corner on a whim and strode down a side street. He stopped and stared at the obstinately present brick wall with a long sigh before finally making his way back to Willowby's Wands and Weeds and stepping in. It was early enough that the place was quite empty and, in fact, Corey was busy helping his clerks restock when Severus walked in, gazing at his father's sullen face for a moment before smiling at him.

"Hi, Dad! Need anything?" Corey asked.

"Yes, quite a few things, actually," Severus admitted, handing him a list. Corey stared at him with exasperation.

"You just had to write it down, didn't you," he chuckled, reluctantly reading it as they walked over to the counter, glancing down the list of ingredients and prepared potions thoughtfully. "Not sleeping well, I take it?" Corey said, Severus sighing in response. "And what's with all the headache potions…and heart's ease potions too. Is there really that much stress in rune research as all that?"

"Could I get my potions without the psychoanalysis, if you don't mind?" Severus asked tersely.

"Sorry, Dad," Corey said sincerely, before fishing through the shelves in the back, Severus following behind. "So how are you doing…except for the obvious complaints, that is," he added.

"Fine, thinking of going abroad after Fortuna's birthday," Severus said, glancing at the potion labels distractedly.

"Ah. Not alone either, I bet," Corey said, unsurprised when Severus didn't answer right away.

"Has anyone told you lately how impossibly Gryffindor you still are?" Severus snapped irritably.

"Not since the last time you came in here, no," Corey grinned at him. "But if you're worried about my criticizing it, I'm not going to. Especially considering the stress you're under, it might do you some good to get away without feeling like the entire family's breathing down your neck."

"I don't feel like the entire family is breathing down my neck," Severus said defensively, crossing his arms. "Far from it, considering the only contact I've had with anyone was either incidental or initiated by myself for the most part…with the exception of Thomas, that is," Severus added dryly.

"Well, grandfather deserves a bit of leeway," Corey decided. "He's just being a concerned parent, and nothing you wouldn't do yourself under similar circumstances, whether you want to admit it or not." Severus thought about it.

"Perhaps," Severus admitted.

"As for the rest of us staying away, don't think it wasn't without a bit of sitting on us and twisting an arm now and again," Corey said, pulling a couple of potions off the shelf.

"By whom?" Severus asked.

"Mom, who else?" Corey said, shrugging when Severus gave him a blank stare. "She said the reason all this happened was because you felt like you were out of options and that we needed to give you the freedom to make your own decisions, regardless of how they might affect us. She told us that you had the right to choose your own life, and that she'd hang us up to dry if we got in the way," his grin suddenly turning serious. "She loves you, Dad."

"How is she?" Severus finally got out. Corey shrugged and smiled.

"All right, under the circumstances. She's got the best support group anybody can ask for, between family and Hogwarts, after all," Corey said, Severus nodding slowly at that. "Andrew says she's turning into a smashing Headmaster. She even has the board eating out of her hand, although under some protest of Balmweed and his corner of cronies," he chuckled. "Personally, not so well, I suppose, but that's understandable with what all she's going through." Severus nodded slowly.

"And you're fairly sure she's not over her head in anything else right now?" Severus asked. Corey gazed at him thoughtfully.

"Not that I know of…she has Alex and Alicia looking into that ring business, but I'm sure you knew that. Or is the ring what you meant?" Corey asked.

"I'm not sure what I meant exactly," Severus admitted. "I've just had the feeling that something was wrong with your mother lately."

"Try looking in the mirror, Dad," Corey said, pulling something else off the shelf. But even though that wasn't what Severus had meant, he didn't feel like talking after that.

As they were walking back to the front, Severus heard the bell above the door and glanced up in surprise as Samira walked in, giving him a smug yet questioning smile as she strode in.

"Ah! So this is where you've been hiding this morning," Samira said. "Rosmerta only said that you went 'out.'"

"I was hardly hiding," Severus said, coming back around the counter while Corey was busy looking her over with a curiously deadpan expression. "This is my son, Corey. Corey, Samira Lamya."

"Oh really? Lamia as in Queen of Libya, or lamia as in seductress?" Corey asked with a polite smile. Severus' eyes darted over to his son warningly, while Samira's smile thinned noticeably.

"Lamya with a 'y'," she explained.

"Yes, I'm sure that makes a difference," Corey said with a smile and a nod before turning to his father, ignoring the squinting look he got in return. "I'll just put it on your tab, Dad, I don't want to hold you guys up. You should think about getting a check up with Sagittari, though, considering I'm not supposed to give you a couple of those without a doctor recommendation you know."

"Sagittari's back?" Severus frowned.

"Never left. Andrew says he returned the day before classes in January," Corey explained, Severus gazing at him thoughtfully. "Like I said, you might want to visit. Oh, and Rose told me that the crocuses have bloomed in Keki's Grove, if you're interested. Might do you some good for those nerves to take a walk too."

"Nerves?" Samira inquired, gazing at Severus fixedly.

"Thank you, Corey," Severus said quickly, although there was a slight hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"No problem, Dad," Corey said, then watched them exit, thinking about all the things he would have liked to say to her and hadn't.

"I don't suppose you would like to take a walk?" Severus asked as they left. "You haven't been to Keki's Grove yet, have you?"

"No, what is that?" Samira asked, a bit annoyed when he gently took her hand off his arm and reminded her they were in public.

"A grove of trees at the edge of the Dark Forest," Severus said, Samira grimacing slightly. "It wouldn't be a dull walk, Samira. I could show you the Lia Fal and perhaps we could get away from my room for awhile."

"The Lia Fal?" Samira said with interest, but then glanced over at the tree line. "Oh, but…well, it is quite cold, isn't it, for that sort of thing? And I'd much rather have a drink at the bar or something."

"Since when do you turn down opportunities to be alone with me?" Severus asked in a low voice.

"Well, I need only wait a few more days, mustn't I?" Samira said flirted. "Besides, I'm parched."

"I have never seen anyone drink as much as you do short of a dwarf with a weekend off," Severus said, Samira flipping back her hair enough to put a hand on her hip.

"Have you ever seen me out of my senses with it? Not once, Severus, and don't you dare say you have," she said. "Besides, I think you could use a drink as well, if you're having trouble with your 'nerves' lately," she said, lowering her voice as they walked down the street. "You don't need those nasty potions for that, Severus, I could easily give you a massage or something. I'm very adept at making you forget about all your troubles when you let me," she said flirtatiously, wiggling her fingers out in front of her.

"Yes, so you are," Severus said, but there was a strange abrasion in his voice that she hadn't heard before.

Yet before she could question it, they were stepping back into the Three Brooms, which had opened during Severus' absence. Rosmerta looked up the moment they entered and waved them over.

"A note was dropped off for you while you two were out, Samira," Rosmerta said, getting it from under the counter. "A Ministry note."

"Really? Left here?" Samira said, and Severus cringed at the thought that anyone would have done that, expecting her to be here with him. Samira opened it and her lips thinned more and more. "Sorry, it seems I'm needed elsewhere. I need to take off for awhile," she said.

"Trouble?" Severus asked.

"Trouble for someone at any rate," Samira said with a dangerous flash in her eyes. So, someone decided to break in the Artifacts vault and go through the cabinet did they, she fumed as she strode out the door. Someone was going to have to pay for trying to working against her, and this time she knew exactly how to get even.