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Chapter 38 – Animal

Makatza pulled away from the group when she saw the sea, she knew the next stop was the gallows but she wanted to feel the water around her paws. She trotted over a sand dune covered in long grass and slid down the opposite bank. She immediately felt better as the tiny grains of sand wiggled their way in between her pads. Bubble sniffed the grass on the bank and barked at Hawke. Makatza bounced in a slight circle and made her way to where the sea was lapping gently on the shore. She sniffed some nearby seaweed in curiosity.

Hawke shouted at Varric and Fenris that they were making a little detour, they turned around to see Merrill disappear down the side of a hill. Varric shrugged his shoulders and walked to where Hawke was waiting. Fenris sighed but turned around as well. He had no doubt it was Makatza who had decided to stop. His feet slid a bit as he walked up the sand bank but he managed it without falling over, he looked over at the beach, Varric and Hawke had sat down on a few rocks that had washed up, Merrill was drawing things in the sand much to the excitement of Bubble. Makatza on the other hand was sitting away from the group in the surf, Fenris smiled to himself, and walked down the hill causing a small pebble slide.

'Hey Broody sit down enjoy the fresh air!' Varric said his legs dangling from his rock.

'Why are we here?' He asked, even though he knew the answer.

Hawke laughed at Bubble but replied, 'Katza, I guess she wanted to feel better, you know how she loves the sea. These last few days have been pretty heavy for her. Besides I quite like it here.'

Bubble ran across the beach chasing a stick that Merrill had found for him, Fenris looked at the others and debated asking a question, eventually he gave in and asked. 'Do you think one of us should talk to her?' Hawke laughed at Bubble who was bouncing around, Varric chuckled along with him.

'If you want to Fenris, she can understand us, just not the other way around,' Hawke said, 'I always say something wrong, she looks like she could talk to someone who understands.'

Fenris frowned, 'what do you mean?' He was worried that Hawke had figured the imprint out.

'Y'know it's hard adjusting to a new life, you had to when you fought for your freedom, it's confusing and you can end up thinking that you're all alone, you did.' Hawke shrugged his shoulders, 'so you can relate.'

Fenris relaxed a bit, he kind of understood where Hawke was coming from, it didn't make much sense but it didn't need to for Hawke to utter it. He nodded ignoring Varric's grin and mental note taking and walked down to meet Makatza. He watched her for a moment. As he watched her image blurred.

Makatza was no longer sitting in front of him the waves drenching her fur, instead she stood, tall and proud. Human. Her long ebony hair twirled in the wind, she wore a deep blue dress that was floating around her ankles, she turned to face him, her freckled face beaming as she saw that he was stood there, her eyes glittered in the sunlight, she walked toward him her feet kicking up the water and she left footprints in the sand. He blinked in confusion and the vision disappeared and there Makatza sat as she always had.

He looked down at the sand, there were paw prints, not foot prints, he rubbed his temples. I am going crazy he thought his mind reeling. He had no idea what just happened, he didn't really want to tell anyone either, if it happened again then he would let someone know. Just in case he was going insane. He dismissed his thoughts and approached Makatza, she turned as he came closer.

'Hello,' she woofed sadly.

'I was going to ask if you are alright, but then I realized that it would have been a useless question, giving the situation, so I will ask this: What are you thinking about?' He sat on the dry sand behind her. She looked at where he was sitting and loped out the surf. She shook her fur causing a small spray to shower him. He held up his hand in defence, she sat next to him.

'Sorry, I forget,' she whined.

'Do not worry about it,' he said, 'but you haven't answered my question.'

'You're not supposed to understand me remember?'

'We are far enough away,' he tilted his head at the sound of Bubble's barking, 'besides I do not think they are concentrating on us.'

'Fine,' she said defeated, 'I'm worrying about what the Keeper said about my humanity, what if I don't change before I become a wild wolf?'

'You will,' Fenris flicked a shell across the sand.

'But what if I don't Fenris? The thought is scaring the shit out of me!' She whined. She had felt her mind become cloudy and disorientated lately, she had begun to worry that it was already happening.

'You will Makatza I promise.'

'Don't make a girl promises that you can't keep,' she muttered. Fenris raised a brow and she lapsed into silence. It was like he knew something that she didn't, god I wish I could pout, kick and scream, this whole thing is so infuriating. Maybe I should shake again and wipe the smug look off his face.

'How am I going to keep my humanity?' She asked pawing a crab that was scuttling past.

'I won't let you Makatza, even now you do not seem as a wolf to me,' he admitted remembering the vision.

'I.. I think that makes me feel better actually. It's nice to know people still see me as me.' She let the crab wander off with a smile on her face.

'Do you feel better when you are here?' He picked up a stone and skimmed it into the water, Makatza had to resist the urge to chase after it and bring it back. She huffed unhappily.

'Yes I do, it's better along the wounded coast though, there's that little bit in a natural bend causes a tiny little beach that's only accessible by swimming. It looked so peaceful there,' she said wistfully. It reminded her of one of the beaches in Folkestone, they had arches the the water when the tide rose would cut off a bit of the sand, it was a private paradise if you knew how to get there.

'When you turn back ask Hawke to take you,' Fenris suggested.

'Maybe,' she said not convinced that it would happen.

Bubble began barking at them, Makatza cocked her head and stood up. 'He said that Hawke wants us to go back,' she translated. Fenris nodded and they walked back along the beach his fingers brushing against her fur.

Merrill had made a little castle and was looking for a leaf to use as a flag when they arrived.

'Feeling better Katza?' Hawke asked scratching her behind the ear.

She barked a yes, and they left the beach up the the hill they travelled down. It didn't take them long to be ambushed by a crowd of spiders that they had avoided on the way to the Dalish camp, Makatza did the canine version of screaming which was a very loud, high pitched howl. Even Bubble cringed with the pitch. Varric chuckled at her reaction and shot a load of arrows into the air to rain down on the enemies. The group didn't waste any time charging in and slaughtering them.

Makatza was terrified, when she was human they only came up to her hand but now they towered over her their fangs glistening with toxins. Bubble stuck by her side and barked at the ones that came near.

'Watch!' A spider lunged at him and he swiftly jumped out the way, he bounced off his landing and launched himself into the spider's side knocking it over, he tore at it's skin with his teeth and killed it. 'Now you try.'

'You're fucking joking right?' He wasn't she knew he wasn't but it didn't stop her saying it. Her whole body vibrated with the need to protect Fenris who was doing fine by himself. She rolled her eyes sighing. Bubble took down another that had come close and Makatza threw herself at another that was scuttling toward the glowing elf. She snarled and sunk her claws into it's flesh.

It's legs buckled underneath it, she had knocked it onto the dirt and wincing she tore at it's body with her teeth. Oh my god that taste is foul! She felt like gagging but it was still hissing and twitching under her paws. Fucking die already! She ripped deeper with her teeth, blood filled her mouth.

Fenris watched as Makatza leapt at one of the spiders that had been making it's way toward him, she was deadly and didn't realise it. No wonder those robbers ran away, she truly looked wild when she was angry. Wolf or not. He turned to a spider that appeared behind him and stuck it with his blade after a moments hesitation. He pulled it out his nose wrinkling at the blood that dripped off it's sharpened edges.

'Everyone ok?' Hawke asked as he toasted the last spider.

'Yes.'

'Just dandy, although my coat is going to have to be replaced for the third time this month,' Varric muttered putting his finger through a hole one of the spiders had cut.

'I'm fine!' Trilled Merrill, swinging her staff, 'I think they're all dead.'

'What about you Katza?' Hawke jogged over to where Fenris was standing, Bubble was on his heel. She didn't turn around but a low rumble emanated from her.

'I know you're pissed at the spiders but come on,' Hawke chuckled. He moved toward her and she spun around still growling. She snarled at him, blood dripped from her teeth and she pulled back her lips as she threatened.

'Hawke...' Fenris said uncertainly.

'What's the matter Katza?' He went to hold out his hand and she snapped at his fingers viciously.

'Hawke, look, her eyes,' Fenris muttered without moving.

Garrett glanced to where he said and saw no difference in her eyes, until it hit him. Her eyes were different, they were normal. Normal wolf eyes, a yellow amber instead of her vibrant blue and bronze.

'Oh no,' he said quietly.

Bubble looked at her and tried to move closer, she almost lunged at him but the closeness of the others made her change her mind. The wolf was scared and she wanted to run but she was trapped, so she was trying to frighten them.

'Varric keep an arrow on her, I'm going to try and put her to sleep,' Hawke said without moving his lips. Bubble was quietly growling, Merrill looked horrified.

'I wouldn't Hawke, I think she might go for you if you do,' Fenris warned.

'That's a risk I'll take, I want my little sister back,' he snapped.

He slowly raised his hands and the wolf jerked back, the growl intensified. He began to mutter under his breath, the wolf's fear overrode her common sense and she pounced toward Hawke her teeth bared.

Varric's arrow shot off into the distance, Merrill screamed and Bubble barked loudly. Hawke fell into the dirt with a painful bump. He looked over at the wolf. Fenris had pushed him out the way, as she had bitten his forearm he had dragged her down so that she didn't get hit by Varric's shot.

He hissed in pain as the wolf tightened her grip on his arm. His blood flowed from the wound. He had one knee on the ground, his hand that was on the arm that wasn't being savaged had a hold on Makatza's collar, he held on tightly. He could feel her teeth tearing through his skin and flesh, he had to concentrate not to activate his markings and pull her off.

'Fenris!' Merrill shouted. Hawke tried to get closer, her growl increased.

'Don't move!' Fenris hissed loudly, his arm felt like it was on fire, she probably had the toxins from the spider's blood on her teeth when she bit. He knew that Makatza would have never bitten him if she was in control. He looked deep into her eyes.

'Makatza let go,' he commanded.

'Fenris she can't understand you!' Varric said loading Bianca again. Merrill held back Bubble who was trying to move, Hawke brushed himself off and stepped closer.

'She's gone Fenris!'

'No! She's not,' he ignored Hawke's reply, and spoke to the wolf, 'let go Makatza, I promised you, please don't make me break this promise.'

The wolf stopped growling. Her eyes clouded over and returned to their normal colour, one bright blue and one bronze. He let go of her collar and she pulled back. Fenris clutched his arm trying to stop the bleeding, it looked worse than it was, it was deep but it would heal and he could still feel all his fingers, he rotated his wrist, it hurt like hell but it was fine.

'I...I bit you...' she whined.

'It's fine,' he lied, Makatza could see the blood drip through his fingers, she could taste his blood in her mouth, I hurt him, I could have killed him! Varric was going to kill me.. I'm a monster, an animal. I've already turned, it's only a matter of time before I do it again. What if it's Leandra? Or Merrill? These thoughts raced past her mind in seconds. All she felt was the guilt that roiled through her stomach.

'Makatza honestly it's fine,' he reassured. She looked at him sadly, 'we'll take you home Makatza,' he said calmly.

She shook her head, Garrett stepped forward, he began to heal Fenris, 'Katza, come on,' he said, his voice held no anger, only relief.

'Yes Petal come on, the sooner we get to the gallows the sooner you become human,' Varric strapped Bianca to his back. Makatza took a step away.

'Lethellan I'm sorry this is all my fault, but come home,' Merrill tried to stroke her but she jerked away not trusting herself. She looked at Fenris. Why didn't the imprint stop me? Oh. It's because I turned wild, a completely different person... animal.

'I'm sorry,' she howled.

'Makatza! No!' He shouted, but Makatza had already turned and ran off, Bubble didn't wait for his master's orders and chased after her. Fenris pulled his arm out of Hawke's hands.

'Fenris you'll scar! Bubble will find her,' Hawke said. Merrill was shaking and Varric was trying to soothe her.

'I do not care about a scar, what if she changes again while Bubble is chasing her? We have to get going!' Fenris said angrily.

'I'm not saying that Fenris! Merrill's in no shape to go running after her, neither am I, we have no mana in case we have to put her to sleep. We'll go back to Kirkwall find a couple of horses, use a tracking spell and find her with proper provisions,' Garrett had his sensible head on, he so badly wanted to chase Makatza down but he knew it would be worse. Bubble was smart he would keep an eye on her.

Fenris sighed in defeat, 'fine.' His arm had stopped bleeding and he could see the teeth marks that she left. He swore the imprint worked two ways because all he wanted to do was find her.

Well well well. Um yeah. Please drop a review. Lemme know what you think xx