Thanks to the guests for the reviews! I really quite liked writing this chapter as I love dialogue between Fiona and James. There's quite a bit of it here and we also meet Elizabeth again.

Chapter Thirty Eight - The House on the Hill

"...and sure wasn't he happy as Larry farming those pigs; even though they cost him an arm and a leg!" Gillette was smiling reservedly and I could tell by the mirth in his eyes that he wanted to laugh as freely at my tale as lieutenant Thompson did. "You'll never hear of someone away with the fairies as much as he was, I swear it!"

"And that is the ending of it all?" Thompson asked, aghast.

"Bless him, he wasn't the full shilling but I suppose it's easy to halve the potato where there's love. He did it for his mother. Yes, that's the long and short of it."

Thompson shook his head slowly as he smiled. "You really do tell the most astonishing tales Miss O'Connell!"

"No wonder my countrymen are a laughing stock when some of them make fools of themselves like that. They've a lot of heart though which is the main thing."

We fell into an easy silence as we watched the first strains of light appear on the horizon. Land had been sighted some time ago as I sat along the bow with the two officers for company. We'd sailed through the night and all day at a fair speed before spending some hours languishing in darkness as we waited for the safety of daylight. James had been adamant the evening before that he did not want to make port until the sun was firmly high in the sky. I had the sneaking suspicion that he wanted to avoid at all costs an altercation with the man who's name graced the scrap of parchment that was rolled tightly and buried in my pocket. Thus we were forced to wait.

I was not aware that James was watching me from the quarterdeck. He was both amused and perturbed by the easy going nature of the conversation he'd seen us partake in at the bow. I think he'd realised for the first time that I was not entirely comfortable around him even though I entirely trusted him, whereas I did not feel at all unnerved by his officers. He says he was pleased to see my spirit returned to me a little after the events of recent days but that he still wondered what it was that had me avoiding his gaze so much. He never for a second managed to stumble upon the truth of course. He thought of everything but the simple fact that I held him in far too high an esteem to be called reasonable or simply friendly. Indeed he himself was struggling with his own conflicting feelings. Whilst conversation between the two of us was almost always of a serious nature, he was distracted to find me so at ease with his officers. we chatted and laughed over nondescript things and the conversation remained light and innocent. James told me not long ago that he felt inadequate without knowing why. I think the truth of it was that he hankered to be a part of those silly conversations where we talked about nothing of any consequence. It was appealing to him as it never had been before. In one way Elizabeth might have fitted such a mould. From what I know of her now I can say that I don't think she is fond of small talk and neither was James. He'd likely been taught that there was little time for it upon the sea. Somehow I'd made him begin to rethink his opinion of the pastime.

It was the gentlest and briefest of touches to my shoulder that disrupted my thoughts. I'd lost track of time slightly as we walked the slightly inclined streets of Port Royal, meandering away from the port and into the more built up area of the town. I turned my head to find James watching me was we walked, a frown appearing on his face as my eyes met his.

"Perhaps I spoke out of turn earlier. I fear that my lack of consideration for your situation has upset you. That was not my intention."

I shook my head at him. "You haven't upset me Commodore. It's something I've needed to come to terms with for a while now. It should have been something I gave more thought to long before now but I did not let myself. I should have known that to bottle all of it up like that might have caused such a sense of panic when the realisation finally came. It's my own fault really. It's odd to think that I've gold in my pocket, enough to reasonably to get by on but I feel more lost now than when I had nothing to my name. It's true what they say, gold means nothing really. It can't give me back the life I had before. It's not enough to purchase myself permanent lodgings or a ship and therefore I have no way in which to gain from the use of it. It rests in my pocket like some sacred sort of talisman that I am afraid to make use of for fear that one day I might have a need of it. It's the starting point of the rest of my life, whatever that might be. I won't lie and say it's not a daunting thought because it is. I suppose I do have the option of finding passage on another ship. I'd not have to pay for passage as I could work. Perhaps you might be able to recommend a ship in port that's headed in the right direction?"

James offered a grim smile. "I do not think anyone could ever mistake you for a pirate after those words. I made you a promise that I would endeavour to ensure that you reached a final destination of your choice in safety. Indeed I believe I offered you passage to Ireland if you had want or need of it. That offer still stands. There are of course things that I must deal with here first, but once my business is concluded you need only decide upon a destination Miss O'Connell."

His generosity was not something I felt I could even attempt to understand and so I did not try to. I glanced behind me at the quiet street to give myself more time to think of a reply and found James's officers following us at a short distance. They appeared at ease and glad to be upon dry land again but I could sense that they were covertly observing the streets in anticipation of some form of confrontation. James too seemed comfortable at first glance. I could sense the tension in his shoulders though. It did make me wonder at their slow pace for a few seconds before I suddenly realised that it was likely for my own benefit. Indeed as I turned back to the street ahead of us I knew I could not manage a faster pace in fear of my knee locking.

"I can't ask you to do that," I replied softly as we turned a corner and met a steeper incline. "I appreciate your offer just as I did the last time you made it but I don't think it would be right for you to do that. People will talk. If it were some fine lady then things might be different. You'd be doing the decent thing in providing passage but when it's someone like myself it would only cause scandal. People would be saying I'd duped you or seduced you or something like that. They'd say all sorts of things. We'd only be asking for trouble."

"Perhaps I am too aware of the fickleness of the spoken word Miss O'Connell, or perhaps I pride myself too much on my naval rank and the respect if affords but I never did have much of a care for gossip when it concerns myself. If people choose to gossip about such things then they are already afforded the knowledge that you have already spent months aboard my ship unchaperoned but for a cluster of pirates. The fact that you appear unscathed and as forthright as ever will attest to the fact that nothing untoward occurred. I think perhaps the people of Port Royal will be more concerned with your friend Mr. O'Malley. You perhaps are not aware that he is a wanted man. There is a warrant for his arrest that came in from Port Maria some weeks ago. I was informed of it when we docked this morning. He will likely not be summoned there as Governor Swann and myself are present here to preside over any judicial proceedings. I thought I should inform you that there is not much hope of a reprieve for your friend. He's wanted for crimes of piracy. He'll face-"

I grimaced and interrupted him before he could divulge any more information. "Yes, I know he's a scoundrel and a pirate. I've always known. I know what fate awaits him. I haven't yet forgiven him for selling me out to Townshend but I'm not going to say he deserves to die. In fact, I'm not sure any man deserves to die unless he's taken a life himself." I recalled then the scene I'd witnessed aboard The Grace, when Patrick had shot Mr. Doyle before my eyes. Perhaps I was too trusting of people even after they'd done wrong. I sighed heavily and shrugged when I felt James's eyes upon me again. "Perhaps I need to reconsider on Patrick's part. He's not who I thought he was. I need to keep telling myself that."

"I do marvel at your maintaining such an impartial view of the world after spending so long at sea. I am in no doubt that you will have seen sights that have shocked and disturbed you and still you maintain that there is good in the world. I do appreciate that you thought of Patrick O'Malley as a friend at one time. You not only grieve for the loss of his life but for the memory of his brother. I think perhaps you wish to see him in a good light because you think that your late captain would wish you to. That is a rather painful way to live, Miss O'Connell. You will not thank yourself for such thoughts in later life."

I dearly wanted to laugh then, but my knee twinged painfully and I slowed my steps imperceptibly. "Later life is not something I have a cause to think about very often. It's more about day to day for me. I don't know what will happen tomorrow, let alone in a few weeks time. I can't plan for the future, especially now. I'm not exactly spoilt for choice am I? I've nowhere to go."

"Perhaps that is not quite true." James slowed his steps even more as he turned to glance up at a building nestled behind a vast garden of wild flowers and trees. Evidently the house was empty and had been for some time, but I found something quite charming in the wildness. Of course it was not ever a house I would have hoped to see myself in one day for it was grand indeed. From what I could see through the foliage it was a four storey house, white washed and almost glistening in the sunshine. The windows were shuttered so I was not able to glimpse any of the interiors but I was sure everything was under dust sheets anyway. Despite the wildness being somewhat maintained in that the path from the gate was still accessible, it was clear that the house had not been a home for some time. James turned back to the road then, his observation of the house apparently over. When he found me still intrigued by the wild flowers intertwined with the wrought iron gates he nodded towards the house. "My residence here in Port Royal. It has not much changed from the time of my predecessor. Alas I have not had cause to stay there for above ten days since I was named commodore. There is much improvement to be made I fear, but I have not had the time to spare it a thought."

We moved beyond the house slowly and I was forced to tear my gaze away from the flowers that I found somewhat enchanting, perhaps because they seemed so at odds with the put together man who walked alongside me. "It seems too pretty a house to be so locked up," I supplied as I tried my best to remain in line with him as we walked. "And from the outside it looks well enough. I can't see that much needs improving there. I even like the flowers but then I grew up running through fields of weeds and brambles. That kind of wildness reminds me of freedom. I suppose though that you might prefer to manifest a differing perspective. Freedom does well enough for everyone but a commodore in the navy."

"Indeed I never did think you the type for such observations Miss O'Connell." James smiled at me briefly but the expression did not last. "Perhaps I am not the person to own such a home. It is a large house, built for a family. It is a foolish notion really for anyone to have considered it the home of a Commodore who will likely spend half of his year at sea. Most of my little time here will undoubtedly be spent at Fort Charles."

Somehow I doubted that. She lived there in Port Royal. Of course he'd spend his hours trailing after her skirts. Even married she obviously still held some appeal. As we rounded another corner and I glimpsed a much grander house than the one before perched a the top of the hill I suddenly realised that although I had walked with James from the port, I had no idea where his intended destination was, or mine for that matter. "Commodore, might I ask where exactly it is we're walking to? Should I not be taking rooms in an inn near the port?"

James gestured then towards the house before us on the hill and I felt my that suspicions were about to be confirmed. "I considered my own home of course," James replied, "But reputations were to be considered. I did not think it wise to have you stay in my home."

"People would probably think I was a kitchen maid," I chuckled lightly. "But if you're right about people here respecting you then I should stay elsewhere. I'm not the kind of person you should welcome into your home. I consort with pirates, remember?" My attempt at humour fell upon deaf ears as James threw me a curious glance.

"I believe Miss O'Connell that it was your reputation that I was considering. You are an unmarried woman. I thought it best to house you under the care of another woman. That house is the governor's residence." I felt the nerves begin to build in my stomach. "I regularly visit governor Swann when I can as he has been a mentor of sorts to me over the years. It will afford us the chance to talk still, without causing a scandal. Whilst here in Port Royal we are in a rather precarious position. There are those here who might use such a scandal to their advantage. Mrs. Turner will be well equipped to ensure that you are comfortable and sheltered. Aside from my own residence, it is the safest building in the town. I fear that although Fort Charles is in essence under my command, we may face certain obstacles there. It is perhaps not the fortress that it was once intended to be. I think now that it has already yielded to that which might in turn tear it down brick by brick."

"Is this some sort of game?" I asked before I could stop myself. "You're taking me to the house of the woman that you're in love with? Are you mad?"

I didn't realise I had stopped walking until James stopped ahead and turned to face me. "I thought I had explained my reasoning."

"What will she think of all this though? Your Elizabeth? What will she say when she receives you in her grand drawing room and I come trailing in behind you? Have you seen the state of me? I'm a very poor offering if jealousy is the emotion you wish her to feel. Heavens, I'll be an amusement to her certainly! If that is what you were thinking, then I decline to be part of such games. The only one who would look a fool in that scenario is myself. She's much too grand to think anything of me!"

James appeared not to know what to say to my outburst and I was immediately sorry for making him feel uncomfortable. Heaven knows I knew what that felt like. His mouth opened and closed a few times as he appeared to rethink his response. Eventually he sighed and shook his head slightly. "It appears Miss O'Connell that I am not the only one who judges rashly and harshly. I believe I did tell you once before that you have quite the warped view of yourself. A woman who shrinks from praise and mirrors alike; you are rather an oddity. I've never met a woman like you. Whats more, Mrs. Turner has not so much the mind of a society lady as you might have thought. Indeed I think she would be rather fascinated by someone with as much life experience as yourself. I do not believe she has ever judged someone hastily in her life."

"Excepting you; you mean to imply?" I'd stepped forward and closed the gap between us, my eyebrows raised even as he broke eye contact and glanced up towards the house again. "God you really are still in love with her, aren't you? Even though she's more unattainable now than she ever was." James began to move again and I realised he was not going to offer up any reply, his hands clasped behind his back as he reclaimed the pace we had walked at seconds before. "I'm not meaning to cause any offence commodore..." I rushed to keep up with him, wincing as my knee locked. Thanking the lord that I didn't trip and fall I slowed down again, resolving that to have him tear on up the hill without me was preferable to falling flat on my fact in front of him in an attempt to keep up. I placed my feet carefully in the next few steps I took and hoped that he really wasn't about to rush off without me because for all of my pride I did not like the thought of making my way to that house on my own.

I hadn't realised how much I was watching my feet until a shadow crossed my path. James had fallen behind so that he walked alongside me once more. "I do not believe you ever willingly do mean to cause offence," James supplied thinly. "You have the natural propensity to be as honest and as pragmatic as it is humanly possible to be. It is not a trait that will always be admired. For the most part I am sure you will by now be aware that I am inclined to appreciate it, however. It is refreshing to meet a woman so willing to speak her mind without caution. I am accustomed to the kind of conversation that makes for a very dull evening where women are concerned. Mrs. Turner was of course always an exception to such a rule."

Of course she is, I thought blandly. I hastened to speak, lest he think I really had meant to antagonise him. "If I can explain myself; I told you once before that I thought she was a fool, and I still agree with that statement. I do however understand why she might not have been as open with you as you might have wished her to be. You were always destined to fulfil your ambitions to rise within the ranks of the navy. When you made your interests in her clear I'm sure she felt rather pressured. Despite whatever feelings she had buried within her own heart and mind she would have known how society and her family would expect her to marry well. She'd have felt confused because she knows on parchment you are just the kind of match she should be hoping to make. Add to the mixture the fact that she'll have at least have liked you well enough to consider any offer you might have made. I've already told you before that you're a decent man. If she is as good a person as you say, then she will have given much thought to the matter. It won't have been easy for her to dash your hopes. Imagine having all of that expectation on your shoulders. You'll understand that at least. You've practically been in training to join the navy since you were born after all. No matter the path that was lain for you, as a man you have some say in it.

"Women of a higher class are pushed and pulled every which way to suit the needs of those around them. They are sold off like cattle to men twice their age and are expected to conceive a child within mere weeks to secure the family line. I'm so glad I got to chose my own path in life. I cannot help but feel for women who are stuffed into stays and forced to sit in drawing rooms all the live long day with not an ounce of action at all; waiting for the first man that can impress their father with his connections and fortune. To make the choice that Mrs. Turner has made is commendable. She's a fool in the sense that she'd have been set for life if she'd married you, commodore. She'd never have wanted for anything at all and with you rising in the navy she'd have been the toast of ton. She'd have been content because how could she not be? You are not the kind of man who wishes to cause strife and grief unnecessarily. You're reasonable. You're kind and you're intelligent. I'd say that any marriage starting on those foundations is sure to succeed. The fondness would grow later. The thing is, would she have been truly happy in such a situation? Or is she happier now that she has chosen her own path and the man that she says she loves? In that respect I cannot call her a fool. Indeed you feel grief and heartbreak but can you not understand how much worse it would have felt if you had married Mrs. Turner and found her wanting? She made her choice as much for you as she did for herself. I'm not saying that she'd have let her head be turned or that she'd have have affairs or elope or anything like that but imagine being married to someone very agreeable and not being able to return their feelings no matter how much you try? I expect she'd have felt guilty and she would have grown lost, in time. You'd have felt guilty for her loosing her sense of self worth. The truth is that neither of you would have done anything wrong but you'd still be guilt ridden and angry. What kind of life is that? That's why women should be permitted to chose their own paths. Men might think that they know best in all matters but how on earth can you? We women are half the human race! That's half of the world that men have no clue about! I applaud your Mrs. Turner for stepping out of the net she was ensnared in and pushing the boundaries. Of course her life might be that much harder because of the choices that she has made, but she will be happier. She did it all for love. It's a bold choice. I hope I get the chance to make the right choices for the same reason in the future, even though I do not wish to think too far ahead or to place myself on a pedestal. I hope I have at least earned the right to such a choice as a woman."

"As I said...honest and pragmatic." James smiled softly. "Perhaps you have a missed vocation as a chaperone to wealthy young women Miss O'Connell. Of course, I cannot think their parents would appreciate such advice but the young women would certainly benefit from such sound teachings. Where choices are concerned I think it should be fitting that you make your own all through your life. You appear to have a knack for making the right ones despite your disillusioned trust of those who do not mean well."

I chuckled softly. "God I don't think anyone should take my words as gospel. Can you imagine it? I'd have the whole of London reluctant to marry!"

"Better that than silly women, those I cannot abide," James mused.

We'd reached the gates of the house. I sucked in a breath and stopped walking as I looked up at the handsome facade. I had expected to catch sight of Elizabeth draped across the balustrade of the balcony, mocking me from on high even after I had slightly come to her defence during our conversation. I'm still not quite sure where that came from truth be told. I think I liked how James saw me and I didn't want him to know that of Elizabeth I sometimes thought badly. Of course the balcony was really deserted. The shutters of the windows were open but there seemed to be no life behind them. The house did not hold as much charm as the smaller one belonging to James that sat a little way down the hill. The flowers and shrubbery were well clipped and trimmed, likely testament to the workmanship of many gardeners. The whitewashed pillars that held up that balcony above stood resolute and magnificent in the afternoon sun, making me all the more sure that this was not the place for me.

"Are you really sure about this?" I asked James, suddenly fearful as the house loomed closer. "What if they send me away again?"

"Miss O'Connell, why on earth do you think I sent Mr. Turner on ahead earlier his morning? We are expected. I would not have you housed down in the port for all the tea in china. That smart mouth of yours and Lord Beckett's trickery would cause no end to our problems. These people are my friends. They will not turn away those in need, especially not if I have vouched for you. You are as welcome here as you would have been in my own home, now come."

He left me no choice really because he gripped my elbow then and pulled me along with him towards the stone steps that led up to the house. I like to think the gesture was to aid me ascending the steps as my knee was indeed grateful for the support but I knew deep down that James thought I was likely to run away. He's told me since that he did think that. I was like a deer caught in lantern-light, startled and ashamed all at once. Of course he thought I was about to bolt. Who can blame me really? There I was, with a man I'd come to care for greatly as we approached the house of the woman he was still very much in love with. I probably looked like I'd been trailed through a hedge backwards although James denies this. He's just being kind though. I'd pulled my hair up and away from my face back in the port but I was sure I looked more pale than I normally did, more tired and more confused. The last few days had been eventful and I think it is alright that I say I was weary and in need of rest. It's not weak to admit that. At the time I think I thought it was very weak but now I see the usefulness in swallowing one's pride. What use would I have been that day if James had decided upon a wracking of the brains long into the night? I had not the willpower for such a thing at all.

I have learned that a pretence of strength is much more of a weakness than any of my fragility. It took me some time, mind. It also took a lot of James's patience, as you will come to learn later on in our story. I felt a little deflated that I was to be led into the foyer of such a home when I looked terrible even as the doors opened and James propelled me through them. The foyer was vast, greater even than my uncle's in London. The marble floor stretched from our feet to the foot of a sweeping staircase that caressed one wall. I could hear the bustle of what I assumed was the household staff and the clatter of heeled shoes on the hardwood flooring of the upper level as they drew nearer the staircase. I only realised that two footmen had opened the doors for us when they hurried to shut them behind us. I shivered despite the fact that James's coat was still in place around my shoulders. It crossed my mind then that perhaps I should remove it. What a sight I must have looked in his coat of all things! That would really make people talk. Just as I clutched the sleeve to yank it down and pull myself free, a melodic voice from above stopped me in my tracks.

"James!" We both jerked our heads upward in answer to the call, watching as a flurry of ivory chiffon descended the stairs rapidly, and it took a second or two before I was able to take my eyes from the fine dress and really look at the woman I'd heard so much about. "I thought you'd have arrived much earlier than this!"

She was beautiful, there was no doubt about that. Silk-like skin was pulled taught over pronounced cheekbones that tapered down from a thin nose to full red lips; lips that were pulled into a somewhat sardonic smile. Her fair hair was piled into a fontange on top of her head, artfully arranged by a maid to ensure that a bonnet would rest nicely there should the lady have a need to step out of doors. She reached out a hand to James as she approached but seemed to think better of it almost instantly and pulled it back. She clasped her hands together respectfully and peered at James as if trying to discern his deepest thoughts.

"Mr. Turner faced no opposition then upon his return?" James asked quietly and I turned to him, sure that I heard something untoward in his tone. Indeed his expression looked somewhat pained, as if even looking in Elizabeth's direction was causing his grief to reestablish itself tenfold.

"Of course not! I would have sent word if he had!" came the woman's curt reply. Her gaze slowly slid to me as if she wished to calculate me. I didn't move, sure that whatever I would say or do would prove wrong in the eyes of a creature that many deemed so perfect.

"This is Miss Fiona O'Connell. I believe Mr. Turner will have informed you that she requires a place to-"

"You should have brought her to me sooner, James!" Elizabeth smiled softly at me then before gesturing a small white hand behind her. Another woman came forward, this one clearly in the garb of a maid. "This is Mary, Miss O'Connell-"

"Fiona! It's just Fiona. There's no airs where I'm concerned." I threw her a pleading look as she continued to smile and hoped that she'd not continue to address me so formally. That was the last thing I wanted from someone well above my station.

"Very well, but you must call me Elizabeth then, as James has failed to introduce me. As I was saying, this is Mary. Accompany her upstairs if you will. She will show you to a room of your own where you may stay. You must think of yourself as entirely at home." She threw her gaze to Mary the maid then who beckoned for me to follow her. "Anything she needs or wants, Mary."

"Of course Miss." Mary's voice was so rich and full of flavour that I had no doubt she was a native to the island. Her dark skin was healthy and glowing, telling of a good and healthy life. I followed hesitantly, more conscious of my injury than I had been in months. It was one thing to think of James seeing me tripping over my own knee, but for his Mrs. Turner to see it would likely be the death of me.

"James Norrington, you are a fool! Will told me everything! You kept a young woman forcibly aboard your ship for months with no prospect of release! Just who do you think you are?"

Elizabeth's shrill tones echoed throughout the foyer as I followed in Mary's footsteps up the sweeping staircase, making me jump. She was beautiful, but I had not expected such character from one so polished and refined. I glanced back over my shoulder briefly to find her toe to toe with James, staring up into his face as if she might hope to stare him down.

"Elizabeth I-"

"I do not think I care to hear it James! As I said, Will told me everything! If what he says is true and I do not doubt it is, then what befell that poor girl within the last few days is all your fault!"

"I'm aware of that-"

"Are you really?" I had stalled then, thinking that perhaps I should come to James's defence. He glanced up as if anticipating that I might still be listening and threw me a warning glance that told me not to interfere. "James Norrington, for all of your education and schooling, I'm afraid to say you have no notion of what it is to be a woman in this world! How can you be aware? She should have been brought straight to me! Yes, I know she was consorting with pirates but you chose to pardon her. That does not mean you can keep her aboard your ship whilst you follow some wild goose chase. that is unfair!"

James sighed heavily as his eyes left mine and returned to Elizabeth's. "I deserve your ridicule Mrs. Turner. Absolutely I do. I am also grateful for your hospitality. I wonder if your father is at home?"

"Of course he is! We cannot leave for fear of being arrested! Will himself has told you how he was forced to flee." Will Turner emerged from a doorway at the side of the foyer to stand alongside Elizabeth. "Indeed I would be eager to hear your thoughts on why you have all managed to find your way here without Lord Beckett impeding you."

"Come along Miss," Mary called from the top of the staircase and I smiled gently at her to show that I had heard. I threw one glance back at James who had turned slightly towards Will. I could no longer see his expression as the height of Elizabeth's coiffure blocked it from view. I was suddenly bone tired, and the thought of a plush and warm bed was so inviting that I gave up caring about the conversation below. I was grieved to part with James though. After being reunited with him I had hardly left his side. It felt like I was been pried from him once again and I did not feel comfortable with it, for I had no assurances that I would see him again.

In the next chapter, Fiona gets the chance to speak to Elizabeth alone, but what will they talk about; and how will James cope with having both women under one roof?