Disclaimer: I, Strange and Intoxicating -rsa-, do not own, think I own, or will ever own Final Fantasy VII or its compilations. I write this because it's fun and I have no life—the end.
Chapter Forty: Sister City of Commotion
The sound was so ugly that it made Zack's head ache and drum with the same wretched tune. Not only was it bad, but borderline insane, with blasting trumpets, drums being beaten so hard there was a loud popping noise of one of the many breaking every few minutes or so, and the cheers of many people. No one in lower, small dreary fish Junon was celebrating.
But that was not why the ex-SOLDIER woke, no matter how much he wished for it to be. It was not the sound, but the little girl sitting half on top of him, squealing into Cloud's ear with delight. He had been in a good dream when she climbed on top of him, sitting there and probably just staring at the blonde, but when Cloud mumbled something in his sleep and turned over, the little thing jumped up. She landed back roughly on top of Zack, who was now completely awake, and began her tirade of questions and pleas of marriage.
"Cloudy! My rescuer! Come on; wake up! I wanna give you a big kiss and snuggle with you! Please, oh please wake up; I promise I won't be loud."
"Already breaking vows, kid," Zack wheezed out. The little girl, the one Cloud had drug from out of the ocean a day before, was squishing him in his bed. "Get offa me." Zack wiggled and the girl fell dramatically and improbably into Cloud, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck and burrowed her face into his shoulder. It reminded him of a little chipmunk or squirrel attempting to get into the ground before the wolf ate it.
Am I the wolf in her head? Huh. Kinda awkward little twerp. Too much like Yuffie... oh Gaia, she was probably the one who set this kid up with these delusions of grandeur and marriage.
The girl let out a wail, and pulled at Cloud's thick blonde hair. If he hadn't been awake after hearing the girl scream he was once she began the game of tug-a-war with his head as the rope. Zack watched in slight amusement, even as his head pounded a bit louder, as Cloud jerked his head away from the girl and began to pry each one of her digits away.
"Priscilla," Cloud started wearily, seeming to be backing away, edging toward the middle of the bed. He held her little hands, only twelve or so, but still so very annoying, and patted them together. "Why are you waking me up?"
The girl scooted closer, oblivious to Cloud's gestures. A thought came to Zack, and a grotesque sneer spread from one corner of his mouth to the other. Cloud had done something very, very stupid the day before and now was the perfect time to extract revenge. He moved away and toward the very edge of the bed. Zack entwined his legs with the blonde's and when the boy attempted to push Priscilla away, he jerked his legs, causing both to fall into a ball of uncomfortable limbs and a squealing fangirl.
Zack could not contain the laughter bubbling inside of him, erupting in a spew of laughter, smiling, and gut wrenching pain caused from a stitch in his side. Cloud's blue eyes were open to the point of seeing the tiny blood vessels around his irises and the violet-eyed man knew that if they would suddenly pop he would have first-class tickets to the show, no matter how disgusting the act would be.
Once, when he was younger, Zack had owned a small, furry mouse named Solaris, which one of the neighborhood kids had accidentally held to hard and squeezed the eyeballs out. Now, looking at the little tween with her arms wrapped around Cloud's throat, squeezing as she chanted their names together in a foray of rainbows and small hearts, Zack wondered if he'd have to clean up the mess again. But, Cloud was much cuter than Solaris had been, so perhaps there would have been more of a waste that having to scrub off mouse blood from his hands.
"Kid, kid." Zack straightened himself out and leaned over, tapping the girl on the shoulder. "If you don't let go of him, he's not going to want to marry you. 'Specially if you kill him. Just imagine: you'd have to scrub Cloudy-poo's blood and gunk offva your hands."
Surprisingly, and almost astounding, the girl let go of Cloud, who was already turning a shade of plum. The blonde grabbed at his neck and leaped off of the mattress. Small sounds, reminding Zack of the poor mouse of his childhood, came from Cloud's mouth. Priscilla already looked ready to grab him again and commence with squeezing, but somehow, miraculously, she ended up laying on the floor, the wind knocked out of her. Zack hid his foot back under the covers and placed a worried look on his face, one that the girl would have no choice but to believe.
Zack clapped his hands together, drawing the girl's bright blue eyes from Cloud. "Hey, yeah, kiddo." Zack scratched his head and pulled at his blankets. "I uh... I think you should probably go home right now. Cloud has to take a shower and all those guy things, and he'll see you in a little while...? Please?"
"But I have to give Cloud something!" she exclaimed as she stood up and shook the fall from herself. "It's really, really important!"
Oh Minerva above, if this kid starts shimmying and pulled her clothes off, I'm going to throw her out the front door, Zack thought as he covered his eyes. The sound seemed to dull down in comparison to the girl's presence. "Hey, yeah." Zack snapped his fingers together in joy. "Why don't you go and get Cloud some water from your house?"
"But there's some water right there, and cleanish cups..." Priscilla gestured to the other side of the small room where a pitcher of water stood on an otherwise empty dresser, a cup dispenser hanging on the wall next to it. A lightly flowered cup stuck out. "And my house is nearly four whole blocks away!"
"But he'd really, really, like some water from your house. Wouldn't you, Cloud?"
Cloud nodded his head as a hoarse rasping sound erupted from his throat. "Water..." he said and his eyes darted away from Zack, who he was staring at as though he was an idiot wrapped in a bubble suit, and to the girl. The raven-haired man noticed Cloud's upper lip lightly trembling, ocean blue eyes wide.
Little fucker is a genius. Almost better at me; he's got that kid wrapped around his pinky finger twenty times over. Zack was barely able to contain the snort that was fighting to come from his mouth and nostrils until the girl jumped up, swinging her brown hair around for a moment, screeching some words which went through Zack's left ear and out the right. It was something along the lines of 'of course my amazing god with blonde hair and blue eyes! I will get you water because you're going to marry me and I can't have you dying without water!'. Zack couldn't really tell what exactly was said—it was a trouble of ignoring people when they begin to become retards around him.
"My Gaia," Cloud whispered. His face was sickly pale and he seemed to be staring off into the darkest recesses of space, not know the way out. Barely able to move his limbs, Cloud climbed back onto the bed and hid underneath the blankets. Zack heard him mumble for a fortress.
"So, I got rid of the kid because she has to run home for water for you."
Cloud gave a small cry and his head darted out from the blankets. "It's only four blocks away. She'll be back, and then I'm going to end up dead from a squeezing twelve-year-old."
"Hey, you were the one who saved her. You can't blame your mouth for being so soft she thinks you're some type of angel who brought her back from death. Kids're kinda weird. And, I'll bet you twenty gil, that she's already begged her pops to let her marry you—" Cloud's hand clapped around Zack's mouth in fear.
"She might hear you!"
"But I sent her to get you some water."
"But she's one of them. She probably has..."
Zack cocked his head to the side, a smirk slipping from one corner of his mouth to the other. "Oh..." he said in mischievousness, "you're actually terrified of the little kid, aren't you?"
Cloud cringed when what sounded like fireworks went off from above. He didn't seem to think for a moment before nodding his head extremely fast, a "Yes," coming out like a bullet from a gun. "You've got to save me," he said, pulling his hands out from the bed. "Normally it wouldn't faze me, but this girl, this Priscilla, she wants me like Yuffie wants candy."
"Noticed that much." Zack put both of his hands behind his head, staring off at the ceiling. "Well," he gave a small knowing smirk as he twisted his head to the side, "you could just trick the kid. Probably isn't smart enough to know all too much or even ask one of the others, so I guess this could work out..." One hand came from behind his head and lightly rubbed his chin. "but the only thing is that you'll need to kind of play along. Got it?"
"Yeah, yeah," Cloud mumbled under his breath, Zack seeing that the blonde was now past the stage of horror and now finally noticing the horrible sound. "What in the Planet is that shit?"
Shrugging a bit and leaning up, using his arms to push him up, Zack scratched at his head. His hair was frizzy, he noticed with a bit of anger as a few pieces stuck to his skin but the rest stood out against all gravity. "Gunna guess that it's the Shinra inauguration for Ruf-assholo. That dumb-ass newbie did say that there was going to be some type of thing like this in the Mythril Mines, 'member?"
A quick nod came from Cloud's direction and the ex-SOLDIER continued, "Anyway, that damn music's been playing since before I woke up. That little kid's got a bony ass, y'know. Was sitting on me for like a half a fuckin' hour before you made a noise and made her—"
"Wait--" Cloud's eyes narrowed and a bit of his hair fell in front of his left eye. "You're saying that you were awake with Priscilla sitting on you and you didn't bother to get rid of her?!"
Zack nodded once, sharply. "Yep. Thought about telling her to go, even opened my eyes and mouth, but she was just staring at you with this lusty gleam in her eye, and it was gross so I pretended like I didn't see her. It's not my responsibility to stop fangirls from mind-raping you. I've got to deal with my own fangirls—"
"All you have is Aeris, and she doesn't try to do that while you're half unconscious!" Cloud seethed.
"Oh, like you'd know what we're doing at night, Cloudy-boy."
Cloud turned his head into the blankets in what Zack could only take as disgust as he mocked the older man. "'Oh Aeris, make sure that you don't put your hand there; Cloud's a light sleeper and you don't wanna wake him up with your head like that!'"
Zack narrowly missed the punch aimed at his skull. "Aw." Zack grabbed Cloud and pulled him out of his blankets, and forced the boy's head against his chest as he patted the boy's blonde hair with soft strokes. "Cloudy-woudy, don't be jealous. I still love you!"
There was a muffled reply, but Zack chose to ignore it, especially when the words 'bastard' and 'Fair' were thrown into the mix.
"Now, when the kid comes back form dragging your lily-white ass some water, I'm going to need you to just go with whatever I do, got it? No beating me over the head, screaming or threatening to shove your katana in my ass. Gotcha, right?"
Cloud nodded and mumbled incoherently again.
"What was tha'?"
"I said I won't stab you with Seraphina. It's the name of my sword, Seraphina," Cloud explained slowly.
"Huh," Zack said as he let go of the blonde. "That sounds a bit familiar. Heh, not important anyway, right?"
"Nope," Cloud shrugged. "So, what's the plan to take Priscilla leave me be?"
Zack rubbed at the bridge of his nose. "Wait until she gets back, which should be soon, as far as I'm aware. Doesn't take all that long to run four blocks and back. Maybe a bit harder with a glass of water that you aren't trying to break or spill, but I'd expect that she'll haul ass to get here quick. Just do whatever I do, gotcha?"
"Fine, fine."
Zack did not know exactly what to do. While he was a brilliant man, or so he prided himself to be, sometimes he knew his plans would backfire on him and light his ass on fire. Which was, unsurprisingly, exactly what happened when the girl burst into the room and Zack pinned Cloud to the bed and leaned forward, his lips an inch away from the blonde's. There was a tense moment where Cloud's face warped into something unimaginable and Zack moved his knee to the teenager's thigh, tapping him lightly to remind him to just go with it, to go with the flow.
Priscilla dropped the glass of water and the cup shattered when it impacted the floor. Zack couldn't turn away from Cloud, in risk of blowing the entire idea up in a cloud of formidable smoke, no pun intended. So, they were still, Zack on top of Cloud, lips all but brushing his own soft ones, while a little girl watched on, her heart probably breaking in two. It was a harsh reality, and Zack felt a twinge of guilt when he heard the girl flop ungracefully to the floor in a fit of tears.
They hadn't even needed to kiss.
"Oh! Oh! Yo—you're toget—" Priscilla hiccuped nosily as she attempted to make words out of the sight she had seen. Zack wanted to laugh but chose to keep still. He sent one look at Cloud, his parted mouth seeming to glisten. Maybe one day this kid'll get someone, get lucky and get somebody like Cloud, He thought as he sent a brief wink to the blonde before backing up.
"I, uh, yeah," Cloud said nervously as he scooted off of the bed, and Zack watched, not surprised when he got off of the bed and patted the girl on the shoulder. "You're very pretty, Priscilla," there was a bit of exasperation in the boy's voice, "but I'm far too old for you, you see. And anyway, I'm... with someone." Zack scratched his head again the moment Cloud sent an angry glare his way.
Zack mouthed a quick, 'You were the one to agree with me, dumbass,', before speaking to the little girl. "But I'm sure if Cloud here wasn't already in a relationship, and was like, seven years younger, he'd totally be with you."
"But he's only sixteen!" Priscilla wailed dramatically. Zack wondered for a moment if the girl wanted to become and actress, a definite possibility considering the copious amounts of tears running down her cheeks.
"An' who told you that?"
"Yuffie!"
Little twit. I'm going to strangle her with both hands. Zack pitied the poor girl now, and he gave a rather embarrassed sigh. "He's twenty-one, sweetheart," there was a sniffle and Zack saw Cloud take his hand from the girl's hair. "Yuffie made a big lie and said that Cloud was younger, but he isn't. He may look like he's sixteen, and he sure as Gaia acts like it sometimes, but he's too old for you kiddo."
"Yeah, Zack's right." Cloud knelt down near the girl, resuming his patting. "Yuffie didn't tell you the truth, and I'm sorry you're so sad. Just..."
"If you were five years younger and didn't like boys, would you be with me?"
Oh my...
"You'd be the first girl on my list."
"Tif— it'd probably be best if you kept Yuffie away from me and Chocobo-head here for a lil' while. We are kinda planning out her death, and it's extremely bloody and stuff. I know you want to kill her yourself, so you can have that. Just keep her away."
Zack looked over at the bouncy, overly-hyper girl that was playing on the front steps with Priscilla, who still refused to smile. Zack felt a twang of pity to the poor girl; the first heartbreak was never the best, and always ended messily. Like pinning Cloud underneath him. Boy, that was a bad idea, Zack thought as he snapped his eyes away from the little girl, who sat with her head in her hands, heart probably, no doubt, crushed by their antics earlier.
"And what did she do this time?" Tifa asked as she put her hands on her hips, sending a look to the area where Yuffie was playing.
"Told the poor kid that Cloud was sixteen and available for her to woo. She glomped him this morning and scared the living shit out of him. We kinda, uh, played a bit of a trick on her to get her away; she was giving both of us the heebie-jeebies. Anyway, a broken heart later, we found out that it was twit. I think I may have been hallucinating when I said maybe we should bring her along with us. Too late now, though. She's become a disease we can't heal. Still, maybe we can tie her up and leave her somewhere later on."
Tifa huffed and grabbed her ponytail. "And how did you convince Priscilla that Cloud wasn't available?" There was something in her voice, a bitter trace of arsenic, and the ex-SOLDIER was reminded of a day not too long ago where the sun was gone and there was just pools of blue. Tifa was a protective woman, and Zack knew exactly what would happen if he told her.
"Just a little trick, Tifa doll. Don't you worry your pretty head over it. Anyhow, got the kid to maybe snap into reality. I think she kind of hates me all kinds though. Yep." Zack nodded his head sagely when the girl picked up her head and narrowed her eyes at him. He couldn't be mad in the least; it was his fault that Cloud was no longer a possibility in her life. Wouldn't stop her for long though.
Kids tend to build their own make-believe world. In a month's time she'll be thinking that she can break us up, a non-existent couple, and run off with him into the sunset on chocobo. Yeah. Kids are a bit weird. I wonder, did I ever do that crazy shit?
"Can we pretend like you know what we did and that you feel at least slightly bad for me, who has to deal with little girl glaring and making little voodoo dolls to stab, hoping it inflicts pain on me? And I'm not mean or a bad person, do quit looking at me like that."
"Mmhmm." Tifa dropped her hands to the side. "Anyway, where is Cloud? I haven't seen him."
Zack pointed to the small post office, where Cloud leaned against the door. "He's the town hero at the moment, so I suckered him into getting the post office to send the materia to the next town. Guy in there probably wishes me dead."
"Only a little," the dark-haired woman smiled softly, reminding Zack for a moment of his own mother. Granted, his mother had a mean streak a mile long, but the woman loved him. Tifa probably didn't love him at all, only thinking of him as a friend, at best, but Zack was grateful to her... even when she threatening him.
"Ah, I helped kill the beastie that wanted to eat the town's favorite fangirl, so I guess I'm a little more liked than yesterday. And do you know when exactly that damn fanfare for Rufus started?"
Tifa did not know. "I'm sorry," she said. There was a moment of silence before she continued. "When I woke up it was playing, so I'm going to say probably before seven and what the fuckis Cloud doing?"
Zack turned to see Cloud being mercilessly hugged, much like earlier, by Priscilla again.
"Oh well. His death."
"So she wants you to use her dolphin to get into Junon?" Zack felt as perplexed as he was sure he looked. How in the world was that possible? Use a dolphin to get into Junon?
Cloud nodded. "She gave me some materia as well."He held out his wrist. A small ball of red hung next to his other summons materia. "It's not another chocobo," Cloud stated scathingly. "It's actually a rather beautiful woman goddess. Priscilla called her 'Shiva' and said that it was her grandfather's. And no Yuffie, I am not giving it to you, especially after this morning's fiasco."
"Aw, that wasn't my fault, you big meany-face!"
"It does not matter, Yuffie. I believe that it would be best for Cloud to follow this young girl and use this dolphin to get into Junon. It is plausible for you to help us get in, correct, Cloud?" Red nudged himself into the circle, drawing attention from the girl, who was before then still glaring daggers at Zack. Now though, to the violet-eyed man's pleasure, she was too busy playing with Red's hair; at least it wasn't him.
"Maybe Cloud and Zack could...?"
"No, Miss Aeris! I refuse to help him!" Zack looked down when he heard Red give a small growl. The girl had her hands entwined in Red's fur, and they didn't look as if they would be coming out any time soon. "Only Cloud!"
Well, Cloud's more than competent. And even though I'm supposed to be the leader, he'll have to go alone. Zack scrunched his nose in distaste. Priscilla was becoming more and more bothersome by the moment.
"Jus' long as he gets us in. I don' care how he does it. Chocobo-head, you're gunna go 'lone, 'ight?"
"Fine, Barret. I'll go alone."
Zack looked at Cloud, whose face was lost in the sea. He was turned away from the group, and eyes trained into the wide, polluted ocean. There was something there, in his bright mako blue eyes that made Zack shiver with unknown, unthinkable emotions.
The dream from the night before came back, and Zack tasted curdled milk on his tongue.
There was something that wasn't quite right, but Zack felt that it had nothing to do with Cloud. There was something in the air, like impending war, and Zack could feel it against his skin. It was in his nostrils, on his tongue, in his very being.
But Zack ignored it because the time for worrying was not at that moment, with the dead fish smell and light breeze of salt and death.
Midgar was the city of fools, but Junon was its sister.
The end of this chapter, and I'm really kind of pleased and at the same time not very pleased. I know, I'm trying to understand that myself. Anyway, I hope you liked it!
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